/ic/ - Artwork/Critique

>>4223995
My life has no direction. I am totally detached from normal society. I've dropped out of school twice and my parents are getting sick of me neeting. I know I need to start making money and become independent but everything seems so bleak. The only jobs in my area are seasonal or minimum wage retail. Getting a job seems like resignation. Im sacrificing my life to barely survive and contribute to a society that has rejected me. I don't even have a family to make my sacrifice worthwhile (and statistically I won't ever). I feel like my only chance of ever escaping this hell is through art. I think the internet has been poison to my life in many ways. We like to think that our decisions are our own but in reality our social circles have a big influence. Youtube has essentially replaced human interaction for me. My social circle is almost entirely people who I will never meet or speak to in person. I feel like I can no longer distinguish reality from digital fantasy. This whole website is a fantasy, but that doesnt stop it from influencing my thoughts. If I quit I would be alone though. Not that I mind being physically alone but I would have no peers to assure me of my course. I think the death of god has extinguished our cultural north star. The sky is clouded, my compass is untrue, and every path I take looks the same. My only comfort is in asceticism which drives me further from normal society. I want nothing more than to be valuable. That is something that I am certain will not be found in solitude. Thanks for reading my schizo blog.