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/ck/ - Food & Cooking

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16831343 No.16831343 [Reply] [Original]

>Bon appétit Anon!

>> No.16831350

>>16831343
This is Alinea, and you will never be able to afford it, or even the clothes you would need to be allowed inside.

>> No.16831367

>>16831350
It's $275 a person Anon.

>> No.16831373

>>16831343
Why does the guy with a camera have a halo?

>> No.16831376

>>16831367
+ anywhere from $100 to $250 to rent a suit for a night because most of these high concept places are jacket only.

>> No.16831377

>>16831367
Yes, it is.

>> No.16831383

>>16831377
Anyone can afford this you ignorant pleb.

>> No.16831389

>>16831383
Hey be nice, he might be European.

>> No.16831476

>>16831350
Nor could they afford plates.

>> No.16832531
File: 120 KB, 960x520, pretending to be jewish, even if youre jewish, isnt allowed on 4chan.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
16832531

>>16831376
fidelio

>> No.16832550

>>16831376
>high concept
more like
>mentally ill liberal white retardation

>> No.16832556

>>16831383
I think you're dramatically overestimating the number of people who can drop 5 or 6 bills on dinner like it ain't no thang.

>> No.16832563

Do you think they actually have some kind of planned layout or do they just show up at the table and start slapping shit around since nobody will question it?

>> No.16832603

>>16831350
>Alinea
Literal flyover """cuisine""""

>> No.16832608

>The best restaurant in the United States
>6th best in the world
My god. Why?

>> No.16832614

>>16831343
It is a work of art! A masterpiece!

>> No.16832626

>>16831376
Lol the fuck is wrong with you where you need to rent clothing? Its a suit, not a limo.

>> No.16832628

Papa John's chicken "poppers" are so bad. They are worse than chicken nuggets. Why did I buy them?

>> No.16832640

>>16832628
And why do they advertise their boneless wings as "raised without antibiotics" while their bone-in wings are not? Why do they only raise bone-in wings with antibiotics?

>> No.16832645

>>16831376
I own a suit, so whatever. I own multiple for different occasions as is traditional. Regardless of that, the guy being recorded recording the dessert is just wearing slacks and a button down. Not a suit.

>> No.16832646

>>16832556
If it was "no thang" they wouldn't be filming it for posterity. These are middle class people, this is the highlight of their trip, it cost more than the hotel they're staying at.

>> No.16832665

>>16832626
Plus you could buy a cheaper suit for like $50 and no one would know the difference

>> No.16832669

>>16832608
Food critics are fundamentally retarded, same reason every other industry critic and the general public have opposite ratings. They're disconnected from reality.

>> No.16832673

We had a thread about the originator of molecular gastronomy here the other day. Blame him. Alinea is just along for the ride. That said, they did make contributions to the overall trend. They would not be the top restaurant in this country if they weren't culinary trailblazers themselves.

>> No.16832683

>>16832556
Might not be nothing, but the median household income in the US is over 60k. So, if they really want to go there it's not some impossible thing to build towards for at least half the US.

>> No.16832688

>>16832665
I went into a fancy club type of place a few months ago. The bouncer almost didn't let me in because there was a bit of schmutz on my expensive shoes. He gave me a warning saying he would not let it slide next time.

>> No.16832696

>>16832669
I think everyone involved in what you might call "high art" is fundamentally disconnected from reality. It applies to all areas of art.

>> No.16832722

>>16831376
I don't see a jacket in that webm

>> No.16832758

>>16832688
no fucking way. I call BS

>> No.16832783

>>16832758
That's totally reasonable, to be honest. I was denied entry to a few places in LA because of the way I was dressed.

>> No.16832821

>pretending to follow any kind of creativity or design when clearly just lazily throwing things around at random
>A guy shows up at the end and just dumps two handfuls of shit all over everything anyways like it's the punchline to the joke
This is pretty funny but I don't know it's $275 funny, surely there's cheaper comedy shows in town

>> No.16832833

>>16832821
Postmodern art is all about irony and essentially one big joke of itself. If it's lowbrow comedy you're after, you can just go to Second City.

>> No.16832841

>>16831343
The only thing that pisses me off is the fucking soy baby taking pictures. Can anyone just enjoy the moment anymore, or does everyone have to post pictures online of everything they're doing, all the fucking time? Imagine spending the kind of cash you would to dine at Alinea, just to watch it all from the lens on your phone. Disgusting.
Also, Alinea is pretty much the only reason to go to Chicago.

