MIDDLE AGED MAN THREAD

[Anonymous No.15622223]

Hey fuckos, I'm 35 and need to dress my age. What is your expectation for someone in their mid thirties and how they should dress? What should I avoid so that I'm not wearing something that screams midlife crisis? (besides posting in /fa/ lmoa) I'm a reasonably put-together person who has frequented /fa/ since moot had his quarterlife crisis and created it to help him get over his Zucker phase, but I could use an external vibe check to make sure that I'm not deluding myself.

I wear a lot of floral print collared shirts for my everyday wear. Fall wear is a denim jacket, usually dark denim jeans. I prefer plimsolls, usually Vans. I have some chukkas, but they're cheap and I'm not a fan of them. Might cop some red wings after I buy some furniture.

Am I alright? What am I missing?

[Anonymous No.15622226]

>>15622223
go igorcore

[Anonymous No.15622233]

>>15622226
haha yeah igorcore! I totally know what that is heh heh heh

but in case there's someone reading this thread who doesn't, let's help them out. what's igorcore?

[Anonymous No.15622255]

Your bubbliness and choice of boots screams to me that you frequent a much different site than this board, but that’s besides the point. I would ask what to you screams a mid life crisis? To me, I would avoid trendy, overly branded stuff like street wear, and with your current wardrobe I would keep the floral shirts but ditch the workwear and try to navigate towards something a touch preppier or the hot term recently “dark academia” or even swapping denim for used barn coats from L.L. Bean, but other people might look at you entirely different. That’s not to give you a cop-out answer, my point is just that besides anyone’s opinion, the rule of thumb will probably be regardless of what you wear if it feels like a costume it probably is, if it feels like a style you can carry with inherent confidence, swagger, and not posturing, then keep on keeping on. I would say though you’re currently inoffensive in comparison to most retards your age.

[Anonymous No.15622332]

>>15622255
Thanks, man. I'm actually a dyed-in-the-wool 4chan man, coming up on 14 years stuck in this cesspool. But I learned that being a moody, caustic dork is, as you astutely put it, a costume, and not even an attractive one at that. So I keep it loose.

Good advice on the barn coat. I'll see what I can find. And I guess my definition of midlife crisis is someone who refuses to believe that they're thirty fucking five years old (I have trouble believing it, honestly) and dresses like someone ten years their junior. I have found that for whatever reason, women in their twenties are strongly attracted to men in their thirties, so I want to make sure I'm not dressing like the guys in their own peer group. I would also like to keep my options open for women my own age, as women in their thirties are extremely direct.

I worry with the dark academia look that I'll end up looking more like rodney dangerfield than a sexy archaeology professor, but I'll keep it in mind next time I go thrifting.

[Anonymous No.15622370]

>>15622255
>Your bubbliness and choice of boots screams to me that you frequent a much different site than this board

[Anonymous No.15622393]

First, be aware that /fa/ is mostly populated by underages, people who treat this as worksafe /b/ but with clothes, and 'depressed' 18 year olds who base their entire personalities around appealing to 'art hoes'. Now that that's out of the way..
Wearing a cheap floral print shirts like your OP pic is going to look out of place. Zara is generally low quality and I find the pattern on that shirt to be particularly jarring. If you want to stick with the fun shirts thing, take a look at the patterned shirting from brands such as Dries van Noten or Issey Miyake Men (2013-2019) for IDEAS, given that these usually cost $500+ theres no necessity of purchasing them. Make sure you avoid high polyester (anything higher than 50% is probably a no) content and opt for rayon or cotton. When you say dark jeans, do you mean dark indigo or black? I'm biased against blue/indigo jeans but black just seems plainly more flexible. Denim jacket is good, just ensure that it fits properly and doesn't look inoffensively out of place color wise with your pants and shirts - I would be reluctant to wear a blue denim jacket with blue jeans.
Shoe wise sticking with plimsolls is fine, but consider purchasing some higher quality ones than Vans. I have never had a comfortable pair of Vans, while the Doek shoes here http://store.goodweaver.jp/ are the most comfortable shoes I've worn, aside from Instapumps.
Your hairstyle will probably say alot about trying to dress like you're 25. Avoid going for a trendy haircut and pick and choose carefully something that you like that suits your hair type. If that happens to be trendy then I'm not sure what to suggest. I'd also recommend not cuffing your jeans, there's a guy at my workplace who's probably 31 or 32 who does this and it looks ridiculous.

