/ck/ - Food & Cooking

[Anonymous No.6976299]

Quite often the theme of "British food" comes up on /ck/.

Pic related is the 21st birthday meal of one of my friends (I'm British)

Now that is real food.

[Anonymous No.6976303]

That looks like a large spread of below average food.

[Anonymous No.6976308]

>>6976303

Well yeah that's...pretty much exactly what this is.

Bear in mind this is for a 21st birthday party, not a ten year-old's.

[Anonymous No.6976319]

>>6976299

>I have to try so fucking hard on a Vietnamese shoe tailoring mailroom about how my inbred country's cuisine shouldn't be labeled as the worst food in the world.

Why are you so obsessed, Atharv?

[Anonymous No.6976322]

>>6976299
This looks like a mid 90's buffet at someones wake

[Anonymous No.6976360]

Looks bland with some kebab infulence tbh fam

[Anonymous No.6976371]

>>6976360
>tbh fam
Fuck off back to plebbit. FAM SMH IMO TBH [insert smiley face here]

[Anonymous No.6976379]

>>6976299
That's the kind of spread cheap hotels put out for free lunch snacking - right after they pack away the continental breakfast of frozen waffles and old cereal.

[Anonymous No.6976380]

>>6976299
i'm sorry you're friends with pikeys lad

[Anonymous No.6976383]

That's pretty pleb, I hope you got lots of booze.

[Anonymous No.6976386]

>>6976299
I'm a Brit as well OP and this is pretty much typical of a birthday type buffet but what are those things next to the 'diet coke' tins?

[Anonymous No.6976388]

>>6976299
Don't you have a good Chinese delivery place nearby?

[Anonymous No.6976394]

>>6976299

>Bowl of Minstrels

Well I now know how I'm going to wind up hating myself later tonight.

[Anonymous No.6976395]

>>6976299
english here. that is fucking shit food and your friends are poor.

[Anonymous No.6976399]

If I remember right, my 21rst BDay dinner was pancakes & bacon.

[Anonymous No.6976403]

>>6976395

How is it shit? All the best comfort foods on one table

[Anonymous No.6976405]

>>6976403
see
>>6976379

[Anonymous No.6976411]

>>6976399
Mine was worse mate, I had moved from my parents and got my own place, after a night out with the lads, I was carried home and dumped in a chair . . .. I woke up a few hours later and tried to cook some sprats that a neighbour gave me . . . .I was so pissed most of them fell on the floor . .. I fell asleep again, halfway through eating them . . . .the cat had finished the lot and had puked them up in my living room . . . .great times!

[Anonymous No.6976413]

>>6976411
Learned that lesson at 19.

The pancakes, while being fluffy & tasty, soaked up alcohol like a mfucker.

[Anonymous No.6976451]

>>6976413
There is no way I could attempt to make pancakes after a night out, If I can't grab a take-away on the way home it's cereal or a ketchup sandwich . . .or something like that.

I am a bit bemused as to what the bag is next to the drink cans in OP's picture . . .also the knife is strategically placed covering the cheese label?
Something is not quite right here.

[Anonymous No.6976470]

>>6976451
>>6976386

[Anonymous No.6976486]

I had this amazing mushy peas and chips from a shop local to me. It's fast food, but it's damn tasty.

[Anonymous No.6976494]

>>6976470
This product is Australian . . .it's not British at all

Op- is an Aussie shitposter . .. . the cans of drink didn't look familiar, neither did the packet of cheese!

We've been duped!

[Anonymous No.6976496]

>>6976486
This was posted on another thread earlier . . .please try harder.

[Anonymous No.6976507]

>>6976494

You can see the union jack on the cheese you fucking idiot

[Anonymous No.6976509]

>>6976494

The cheddar has a union flag on it and you can just about make out that there's a packet of tesco edam.

Most of these 'brit cuisine' threads are just one aussie shitposter though.

[Anonymous No.6976512]

>>6976509

Tbh I'm a brit and my friend posted this on facebook today so I thought it would be funny to say this is what british food is

[Anonymous No.6976517]

>>6976507
>You can see the union jack on the cheese you fucking idiot
That means nothing, it's obviously imported but the main label is hidden.>>6976509
You can't deny that it's not genuine . .. . I had my suspicions earlier, look through my posts.

[Anonymous No.6976546]

>>6976299
Stop in the name of the queen! Do you have a license for that pointy stabby lad?

