/diy/ - Do It Yourself

[Anonymous No.390920]

Do you guys have any hiding spots in your homes?

I've been saving up a little cash here and there for a rainy day, up to about $1,300.00 right now, but I'm growing concerned about keeping so much cash in my house. Sure I could put it in the bank, but that doesn't help if I need it asap or something. I could also put it in the safe, but boy is that obvious and the first place a thief will check.

Right now, its in an envelop that is taped above the door frame in a closet. It's not a bad hiding spot, but if someone were to step into the closet, turn around and look up you'd see it. I want something better.

Ideas? Pic related, seems like a good spot.

[Anonymous No.390939]

I suppose I could bury it out back. But again, not exactly quick access, plus I gotta do it in the middle of the night so no one sees me.

I wish I had a lot of land, would be real easy to hide then.

[Anonymous No.390947]

These make great hiding spots. Tie a very good cord to your package, tie the other end to the vent cover, drop the package down the duct, and when you need to recover it simply remove the vent cover.

[Anonymous No.390950]

My door is hollow (shitty particle board) so I cut off a piece from the top like in your pic and made a little hinged trapdoor, then taped an envelope with monies inside the door.

[Anonymous No.390951]

what the fuck would you suddenly need over 1000 for? what kind of lifestyle do you live? enjoy your money slowly losing value and not generating interest

[Space Race !spYLAesZNE No.390953]

Take a door down and cut a hole in the top. Most inside doors nowadays have this cardboard-like support structure inside that's easy to cut a cavity into. Take that, maybe glue in some walls to keep what's in there from dropping down further and use the piece you cut out to make a disguised opening and you've got yourself a decent cache.

Haven't done it myself but I read about it a while ago and seemed like a good idea. I mean, who checks the tops of doors? Especially if it's just a thin line. You could even embed magnets into it to keep it from coming up randomly and catching on the door frame.

[Space Race !spYLAesZNE No.390955]

>>390951
$1000 isn't really all that much investment-wise and it's good to have around in an emergency when you might not be able to access your bank accounts.

If you can save it up and don't "need" it, why not have a little bit more of a safety net?

[Anonymous No.390958]

>>390951
>interest
how much do you get nowadays for a safe, quickly accessible investment ? 2%pa?
pic related....
id take the cash being on hand when i need it any day, OPs not talking about tens of thousands here.

[Anonymous No.390960]

>>390955
What he said.

>>390951
I can think of tons of reason I might need money quick, and god forbid something happens and they power goes out for a few days, like it did a few months back with hurricane sandy. The banks we're all shut down, you could only get good and gas with cash. Shit happens man, why not be ready?

[Anonymous No.390961]

>>390951
I have like 2gs in cash just from people paying me back or other incidentals. When I pay for something and someone pays me back with 100 dollar bill I add to it rather than depositing cash back in my account.

I just have it in an envelope taped inside a cupboard. Not hidden in the slightest. Though maybe I should make one of those hidden book safes for it, or buy one of those fake cans of shaving cream or something.

[Anonymous No.391084]

>>390953
>>390947
Any good thorough thief would know to look in those places.
First piece of advice for OP: If you plan on storing this money for a long period of time, use the money to buy gold, and store the gold. It will hold its value (and likely increase in value).
You want to come up with a really unique hiding spot. Somewhere nobody would ever look. Got an old VCR? Disassemble the case, and hide your money/gold among the circuitry. Anybody robbing your house is going to ignore an old VCR and go for more expensive blu-ray players and such. They'll check inside vents, on top of doors, in refrigerators, pockets of coats in closets, electrical outlets, take metal detectors to the walls-- But nobody will notice that old VCR gathering dust.

[Anonymous No.391086]

I have a hollowed out book. close the book, paint the edges with glue, and score the inside with a razor, an inch from the edge of the page. Keep scoring until it's as deep as you'd like, insert cash, and put in a bookshelf. Make sure it's a title you'd remember, and you're good.

[Anonymous No.391087]

I either put rolled up bils, or cash in an envelope and put it behind a painting on the wall

[Anonymous No.391103]

Put it in plain sight in a waste basket wadded up in in a piece of paper with other trash.

[Anonymous No.391121]

>>391103
I like the idea of plain sight.

>>391087
I thought about that, but wouldn't someone robbing my place look behind paintings?

[Anonymous No.391120]

>>391103

That's a bad idea. Some people will go through your trash looking for personal information. Also, somebody could decide to do some cleaning for you and empty your trash.

[Anonymous No.391133]

You can make a safe out of a wall socket.Just unscrew it and put your shit in there.

[Anonymous No.391143]

>>390958
Interest is only to counteract devaluation, so if OP stores this cash for 20 years, he will be at a loss, but you are correct it's nothing.

I would advice you OP to put it in the bank.

[Anonymous No.391144]

I cut out a slot in my drywall and put in a coax cable out that wasn't connected. Put my money in that

[Anonymous No.391147]

>in your house
>goes through your trash for personal info or cleans

OCD burglar (named steve obviously)

>>391103
That's what I do with weed in the car. Just wad it up and throw it on the floor with the rest of the trash.

[Anonymous No.391151]

Cash in an envelope taped to the underside of the bottom drawer of the bureau. No one ever looks.

[Anonymous No.391154]

When I was like, 14, I used to hide my porn inside the air vents in the floor.

[Anonymous No.391159]

>>391121
People who rob houses aren't exactly master thieves. Most are looking for cash or stuff to pawn in order get drug money.

[Anonymous No.391160]

Double bag it in ziplocks, and bury under the rocks in your fish tank.

[Anonymous No.391165]

don't bother with shit like op pic, just find a few more places like the one you already use and split the money up between them.

[Anonymous No.391194]

Wadded up socks

[Anonymous No.391205]

I bolted a small safe inside of the cold air return

[Anonymous No.391216]

Get a thin bit of masonite or similar stuff. Cut it to fit perfectly in your junk drawer. Get some sturdy velcro and make two or three big strips. Don't just stick them on the masonite or the drawer bottom; GLUE them down so they're permanent.

Spread the cash evenly between the velcro strips in the drawer bottom. Place the masonite over them, press it down. Now make a handle for the masonite. I suggest a "spilled" tube of superglue stuck permanently there, so you have something to grab and pull the masonite up. Then just re-fill the drawer with junk.

There. Even if some stupid shit pulls the drawer out and empties it on the ground, your false bottom will remain intact and the glue will just look like a mundane fuck-up you haven't noticed yet.

[Anonymous No.391267]

if you have a basement with access to the floor joists above you can fit a false pipe and store stuff in the pipe.
its works better if the basement is unfinished and dark and dusty. no one is going to go poking around old pipes in a dark dirty basement.
once read of someone who bought an old house and discovered a whole lot of old silver coins in a fake pipe in the basement ceiling.

[Anonymous No.391270]

>>391267
that's straight up brilliant!

[Anonymous No.391279]

>safe is the first place they'd check

It's a fucking safe...who cares if they try to check it? It'll be locked and heavy as shit to steal...

what the fuck am I reading?

[Anonymous No.391281]

>>391267
Yeah it works great till you forget all your valuable shit in the fake pipe when you die or move out...

[Anonymous No.391312]

taping cash to the bottom of drawers, behind door frames, or anywhere similar is a shit idea. any professional burglar with more than an hour in your house unmolested will check every place you could tape cash if they suspect you have some. hard to reach, random places that would take weeks to check otherwise are best. so put that cash under some insulation in the attic or in a hole in the wall behind a piece of loose wallpaper. if you go away for the weekend and someone breaks in, you want it to come back before they find it. and ffs don't put it under you mattress.

