fml

[Anonymous No.9312419]

Ladies and gentlemen, the story you're about to see is true, the names have been changed to protect the innocent.

this thread is for anyone to post a cook-along, bake-along, drink-along, pickle-along or OC food/drink pics, post your meals or what ever if you dont want to make or use another thread

last thread >>9261295

>dickered

[Anonymous No.9312423]

This is looking promising already

[Anonymous No.9312424]

you talk and cook like such a fag, dude

[Anonymous No.9312443]

>>9312423
:)

>>9312424
tubular dooder ill try to start talking and cooking totally bodacious to suit your totes radical needs, dude

[OP No.9312463]

huskin muh 'tillos

https://youtu.be/u9F0I-p7jqI

[Anonymous No.9312466]

what a cute angel kitty in the box

[OP No.9312679]

[OP No.9312683]

if u dont got huge cookie sheets i feel bad for u son

[Anonymous No.9312685]

Welcome back cat-bro

[Anonymous No.9312690]

post more cat

[Anonymous No.9312696]

>>9312690
Id request rare Patti's once the thread had traction, OP seems to appreciate that.

[OP No.9312702]

>>9312690
>>9312696
lol rare pattis dont just appear out of thin air m80s

[Anonymous No.9312709]

>>9312419
Stop posting food and cooking all over my mcchicken board
REEEEE

[Anonymous No.9312713]

>>9312419
H-how many limes?

[Borneo No.9312743]

>>9312419
patti fit in that box so perfectly i thought she was an ingredient

whats the difference between a tomatillo and tomato?

[OP No.9312782]

>>9312743
tomatillo is like a green tomato, but it can never be a red tomato so it bes all it can be, also it has a husk

>>9312713
i try to never spend more than 50 cents on limes

>>9312709
reeeeeeeee

[OP No.9312830]

here is pretty rare in involuntary firefighter patti pls dont share

[OP No.9312836]

wasnt trying to be mysterious im making salsa verde, srry

[Anonymous No.9312842]

>>9312419
Look at all those limes! You know OP has it good.

[Anonymous No.9312846]

>>9312830
the hero we need

[Anonymous No.9312852]

>>9312846
But don't deserve.

[OP No.9312873]

>>9312842
m8, $10 of limes could litterally shut 4chans down forever, pls tread lightly

>throwback giblet

[Anonymous No.9312889]

Made a bread in fancy bread thing.

[Anonymous No.9312891]

>>9312889
That's a very authentic looking bread and bread thing. Do your grandchildren like it?

[Anonymous No.9312917]

>>9312891
>That's a very authentic looking bread and bread thing.
You know it's real because it has French on it.
>Do your grandchildren like it?
Faggy little ingrates, no.

[Anonymous No.9312919]

>>9312889

[OP No.9313018]

ok so 1 jar didnt survive the canning process, 1st time but it unscrewed itself, 4 jars plus some for immediate use aint bad, and it taste good

[Anonymous No.9313028]

>>9312842
I do love a man who knows how to use his SNAP benefits wisely

[OP No.9313044]

>>9313028
m8 if i had a lone star card these threads would be fancy pants as hell

[Anonymous No.9313079]

Crumb shot. I think it kneaded a bit more.

>>9312919
OK.

[Anonymous No.9313082]

>>9313018
I make salsa all the time, you did almost everything that I do but here's a tip
>get a red onion, don't roast it just dice it really fine and add it to the salsa after you're done blending, gives a great texture
>where is the cilantro
>throw a few tomatoes in as well just for volume

[Anonymous No.9314816]

>>9313079
nice

[Anonymous No.9314924]

>>9314816
Sadly no *hiss*.

[OP No.9315725]

Chicken fried steak

[Anonymous No.9315733]

>>9312702
>hurr hurr how can I hold all these limes???

Dumb meme cat.

[Anonymous No.9315991]

aw shit another /dickered/ thread

[Anonymous No.9316000]

>>9315725
Got a recipe for the gravy or is it just chicken drippings + milk + flour and salt? I can never get mine the way I want it to be

[Anonymous No.9316280]

>>9312419
I've been enjoying these cook-alongs. Keep up the good threads, OP.

[Anonymous No.9316426]

>two plates

Are you sharing this meal with a qt or is that plate for patti

[Anonymous No.9316510]

>>9312424
Shut up, fagzor

[Anonymous No.9316565]

>>9313079
one of the gayest posts I have read in a while

[Anonymous No.9317029]

>>9316565
making bread is gay? fuck you

[Anonymous No.9317362]

>>9314816
>>9314924
This made me laugh more than it should

[Anonymous No.9317370]

>>9316565
One of the gayest posts I have read in a while.

[Anonymous No.9317394]

>>9312419
>PBR is back
acceptable thread

[Anonymous No.9317402]

>>9317370
One of the nicest posts I have read in a while.

[Anonymous No.9318806]

>>9313079
looks pretty good

[Anonymous No.9319100]

>>9312702

>walks in litter box
>touches your food

[OP No.9319525]

>>9319100
>his cats don't wash their paws in the sink after using the bathroom
barbaric

[Anonymous No.9320480]

>>9312419
Stop letting your cat on your counter, it's unsanitary.

[Anonymous No.9320686]

>>9320480
Now that someone has finally said it, since everyone else on this board is too cautious to not offend anyone, I'm sure he'll never do it again.

[OP No.9321027]

was gonna make something fancy but got tired and made a ghetto chz quesadilla

[Anonymous No.9321054]

>>9321027
that makes me hungry for nachos desu

[Anonymous No.9321108]

For breakfast I'm having yesterdays leftover barley grains with vegetables fried with an egg.

[Anonymous No.9321613]

Made coffee glazed scones today. Used instant espresso in the scones, in the glaze, and pushed some through a mesh strainer while they were still wet.

Little bitter with the sweetness from the glaze, they're nice.

[Anonymous No.9321618]

>>9321613
Very nice!

