/ic/ - Artwork/Critique

The past 2 weeks I've getting so fucking pissed off while drawing. I've thrown water bottles and broke shit just due to my sheer incompetence. Every time I draw something and I'm semi-happy about it my fucking brain makes me feel like shit when I start to notice BIG flaws and then the whole dopamine rush is taken away. "This hand isn't good, it's shit", "this hair is boring", etc.. It's always a fucking issue with my art. And I try NOT to draw the same shit every time.
Anytime I have fun it's like its part of the fucking routine to feel like shit right after. I get so fucking upset when I share my art and only to realize that it's complete shit in an area or two. I want to delete it ASAP but it's already too late and deleting it is admitting defeat. Anytime I try to push out of a sketching phase I start to crumble under pressure and get pissed off. I just want my shit to look presentable or draw without getting pissed off. I realize I have so much to train and study. It's completely overwhelming. I just want to have fun. I want to be able to share stuff with my friends and not feel fucking embarrassed every time. I want to take pride in what I make.

I'm too much of a fucking perfectionist and I overwhelm myself. I hate this fucking curse.