[Anonymous No.391333]

>>391312

Under attic insulation is a great hiding place. Nobody wants to dig around under nasty dusty fiberglass insulation for hours and hours.

When I was a teenager I used to hide my weed and porno tapes (VHS, yes I'm that old) in the attic insulation. Cops searched the house once after I got into a bit of trouble and never found my stash.

[Anonymous No.391342]

>>391281
...and then its there like a little treasure trove for someone to find in the future (like the silver coins)!

[Anonymous No.391346]

Something like this: http://www.thinkgeek.com/product/855d/

I think there may even be one where the keyhole is one of the sockets. That's a nice deterrent to exploration...haha.

[Anonymous No.391354]

Behind a live electric outlet.
Behind the wainscot.
In a flour bag, with flour.
In a tube bed frame.
Among laundry.
Under a roofing shingle.
In a hole in a joist, properly disguised.
Taped behind hard to reach, hard to see plumbing.
In CD/DVD cases, covered with a CD/DVD.

[Anonymous No.391360]

What the fuck is wrong with you retards?

Get a floor safe. Bolt it to the floor and the wall at the bottom of your closet.

It'll take a crane to get it out. for srs

[Anonymous No.391362]

>>391084
If I saw an old VCR, especially one with cassettes nearby, I would be suspicious.

[Anonymous No.391364]

>>391267
I really like this idea.

[Anonymous No.391369]

these guys are drug dealers

[Anonymous No.391371]

>>391147
>Just wad it up and throw it on the floor with the rest of the trash.
You have trash just sitting around in your car? What the hell man.

[Anonymous No.391376]

>>391267
My bedroom is like that. It's in the basement and the ceiling isn't finished. I have access to the wiring, vents and all that. This is a really cool idea.

[Anonymous No.391394]

>>391279

Honestly, safes aren't very safe... I know some people, and when possible they would just hook a chain to a safe, attach it to the truck, and tear the safe and walls/windows right along with it. Probably not going to happen in an apartment complex... but if you have a house on an acre, and some cover, they sure as hell will.

[Anonymous No.391395]

Maybe hollow out a book and put the money inside?

[Anonymous No.391397]

>>391360

More like a crow bar and 20 seconds.

[WasbiEater No.391398]

I would suggest keeping a decoy hiding spot in your house that's someplace semi-obvious. If any body does actually go snooping through your stuff, they'll find that with two bucks, some change, possibly some out dated passwords and your pet rock collection and give up the hunt. After all, any kind of safe is the first thing that gets broken into.

[Anonymous No.391405]

>>391397
lol
are you serious? Do you think he meant wood floors?

[Anonymous No.391448]

Buy a time capsule and bury it in a yard or a piece of property that's unlikely to be developed (like under an overpass). Buy two, bury the important one under one with a bunch of unimportant junk. Even if someone sees you bury it and pits forth the effort to dig it up, they'll stop after they get to the first one.

Other good storage places are inside of walls, in curtain rods, and beneath light fixtures. Something hidden in a sump pump or the back of a toilet is unlikely to be found.

[Anonymous No.391457]

The old-school hiding place is of course behind a light switch. We have an unconnected one in our kitchen which makes a good hidey hole for cash/passports/etc. Plus you can either screw it in and keep it hidden, or jam a knife behind there and rip it out quickly.

We also have hollow interior doors which I'm considering doing something with. but haven't got around too yet.

[Anonymous No.391458]

You can hide maybe a small little bundle stuffed behind one of your wall socket's switchplates.

[Anonymous No.391459]

No hiding place is truly safe, because of the risk of natural disasters, house fire, etc.

Convert that cash into traveler's checks, then keep the numbers safely stored in the cloud or something. All you have to do is show ID, and you can use traveler's checks immediately.

[Anonymous No.391464]

>>391084
>Any good thorough thief would know to look in those places.
Seriously, how many of those are there? I bet there's not 1 in a 50,000 that would look at the top of every door in the place for a concealed hidey-hole.

Like the idea of the gold though, that's solid. I wouldn't convert all the money to gold, but the bulk of it for sure.

[Anonymous No.391465]

I put all my cash in an envelope taped to the top of a drawer of my drawing desk. the drawer is filled with cheap paints and brushes. In another room I have my nice PC desk that's nice and organized. Who's going to go through my paints and discover a very small enveloped taped flush down? If I were more paranoid I'd roll the money up in plastic and put it in one of the larger paint tubes.

[Anonymous No.391466]

Inside vents or other pre-existing structures in the home is a good start, just in case you get a savant burglar who knows what to look for in commercial hides and has the time to scour your place looking for them.

The old-school taped to the underside of the drawer isn't bad, but not on a drawer that comes out completely — guy could get lucky, yank the drawer out and toss it to one side and it lands upside down.

>Get a thin bit of masonite or similar stuff.
>Cut it to fit perfectly in your junk drawer.
>Now make a handle for the masonite.
>a "spilled" tube of superglue stuck permanently there...
Genius!

[Anonymous No.391467]

My all time favorite money hiding place was behind the horn button, inside my steering wheel.

[Anonymous No.391500]

> My all time favorite money hiding place was behind the horn button, inside my steering wheel.

genius! because we know cars never get stolen. and no one can possibly see you stuffing cash into your steering wheel coz glass is opaque.

[Anonymous No.391502]

>>391466
dam thats a good one

[Anonymous No.391510]

>>391464
Any burglar with half a brain would for sure. Like it doesn't take just five seconds to swipe your finger on top of a door or flip a drawer over that you were going to dump anyways.

[Anonymous No.391514]

>>391084
>take metal detectors to the walls
i dont know where you people live but that's just laughable. if you're not in some deep james bond shit or living in a 3trillion dollars mansion that shit will never happen.
and if you're dealing with those people they will check your genious vcr.

it's all a matter of time/potential gains ratio for any burglar.

[Anonymous No.391515]

>>390947

[Anonymous No.391516]

>>391467
>Car get stolen.
>Money also get stolen.
Nope, you're supposed to hide shit in a place or something that will not get robbed.

[Anonymous No.391519]

>>391084
>buy gold, and store the gold. It will hold its value (and likely increase in value).

[Anonymous No.391525]

I used to hide money in a curtain rod, similar to pic.

[Anonymous No.391526]

>>391519
and when you actually need it, good luck changing that useless gold into cash

[Anonymous No.391535]

>>391526
In a pinch any pawn or jewelry shop will give you cash for gold but you'll loose some money in the process. You really shouldn't do this but it's always an option.

[Anonymous No.391553]

>>391526
>Take out loan
>Use gold as collateral

[Anonymous No.391564]

I used to have a hollowed out "rusty" 20kg weight that was opened by twisting it, always placed at the bottom of the pile.

[Anonymous No.391577]

>>391564
Metal Scrapers will steal anything metal. Including metal plumbing pipes.

[Anonymous No.392068]

>in a plastic bag in an open cereal box in the pantry. Choose something noone wants to eat like...fiber bran old people kibble or some shit.
>under the sink in one of those stash jars that are inside of like bug spray or bottles of cleaner.
>Take couch cushion open it up to get to the foam, cut out a space in the foam, put money in space and reseal.
>Buy old boots from Goodwill the kind that look like shit, separate the sole of teh shoe from the rest of it, and put the money in between the top of teh rubber and the fabric of the shoe. Reseal.
>Inside the back cover of a clothes washing machine, or pull out a dishwasher/oven and hide it behind a that
>Put money in a bunch of extremely well sealed bundles of plastic bags. Heat up stovetop with some sort of fat that goes white/yellow and hard when cold. When hot the fat is liquidy and you can put stuff in it. When >cold it looks like cooking shit and noone can see in the pan beyond the fat. Works best in a messy kitchen.
>Inside a hollowed out deck of cards.
>inside a bottle of spices in the pantry.
>if you have a pet snake or tarantula...in his cage would be awesome.
> a hollowed out bar of soap that is resealed into its box and then put with bathroom supplies.