[Anonymous No.9321633]

>>9321613
Bottom right reminds me of a liver.

[Anonymous No.9321656]

>>9312424
gayest post on this board

[Anonymous No.9321702]

>>9321108
That makes me want to make fried rice

[Anonymous No.9321771]

I fucking hate this guy, every time this reddit thread pops up I cringe hardcore.

[Anonymous No.9322659]

>>9321613
These look delicious anon

[None !OPIATE9fy. No.9322720]

[Anonymous No.9322732]

almost bought some but was afraid I was falling for a meme

are these really good or should I just get some london broil steak for like 2$ per lb?

also felt a couple rib like bones on them. is this normal?

[Anonymous No.9322790]

>>9312690

[None !OPIATE9fy. No.9323016]

>>9322732
seems like 4chin isn't saviing any of my settings for some reason

[None !OPIATE9fy. No.9323056]

>>9322732
goign to add to this

can I just cover raw sliced eggplant with sauce and bake it?

I tried grilling it and then heating it in a dish with some sauce but the skin was kinda funny

[None !OPIATE9fy. No.9323126]

>>9312419
OP was your pork belly good cooked the way you posted?

I might go back and get some tomorrow

[Anonymous No.9323538]

>>9322790
Dickered cook along guy's cat's name is Patti? That's a pretty cool cat, and one of the two or three decent threads that gets posted in here, along with the cooking challenges.

[OP No.9324370]

went to hubcap grill and had weird burgers and fries, my frito pie burger with an egg was not sloppy enough

[OP No.9324376]

cut me up some chicken fins

https://youtu.be/EA8JNk7IMJ8

[OP No.9324383]

simple brine, will soak the chicken in this for like 30 minutes

[OP No.9324438]

doin some chicken n waffles or something similar

[OP No.9324448]

>>9322732
these look like nicer cuts then the asian market i go to has, anythings worth trying>>9323126 it was def good just follow the recipe and make sure you get the glaze to the right consistency, and it def needs some nodles or rice or something to pair

>mozerplooza

[Anonymous No.9324465]

I'll be having eggs with meat&cheese&vegetables for breakfast.

[OP No.9324487]

>>9312466
>>9312685
>>9315991
>>9312846
>>9312852
:)

>>9312889
thats a dank lookin loaf m8er

>>9313079
/thread

>>9313082
i did put cilantro in just did not document it, i would usually add raw onion at the end if i made it fresh, but i was planning to can most of it so i was like frig off im lazy, ya feels me

>>9315733
im going to assume thats a backhanded complement

>>9316000
i actually got that at a restaraunt, there are diff ways to make cream gravy, like you said but with maybe some pork sausage or bacon and the grease and some black pepper, or sometimes i do a packet gravy cuz im borderline trailer trash

>>9316280
thx m8

>>9316426
if u talking about the chik fried steak i was out with a friend

>>9317394
lol

>>9320480
>>9320686
caint stop wont stop

>>9321054
lol i made it with pepper havarti and it was not authentico

>>9321108
looks p good m8

>>9321613
not sure what the texture of these would be but they look good

>>9321771
rude

>>9323538
patti mayo

>manning the battle station

[Anonymous No.9324498]

>>9324465

[Anonymous No.9324507]

>>9324487
Post the song currently in your head and more patti

[OP No.9324514]

>>9324507
https://youtu.be/XoLyf5w6r4M
listening to this, ill try to get a patti for you before i pass out shes busy right now

>>9324498
looks good i will eat anything with extra green onion, what kinda chz that be

[OP No.9324539]

its friggin caturday, MAKE A MESS

[OP No.9324552]

trying a suggestion i saw on seekay that i should dry chicken thoroughly before dredge stuff

[Anonymous No.9324571]

>>9320480
The cat is more welcome in this thread than you are, get out.

[OP No.9324576]

i shake the chikin in the container with a lid like a madman, this is after the 2nd dredge

[Anonymous No.9324590]

>>9312443
I would steal this cat.

[OP No.9324694]

i am making a maple honey butter sauce

[OP No.9324696]

i do not recommend this if you dont even lift desu

[Anonymous No.9325224]

Fettuccine with a light sauce made from olive oil, red pepper flakes, and marinated garlic/capers and tomatoes roasted and then roughly chopped. Topped with parsley and some parmesan.

Served with a bit of an experiment: braised beef, meat was near the ribs. Low and slow for 2 1/2 hours, finished under broiler to get the sauce sticky, they came out great. Fell apart easily with the side of a fork, but still had some substance to 'em.

>>9324696
Fuck me, that looks hella good. I wish I had the patience to properly soak and bread chicken and deal with all the hassle of frying. I'd greatly reduce my monthly Raisin Cane's tax.

[Anonymous No.9325534]

I came back from vacation in Thursday and hadn't eaten a meal with lots of veggies in ages, so I made some Greek salad, chicken and had some flatbread on the side. The salad had too much pepper and a little too much onion, otherwise tasty.

[None !OPIATE9fy. No.9326556]

don't know how they sold all those from yesterday unless they just repackaged but that seems like a waste of time though

anyways I got one that seemed pretty good

[None !OPIATE9fy. No.9326559]

thick as fuck too

not sure exacly how im gonna dice this up

[None !OPIATE9fy. No.9326743]

made this pumpikn pie in a premade grham cracker crust

not sure what the specs are but I'm going to eal it later tonight

[Anonymous No.9327073]

>>9324696
fuck that looks excellent

[occasional houstonposter No.9327694]

Meat loaf in this oven and several beers in my belly. Also made nice mashed potatoe and brusselsrput

[occasional houstonposter No.9327705]

>>9324696
Damn boy that looks like a nice chicken

[occasional houstonposter No.9327825]

She look nice
Idk why I feminized a meatloaf

[OP No.9328848]

working too much so no cook along cuz im tired, but making some 'naro

[OP No.9328943]

Was ok wasn't salty enough

[Anonymous No.9328968]

>>9323056
Sure, no prob.

