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2023-11: Warosu is now out of extended maintenance.

/ck/ - Food & Cooking

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File: 306 KB, 1353x917, lambkidneylabeled.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
6102812 No.6102812[DELETED]  [Reply] [Original]

I need help think I have kidney trouble.
My back is really tight +painfull my balls have swollen to baseball size appreciate any tips.

>> No.6102816

post gigantic ballz for science

>> No.6102817

don't seek medical advice on the internet

>> No.6102819
File: 1.99 MB, 320x362, 1392965007186.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
6102819

pineapple and cranberries

but nigga, go to the doctor before you get kidney fauilure

>> No.6102820

>>6102812
See a doctor, moron

>> No.6102821

Water.

But your balls are not related to your kidneys, you probably should see a doctor about them, or cut them off.

>> No.6102822

>>6102812
swollen balls might be infection
get strong antibiotics and do it soon.

>> No.6102835

>>6102822
dont get antibiotics just because you think it might help. this kind of thinking is why antibiotic-resistant bacterias will wipe out most of us in the future.

only use it if you know it's needed.

>> No.6102837

>>6102835
sorry, where i live you can get antibiotics only when you visit a doc
so ye, it was implied that it was verified

>> No.6102838
File: 111 KB, 356x337, Grapefruit.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
6102838

I cant walk back killing me balls are now grapefruit size.I have icepacks on them.

>> No.6102842

Finish a bottle of tequila, billy.
That should help a lot.

>> No.6102844

>>6102838

place a grapefruit next to the right one for scale and post

>> No.6102847

>>6102817
>don't seek medical advice on the internet


I don't know why everyone always says this

I got great advice here a few years ago when I had a broken tooth.

>> No.6102848

>>6102847
because dumb people cant distinguish between a joke and advice

>> No.6102850

>>6102812
Ask /fit/

>> No.6102869

>>6102848
A broken tooth isn't the same as balls swollen to baseball size. Provided OP isn't a troll, he's a goddamn moron for not seeing a doc like yesterday.

>> No.6102872
File: 10 KB, 250x323, 547f94bc4d24a.image.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
6102872

Show pic of aching kidney

>> No.6102873

>>6102869

how do you know that there aren't medical professionals on here right now assisting him more quickly, effectively and economically then traveling to a dedicated health facility...fggt?

>> No.6102874
File: 35 KB, 300x426, Testicles-1 (1).jpg~320.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
6102874

I being honest back really tight kidneys hurt balls still swelling up will water help.

>> No.6102875

>>6102874

no water will increase the swelling, you need to keep pleasure on the testicles...do you have any rubber bands?

>> No.6102877

>>6102874
My eyes are getting weary
My back is getting tight
I'm sitting here in traffic on the Queensborough bridge tonight
But, I don't care 'cause all I want to do...
is cash my check and drive right home to you
'cause Baby, all my life
I will be driving home to you

>> No.6102879
File: 73 KB, 350x379, 6a00d8354c5ff669e20163028b6166970d.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
6102879

>>6102874
You need to wring out each testicle like a wet sponge.
Its gonna hurt like hell but if you dont do it they might besplode.
I am not a doctor.
Talk to your doctor before wringing anything.

>> No.6102881

>>6102874
call ambulancia you moron.

>> No.6102902

>>6102874
Yes, be sure to drink at least 4 gallons in under an hour, bbq king.

>> No.6102908
File: 14 KB, 320x256, motivator4790377.jpg~320.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
6102908

>>6102875
Yes but there now size of melons :(

>> No.6102919

>>6102812

As a medical professional, I know that it is very common to have testicular swelling as a side effect of acute kidney failure. Unfortunately, there really is no home remedy to deal with such a serious medical condition, you will most likely need to get hooked up to a dialysis machine on a regular basis pending the inevitable kidney transplant. However, I don't usually recommend patients taking matters into their own hands but in pinch several of my clients have has some success with swallowing mentos whole. It appears that the gum arabic and gelatine contained within the mentos has a relieving effect when combined with caffeine, potassium benzoate and aspartame (commonly found in diet coke). This combination therapy is used by most holistic and eastern medical practitioners although it's result by anecdotal evidence are far lower than that of industrial western medicine.

>> No.6102939
File: 61 KB, 634x422, article-2394587-1B4F97B7000005DC-524_634x422.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
6102939

Mentos? thank you sir least somebody cares.
There size of beech balls now +getting kinda puffy.

>> No.6102946

>>6102939
Guys help now their the size of the hamplanet's udders. I don't understand why noone will help me. Why is their some much hate being xmas time.

>> No.6102952

>>6102946

x-mas is over bitch and no wonder you have kidney failure and swollen balls with your shitty fast food diet and countless hours of trike ridding.

>> No.6102957
File: 402 KB, 1536x1020, o-WESLEY-WARREN-JR-10-STONE-TESTICLES-facebook.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
6102957

Im going to hospital as suggested (if I can make it there)

>> No.6102965
File: 97 KB, 500x713, image.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
6102965

>>6102812
You'll be ok, Buster.

