Good Times Grocery Store

[Anonymous No.9631152]

Well we did pet peeves, but it wasn't/isn't all bad, let's hear about those good times working at grocery stores.

Sure it often requires you to be bad at your job or downright steal, but fuck it, you don't own the store it's not your problem.

>store closes at 10
>just locking the door when a man runs up and bangs on it
>sorry sir we're closed, you'll have to go to the 24/7 Safeway down the street
>but I just need one thing
>register is closed so I can't help you
>it's not but fuck him

>filling apron with bulk candy and nuts
>muching on this custom trailmix all day
>store gets one of those fancy Jelly Belly design your own flavor mix
>wolfing down fistfulls of juicy pear beans while bagging

>store as a orange juicer
>machine somehow goes into berserk mode
>won't turn off just keeps juicing
>terrible design can't open hopper while it is running to remove oranges
>thing is heavier than sin so we can't push it from the wall to reach the plug
>just keeps pumping out juice
>all the baggers and produce guys are standing around it like it's a never ending wine fountain
>filling bottles and chugging it
>horrible stomach pains later but it was funny as fuck in the moment

>after closing box up all the leftover doughnuts and pastry from the cabinet
>the guy who delivers more in the morning throws it out anyways
>take this massive box of day olds to school the next day
>people go mental for it

>butchers are two stoner roommates
>they come through my lane for checkout
>about 25 white butcher paper packages
>all labeled ground beef
>clearly hot links, ribs, chops, steaks, whole fucking chicken
>they just mark stuff off as perished waste a few days early then buy it as ground chuck for next to nothing
>have a massive BBQ at their house the next day, charge people entry but not me the coconspirator

[Anonymous No.9631168]

>>9631152
I read it all. Whats my prize?

[Anonymous No.9631194]

>>9631152
>store chain owner's son gets a job as a bagger
>he's a bit of a cunt
>his day to do clean-up
>someone rams a endcap of wine boxes with a cart
>tips and probably 7-8 bottles shatter
>whole store smells like a drunk hobo
>poor bastard is wet mopping that shit for 20 minutes
>finally finishes and is pushing the bucket to the back
>it's janky wheel catches and he tips the whole bucket
>all the wine and a good gallon of stinky old mop water spills out
>poor bum is mopping for close to an hour

>Starbucks in the store that closes at 9
>only one guy works the closing shift for it
>he skips his hour break mid day
>takes it at 8 and effectively closes the store an hour early every day
>lady is standing by the counter looking super confused
>"where is the barista?! I want to get a frap and there is nobody here, they close soon where are they!?"
>he's on break ma'm
>dude is out in the parking lot getting a HJ from his GF while he waits for his shift to officially end

>after closing time to do go backs
>split everything into two piles
>two people take a pile each and one of the motor carts for fat people
>race around the store putting shit back ramming into shit
>coworkers all placing bets and cheering

>parking lot is at a slant
>baggers compete to see who can surf a cart down the lot the furthest
>one foot on the front one on the handle it's basically jackass
>one guy is really good takes it the whole way and bails right before the street
>lands in some bushes
>car shoots across the street into the drug store lot and bashes the fuck out of someone's Mercedes
>everyone scatters

>new guy is doing forklift donuts in the back
>slams into a giant rack of stock
>probably literal tons of cans and boxes start raining down
>he's fired immediately

[Anonymous No.9631202]

>>9631152
Hello new friend
I understand you enjoy posting blogs, but unfortunately you are on the wrong website
If you would like a better place to post your "life story" please go to >>>/r/eddit

[Anonymous No.9631227]

Not enough memes, don't forget /ck/ is /b/ now.

[Anonymous No.9632018]

I like this thread, good stories guys.

[Anonymous No.9632038]

GROCERY STORE GENERAL

*blocks your path*

[Anonymous No.9632053]

Thinking about picking a job as a stocker at my local Dillons. How much can i fuck off?

[Anonymous No.9632104]

>>9631152
I like this thread

[Anonymous No.9632113]

>>9631202
Fuck off retard it's an amusing thread

[Anonymous No.9632123]

>>9632053
Different from store to store but generally you're expected to work pretty fast. If you have a good manager you'll all work together and you can just talk for the whole shift. If you have a gay (I'm taking it back) manager then you'll get split up. This might be a good thing if you don't want to talk or your coworkers are gay.

[Anonymous No.9632134]

>>9632038
What the fuck is wrong with that cart?

It's pitifully small and doesn't even have a rack under the basket.

Is this some weird Euro shit?

[Anonymous No.9632145]

>>9631194
>new guy is doing forklift donuts in the back
maximum kek

[Anonymous No.9632148]

>>9631202
>my kazakhstani Bible study board is serious business

[Anonymous No.9632539]

>>9632113
I haven't found it amusing so far.

[Anonymous No.9632552]

>>9632539
Even
>new guy is doing forklift donuts in the back
>slams into a giant rack of stock
>probably literal tons of cans and boxes start raining down
>he's fired immediately
Didn't make you laugh? I'm morbidly depressed and still chuckled hard picturing this.

[Anonymous No.9632612]

>>9632539
Why did you actively seek out, post in, and stay in a thread you dislike?

[Anonymous No.9632634]

>>9632539
>>9632612
Were you never highschool age and fucking around at a shit job? Is it so hard to find something funny beyond le ebic memays? Would you like the thread better if OP had just posted a pepe and said he had 70lbs of beans what should he do with it?

[Anonymous No.9632646]

>>9632552
Glad you liked it, it was pretty fucking hilarious once we realized he wasn't dead. Cleaning up someone else's mess isn't so bad when it was such a spectacular fuck up. We did all have to watch a bunch of videos about workplace safety and pass some class on using forklifts.

[Anonymous No.9632659]

>>9632634
You never answered my question.
Why did you post in and wait in a thread you dislike, not once but three times?

[Anonymous No.9632672]

>>9632634
You're a dumb nigger and you're making what was a funny thread a shit one. Nothing in this thread is meme tier shit humor. Its funny anecdotes. Go read threads that you like.

[Anonymous No.9632682]

>>9632659
>>9632672
you guys are replying to the wrong anon

[Anonymous No.9632685]

>>9632682
fuck

[Anonymous No.9632698]

Only store I ever worked in was Ollie's Bargain Outlet and it was garbage. Not really even any funny or good stories; mostly were were just understaffed and overworked and dealt with white trash customers all day.

[Anonymous No.9632701]

>walking down aisle feeling a but hungry
>slash a bag of chips with my box cutter
>mark it down as broken package
>eat the chips

>office with the safe has a bunch of pictures up of people who stole shit
>all black men
>one day some white kids are stealing shit
>manager who put up the pictures tells them to put it back
>they run
>he never puts up their pictures

>creepy manager hits on all the milf soccer moms
>he's gross as fuck
>he's actually making progress with one
>coworker tells the woman that the manager is married
>he isn't but she never talks to him again

[Anonymous No.9632722]

>store has one of those escalators for carts
>junk thing is always breaking but people love it
>one day some dumb woman puts her stroller on it
>conveyor fucking destroys it
>tears that shit to shreds
>baby was in it, but she's still bitching
>yelling at everyone in the store calling the cops saying it was a hazard and we should be ashamed
>6 fucking signs saying carts only and even one saying no strollers
>cops point this out she flips out and storms off

[Anonymous No.9632733]

I loved watching people buy those 12 pack boxes of Carona. The shitty Mexican cardboard always fails when they carry it from one hand hole and next thing you know 12 bottles of piss water are covering the parking lot.

[Anonymous No.9632741]

>>9632733
I always put a hand under any packs of liquid in glass. Fuck that.

[Anonymous No.9632743]

>>9632722
>escalators for carts
wot is this

[Anonymous No.9632748]

>>9632646
>Cleaning up someone else's mess isn't so bad when it was such a spectacular fuck up
Heh yeah true and you were getting paid for it nonetheless. I can just imagine the next day them posting a memo like "Forklift donuts are NOT ALLOWED!"

[Anonymous No.9632753]

>all grocery managers are alcoholics with short fuses
>some coke vender fucked up a pallet
>grocery manager goes to move it
>busts a bunch of cases
>takes entire pallet into parking lot and sits next to the dumpster busting each case one by one
> totals out the entire pallet and charges coke for it

[Anonymous No.9632758]

>>9631152
tldr I demoted myself from gstl at target to a cart attendant. The alleviation of stress was notable enough, but my coworkers turned out to be just a sick as me and we made some great memories..

The best was our large game collection, located in the "green cartwell". Our carts were located in a glass area between the entrance and exit doors, so we used the rails supporting to glass panes as a museum for the largest wasps, roaches, and random animal skulls we found in the lot. The display lasted for a few months before a customer got grossed out and reported it.

[Anonymous No.9632759]

>>9632753
Same manager:

>goes to move a pallet of beer
>it was stacked shitty so several cases of beer fall off
>freaks out and smashes $700 worth of beer
>rios off nametag and hands it to store manager

[Anonymous No.9632764]

>working graveyard shift at a gas station
>we close for a few hours to clean and prep coffee/hot dogs
>some drunk fucker starts banging on the windows demanding to be let in
>point to the closed sign
>he just yells louder
>store has a night window that can be opened to let people hand in cash
>its at crotch level
>he's standing directly in front of it
>slam it open into his crotch and yell at him to fuck off
>he gets mad and slinks off

another one
>4am
>fucking around on my phone cause no one is in the store at 4am
>see two guys running through the lot
>suddenly 6 cop cars
>two guys get tackled to the ground, shoved in a car
>cops drive off without ever even coming in and saying something to me

I have loads of graveyard shift stories.

[Anonymous No.9632773]

>>9632753
>>9632759

[Anonymous No.9632777]

>>9632701
>coworker tells the woman that the manager is married
>he isn't but she never talks to him again

hahahaha thats fucked up but gold

[Anonymous No.9632780]

>we're supposed to scan out broken boxes so management knows it wasn't stolen
>for ice cream we just take it out of the box and leave it in the freezer
>eat ice cream at work
Yep, that was the highlight.

