/ck/ - Food & Cooking

[Anonymous No.5476081]

I'm getting drunk tonight and feel like cooking. I'm going to post my fridge and you can order me what to do with it. Assume basic dry goods are present, but nothing fancy like a jar of palm hearts, or shit. Will post the process. Last time it was some bastard version of eggs benedict.

This is your easel, these are your paints, I am your brush. Should be fun.

[Anonymous No.5476084]

>>5476081
pork chops with chocolate sauce

[Anonymous No.5476086]

>>5476081
got any produce?

either way make some pork fried rice you pleb

[Anonymous No.5476089]

>>5476081
Boiled milk chop with a side of strawberry jelly

[Anonymous No.5476090]

>>5476086
That's a lot of pork for a little rice.

[Anonymous No.5476093]

Just eat the jar of strawberry jam with a spoon

[Anonymous No.5476095]

boil finely minced pork chop in garlic and sriracha with some basalmic in there

serve over rice

[Anonymous No.5476108]

>>5476081
Katsudon.

[Anonymous No.5476112]

>>5476095
Okay, might do that.

Although >>5476089 is tempting.

[Anonymous No.5476113]

>>5476081
>shoprite milk
mah nigga from nj/ny

[ETHANOL No.5476115]

Got a grill OP? I'd season and grill the chops, coat with bbq sauce and cook a little longer then eat a couple of those. Save the rest and make bbq pork fried rice tomorrow.

[Anonymous No.5476116]

>>5476108
Gesundheit

[ETHANOL No.5476120]

Also.

>that big unlabled disgusting takeout box propped up hidden at the bottom.

What is?

[Anonymous No.5476132]

>>5476120
I'm a fan of BBQ anything. I'd just grill/roast/braise the chops and smother them with the BBQ. Maybe make sandwiches with your rye bread.

[Anonymous No.5476133]

>>5476120
Left over cajun chicken sandwich box. The trash is full and I have to go to a friend's house to burn it so I am keeping it in there to throw in a municipal trash can when I go out.

>>5476115
No grilling unless I do it on the sidewalk. But I can do that shit in a single pan.

>>5476113
PA too, nigga.

[Anonymous No.5476140]

>>5476081
Woah, woah, woah. Wait a dick smoking second.
What can I save $3 on?

[ETHANOL No.5476150]

>>5476133
>5476133
Fair enough. Then I'd probably pan cook the chops and make a sandwich with the toast and maybe that swiss cheese if thats your thing. Add whatever condiments you like. I'd finish the rest in bbq sauce, chop, store and make the pork fried rice tomm.

[Anonymous No.5476155]

>>5476140
looks like baking soda

[Anonymous No.5476158]

>>5476140
I can check. one sec.

...Detergent
"*with purchase of both products via mail-in rebate. Offer expires 12/31/2010/ See back panel for details."

What a rip-off. A stamp would eat like a sixth of your savings.

[Anonymous No.5476169]

>>5476158
Thanks. You have won me over with your will to photograph anything.

I offer the following recipe:
BASTARDISED SWEET AND SOUR/SWEET CHILLI PORK.

Step 1: Dice (or strip) dem pork chops.
Step 2: Acquire tinned tomatoes, sugar and vinegar.
Step 3: Equal amounts of sugar to vinegar, boil until sugar dissolves, add tomatoes and any chilli available.
Yes, even if it's sauce.
Step 3: Reduce down until sticky.
Step 4: Cook off pork strips, add sauce, add whatever the fuck else you want.
Step 5: Cook off that takeout rice.

Plate, serve.

[Anonymous No.5476172]

>>5476158
Not to mention the cost of a time machine you'd need to build to claim the offer.

What's the shelf life of baking soda anyway?

[Anonymous No.5476177]

Fuck it. I'll be back tomorrow to post. More ideas welcomed, and how the .. It's too late to dirty all these pans.

