/ic/ - Artwork/Critique

I am a fraud.
I draw hours and hours, and I love drawing so it's essentially a time warp anytime I pick up a pen to draw, and I never notice the time go by.
I am a fraud because I never learned shit, I brute force my way, so to speak, and repeat lines over and over until I draw a good line. If not for digital drawing, I would never cut it as an artist, because I couldn't be able to erase that often.
I have seen artists draw things almost on the first try every time and have a good grasp of the fundamentals but I just can't cut it. I can't even draw a circle.
If I spend 10 hours on some drawing it comes out " ok " and "decent" as in, matching the meager level of what a real artist may scribble on a napkin one drunken night with his opposite drawing hand.
I am trying to read loomis books and when he mentions spacing being the main trick to make shapes resemble real things, my heart ached because I feel like my brain understands it but my hands can't put it to paper. I love this hobby, I am passionate about it, but it pains me to draw, for I am forced to confront my failure as an artist with every stroke and every crooked, messy line my hand vomits out. Some buddies of mine are kindhearted and tell me it isn't that awful, but I can tell they know it's not good as much as I do. When a drawing comes out "ok", I consider it "getting lucky" and I can post it momentarily and then I delete it forever in shame of having created a disgusting wretch of a connection of lines. I know I am now a fraud and I wish to one day become less of a fraud.
Anyone else feel this way?