Just off the top of my head.
I used to be into spy stuff.

[Anonymous No.392072]

I don't need to hide anything in my home, but my PS2's expansion bay comes to mind.

[Anonymous No.392073]

>put valuables in bag
>shit in bag
>leave bag anywhere you want

Better yet

>perform above task
>place bag in a larger bag
>shit in larger bag

[xavior flora No.392075]

if you go to your local head shop they should have a safe that looks like a electrical plug but is hinges out on a pivit and rotates down when you remove the screw you can put a almost a half oz of refer in one of these and assuming your stashing large bills that a lot of loot.

[Anonymous No.392078]

>>392073
Some new ideas.

>tape whatever to the bottom of a shoe
>wear shoe
>step in dog shit

>shit pants
>bundle up valuables in pants
>throw shitty pants in clothes hamper

>make meatloaf
>eat 1/4 of meatloaf
>make mold of 3/4 meatloaf
>cast hollow meatloaf
>cut trap door in bottom of meatloaf
>paint up fake hollow 3/4 meatloaf
>put valuables in aforementioned meatloaf
>apply realistic paintjob to meatloaf
>eat rest of real meatloaf
>put false meatloaf in pan
>wrap in saran wrap
>store in fridge

[Anonymous No.392081]

>>392078
>find Star Wars prequels on VHS
>remove VHS guts, leaving hollow VHS shell
>put valuables in VHS shell
>put VHS shell into sleeve
>hide in plain sight

[Anonymous No.392086]

>Put cash/stash inside a ziploc bag
>Put bag inside a sock
>Place that inside another sock
>Get sock ball wet
>Wrap in butcher paper
>Write "Squirrel Meat" on paper
>Place in freezer

[Anonymous No.392088]

>>392086
Depending on where you are in the country, this may make it more likely to get stolen.

[Anonymous No.392107]

>>392073

OK I lol'd

[Anonymous No.392112]

>>392081
If i broke into a dude's house and saw some Star Wars VHSes, I would totally jack em. Especially these versions or older.
Jus sayin'

[Anonymous No.392115]

>>392112
I agree, but he wrote prequels. Meh.

[Anonymous No.392128]

>>391360
Yeah that works well when you rent an apartment.

I bought a Sentry Safe. Don't know how likely someone would run off with it. More worried about fire, or tornado

[ColsonCraft No.392157]

Hey, I happen to be a carpenter in WA who's been making secret compartments for a couple of years under the table. I can easily rig a secret drawer or cabinet in any piece of furniture, and I also make false books.

[Anonymous No.392159]

>>392157
Make infographics.

Dozens of them.

[ColsonCraft No.392161]

If there's anyone out there living in western WA near Seattle that wants a piece modified or just some advice on how to do mod specific items themselves, feel free to inquire at [e-mail].

[Anonymous No.392162]

You can always use this money to buy diamonds and ask doctor to place them under your arm skin.

[Anonymous No.392169]

>>391510

>Like it doesn't take just five seconds to swipe your finger on top of a door
There are ways to defeat that.

I don't buy that any typical burglar would do that anyway. I've seen plenty of places after they've been gone through by thieves and burglars and it sure didn't look like they were methodical and organised.

[Anonymous No.392170]

>>392072
PS2 would be a good lift item, even if they are obsolete now.

[Anonymous No.392172]

>>391514
>i dont know where you people live but that's just laughable.
My thoughts exactly. A burglar using a metal detector... FFS!

[Anonymous No.392184]

I have this link in another similar thread

http://www.mediafire.com/?834pbgw0oy6nomj

Basically its a PDF of various places to hide things, be it drugs, money or people. There's a few nice diagrams in it too.

[Anonymous No.392198]

>>390920
>saving money
>not even in a band
shit nigga, lrn2invest. taxes are gonna take more from you

[Anonymous No.392849]

[Anonymous No.392867]

>>392184
i was scanning the thread to see if anyone posted that already.

[Anonymous No.392883]

>>392075
>pivit
>refer
You seem like you have experience.

[Anonymous No.392898]

>>390920

? why do you have untrustworthy people in your house?

[Anonymous No.392961]

>>391526
I know right,
> powers out
> banks are down
> expect people to take gold in exchange for goods
> expect to get a good exchange rate because of course people are going to want 5 grams of gold for some water!

[nico No.393472]

heres my idea

[nico No.393482]

hers another idea

[nico No.393486]

inside a flesh light

[nico No.393484]

[Anonymous No.393511]

>>393486
hahahaha
>mfw

[Anonymous No.393514]

>>392161
>hey guys, I steal shit for a living, but I also do some woodworking on the side...

[Anonymous No.393527]

If you're actually worried about getting stolen from, you could just have 2 or 3 shitty-ish safes with bullcrap documents in them, and then actually important stuff hidden in the inside of a random coat that doesn't fit.
Or something.

[Anonymous No.393530]

>>393486
Until the burglar cuts his dick on your cash stash.

[Anonymous No.394156]

only good if you're a girl but for a year I was dating a nice waitress that hid her cash in a small slit in a padded bra

she was renting with 3 other bitches whom were always high and she knew they'd steal from her given the chance

but this old c-cup padded bra with a small slit in the side that she fit at least more than a grand in (because I saw at least 10 hundreds) it along with some gold jewelry

went to her place with her one day and the house was thrashed including her room, dressers opened, bed flipped, jewelry boxes empty (she only kept cheap walmart stuff in there), some clothing missing, just ruined

and then I see her go straight for a bra at the bottom drawer, which confused me until I saw she had shit in there

I didn't get the full story but one of the other bitches friends apparently broke in and stole shit to spite one of them.

[Anonymous No.394267]

>>392115
If I was a burglar, I'd steal them and burn them later as a favour.

[Anonymous No.394270]

>>393486
Those things have separate rubber insides and plastic outsides right? Roll your bills around the shaft of the inside and slip the outside plastic cover back on.

>apocalypse
>quickly open fleshlight
>find a handful of twenties covered in years worth of dried semen

[Anonymous No.394280]

Why the fuck don't any of you ghetto crackheads have a bank account?

[Anonymous No.394285]

>>394280

Yeah, that - or even a safe deposit box

[Anonymous No.394460]

>>391279
Well when you have a gun pointed to your head I doubt you will be denying them access.

[Anonymous No.394462]

>>391397
...trying to get a heavy safe out of a concrete floor
>20 seconds

[Anonymous No.394463]

unless you've got really nice doors and the thief is a nigger and he steals your doors

[Anonymous No.394464]

>>392068
You do know when cops search ur home they slash your couch cushions if they think u have drugs.

[Anonymous No.394481]

>>392161
I read your email as "Colon Craft"
nty

[Anonymous No.394486]

diaper lover, due to obvious reasons i have to hide them... inside my computer (fits 3)

[Anonymous No.394598]

Personally, i go down the Industrial route. I see this used in garages and furniture manufacturers in my area (blackburn, burnley, manchester UK)

Get the biggest fucking safe you can afford. Normally about three to four feet tall by two feet wide by two feet deep. Get some concrete and a concrete drill, and some rebar.

Drill four holes into the floor where you want your safe to go, then belt the rebar into the floor until about 12 inches is sticking out above ground level.