I figure, I bread and pan fry half with melted swiss like dude said, fry up the rice in the left over oil ...don't know about adding an egg into that, but there is some goya seasoning that might work well with it. Do eggs go bad? I swear I had em at least that old before but these aren't sterilized irradiated grocery egg shits.

Other pork... Not sure. BBQ sounds... meh. We'll see. Now to finish my drunk.

[Anonymous No.5476181]

>>5476172
Fucking thing says 30 days. I call bullshit on that. I use it to clean up vomit odor from the cat all the time and it still works. Those arm&hammer fucks are goddamn con artists

>>5476169
WOAH NIGGA. To be considered, I can't drive and the stores is closed so ...under advisement. I will return.

[Anonymous No.5476196]

>>5476133
You in montgomery county, OP?

[Anonymous No.5476226]

>>5476081
Take your bread out of your fridge and keep it there.

[Anonymous No.5476235]

>>5476196
I ain't in some philly suburb, kid. The hard times should tell you scranton or allentown.

Also, I been thinking on it. Calling off tomorrow and making my meal. A three piece. Breaded cheese chops on the roll I forgot to label with mayo and hot sauce, side of pork fried rice, and bbq strip pork. I'm inspired now. Start in whatever many hours. I knew I came back to /ck/ for a reason and I'm not even solid drunk yet.

[Anonymous No.5476533]

I'm not sleeping yet. Good time to brine the pork. Gonna be better than fucking egg salad that's for damn sure. Now we wait.

[Anonymous No.5476534]

>>5476533
What in the fuck are you doing? It's been at lest two hours, why aren't you eating you shitfaced tallywhacker?

[Anonymous No.5476536]

>>5476533
Just curious, what's the barrel length and caliber of that revolver? Also, what ammo do you use?

[Anonymous No.5476550]

>>5476536
looks like a S&W 686 .357 in 3.XX (whatever 3+" they make). Or a ruger gp100... I'm not too good with my wheel gun recognition so take that as it may...

[Anonymous No.5476567]

>>5476550
>>5476536
What? That's South America's finest. Taurus 6" barrel on a .357/.38 8 rou-YES 8 round chamber. Rail sights, etc. S&W can suck my overpriced dick.

>>5476534
I told you, drinking. No appetite. No cook. Just prep.

[Anonymous No.5476574]

>>5476567
Oh Jesus... He brought his brazil-monkey range toy out

[Anonymous No.5476589]

>>5476574
Goddamn right I did. Who knows what might happen at any moment?

And as a plinker, that shit is fun as hell.

Thinking about draining the brine before the pork gets all salty and soupy in a few hours. It's not even 2, so ...shit.

[Anonymous No.5476612]

>>5476589
sacrifice a chop, make a stock. just add mirepoix, garlic, and seasoning

[Anonymous No.5476620]

>>5476612
>A pinch of pork soup for a pound of effort

I don't think so, Tim.

[Anonymous No.5476627]

>>5476620
I guess if you call passing out with the stove on low a pound of effort...

[Anonymous No.5476637]

>>5476627
That's a good way to catch the cat on fire. No thanks. Also, there is something about slow cooking a single chop that seems so...

Trifling. Like... damn man. Depressing. Not judging, lord knows I been in a bad way but... shit man. At least get the whole loin and ketchup roast it in a crock pot.

[Anonymous No.5476647]

>>5476637
Wouldn't be as substantial as a butt-bone, but would probably have the same amount of meat after trimming...

[Anonymous No.5476707]

>>5476574

Taurus makes a fine enough revolver. What, you want to buy an overpriced Smith and Wesson, pay 300 more dollars for one just so you can say 'Murica?

[Anonymous No.5476737]

>>5476707
Indeed.

OP here still. Hey, you guys ever suffer from sleep paralysis?? This happened a week ago. Afterwards started seeing this topic a lot more and more. Weird that, eh? Gotta be a term for that sort of coincidence.