[Anonymous No.9329079]

>>9312743

Tomatillos are a lil more tangy and less savory than most tomatoes.

[Anonymous No.9329149]

>>9322720
>formerly chuck's

[Anonymous No.9329492]

If I told you I meant for it to come out this way would you believe me?

[Anonymous No.9329497]

>>9312424
fuck off man.

op i like your threads, i consider them a bright spot on the board, keep it up

[Anonymous No.9329530]

Because I accidentally 2X the sweet potato and couldn't add enough flour in to take up the moisture. It spread out so much that it actually sealed the cloche together and I had to wait for it to cool and shrink so I could see the results, thus the top got a bit done. It's good though.

[Anonymous No.9329538]

So tired of seeing this generic cat and OP's attention whoring threads all over my board.

Fuck off back to /Reddit/ for your attention seeking behavior.

[None !OPIATE9fy. No.9329540]

>>9329492
no

I think my problem was using fast acting yeast or whatever and shoulda just kneded and thrown into loaf pans to rise

it seemed just as dense as some of these breads ive been buying but I guess it shoulda been fore fluffy

[Anonymous No.9329566]

>>9329538
>t. someone who'd rather keep seeing McChucken shilling instead of genuine content
At least OP's trying, which is more than anyone will ever be able to say about you, fella

[Anonymous No.9329982]

3rd thing I've made today with all this sweet potato: sweet potato chocolate cake.

>>9329540
>I guess it shoulda been fore fluffy
Post crumb.

How long did you let it rise the second time?

[None !OPIATE9fy. No.9330008]

>>9329982
>Post crumb
old pic from a couple weeks ago and didn't take anymore

>How long did you let it rise the second time?
I think about an hour

the first rise was about an hour and got really big but then when I took it out and divided into to loaves it didn't rise that much after waiting an hour

I was then reading on some site that you don't need 2 rises with rapid rise yeast so my next loaf im just going to kneed and plop it into loaf pans

[Anonymous No.9330053]

>>9329530
fuck off

[Anonymous No.9330134]

2nd thing I made today with all the sweet potato was this chicken, rice, and sweet potato dish with green peppers, onions, and tomatoes.

>>9330053
Lol.

[Anonymous No.9330323]

>>9329492
Is that a fucking sword?

[Anonymous No.9330460]

>>9330323
>Is that a fucking sword?
No.

[None !OPIATE9fy. No.9330605]

>>9330134
was it any good? looks like it could use some hot sauce

[Anonymous No.9330617]

>>9330605
>was it any good?
Is good. I put cayenne and chili in it so it has some heat, but if I make it too spicy no-one else will eat it.

[Anonymous No.9331476]

Made some double chocolate mint cookies!

Usually 1c semisweet chips, changed it out for 1/2c bittersweet chips and 1/2c chopped bittersweet bar. Also added 2tbsp instant espresso powder.

Mint and chocolate is best combo.

[Anonymous No.9331647]

>>9331476
Also made some popcorn to go with them. Jalapeno chili lime with parm baked on and garlic chips throughout. Yes.

[Anonymous No.9331807]

>>9331647
recipe? That sounds fantastic

[Anonymous No.9331928]

/potatoandleek/
fuck off hiroshimoot, this ain't spam

[Anonymous No.9331944]

>>9331928
I think it was someone on here who told me to crush my garlic cloves with the flat of a knife before chopping
Thank you for the tip kind stranger

[Anonymous No.9331957]

>>9331944
I probably should have peeled the potatoes before this

[Anonymous No.9331977]

>>9331957
Taters gotta catch up a lil

[Anonymous No.9332011]

>>9331977
Using stock cubes cos I'm a lazy cunt
Saved the leek tops to make veggie stock for next time at least

[Anonymous No.9332015]

>>9332011
One of these days I'm gonna buy a bigger pot

[Anonymous No.9332094]

>>9332015
BLENDING TIME

[Anonymous No.9332105]

>>9313018
I can't find anything reputable for learning how to boil-can properly. Is there any books you recommend that goes step by step through the process?

[Anonymous No.9332110]

>>9332094
Back on for a little with some sour cream and a bit of lemon juice

[Anonymous No.9332126]

>>9332110
Awwwwright it's lunchtime

[Anonymous No.9332137]

>>9317402
ZOMFG that's Jack Burton's shirt!

[Anonymous No.9332382]

have you ever thought about opening your own restaurant man? you're a fucking fantastic chef

[Anonymous No.9332576]

>>9331807
I just eyeball the spices but here's the gist of what I do:

Slice 2-3 cloves garlic, brown in oil. Strain oil into stock pot and set aside garlic in a bowl tossed in a bit of salt. Slice 2-3 jalapenos and add into stock pot. Wait a few minutes until the edges are just changing color, then dump in your kernels (I think this batch was ~2/3c kernels). Give it a shake and let it pop.

Zest one lime and set zest aside. Dump popped corn into largest mixing bowl (for tossing) and squeeze half the lime over it. Salt, then add about 2 parts paprika and cayenne to 1 parts onion powder and chili powder. Toss popcorn to mix, then repeat with other half of lime and spices.

Dump corn onto foil covered baking tray. Sprinkle liberally with grated parmesan. Bake in oven 10-15 minutes at 270 (should dry the popcorn back out, as well as brown the cheese a little). When done pour into serving bowl.

Top with dried parsley, red pepper flakes, a little more salt, and the lime zest and garlic chips you set aside earlier.

[OP No.9332583]

>>9327825
this looks comfy as fuck m8

[OP No.9332613]

got most my mooses in place here

Spoiler Alert: makin wings and corn

[OP No.9332617]

[Anonymous No.9332624]

>>9332617
delicious cat 10/10 would eat

[OP No.9332682]

https://youtu.be/a7XL6HE-ls4

[OP No.9332755]

bazinga!

[Anonymous No.9333166]

>>9332755
I'm mirin that corn. What did you doctor it up with?