Heat the rebar with a blowtorch, then bend them over to a right angle about six inches above the ground. Now, make a wooden form larger than the base of the safe and pour three inches of concrete. When that's set, pour the next three inches and put the safe into the concrete while it's setting.

This shit is permanent, can be put anywhere, and will never break on you. Nobody can steal it, or pull it out. the only time i heard of this setup actually getting stolen, they took a 5-tonne forklift truck, forced one of the tines halfway underneath and literally tore it from the floor. It bent the forklift's tine, and blew the hydraulics on it. they found the safe 500 yards down the road, where it had apparently taken the back door off the van they'd tried to steal it in.

[Anonymous No.394600]

>>394598
To add to this (i didn't know if i'd hit the wordlimit)

For a home setup, i'd do this in the backyard. Yeah, it'll look a bit weird, but i guarantee you there is nobody out there who will be able to steal it. Ever.

Unless, of course, they pick the lock or guess the combination, but that's why you pay the good money

[Anonymous No.394642]

>put cash in old coat
>hang Coat in your coat closet

[Anonymous No.394641]

>>391084
>op says he needs to be able to get cash in hand quickly
>buy gold

[Anonymous No.394651]

>put money in plastic bag/envelope
>put it under a large throw rug or the carpet itself

[Anonymous No.394653]

>>394642
Did that once. Someone borrowed the coat without me knowing about it, and I ended up loosing $200, when the "old coat they wanted to use for a art project' got destroyed.

[Anonymous No.394664]

>>392849
Hey I have the same type of ceiling, its horrible and I hate it,

[Anonymous No.394670]

> I could also put it in the safe, but boy is that obvious and the first place a thief will check.

Which is why you buy a safe, so they take that and leave the hidden treasures.

[Anonymous No.394674]

>>394598
>>394600
>they pick the lock
>guess the combination
>or give them the combination

[Anonymous No.394708]

>>394670
You'll want to have something valuable in the safe. If crooks know you got valuables like gold and it's not in the safe, they'll keep looking. The old phrase "don't keep all your eggs in one basket" comes to mind here. Put some stuff in the safe, hide some more, put some more in a safety deposit box. Never leave too many valuables in one location.

>>394598
I'm tempted to find an unopened safe someone is selling. Preferably one that can't be cracked and they've lost the combination to. Then build an auto-safe dialer with an arduino and after a few hours I'll have a brand new opened safe, with combination, and maybe some bonus stuff inside it.

[Anonymous No.394874]

>>394653
hehe, i used to work at a thrift shop, and at one point we had a guy come in who had just got back from vacation, only to find that his wife had donated one of his shirts...that had $900 in the pocket. he, and we, never found it.

[Anonymous No.394894]

>>391519

Gold is a stupid investment right now because the market price is so inflated that every ounce you buy you'll lose about 300-500$ on the spot trying to re-sell it.

[Anonymous No.394907]

>>394674
Fill it with beer, put actual money in the house somewhere. They go to raid safe for moneys, find beer.

[Anonymous No.394934]

>>393511
>mfw no face

[Anonymous No.394986]

>>394464
I do. The idea is very small cuts in the cushions. Like a cigar sized or Memory card sized hiding spot

[Anonymous No.395013]

>>394894
yes, but the fun bit is it's likely to continue to inflate for awhile since the economy sucks so hard. silver coins'd be more useable, thugh, assuming the world goes to hell in a handbasket...

[Anonymous No.395113]

I pulled back the carpet and cut the concrete floor to put in one of those floor safes. The people in the apartment below were not happy. I didn't think the saw was that loud. Some people are just thin skinned.

[Anonymous No.395131]

>>390951
lol, are you 15 or something?

[Anonymous No.395188]

http://wehaslinks.com/ebooks/10245 try these guys.

[Anonymous No.395234]

I was a cable guy for a while and I always thought a surefire way to hide your stuff is to find conduit in the walls. Put your money or whatever around or in a metallic enclosure, small obviously, and push it through conduit in the walls. The only way to get it out is to wall fish, but you can get one with a magnet on the end. You can put it in the conduit and push it up quite a ways, 3 or 4 feet in a decoy outlet. Obviously no burglar will want to spend time wall fishing and most people have no idea what wall fishing even is. If you want to be really thorough about it you can even hide the conduit behind drywall.

[Anonymous No.395259]

>>394894

noone would sell gold below spot price. fuck, just offering gold for spot price some cunt would buy it off you straight away.

[Anonymous No.395263]

Some tips from someone who has robbed, been robbed and knows robbers.

Don't put your money in the freezer. Robbers who are usually junkies looking for money will also go steal food 9 times out of 10. A parcel labelled 'meat' or an envelope/sock/container hiding your money in the freezer is just begging to be opened. The freezer is one of the first places we look. Cereal boxes are also not safe. I will scatter your baked bean cans onto the floor listening for a can that doesn't sound like it has beans inside. As for making noise, it is a time/place/how desperate am I.

Another place is your underwear drawer. We will rummage through it and feel the tops/bottoms of the drawers for hidden envelopes. We'll grope your socks for hidden cash and pocket your panties while you're there.

Cupboards and wardrobes where you've got a shoebox or anything will be opened and thrown across the room. We don't give a fuck, we don't have time to put things back as we found them, we're in and out looking for money or things we can sell.

Speaking of selling, we will take any electronic items like dvd players, tvs, whatever we can carry or get away with. An old vcr player that doesn't go along with your new bluray and playstation is just a sore thumb. I will steal your dvds and if you're hiding cash in them, bonus for me.

I will go through your bookshelf and throw those things around hoping to shake out some money. I will also smash your old photoframes in desperation to find the money stashed behind your photos of your mum.

I will look under mattresses, I will take anything of value that you may have hidden money in (electronic devices) and things I can sell. I will look under things, and I will pry open vents and things if I must. I will take a shit in your toilet after checking the cistern for hidden cash or drugs because some people are just too obvious.

[Anonymous No.395264]

>>395263
Don't put your money in places that your family/friends may stumble across it. Old clothes pockets, stuff that may be considered junk like shaving cream cans, ect. Don't put it near or around bins in case someone mistakes it for rubbish and throws it out. Children's bedrooms people usually think is a brilliant idea, until yourtalented /diy/erdiscovers the money for themselves.

Places I may not look (but don't count on it); clocks, lamps, pipes, air conditioners. My family always stood by an airtight container/bucket buried in the garden with mulch and whatever on top to hide it. Access it only if you have a private property or at night so nobody knows it is there. You will have to remember where you put it. It is a common thing in which to hide drugs in case of raids, and isn't always buried on your property, but hidden elsewhere.

[Anonymous No.395270]

my bipolar grandpa lived poor his whole life. he was a good carpenter and owned a tiny house by a big pond.

after he passed away, someone in the family found money in a hidden stash spot behind a photo of the virgin mary. then they found like $70k stuffed behind the door frames of the kitchen and bathroom.

no one had any idea he even had that money. they were gonna sell the house but decided to demolish it or something, or they never would have known about it. even his best friends and siblings and my uncle and dad had no clue. grandpa didn't trust banks because jews. lol. I loved him so much. cheers grandpa.

the best way to hide your money is to not let people know you have it, and to have manic states that make you an energetic idea man who re-frames doors in his house in the middle of the night

[Anonymous No.395271]

>>393486
This. Especially if you don't want cops fucking with it in a search, cops and other officials stop searching any area that's got something to do with sex toys. I have several anecdotes to back this theory up.