>> No.16832846

>>16831343
I want to know if that black shit on the table is the design of the table or is it black sauce shit they smeared on it before the video started? If it's the second thing, then that looks very unappetizing to me

>> No.16832848

>>16832841
Holy shit imagine believing Alinea is better than Harold's chicken shack. Kill yourself soyboy consoomer faggot.

>> No.16832849

>>16832821
>This is pretty funny but I don't know it's $275 funny
that's the joke, and their customers are the punchline

>> No.16832850

>>16831350
nobody goes there anymore

>> No.16832853

>>16832846
eating off a table just feels unsanitary as well
i don't care if it's a three michelin star restaurant

>> No.16832857

>>16832841
Dumbphones truly are the disease of our age. That and covid.

>> No.16832869

>>16832848
>Harold's chicken shack
Hot fucking garbage, and definitely not worth a trip to one of the worst, most hellish cities in America. I mean, it's not Baltimore or Detroit, but fuck Chicago.
Plus I live near at least five chicken joints that blow that tourist trap the fuck out, but I guess it's something fancy for you flyover fucks. Alinea is all you "people" got, that's it, seethe, cope, and dilate.

>> No.16832882
File: 347 KB, 2220x1248, cloudgate.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
16832882

>>16832841
>the only reason to go to Chicago
and for "the bean"

>> No.16832888
File: 36 KB, 400x267, Maxwell Street Polish.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
16832888

>>16832869
Maxwell Street Polish

>> No.16832889 [DELETED] 

>>16832869
Cope white boy faggot. $3.50 half dark special mogs literally everything else out there.
However I agree that there is no reason to actually visit the nigger infested shithole that is Chicago if you don't have to.

>> No.16832899

>>16832888
>Go all the way to Chicago, braving some of the stupidest fucking highways in the whole country and narrowly avoid getting shot, just to eat a sausage
I'm good.

>> No.16832901
File: 237 KB, 1200x900, mary-bartelme-park-west-loop-01.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
16832901

>>16832869
This is a neighborhood called West Loop. It's hella expensive to live here, and it's got top-tier restaurants one on top of the other. A burger place called Au Cheval routinely makes top 10 lists of best burgers in the country.

>> No.16832903

>>16832889
My neighbor fries chicken out in his front yard and sells a ten piece for $5, and even that's a thousand times better than your shit shack.

>> No.16832909

>>16832901
West loop is full of rich yuppie chink faggots, soulless as fuck.
>>16832903
Let me guess, $5 is half a mortgage payment where you're from.

>> No.16832910

>>16832901
Imagine paying out the ass to live in Chicago. Couldn't be me.

>> No.16832911

>>16832853
They put something down on the table you retard.

>> No.16832912
File: 477 KB, 1536x2048, 1630384334383.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
16832912

>> No.16832916

>>16832909
>Muh soul
You live in Chicago, you almost certainly make less money, pay more, and have a lower quality of life than I do. I almost pity you.

>> No.16832923

>>16832899
Don't be such a racist

>> No.16832926
File: 3.06 MB, 1200x1600, timeoutmarket.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
16832926

>>16832899
We also have 'food halls' in the loop the feature small stands with select dishes from great restaurants from all over Chicago. We also have "the taste of Chicago" festival in Grant Park (of Lollapalooza fame) in the summer.
https://thekittchen.com/what-to-do-in-the-west-loop-chicago/

>> No.16832935

>>16832916
Oof big cope, I was a student when I lived in Chicago, hence the love for $3 fried chicken... Have fun fucking your sister for the rest of your life Cletus.

>> No.16832936

>>16832911
If it's a large surface that is not a dish, that's the same as eating off the table. They can put something down on the floor that's floor-sized. I still call that eating off the floor.

>> No.16832939

>>16832910
You haven't seen what that area looks like.

>> No.16832949

>>16832936
You're a retard, then.

>> No.16832950

>>16832912

Miami is just a city where insecure people with too much money blow all their shit trying to look rich. It's a shitstain city. All that food was probably cooked worse than what you'd get a below-average Red Lobster.

>> No.16832978

>>16832950
It's salt bae's restaurant, so probably not. But it's absolutely a place to separate the rich from their money.

>> No.16832984

>>16832950
True. It's insane how such a rich and expensive city can have no industry whatsoever. Really makes you think.

>> No.16832989

>>16832984
tourism is literally an industry you fucking idiot.

is /ck/ the dumbest board? I'm starting to think that it might be.

>> No.16833002

>>16832984
Because it's primarily an Ocean-side hangout for celebrities and the ultra-rich. You can probably catch Klaus Schwab at Art Basel Miami.