[Anonymous No.9632783]

>>9632764
m o r e

I think doing the night shift at a gas station could be a pretty chill job. Tell me more about the good and bads.

[Anonymous No.9632790]

>>9632780

[Anonymous No.9632792]

>>9632783
Not the same poster, but you end up burnt out with great memories and a lot of scars. Grave can be savage at times..

[Anonymous No.9632794]

>>9632722
Oh yeah, I know that second one.
>older Hispanic guy
>short and ugly
>hard worker though
>assistant grocery manager
>always talks about women and how many he's been with
>when he says anything over a 4/10 he makes weird sounds
>something of a mix between a whistle, purr, and moan
>no one likes it
>we all talk shit behind his back
>brags that the most he ever paid for a date was the price of a 12 pack of beer
>pretty sure he's gone through 3+ wives

[Anonymous No.9632798]

>working with a old woman
>tells me how she keeps a journal of men’s semen she had ate
>records diets, age, semen characteristics in the journal

Fucking degenerates work at grocery stores

[Anonymous No.9632805]

>>9632798
Sounds like a typical 4chan user.

[Anonymous No.9632806]

>>9632792
post memories anon

[Anonymous No.9632812]

>>9632798
That's weird, all the older people I worked with were hard workers. Most had kids really young so they never went to college, but they work hard as hell to provide for their family. It makes me so sad.

[Anonymous No.9632814]

>doing a compactor bale truck reload
>we would use an electric pallet jack to reload the truck in the parking lot
>we’d have one guy in the trailer with a regular pallet jack to cram the bales in
>driver tells grocery manager to load the last bale sideways to fit them all in
>falls off the pallet jack and busts open in the parking lot
>spend an hour picking up all the cardboard boxes and throw it into the dumpster

[Anonymous No.9632836]

>Working in stock room with new hire.
>Vape in one of the bays while working.
>He thinks it's cool as fuck that we can do that in the store.
>"Yeah, boss doesn't care as long as you don't do it on the floor."
>Watch him fumble around and pull out his vape pen from his pocket and vape on the stock room floor.
>He gets fired the next day.
>Boss asks me about it, why he thought he could do that in front of the cameras.
>Tell him I have no idea, I was ass deep in a pallet when he must have done it.
>We both shake our heads at the stupidity of some kids.
>Especially when they don't know where the camera blind spots are like me.

[Anonymous No.9632847]

>>9632783
yea what >>9632792 said is true. Like at some point all there's so much weird terrible shit that a good experience is just a night where nothing bad happened. But in general

The Good:
You probably get to work alone with no manager watching over you, so you can run the store however you want.
Most people don't want to wait till the next day to complain to management if they have a problem.
you get to watch the sunrise every morning.
free soda/icee/coffee/hot dogs/nachos
you mostly sit around and do nothing all night (I just watched netflix on my phone most nights)
you almost never have to worry about venders or helping unload deliveries, or surprise visits from health inspectors or higher ups.

The Bad:
sleeping during the day sucks, and drains you of all energy.
85% of your clients are drunk/high and will be huge assholes.
you get yelled at by drunk assholes all the time
most of the work you do is cleaning and stocking, very boring
there's always the threat of above mentioned drunk assholes driving through a pump
you WILL get robbed eventually.
heroin addicts will shoot up in your bathrooms and leave behind their needles and bleed on the walls/floor when they fuck up

[Anonymous No.9632848]

>worked in a small store that was insanely busy
>produce would get a truck at 9-11pm every night
>anywhere from 6-12 pallets
>would be expected to break down the entire truck and have the pallets in the refrigerator by 12

Fuck that store. Some nights we’d have to break down 10 pallets or so in 2 hours or less

[Anonymous No.9632854]

>>9632764
I wasn't working at the store but this reminds me of a story.

>walking with friends down the street in the bad side of town pretty buzzed
>it's probably about 1 in the morning
>find a 7-11 and we stop for chips/candy/drinks
>sitting on the curb right outside the door of the shop just eating
>van pulls up parallel to the store doors rather than parking
>man in driver seat literally has a balaclava on
>van panel door slides open half way
>we see it has no seats just a plywood floor
>there are at least two guys in there
>one is for sure wearing a mask
>driver says something to him
>they converse for a second
>door closes and the van drives off
>we all sit saying nothing for half a minute
>"we all just saw that right?"
>pretty sure they decided robbing the store wasn't worth having to kill us or let us witness it

[Anonymous No.9632855]

>see really good coupon
>"forget" to scan it

[Anonymous No.9632867]

>>9632854
>working graveyard
>11pm
>group of highschool kids come in
>one kid comes up the counter
>"Hey have you ever been robbed?"
>answer not yet
>"well you look like this has happened to you before, open the register this is a robbery"
>tell him to fuck off before i call the cops
>"hey man it was just a joke"
>call the cops anyway and watch him and his friends run out of the store in a panic

[Anonymous No.9632888]

>>9632552
I work at an auto glass factory, and a driver did this with a rack of glass. It flings off his forks, everything shattered, they make him clean it up. Then, they fired him

[Anonymous No.9632925]

>>9632134
>Is this some weird Euro shit?
Yes

[Anonymous No.9632938]

>>9632812
>tfw you can see the look of soul-crushing stress and burden on their faces

[Anonymous No.9632949]

>>9632938
Literally knew one who looked just like that + 30 lbs

[Anonymous No.9632973]

>worked at Whole Foods
>had to listen to faggots nonstop complaining about politics
>fatasses never did any work and would leave with their stuff undone
>my section dwindled from 5 people working at once to just me

shit sucked and it wasn't entertaining at all. I pity anyone who works at grocery stores.

[Anonymous No.9632996]

>white trash kid comes in
>super baggy pants sagging low
>shoes probably two sizes too big and not tied
>grabs a bottle of shitty vodka off the shelf and tucks it under his shirt
>coworker sees him and tells him to put it back
>kid runs
>makes it out the door before the inevitable
>trips on his dumb fashion and hits the asphalt hard chest first
>vodka bottle shatters against his chest stabbing the fuck out of his gut
>starts crying and rolling over onto his back
>must be 20 vodka soaked cuts on this kid probably some glass inside him
>we call 911 EMTs must have spent the whole drive to the ER pulling glass out of him

[Anonymous No.9633615]

>one manager has this nose like Cyrano
>everyone makes fun of him behind his back
>one night the store gets robbed
>they tie up the manager with extension cords and leave him in a back office
>robbers go to try and break into the safe and ATM
>manager kicks the desk until the phone falls off
>annnnd you guessed it dials 911 with his fucking nose
>cops catch all the robbers
>this guy's legendary sized schnoz saved the store

We still made fun of him, but more out of respect than anything. The jokes turned into things about how he used his nose to stop a runaway train or put out a fire.

[Anonymous No.9634339]

>>9632134
>I can't fit all my candy in that
Fucking Americans

[Anonymous No.9634510]

>>9631152
More like assholes employees abusing the system thread

[Anonymous No.9634512]

I have more goofy shit, good times, and bad times than I can remember
>produce department at Albertson's ages ago
>have very very large wooden table with a pull-out shelf that extends over the front casters by the front door that we use for main sales
>one week there's a major cantaloupe sale
>6 am, alcoholic manager decides to build up a huge display
>starts by pulling out the shelf and loading it first
>about four layers deep the table tips over forward, shelf breaks off
>someone flipped the motion sensor on the door open out of laziness (not supposed to be on until the store's open), so the door opens and lets all the cantaloupes roll into the lot
>parking lot is slanted towards the street, so manager is now chasing melons towards traffic
>fortunately they all roll into a ditch instead of the intersection
>spends the next few hours hauling melons out of a ditch and trying to fix the table

>repainting receiving room
>almost empty paint can falls over and gets left at some point
>small amount of remaining paint dribbles out and dries on the floor
>pick up bucket and dried paint comes up attached to it in perfect "spilled paint" shape
>plant it on store director's desk

>working seafood, not Albertson's thank the lord, early AM
>someone pages me to receiving
>try to finish what I'm doing real quick first
>paged again within like every thirty seconds, chick on the intercom sounds upset
>walking back there wondering what the fuck I did so wrong, maybe left some frozen out or something
>get to the back
>bakery manager, receiver, and another chick are all standing on the receiving desk shrieking
>one incredibly dust and cobweb covered crawfish is on the floor a good 15 feet away from them in the little threat pose they do
>takes me a while to stop laughing and get my shit together before carrying him out

[Anonymous No.9634592]

>>9632847
>you WILL get robbed eventually.
I was always curious about this, does policy let you have a gun or defend yourself or are you expected to comply and meet the demands?

[Anonymous No.9635498]

>>9634592
If its a mom and pop shop where a robbery seriously effects the store, maybe. But if you're working at a corporate chain store hell no. You're supposed to keep as little cash in the drawer as you can and just give them whatever they want. If you have a panic button push it, otherwise just wait for them to leave and call the cops. Everything is insured so theres no point in endangering your life over a minimum wage job.

[Anonymous No.9635548]

>>9631152
>24/7 store
>2AM on a Tuesday
>Wandering around the store just bored
>Group of people come in
>About my age, picking up mixers and snacks, resupplying a party
>Hear them start to argue
>One of them doesn't want to go back, doesn't feel safe
>They ditch her
>She's crying in the foreign foods aisle
>Ask what's wrong
>Cheer her up
>Have trolley races up and down the store when my boss goes to check the freezers
>Drive her back at 4am when my shift ends
>Become friends
>Still best friends 5 years later

>Store starts selling cheap Chinese toys
>Spring-operated pellet guns
>Swap the springs out with ones from assisted hole-punches
>Spend an entire night with the manager out sick shooting each other with grapes at high velocity across the store

[Anonymous No.9635682]

>>9635548
Good post.

[Anonymous No.9635776]

>>9634592
Dude just give them the cash or whatever else they want. You don't want to die/get seriously fucked over $200 and a pack of cigs.