[Anonymous No.395272]

first house I rented when i was 17 was owned by a realtor. he had obviously just had someone clean the place and paint it before I moved in. they left an old wooden workbench in the garage that was in really bad shape, and there were boards on the ceiling that had baby food jars screwed to them filled with screws nails nuts, and misc. the realtor said I could throw the stuff out, if I didn't want it.
first night there i'm checking the place out I open the attic, find a ton of christmas stuff from the 1920s, behind that was 11 paintings, a set of silver, and a shotgun-pistol legal antique, not sawed off. needless to say my rent wasnt a problem. as if that 20k weren't enough, when i took down the babyfood jars and boards off the ceiling in the garage, there were more guns gold silver and stones in the rafters.
something told me there was even more in the house, so I went to the realtor, and made a deal to buy the house instead of renting. I didn't have bad credit, I just didn't have credit, so they wanted 20% down instead of 5% that wasn't a problem, but i worried about explaining where the money came from. nobody ever asked. I didn't want to trash the place, plus I was living in the house, so i decided to remodel one room at a time, and check the walls floor etc.

[Anonymous No.395279]

pulled up the floor boards in the living room, and sure enough some of them were cut funny and not nailed, they slid into place interlocking. in a compartment underneath was more gold, and some papers which told me this had been there since the 1930s. Contacted an attorney, and he assured me that it was all mine, which wasn't exactly true, but I hadn't told him just how much I had found dollar wise. but luckily i soon had an accountant who got me squared away in investments, and taxes that i needed to pay.

there is a lot of space in the walls of a house. with wooden walls instead of plaster you can hide a door or an entire room. you could have a basement under your house and not even know it

[Anonymous No.395285]

>>395279

how much gold did you find

[Anonymous No.395290]

>>395270
Same thing happened with my grandpa. Hidden behind bricks next to the fireplace and behind paintings.


Now I know why he never made fires

[Anonymous No.395292]

13 judenpounds.

[Anonymous No.395295]

>>395292

the fuck is a juden pound

[Anonymous No.395300]

>>395285
I did some research on the house, and found that the person who had lived there came from Finland, but nobody speaks that language. He also owned some ship, or fishing, or whaling business. They had no relatives, when they passed away so the state sold the house.

It was a lot, and no it wasn't from Europe, the gold was US the diamonds were European cut, but that would have been typical back then.

[Anonymous No.395319]

>>390920
try zip-lock bags and putting them in the back part of the toilet. same goes for if have a fish tank.

[Anonymous No.395726]

>>395263

[Anonymous No.395737]

>>395726
Good, but that last part: Nobody looks when a car alarm goes off, they just curse and ignore it.

[Anonymous No.395782]

>>395737
It depends on the car alarm, and how often it 'cry's wolf'. Where I live now, I would check. Back in the 80's there was a car who's alarm would go off 3 or 4 times a week, parked across the street. Those of us who live nearby would have been throwing money out the window and cheering to encourage anyone stealing that car !!

[Anonymous No.395783]

>>394598

Wassup blackburn friend, oswaldtwistle here.

[Anonymous No.395844]

I bought a fireproof safe with a hidden compartment. Enjoy your money being burned in a house fire if it may happen.

I keep my safe in my garage attic though packed behind a bunch of Christmas boxes. Who wants to steal a box of Christmas lights?

Has all important documents, car titles, papers for my taxes, etc. Also about $5k and a few credit cards ($5k max total) in case of emergency.

[Anonymous No.396665]

>Bedframe made of solid maple
>screws keep toppers together
>drill bigger hole, deeper, carve out the rest to make a little cavity in the frame
>put fat, short screw on topper
>stuff roll in plastic bag with the ol' string+washer bit
>unscrew topper at any time, use magnet and string to get money out

Seriously, no one give a shit about those faggoty little toppers.

[Anonymous No.396686]

Take off the handles of your door, take out the locking mechanism, open is up, stick some money in there (assuming older doors with a 1/2 foot tall locks)
If you have a wardrobe with a bar for hold your shirts and coats, use a hollow bar, rolle up some bills in there.
Hollow out an old deodorant can, keep it in site.
Keep it in a sealable plastic bag in a sock on the washing line (one with a canopy, preferably).
In the frame of a family photo.
Inside a bag under compost in a hanging basket outside.
That's about all I have

[Anonymous No.396737]

>>394907
get a cheap floor safe
place it in a not too good hiding spot
fill it with fake replica coins
add one 6 pack of beer to the safe
add a note that says "Congratulations on finding my safe. Enjoy the gold coins and have a beer on me. Sorry if it's a little warm. P.S. Only one of the coins is real."

Be sure that none of the coins are authentic. You now have a perfect distraction that will keep the crooks occupied for at least an hour while getting them drunk at the same time.

[Anonymous No.396821]

I keep my stuff inside a power junction box, behind a stack of old boxes in my garage.

The only annoying part is having to move the boxes every time i want to open it.

[Anonymous No.396849]

>>391084
Nobody is going to do all of that searching unless they know what they're looking for. Someone who robs a house will steal electronics, and might toss a jewelry box or some dresser drawers for hidden cash.

[Anonymous No.396881]

If you have a slat bed, then making some hollow slats is always a viable option. A bed itself is usually not going to get stolen, and they are useless to steal without the bed.

[Anonymous No.396883]

>>390920
Get one of these, and put it with the rest of your cleaning stuff.

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B008CTFY16/ref=as_li_ss_tl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=390957&creativeASIN=B008CTFY16&linkCode=as2&tag=search_results-20

[Anonymous No.396885]

>>390920
>Take old hard drive
>Empty out all inside parts
>Put Money in But top back on
>Stick in computer rig
Profit

[Anonymous No.396886]

>>396885
10/10

[Anonymous No.396888]

>>396885
Because a thief wouldn't steal a computer, and the feds would probably leave it alone too. Brilliant.

[Anonymous No.396898]

>>396885
Good except the last part. Don't put it in the computer, label it "BROKEN" and toss it in a closet.

[Anonymous No.396906]

>>396898
Even if they do steal it, when they try and mount it they'll discover it really is broken and probably toss it in the trash. You won't have your money, but they won't either. Last laugh is yours.

[Anonymous No.396917]

>>391154

I had mine buried outside in a double ziploc.

[Anonymous No.396940]

Behold, for I am going to reveal a masterful hiding location.
It is fire resistant, flood proof, and virtually undetectable.

1. Get one of these (pic) and clean it out.
2. Double ziplock your wad and put it inside the clean cup. Make sure to compress it, so as to avoid any floating.
3. Submerge in the back bowl of your toilet.

For added protection you can get some blue pebbles (like the ones for fish tanks) and bury your wad.
Even if you hire a plumber and forget to take the cup out, he'll never suspect the humbly forgotten blue toilet water dispenser.

[Anonymous No.396941]

>>394462
You've onviously never watched Burn Notice

[Anonymous No.396953]

>>396941
> Implying someone would want to do that for $1,300

Honestly, a safe bolted to the floor or set in concrete is going to be safe enough and affordable enough for what you need to protect.

[Anonymous No.397012]

Hey OP! Spend $1000 on a safe to hide your $1000!

[Anonymous No.397025]

I taped a metal lock box behind my headboard on my bed.
My bed frame weighs about 700 pounds and it is butted up against a dark corner so I am not too worried.

I also have rectangular tubing to an old steel desk that has little pop off cap covers to hide the inside of the tubing, that works well.

I cut out a door handle with a circular drill and can insert shit and glue it back and paint over it.

I can also put a few hundred in old 6 LED flashlights I have laying around.