>> No.6102980
File: 5 KB, 150x150, 11215999,height=150,width=150,emoticon-sick-face.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
6102980

I hope so the ladys seem to admire them but can hardly pack them around any more.

>> No.6103031

>>6102874
ITT: American health care system is so poor 4chan is considered a good source of medical information

>> No.6103034

>>6102873

How would you distinguish medical professionals from assholes on an anonymous image board?

>> No.6103038

>>6103031

sadly true

>> No.6103039

>>6103034
by using common sense

>inb4 im too retarded to identify a ruse

>> No.6103044

>>6103039

If the diagnosis was common sense you wouldn't need a doctor in the first place.

>> No.6103046
File: 24 KB, 320x353, ahhhh.jpg~320.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
6103046

>>6103031
Sad but true this place is my only source

>> No.6103048

>>6102812

See a doctor and you'll probably have to change your diet to have less protein, less phosphorus, less sodim, less potassium, etc

>> No.6103051

>>6103044
nvm you have reading disabilities
your question was
>How would you distinguish medical professionals from assholes
the answer is
>by using common sense

go back to facebook. #nohate

>> No.6103060

>>6103051

You're missing the point, yes it's obvious when someone tells you something completely retarded. However unless if you already know what you're talking about there's no way of knowing what is an actual diagnosis and what is something somebody just pulled off google with your symptoms.

>> No.6103066
File: 19 KB, 320x243, testicles-1.jpg~320.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
6103066

I would never take advice from anybody here on anything.

>> No.6103070

>>6103066
Recipes here are actually okay, I tried a few times

>> No.6103073

>>6103060

Here let me help, I have no doubt by your post here that you are suffering from a severe case of autism. Now that you have your diagnosis based on the symptoms provided, I regret to inform you that there is no cure.

see, common sense.

>> No.6103079

>>6103060
You are feeding an obvious troll.

>> No.6103081

>>6103073

lucky guess

>> No.6103121

>>6103079
have you been fed obvious dick?

>> No.6103208

>>6103121
How original. Next time you're gonna call me an autist, huh?

>> No.6103222

Cranberries.

Also, go and see a fucking doctor.

>> No.6103226
File: 160 KB, 500x435, 4e2086e3-b4e6-4548-9d56-ad6aa7aa667c1.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
6103226

>>6103208
Methinks thou dost protest too much.

>> No.6103228

>>6102812
>my balls have swollen to baseball size
Cancer. No other symptom is more worrisome than this one.
Get to a doctor ASAP.

>> No.6103301
File: 476 KB, 256x180, tumblr_lmt6xif7711qafrh6.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
6103301

Thanks 4 your concern

>> No.6103309

>>6102957
holy shit, that's hilarious.

>> No.6103311

I want to lick that kidney

>> No.6103368

>>6103301
So you lied about having swollen testicles to get attention. You must have a pathetic lonely life.

>> No.6103511
File: 10 KB, 300x231, thBIQY1D6Y.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
6103511

On my way 2 doc now.

>> No.6103620
File: 39 KB, 640x480, eagle_mourning_web.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
6103620

>>6103031
I want to argue, but I can't.

>> No.6103627

>>6103031
That's why you become good friends with someone that is in the medical field. They can usually give you good advice. I had a nursing friend offer to set me up with a morphine drip at home when I slipped a disc.

>> No.6103636

>>6103228

testicular torsion, maybe? idk

>> No.6103993
File: 143 KB, 480x360, Southpark-Big-Balls.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
6103993

I can hardly drag them around

>> No.6104016

>possibly severe kidney and testicular pain

>better ask the cooking board on 4chan what they think can help!

Go to a doctor

>> No.6104017

>>6102877
King of Queens.


Seriously though, assuming you're from the U.S., try Medicaid to see if you're eligible

>> No.6104051
File: 60 KB, 640x360, 130819134056-tlc-enlarged-scrotum-story-top.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
6104051

>>6104016
im trying for Christ sakes cant drive or even get in car there getting bigger by the second.
just got ride to get help couldn't get in hospital im going to vet better than nothing I guess.

>> No.6104089

>>6103031
Not even, it's just that this guy is too dense to call 911

>> No.6104098
File: 70 KB, 640x540, testicle-kick1.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
6104098

IM SEEKING MEDICAL ATTENTION NOW.

>> No.6104113

>>6102812
Because 4chan is known as such a compassionate place <end sarcasm> I went to web MD for you and typed in your symptoms. They suggested you might have a hernia. I'd suggest dialing 911 and request EMS. If your so damn poor you might qualify for medicaid. If not most hospitals will be happy to set you up with a payment plan. Seriously, stop complaining to us and get to an ER before this gets any worse.