[Anonymous No.9635833]

>>9633615
That's fantastic

[Anonymous No.9635858]

>>9632764
more

[Anonymous No.9636566]

>>9634510
>t.store manager faggot

[Anonymous No.9636570]

>work produce
>it's peach season
>peaches have shit shelf time, basically you have to cull them thoroughly every day or they go all moldy and shit
>no one culled them on tuesday
>or yesterday
>today's a holiday so fuckall for customers
>mfw it's time to purge the peaches

I love culling produce, it makes me feel like a god

[Anonymous No.9636627]

>>9636570
>store stocks a metric fuck ton of cabbage
>maybe it was for the Irish I don't know
>an entire pallet of it goes bad, all soft and we can't sell it anymore
>push it out back and leave it there to get picked up
>some kids find it overnight and have a snowball fight with cabbages
>tons of camera footage of these 12-13 year old kids braining each other with cabbages
>fucking things explode on contact
>area is fucking littered with cabbage bits for a week before raccoons eat it all

I have to admit it looked like they were having fun.

[Anonymous No.9636710]

>>9631152
Waiting until one of my fellow produce guys was trapped in the cooler unloading our delivery, look him in the eyes, farting, then walking back out onto the sales floor. Good times.

[Anonymous No.9636720]

>store has a pig barrel
>all the expired produce and hot deli food at the end of the day goes in it, basically everything
>gets sent to pig farms to be eaten
>one day the deli has pork ribs for the daily special
>they look like shit and not many sell
>worker tosses them all into the pig barrel
It was an odd feeling promoting cannibalism.

[Anonymous No.9636781]

>>9634512
An automatic door making way for a gang of melons is the funniest thing I’ve heard all day

[Anonymous No.9636783]

>>9636720
Going to be like that X-files episode with the cannibals getting a degenerative brain mold.

[Anonymous No.9636881]

>>9632134
It's a senior cart, low depth so they don't have to bend in and deep handlebars for the ones who walk with their back at a permanent 90 degree angle.

[Anonymous No.9636926]

>All items neatly stacked in a bucket.
>Dump that shit out onto register so I can scan it.
>Enjoy look of horror on customers face.

[Anonymous No.9636954]

>>9636783

It's called a prion and usually isn't a problem as long as brain tissue of the same animal isn't eaten.

[Anonymous No.9636985]

>>9636954
Oh they ate the shit out of it in that episode. Good episode actually.

[Anonymous No.9637045]

The Publix in my area where I go to college stopped giving out samples in the deli(i.e. tenders, popcorn chicken ect) because niggers were abusing it. Why must goddam filthy niggers ruin everything.

[Anonymous No.9637121]

>>9635548
Explain the bb gun mods some more please. I don't understand.

[Anonymous No.9637169]

>>9637121
BBguns have weak springs to fire the pellets at eye-safe speeds, industrial hole punchers... punch through quarter inch paper stacks.

[Anonymous No.9637231]

>>9637121
You can customize a lot of nerf guns the same way. Bigger springs and boring out air holes larger makes those little foam darts blow people away.

[Anonymous No.9639210]

>eye-safe speeds

not sure why but this made me chuckle a hearty bit

[Anonymous No.9639312]

>>9632764
Doing graveyard shift at chevron right now m8 heres a story
>be me
>at chevron werkin'
>theres some fuckbag that always comes by and hits the emergency pump shutoff switch outside
>every time he does this the fuel company dude has to come out and reset it and it pisses both of us off
>one night im outside the store smoking a bit of da herb because its slow as fuck
>go back inside the store high as fuck
5 minutes later
>making pots of coffee and about to crack open my big ol can of /sip/ when my till starts freaking the fuck out
>i already know the sound
>someone hit the mother fucking pump switch
>run towards the door with my unopened can of /sip/
>dinosaur.jpg
>go outside and this fat tweeker bitch at the shutoff switch (about 10 yards away) >makes brief eye contact with me and begins this retarded football player run to her still running car
>chuck my unopened can of /sip/ at her
>beam her right in the fucking head
>she gets knocked and does a 3 second run/stumble before eating shit
>pull out phone and call cops and tell her dont fuckin get up
>cops come and throw her in car
>shes crying saying i hit her with a can of /sip/ and beat her up
>"No she stole that and when i chased her out she hit the shutoff switch."
>cops didnt buy it they think i beat her up
>fuck.jpg
>just then the gas company dude comes
>he's pissed off because this is like the third time in two weeks he's had to come out at 2AM to reset the pumps
>i tell him how thats the bitch thats been doing the gas shenanigans
>he tells the cops about the whole scenario and they lock that fuckin bitch up
>im cleared of all wrongdoings
>me and gas pump guy lol about it and i get to pet the cops k-9
>boss hears about it
>get raise

[Anonymous No.9639363]

>>9632847
This fucking guy nailed it. This is graveyard shift nigga, where only the unthinkable happens
>be me working at chevron
>outside having a cig
>this chevron is in a really nice area so hardly any dindus or real problematic people to deal with other than "can i speak to your manager" types
>every once in a while, though some shit goes down
>wild black couple appears!
>arguing in the parking lot, kids crying in the car loud as fuck
>black chick yelling at the top of her lungs
>YOO WANNA HIT ME?! HIT ME!! PUTHY ATH NIKKA!! PUUTTHHYY AAATH NYYIIIKKAAAA
>call cops
>whenever a gas station calls the cops theyre there in a fuckin heartbeat
>two cops show up, lights lights flashing, right when the dark folk get ready to leave in thier car
>they try and pull out but the cops blocked them in
>turns out they both had warrants
>sweet old black grandma had to come pick up the kids while tyrone and tyroneesha are getting arrested
>they call cops racist
>one of the arresting officers is black

[Anonymous No.9639367]

>>9639363
>PUTHY ATH NIKKA!! PUUTTHHYY AAATH NYYIIIKKAAAA

what the fuck does this even mean

[Anonymous No.9639376]

>>9639367
Pussy ass nigga but she had a speech impediment or whatever where her S's made that "th" sound

[Anonymous No.9639378]

>>9639367
Oh nevermind, got it

>>9639376
I think that's like a lisp or something

disgusting

[Anonymous No.9639380]

>>9639367
Pussy ass nigga

[Anonymous No.9639398]

Theres also this guy whose convinced that rush limbaugh and his ex wife are paying people like 200K to kill him. He comes by with all these recordings of his wife "discussing a contract killing" but its always just some slight static out of this twenty minute long recording and hes like "did you hear it? She says 20 thousand to kill him"
Hes a really nice well adjusted guy which kind of makes me think he might be right but hes probably just a wierdo.
Also, if anyone wants to work graveyard at a gas station: dont. The only reason i still do it is becuse a back injury prevents me from going back to construction and i basically get paid $16 an hour to smoke weed and chill

[Anonymous No.9639443]

>>9632743
These things

They're pretty neat

[Anonymous No.9639444]

>>9639398
No idea what the first half of your post is all about but make sure you see a PT or OT and don't fall for the opioid trap.

[Anonymous No.9639451]

>>9632134
Euros don't need to travel to grocery stores. They just wait until they're already at one.

[Anonymous No.9639476]

>>9639451
>grocery stores go to euros

wtf so advanced

[Anonymous No.9639820]

>>9632758
more from this deviant pls

[Anonymous No.9639883]

>>9637045
wahhhhhh

[Anonymous No.9639976]

>>9639312
This was a really nice story. I like that you got to pet the dog and you got a raise. You deserved it.

[Anonymous No.9640011]

>>9631152
>work with peter
>Peter is a fucking tool, dumb as dog shit
>Peter gets a cold sore
>Convince Peter that ky jelly is a legit cold sore remedy, but he needs to apply it diligently every 10 minutes and it will be cured by the end of the day
>Pete walks around the rest of the day smearing lube on his face infront of customers.

[Anonymous No.9640018]

>>9639443
>multistory target

where the hell is this?

[Anonymous No.9640029]

>>9640018
Pretty sure that one's in Boston

[Anonymous No.9640054]

>>9634339

You can't fit a month's worth of groceries in it.

[Anonymous No.9640057]

>>9632123
You're not on reddit. Use whatever language you want without explanation. Nigger.

[Anonymous No.9640105]

>>9640018
They aren't very rare. It's not really multistory all the time. Most I've seen the lower level is parking or something like that.

[Anonymous No.9640164]

>>9632539
So fuck off then. People who feel the need to express they don't like something when they can just leave or not participate should be gassed, regardless of topic or situation.

[Anonymous No.9640183]

>>9632848
Fellow produce person here.

Fuck stores like that, I had that and I often was stuck putting the meat and produce in, 7-9 pallets total and breaking them down.

Fuck produce graveyard produce without a second person.

[Anonymous No.9640208]

>>9632836
Dick

[Anonymous No.9640210]

>>9639443
malls have this shit all over

[Anonymous No.9640213]

>>9632798
shoulda banged

[Anonymous No.9640243]

Not a grocery store, a sports apparel store,I was officially a sales person but I did literally everything
>july in south carolina
>busy AS FUCK
>good ol amerimutts love their sports so my store was always jam packed
>I fucking hated working there
>one day, spot a shady negro with a backpack
>Thisgonnabegood. png
>follow him around subtly, 2 mins in and I see him putting a 100$ jersey in a backpack
>give him the most disgusted, suicidal look ever
>at that point, I don't think it was possible to care less for something, ever
>little negro looks at me in absolute shock thinking I'm gonna do shit
>turn around and walk away

[Anonymous No.9640563]

>starting working restock/night shift at a local grocery store
>guys in charge of freezer and produce have to come in that night to do inventory
>2 old guys but they're pretty chill
>one of them waves me into the backroom, then downstairs
>asks if i smoke weed
>wellyea
>we all go back into the cooler
>they smoke me up on several bowls
>welp, guess we should actually work
>have a great night

>working with 2 new guys who do the same shit as me
>manager is out doing some other shit that night
>one guy says he can get some k2 from a gas station if we want
>wellyea
>he leaves for about 30 minutes and nobody gives a shit, including cool black church-guy janitor
>it's time for lunch break
>we go out into the car and hit it up, janitor keeps scrubbing the floors
>i black out and pass out (i guess)
>they said i started getting more and more quiet, then just slumped over and they couldn't wake me up
>they leave me in the car and go back b/c break is over
>wake up 15 minutes later
>whatthefuck
>go back into the store
>janitor looks at me and shakes his head, calls me a dumb lightweight, keeps doing his own shit
>coworkers and i all have a chuckle
>it never gets brought back up again

not a whole lot of actual grocery related stories, but entertaining times nonetheless

[Anonymous No.9640578]

>>9640563
>smoking k2 while on the clock
ah, so this is the mind of a person who isn't capable of more than min wage work

[Anonymous No.9640636]

>>9640578
i was indeed far more degenerate at that point in life than now

[Anonymous No.9640755]

>>9639312
>police k9 doesn't smell weed on you and start barkan
i call bullshit

[Anonymous No.9641052]

>>9639883
>t. Nigger
kys, Jamal.