[Anonymous No.9334196]

>>9332126
this sounds good

[Anonymous No.9334428]

>>9333166
Looks like green onions, parm, and probably cayenne. Does look good though.

[Anonymous No.9335418]

>>9331647
This sounds dope

[None !OPIATE9fy. No.9335423]

roasted this pork belly up and going to chill it so I can slice tomorrow

skin was feeling really hard so not sure if I'll be able to eat it or if any of it will taste good

[None !OPIATE9fy. No.9335428]

maybe I could make some kind of sauce or something this this fat I gathered?

[Anonymous No.9335574]

>>9334428
Those three ingredients are obvious from the image, but I'm more wondering about the glazed sheen they have.

[OP No.9336870]

>>9324590
m8 i am armed pls do not try :)

>>9325224
m8 this is my kinda meal, meat and pasta, this is the food muscles are made of. also frying is easy and honestly not that annoying, getting good at frying is a pain in the dick tho and takes some trial and effort

>>9325534
looks good desu, "too much pepper and onions" is one of my middle names

>>9326743
pumpkin pie is too rich for me no bully\

>>9327073
>>9327705
thx

>>9329492
i want to believe

>>9329497
:)

>>9329538
lol how do u know so much about reddit?

>>9331476
not being sarcastic i could eat more than half of those right now IM HONGRY
>>9331647
AND THIS

>>9332105
i havent read a book in like 10 years but...ive read many different canning tutorials and the consensus seems to be, put yer shit and jars and boil it for 15 minutes, the whole point is to kill botulism, which isnt hard to kill, it might be different depending on what yer canning but with salsa 15 minutes is good, ive done this and me and my buddies have eatin like 10 jars now and nobodies dead yet

>>9332126
im sure the soup is good but that bread is looking good af m8, would rek

>>9332382
all the good stuff in these threads is contributed by fellow anons, if i were to make a restaruant only fat people would eat there because it would be pure beetus

>>9332624
m80 shes gaining enough mass to eat all of us

>>9333166
ok i drained a can of corn and tossed it in some cast iron with some diced serrano pepper and a bit of garlic till i got a bit of char, then i mixed a bit of mayo and sour crema, salt pepper a pinch of cayanne and parm, garnished with some more parm, green onion and a dash of chilli powder, its my take on mex elotes, i change it up often, key ingredients are corn mayo spices and cheese, it will always be good unless you get too redonk

>>9335428
just take shots of it with vodka 50/50 trust me how could it be bad m8

>pic unrelated

[OP No.9336956]

#JustDegenerateThings

[OP No.9337174]

makin some dickered corn doggos

[Anonymous No.9337201]

>>9336956
how do i find this cool looking paper ? not american btw

[OP No.9337223]

>tfw you realize Jack is teaching you how to cook by making the mistakes for you

[Anonymous No.9337258]

>>9337223
I don't know bro
that glass looks a little full

[OP No.9337284]

>>9337258
naw was perfect, thanks to jack, im not a jack poster, but there may be a method to his madness

[OP No.9337347]

ok was way better than i thought itd be

[Anonymous No.9337547]

>>9337201
It's a blunt (cigar) wrap I'm pretty sure.

[Anonymous No.9337550]

>>9337201
Buy cigarillos and hollow 'em out.

[Anonymous No.9337560]

Chicken thighs in a pesto stew topped with pine nut and Parmesan dumplings.

[Food !jpOdInTL8k No.9337629]

>>9312419
Bake along it is

[Anonymous No.9338067]

>>9336870
Garlic Mayonnaise :^)

[Anonymous No.9338261]

About to make breakfast.

[Anonymous No.9338277]

>>9337629
I thought its nostrils were the eyes and it had me all kinds of fucked up.

[Anonymous No.9338740]

>>9336870
>mayo and sour crema
This is what I was curious about, and also what I was afraid of. I might try it and see what to make of it.

>>9337223
What is this? Sausage made with chicken? Or a bratwurst with coarse-chopped spices?

[Anonymous No.9339231]

>>9337347
Looks amazing. Our state fair starts tomorrow, I may have to run in and get me a pronto pup.

[Anonymous No.9339920]

Hey so real talk htown is this Harvey storm gonna bring some fuck or is it all hype? Not OP and I don't normally post in these threads. Just curious, I plan on being in the area.

[Anonymous No.9339940]

>>9339920
Not sure anon. I'm in west Houston, and I'm keeping my guard up. I was here for the March 2016 flooding clusterfuck.

I'm happy I have a job where I can work from home whenever; I'm prepared to stay in until Monday if necessary.

[Anonymous No.9339972]

>>9339940
Yea I work from home too because my home is a semi. But I like to park near Houston on weekends so I can visit my family. Just wondering if maybe I should get parked early and be ready for a long flooded weekend.

[Anonymous No.9340071]

>>9339920
As a fellow Houston anon (actually Wharton), it's going to be almost entirely the water/flooding, not the wind as well like Ike. Right now it's looking like it hits just north of Corpus as a level 1 hurricane with the northern edge of the storm hitting Houston and then rotates into Houston. The winds will probably be <50MPH by the time it reaches the city, but I've heard that the entire city is getting 8 inches of rain minimum with a max somewhere around double that. Park your car someplace high up and get ready for maybe a few days without power.

[Anonymous No.9340080]

>>9324370
That beer is so meh. Such a letdown.

[Anonymous No.9340284]

Popcorn guy back again, I think I've created my magnum opus.

Dry sauteed some sliced button mushrooms and mixed in a little butter and marsala at the end to make a new topping. New favorite thing to add!

Also cooked up some chorizo in the skin, sliced it, browned the slices, and cut it into strips. Made for an okay topping--I think I prefer andouille sausage for this though.

Last new thing I tried, which I feel like a fucking idiot for not trying before, was PAMing the popcorn lightly before I mix in the spices and parmesan. Spray, season, toss, repeat like two more times. Really helped the cheese stick to it and didn't change the flavor profile!