Hiding shit under baseboards is a good place too, there is a 1/2"x12" slot that runs everywhere if you have carpet that is a good place for shit.I prefer the under door method to putting valuable, you can use more and you have to remove the door to get too it.

[Anonymous No.397027]

Put it in an obvious piece of worthless junkmail like an oil change reminder from the dealership. Toss on backseat floor of car with similar.

[Anonymous No.397039]

Actually i started hiding money and jewelry in my old dvds no robber would look at those since bluray and such i usually put them in my favorite or sentimental dvds to keep track

[sage No.397066]

I put my stuff in a 3/4 empty peanut butter jar with a plastic bag glues inside

[Anonymous No.397070]

>>390920
If you have enough knowledge of carpentry you can hide nearly any thing in a piece of furniture.

[Anonymous No.398341]

in a basement utility room set up a fake breaker panel. run wire out of it up into the ceiling joists and/or into a nearby finished wall so it looks like the wires are going somewhere but really they just end when out of sight. hide yer stuff in the panel... usually need to unscrew 4 screws to open the panel to get to space behind the breakers. would guess that most thieves wouldn't be down in a util room checking the house wiring system when there are so many other more obvious places to check first.
along same idea lines. maybe see if there is any spare room in a water heater or water softening system.
there is a lot of spare room in a furnace down in the blower area (not where the burners are!); build a smallish box that looks somewhat like it belongs in that part of the furnace and stick it in there; might not be good for paper item long term tho' would really get dried out and brittle.

[Anonymous No.398343]

>>398341
furnace idea. in the bottom chamber near the blower - the cold return air enters here and it blown upwards so shouldn't have issue with your items getting burnt up.

[Anonymous No.398344]

false back panel in an upper kitchen cabinet? behind a ton of canned goods. thief desperate *might* bother to check all the cans for fakes containing valuables but probably will not notice that the cabinet depth is off by an inch or so. especially an upper cabinet which is harder to reach.

[Anonymous No.398345]

>>391371
That nigga dirty as fuck, yo

[Anonymous No.398347]

>>391362
No you wouldn't.. stop lying

[Anonymous No.398348]

if you are living in a old house that has old old windows that use the cords and weights to assist in open the window sashes you might be able to stash small things attached to the sash cords inside the weight pockets. some old windows of this type have an access door in the frame of the window to allow the sash cord to be replaced if it breaks. you can access the cord and the weight through the access this panel.

[Anonymous No.398352]

some homes have access panel usually in a closet that gives access to the back of a bathtub/shower so the pipes can be fixed etc. lots of room in there for hiding stuff and usually not a quick area to access. usually need to remove several screws first. something a thief on a tight time schedule probably won't have time for.
maybe use this hiding spot along with the fake water pipe idea; even if thief finds and opens the panel all he will see is pipes. some real and some fake.

[Anonymous No.398354]

>>398352
my grandparent's house had this. and to further make it tedious there was and second panel inside the area that the first panel allowed access to. when my grandmother sold the house and I was helping moving all the stuff out I dug all the crap out of the closet, opened the first panel and was about to open the second panel but my dad said there was probably nothing all the way in there and we didn't have time/needed to leave so I never did get to check behind the second panel. sometimes still wonder if ol' gramps did hide something back there (he had already passed and grandma didn't have a clue).

[Anonymous No.398356]

if house has a crawlspace could easily hide stuff waaaay in the back. even better if crawlspace is packed with junk and not well lit. thief isn't going to be crawling around in a dark dusty filled with junk crawlspace on the hopes of something good down there.

[Anonymous No.398378]

Take off the doorknob and there is enough space between the 2 sides the knob and the latch to store paper money.

[Anonymous No.398403]

>>391151
unless they take the drawer out to dumb it on the bed

[Anonymous No.398428]

What if there's a fucking fire?

[Anonymous No.398449]

>>390920
if you have a twist to install shower rod untwist it and put it in the bar twist back on. In case of fire take bar with you.

[Anonymous No.398454]

>>391362
Why? Lots of people still use VCR's. I'm one of them, and everybody I know has either a DVD player and a VCR, or a combo DVD/VCR machine.

[Anonymous No.398461]

This still going? You'd think we were a bunch of devious bastards who like the idea of hiding stuff. Oh wait.

[Anonymous No.398472]

they make these things

[Anonymous No.398541]

>>398472
these things are pretty cool, i tried making one myself once, lets just say between the fact that aerosol cans never completely empty and are pressurized, that you should think twice before trying to open one with a can opener

[Anonymous No.398563]

>>398428
fire isn't the primary concern, I think ideas here are to hide things from being found. really, how often does a fire burn down your house. its actually pretty darn rare.

[Anonymous No.398575]

>>398563
There are 114,761,359 house holds in the us. In 2010 there were 362,100 fires in those houses. I'm not worried about the 0.31% chance my house will burn down when the robbery rates are over four times that at 1,596,008 or 1.39% in 2009.

[Anonymous No.398576]

>>398575
In fact, if I reworked those Burglary rates for my area, NYC, it would be even higher.

[Anonymous No.398581]

>>398472
Yeah.. I use on of the Ajax ones like this and just keep it under my kitchen sink. Nobody looks under the sink for valuables!

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B0009Z9TVW/ref=as_li_ss_tl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=390957&creativeASIN=B0009Z9TVW&linkCode=as2&tag=search_results-20

[Anonymous No.398582]

inside of atalented /diy/er#039;s toy? thief won't bother taking some stupid plastic toy.

[Anonymous No.398583]

>>398582
lol, ooops forgot about that forbidden word...

[noko No.398584]

IT soo easy.
If you have a drawer that never moves. build a fucking box under attached.

If you have dryer, build a fucking box inside insulate that bitch.

If you have a spare older tv. Build afucking box it.

If you have a rag sex doll..build afuckng smaller box in it.


gaaaadamit you can find soo many dam place.

[Anonymous No.398637]

there's always the ol' tried and true mason jar buried in the yard. or multiple mason jars buried in the yard...

[Anonymous No.398665]

>>396940
Yea, he might even be so kind as to throw it away for you.

[Anonymous No.398667]

>>398665
how many DIY folks couldn't fix their own toilet? I mean what really BREAKS with a toilet. any DIY guy could replace the flapper and the float valve in less then 20 minutes. fixed. no need to call a plumber.

[Anonymous No.398675]

>>396737

Get a bottle capper and open the bottles, add something to them, then cap them back up. Either use a cap that's a close match or carefully remove the caps so you can re-use them.

[Zyzz !.B0tdY9xNk No.398743]

>>398675
A bic lighter is a great way to remove the caps. If you can get good at it they wont bend at all and can be put back on the bottle as if nothing happened.

[Anonymous No.398750]

boil some water.

[Anonymous No.398760]

>used to keep about $500 in an old prescription bottle at the bottom of a bag of used fap tissues
>grandmother is a clean freak who routinely invades space and cleans out every room in the house
>throws away whole bag

not only did she discover my bag of fap tissues, but she also tossed $500 in the garbage.

Just keep your money in the bank, retards.

[Anonymous No.398777]

take the cover off your main electric box and put it in there (lots of room in the bottom). if you have a wall mounted mirror, take the mirror off the wall cut a square out of the sheet rock make a square 2 x 4 frame smaller than the mirror put money in and remount mirror. put bills in behind picture frames. put money in freezer bags wrap hamburg around it wrap it in freezer paper and freeze it. open your pillow and stuff cash in it the sew it back up.pull up floor boards under a rug and put it there.

[Anonymous No.398780]

>>398760
you deserved to lose that money because you saved your fap tissues, freak.