[Anonymous No.9641056]

>day off today
>spend the whole day playing video games and not doing anything

fuck sakes lads

then again one might argue that not doing anything one day of the week while you spend 6 days of it doing stuff is a worthwhile activity

[Anonymous No.9641139]

>>9639312
Cops that automatically believe cunts should be hanged.

[Anonymous No.9641176]

>>9640755
They don't bark, they sit down.

[Anonymous No.9641522]

>>9634512
>before carrying him out

[Anonymous No.9642059]

>Breaking down a display table at work.
>One of those industrial steel ones that are a pain in the ass to deal with.
>Manager is "supervising"
>He makes a comment that my boots are not sales floor approved as I am dismantling heavy steel trying to not get myself killed because "Muh customer safety."
>Almost get done and he decides to "help" by grabbing one of the table tops to put on a pallet so I can haul it away.
>His hand slips and the table top lands on his foot.
>mfw his "dress code approved" fancy black shoes did diddly shit to prevent his foot from getting broken.
>Now he understands why I swear steel toes.

[Anonymous No.9642078]

>>9632741
>2017
>not being a dipshit

[Anonymous No.9643425]

>>9640054
I heard that Europeans generally make more trips to the grocery store, and it would be rare of them to buy a whole month of groceries at once

[Anonymous No.9643434]

>Take a new hire out to show him how to fill propane tanks for the forklift/cleaning crew.
>Go over the basics of safety, cold shit is cold, wear gloves, etc.
>"Oh, and be mindful of static, we don't want to blow up."
>Tell him to hold onto the metal gate so he grounds himself as I fill the tanks up so he can see how it's done.
>He has a death grip on the gate for ten minutes as trucks jake brake behind us on the freeway.

[Anonymous No.9643523]

>>9643425
Can confirm
Max people buy here in Germany is a weeks worth of groceries

[Anonymous No.9643531]

>>9643425
probably because the grocery is generally closer and they are probably walking to it instead of using their car, because their cities actually make some fucking sense

>>9639312
>i get to pet the cops k-9
did u give him a handy? be honest

[Anonymous No.9643537]

>>9635498
>endangering your life over a minimum wage job
I think most americans would unironically do this. not only do they feel immense loyalty to their corporate masters, but they would also probably be fired for being robbed.

[Anonymous No.9644262]

>>9632783
>I think doing the night shift at a gas station could be a pretty chill job

O RLY?

Body Bags (1993)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pb51aSiwUEA
- "Gas Station" first story which starts around 2:25, but do watch the intro.

[Anonymous No.9644731]

>>9643537
>they would also probably be fired for being robbed.
That's illegal. You just get sent home and a few days of paid time off.

[Anonymous No.9644818]

>>9643537
>they would also probably be fired for being robbed

More likely they would be arrested as being an accomplice.

[Anonymous No.9645121]

>worked at gas station with magnetic door lock
>group of maybe 6 kids comes in
>all of them are being noisy scurrying everywhere
>three of them come up to me and start asking
>retarded questions to keep me busy
>see one little guy kind of shaking with his back to me
>see him stick maybe 10 big bags off beef jerky in his hoodie
>immediately hit the magnetic lock
>he looks at the lads up front and they made some kind of code noise and they all ran towards the door
>kid with the jerky smashes his face on the door and nose is bleeding
> tell him i saw him take the jerky and that i knew what they were all up to
>make them all empty out their pockets or Ill call the cops
>mfw I made $14 dollars, some change, a maglite and a bald eagle pocket knife. got the jerky back and they left empty handed

[Anonymous No.9646344]

>>9640054
Fucking what. How do americans shop for a month at a time? Wouldn't you need several carts and a van, assuming you're an average family of 4?

[Anonymous No.9646371]

>>9632798
Is your name in that journal, anon?

[Anonymous No.9646389]

>>9635548
Are you an anime?

[Anonymous No.9646399]

>>9646344
yeah, we're all fucken rich, so we all got mad carts and vans, just whatever you need, you know?

[Anonymous No.9646704]

>>9646344
Oh shit man... you should try doing check lanes on food stamp night. Those sick fucks will piss you off every time.
>2-4 carts packed full.
>Lots of fucking TV dinners.
>Always some fuck that gets around 50 to 100 bucks worth of lobster.
>They all have nice clothes and expensive phones.
>Talk about how there next kid will bring them another $200 a month or some shit.
>Get pissy if you take more than 3 minutes a cart.
It's a fucking ordeal.

[Anonymous No.9646977]

>Work in grocery store bakery
>manager starts telling cake decorator what to do
>He's being a real ass about it
>Cake decorator says back to him "Yes, massah, right away Massah" in a racist black voice
>Gives her speech about slave wages
>She doesn't get wrote up cause if a cake decorator quits it's too much of a hassle to train a new one
Best part is everyone involved in this incident is white. We all had a good chuckle

[Anonymous No.9647018]

>working produce
>hear shitload of noise from people talking, lots of adults and kids both, coming from around corner
>aw shit we're about to get torn up
>first big cart rounds corner
>as full as can possibly be with bud lite
>second cart rounds corner
>packed elbow to elbow with children
>third cart rounds corner
>about a quarter full of various meats
>proceed to fill it to near overflowing with produce
Guess the race and the event.
Seriously though, I appreciated them keeping the gaggle of kids off the floor, even if the noise was unholy.

[Anonymous No.9647340]

>>9632722
>tears that shit to shreds
>baby was in it

did this thing kill baby

[Anonymous No.9647435]

>>9640018
We had one, before they gtfo'ed out of Canada, RIP

[Anonymous No.9648054]

>>9647018
NASCAR! and idk what races they do

[Anonymous No.9648063]

>>9631194
>dude is out in the parking lot getting a HJ from his GF while he waits for his shift to officially end
lel guy knows how to live

[Anonymous No.9648067]

>>9646977
>Used to work freight with a three man crew.
>One of them was a Samoan dude who was cool as fuck, as long as he wasn't throwing a box of pans at your head.
>Manager comes over and starts doing his ranty Jew "You need to work faster" speech because we are standing around, between trucks.
>Samoa Joe looks at him and asks "It's because i'm Black, isn't it?"
>Never in my life have I seen a manager go dead silent, turn heel and leave.
>Five minutes later he smashes a box of pyrex bowls on the floor of the truck because I told him they were unbreakable.

[Anonymous No.9648083]

>>9632836
Kind of a dick move man.
Be nice to newbies.

[Anonymous No.9648092]

>>9632134

It's a cuck cart. Single adults don't need to buy a lot of groceries.

[Anonymous No.9648094]

>>9648083
He was an annoying shit.
He turned my bay light off when I was unloading a truck once.

[Anonymous No.9648142]

>>9632996
He deserved it for being a nigger

[Anonymous No.9648152]

>>9640164
I don't find your comment very amusing.

[Anonymous No.9648303]

>be me
>worked the night shift full time at Jack in the Box
>only me and shift manager every night 5 to 7 nights a week because the store manager was a prick and never staffed our shift over the manager and I
>really busy most of the week, especially Wednesday through Saturday
>manager was a dealer, made more money selling pot than working
>we actually became the best of friends and hung out all the time
>we smoked every night we worked there
>blunt before work, a blunt when the system went down for an hour or two, and bowls on breaks
>always fucking stoned, but still do our job great and accurately
>this was the only way to tolerate other high and drunk beligerant assholes on a constant basis, especially since I worked at Walmart full-time as well and hated my existence

Was a good time. Got paid to be baked and eat free shit.

[Anonymous No.9648339]

>>9631152
>Baggers
Home of the brave

[Anonymous No.9648351]

>>9637045
Because whites are too pussy to do anything about it, snowflake.

[Anonymous No.9648371]

>>9643425
Huh, that's interesting 'cus I'm Aussie, and I've always just done a weeks worth every Thursday night (late night shopping night) is that an amerifag thing as well?) unless I've been out a few nights each week then I don't even go to the supermarket until the next Thurs. night

[Anonymous No.9648400]

>>9648351
True. We should stop feeding niggers in Africa, since we're the only ones sending them aid and food, as well. Maybe then they'll learn to not eat the seeds we send and actually grow food from them. Oh well. Nigs gonna nog. I hope we take away our malaria nets, too. You know, since the Africans dont need no help from whitey inventions n sheit.

[Anonymous No.9648429]

>>9632134
>Is this some weird Euro shit?

Don't know about the other euro bro's but ours has a rack underneath for crates of beer.

[Anonymous No.9648441]

I don't work at one but I went in late one night, got my shit and left, a woman got out of her car and I told her that they were closed.
>mfw they didn't close for another 10 minutes

[Anonymous No.9648472]

>>9647340
Nope that was an auto correct typo. Or at least the rest of the statement would suggest that.

[Anonymous No.9648504]

I worked at a Starbucks kiosk in a grocery store on a tougher side of town.