[OP No.9340914]

>>9337201
is just a cigarillo, every cornerstore here has like 200 kinds cuz ghetto

>>9337560
looks pretty good, very nice stove

>>9337629
thats wild, is that fondent stuff taste good? never had it im butter cream all day

>>9338067
i am confuse

>>9338740
its good just dont put too much a little goes a long way, and that sausage was either chicken with poblano and chese or pork jalepeno cheddar, found it in the freezer

>>9339231
thx, i miss fairs:(

>>9339920
meh hurricanes are comfy as fuck unless you live somewhere like the coast or along buffalo bayou etc, itll flood a bit and blow a few trees over, imma stock up on beer, smoke and groceries and propane and throw a party

>>9340080
ya not really impressive, the brewery is pretty cool tho

>>9340284
dank, might have to try making some fancy or savory popcorn soon

[Anonymous No.9340932]

>>9340284
>hey guys try my mushroom hotdog popcorn

[OP No.9341009]

waiting on this beef to thaw and doing dishes, i havent went to the store in a while so im still deciding what to do with what i have

[Anonymous No.9341026]

Cat pics, the new CP.

[Anonymous No.9341066]

>>9341009
Post moar Patti in the meantime.

[OP No.9341112]

>>9341066
>>9341026
:^)

k got most dishes done and bout ready to start, just gonna do some basic bitch wifey material

[OP No.9341242]

work to do

[OP No.9341253]

mozz n' palooza

[OP No.9341263]

this smeels pretty decent im enthusiastic about this batch

[OP No.9341339]

these are pretty much personal meatloafballs

[OP No.9341378]

[OP No.9341458]

i burnt the shit out of my arm it wasnt worth it

[Anonymous No.9341474]

>>9341458

at least you made some nice faggots

[Anonymous No.9341511]

>>9319100
OP like toxoplasmosis

[OP No.9342286]

>>9341474
Lol

[Anonymous No.9342853]

>>9340914
>>9338067
Patti (garlic) Mayonnaise m8. It's a condiment.

[Anonymous No.9342865]

[Anonymous No.9342868]

Rolled it out much flatter than I've done previously

[Anonymous No.9342875]

Covered and milk, then cinnamon sugar. This is the part where I always roll the middle too large and the sides awfully, and immediately forget to correct for this the next time I make this bread.

I did manage to make a tighter roll this time though so that's nice

[Anonymous No.9342878]

The trick here is to face away the ugly parts of each loaf away from the camera so it looks like you're much better and took way more time forming proper loafs than you really did

[Anonymous No.9342883]

Still need to work on a tighter roll, there's a bit of air gap the further towards the middle you go. Otherwise, happy with how it came out!

[Anonymous No.9342896]

>>9313079
Wow, that looks great!

[Anonymous No.9342900]

>>9312419

OP are you in college? The bachelor vibe makes me nostalgic for my old uni days

[Anonymous No.9342906]

>>9312889
What is that bread thing... I've been looking for one, but don't know exactly what to look for. Can someone give me any ideas?

Is it a dutch oven? Cast iron? I've seen really light weight ones, but for some reason, I have the feeling it needs to be heavy duty.

[Anonymous No.9342933]

>>9342865
>>9342868
>>9342875
>golden raisins
Monica.

>>9342878
>The trick here is to face away the ugly parts of each loaf away from the camera so it looks like you're much better and took way more time forming proper loafs than you really did
Word.

>>9342883
Well done Anon; looks very appetizing.

>>9342906
>What is that bread thing... I've been looking for one, but don't know exactly what to look for. Can someone give me any ideas?
It's this: https://www.williams-sonoma.com/products/emile-henry-bread-cloche/

[Anonymous No.9342938]

>>9342933
>$130
Damn... Well, in the long run it will be worth it. Learned that it's ceramic I'm looking for. Thanks.

[Anonymous No.9342945]

>>9339920
Having seen plenty of flooding in htown in my time, I gotta say, we could legitimately be fucked.
If harv really brings the rain, or fucking forbid, stalls out, we gon be fucked.

Or it might just blow on through, luck of the draw.

[Anonymous No.9343223]

>>9342900
I'm pretty sure he's working on construction site, above 30 and forever alone.

[Anonymous No.9343256]

Casual Patti coming through

OP can we get a selfie? How about a foot? No socks. Even pinky would do it

[Anonymous No.9343366]

>>9329149
underrated cross meme post

[Anonymous No.9343439]

>>9337629
impressive shaun of the sheep 10/10 nice job

[OP No.9344888]

>>9342853
:^) took me a minute lol

>>9342878
>>9342883
this shit looks p dank m8ers, Id probably try making french toast with it cuz beetus is on my bucket list

>>9342900
I am highly uneducated but Im def bachelor for life or until proven otherwise

>>9342945
at this point ill be dissapointed if it blows over, im ready for some comfy dickered hurrican cooking

>>9343223
im not in construction, am over 30 and i have cats ill never be alone:)

>>9343256
my feet do not belong on a cooking board they are too manly

trying to decide on something to cook i got a few groceries earlier and some fuel for my camping stove in case power goes out

[Anonymous No.9345852]

>>9342883
this looks very appealing

[Anonymous No.9346491]

OP i save every Patti picture u post in my Patti folder, is that too weird? Also it's platonic

[Anonymous No.9347591]

OP are you underwater yet? Please stay safe, we need you to post more cats.

[Anonymous No.9347781]

RIP OP

[OP No.9348223]

>>9347591
>>9347781
will prob be ok...

[Anonymous No.9350049]

>>9342883
very nice

[Anonymous No.9350524]

Marinating my stakes for dinner. Squash, steak and potato. Also we need a /dickered/ Discord.

[Anonymous No.9350613]

I got some delicious corn today that I'm going to grill. problem is I didn't plan anything other than that. Quick/easy/simple things to grill? I guess a steak is an option

[Anonymous No.9350740]

>>9350613
How about some grilled zucchini?