>> No.16833005

>>16832989
tourism is an industry the way sociology is a science lmoa

>> No.16833010

>>16832989
I know what he means, though. Miami is not a real city where people from all walks of life can make a good living. It's a facade and little more.

>> No.16833015

>>16832989
Kek you fucking retard. I'm from Florida you dumb cunt Miami is completely propped up by drug money. Just kill yourself you midwit.

>> No.16833026

>>16833015
>I'm from Florida
Stopped reading there. Literally the dumbest people from the dumbest state. You're also some panhandle wigger, so your opinion doubly doesn't count.

>> No.16833033

>>16833015
Is this why the infrastructure and buildings keep collapsing over there? Bridges, condos, you name it. You may be rich, but this won't save you from concrete falling on your head and killing you dead.

>> No.16833039

>>16833026
That post was probably made by Matt Gaetz himself.

>> No.16833278 [DELETED] 
File: 33 KB, 474x574, smg.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
16833278

>>16831350
>prominently featured faggot recording in ill-fitting button-down
>"y-you'll never be able to afford these clothes!!"
you have zero class and it shows very clearly in your desperate attempt at gatekeeping.

>> No.16833286

>>16833026
>>16833033
i dunno i live in san francisco now.

>> No.16833291

>>16833026
btw I'm from wellington, fl. not sure if that matters.

>> No.16833305

>>16833278
*tips my trillby*

>> No.16833357

>>16831343
There's a fucking webm containment thread. Fuck off.

>> No.16833511

>>16831343
Obviously a restaurant for people with more money than brains.

>> No.16833609

>>16832926
totally soulless

>> No.16833915

>>16831343
I... what the fuck are they even making? The hell is that supposed to be?

>> No.16834142

>>16833357
Thanks for bumping the thread newfriend.

>> No.16834166

>>16831376
How fucking poor are you that you don't own at least one nice outfit?

>> No.16834191

>>16832849
You know how after the punchline sometimes comedians will make another joke on the same topic (almost like a second punchline) but because you are already laughing it's even funnier?

The second punchline is after you leave the restaurant in downtown Chicago wearing your uncomfortable suit you get assaulted by a gang of wild joggers XD priceless.

>> No.16834805

what is a deadass snowcap?

>> No.16834808

>>16833609
That’s just a food hall. The restaurants don’t look like this. They are small and cozy.

>> No.16834810

>>16833915
Dessert

>> No.16834811

>>16831343
if american psycho was set in the current day, this is the kind of stuff they would order

>> No.16834815

>>16834811
Well, yeah probably

>> No.16834816

>>16834166
Suits are for jackasses, no matter the cost.

>> No.16834818

>>16831343
do you suppose to lick the table?

>> No.16834819
File: 1.94 MB, 432x768, toilet bowl food.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
16834819

sorry but this is how real gentlemen dine

>> No.16834836

>>16833915
Exactly what I came to ask

>> No.16834837

>>16831376
>rent a suit
Buy a cheap one from Walmart and I guarantee they can't tell the difference.

>> No.16834845

>>16831343
I fucking hate this conspicuous consumption nonsense. You don't go to that resturant for a nice meal, you go there so you can take pictures of the affront to the culinary arts that they make. You go there so you can show off to your fellow rich cunts and pretend that you're 18th century aristocrats.
It makes my blood boil

>> No.16834846

>>16831343
If all it takes to be paid this much money is to cook decent food and fucking throw it on a table like a caveman I'm quitting my job. Fuck this gay Earth.

>> No.16834853

>>16834818
It’s finger lickin’ good.

>> No.16834856

>>16834805
lol PLEASE tell me this is a joke. is that on the menu?

>> No.16834857

I wonder what will come after molecular gastronomy. This has been going on for a while already. Its the roaring 20s. Perhaps its time for something new?

>> No.16834867

>>16834805
>>16834856
That would actually be kinda funny

>> No.16834880

>>16834857
Culinary minimalism. A single carrot, boiled without seasoning. 3,000 dollars a plate.

>> No.16834891

>>16832939
ahahaha yeah, that'll keep me in fucking 'cago.

>> No.16834898

>>16832926
Literally looks like a prison cafeteria.

>> No.16834902

>>16832688
>things that didn't happen

>> No.16834903

>>16834898
What crime do I need to commit to get sent to a prison like that?

>> No.16834905

>>16834819
Why are Indians obsessed with shitting? Is it a culture thing?

