Keto Meme Bread

[Anonymous No.10167304]

I'm not exactly on keto but I do prefer a low-carb diet. Lets bake together /ck/

https://www.dietdoctor.com/recipes/the-keto-bread

[Anonymous No.10167310]

got my color basting psyllium root. ready to go

[Anonymous No.10167316]

>>10167310
colon*
the dough seemed okay. little... cardboard feeling...

[Anonymous No.10167326]

topped them with Maldon because sesame seeds are shit-tier toppings for bread.

[Anonymous No.10167329]

>>10167304
GET INTO THE OVEN

[Anonymous No.10167331]

>>10167304
uh oh i definitely didn't leave them enough space for expansion. looking good desu. 30 min

[Anonymous No.10167350]

enjoying an expensive hipster coffee while i wait...

[Anonymous No.10167358]

Bump

[Anonymous No.10167370]

>>10167331

I've made this bread quite a bit. It honestly won't expand too much. You should be good, anon.

[Anonymous No.10167373]

>>10167370
yeah looks ok. my oven is filthy.

[Anonymous No.10167459]

bumping. i'm getting hungry...

[Anonymous No.10167485]

bros i don't think this is lookign too good. I drizzled some olive oil on them to hopefully get some color on the crust. looks fucking raw.

[Anonymous No.10167528]

hows the inside look, op?

[Anonymous No.10167543]

>>10167528
not done m8, still gummy...

[Anonymous No.10167553]

>>10167485
Egg wash?

[Anonymous No.10167558]

>>10167553
your'e right i should have used the yolks i threw out. next time.

[Anonymous No.10167590]

>>10167558
You threw out three perfectly good yolks? Could have made real mayonnaise. Would have given you something to do, too.

[Anonymous No.10167607]

>>10167590
This desu. Wasting the yolks is retarded.

I've bookmarked this recipe. Will look into making it myself some time. What do you think went wrong? Did you follow the directions precisely?

[Anonymous No.10167608]

>>10167590
i know but i was feeling lazy. usually i would save them but then i end up with a bunch of pint containers full of yolks in the fridge and they go bad.

[Anonymous No.10167618]

>>10167607
pretty closely yes but with baking its usually trial and error with recipes. I took them out of the oven now and letting them cool. will update when they are ready to eat. doesn't look too bad imo

[Anonymous No.10167656]

>>10167618
Also report back on whether they give you explosive diarrhea. I'm not even gonna try them until I know the risks.

[Anonymous No.10167679]

damn these are actually really good.

[Anonymous No.10167685]

>>10167679
I'll wait for the bathroom report before mimicking you.

[Anonymous No.10167687]

[Anonymous No.10167695]

>>10167685
lmao ok will report

[Anonymous No.10167709]

Toast one or grill one in a pan with butter. I want to see how well it does.

[Anonymous No.10167717]

>>10167709
little grilled cheese action? comin up

[Anonymous No.10167734]

>>10167717
Yas. Do it.

[Anonymous No.10167745]

>>10167717
If it works I'm definitely turning to this.

[Anonymous No.10167751]

here we go lads

[Anonymous No.10167755]

[Anonymous No.10167788]

>>10167304
>people on a no carb fad diet
>constantly going out of their way to eat bread

fuck off already with this keto shit

[Anonymous No.10167794]

Crumb side to the pan! I gotta see if the crumb can go golden. Butcher one if you have to. It begs the question: why can't a larger loaf be made? Is the rise so weak that it won't work?

[Anonymous No.10167798]

>>10167794
probably. next time i'll try to do a regular loaf.

[Anonymous No.10167804]

>>10167788
This one is for science. If you're not legitimately curious if fake bread can make a grilled cheese, I don't know what to tell you.

[Anonymous No.10167814]

little golden, very tasty. it does have a slight bitter aftertaste but it's fine.

>>10167788
some of us like to avoid our carbs to cut and it turns out that grilled cheese and sandwiches are fucking delicious ffs.

[Anonymous No.10167819]

i will definitely make this again this week.

[Anonymous No.10167820]

>>10167798
Hey, I see some Maillard on the top of that crust. Very promising.

[Anonymous No.10167825]

>>10167820
best gluten free shit i've ever had desu

[Anonymous No.10167844]

>>10167788
Actually you won't see a lot of people go out of their way for this stuff. This is like vegans creating fake meat products. Some might like it, but serious people do not. Bread itself isn't even that high carb in some cases. I could easily eat a sandwich on keto. It's just that I never really enjoyed bread in the first place.

[Anonymous No.10167849]

>>10167819
I wonder if some cheese baked on top of the rolls would work. Seems to take a long time to bake. What's up with the boiling water? Does this activate the almonds, or make the laxative husks bind to the egg whites?

[Anonymous No.10167868]

>>10167825
That's probably because most of it tries really hard to avoid eggs (as in, veganry). I think the albumin is what's holding the fiber particles together. The almond flour is giving it the mass.