Or some grilled pineapple?

[Anonymous No.9350785]

Bourbon and ribs ready for the grill
booze is almost legal

[Anonymous No.9350789]

>>9350785
what kinda stubbs is that?

[Anonymous No.9350805]

>>9348223
good luck. I survived matthew in GA, lol. Good luck with harvey

[OP No.9350908]

pretty weak hurricane desu senpai

heres some texmex from yesterday

[OP No.9350913]

gonna make some chicken chow mein

[OP No.9350920]

just kind of improvising here gonna let this marinate a while

[OP No.9351427]

[OP No.9351438]

[OP No.9351723]

[Anonymous No.9351793]

>>9351723
It seems I was worried for nothing. Looks great, OP. I wish my dinner was half as good.

[OP No.9351902]

>>9351793
it was p decent but that was just a late lunch, will start on dinner soon

also that fight was pretty lackluster

[Food !jpOdInTL8k No.9352101]

>>9338277
Yeah I was told that before - but honestly, i totally didnt see it myself while making it!

>>9342853
Fondant it is - and personally i dislike the taste. Im more in for marcipan, but fondant is way more easy to work with.. Soo...

>>9343439
Why thank you!

[OP No.9352281]

so i thawed this chicken and decided to try beer can chicken, was looking at some recipes and just gonna do my own thing

i almost did guy fierri's recipe where he stuffs bacon strips in its neck hole so that it looks like a wig

[OP No.9352288]

this improv dry rub smells dank

[Anonymous No.9352296]

>>9352288
Why is that bottle upside down?

[occasional houstonposter No.9352307]

Op how are you doing in this storm? I'm safe and prepared, but it looks like my house is about to take some water, I hope you're luckier.

[Anonymous No.9352318]

>>9340284
how do you even eat that without getting your hands super nasty?

[OP No.9352372]

>>9352307
i got booze, herbal products, food and guns ill be good lol, i dont think itll come in my apt but im prepared to get everything of value off the ground, definitely raining hard

patti aint bout dat tropical weather

[OP No.9352380]

the whole beer can chicken pose makes the chicken seem a bit self aware which makes it awk

[Anonymous No.9352526]

>>9352318
It's really not as bad as you'd think. The way everything is covered in a baked light layer of parm, and the fact that I'm cooking most of the liquid out of the toppings to begin with, makes it more than dry enough to not get crap everywhere.

Also helps that I'm not grabbing handfuls at a time, I guess, and just finger picking out of the bowl?

[OP No.9352641]

[OP No.9352678]

[OP No.9352683]

was pretty good

[Anonymous No.9352776]

>>9324696
How'd you become such a good cook

[Anonymous No.9352847]

>>9352776
He's a mediocre cook. My mom cooks better. At least here in Europe we call that style home cooking. He can't even make bone marrow dumpling soup

[Anonymous No.9352928]

>>9352683
That looks damn good, my man.

[Anonymous No.9352944]

>>9352847
Pfft, here on the internet he's the worst cook ever to touch food and we're all celebrated Micheline studded James beard bearded wonder chefs.

[Anonymous No.9353335]

>>9342883
you have a recipe?

[Din dins No.9353371]

I only post cook along in Dickered© brand threads, containing 100% rare Patti™

I tell my butcher and my brothel madam the same thing, "three, extra thick"

[Din dins No.9353377]

>>9353371
But first some [pan] roast veggies.

[Din dins No.9353379]

>>9353377
Sweet potato and beetroot too

[Din dins No.9353393]

Mmmm

[Din dins No.9353411]

Tater dolphin wars

I've got the best recipe if you want.

[Din dins No.9353418]

Some thyme butter for finishing the steaks.

[Din dins No.9353426]

Daufs done
Doesn't look too pretty but it's super tasty.

[Din dins No.9353432]

The fun part

[Din dins No.9353443]

Pan sauce with mushrooms while they rest.

[Din dins No.9353456]

Looks without the sides and sauce.

[Din dins No.9353462]

Gets kinda messy with the sides and sauce.

[Din dins No.9353484]

Over cooked a little for me but that's the trade off for a good sear when using a shitty domestic stove. One day I'll put a proper commercial one in. Still tasted great, steak and potato's man its a classic.

[Anonymous No.9353606]

>>9353484
Looks good but holy fuck get a better camera.

[Jerk chicken No.9353705]

I'm going to be smoking some jerked chicken tomorrow but this is the prep for my jerk paste rub. I ground the spices from whole and they are clockwise, allspice, cloves, cinnamon, nutmeg and black pepper. I have additional flavorings of thyme, chives, onion, garlic, ginger, lime juice, brown sugar, salt, soy sauce and scotch bonnet peppers (absolute must, no substitutions).

[Jerk chicken No.9353718]

>>9353705
Blended it all into a paste and coated my chicken legs in the paste and will leave in the refrigerator and smoke tomorrow afternoon. The paste tasted great with the fiery heat of the peppers, the hot spices and rounded out with the sweetness of the sugar. Really complex blend of flavors.

Will post smoking and results tomorrow.

[Anonymous No.9354011]

>>9353335
http://www.food.com/recipe/worlds-best-cinnamon-raisin-bread-not-bread-machine-98867

I don't know about "world's best" but if you're into cinnamon and raisins it's really good. The recipe calls for 1c of raisins, I did more like 2-2 1/4c (used the rest of my black and gold raisins together). Also calls for 8c flour, I reserved like half a cup for kneading, it's pretty darn sticky at first.

The first time I made it, I added a tbsp of cinnamon to the bread itself to give it more flavor. I skipped that this time and I think it might be better without (following the original recipe)--makes the swirls stand out more.

Also like I said I rolled it flatter than they suggested because I wanted to go nuts with the swirls.

Lastly, they say to bake 45 minutes. I did mine for 30 minutes and all but the VERY middle was cooked through, and the doughy texture might also be attributed to the bunching of wet dough since I rolled it so flat. I'm trying to say just start checking at 30 minutes not 45. Maybe 35.