>homeless people hung out in our lobby when snowy outside
>most were awful except this one Vietnam vet
>be friendly to him, he's friendly back.
>be an asshole...
>be the one working the bar, coworker running register.
>suddenly a phone in a pink cased is shoved into my face outta nowhere.
>"HAVE YOU SEEN THE BITCH WHO HAD THIS PHONE?!"
>wut.jpg
>me: "no...I'm sorry"
>reach around his arm and call out a drink, it's the morning rush
>before customer gets it, man-with-phone slams the drink out of my hand
>spills hot pumpkin spice latte all over my hand, counter, and floor
>luckily I'm used to scalding myself accidentally with hot coffee or milk and no customer was hurt.
>"THIS BITCH COMES TO THIS STARBUCKS EVERY DAY, I KNOW YOU'VE SEEN HER!"
>surrounding waiting customers are either stunned or pissed at this dude holding me up
>tell the man as calm as I can that I have never seen someone with that phone in my life. Ask if he isn't purchasing something to please leave
>"FUCK YOU I KNOW YOU'VE SEEN HER
>he takes the closest thing to him, which happened to be the container of straws, and throws it at me then lunges at the counter.
>out of nowhere Vietnam vet fucking decks the dude in one hit and drags him out the side door without one word.
>apparently he knew of the dude from other homeless groups that peddled on the side of the interstate
>comes back in composed, apologizes, and starts helping me clean the spilled coffee and scrounge up and straws that weren't on the ground

I think he solved the issue because he just wanted a good place to stay warm a few hours out of the morning, and this tweaker looking for some chick made them look bad.

I gave the man 5 of those "any one item you want, it's on us" Starbucks paper things and $25 gift card to the supermarket the store was in, plus my coupon packet I got every few weeks for technically being an employee of the grocery store.

[Anonymous No.9648521]

>Bagboys
All fucking u-18 subhumans who want to fuck the cashiers

>Cashiers
Sluts/old women

>"front of house" management (the cashiers and bagboys' managers)
Stuck up burned out broken men who hate their jobs, the customers, and themselves

>Bakery
Every single one plays league of legends for some reason. Once saw two of them throwing uncooked bread at each other and then putting the buns in the oven

>Deli
young women who aren't pretty enough to be cashiers, plus one or two bossy landwhales

>Butchery/Fishery
Lazy fags who'd rather stay inside their room than deal with customers. I'm jealous of them because they can get away with it.

>shelf stockers
Mostly okay, work with them a lot you so get to know them

>produce
That's me. easiest job by far if you're into lifting things, arranging stuff properly and breaking down pallets

>Management in general
Always amusing to see how the deferential tone they assume when a director or something is inspecting the store, and then juxtapose it against the tone they use when nothing special's happening

[Anonymous No.9648575]

>>9647018
Mexicans

Chicken, produce, and Bud Lite is 100% Mexicans.

[Anonymous No.9648602]

>>9648521
>Produce
Cunts who think they're better than the rest of the world for doing jack shit.

>Shelf stockers
Drug addicts


fify

[Anonymous No.9648614]

>>9637045
>abloo bloo bring back muh gibs

I think I know the real reason why they got rid of it, sweetie.

[Anonymous No.9649139]

Am I going to hate myself if I get a job stocking or something at a grocery store? I've worked cashier positions at a few food places in the past and I hated it because I;m socially autistic and can't handle working directly with customers as a major part of my job. I figured if I worked stocking at my local grocery or the night shift at the attached gas station I could avoid this and save myself the stress, but I'm not actually sure that's the case.

[Anonymous No.9649182]

>>9649139
unless you get something like night shift you WILL have to interact with the vermin known as customers

Not as much as a cashier but still

[Anonymous No.9649240]

>>9640054
You grocery shop 12 times a year?

[Anonymous No.9649246]

I once over heard a woman say that her daughter likes to put cilantro in her cereal.

[Anonymous No.9649275]

>>9632996
more than 100% deserved it

[Anonymous No.9649529]

>>9649182
I feel like the interactions you would have as a stocker would be easier to deal with though. As a cashier/bagger it's all very time sensitive that you get your task done and you can fuck things up for the customer if you mess up. I'm not sure what kind of customer interaction being a stocker or something similar would entail, but I feel like it'd be lower stress over all.

[Anonymous No.9649573]

>>9649529
It is, it's mostly just "Do you have X? Can you check in your store?" and stuff like that

[Anonymous No.9649593]

>>9649240
Just how fat are you, Anon?

[Anonymous No.9649650]

>>9631202
this is a good thread and i’ve been here longer than you’ve known this site’s existed

[Anonymous No.9650057]

>>9636881
This makes a lot of sense. That weird grey cup on the handle makes me think it's for holding a cane, but I might be retarded.

[Anonymous No.9650215]

>>9643425
Canadafag and my trips are weekly, or bi-weekly if I'm lazy and willing to eat like shit for a few days. And don't you buy any fresh food? Bread, most meat, and produce is either eaten or gross after a couple weeks for me. There's a grocery store on my way back from uni anyways, so it's comfy to grab some shit before I get home.

[Anonymous No.9650392]

>>9648504
good guy vet

[Anonymous No.9650589]

>>9633615
I hope to god this actually happened. That's amazing.

[Anonymous No.9650756]

STOP FUCKING PUTTING YOUR CHANGE AND BILLS ON THE CONVEYOR BELT IT'S EXTREMELY RUDE REEEEEEEEE
>select all images of *store fronts*

[Anonymous No.9651112]

>>9650756
I've literally never seen or heard of this happening. Where are you?

[Anonymous No.9651911]

>>9651112
Fuck you dude

[Anonymous No.9651983]

>>9646704
I'm having PTSD reading that. Several years ago I used to be a cashier and WIC was on shitty checks that took forever and you had to put the register on a special "WIC" mode before ringing up anything and if it didn't qualify for WIC, tough shit.

The amount of "moms" that acted like entitled shits in front of their kids because they got the wrong size orange juice was fucking astounding and depressing.

Thank fuck WIC in my state finally went to EBT cards a few years ago.

[Anonymous No.9652024]

>>9648067
>pyrex
is it really unbreakable?

[Anonymous No.9652051]

>start working seafood department a few months ago
>only 4 people work the department: me, another young guy, chill old dude, and fucking Mort
>Mort has been working the department for more than 15 fucking years
>constantly cross contaminates shit, worries about shit that doesn't matter (like what way the sticker comes out on the scale), doesn't get any real work done (whenever he closes, he never bothers to fill inventory so that opening guy isn't overwhelmed), never rotates the fucking stock, and does extraneous steps to simple processes
>paired up to train with Mort one day on my first week after training with the other two guys
>proceeds to show me how to turn off the wrapper as if it's something mindblowing
>talks to me about how he got a 4K HDTV off some sketchy Russian website for $100
>watch car crash videos on YouTube in front of customers
>see him pick dead mussels that I trashed hours earlier and put them into the case when I was on break
>managers do jack shit about it

Fucking Mort.

[Anonymous No.9652084]

>>9646704
tfw actually poor, on a fixed income, and only get fifteen fucking bucks a month in ebt. at that level what's even the fucking point of pretending they're helping anyone?

[Anonymous No.9652102]

>>9640563
>smoking k2
You're a literal retard. Drugs aren't cool

[Anonymous No.9652146]

>>9646977

[Anonymous No.9652153]

>>9648614
>sweetie
ew

[Anonymous No.9652169]

>>9648504
That's a nice story anon, homeless people make me sad.

[Anonymous No.9652178]

>>9652169
not that guy, but I used to be homeless. did daylabor at the time though. it gave me about thirty bucks a day, not enough to get a place to stay but enough to feed myself and kill a few hours in a bar without having to beg

[Anonymous No.9652191]

>>9652178
How did you keep yourself from smelling? How did you get out of the situation. I don't want to bash the US because I admire your country in many ways, but I really think its sad that such wealthy nation has so many homeless. I'm assuming you're a burgerbro.

[Anonymous No.9652202]

>>9652191
Not him or the other guy, but public bathrooms. I used to use paper towels, sinks and soap to "shower" after workouts

[Anonymous No.9652207]

>>9652191
shave and stuff in public restrooms, pick up a few washcothes and give myself a sponge bath every couple of days, regularly buy cheap but servicable outfit from goodwill. change socks every fucking day. got out of it by joining the army, that didn't work out though. I'd basically been living off fast food for a few years so, ended up with stress fractures in my pelvis. didn't even finish basic, but got a couple grand and that was enough to get me on my feet when I got out. if I'd made a bit more money at day labor I would've gotten a y membership just for access to real showers

[Anonymous No.9652217]

>>9652024
Not when you chuck it with the force of a retard onto the steel floor of a truck container.
It was kinda funny.

[Anonymous No.9652277]

>Cashier at Whole Paycheck
>New guy in seafood more than likely sells drugs, like half the people in our store
>It's 8PM, autopiloting the register
>Some bitchy mom and her young daughter are in my line
>Daughter has hiccups something fierce
>Seafood guy gets in line behind them with his 24 pack of beer
>I bring up the episode of Ripley's believe it or not where the guy has perpetual hiccups
>It was directed towards the mother
>Seafood guy sways over with his bloodshot eyes popping out
>"You know, if that was me, I would fucking kill myself"
>He looks directly at the girl now
>"I would just kill myself"
>The mother and daughter both assume a look of terror and rush to leave
>Buy moonrocks from the guy

>One day WF does a promotion deal where every customer gets a free box of linguini pasta
>Don't fucking ask I honestly don't know
>Myself and my fellow cashier's are collectively baked and in varrying forms of hungover stupor
>In 8 hours each of us ask "And can I offer you a box of this free linguini today?" hundreds of times
>We start to become unglued, we begin throwing linguini at each other at first
>This evolves into us establishing linguini as the coin of the realm
>Soon we're denying linguini to rude customers, bombarding nice folks with multiple boxes
>We begin doing Jersey Shore personas, making Godfather references, anything to avoid completely losing our shit
>Find out the next day that the store across town was offering spaghetti noodles
>They weren't scarred for life by the syllaballic fuckery that is the word linguini

[Anonymous No.9652302]

>>9652277
>"You know, if that was me, I would fucking kill myself"
>He looks directly at the girl now
>"I would just kill myself"

[Anonymous No.9652315]

This is the best thread I've seen on /ck/ in a long fucking time. Makes me want to get a job in graveyard shift.