>> No.16834910

>>16834903
Embezzlement, watching tv without a liocense, pirating movies, etc.

>> No.16834912

>>16831350
>grey button up
>you couldnt even afford the clothes
lol faggot

>> No.16835010

>>16831343
>>16113681
pretentious shit
as if I'm going to just sit there like a retard as these "cooks" throw and drizzle various ingredients onto my table in turns, each simultaneously spilling some onto my clothes, lap and floor. every turn furthering the insult
>we get this idiot to pay for this "art piece"
they've got you where they want you. each of the "cooks" get to make fun of you in turns, each more half-assed and spilling than the previous, laughing among themselves as you can do nothing but sit there and take it with a smile. you can't stand up and walk away as that would reveal that you're lacking culture; you do not understand and appreciate modern art.

besides, how are you supposed to eat this? with a squeegee?
the table being artsy itself makes it hard to see where there's something to eat or not

>> No.16835012

>>16831350
I don't care

>> No.16835018

>>16832556
It's not about being able to drop 5 or 6 bills like it's nothing, retard. North Africans, Middle Easterns, Afghans and such that are dirt poor can still manage to scrap together thousands of dollars to be smuggled to Europe. It's not a question of being able to afford something or not, it's a question of priorities.

>> No.16835026

>>16835010
Lol good take on this bs.

>> No.16835028

>>16832665
That's like saying you can serve chef boyardee as home made ravioli and no one would know the difference.

>> No.16835297

>>16832665
Ahahaha people can 100% tell.

>> No.16835333

>>16832531
But what is the password for the house?

>> No.16835717

>>16832563
i've gotten 4 times and each one was a spontaneous improvised masterdish.

>> No.16835722

>>16832640
biotics only live in the bones. no bones = no antibiotics

>> No.16835728

>>16835018
??? It's the same thing, fuckwit. Your priorities determine what you can afford.

Almost everyone has $275. Very few people can afford to drop that on a single meal.

>> No.16835729

>>16832833
lowbrow comedy is too racist and sexist for second city anymore. their youtube channel is a travesty.

>> No.16835730

>>16835728
Should’ve studied harder in school.

>> No.16835732

>>16835730
I've been to Alinea.

>> No.16835738

I live a few blocks from a restaurant with a Michelin star. On the same block is a a BBQ place, a burger joint, two Chinese places, and a Chipotle. And thats only one side of the street.

I love not being a flyover.

>> No.16835741

>>16833015
seriously. have none of these people watched cocaine cowboys?

DUDES - hsbc bank was busted in the early 00's for altering their drive through teller windows to accept duffel bags full of cash.
ps - james comey was on the executive board at this time.

>> No.16835742

>>16835738
The only part of that post that disqualifies your state from flyover status is the michelin star.

Do you really think chinese restaurants or fucking CHIPOTLE are special?

>> No.16835743

>>16835738
Are you bragging about living near restaurants? Cuz that's about as low tier as flexes can get broseph

>> No.16835745

>>16835742
>>16835743
t. mad flyover

>> No.16835747
File: 81 KB, 600x536, laugh.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
16835747

>>16835742
>>16835743

Enjoy driving 3 miles to go to Uncle Tom's Extra Dry Pork Shack, mid-westerners.

>> No.16835761

>>16835747
>>16835745
wowowow what a ruse! you sure got us!

You know how I know you're poor? You live near restaurants.

>> No.16835762

>>16835761
Must have struck a nerve. Don’t worry, eat an ear of corn, that always cheers you guys up.

>> No.16835763
File: 10 KB, 248x203, pYRA TEARS.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
16835763

>>16835761
>Midwesterner thinks that just because all of their restaurants are next to the highway off ramp, areas with restaurants must be shitty.

>> No.16835770

>>16831343
Alinea on a Friday night, how'd he swing that?

>> No.16835776

>>16835763
Nah, I just have bought enough houses that I know mixed-use zoning always brings down property values. You think a chipotle is propping up the neighborhood? Lmao

>> No.16835786

>>16835770
He looks asian.

>> No.16835788

>>16831350
Alinea isn't even that expensive...
>>16832673
Are they really top?
>>16832901
Au Cheval is good but not that good. The same owners have Green Street Smoked Meats and Bavettes which are both much better
>>16832869
Harolds is top tier poor food
>>16832882
No offense but there's nothing interesting about the bean

>> No.16835791
File: 474 KB, 570x363, Chipotle.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
16835791

>>16835776
Okay anon. That fast food joint is really depressing these property values

>> No.16835800

I didnt read the thread can someone tell me what theyre actually making and throwing around?