>> No.6104116

>>6103368
You're right look at all the pictures he has. Like he saved them first and then planned out all of his posts.
No friends Gaybert?
Chili's closed today?
What did you do before you found 4chan?
Moot should charge you $10 a month.
You'll pay it because you're obsessed with this site.

>> No.6104119

>>6104098

goddammit, bbq. I really hate to think that I'm as pathetic as you to be here now, doing this. fuck you and my life.

>> No.6104123

>>6104089

uninsured american here.

i think i'd rather just die than accumulate the whopping ambulance and ER bills.

right now i'm pretty sure i'm suffering from diabetes insipidus and testicular varicocele.

i refuse to go to the doctor cause i can't handle $20,000 in debt.

maybe i'll go down to the free homeless clinic if things get drastically worse.

>> No.6104124

>>6102919
If it is kidney failure, look at the bright side. You will automatically qualify for SSDI and medicare in the US. Dialysis is a pain though.

>> No.6104125

>>6104051
A hoddie... Fucking genius I tell ya.

>> No.6104129

>>6104116
And you aren't? Hell I get on here and see a lot of crap but I don't complain and why should you or anyone as far as that goes!!! We don't like it then don't reply is the wat I see it!!!!!!

>> No.6104132

>>6104124

>guaranteed to die

Ya'll government cheese eatin mother fuckers think free minimum wage is the bright side?

>> No.6104137

>>6104113
MY LAST WEEKS PAY WAS $1,140 GUESS THATS KINDA POOR.

>> No.6104143

>>6104129+1
NO SHIT GO BABBLE YOUR BULLSHIT ELSEWERE LIKE ME OR ANYBODY ELSE GOING WASTE TIME AND REPLY 2 THE PIECE OF SHIT FREKIN PATHETIC LOSER

>> No.6104146

>>6104123
15 year diabetes sufferer here. You do understand that if you have untreated diabetes you will have a stroke and possibly go blind at some point? People who die from strokes are often the lucky ones. I've met people younger than me who are in nursing homes because they ignored their worsening diabetes. Unless you're trolling us, get to a damn ER. They want to get paid for treating you, they will help you find a way to pay them. They can even help you find insurance plans you can afford.Sheesh, worst case of white mans syndrome I've seen in a while.

>> No.6104150
File: 349 KB, 1000x650, Wesley-Warren--The-man-with-10-stone-testicles.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
6104150

THERE FIXING MY BALLS

>> No.6104155

>>6104146
THANKS 4 THE ADVICE +HOPE YOU HAVE GREAT NEWYEARS

>> No.6104158

>>6104146

it's not regular ol' diabetes.

>Although they have a common name, diabetes mellitus and diabetes insipidus are two entirely separate conditions with unrelated mechanisms.

i don't believe i'm drinking gallons of water a day and pissing every half hour 'cause i have high blood sugar. i'm convinced the polyuria is from something else.

but yeah, i know how incredibly foolish i am. i'm fully expecting a world of hurt if i let this go.

it's the fuckin anxiety that makes me want to avoid treatment. overcoming the fear is tough.

>> No.6104167

>>6104137
Bullshit. I only make about $800 before taxes a week and I have insurance.
>>6104132
Millions of Obama voters do.

In all seriousness, if you'd rather die than pay medical bills, there are much quicker and less painful ways than ignoring diabetes.

>> No.6104177
File: 178 KB, 1680x946, Planet_Terror_0653.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
6104177

THEY SEEM B HELPING ME BUT IM NOT SHURE ABOUT THIS DOC

>> No.6104185

>>6104167
I HAVE INSURANCE TO CAN I ASK YOU A SERIOUS QUESTION ?
R U RETARDED OR SOMETHING ?

>> No.6104187
File: 63 KB, 548x700, planet-terror-matthew-carroll.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
6104187

I DONT KNOW ABOUT THIS NURSE ETHER

>> No.6104198

>>6104158
Ah okay, the version that you think you have is pretty uncommon. I read the same article you got the green text from and you probably just need lab work to confirm the diagnosis and then the right medications. They probably have generics that will be pretty cheap. The anxiety is another matter.

>> No.6104201

>>6104137
If that's poor then I want to be poor also.

>> No.6104202

>>6104185
No, I'm just not scared of going to the doctor. The Obama crack was meant in jest.

>> No.6104206

>>6102939
Is that a hoodie?

>> No.6104237
File: 427 KB, 640x300, PlanetTerror.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
6104237

IM BETTER THE NURSE JUICED MY BALLS THERE LIKE DOWN TO WALNUT SIZE NOW !!!!!

>> No.6104437 [DELETED] 

>>6102874
Go to the emergency room. Do it NOW (if you haven't already) if you want to keep your balls.

>> No.6104479

>>6102879
>besplode

>> No.6104509
File: 1.96 MB, 276x270, mentos coke.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
6104509

>>6102919

swallowing mentos whole
(diet coke)
>>6102848
>>6102939