/ck/ - Food & Cooking

>>9647588
Got off the bus, about to cross the street, looked both ways, old lady starts to cross, pull her out of the way of a speeding car. Saved a life on the way to the liquor store. She was going there, too.

>>9647588
5 minutes ago, I'm at step 5 nigga

>>9647604
Nice. I'll bet saving someone's life is a good feeling. Did she buy your booze when you got to the liquor store?

goodnight al/ck/s

>>9647613
She didn't, but I didn't expect her too. She just said stuff about why she doesn't drive anymore. I didn't even think about it at the time, but it did feel good when I got home and realized what had happened. If I wasn't a drunk, I wouldn't have been taking the bus to buy cheap ass vodka. Irony in action.

combination of xanax, valium, carisoprodol, and benadryl is kicking in
bed time soon

>>9647633
I like a benadryl after a night of drinking. But man, that shit lasts all the next day.

>>9647588
Don't remember, bro. I just woke up. I pissed myself again and I'm on the floor of my apartment I think. I actually don't want to get up because I feel like the world isn't spinning while I'm down here. I feel like if I stay down here with piss soaked pants time stands still.

But that's not true.

I drank half a fifth of Smirnoff at a Halloween party

It was smooth (smoother than most (all?) other Vodkas I've had, which surprised me)

Anyway, we were smoking cigars on the porch and I was drunk enough to agree to do a "put em in a coffin" thing while making fun of a retard we all knew. I did it in on a shrub and completely flattened it and someone filmed it.

Later we got in an uber to my friends house and we were yelling at thots dressed like utter sluts on the sidewalk from the window of the car. Like literally yelling "SLUT" and the thot turned around and flipped us off. The uber guy was Muslim though so he enjoyed it.

Then I agreed to smoke weed (which I swore off for years) and walked home drunk at 3am. On the way home I went into a McDonalds bathroom and pissed on the toilet paper roll next to the toilet and got a 2 McChickens and an ice cream cone to go.

>>9647638
I take it every night, I don't know what normal is anymore

I did a fuckload of dillies yesterday, woke up at 10 and drank a pint of vodka now im shitposting and eating pizza. Other than my whole body hurting when I move im pretty comfy

>>9647646
Sounds like a successful night.

>>9647646
absolute madman

>>9647588
I'm looking to get into alcoholism, where do I start?

>>9647653
I love dillies. Wish I could get my hands on some.

>>9644226
>>9644125
>>9644059
>>9644040
i ended up not going and sleeping in at 3pm instead because i could only think of bad things that could happen if i went and not any good ones

i really wish i had some beer, i feel agitated

>>9647704
>>9647710
speaking of this, i had a terrible sleep today. why is sleeping so difficult?

>>9647646
>The uber guy was Muslim though so he enjoyed it
kek

>>9647653
>>9647663
dillies? are you referring to that commercial? because if you are, Budweiser has terrible water that taints all of their beer. I'm legitimately surprised that their brand is the number one in America.

>>9647677
I thought he was talking about dilaudid morphine

>>9647684
Oh, that's good too. I prefer my perkies.

About to take my first end of day sleep sober in well over a year.

This doesn't feel right.

>>9647704
have fun waking up every few hours. put a cover over your eyes (I use a blanket) so the night hag don't getcha!

>>9647588
About 5 minutes ago. Watched this high (https://youtube.com/watch?v=dZLLPaX4SS4)), had a hugely satisfying fap, am now in bed eating breakfast tendies, watching YouTube and smoking huge amounts more weed. It’s like a vacation from the hell of alcoholism. I never want to go back to drinking

>>9647832
many paths to choose from but they all end in hell

>>9647918
me neither, anon. me neither.

them ass holes on x changed the sticky pic and it fugged me up i need a little sippy poo

>>9647985
just drink because you want to you fucking spineless cunt

why make up pathetic excuses

>>9647985
/x/ posters are human garbage. kys

Would the sole, ranting kid ITT please report to >>>/b/ immediately. Thanks

Get Out is on. I'm drunk. Should I watch?

I would like to get into alcohol. I have always been the good boy and never had a beer in my life but it's been one year since I turned 21 and I feel like trying it. What type and brand of beer should I try first? There's not plenty of variety here, the only thing on the shelves that catches my eye is Heineken.