[Anonymous No.10167895]

>>10167849
>literally activating the almonds
kek, i think that is whats happening. don't know really. i think it took about 75 minutes to bake, i would use higher than 350F next time. cheese on top would definitely work. you could do an italian herb and cheese mix in the dough. sounds good.

[Anonymous No.10167898]

>>10167868
thats true gluten free shit from cafes and restaurants are always vegan. fucking disgusting sawdust baked goods.

[Anonymous No.10167914]

>>10167895
I wonder what would happen if you beat the shit out of some egg whites, then gently folded the dry ingredients in. Could you get an airier crumb?

[Anonymous No.10167925]

>>10167914
thats an interesting idea but i'm not sure how well it would hold up.

[Anonymous No.10167938]

>>10167925
Well, soufflé-like technique with soft peaks, yet with the almond flour and some husk for tooth. I think it could work.

[Anonymous No.10167956]

guys i just farted and it was completely rancid

>>10167938
maybe i'll try it tomorrow. dump the whole mix into a small pan to make a loaf?

[Anonymous No.10168001]

>>10167956
Yeah, I'd start with the loaf size experiment first.
This is why you're diarrhea-testing the recipe for us.

[Anonymous No.10168009]

>>10168001
To be fair diarrhea can be a godsend on keto. Some people don't get the fiber they need and end up backed up.

[Anonymous No.10168016]

>>10167956

[Anonymous No.10168017]

>>10168001
if anything this should help my gut. lately i've been shitting loose stool multiple times a day. not sure why.

[Anonymous No.10168026]

>>10168009
Ah, maybe so. Perhaps this balances the digestional equation. I've been doing this for years, but I wouldn't consider myself constipated. Every 2.5 days, the poop logs slide right out of my ass.

[Anonymous No.10168046]

>>10168017
Ah. Have you just started this? Are you eating more vegetables than you used to? I hear this a lot.

[Anonymous No.10168061]

>>10167788
Fuck off faggot that's my boyfriend your talking about

[Anonymous No.10168119]

>>10168046
no desu i think its too much hot sauce and other weird shit i eat like lots of pickles. also booze on the weekends.

[Anonymous No.10168162]

>>10168119
That sort of invalidates your rancid fart observation. Gonna have to wait for a conclusive sign this fake bread recipe actually makes your ass explode.

[Anonymous No.10168192]

>>10168162
For instance! The last time I ate gluten-free crap, some friends were doing a dumb experiment. I heard them talking about changing the proportions of fucking everything. Particularly notable was how they were talking about using 3-5 times more xantham gum powder. I had like two bites of the end result and was violently shitting about one hour later. I think it it's gonna do anything, it's gonna happen pretty fast.

[Anonymous No.10168215]

>>10168192
Otherwise, it seems like a safe recipe so far. It's been almost two hours.

[Anonymous No.10168249]

>>10168215
op here. i feel fine. i also ate dinner, pork with veggies. im going to make another batch of this bread tomorrow and include a roll with my lunch at work.

[Anonymous No.10168266]

>>10167304
>low-carb

why do people fall for this shitty meme

[Anonymous No.10168278]

>>10168249
All right, cool. Sounds safe. Gotta see a full slice of fake bread.

[Anonymous No.10168298]

>>10168266
it works faggot

[Anonymous No.10168314]

>>10168298
This desu. It stops water retention in its tracks and gives you a really steady energy boost with zero cravings when you enter ketosis.

[Anonymous No.10169088]

>>10167304
Even 70g net carbs per day is still "low carb."
As long as you don't eat many carbs at breakfast and lunch, you can still have regular bread at dinner.

[Anonymous No.10169321]

>>10169088
Yeah, but it really kills variety when you're wasting so much carb intake on bread.

[Anonymous No.10169336]

>>10169088
i try to keep it at 30g or less desu. realistically im probably hitting around 50-70 when you add up all the small shit from beans, lentils, and nuts. i wake up and have 30g of oats and 1 scoop of whey with water and a coffee. lunch is spinach salad with lentils. dinner is chicken with veggies and lentils and another scoop of whey. it has been working for me i've shed a decent amount of fat and still have decent gains. pretty sure this diet has me at a caloric deficit. soon i'm switching to slightly above required now that im getting into more heavy and frequent lifts. i went from 18+% bodyfat to 11-12% in about 2 months.

[Anonymous No.10171033]

that almond flour shit is way too expensive. 15€ for 1kg here.

[Anonymous No.10172165]

Op here. I ate the last two rolls as slider sandwiches for lunch. Taking a nice healthy shit right now. No issues

[Anonymous No.10172171]

>>10172165
gj m8

[Anonymous No.10173242]

>>10172165
Cool. I'll try this recipe out sometime. I never really missed bread, but I can see it being useful for hamburgers at a barbeque in the summer. I could show up with a bag of my own snowflake princess hamburger buns like a huge faggot. It would be funny as hell. Still gonna try to make the BIG KETO LOAF?