[Anonymous No.9652444]

>>9651911
Sorry mate, I'm not trolling; genuinely curios if this is a thing in America (I'm Canadian) but didn't want to deal with the O B S E S S E D spam.

We have a smaller checkout area on the other side of the cashier, away from the belt. We always exchange cash there. I know some rude twats put the money down on that surface rather than handing it to the cashier, but I've never heard of anyone putting it on the belt.

[Anonymous No.9652450]

>>9652277
>They weren't scarred for life by the syllaballic fuckery that is the word linguini

[Anonymous No.9652880]

>>9650589
Oh it's 100% true. Wasn't at a grocery store though to be honest, it was a movie theatre. Still a good story though.

[Anonymous No.9652899]

>>9648094
put that shit in your story next time nigga

[Anonymous No.9652913]

>>9631152
>working christmas eve
>our store is usually 24/7 but we close on christmas eve and reopen after christmas
>everyone, managers included, want to get the fuck out as soon as possible
>they instruct everyone to close things down early
>store is dead after 3pm and it's just a bunch of employees running around the store fucking around
>store officially closes at 7pm
>we lock the doors and whenever a customer comes to the door we basically get to tell them to fuck off cause we're closed

For a retailcuck, it feels like you're in heaven for a day.

[Anonymous No.9652920]

>>9639312
fake and gay

[Anonymous No.9652937]

>>9643425
i do that too, mostly because i cant afford a months worth of groceries at once
i go every week or so and grab a few things

[Anonymous No.9652954]

>>9646704
>cashier at dominicks
>full lines, at least 6 in my register with full carts
>foreigner with WIC checks comes in
>nothing they have in their cart is WIC approved
>mfw i have to go and show them every single thing that is approved while people in my line yell at me
thank fuck dominicks closed

[Anonymous No.9652985]

>>9652277
>work at whole foods
>come into work one day
>guy teaching me how to work the grill is gone
>no one knows
>more people start disappearing
>get called into managers office
>have records of me getting food at an incorrect price
>start sweating like my mom found my older sister collection
>say i dont remember shit
>they send me out
>3 people gone in a week, more transferring because of managers
this store is a fuckin trip everyone got fired in like 2 weeks and now its just like me and 3 other people in the prep department now and i dont know shit

[Anonymous No.9653102]

>>9652191
Starbucks kiosk ex-employee here.

Vietnam vet would use Kroger brand dry shampoo and wash up with it and some soap in the public bathrooms, though he was careful to not make a mess unlike some.

I drove by the store I used to work at tonight on my way to the Home Depot next to it to pick up something. I saw him still sitting in the lobby, eating a discount deli side of mashed potatoes (they're less than 50¢ after 8pm and they'll load up on the gravy) and it seems he got himself an ancient looking laptop.

He likely wants to find a job but he's definitely over 60, so most businesses don't want to hire an "elderly" person. My father-in-law got let go from his CAD oriented career because he's old and they could get away with paying a young person less without them bitching like a skilled worker.

I wish I could help the veteran more. He reminds me of my uncle, who has the luxury of having a home.

[Anonymous No.9653105]

>>9653102
>"Veteran"

You chump bleeding hearts will fall for anything

[Anonymous No.9653133]

>>9653105
He used an USAA debit card with a pin or signature required, and when he bought some cough medicine once when he had a cough I carded him (because we have to, cameras watching at this place because shady part of town) and he had the designation (works like organ donor) on his ID.

He never told me he fought in any war. Only told me after I asked him about his service when he used his USAA card.

Maybe it is because even with a menial job I don't have the ability to just turn off my brain, so I tend to notice obvious details, especially when repeated day after day.

[Anonymous No.9653139]

>>9631202
>>9652315
Thread has now attracted both ends of the spectrum. Pretty successful I must say.

[Anonymous No.9653213]

>>9640018
The Target in Tanforan, San Bruno has it too

[Anonymous No.9653650]

I worked at Ingles in highschool

>Our manager this particular night is a huge douchebag
>Out of form, he says we're overstaffed and 2 of us can go to clean the bathrooms
>Guy I go with is a bit awkward but whatever, many hands make light work
>If you've ever been in an Ingles, they're all laid out the same
>The bathrooms are on the far side of the bakery and deli area
>As we pass the muffins, we smell it
>The most good awful gut smelting rotten fecal stench I have ever in my life
>It still haunts me
>In our combined bravery, we crack the men's bathroom door
>Our 1.5 second inspection yields a lot to reflect on in our subsequent retreat
>The smell magnified by a factor of 10 as we opened the door
>As we witnessed the horror....
>Yellow-brown shit spray splattered out from under the foremost stall, coating the floor in a wide swathe, contrasting the tethered conical shape on the wall
>This is the CSI crimescene of ungoldy shits
>I immediately call our manager from the bakery PA
>"We have a complication"
>He comes back all pissed off, doesn't understand why we refuse to confirm our story with him
>Melanin dejects itself from his face as he gravely accepts our ultimatum
>"Go to aisle 17, we need 2 bottles of Fabulosa"
>Fabulosa is a blue semi-industrial cleaner
>Smells like cheap floral cologne shoved into your brainstem
>We go get the stuff
>As we get back our manager is unrolling a hose from the back, cranking the scalding water
>"Okay guys, one of you will have to go in and sling that Fabulosa on EVERYTHING. I'll follow with the water and we'll hose it down the drain
>Rock paper scissors to decide
>The other guy must be slow or have a scat fetish
>I made Rock a fraction of a second after I saw him form Scissors
>Thank you God

Later in the night....
>Old black man that works in the deli
>"Sheeeeiit I was beside that bastard when it happened"
>"Maaaan he had his shoes filled up with shit man, walked out like it was nothin"

[OSiRiS !OSiRiS3dfk No.9653768]

>>9639451
What the fuck is this post.

[Anonymous No.9653793]

>>9648303
How much sleep a day did you get? That routine doesn't sound sustainable

[Anonymous No.9653818]

>>9634339
Where do you put the dog food?

[Anonymous No.9653846]

>store has a reduced isle that gets filled up with lots of good cheap food at specific time
>finish shift at that time, and go to take a look
>swarmed with customers fighting and squeezing around tiny shelf
>they see my uniform and i have shopping in my hands, they all move aside thinking i have more reduced items
>pick up the best reduced shit stashed at the back behind stuff, and continue shopping
>customers pissed off they let me in and continue fighting over reduced shit

[OSiRiS !OSiRiS3dfk No.9653851]

>>9653818
In its belly.

[Anonymous No.9654443]

>>9652444
Well we have a smaller place to exchange money, but some customers do it on top of the conveyor belt. In general it really gets on my nerves and I feel like it's EXTREMELY disrespectful to put the money down

[Anonymous No.9654664]

>>9653213
God, Tanforan is such a shit hole. Every mall in San Burno/ South City is a shit hole but Tanforan in particular.

[Anonymous No.9654692]

>>9650057
Could also be for a self checkout scanner.

[Anonymous No.9654731]

>>9643425
Some weeks I go 3-4 times. There's one 100 meters from where I live, and when I come back from work (20 minute chill drive) I pass at least 5 different ones, should I feel like shopping there.

[Anonymous No.9654776]

>>9631152
and you faggots want $15 an hour
kek

[Anonymous No.9654870]

>>9654776
>tfw make 5 brazil bucks an hour

holy fuck time to end it

[Anonymous No.9654898]

One time the grocery store jester switched my eggs with ping pong balls

[Anonymous No.9655098]

>>9631152
kek why do you always do the closing stuf

>waiting in front of store
>mann in suit aproaches the door
>cashier jumps out of his chair and locks the door
>cashier smiles behind the door and shrugs.

[Anonymous No.9655108]

>>9654443
I agree that it seems rude, but it seemed such a strange thing to do that I couldn't quite understand

Punch the next one in the the throat for me

[Anonymous No.9655118]

>>9632134
its a cuck cart as i remember from /pol/
because its promoting being a single and not getting kids.

[Anonymous No.9655217]

>>9648504
Based vet

[Anonymous No.9655240]

>>9643425
maybe because they have more fresh stuf that has a lower shelf life and wouldnt be pleasant to eat after a month.

[Anonymous No.9655257]

>>9652985
>start sweating like my mom found my older sister collection
Are we just ignoring this?

[Anonymous No.9655268]

>>9655257
We were but then you fucked us, newbie.

[Anonymous No.9655273]

>>9655118
>not having kids is cuckold

rofl
yeah i hate having all this money and free time and happiness, instead I should listen to /pol/ and have children cause "muh white" so they can get fucking nuclear holocausted or killed by climate change floods, megahurricanes etc

human race has <200 years left

[Anonymous No.9655279]

>>9655268
I'll fuck u m8

[Anonymous No.9655284]

>>9655279
Catch me outside, homo. I'll fuck you til you love me.

[Anonymous No.9655303]

>>9655273
Baseline meat body human race has that long left. Cyborg and genetically modified human race has a lot longer.

[Anonymous No.9655305]

>>9632552
you do not fuck around with forklifts

[Anonymous No.9655346]

>>9654776
Well I was in High school at the time so making minimum wage was fine. Also worked weekend mornings as a caddie to make even more dosh. When you are 15-16 and your expectations of having money is next to nothing you can make yourself pretty loaded on low pay.

When you enter the real world the illusion is shattered.

[Anonymous No.9655358]

>>9655098
Was in school at the time, so I always worked closing after school and often times on weekends as well

[Anonymous No.9655375]

>>9639398
sounds like paranoid delusions(schizophrenia)

[Anonymous No.9655431]

>>9639398
>if anyone wants to work graveyard at a gas station: dont
>i basically get paid $16 an hour to smoke weed and chill
I don't know man you're making it sound pretty nice

[Anonymous No.9655454]

>>9653650
A S H E V I L L E

[Anonymous No.9655465]

>>9639398
>Hes a really nice well adjusted guy
apparently not if he thinks his wife has 20 grand to have him murdered for rush limbaugh

i mean, i could understand thinking some right winger you once wronged wants your head, or that your wife might hire a contract killer. the latter happening repeatedly is why Soldier of Fortune doesn't have the ads it used to. but having you killed for rush limbaugh for 20 grand no one has? wtf

>>9655431
youre likely to get robbed, likely to run afoul of some drunk who will beat you to death without even robbing you, the hours are long and boring, and the only social contact you get is with a rush of drunks at closing time and then maybe one or two methheads late at night trying to buy beer even though it's illegal and you dont even have the fridge keys

[Anonymous No.9655487]

>>9634510
Yeah, fuck the system. If the system is too retarded to stop people doing dumb stuff then i don't give a shit if they're abused.