[Anonymous No.398793]

You guys are overthinking it.
buy a teddy bear, put it near your bed, shove bills into it.
Works even better if you have a child

[Anonymous No.398923]

rig up a bomb of oven cleaner and caustic soda in a distraction safe, place the safe in the wall behind a picture and leave the picture ajar on hinges, thieves break in steal your safe and stuff then you play the old waiting game

got my bag stolen at the weekend from my van, im strongly considering masquearading a makeshift bomb as a keyring or rape alarm so when they pull it it blows off some of their fingers

[Anonymous No.398950]

>>398541
lol, leared that as atalented /diy/erwhen I thought it would be a good idea to trow "empty" paint cans in a fire

>>398581
I like this one too
http://www.amazon.com/Wall-Outlet-Safe/dp/B000SM3NRW/ref=sr_1_3?s=hi&ie=UTF8&qid=1360977216&sr=1-3&keywords=wall+socket+safe

[Anonymous No.398951]

>>398950
>atalented /diy/
wtf, meant as atalented /diy/er

[Anonymous No.398954]

I have $1400~ inside a hollowed out sega genesis, under a pile of wires. I just hope any thief that breaks in isnt looking for old ass consoles

[Anonymous No.398958]

>>398951
I grinned slightly. That word is filtered. :3

[Anonymous No.399413]

>>398954
I'd still be worried about them taking it. I don't wanna put the money in anything at all that someone might take without even knowing there is money in it.

I had an idea about opening up the package to a bar of soap, putting the money in alone with the soap and then resealing it. It seems unlikely to me that anyone is going to steal soap, especially if its like one of 4 packages.

[Anonymous No.399438]

Guys, I have a book about hidden places, I could share it if anyone wants it.

[Anonymous No.399499]

>>399438
Please do

[Anonymous No.399504]

>>399438

>Goes to scan book
>Accidentally made a hollowed book out if it

[Anonymous No.399506]

Never place something you don't want to move in something someone can move.
You never know what a burglar would look for in your house so here is my favorite spots : inside the vent in the toilets, under the floor (there's a loose part under my bed), inside the wall, behind a fake plug and last but not least, inside the lamp in my garage, since it's been out for a long time.
Have fun.

[Anonymous No.399523]

>>391279

pft that's what i thought. i had my shit stored in a 500lb safe and what do you know! the thieves stole the whole damn thing. i don't even know if they ever managed to break into it, but now it's gone.

[Anonymous No.399527]

>>398403
this is why you tape it above the drawer

[Anonymous No.399555]

>>399499
k here ya go anon
http://www.mediafire.com/view/?nn8gn2nb9n7680a

[Anonymous No.399854]

>>390947
i once hid some porno comics in and airport vent for 7 years....just for luta....

they were still there 7 years alter in perfect condition...the air flow stopped them molding

[Anonymous No.399871]

ITT: come up with genius places to hide things and shit on them by creating unrealistic scenarios in which the spots can be found easily.

[Anonymous No.399872]

[Anonymous No.399990]

>>399872
those things are crap. The reviews on Amazon alone will prove you'll just end up losing stuff in your wall.

http://www.amazon.com/TVTimedirect-DS-3-Hidden-Wall-Safe/product-reviews/B000RJ1ZRG/?_encoding=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=390957&linkCode=ur2&showViewpoints=1&tag=search_results-20

[Anonymous No.399997]

>>399854
does everyone do the porn thing when they go on business trips? Like 5 times i've been at the airport, and I go to throw something in a trashcan, and there's porn mags in it. Like they threw them away before they got on a plane. not a few magazines but several, I imagine more than one person contributed.

[Anonymous No.401090]

hide in sink cabinet

[Anonymous No.401091]

false panel in drawer hiding secret compartment.

[Anonymous No.401106]

>Leave a deliberate trail to the basement
>Through a couple of rooms and a climb through a small tunnel later they will find a sacrificial stone the house is built upon
>tfw
>Dried blood all over the place
>Mounds of stuff dug down in the sand
>Disturbing the mounds will trigger small holes from the stone, spewing out aqua regia in the small space
>Thief ded
>Add another mound
Half-true story

[Anonymous No.401130]

hide yer stuff outside the house, in public places (for fun and profit)!

[Anonymous No.401134]

you can hide escaped slaves in this one.

[Anonymous No.401135]

the old fake bathroom tile trick.

[Anonymous No.401147]

>>391084
Not OP, I live in Argentina,aka whiteland, VCR players are still valuable. Fuck this nigger country

[Anonymous No.401193]

>>395263
Thanks dude, much appreciated
just so you know all that text isn't goint to waste

[Anonymous No.401201]

test
a talanted /diy/er
atalented
a talented /diy/er

[Anonymous No.401214]

>>401147

Get a phonograph?

Big, bulky, and if it looks like crap/broken it probably won't be mistaken as an antique.

[Anonymous No.401239]

>>391216
This.

This is pretty fucking brilliant.

[Anonymous No.401251]

>>401134
Lies. That one was just for booze during prohibition. It's in NY somewhere.

[Anonymous No.401362]

I thought it would be a cool idea to create a false bottom to an empty bleach container, then stick your stuff in there and fill the top part with water so it still has liquid weight, but I'm afraid some burglar would try to do laundry or use the bleach to make meth. Do you even use bleach to make meth? I don't know.

[Anonymous No.401391]

Why are you trying to save cash? It is literally the most worthless thing on the fucking planet.

You want to feel your hard earned savings isn't wasted on meaningless shit or some crackheads habit?

BUY A GODDAMN GUN SAFE.

[Anonymous No.401417]

hide entire rooms.

[Anonymous No.401472]

>>401130
Anyone have a link to this? I can't find a torrent.

[Anonymous No.401487]

>>401417
ENTER AT YOUR OWN PERIL
PAST THE BOLTED DOORS
WHERE IMPOSSIBLE THINGS MAY HAPPEN
THAT THE WORLD HAS NEVER SEEN BEFORE

[Anonymous No.401656]

>>401130
You're welcome

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1893626466/ref=as_li_ss_tl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=390957&creativeASIN=1893626466&linkCode=as2&tag=search_results-20

[Anonymous No.401723]

Shit, if you're afraid a nigger will break into your house, and you wanna save your money, you know what you do? You put the money in a book. Cause niggers don't read. Books are like kryptonite to a nigger. 'Here's a book.' 'NOOOOOOOOO! NOOOOOOOOOOOOO! Not a book!

[Anonymous No.402106]

Everyone here is neglecting the fact that your house might burn down. Personally, I buried a sealed mason jar full of cash adjacent to a relatives grave. I know where it's at, I know where to find it, no one is going to find it. And since its near but not on top of the grave, grave robbers wouldn't find it. Also, if I needed a grand to get out of doge, I may not be able to get into my house to get it.

[Anonymous No.402124]

>>402106
>Everyone here is neglecting the fact that your house might burn down
in which case you still have your bank monies
>I buried a sealed mason jar full of cash adjacent to a relatives grave
fact that it's your relatives grave obv makes it ok to be digging around in graveyard
>And since its near but not on top of the grave, grave robbers wouldn't find it
good thinking - don't want those grave robbers gettin your lewt as a bonus while they dig up 6 feet of earth and hoist the lid off a concrete burial vault all in an effort to get great aunt edna's costume jewelry

[Anonymous No.402135]

>>391362
People still have their memories on VCR's

[Anonymous No.402597]

>>401251
that was a joke.

[Anonymous No.402600]

another book on hiding stuff.

[Anonymous No.402601]

>>402601
whee

[Anonymous No.402650]

>>397039
>no robber would look at those since bluray
Are you fucking kidding me?

