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/ck/ - Food & Cooking

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File: 50 KB, 1000x1000, Aardvark_2048x.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
10877524 No.10877524 [Reply] [Original]

>Buy this
>It's good

So what exactly is the meme here? I don't get it.

>> No.10877529

Paid viral marketing.

>> No.10877553
File: 52 KB, 491x491, secretretaardvarkpost.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

go away mr moritz.

>> No.10877557

i'd say its pretty mediocre tbqhf
theres a million different better sauces out there that you can get for cheaper

>> No.10877559

Salty flyovers.

>> No.10877564

They're all too spicy and not sweet enough

>> No.10877569

We have it here though

>> No.10877571


Sounds like /pol/ tier tinfoil shit to me.

>> No.10877678

There was a thread months ago where Anon A said it was shit, then Anon B said Anon A was shit and had shit opinions. Anon A got so assblasted that he began spamming the board with how 'Vark was for Soyboys and Cucks and it took off from there.

>> No.10877702

100% wrong, you shill

>> No.10877715

From what I remember it was too harsh for me

Can anybody recommend a better hot sauce? I like Crystal if that's any indication

>> No.10877786
File: 81 KB, 553x1500, 71kJtsSVpaL._SL1500_.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

dunno if this is widely available but I found it at my winco
its similar to crystal but has a way better flavor IMO

>> No.10877790
File: 335 KB, 400x400, 1527045746296.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

I was there and saw it, but okay.

>> No.10877797

moritz is a jewish name, you know

>> No.10877805
File: 417 KB, 1458x476, POL.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]


>> No.10877810

trappeys is good
franks is good

>> No.10877823
File: 63 KB, 375x455, 1531084493817.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Oh, that changes everything, then.

>> No.10877856
File: 868 KB, 1334x750, 92C59C40-D2BE-464A-BD80-895AED701A88.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Why does every guest on Hot Ones say it tastes like shit then?

>> No.10877869

Please never, ever make another thread.

>> No.10877870

If you actually reread the thread Anon A is just mocking the OP (Anon B) for being a hipster from Portland then some other hipster /mu/fag complained about the OP posting about muh secret Secret Aardvark on /ck/ so Anon A started posting it to spite the hipsterfags.

>> No.10878003

Wtf I hate aardvadks now

>> No.10878734

Scott Moritz was actually NatSoc

>> No.10878747

This, vark sauce has the tears and ashes of Jews in it

>> No.10878752

Scott had an entire room dedicated to Nazi pariphinalia.
I went to a Halloween party at Scott's place and he had that room cordoned off with DO NOT CROSS police tape. He got really drunk and someone pulled out a glass bowl and he smoked methamphetamines in front of everyone. He started clenching his jaw really hard and talking a lot. Someone complimented a painting in his living room and he started talking about how he bought it from a SS officer's great grandson. Then one weird quiet guy started taking to him about Hitler and stuff and Scott got up and ran to the room and unblocked it then he ran back to the living room and I'm talking about sprinting back and forth. He ushered me and several other people into that room and started picking things up and pointing things out and explaining the history behind them. Needless to say I was extremely uncomfortable. Scott had like 20 bayonet knives with nazi markings on them. He had several old, tattered swastika flags. The propeller of a Nazi biplane was hanging on the wall. He showed us a rack of real uniforms and he boasted about meeting one of the Nazis that wore it. Most people left the room, and some even left the party at this point. I tried to walk out, but Scott blocked the door and made me help him and that weird guy pull a war chest into the living room. It had to have weighed at least 300lb. I tried to get Scott to calm down and mellow out but he accused me of being a communist which I denied. I tried to excuse myself because I was understandably uncomfortable being there. He opened the chest and pulled out a collection of Luger pistols. He made me sit down and at some point he smoked another bowl of meth. I was frozen as he pulled out pistol after pistol each with several Nazi markings on the barrels and frames. He said they were all matching serial #s and the whole chest was worth $450,000.

>> No.10879024
File: 28 KB, 400x500, 357.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

So what are some good sauces for flavor and heat? Cook for myself so not showing off to anyone or anything just trying to enjoy my food more.
Would something like this be dumb?

>> No.10879032
File: 2.29 MB, 250x142, 1525352239150.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]


>> No.10879087
File: 10 KB, 300x400, 1882O-2T.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Mad Dog 357 is ok if you like mild hot sauces. Try pic related instead. It has flavor and it really pack a punch.

>> No.10879109

Does it also pack a punch on the way out as it implies? Not sure I want quite that much.

>> No.10879120
File: 44 KB, 420x500, colon-cleaner-hot-sauce.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Only if you're a gastrointestinalet

>> No.10879125

Dave's Scorpion Pepper goes really quickly. It's okay spicy but tastes good
mix that with some actual good Dave's like Ultimate Insanity

>> No.10879129

Hahahaha. I love how much of a boogeyman /pol/ has become. You faggots cry about it all the time, but I can guarantee that you go to /pol/ yourselves anyways, making lefty shill threads. Quite sad really

>> No.10879170

>/pol/tards actually think this is what’s going on

>> No.10879178

Rent free

>> No.10879180

How is making politics threads on a politics board shilling?