Good luck, post pics if you make it!

[Anonymous No.9354134]

Pulled a hard chef Boy 'r Dumb. Don't have pictures but I just fucked up hard on making a old fashioned cornish pastie. I probably had too much flower in it and when it came time to fucking roll it out to add filling it was so dry and flaky it was literally impossible to flatten and smooth any of it out. Fucking wasted a fair bit of time in setup and dishes doing that but whatever, learning experience. I plan on getting myself a new food scale tomorrow to replace the one that died on me a few months back and attempting again. I don't think I added enough lard to the mixture as well since I had to fucking wing it. Got so pissed off I have a fucking pile of mushrooms, potatoes, and and onion diced fine and sitting in a bowl all spiced up and nothing to do with them.

[Anonymous No.9354426]

Take care op. Lock and load and take care of patti

[Anonymous No.9354437]

>>9352847
Good cook or not is almost irreverent. He is motivated to cook. Do you cook everyday? Keep up the good work op.

[Anonymous No.9354667]

>>9352847
Okay go make something that looks better than what he does

[Anonymous No.9354924]

>>9354437
Yeah i do cook every day but I don't need internet groupies to tell me i did a good job.
OP's name is Kevin or Tim, or something like that, has Mexican friends, does some maintenance job and does photography part time or yelp reviews
Hahaha

[Anonymous No.9354958]

Hope OP and any other lurking Texas bros are safe. Every news outlet is making it sound like the end of the fucking world down there.

[Anonymous No.9355570]

>>9312419


OP, I'm just some guy but I noticed you get a lot of hate for these threads. Keep it up, I cook every night because of you. You and Patti are living the dream, peace out.

[Anonymous No.9355591]

>>9353393
are those raw, or are you just doing that for colour? if they're raw, damn, how long did those take to cook?

[Anonymous No.9355851]

>>9312419
are you flooded?

[OP No.9355988]

>>9352776
this guys>>9352847 mom taught me :^)

>>9352928
thx

>>9352944
lol

>>9353371
>>9353484
nice lookin steaks, need to get me a steak soon

>>9353718
monitoring

>>9354134
thats annoying bro

>>9354426
dont worry we gon hol it dine

>>9354924
i do have some mexican friends but you are incorrect about everything else

>>9355570
:)

>>9355851
>>9354958
it is a lot worse for some people than others, Im ok so far, i feel bad for some of these people, if the power goes out the party is over tho

[Anonymous No.9357150]

>>9352641
>>9352683
That chicken looks good, and those brussels look great too, just how I like them. But that pot looks like it'll be a cunt to clean.

>>9351723
You like asain cooking dickered? This and the pork thingy from the other thread.

>>9321613
You're the same dude who made the coffee biscutes last thread aren't you?

>>9355591
They're coloured in the pan then I throw the rest of the veggie in the pan and let it roast in the oven, it takes about 10mins in the pan and 35mins in the oven to cook through and crisp nicely. I think its the best way to get the flavor out of the spices when they're still seeds. You can do the carrots the whole way in the oven but it will take more like an hour and a half

>>9354011
Ty, Im getting into bread and rolling loaves is definitely a weak point for me.

>>9353606
Its just the camera on my phone, so I probably won't.

[Anonymous No.9357819]

>>9357150
>You're the same dude who made the coffee biscutes last thread aren't you?
Yep, and the cinnamon bread is me too. And the nonsense popcorns you might see pop up from time to time!

Agreed on the rolling. I need to bake more bread to get used to it, but it's difficult for me to bake bread often when I really don't eat it that often and it goes bad so quickly.

[Jerk chicken No.9358062]

>>9353718
Just put the jerk chicken that I marinated overnight in the smoker at 275F. Should take 2-3 hours. I'll probably pull after 2 hours and finish in the oven to crisp the skin. Ideally I'd be smoking with pimento wood but I'm using plum. You might be able to see in the pic I added some bay leaf and allspice berries to the water tray.

[Jerk chicken No.9358584]

>>9358062
I didn't even put them in the oven since I got dickered and should have pulled them 30 minute ago because they are already at 170F and I'm afraid they'll dry out. I bit one and I really like it. The 2 scotch bonnets add some heat but it perfectly accentuates the other spices. Not overpowering at all. Really a nice change of pace.

Good luck on your flood, patti's dad.

[Anonymous No.9358854]

How's Patti squad holding up? Update us OP

[Anonymous No.9359726]

>>9352641
Any good recipe for that beer can chicken?

[Anonymous No.9359792]

Tonight I'm just making a casserole, but my roommates go wild for it.

>two bscb, cooked up in some oil then shredded
>finely dice & sautée: half yellow onion, 2 serrano peppers, 4 cloves garlic
>steam 2 crowns broccoli, chopped
>2 cups white rice (sometimes cooked in homemade veggie stock but lazy tonight)
>roux w/ two giant handfuls of shredded cheddar and tonight like 6 oz fontinella
>combine in glass casserole dish, top w/ panko, bake at 350 for 20 mins

Add salt, pepper, little dried mustard, paprika and cayenne. Tasty af.

[Anonymous No.9360026]

Listen here you ding dongs. I'm about to show you how a real man cooks.

[OP No.9360044]

well m8s, waters rising, getting hit hard, tonight might be the night

[Anonymous No.9360063]

>>9360044
>the next dickered thread is posted by Patti as she eats OP

[Anonymous No.9360065]

>>9360044
I want you to man up to that storm. I want you to run straight into them bullets.

[Anonymous No.9360074]

>>9360044
Jesus, brace yourself. At least you got some sweet dubdubs.

[Anonymous No.9360166]

>>9360044
Fuuuck stay safe OP, hope to see you cooking again soon.

