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/ck/ - Food & Cooking


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13810110 No.13810110 [DELETED]  [Reply] [Original]

/ck/ humor

>> No.13810111

>>13810110
you need to get out more

>> No.13810128
File: 2.96 MB, 568x714, 1582777138559.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
13810128

>> No.13810152

Where did the chicken get the money to buy the eggs?

>> No.13810155

>>13810152
Is a chook not entitled to the sweat of her brow?

>> No.13810166
File: 48 KB, 500x500, 1482454208076.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
13810166

>>13810110

>> No.13810169
File: 65 KB, 720x960, 1483004266288.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
13810169

>> No.13810172
File: 89 KB, 650x1053, 1445381586048.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
13810172

>> No.13810195

>>13810110
Actually chuckled at this, does this make me a boomer?

>> No.13810207
File: 109 KB, 558x559, 1488068973119.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
13810207

>>13810195
yeah loser, sorry

>> No.13810208
File: 37 KB, 498x500, wine.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
13810208

>>13810110
Is some wagie fuck comments on my grocery shopping like that I'll get his pimply ass fired.

>> No.13810212
File: 62 KB, 400x533, 1451452777368.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
13810212

>> No.13810224

>>13810207
Isn't that character canonically straight and only crossdresses to make the girl he's with feel less uncomfortable about taking on a masculine job?

>> No.13810256

If the chicken has money, then why is it relying on the humans to house and feed it? Wouldn't it be better off supporting itself? I can't imagine it has any love for a family that views it as dispoable. Also can the chicken talk? How does it understand English? Where does it keep the eggs before it plants them in the nest? How does it keep them from spoiling? Those 12 eggs are going to be sitting out for 12 days or so and I can't imagine they'd still be good after that long. If I were the chicken, I would buy a half dozen at a time to keep them from spoiling. That's less cost effective though, so maybe I wouldn't.

>> No.13810267

>>13810169
Add a few more slices of meat and grill this, it wouldn't be that bad.

>> No.13810271
File: 30 KB, 381x494, Cow Tools.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
13810271

>> No.13810276

>>13810271
i dont get this one

>> No.13810279
File: 1.03 MB, 1336x4460, Sweet Ramen.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
13810279

>> No.13810285

>>13810271

Normally I love his work, but this one makes no sense to me.

>> No.13810286

>>13810195
It's an indictment of the industrial carnist industry, that the life of a thinking, feeling being as cheaper than the cost of a dozen eggs, while also commenting on the implication that in a capitalist world, we're all only as good as our last envelope. if you laughed, you're a sociopath.

>> No.13810288

>>13810271
>cursed images

>> No.13810290

>>13810128
Well, you can't say this guy doesn't enjoy his work

>> No.13810301
File: 61 KB, 625x701, carpi-sun.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
13810301

>> No.13810304
File: 84 KB, 387x155, Full English Evolution.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
13810304

>> No.13810307

>>13810128
>please don't be cheese
>please don't be cheese
>please don't be cheese
>please don't be cheese
>please don't be cheese
fuck

>> No.13810315
File: 2.94 MB, 2976x2976, Krave.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
13810315

>> No.13810316

>>13810307
>13810307
SAID NOBODY EVER

>> No.13810320
File: 34 KB, 430x394, Pineapple.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
13810320

>> No.13810360
File: 13 KB, 268x288, 1544539985359.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
13810360

>>13810315

>> No.13810361

>>13810271
Took me a while, but that's genius.

>> No.13810363

>>13810128
Why is he wasting half the cheese? Why pour the whole thing out if it's all going to slide off the side? He's just good at playing it off when he fucks up isn't he?

>> No.13810371

>>13810208
>I'll get his pimply ass fired.
Sure you will. Nobody takes your fat ass seriously in real life just like they don't take you seriously online.

>> No.13810372
File: 143 KB, 629x1173, 1581063185923.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
13810372

>>13810315
I hate corporations like you wouldn't believe.

>> No.13810375
File: 70 KB, 1024x768, OBEY.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
13810375

>>13810372

>> No.13810379

>>13810271
Look in the background

>> No.13810385
File: 86 KB, 532x725, coffee1.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
13810385

>>13810372
>>13810375
I hate the people who enable it

>> No.13810392
File: 67 KB, 625x625, 1583370533078.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
13810392

>>13810361
Pls tell, I don't understand

>> No.13810395
File: 449 KB, 970x1139, ALL THE EGGS.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
13810395

>> No.13810397

>>13810111
t. SARS-HIV-nCOV.