>> No.10879217

t. Wh*te boi

>> No.10880125

This some good pasta

>> No.10880416

people who don't like 'vark are just spicelets. Real hot sauce guys like us know that the habanero heat is extreme but worth it

>> No.10881558 [DELETED] 

I've tried that. It tasted like a kick to the throat.
It was like someone used the back of my tongue as a rest for shooting a .357 mag from a 2" revolver.

It didn't have much flavor.

>> No.10881595

Honestly I'm a big fan of Cholula. I got a bottle of the new Hot Ones Los Calientes sauce in the mail today, so I'll be trying that soon.

>> No.10881618
File: 171 KB, 510x600, SlightHeat.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

I've tried that before. It tasted like a kick to the throat.
Not much flavor, but it is well named. I imagine that it's close to the experience of sticking a 2" revolver in your mouth and shooting a .357, but without the end of suffering at the bloody end.

Pic related is much better. I add it to some non-hot habanero sauce to give it some heat and more flavor.

>> No.10881924
File: 23 KB, 635x966, Tobasco_53.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

I brefr tobersoc,bedt spic sauas

>> No.10881928


>> No.10881957

>the slander begins
hah that'll teach them to shill on /ck/

>> No.10881980

It's not slander or libel if it's objectively true.

>> No.10882059

>posting anything other than stormfront propoganda on /pol/


>> No.10883260

Correct. Certainly only the best tinfoil, such as the fine packaging products brought to you by the folks at Reynolds! Reynolds Wrap® is so strong, that even when you're flailing at your keyboard calling everyone a kike shill, it stays on your misshapen goy-I mean superlative Aryan head just fine.

>> No.10883288

its mild yet very over priced ketchup

how is that not a meme?

>> No.10883298
File: 711 KB, 580x667, Capture.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Anyone got an archive link for Anon A blasting Anon B in the ass?

>> No.10883654


You can call my mouth an A-hole, because the only that goes inside of it is some v'r'k

>> No.10883809
File: 83 KB, 800x800, Byron-Bay-Chilli-Co-Fiery-Coconut-Chilli-Sauce-250ml.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

pic related is currently the best hot sauce. perfect match of heat and flavor, i go through 2 - 3 bottles a week.
i think it is currently only available in australia, but it will become huge in america eventually.

>> No.10884957
File: 11 KB, 250x210, 1481058542952.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]


>> No.10885008
File: 52 KB, 600x600, IMG_20180701_120203.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Gimme gimme varky cummies
Be they spicy or very nummies.
Spend my hard-earned good-hubby points,
on hipster Portland hot sauce joints.
Wifey's bull lifts me to the car,
To find me varkies near and far.
Enjoy my tasty varky treats,
in comfy Prius heated seats.
Drunk Jerk, Black Bean, Mayo, Hab,
But of my varkies none I have.

She always makes me prep our bull,
But prepping doesn't make me full.
Varkies are the only food,
That puts me in the fapping mood.
I'll dream and doubt but make no fuss,
I'll wish, I'll want, but I won't cuss!
Varkies are my heart's desire,
Fueled by burning, hungry fire.
Wifey cums and wails real hard,
But Tyrone's cum isn't 'vark nor Aard'.

My good-hubby points were fairly earned,
To buy the varkies that I've yearned.
But there's no varkies on my plate!
Did wifey think that I'd just ate?
I cry while looking into her eyes,
While Tyrone hits me to no surprise.
For he who is un-varked is he who understands:
Never forget to shine his new Air Jordans

>> No.10885040

holy shit has moderation of /ck/ actually improved slightly? that thread was absolutely wretched

>> No.10885898

UK when

>> No.10885912

Fucking retards.

>> No.10885917

For chinks is one of the most visited pages, if they make ads in facebook i don't see why they wouldn't make ads here too.

>> No.10885918

You can get it in the UK but it's more expensive than you'd probably want to pay.

>> No.10886011

why did a thread about hot sauce turn into a handful of faggots endlessly arguing with each other?

>> No.10886014

Welcome to 4chan, newfag.

>> No.10887547
File: 101 KB, 1000x1000, IMG_20180502_092406.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

pic related is currently the best hot sauce. perfect match of heat and flavour, i go through 2 - 3 bottles a week.
i think it is currently only available in australia, but it will become huge in america eventually.

>> No.10887698

>unironic australian product shilling
>impact font on an image past the year 2008
>using 2-3 bottles of hot sauce in a single week


>> No.10888224

It'll cost me $20 to get this in Canada (cost of hotsauce + shipping/handling)
Is it worth it?