[Anonymous No.6976558]

>>6976371

>obsessed and triggered

easy there tumblr

[Anonymous No.6976565]

>>6976486

>fish tendie with some shit and boogers on it

PRIDE AND JOY OF BRITANNIA

NOT FOR KINDERGARTNERS ANYMORE

ALL THE WORLDS SPICES AND ROBBERY BUT NEVER USED; THE BRITISH WAY

[Anonymous No.6976570]

>>6976546

"J...Just a half knob of safety-scissors Sgt. Rakim, please we had to forage for it in the lorry"

[Anonymous No.6976582]

>>6976299
>plain store-bought bread slices with a tub of butter or, more likely, not butter
>plain white rice
>plain crackers
>a brick of low-end grocery store cheddar
>a bowl of black olives
>torn-up slices of cold cuts that are obviously from one of those big processed loafs of meat

guaranteedreplies.jpg

[Anonymous No.6976584]

>>6976565

What the fuck is that image? Is that Picard?

[Anonymous No.6976592]

>>6976299
You must really hate your friend.....

[Anonymous No.6976593]

More bongland food, please.

[Anonymous No.6976596]

>Not having a full English for tea everyday.

You might as well be Irish.

[Anonymous No.6976609]

>>6976593

No I'm not kidding.

[Anonymous No.6976613]

>>6976596
>implying Irish breakfast is not superior

[Anonymous No.6976633]

>>6976613
>Irish breakfast
No such thing . . .. The Irish renamed 'Full English' to full irish . . .only because they don't like English stuff or the connotations.

You have an Irish stew . . .just be content with that.

[Anonymous No.6976685]

My aunt made this amazing meat pie for our family event last summer. I've had anything like it before

[Anonymous No.6976700]

>>6976685

Your aunt's pie looks very similar to the one already posted in the disgusting food/british food shitposting thread.

Is /ck/ the new home of riley or something?

[Anonymous No.6976723]

[Anonymous No.6976752]

>>6976723
I don't understand why this is served with dainty little swirls of mashed potato? . . . Toad-in-the-hole is good hearty food and should be served with a good dollop of mash, peas or other veg. WTF?

[Anonymous No.6976848]

>>6976752
it's probably a restaurant's attempt at making old classics"fancy"

[Anonymous No.6976862]

>>6976700
No, Rileys posting style, method of attack and subjects are completely different.

Americans are just obsessed with Britain.

[Anonymous No.6976918]

>>6976723
What's that called?
Looks good

[Anonymous No.6976929]

>>6976848
Those are duchess potatoes, a mixture of mashed potato and egg yolk.

[Anonymous No.6976938]

I can't believe you guys are ignoring the fact that this is "british" but you can clearly see a knife in the OP photo.

This is poor trolling at best.

[Anonymous No.6976950]

>>6976862
>Someone makes a joke about MY COUNTRY?
>THEY MUST BE OBSESSED WITH HATRED FOR US

You guys know we have "lol american" threads literally every day, right?

[Anonymous No.6976954]

>>6976918
The pastry and sausage thing toad-in-the-hole, pic related

>>6976938
I don't get this knife meme

[Anonymous No.6976963]

>>6976938
Despite the memes, it's not illegal to own a knife, an 18 year old carrying one into a nightclub or walking the streets might be a different matter but in context or in the home it's fine!

It's not British anyway .. . this is a picture from Australia!

[Anonymous No.6976967]

>>6976954
It's a nanny-state thing

[Anonymous No.6976974]

>>6976963

Why the fuck do you think this is Australian. I'm British and I hate Aussies.

[Anonymous No.6976981]

>>6976963
So you're telling me that an adult has no right to carry a pocket knife with him?

I've used mine four times today. You guys must not get anything done.

[Anonymous No.6976982]

>>6976967
Got that image of them emptying one of those out and it's full of garbage or the one where they're showing off it's success with a handful of butter knives and broken screwdrivers?

[Anonymous No.6976985]

>>6976981

You can't carry a knife for no reason (reasons include "I'm having a picnic" etc.) unless it's a knife with a folding blade and 3 inches long

[Anonymous No.6976990]

>>6976974
Where did you get those Corn Thins?
and what is in those cans . . .also what is that cheese, why the label is hidden by the knife? . . .the packaging doesn't look familiar!

[Anonymous No.6976996]

>>6976985
What a bunch of pussies.

>"oh man, this guy is gonna stab me because his knife is four inches long"
>"wait never fear, his knife is actually only three inches long, another safe day for all in Britannia"

[Anonymous No.6977003]

>>6976981
>So you're telling me that an adult has no right to carry a pocket knife with him?
No I am not saying that.