>> No.13810399
File: 203 KB, 1280x539, 1533152435265.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
13810399

someone plz eplzain cow tools

>> No.13810402

>>13810224
>not understanding that the point of the picture is to say that all anime is gay
Seriously, anime is fucking gay

>> No.13810417

>>13810276
>>13810392
the joke was supposed to be that cows can't use tools and so their tools would look silly and crude
naturally it was a stupid joke and nobody got it and now he is eternally having to explain it

>> No.13810450

>>13810399
lmaooooooooooo

>> No.13810459

>>13810271
haha because cows are bad at making tools!!

>> No.13810476
File: 460 KB, 1500x1450, dehydrated water.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
13810476

>>13810399
amazing

>> No.13810593

>>13810417
Not just they would look silly and crude, but that they wouldn't look like tools at all. But he fucked up by making the thing on the right kinda look like a handsaw.

>> No.13810805
File: 62 KB, 500x462, 1570907126904.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
13810805

>> No.13810851

>>13810805
dog bles murrika

>> No.13810856
File: 14 KB, 300x283, 7NjvSXo.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
13810856

>>13810208
Whaddaya mean booze ain't food?

>> No.13810881
File: 61 KB, 540x960, if you love it.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
13810881

>>13810805

>> No.13810894

should have known the crab apologists would be out in full force. crabs do breathe air and are a direct contributor to global warming based on the co2 that they produce. they regularly cut underwater cables because they are so stupid, mistaking them for prey. this has caused a sharp spike in the price of teflon, a material that is used. crabs are fucking retarded and should be erradicated as a species. luckily, steps have been put in place by french guiana, in a 2014 study presented to the UN

>> No.13810904
File: 2.87 MB, 360x360, Vegan Crab Cakes.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
13810904

>>13810894
get a grib

>> No.13810909

>>13810110
LOL

>> No.13810914

>>13810224
lmao ferris was a literal sex slave, not a single drop of masculinity on her.

>> No.13810917

>>13810904
this post has been brought to you by crab lives matter

>> No.13810918

>>13810128
based saltbae poster

>> No.13810921
File: 2.73 MB, 538x300, Gun Bae_no audio.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
13810921

>>13810918
Salt is old news

>> No.13810925

>>13810128
Too much meat too much cheese egg is perfect bun looks good too

>> No.13810927

>>13810361
No it really isn't

>> No.13811038

>>13810315
You know when this video was first posted it was when there were very few maymay ads
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yNtySt6Fg30

>> No.13811105

>>13810904
>Vegan Mayo
Die.

>> No.13811137

>>13810271
>>13810285
>>13810593
>>13810417

So it is or at least used to be a big thing everyone "knew" that tool use was what separated humans from all other animals. This was pretty much accepted fact at the time.

The joke is that other animals can't use tools not because they aren't intelligent enough to go about conceptualizing a tool, building it and using it, but because they're just super shitty at building tools.

So making the thing on the right look like a saw isn't a mistake, it's still part of the joke.

>> No.13811167

>>13810208
My local grocery store started metering the customers. There was a line outside, and an attendant only letting a few people in at a time when other people left. I can only assume it's because of retards like you, and nothing to do with the actual virus.

>> No.13811179

>>13810914
>her

>> No.13811333 [DELETED] 
File: 91 KB, 688x688, EPGs0IbX0AAxk-G.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
13811333

>>13810172
uma... sopa de bat-o

>> No.13811372
File: 337 KB, 1280x885, cow tools.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
13811372

>>13810271
>>13810276
>>13810285
>>13810288
>>13810361
>>13810379
>>13810459

>> No.13811397 [DELETED] 

>>13811333
Chinks are disgusting

>> No.13811413

>>13810128
Don't they toss faggots off roofs where he's from?

>> No.13811436

>>13810904
I thougght the point oof being vegan was not eating animal products.

Why do vegans go around and make fake meat?

>> No.13811540
File: 2.34 MB, 1600x1600, 1544428399377.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
13811540

>> No.13811545
File: 56 KB, 1828x274, dad.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
13811545

>> No.13811558

>>13810172
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tebBj42fC3k

>> No.13811560

>>13811105
Yeah, that is concerning to me as well. But the rest of the recipe actually seems pretty good. I just wouldn't call them "crab" cakes.