>> No.10888254

Melindas is legit
marie sharpes is also good

>> No.10888258

If you like extremely sweet and mild habanero flavored tomato sauces you'll LOVE 'vark sauce. $20 is cheap compared to what it costs here in Illinois.

>> No.10888283

were 2 cop?

>> No.10888344


No. It's just above average hot sauce.

>> No.10888413

i hope you like stomach ulcers

>> No.10888438

why? because you have them and you want me to like you?

>> No.10889293


>> No.10890546
File: 360 KB, 2048x1536, IMG_20180711_010408.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Gotta have my 'vark

>> No.10890977


I'm with >>10877571 Lol theres no way vark paid people to meme this hot sauce to some 10 thousand regular visitors just so 1 percent of them would buy the bottle for laffs. It makes no sense. /ck/ is an incredibly small market with very small buyer potential. Your sense of importance is laffable.

>> No.10891006

>vark paid people
It takes one person half an hour a day to post some of this shit on a few sites. If I had a product I wanted to sell, I'd even do it myself. It can't exactly hurt.

>> No.10892704

>tfw craving the vark

>> No.10892737


Seriously though, I just got the same exact thing in your image a few days ago.

>> No.10892871

Scott sounds intense as fuck. Exactly the type of hardcore badass that would enjoy some 'vark

>> No.10894174


>> No.10894261
File: 404 KB, 1600x1200, soy nuggets.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

what do you all like to dip in your 'Vark sauce? For me it's soy nuggets.

>> No.10895413
File: 17 KB, 250x250, 1359973650758.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

>Paying over 10 dollars for a bottle of some gay sauce
r u dumb?

>> No.10895435

In my job I can earn 10 dollars in barely more than 30 minutes. That sauce will give me more joy than those 30-something minutes ever could.

>> No.10895524

cholula is great, not sure it counts as hot though. im a pretty mild whiteboi and its not hot to me

>> No.10895528

does it even taste like hot sauce? looks like itll be some weird flavour mix with some heat thrown in

>> No.10895533

What makes the sauce gay?

>> No.10896097

Yeah I guess I agree. I'm more partial to sauces that taste good and add just a bit of heat though.

>> No.10896437


>> No.10897314

hardly viral.
it's just the state of mind of the people who want us to experience their brand.
if they don't push it hard enough, it's gotta be that we are brainwashed and IT WAS HER TURN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! BLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!!!!
but yes, it's viral and it's ugly. prepare your anus. there's is.

>> No.10897321


>> No.10897528


Good hot sauce isn't made with vinegar.

>> No.10897563

what did he mean by this

>> No.10897953
File: 397 KB, 1024x683, 4603912436_a18f817f75_b[1].jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

tiger sauce

>> No.10898339

Are you me?

t. Louisiana fag

>> No.10898557


Tiger sauce is a good on jambalaya

>> No.10899825
File: 334 KB, 1280x920, chile_soldiers.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Nah. Texas fag.

>> No.10900100

Please stop being homophobic

>> No.10900459
File: 89 KB, 1280x720, 1519486006399.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

>associating a sauce with soyboys and numales is good advertising
bet you think that the soylent memes were viral marketing as well

>> No.10900491

Hey retard you're auto-complete name fagging all over the place.

>> No.10900809


>> No.10900818

you're saying extra for second tier SKUB.

get rekt SKUBFAGS

>> No.10900819



>> No.10900823

I like the flavor it has. especially the lime one.

>> No.10900832

this needs steel drums and some 80's paul simon Jamaican backup singers.

>> No.10900871

Your opinion is shit

>> No.10901134

Red Rooster or Louisiana. Both based

>> No.10901191

From what I heard from marketers and the few company men that have posted on this site, companies actively try to avoid posting on 4chan. Mostly because people here are not receptive to advertisers and because of the anonymous nature of the site. Vark isn't paying people, it's just shit posting. A friend of mine used to make Pizza Hut Dinner box general threads here for no reason other than to shitpost and people thought it was actually paid shilling.

>> No.10901546

t. Vark paid shill

>> No.10901666


>> No.10903436

Page 10!!!! I'll save you!!!

>> No.10903443

damn look at those fat asses

>> No.10903445

fucking based

>> No.10903457

fuck off vark shill

>> No.10904385

No. It's at most a $5 hot sauce. I can't believe it sells for almost $10 at retail.

>> No.10904910
File: 48 KB, 474x460, 1364888170237.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Bought this based on your post. It's fucking incredible.

>> No.10905166

how is the mayo? I thought about getting it

>> No.10905373

The Kardashians could have their own hot sauce brand, and even that would not be more attention-whoring than Secreting Retaardvark.

>> No.10905381
File: 30 KB, 500x500, CURRYDELIGHT-500x500.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

>Curry-type hot sauce

These are pretty good. When I go to Tijuana Flats, I prefer their Tropical Chile Curry Delight.

>> No.10906985

It's really good I think it's even hotter than the hot sauce.

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