Cops aren't too bad here and if you are a decent sort of chap and you have a reasonable explanation, going Fishing, camping, carpet laying, a chef, etc they are OK . . . .but if you are with a gang of guys or acting dodgy enough to warrant them to approach you, then you could be in trouble.

Most of these 'weapons sweeps' you see on 4chan are on rough nigger council estates, where weapons are stashed behind bushes, walls, etc.

[Anonymous No.6977016]

>>6977003
How about a reasonable explanation like
>"I need this to cut stuff, I don't know what stuff yet, because I haven't gotten to it, but I might need it."
Why should you be barred from having something you might need?
This also applies to firearms.

[Anonymous No.6977026]

>>6976985
Does "I'm a free-ass fucking adult that wants to cut things if the need arises" count as a reason?

[Anonymous No.6977031]

>>6976996
yeah, we had a massive surge in knife crime after all our guns got banned, so they introduced some pretty strict knife laws. that's actually the reason under-18s can't buy cutlery as well

[Anonymous No.6977043]

>>6976996

A knife of 3 inches or under is unlikely to penetrate an organ. Repairing organs is expensive, and our government pays for that.

Could your government afford to pay for all those stabbed organs?

Oh wait.

[Anonymous No.6977056]

>>6977043
Here's a CT scan of some lungs, you can clearly see they would be penetrated by a 3 inch knife.

Next.

[Anonymous No.6977066]

>>6977016
Ok let me explain.
If a cop decides to search you in Britain, it's not because they are bored but they have a 'spidey sense' that you are up to no good!

Using excuses such as "I want to cut stuff" has no bearing in a high street, night club, or with a gang of mates.

The cops here are not stupid as seeing as I am over 50, they would have no problem with me, unless I am covered in tattoos, drunk and being an ass, yes there are laws but they use their discretion.

[Anonymous No.6977082]

>>6977056

Can you even read?

[Anonymous No.6977083]

>>6977043
everyone in your country with serious illness comes to America to get treated, your health care sucks

[Anonymous No.6977090]

>>6976633
There is a full Irish it has many similar components to that of an English but is subtly different. Their sausages are pish, white pudding is not very nice and Irish black pudding is just a shadow of its colonial counter part.

Northern Irish breakfast is OK but again kinda meyh. The addition of fried pancakes is good but not a game changer.

Full English is nice but just lacks an edge. As a Base line for a breakfast it's fantastic but the components just need a tweaking.

The Scottish version has it for me. Lorne sausage, steak and pork links and a tattie scone hmmmmm

Dunno about Welsh as it's not something I have ever seen a take on.

[Anonymous No.6977091]

>>6977066
So you've never been with friends and noticed a string hanging off your clothes?
Cutting it is better than pulling it, obviously.
Why should the police give a shit that you are carrying a pocket knife for that or any reason?

Because they don't have guns. That makes the officers fearful of the citizens, because they can't carry knives but the citizens can. There's a designated "taser officer" that is the only one who could possibly subdue a crazed and violent criminal wielding a kitchen knife. Well what if your taser officer isn't there? You stand around and wait for him.

>>6977082
What?
I said a knife could easily penetrate those lungs (a major organ). That means that your healthcare system would also "have to repair them".
.

[Anonymous No.6977103]

>>6977083

Well, you can't travel to Britain for free healthcare can you retard?

It's fucking free mate, how does that suck?

>>6977091
Even if that was true, a knife of longer length could penetrate them easier.

"YOU COULD KILL SOMEONE WITH A GRENADE EASILY, WE SHOULD BE ALLOWED NUKES!"

[Anonymous No.6977109]

>>6977091

Whatever m8, at least it works.

[Anonymous No.6977113]

>>6976963
Having spoken to more than one police officer regarding knife laws this is correct. I always have a knife of one for or another on me. Nothing big or fancy. A wee opinel or pen knife. If you are polite and not a dick then you are not going to be bothered by a cop. The exception to this rule is if you have a drink in you. If you are drunk they are taking the knife, if even slightly a dick you are getting charged. This is from Glasgow where knife laws are harsh due to the amount of stabbings.

[Anonymous No.6977115]

>>6977103
You can't just buy a grenade friend. You can clearly buy a knife longer than legally allowed though.

And to your other point, if I gave you this and said "here it's free take all you want"
It could still suck, right?

[Anonymous No.6977119]

>>6977109
Show me assaults.

[Anonymous No.6977120]

>>6977115

You missed the point so bad.