[Anonymous No.15622957]

>>15622393
This.
>trying to dress like you're 25
I always cringe when I see anyone over 21 wearing oversized pants and huge hoodies like some retarded "muh 90s" nonsense faggotry. Pic related, they look fucking dorky. Let the "street style" garbage only for children.

[Anonymous No.15622970]

>>15622393
Sticky this.

>>15622255
>try to navigate towards something a touch preppier or the hot term recently “dark academia”
This is also fantastic advice.

[Anonymous No.15622973]

>>15622223
>claims to not be a newfag
>doesn't know who igor is

Lol. Pic related is Igor who posts here every single day and has for years.

[Anonymous No.15622977]

Jeans and t-shirts. And not just any old jeans and t-shirts, but multiples of that one brand and size you found that fit you perfectly at 30

[Anonymous No.15622985]

>>15622233
it just means be ugly

[Anonymous No.15623036]

>>15622332
>I worry with the dark academia look that I'll end up looking more like rodney dangerfield than a sexy archaeology professor, but I'll keep it in mind next time I go thrifting.

I would say balancing out the preppy style like for example a sweater with a complimenting patterned button-up underneath, with more woodsy or workwear stuff like the barn coat or a denim jacket you already have is a good fine line and will probably set you apart from falling too much into one category. You seem to have a decent amount of self awareness in regards to the rest of your post. With statement pieces or to avoid looking like a moody Rodney Dangerfield I would incorporate color but like another anon said, avoid gimmicky nostalgia, keep it simple with patterns like argyle picrel or some colorblocking that’s easy to layer, I think a lot of old Tommy Hilfiger and GAP does a good job with this.

[Anonymous No.15623051]

>>15623036
With your shirts for the summer, I don’t see any faults with floral, but depending on what you buy. it could come across as very mallcore, cheap, and by extension kiddish. I would suggest looking at paisley shirts, or stuff with buzzwords like geometric or abstract pattern. There’s fine line in and of itself with this, but i think these would help set you apart from a crowd while also looking clean, refined, and easy to blend in with the rest of your wardrobe.

[Anonymous No.15623079]

>>15622957
Youre an idiot this is paul rudd

[Anonymous No.15623082]

>>15622973
WAYW THATS CECIL YOU FUCKING CLOWN

You insulted someone for the exact thing you did omg i hope this is b8

[Anonymous No.15623089]

>>15622223
Sup, dude, 32 yo oldfag here. I'm a lawyer so I dress preppy most of the time, very basic shit like plain t-shirts, polos, oxford shirts with slim chinos and jeans, etc. but being an oldfag also allows you to wear more risqué stuff since you shouldn't give as many fucks as you used to when you were younger.

A minimalist look with solid colors will work well most of the times.

I myself really like Noboru Kukata's style and might inspire you but growing older also means finding your own style and expressing yourself through fashion.

[Anonymous No.15623091]

>>15623089

[Anonymous No.15623107]

>>15622393
I usually wear dark grey or black. Occasionally indigo but I'm moving away from blue and indigo as it strikes me as too dad tier. Thanks for the heads up on the designers. I'll do some digging and see what I find. Hopefully it doesn't all look like pic related, which is undoubtedly a sick print but on a man my age, it might look stupid. I'm right there with you on materials, I like rayon and cotton and try to avoid plastic shirts. I don't actually own that shirt from zara and tend to go with larger, more asymmetrical prints when I can find them. good looks on those doek shoes. I'll order a pair. As far as hairstyle is concerned, I'm somewhere around John Dwyer from Thee Oh Sees, maybe a little closer cropped on the sides.

Thank you again for this thoughtful, intentional post. It looks like you put some work into it and is deserving of a screengrab or copy pasta for later threads.

>>15622973
The only tripfag I was aware of was sieg, and he's an insufferable faggot.

>>15622977
lol this was my dress code for most of my teen years and half of my twenties. Plain black tee, Levi's 514's.

>>15622985
oh fuck it me, peak igor

>>15623036
fuckin' irony of ironies, i used to collect a bunch of sweaters just like this from thrift stores for most of my twenties. I finally decided that I didn't want to look like a thrift store hobo and ditched them all. I'm a sucker for wool, so I'll see if I can start tracking these down over the next few months. Let me ask you a question on sizing. I wear large, about 16 1/2" collar, 42 jacket size. Should I get XL sweaters or large?

>>15623051
also good advice, I'm sure you're the same guy as the post directly above you. I do like paisley quite a bit and have some already. I will make sure that my wardrobe isn't too one-note.