>> No.13811592

>>13810279
The Eternal

>> No.13811616

>>13811372
God bless you anon

>> No.13811622

>>13811372
Fucking spoilsport.

>> No.13811656

>>13810904
Why do they always have to draw attention to how vegan it is? Can't they call them Crispy Fried Palm Cakes or something?

Also, what the fuck does vegan "mayo" taste like and why does it look like foamy water with no fat content?

>> No.13811666

>>13811656
It tastes pretty much the same. The egg doesn't add much flavor to mayo.

>> No.13811683

>>13810128
I've seen a lot of salt bae shit but this is the first one that made me genuinely irritated

what even is that? is it supposed to be appetizing?

>> No.13811888

>>13811413
No lol, Turks are legendary fags

>> No.13811893

>>13811540
What does the Hampton Creek flavor taste like?

>> No.13811910

>>13811167
tfw not slick enough to bribe the bouncer for entry to the most happening grocery stores on Saturday night

>> No.13811912

>>13811888
No one remember's homosexual rapists with small cocks

>> No.13811913

>>13810208
No you won't lol

>> No.13811918

>>13810208
>spilt

>> No.13811956

>>13811912
⸮huH

>> No.13812007
File: 2.69 MB, 1280x720, 1541143596345.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
13812007

>> No.13812028

>>13812007
.... is this Jack?

>> No.13812030
File: 64 KB, 612x425, cp.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
13812030

>> No.13812045

>>13810169
If that's an okay piece of ham, that shit is delicious broiled.

>> No.13812051

>>13810304
Best

>> No.13812056

>>13810881

ET soup

>> No.13812057

>>13810316
I love a good piece of cheese, but people overuse shitty cheese in their cooking. A slop of melted commodity cheese on every fucking sandwich is gross.

>> No.13812063

>>13810904

anything low carb and gluten free?

>> No.13812069

>>13810914
>lmao ferris was a literal sex slave, not a single drop of masculinity on her.

>Actual history was that he was basically locked in his family's dungeon because of the cat ears until the lady he serves rescued him and cast down his family

>> No.13812071

>humor thread
>0 funny posts

>> No.13812097

>>13812071
That's the joke

>> No.13812130

>>13810904
>canned artichokes and garbanzo beans
>canned heart of palm
why even bother. I get the artichokes and garbanzo but canned heart of palms are fucking FLAVORLESS. how is it supposed to be anything like a crab cake? call it a louisiana falafel at that point.

>> No.13812138

>>13810904
>Frying in oil
into the trash it goes

>> No.13812146

>>13812028
I don't think so. Both his arms work

>> No.13812154

>>13811656
>Why do they always have to draw attention to how vegan it is? Can't they call them Crispy Fried Palm Cakes or something?
Because their purpose is mainly to try to convince people that vegan garbage is "just as good."

>> No.13812157

>>13810304
Holy shit /ck/ + /vp/ needs to be a thing NOW

>> No.13812161 [DELETED] 

>>13810110
Fry up spicy italian sausage, remove and set aside. Add a splash of olive oil to the sausage fat, then add diced onion, bell pepper, and mushrooms with some salt and stir fry until onions are translucent and mushrooms have taken on some color. Add diced garlic, cook 30-45 seconds. Add cooked sausage, dump in a jar of Rao's marinara (with a little water or stock to wash out the jar), and simmer for 15-20 minutes. Stir in some fresh herbs at the end, top with parmesan and more herbs.

>jarred sauce
I literally don't give a shit, Rao's is better than just about any more time-consuming sauce recipe on the internet. Save the hate for Ragu or Prego or some shit.

>> No.13812166

>>13812130
when you call it a Louisiana falafel it sounds pretty good

>> No.13812185

>>13812157
Huh. I didn't even know there was a Pokemon board.

>> No.13812194

>>13810395

wheres the irl remake of this? its hilarious

>> No.13812201

>>13812185
I just visited. It reminded me of how much you really need to lurk before participating in a board. I've played Pokemon must of my childhood and had no clue what half the threads were about.

>> No.13812208

>>13810271
>38 years old

>> No.13812211

>>13810805
:D

>> No.13812219 [DELETED] 

>>13810881
Do N*****s really?

>> No.13812246

>>13810166
remember the episode that shat on british cuisine where the guy ate a sandwich with octopus legs in it, spit it out, and said "ew yuck! there's CHEESE in my sandwich!"