You're also committing strawman fallacy so I'm going to take this as you admitting defeat

[Anonymous No.6977143]

>>6977109
UK's rate is too low and USA's is too high for the year listed. Plus homicides in the UK are determined by conviction, not circumstance, and are counted for the year in which the conviction is reached. Plus it's retarded to compare the USA to any single European country considering the vast size and population differences.

[Anonymous No.6977148]

>>6977090
There is a traditional Welsh breakfast of Laverbread . . .it's made from fucking seaweed, I have never eaten it but I must give it a go sometime.

>>6977091
The law is the law but if you are polite and respectful you don't get any trouble, infact you would never normally be stopped anyway, this guy says it too >>6977113
You might be allowed to have guns in the USA but if you are shouting, swearing and acting like a tit, waving your gun around . . .expect to get swatted!

[Anonymous No.6977150]

>>6977143

UK population is 60 million, USA is 300 million. So five times.

Yet the homicide rate of the US is more than twenty-five times the UK rate

checkmate atheists

[Anonymous No.6977163]

>>6977148
Yelling and swearing with a gun are not crimes, brandishing, however is a crime. I'd imagine it's also a crime in britburg.

>>6977120
The post that I was replying to was in and of itself a fallacy. Slippery slope.
>kissing leads to rape
>cheeseburgers lead to obseity
>guns lead to explosives
>explosives lead to larger explosives
TLDR: u started it.

[Anonymous No.6977166]

>>6977143
>Plus it's retarded to compare the USA to any single European country considering the vast size and population differences.
It's not too awful a comparison if you use the rate instead of the absolute count. It's cromulent to compare individual US states to the overall national average. You wouldn't ask the OECD for that sort of data though; they don't care about how the US organizes itself internally.

[Anonymous No.6977184]

>>6977163
You miss my point. If you are acting like a wanker then it will draw attention to yourself and you are more likely to have the knife confiscated or be charged. If you are a decent chap and a cop happens to notice your knife, you may be asked to put it somewhere safer.

Cops in Britain are pretty cool on the whole, unless you piss them off.

[Anonymous No.6977194]

>>6976565
what the fuck is a tendie?

[Anonymous No.6977196]

>>6977163

I did use a fallacy but it wasn't even slippery slope you idiot.

[Anonymous No.6977204]

>>6977184
No that's exactly the point. Brandishing laws are pretty strict, but they exist to allow citizens the right to carry, but not threaten others.

[Anonymous No.6977209]

>>6977150
The USA has a homicide rate of slightly less than 4 times that of the UK. Also if the UK counted murders the same way the US counted murders its rate would go up.

[Anonymous No.6977212]

>>6976996

I was in America the other week and there were signs prohibiting swimming in the sea because it wasn't 'swimming season'. You guys are even bigger pussies.

[Anonymous No.6977220]

>>6977212
>I like to swim where I get eaten by sharks

Where though?

[Anonymous No.6977232]

>>6977143

It's homicide rate, you fucktard. It's adjusted for population size.

[Anonymous No.6977247]

>>6977204
You are over complicating things.

There is a law and that's that! . . . .but Cops take a common-sense view of the circumstances and the sort of person involved, I can't spell it out more clearly!

[Anonymous No.6977276]

>>6976299
>everything store bought instead of home made
why are you on /ck/ bruh?

[Anonymous No.6977320]

>>6976633
>You have an Irish stew . . .just be content with that.
actually most things being called "irish stew" are incredibly inauthentic and do not reflect the traditions of that proud land. Someone will call boiled corned beef with carrots and potatoes "Irish Stew" which is just an insult to myself as a gourmand and to the people of Ireland.

[Anonymous No.6979196]

Please.

[Anonymous No.6979206]

>>6977320
>traditions
>proud land
>gourmand

[Anonymous No.6979212]

>>6976299
fuck.

[Anonymous No.6979246]

>>6976299
>None of nanas mini triangle sandwhiches
>lack of sweet stuff
>cans of drink instead of bottles
>no plates so you can stack yours up instead of climbing over the table constantly
>fucking rice the fuck nigger
>only one bag of crisps and the others are in a fucking plastic container
>no cake
>cheese not pre-cut
>no balloons in sight
>probably no left-overs to snack on for the next week
Fuck your friend and his shitty birthday party, my parents had that shit locked down. and Yeah i'd do that shit again for my 23rd. Random shit from tesco's is best birthday meal

[Anonymous No.6979351]

>>6976546
>>6976570

[Anonymous No.6979515]

>Brown food in the top
Real subtle /int/.