[Anonymous No.9655526]

>>9640018
I know the downtown minneapolis target is two story

[Anonymous No.9656009]

>>9654898

[Anonymous No.9656275]

>>9655273
This. Even if we do get kids, whites can't compete with mudslimes and negros who shit out 6-8 children.
Better to just accept our defeat and enjoyr ourselves, while jews and their pets burn the world.

[Anonymous No.9656314]

>>9655454

Ayyyy....read my palms for me too?

[Anonymous No.9658015]

>>9653768
Namefags get out

[Anonymous No.9658030]

>>9658015
>He says, in response to a day old post
:^)

[Anonymous No.9658130]

>>9655305
OSHA pls go

[Anonymous No.9658331]

>>9643425
I think it is because they tend to use Public transportation, and you can't carry more than 2 bags of food easily.

[Anonymous No.9658384]

>>9653102
That shit happened to my own father too. First they transferred him to a dying sector of the company, then he was basically forced to retire. It was fucked up

[Anonymous No.9658651]

>>9648602
fuck off cunt
produce are the hardest workers

[Anonymous No.9658799]

>>9655305
https://youtu.be/9z77oztO6UQ

[Anonymous No.9658840]

>stocking overnight in grocery store
>whole crew plus boss hotbox in truck every break
>all stockers high as shit
>knocking crap over breaking class running pallets into things so we have to restack them
>general shit show every fucking day
>"good job guys see you tomorrow"

[Anonymous No.9658936]

working for publix fucking sucks and there are no good times. the only break from being overwhelmed is when someone stacks a pallet wrong and something falls off, usually soda or beer, and makes a fucking mess that we have to clean instead of custodial

[Anonymous No.9659016]

>>9648602
>Drug addicts
that's me. most of the guys do weed, one smokes out on the dock, i drink, and the old guy whose wife won't let him do anything.
>>9648521
>Bagboys
right on, cashiers are hot with dirty hands.
>produce
at our store, you have to pretend to look busy because there's nothing to do in that department. waiting on my transfer

[Anonymous No.9659074]

>>9658799
This is comedy gold.

[Anonymous No.9659335]

>omw to work as cashier aged 17
>trying to park bump a nice Mustang
>ofuckofuckofuck.jpg
>park to the end of the parking lot
>walking in some old man fell and busted his face (seriously already looked a black eye)
>ask if I should call ambulance or mall security
>he pleads that I don't
>walk in freaking out about my little accident
>tell someone to check up on old man
>clock in and get communicator
>anon what are you doing in you're at work an hour early
>I audibly say fuck with about 5 people at the customer service desk
>rush the fuck home calling my girlfriend on the way
>get home call my friend Collin for advice and he tells me to talk to my dad
>call my dad and he takes his lunch early to pick me up to my work and gives phone number to customer service desk just in case guy comes in
>my dad asks my manager if I'm going to be fired and my manager laughs at me about it
>tfw I told everyone I swerved from hitting the old man and hit the Mustang instead
My dude (front end assistant manager) makes jokes with me about the "fuck" incident. And always says hello like we're on the phone together. Like if he tells me to do something I say "fuck" in a loudly quiet way. When it happened he was like damn anon, you're just an hour early.

[Anonymous No.9660224]

>>9644731
Oh shit? That gives me an idea...
> get job at gas station
> get buddy to rob you
> "forget" to hit panic button
> split register profits
> enjoy paid time off in Vegas

[Anonymous No.9660658]

Okay... here we go.
>Be only man in bakery.
>Customer comes up.
>Her: "I would like to talk with one of your cake decorator ladies."
>Me: "She is on break. Can I help you?"
>Her: "Well I wanted to get a cake written on."
Such a classy thing to do. Not white trash at all.
>Me: "Oh, I can handle that."
>Her: (Looks shocked) "Really?"
>I proceed to write Happy Birthday *Insert retarded child's name*
>Bring it over to her with best hand writing there is in the history of ever.
>Her: "Oh... Wow... You did great. Good job." (Like I am kid that learned how to not shit it's pants)
>Me: "Thank you. Have a nice day."
I am a man. I am capable of decorating cakes. I am not gay... mostly. I find it funny when I blow peoples' minds that I can handle a simple task in a bakery and be a man at the same time.

[Anonymous No.9660665]

>>9660658
How is getting a cake written on trashy?

[Anonymous No.9660677]

>>9660665
Here got you a cake. Didn't want to make it myself but it did have it personalized for you. What do you mean it's spelled wrong? Darn cake decorator fucked up. I know it isn't spelled Ladasha.

It's spelled L--Ah

[Anonymous No.9660718]

>>9660677
That's like saying giving a hallmark card is trashy

[Anonymous No.9660782]

>>9660718
>hallmark HQ located in KC, MO
>not whitetrash

Sure thing. What's happenin' with the corn and pork belly futures, btw?

[Anonymous No.9660783]

>>9660782
Not sure, I just put my money in coffee cans and bury them

[Anonymous No.9660794]

>>9632996
This brings me a sick but satisfying joy.

[Anonymous No.9660799]

>>9632038
10.000, different types of crackers, yes, has to be Euro...

[Anonymous No.9660805]

>>9660799
The shopping cart actually has vegetables and fruit in it so I would agree.

[Anonymous No.9660906]

>>9641139
Honestly the accusations would just make them go through camera footage
Which was a worse scenario for OP

[Anonymous No.9661669]

I fingered a chick at 2am in a dark corner of the beer section of Wal Mart while in college.
What do I win?

[Anonymous No.9661705]

>>9652051
>watch car crash videos on YouTube in front of customers

I dont know why this characterization detail made me laugh so hard

[Anonymous No.9661723]

>>9652985
Whole Foods did that to me. Started out where shifts would have 5 employees and whittled us down to just me.

[Anonymous No.9661802]

>work in bakery
>manager goes on vacation
>"Don't burn the place down while I'm gone!" [insert laugh track]
>First day she's gone, a wiring problem causes a cake display case to catch fire

[Anonymous No.9661805]

>>9661705
Its pure poetry. Mort's life is a wreck

[Anonymous No.9661808]

>>9661802
It was just a prank, bro.

[Anonymous No.9661851]

>>9648521
>>Deli
>young women who aren't pretty enough to be cashiers, plus one or two bossy landwhales

I don't understand this. I work at a grocery store deli and I've been the only fucking man there for years. Why is deli all women?

[Anonymous No.9661869]

>>9632053
the comfiest job i have ever had, but i also was a hard worker

[Anonymous No.9661924]

>>9660224
>get fired for not hitting the panic button
>attempt to enjoy weekend in vegas with like $75
unless you're in very particular ghetto locations, everyone pays with credit and knocking over the store will net you less than working a full shift. if you are working a ghetto store shit's covered with cameras and has a safe drop schedule.

[Anonymous No.9661966]

>>9656009
Thanks, anon

[Anonymous No.9662070]

>>9652051
I knew a few "Morts" working at a grocery store: Those decrepit ancient fucks who've been working at the place for like 40 years that just stopped giving a fuck and are possibly senile and actively cause problem, but have been working there for so long that nobody questions what they do despite constantly proving they need to be in a home.

Entertaining to watch but annoying as fuck when they get in your way.

[Anonymous No.9662108]

>>9649246
excuse me
have any more?

[Anonymous No.9662173]

Worked in a grocery setting for nearly ten years now in two different competing chains.
>Seen old bra less lesbians in tank tops make out.
>Watch a Deli worker come in on her day off wearing a very tight top and again bra less. 62 years old.
>Been told on multiple occasions that I am not allowed to have an opinion.
>Once was fired from one location for using a demo smart phone (new tech at the time) to show a costumer it could be used to check there email. I didn't know there email would be 80% porn.
>Saw a dude get fired after he went to help someone that dropped a six pack of Name Brand Here soda cans. One was leaking one of those small streams of soda. So he put it up to his mouth to keep it from making a larger mess. Fired for stealing soda.
>Watched shopper open several containers of bakery cookies and finger them so they could fine some soft ones.
>One time a dude accidentally hit a gas line in the back room and they wouldn't let us evacuate. Got so dizzy that day.
>One bad ass mofo that works there was working the cardboard baler one day and one of the arms the guild the bale fell down lopped off his pointer finger. He just sat down and calmly called for help. Didn't even flinch once. Was back to work in less than a week.
>I hate children. If you do the job you know why.
>I hate Christmas. If you do the job you know why.
>Tried dating 3 different woman from my work... in my department. Super lucky I haven't gotten trouble for something about that. (Just so you know. I banged 2 of them. Yay me.)
>Did I mention I hate children and Christmas?
>Seen same deli worker from before once drop a pan of food right at costumers feet out on the sales floor. She promptly picked it up, looked at the costumer, said "oops" and then put it in case to sell the floor food. She did not get in trouble.
>Watch that show Superstore (go ahead and judge me). Laugh and sometimes almost cry about how accurate it can be.
Anyway... I have seen too much.

[Anonymous No.9662190]

>>9662173
Their is not the same as there. He said to himself with self hatred in his heart.

[Anonymous No.9662215]

>Work in bakery.
>Store has free cookies for kids.
>Have to give cookies to kids even after they pull their hands out of their underwear.
>Kid proceeds to grab all of my hand before getting to the damn cookie.
>Washed my hands. Just telling you for clarity.
>Another kid.
>This one second knuckle deep in nose.
>Guess what finger is rubbed up and down my hand.
>Wash hands again.
>Another kid.
>Repeat.

[Anonymous No.9662226]

>>9662173
>he was fired for stealing soda

My fukken sides hurt from laughing. I want to screencap this post and work the details into a book or something.