>>9648073
>What type and brand of beer should I try first?
Not a craft beer. Beer is simply too diverse and varied to get a good picture of what beer is actually like. Craft beers intentionally try to be their own thing to secure their place on the market by just being actually unique.

That said, Heineken is actually pretty bad for its price point. I recommend Coors Light to see if you can stomach beer at all, and if you find it too light you should try Black Label if they have it in your area. Molson products tend to be good and cheap but idk if they exist in your area.

wanna smash that dude on the right btw is that nip moot next to trap moot??

How much does it take the average normie to get drunk?

>>9648129
i usually hear that 2 drinks is too much to drive safely anymore but thats only tipsy. 3-5 is more of a party for a normal adult, more than 5 for a late high school or college age real good party

>>9647588
I'm happy now. It's why I drink.

>>9648133
>3-5 is more of a party for a normal adult, more than 5 for a late high school or college age real good party
Either this is extremely conservative or I've completely lost sight of what a normal tolerance is meant to feel like.

3 standards for men and 2 standards for women in one hour is the guideline for being too drunk to drive, but how much alcohol is in your blood doesn't necessarily correlate with how drunk you actually feel obviously, that's a personal thing.

>>9648133
>more than 5
my sides and liver are bulging.
Not to play the one up game, but thats fucking to adorable you're even trying to claim that as a "real good high school/college" party.

>>9648145
>Either this is extremely conservative
to be fair, im going by workplace health and safety posters/lectures, which tend to be real conservative.

personally, I think my tolerance is pretty normal and I'm just good at maintining composure, but definitely feel drunk, forget things, etc. after about 3 drinks, and usually have to stop at 8. I can go as hard as 10 if I'm having fun or it's a longer night. having a proper meal at some point helps too.

>>9648160
depends how long the party is, really, I generally consider a night out to be 3-ish hours. Just the size of a stomach would probably limit you pretty harshly after a certain point. I know I've gotten sick just on over-drinking but without feeling drunk.

If you're sitting at the bar literally all day, yeah, of course you're going to knock back like 20-30 drinks.

>>9648112
Thanks. What makes Heineken bad? At least judging by looks and ads it's the one that appealed most to me. And what differences are there between German and American beer?
That guy on the right is Zun, the creator of Touhou. He is a beer addict.

>>9648160
>Not to play the one up game, but thats fucking to adorable you're even trying to claim that as a "real good high school/college" party.
i like how "more than five" to you, a range that literally extends to infinity, is a small number. whatever. thats america for you

>>9648195
>And what differences are there between German and American beer?
few that matter because heine is very americanized

>>9648205
You're right about that guy being obnoxious but I'd say going through a six pack while watching a game of football wouldn't be far from standard.
Either way we could argue about 'how much is a lot' for years and get nowhere, some girls have three beers and are done for the night and some guys are pretty underweight too.

>>9648195
If you're looking to find a beer to stick with just try a few here and there and find one with a good ratio of strength and affordability that you don't mind. Obviously beers do taste different but once you're drunk you aren't going to give much of a shit. Unless you're the type to drink a couple beers for the flavour and then stop completely, in which case I'd tell you it's probably not really worth starting to drink in the first place.
Personally I drink Asahi, standard strength, easy to drink, pretty standard beer price in my area.

>>9648235
>watching a game of football
a game of football is like ten years long.

still, like I said, I'm going off of health and safety posters and doctors' lectures. you asked what normies drink -- not what battle hardened ex-line cooks on /ck/ drink. You asked a question, you got a fucking answer; you can fuck off if you don't like what you got returned.

I don't drink during the day or before classes but once night hits I love drinking and I hate falling asleep sober. Sometimes I'll take 3 or 4 shots before falling asleep for absolutely no reason. I know it'll just make me sleep worse or upset my stomach.

Is this Alcoholism setting in or am I just a mongoloid?

>>9648278
Why not both?

>>9648300
:(

Since I'm 3 hours away from one week sober I'm calling it a week sober.

I've started dreaming again. Really weird dreams too.

>>9648382
You sould drirnk

>>9647918
Nice one m8. I’m getting sober as well so I’m thinking off putting the saved money in a little pipe and some weed again and just living the comfy homebody life with bowls, cups of tea and wholesome entertainment.

>>9648240
I wasn't the one who asked the question you dumbass drunkard, and stop getting defensive, there was nothing aggressive in my post.