How many people who have switched to blu ray do you think go around robbing places.

I'm from an upper middle class family and I own 1 blu ray.

My cousin goes to a high school which costs $15,000 base rate (before camps, sports, music etc) and they have a 5 TV's in their house.... guess how many blu ray players they have.

0.

Not everyone is as obsessed with tech as the average anon.

Most burgalers aren't well off enough to turn their nose up at a dvd.

If it can be put in a backpack and sold, it's stolen.

DVD's can sell for at least $2-$5 to a mate. Not to mention ebay/kids on the street/pawn shops.

>inb4 bragging, I'm poor. My family are standard middle class mother fuckers. Just painting a scene.

[Anonymous No.402686]

[Anonymous No.402699]

>>402650
Truth, I still don't have a bluray player.

[Anonymous No.402703]

>>402650
People don't rob other people for items to use, they rob them for items to sell.

Current value of a blu-ray player: >$100USD
Current value of a VHS player: $0.00USD

[Anonymous No.402729]

>>398675
Consider for a moment how many teenage kids break in to steal booze.

this is a terrible idea.

[Anonymous No.402742]

One thing I need to add in here since I dont see anyone mentioning it

Toilet tanks. I used to live in an off campus college residence with semi-public washrooms, and the washroom across from my door I kept a spare key in one of the tanks.

a toilet is a pretty simple device, and you should be able to put say, a small mason jar inside without anyone noticing. Just make sure to weigh it down with coins or something.
You dont want the water to pull the items towards the opening where the pipe comes out

[Anonymous No.402782]

>>402601
fuck

[Anonymous No.402799]

>>395271
I keep all of my sex toys in a clear plastic tub at the bottom of my gun safe.
I'm required by law to allow police to conduct random checks of my safe, and it's always hilarious the first time an officer sees the inside of the safe.

[Anonymous No.402801]

>>397039
That's incredibly stupid. Thieves just grab anything that they might be able to turn into cash

[Anonymous No.402810]

>>391086
I'm saving to buy shit that costs a lot/ rainy day cash. It's currently just in a padlocked trunk at the foot of my bed. But a few places I can think to hide cash:
inside an empty chapstick container
in a picture frame
old deodorant stick
inside lots of things really

anyway, here's info on how to make a hollowed out book

[Anonymous No.402842]

>>402799
>I'm required by law to allow police to conduct random checks of my safe

Where do you live?

[Anonymous No.402844]

>>402842
Melbourne, Australia.

[Anonymous No.402846]

>>394653
I bought a really nice barbour jacket (wax jacket) from a charity shop for £10, to wear when I go fishing. Had owned it for about 3 months before I even realised it had an inside pocket - which on closer inspection contained £600 in £50's, held together by an 18 carat gold money clip.

[Anonymous No.402886]

Hide it in a dildo with herpes medication nearby.
If you have diabeetus, put a fake bottom on your hazardous waste disposal.
Put it behind doorstops.
Put it in an alarm clock.
Will think of more soon.

[Anonymous No.402904]

I put a secret compartment under the pavers in my patio with some cash for a rainy day. Of course an actual rainy day is fine becasue its in a mason jar.

[Anonymous No.402925]

>>391394

[Zzk No.402930]

>>391084
>mfw I still have my VCR
>I use it often
>>401147
This nigger knows what I'm talking about.

[Anonymous No.402969]

you just need to live like a hoarder so that no thief will ever be able to look through all your shit, duh.

[Anonymous No.402976]

1. Be a nasty mother fucker.
2. Collect bodily fluids in jars.
3. Not on every jar.
4. Hide them all in a secret compartment.

People would not be suspicious, as you clearly have reason to hide this stuff, and also not be curious enough to poke around.

[Anonymous No.403771]

Nothing complicated, roll it up and stick it in a roll of string and toss it in with a pile of junk. You can fit a lot of $ in it, and good for easy access.

[Anonymous No.403775]

>>391398
my dad used to tell me about someone he knew who did something similar. He had about $2000 buried in a jar somewhere, but about another foot down there was another jar with like $10,000 or something. As soon as you find the first jar, you'll just take it and run.

[Anonymous No.403776]

>>403771
Or stick it in a toilet paper roll. Then put that roll at the bottom of a VERY large toilet paper roll basket. Seriously, who's going to look in toilet paper for cash?

[Anonymous No.403777]

>>401147
Cipayo

[Anonymous No.403817]

>>392849
condoms break down, other than that not a terrible idea.

the only reason they last like 4 years is they're in a package, keeping their moisture. They'll dry and crack apart

[Anonymous No.403821]

>>395319
I covered this above, and you blatantly ignored the dangers of doing exactly what you're talking about.

the bags will clog open the valve and cause a flood, causing water damage.

Its a good hiding spot but you need to know what the fuck you're doing.

[Anonymous No.403826]

>>391084
>use the money to buy gold, and store the gold

there is a fee for paying some one to authenticate the gold once it has left the bank. Also , if you buy gold its on record that you own it.

[Anonymous No.403830]

>>391154
I did this too, but got busted when my mom decided to clean the furnace ducts and got busted.

[Anonymous No.403837]

>>403826

not if you buy the gold from a reputable mint. just buy their bar/coins and itll have their stamp on it and you wont need to get it authenticated.

also i duno about america but in australia your info is only recorded if you buy more than 5 grand of precious metals at one time. bypass that by buying it off someone that isnt a dealer.

[Anonymous No.403846]

>>403837
http://www.zerohedge.com/news/tungsten-filled-10-oz-gold-bar-found-middle-manhattans-jewelry-district

[Anonymous No.403921]

>>403821
if the flapper gets stuck open the toilet will just continue ro "run"... the tank will keep filling and the bowl will keep draining. no overflow, no flood, just wasting a lot of water. if the valve (with the float) gets stuck open the tank will fill until the top of the flapper tube. once the level reaches that it will drain into the bowl which will drain into the drain pipe. again, no overflow, no flood, just wasted water.

[Anonymous No.403926]

The question that hasn't been asked: what do you think will happen that you won't be able to get to an ATM, but will need $1000+?

Inb4 civil insutrect or some shit, Obama coming to take you off to the FEMA camp or whatever, because in that case a US dollar is the worst asset you could be holding.

[Anonymous No.403927]

>>403837
I bought a few 100 ounce bars of silver in Canada when silver was going for ~$6/ounce. I sold for $37/ounce, and no capital gains since the transaction was direct product for lucre.

I bought from a market and sold to a bank (several years later), all in Canada.

[Anonymous No.403956]

>>403926
Lets say you are wanted for murder. Maybe ou did it, maybe you didn't. I don't care. You need cash to hit the road and get out of town. You going to an ATM? No cause your account is frozen and they got cameras.

[Anonymous No.403970]

>>402124
lol not aunt edna's jewelry!

[Anonymous No.403971]

>>402686
Dodson! We got Dodson here!

[Anonymous No.403973]

>>393530
lol

[Anonymous No.403976]

>>391467

That's where I used to keep my weed

[Anonymous No.404096]

So if you have a house fire, you'll be found dead because you were trying to take the door off the hinges when you were overcome by the smoke...

[Anonymous No.404126]

>391084
>2013
>Central banks across the globe have already begun bringing their gold home and are frantically hoarding anything they can get ahold of
>Lets compete with said banks and buy a spec of gold at an unbelievable high price (it's likely to not only hold but increase in value)

[Anonymous No.404334]

>>402686
http://www.amazon.com/Barbasol-Shaving-Cream-Diversion-Safe/dp/B0010EBVCQ