[Anonymous No.9662241]

>Tfw living in small shitty town so the only 24/7 stores are gas stations
I really wanna work nights, but gas stations seem to attract the worst kind of people, any experiences?

[Anonymous No.9662248]

I work retail and I lurk her. I laugh at things that I shouldn't all the time. Pic related.

[Anonymous No.9662268]

>manager was an old pervert
>Hated dealing with customers unless they're a woman in a low cut top/short shorts
>every time the hot chicks walk by
>"God I love summer"

[Anonymous No.9662276]

>>9662268
I miss that guy.

[Anonymous No.9662288]

>mum sends me to wally world to pick up shit for dinner
>go to restroom
>groid savagely parenting child near the sink
>drunken step father fists
>go to krogers

[Anonymous No.9662388]

>>9662215
learn to greentext
>>9662173
you too, learn to greentext. I know you're underage, but you're still fucking old enough to know better

[Anonymous No.9662410]

>>9662388
how does one greentext? ??.

[Anonymous No.9662433]

> be grocery manager at food lion
> get a call from corporate telling me to comply with an internal investigation
> customer had called and complained because the store manager and customer service manager were making out in the parking lot
> both are married dudes, store manager is late 30s with three kids and the CSM is maybe 25 with his first kid on the way
> CSM gets transferred to a new store
> Store manager has been caught doing this before, not the first time he's been caught doing this shit on the clock
> had once nearly gotten fired for "persistent advances" against a male cashier and tried to get them to go to a bar with him
> one of the better baggers (they did cleaning and stocked high volume generics like milk and sugar, dude was chill as fuck) calls corporate and tells them the store manager called him "hot stuff" and whistled at him
> Store manager gets fired and I end up getting promoted to assistant store manager
> I quit like three months later and got a rad government job
> found out last week store manager's wife left him and he killed himself

Dude was fucking weird, like a 5'2" twink.

[Anonymous No.9662464]

>>9662388
What?
>#huh?

[Anonymous No.9662487]

>>9662410
Like
>this

[Anonymous No.9662492]

>>9662464
>#huh?
This isn't Tiwtter nigga.

[Anonymous No.9662498]

>>9662464
>#huh?
This isn't Twitter nigga.

[Anonymous No.9662505]

>>9662498
Bait tastes good don't it?

[Anonymous No.9662529]

>>9636720
This is literally how madcow got spread

[Anonymous No.9662657]

>>>/winco/

>Working customer service
>Hear loss prevention call for backup
>Suddenly 6'6" fatass woman stops by to purchase a bag of ice
>hear LP over radio call for a wait
>Realize fatass is the target of LP
>Fatass goes back to the ice and passes by my spot in CS again
>LP, lead clerks, and old lady manager stop the fatass before the door
>Fatass starts screaming
>Pepper sprays LP
>LP screams louder than anything I've ever heard at work
>Deli in the back of the store heard it
>Everyone dogpiles on the fatass
>I'm leaning over the counter to barely see it
>Another customer walks by all of the mess, oblivious to it all
>Asks to buy a money order
>Have the hardest time trying to call the local PD, lean over the counter to watch, and work MoneyGram machine at the same time
>Customer gives me weird looks while I juggle it all

>Working self-checkout
>Flirting with some regulars
>Wonky lady working CS that day comes over
>She tells me that I'm going outside
>Weird, I head outside the front doors without questioning it
>find short Thai LC outside
>Stand with him, he doesn't tell me anything
>A moment later, LP comes out from her outside door
>"What are you guys waiting for?"
>Follow her in through the in-way
>Hobo with a big package of chicken from the deli coming out
>He sees us, tries to give us the chicken without being grabbed
>LP ignores the chicken, goes for him
>He chucks the chicken at LP
>LP and LC chase him back into the store
>I stay outside because it looks like he will just circle around through the out-way
>LP gets ahold of hobo's hoodie
>Hobo ditches the hoodie, now topless
>Runs at me
>I slam him into a Pepsi machine, we both go down
>He starts to get back up but I grab his leg, family-wrestling style
>He limps a couple steps and falls over
>LP gets on top of the hobo while I am still on his leg
>Customers start to circle the scene
>"Hey, man, he has a knife"
>Cart girl reaches down and takes a huge bowie off of the hobo

I have more, if you want.

[Anonymous No.9662671]

>>9662657
Best part was that I just got up and went back to self checkout. The regulars watched the whole thing. Felt like a badass.

[Anonymous No.9662690]

>>9662657
dude abbreviations lmao

[Anonymous No.9662865]

>>9660677
>it isn't spelled Ladasha.
>It's spelled L--Ah
Holy kek there was litarally some shebawoon bitch at my school who was called Ladasha, except it was spelled L-ah so sub teachers would call her name as "La Ah". It triggered the fuck out of here every time.

[Anonymous No.9663085]

>>9662657
I don't mean to contribute towards the O B S E S S I O N, but I though Americans couldn't physically prevent people from leaving a store without getting sued/arrested. Are you located somewhere else?

[Anonymous No.9663104]

>>9662690
Every single abbrev in this story was incredibly easy to interpret and actually made the writing flow better. Get off the spectrum for a few hours.

[Anonymous No.9663127]

>>9653133
Having a USAA bank account doesn't mean you were or are in the military.

[Anonymous No.9663143]

>>9662865
>It triggered the fuck out of here every time.
>fuck out of here every time
They knew damned well what they were doing.

[Anonymous No.9663297]

>>9632783
You won't say that when a gasoline parasite takes over a truck driver and amish vampire hunters start doing chicken soup injections in the customer toilets.

[Anonymous No.9663432]

>>9662657
LC?

[Anonymous No.9663434]

>>9655465
>i could understand thinking some right winger you once wronged wants your head

Why is that in any way more plausible than his wife plotting against him, faggot nigger retard?

[Anonymous No.9663441]

>>9660658
How is getting a decorated cake 'white trash' you fucking holier than thou maggot?

[Anonymous No.9663525]

>>9632134
If it is, it's not from the Netherlands, Germany or Belgium. They all have beer racks underneath them and are a lot deeper

[Anonymous No.9664054]

>>9663104
na m8 I have no idea what LC means

[Anonymous No.9664117]

>>9663441
Lay off, he's just a self hating faggot who is being racist in the only socially acceptable way in the current year

[Anonymous No.9664149]

>>9648400
But you won't because you're too pussy to do anything for yourselves.

[Anonymous No.9664152]

>>9663434
you done?

[Anonymous No.9664334]

>>9649139
Stocking is awful, most people doing it are druggies or alcoholics, or smell bad
I started my career as one, albeit in retail, learned everything i could as well, and now make 60k as a service manager at lowes with no college.

I have diagnosed anxiety and was when younger diagnosed with aspergers altho im convinced i outgrew most of that, social stuff is hard, i still get scared making phone calls that affect me instead of the business, but you just gotta push through the interaction with customers
My tip is simply to make any steps taken a process you go through each time, its usually the same, and its alot easier to deal with what little individualized interaction is left.
Best of luck

[Anonymous No.9664350]

>>9663127
The license designation is what told him

[Anonymous No.9664432]

>>9662657
>retail at unnamed store
>guy asks to see a gun from over the counter
>whatever, hes an adult with an id and its just a pump shotgun
>working action
>cleared obviously, hand to him
>playing with it for a second
>takes off at a sprint with it
>cant draw on theft only robbery or violence
>we have a signal button for one of the on duty security/lp people to react while other blocks door, not panic button as misunderstandings happen, those are only at register
>most of our lp are numales who have a security license but nothing else
>except one
>fucking rodger, but known as rod
>mid 40s, former marine, collegiate wrestler, 6'7ish, and also about 375
>see him come at a run around corner
>nig with gun fucked up
>rod runs at nog
>chargin souble leg takedown into rack of camo shirts
>rod fired later on for customer suing store for a herniated disk from this

Just realized this is ck not k but whatever enjoy

[Anonymous No.9664519]

>>9663143
I doubt it I went to a pretty white high school she was one of the kids bussed in all the way from Baltimore in this weird group home program. A lot of them were always getting into fights and shit. They weren't all bad though, I played football with a few of the guys and they were good dudes.

[Anonymous No.9664541]

I worked as a cashier once upon a time in a very small town, had some odd people

>normal day at work
>old guy walks in, smells fucking horrible
>comes up to the checkout, plops down some very wet (shittily wrapped by the terrible butcher) pork hocks
>they smell super bad
>old guy smiles at me, he's missing some front teeth, all stained brown
>he smells even worse than the pork hocks
>notice he has a can of ginger ale in his front shirt pocket
>while he's paying, he angles his head down toward the ginger ale can and spits into it
>full of spitting tobacco
>he hands me money and I try not to gag

[Anonymous No.9664548]

>>9664541
oh yeah, forgot to mention the entire lid of the ginger ale can had been removed. I realized too late why that was

[Anonymous No.9664678]

>>9662433
Anon pls delete this

[Anonymous No.9665186]

>>9662433
I want to work CS at FL I've been a cashier for a year and a half. Our CSM is a cunt tho, so im waiting for her to quit and the assistant to be manager. He wasn't offered the job even after doing it fine for a two month period between managers

[Anonymous No.9665759]

>>9635776
>giving them the cash automatically means they won't kill you

[Anonymous No.9665800]

>>9665759
it might not but most guys doing stickups have no desire to commit murder.

[Anonymous No.9666178]

My local Vons as a kid had a midget manager and a bunch of midgets would shop there
> be 6 or seven
> walking through grocery store with dad and sister
> see half man walking down the aisle
> pushing a cart full of baked goods
> my dad recognized him as one of the dwarves from wizard of oz
> tells me quietly
> being the little shit I was I blurt out "hey you were in wizard of oz!"
> he replies in a thick southern accent "yep yes I was I'm a member of the lollipop guild"
> wide eyed me just says "woooow"
> "and what's yer name youngin? Sam Succotash?"
> I'm speechless
> he turns to my dad, points to his cart, and says "no croissants today, boss"
> wheels away