Thanks again to all of you guys. You've been very gracious and helpful. I'll keep monitoring this thread and appreciate your feedback.

[Anonymous No.15623165]

>>15623089
I have found that I'm more confident in what I wear, but I think there's a fine line between not giving a fuck and so you dress like a bum/dad/weird single guy in his forties and not giving a fuck so you dress like a goddamned fashion legend. I'm trying to navigate towards the latter, but a few times I've caught myself wearing some total boomer shit because I just didn't give a shit. I like this Noboru Kutata guy. It's nice to age gracefully, and I could see me trending closer to his style. it looks fuckin' NICE without being too Hank Hill, and still being casual without wearing a goddamn suit every day.

[Anonymous No.15623298]

>>15623107
> Let me ask you a question on sizing. I wear large, about 16 1/2" collar, 42 jacket size. Should I get XL sweaters or large?

That’s a tricky question, especially in regards to thrifted stuff where sizing is all over the place. Not sure I can help too much but I would say if you’re going to layer it with something else go for the smallest size that fits you comfortably otherwise you’ll have movement like you’re wrapped in bubblewrap. The sweater I posted earlier is a medium which is tts for me, a couple J. Crew mock necks i have are also medium, but stuff like Uniqlo i’ll usually size up, so it depends and with lighter stuff like cotton or merino you can probably get away with any size you like. I honestly get a lot of my stuff off crap like Etsy, so I have a good feel for comparing my measurements with ones included in a listing. In short, I don’t think there’s a one size fits all for this, maybe some other anon can help you more.

[Anonymous No.15623734]

>>15622223
Ever wear plaid, or gingham, or hounds tooth?

[Anonymous No.15623800]

>>15622223
Everyone 30+ should dress like pic related.

[Anonymous No.15624497]

>>15623800
Maybe when I'm 45.

>>15623734
Sure, I've got a few gingham shirts hanging in the closet. Why do you ask?

>>15623298
Thanks, esé. I'm always confused about sweater sizing.

[Anonymous No.15626023]

How about this floral shirt

[Anonymous No.15626029]

>>15626023
If you puke on yourself good luck finding where

[Anonymous No.15626504]

Unironically shop exclusively at J Crew.
t 35 year old

[Anonymous No.15626540]

youre 35 so you should have some disposable income. Look through sites that sell high quality clothes like END, ssense, dover street market. they will give you an overview of some general styles of clothing and outfits for demonstration.

[Anonymous No.15626946]

>>15626504
Aren't they bankrupt or some shit? I do like J Crew, it's just a little safe for me. I dunno.

>>15626540
Very cool, good advice homie. I do have a surprising (to me) amount of disposable income these days. I wish they told me that life would be this good when I was 24. I wouldn't have been such a little prick.

[Anonymous No.15626978]

>>15626946
chill out bro, you're ugly as fuck without any fashion sense. it aint that good!

[Anonymous No.15627010]

wow you guys are cringe. Wear whatever you want OP thats all that matters

[Anonymous No.15627048]

>>15626978
I was going to tell you to fuck off, but then I realized that you're literally just repeating what I've already said about myself. I hurt my own damn feefees and that's a fact.

>>15627010
Appreciate the encouragement, frendo.

[Anonymous No.15627187]

>>15622332
>I worry with the dark academia look that I'll end up looking more like rodney dangerfield than a sexy archaeology professor

Totally agree on that.
When you're 20, you can wear vintage clothes and it looks cool, but when you're 40, vintage clothes are just seen as normal clothes on an old guy.

[Anonymous No.15627835]

>>15622223
>I'm 35 and need to dress my age
says who? your fat wife?

[Anonymous No.15627837]

>>15622223
>Might cop some red wings after I buy some furniture.

[Anonymous No.15627838]

>>15622223
>need to dress my age
cringe

what rule is this??

[Anonymous No.15627941]

>>15627837
God forbid you make your place look nice so you can get friends and sexual partners over, you 15 year old edgy faggot.

[Anonymous No.15628158]

>>15622223
Gym, Business casual, rolled up sleeves, Clean cut.

Don't overdo it.

[Anonymous No.15628219]

>>15627837
Have you seen Chuck Palahniuk's house? He's definitely got some nice furniture. Fight Club is a book, not a religion.

>>15627835
no, the mean teenagers at the mall.

>>15627838
you might be surprised to learn that certain youthful fashions are out of place on someone a little older. There's style, and then there are trends, and trends are meant to be frivolous, seasonal, disposable, just like your youth.

>>15628158
feel it.