>> No.16835807

>>16835800
Dessert.

>> No.16835813

>>16834819
Criminally underrated.

>> No.16835817

>>16835791
I really hope that's like your childhood bully's house lol

>> No.16835823

>>16835817
Please anon.

My childhood bully died at age 22 after he was shot for getting his boss's 14 year old daughter pregnant

>> No.16835838

>>16835823
I... have no real response to that. Though, that's not doing a lot for your anonymity.

>> No.16835846
File: 97 KB, 540x720, rocklandsbbq.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
16835846

>>16835791
This is the barbecue this nigga's bragging about by the way

>> No.16835849
File: 111 KB, 225x236, Haachama dance.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
16835849

>>16835838
Good luck.
I'm behind seven proxies.

>> No.16835855

>>16835846
And he forgot to mention the Domino's! What convenience! And within walking distance of a Fedex Office Print and Ship Center! Truly, he lives in an exclusive neighborhood.

>> No.16835863

>>16835855
Actually the dominos burnt down is being rebuilt, lol.
There are two other places to get pizza on that block though, so it hardly even matters.

>> No.16835871

>>16835863
It's called a "restaurant row". They're in every city, my guy.

>> No.16835874

>>16835871
True, but to be fair most cities don't have people proud to live near them so that's kinda special lol

>> No.16835876

>>16835871
You have clearly never been to Iowa.

>> No.16835894

>>16831350
I'd rather go to The Inn at Little Washington for some high-concept food my waiter doesn't smash on my table in a performance art piece.

>> No.16835916

>>16835894
Did anyone ask where you'd rather go?

>> No.16835936
File: 61 KB, 768x960, Ambrosia.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
16835936

>Innovative and unique desert BAD!
>Marshmallows and canned fruit in Cool Whip GOOD!

Do Red Staters really?

>> No.16835942

>>16835894
The Inn is good but Pineapple and Pearl is better tbqh.

>> No.16836074

>>16832912
for me it's the "Spaghetti"

>> No.16836088

>>16835936
t. asian guy recording from his phone

>> No.16836102

>>16836074
The "spaghetti" is a big steak sliced into ribbons table side.

>> No.16836131
File: 167 KB, 879x1200, Jello.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
16836131

>>16836088
Sorry, but name some good midwestern desserts.

>> No.16836136
File: 1002 KB, 1089x1003, 1468688838329.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
16836136

>flyovers once again showing their lack of culture from a lack of understanding of performance art and their refusal to acknowledge that food can be more than just something that tastes good

>> No.16836175

>>16836131
Funnel Cake, or any deep fried candybar. Also, fuck off, we're full.

>> No.16836200

>>16831343
is this that famous Hiroshima Commemorative Dessert I've heard so much about?

>> No.16836215

>>16836175
Funnel Cake is Dutch.
Deep fried candy bars are Scottish.

>> No.16836229

>>16831343
Is this Jewish cuisine?

>> No.16836236
File: 1.13 MB, 1024x898, YWNBAW2.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
16836236

>>16836136
lol

>> No.16836246

>>16836229
No, this is Jewish cuisine.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IFfLCuHSZ-U

>> No.16836264

>>16836215
The majority of people that aren't Mexicans or Somalis are from European decent. I'm in central Texas and we have German and Czech spots all over the place.

>> No.16836270
File: 1.53 MB, 1920x1080, condom.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
16836270

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1PKvqdObaRw

>> No.16836306 [DELETED] 
File: 364 KB, 640x481, 1467665950574.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
16836306

>>16836236
u mad?

>> No.16836315

>>16835788
t.never seen the bean

>> No.16836607

>>16831343
>throws a bunch of shit at a table and walks off
>"here ya go fags that'll be 300 fucking dollars"
Lol what the fuck. Rich people like the weirdest shit

>> No.16836621

>>16832841
He looks like the guy from that one video where Salt Bae is pulling bones out of some ribs and the guy is swooning, about to come in his pants

>> No.16836759

>>16835297
not with black suits, faggot

>> No.16836826

>>16836131
monkey bread
puppy chow
death by chocolate
buckeyes

>> No.16836833

>>16831343
people pay for the show right?

>> No.16836844

>>16836833
If that's the case then they're committing piracy by filming and distributing it.

>> No.16836851

>>16836844
technically they paid for it, and paid for the filming, so they own the rights.

>> No.16836873

>>16836621
> the guy from that one video
LOL that was Diego Maradonna