[OP No.9360171]

>>9360063
>>9360065
>>9360074
>>9360166
m80s 20 years ago I won a trophy on swim team, ill be fine lol

im about to make nachos or scotch eggs, next post decides, or in like 5 minutes imma do whatever i want

[Anonymous No.9360203]

>>9360171
I'm just worried about your house getting fucked up, apparently the flooding is only going to get worse :(. Hope Patti stays dry.

[Anonymous No.9360231]

>>9312419
me on the left

[OP No.9360248]

k im hurricane dickered, in h town we call it flooded, gonna do my best to turn turds into gold here cuz im very limited on supplies and every store is closed

[OP No.9360277]

https://youtu.be/Jt2qgJt93Y0
this my comfy stormy weather music

[OP No.9360376]

salvaged some of my herbs

[OP No.9360381]

houston we have some problems

[Anonymous No.9360415]

Glutens.

[Anonymous No.9360457]

>>9357819
Reeeee
Why didn't I pinch the seam better. Anyway still tasted good.

[Anonymous No.9360467]

Also souffles. Bread and souffles are good on a day off.

[Anonymous No.9360567]

>>9358584
That looks so good, smokeing is my next thing after i figure out this bread business.
>>9360415
tell me more about your glutes for the slutes
>>9360381
if Patti wants to make an omelette

[Anonymous No.9360621]

>>9360567
You won't regret getting into smoking. Makes a great excuse to hang around outside and get dickered while you feel like you're accomplishing something.

[OP No.9360659]

>>9360457
bro m8, that bread looks dank id make a cheesy griller with that shit for real

>>9360467
is this like flan ive never had suffle

[OP No.9360666]

so meant to do 3 but for frig snax i cant peel a egg right for shit. i got 2 and they gonna be thicc

[OP No.9360753]

[OP No.9360761]

the struggle is real

[Anonymous No.9360917]

>>9339972
What does your kitchen look like?

[Anonymous No.9361048]

>>9360567
>tell me more about your glutes for the slutes
—2 cups T55 flour, 1 cup T65 flour, 1/2 tsp salt sifted together.
—2 3/4 tsp yeast; 1/4 cup "maple syrup" (cheap artificially-flavored corn syrup) to feed yeast; 1/2 cup warm water. Let sit for 10 minutes.
—Combine flour and yeast; add another 1/4-1/2 cup warm water. Knead 5-6 minutes to form a nice elastic dough.
—Plop dough in greased bowl for 20 mins to rise, then punch down, knead a little bit then flatten out
—brush melted butter on flattened dough, then sprinkle with cinnamon sugar, roll up dough, form into loaf
—place in cloche to rise for 30 mins; pre-heat oven to 450°F, bake for 30 minutes
—remove from oven, remove cloche and let cool
—shitpost your bread on 4chan

[Anonymous No.9361543]

>>9360248
Hope you've got plenty of supplies left. Looks like it might be awhile before those stores open back up.
Best of luck to you and Patti.

[Anonymous No.9361740]

>>9312873
is that a new cat?

[Anonymous No.9361748]

>>9312917
you get yr le creuset at sur la table?

[Anonymous No.9361754]

>>9313079
Is that can't elope directly on the cat counter?

yucko!

[Anonymous No.9361839]

>>9360457
I love this! What a fun loaf.

Currently working on an "American style" biscotti I saw on kingarthurflour. Added some leftover toasted pecans from my sis's bday cake and some cinnamon, and some demerara sugar on top because I have to get rid of this huge bag somehow.

How do I avoid this cracking on top, anyone know? I smoothed out both logs with wet fingertips pretty well, I thought... dough seemed really firm and sticky too.

[Anonymous No.9361850]

>>9361839
The first time I made biscotti it broke all over the damn place when I went to cut it after the first bake. The only thing that could've been more broken was my heart while it was happening.

This time I remembered a tip someone told me, to cover it with a wet towel while it cools a bit before cutting. Also tried using literally zero downward pressure with my serrated, just a light back and forth.

[Anonymous No.9361858]

>>9361850
The tips worked great. I only lost one piece to cracking and ate it before the shame set in.

[Anonymous No.9361867]

>>9361748
Omelette du fromage.

>>9361754
U r dum.

>>9361839
>How do I avoid this cracking on top, anyone know?
Score the top to control the direction of expansion as it rises.

Looking very very tasty there, sconebro.

[Anonymous No.9361891]

>>9361867

>Omelette du fromage.

haha! it's funny because childhood cartoon!

[Anonymous No.9361900]

>>9361839
what's the consistency before the second bake?

[Anonymous No.9361906]

>>9361858
THICC

[Anonymous No.9361943]

>>9360171
Scotch eggs

[Anonymous No.9361965]

That feeling when you make it all fit on one cooling rack. I ate two of the end pieces after they cooled and they're good! The demerara sugar was actually a nice touch. Not near as hard as regular biscotti but the recipe said it wouldn't be, and I'm okay with that. Should dry out a little more when it fully cools.

>>9361867
That's a great tip, I can't believe I didn't think of that.

>>9361900
It was like a semi dry cookie. Little crumbly. I only remembered to put the wet towel on like 2 minutes before I was done cooling it (15 total) so that moistened the crust a little. Next time I'll do it at least 5 minutes before it's done, and leave the second "loaf" covered while I cut the first.

>>9361906
Yes

[Anonymous No.9363009]

>>9360063
Hahaha this made my day, and i had a pretty crappy day!

[Anonymous No.9363028]

>>9312782
How long should you roast tomatillos for? I've recently started using them and they're amazing. I bet roasting would make them even better. Or are you broiling them?

I like to hit them with a little agave nectar if they end up too sour.

[Anonymous No.9363114]

Just saw some news from H town, hope you and Patti are okay

[Anonymous No.9363832]

>>9363028
I broil tomatillos for a few minutes in the oven, usually about 6-7 minutes total. Just check them after 3-4 mins and move them around/flip if they're not cooking evenly. Cooking them definitely takes out a bit of the sourness but still leaves a warm tang. My favorite recipe with them is chicken pozole verde, pic related.