>> No.13812250

>>13810271
This image is literally, materially evil

>> No.13812368

>>13811372

based reply

>> No.13812377

>>13812097
>now 1 funny post
>good job ruining it

>> No.13812395

>>13812130
>louisiana falafel
I would order this not knowing anything about it

>> No.13812443

>>13812030
>Cheese pizza time
this isn't 2004 anon
and this ain't a sink thread

>> No.13812706

>>13810921
>chambered pistol
>pointed at the cameraman
>pointed directly at the cop's hand/fingers

>> No.13812709
File: 795 KB, 900x1273, 1521508645869.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
13812709

>>13810279

>> No.13812712

>>13810301
Oof that's a feel

>> No.13812714

>>13811372
Idk something still eludes me about this one. It's almost like I NEED Larson to have meant something more

>> No.13812727
File: 83 KB, 440x640, 1397755702823.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
13812727

>> No.13812728

>>13812146
Kek
That video seemed too normal for him.

>> No.13812730
File: 348 KB, 536x547, Crab_Lord-1397781357223.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
13812730

>> No.13812731
File: 64 KB, 500x740, MOO-1397757981201.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
13812731

>> No.13812733
File: 16 KB, 320x328, 1397755287752.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
13812733

>> No.13812735

>>13810363
Why is he wasting like 95% of the salt?

>> No.13812738

>>13810212
From the thumbnail that looked like she was eating from a toilet bowl.

>> No.13812742

>>13812130
wtf is heart of palm.

>> No.13812751

>>13812706
>cameraman
tripod
>cops fingers
Retard

>> No.13812764

>>13812751
>tripod
So the camera shake was added in post?

>> No.13812789

>>13812201
It's a terrible place, mostly just porn and arguments

>> No.13812795

>>13812730
Crab apologists, I swear.

>> No.13812806
File: 68 KB, 599x608, 1415054969819.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
13812806

>> No.13812812
File: 2.97 MB, 960x540, You don't have to tell me what happened, but you do have to eat this. as I hand her a bowl of eggs.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
13812812

>>13812194

>> No.13812818
File: 2.89 MB, 360x360, Vegan Mayo.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
13812818

>>13811105
>>13811560
>>13811656

>> No.13812828
File: 13 KB, 528x326, Cat Summoner.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
13812828

>>13812730

>> No.13812839
File: 65 KB, 832x603, YouDonkey.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
13812839

>> No.13812844

>>13812818
why the chickpea water?

>> No.13812850

>>13812844
its viscous, vegans use it as an egg white substitute

>> No.13812856

>>13812818
>>13812850
What's the metal appliance

>> No.13812859

>>13810894
>a material that is used
interdasting

>> No.13812862

>>13810152
Selling eggs.

>> No.13812864

>>13812856
It's just a handheld food processor.

>> No.13812866

>>13810904

get rid of that nasty ass looking "vegan mayo" and id definitely give these a shot

>> No.13812878

>>13812862
>sell free range organic eggs
>buy caged eggs
>pocket the profit
no one will ever know

>> No.13812880

>>13812866
Yeah vegan mayo is ass. It's such a simple pairing, oil and eggs. take one out and it's completely different. not like I've tried every vegan mayo but man that stuff ain't the same

>> No.13812919

>>13810399
hahaha how do i subscribe to this fellow

>> No.13812940
File: 70 KB, 1080x1080, cashier-4u.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
13812940

>>13812733
heh

>> No.13812958

>>13810271
Insanely based

>> No.13812980
File: 38 KB, 429x476, farside.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
13812980

>>13811372
This whole book is damn funny. Especially the section with commentary on comics nobody got. The one with Mr Pembrose the eyeball with anger issues on the shrink's couch had me laughing so hard I couldn't breathe. It's so insanely stupid and unfunny it becomes legitimate comic genius

>> No.13813008

>>13812751
>tripod
>calling others retarded
based retard poster

>> No.13813017

>>13812728
>>13812146
Idk, it looked like that retards general setup, and the way he idiotically twists a fork into the tough skin at the end instead of just cutting the fucker like a normal person makes me think it must be none other than ja/ck/. Might just be before the stroke. Definitely looks overcooked, too.

>> No.13813018

>>13812980
>legitimate
As opposed to illegitimate?

>> No.13813020

>>13812940
I want some spicy chicken mcdo.

>> No.13813058

>>13813018
>he's never witnessed illegitimate comic genius

>> No.13813085

Last time I made a food joke thread I was banned for three days, fuck jannies

>>
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