Imagine trying to wake from what your half dead mind was telling you was reality. This horrible sense of dread of 3rd party observation was the worst. It plays on your most vulnerable and entrenched subconscious fears. I'm not too religious, so it was stupid fucking aliens. But Not in any form or psychical construct, just the mental idea of it.... Which made it that much worse. If you can put a face on your enemy, you can understand him. This was literally the unknown keeping me in paralysis. I woke a little bit enough to know, "Jesus not again!" and the thoughts of doubt crept in.

Imagine losing all sense of scale and perception and falling at once. In the meantime there are negative forces watching and studying you. You have the faintest glimpse of what is going on and you cant move. I tried to scream but it seemed I had no mouth. This seemed to go on for eternity. I eventually rocked my body side to side building momentum enough to be able to moan and howl. Nothing though, and after slim progress I was back.
Like falling but seeing the world rise up in front of you. Like being able to not only see the moon smashing the earth, but to feel the absolute terror such a sight would imbue on a man. The sensation of total helplessness at the hand of a negative and powerful entity that singled you out for judgement. The more powerful your imagination, the worse it seems. The shit that drives you to drink. The shit that makes you pray to a just god you know can't exist.

Anyways, pork dinner tomorrow. See you then, and good night.

[Anonymous No.5477609]

Okay, I promised some shit. Here we go.

I have to warn, my internet is for shit, so be patient.

[Anonymous No.5477613]

>>5477609
Got that breaded shit frying, got that bbq strip cooking, got that lame pork cubed and ready.

[Anonymous No.5477619]

>>5477613
Who ever heard of a pork chop pack making three dishes? Shit's outrageous.

[Anonymous No.5477623]

>>5476737

You need to lay off the drugs, bro.

[Anonymous No.5477627]

The chops came out nice and crispy, but the bbq looks watery as hell. We'll see how good that reductions shit works. Started the rice and pork.

[Anonymous No.5477664]

>>5477623
I stopped using drugs years ago. ANyways, some eggs.

[Anonymous No.5477672]

Shit is looking damn good. Not bad for the nothing in the fridge you saw earlier, right?

[Anonymous No.5477708]

And there it is. Total cost about 3 dollars.

[Anonymous No.5477718]

So that's it. How'd I do? Ya'll mother fuckers inspired me here, so dudes upthread should take the blame or the love. Still, I'm full as hell. Would you eat this shit?

[Anonymous No.5477757]

>ShopRite

[Anonymous No.5477778]

>>5477718
I'd eat it

[Anonymous No.5477788]

>>5477778
Thanks bro. It was awesome. I'm so proud of myself and the people that populate this board. So many good ideas. You all deserve a round of applause.

[Anonymous No.5477811]

>>5476196
I am.

[Anonymous No.5478895]

>>5477718
Looks good, especially the pork and rice (but I'm a sucker for rice.)

[Anonymous No.5478933]

>>5476533
i recognize those fat fingers. Aren't you the Seagram's swilling dude? you make some tasty looking dishes from time to time. I am monitoring this thread.

[Anonymous No.5478961]

>>5477788
I like you guy. We need more people like you instead of constant fast food shit threads.

[Anonymous No.5478993]

>>5476737
>http://www.erowid.org/: The Post


>>5477609
here's Tom with the weather.

[Anonymous No.5479171]

>>5478961
qfmft

>>5476737
yeah, by far the most terrifying experience of my life. a portal opened up in the wall infront of my bed that was slowly sucking my bed in and all I could see was dark silhouettes being tortured, raped and mutilated whilst this demonic figure was laughing at it all, beckoning me in. I couldn't scream, couldn't move, I told myself it was the end, heck I even started praying in my head and I'm nota believer in any way. I managed to regain control by doing what you said, rocking my body side to side cause I couldnt move a single muscle. Then I got up and everything disappeared and was fucking terrified for the next few days till I went to see my psych and he told me what it was and not to worry about it. Have had it a few times since then and it hasn't been as bad now that I know what it is.

Anyway, nice looking cheap feed OP, nice thread