>>9648382
Stay out of these threads if you're trying to stop drinking, it's just going to get you thinking about it. Even if it's portrayed in a negative light it's still not what you want to think about.

>>9648397
Nope. They all close in forty minutes and amazing after only a week I don't have the cravings for booze. I can't stop drinking coffee and green tea though.

>>9648430
I'll be fine. I'm surprisingly not craving it. Strange because until a few days ago longest I'd gone without booze in around 3-4 years was 4 days.

>>9648430
Not him but these threads help me stay sober.

Pissed himself in the floor anon example, helps remind me why I don’t want to go out for a fifth of vodka.

>finally beginning to push through the sickness that stops me drinking 24/7
it's not easy to down a drink when I feel like absolute shit but I'm starting to manage, worth it to be drunk all day everyday

anyone struggle with pushing through that wall? how did you overcome it if you did

>>9648481
>how did you overcome it if you did

By drinking more. Though the only thing that really ever got in the way was heartburn but I still managed to push through that although sometimes it got so bad I just had to stop.

>>9648481
sleep and soup

why would you drink if you're sick? have a fucking nap

Half bottle Jack's 375ml doesn't do it anymore. What do now?

>>9648490
I drink if I’m sick. I got through heroin cold turkey like 50 times by just getting blackout drunk day and night for a week. That’s why I hate alcohol WD so much, it’s the only thing i can’t make better with booze.

>>9648511
Start a career as a prawn fisherman in Cambodia

>>9648488
I've never experienced heartburn but I've heard from a lot of you that it's a big issue, I think that may be something caused in part with pre-existing issues like weight and diet. The thing that stops me from drinking more often is lack of energy or feeling horribly sick to the point of not being able to stomach alcohol

>>9648490
>why would you drink if you're sick?
because I don't want to be sober?

why the fuck are you asking why someone would drink when they're sick in a thread about alcoholism I mean come on...really?

>>9648530
>hey guys im not enjoying drinking. what booze should i drink?

only an american would think this is a reasonable question

>>9648536
wasn't at all my question and I'm not American

nice try though

>>9648536
What? That's alcoholism. Only Americans do that then?

>>9648625
>alcoholism means you don't enjoy drinking

>>9648205
>>And what differences are there between German and American beer?
>few that matter because heine is very americanized
Heineken is Dutch.
>>9648195
There's nothing really wrong with Heineken, you just have to find a beer you like. And the difference between German and American beer is that mainstream American beer sucks, but America has a much wider variety of types of craft beers or micro-breweries, which Germany doesn't have, because it's restricted to 4 ingredients by law (Reinheitsgebot).

sick of hangovers
sick of Mondays

>>9648883
>sick of hangovers
drink more water

I drink 2L+ every night before bed depending on how much I've drunk, also drinking water while drinking

hangovers are hardly a problem for me anymore

though that could be because I'm used to them now

>>9648881
>Heineken is Dutch.
and yet it tastes identical to everything produced by Molson and Carling

you all ever get so angry and tard rage against the jews so much that you realize that capitalism is a decaying monument to judaism and the libcunt arguments have some merit in their anti-zionism and anti capitalism and that modern american cuckserativism is propping up a dead kike on a stick at the expense of white folks

>>9649103
no but i do something similar with americans. americans are genuine filth and i wish for nothing but the worst for them all. i'm pretty sure that most if not all of my sources of unhappiness are either from americans or american influence over non-americans. if there were no more americans or america, i think the world would be a happier and more functional place.

>>9649103
>>9649112
can you go back where you came from? This really has nothing to do with alcoholism.

>>9649124
SHILLS ON HIGH ALERT OY VEY

Well boys, I'm on trazodone now for insomnia and the doc says it will kill me if I drink and take that, so guess I'm going sober for now. Enjoy one on the rocks for me.

>>9648525
Fucking lol

>wake up before anyone else
>nothing to do
>like five episodes of vice principals to catch up on
Time to get drunk enough to eat leftover checkers at ten am wooooo

I've been sober for three years, but being around you all for the past few days makes me want to day drink today

I was supposed to help my dad with some yardwork, but instead I spent the entire weekend drunk and never made it over to his house, so he did the work without me. My plan for today is to drink a lot of beer and watch some football this afternoon, but soon I want to make it up to my dad. Any suggestions on how I should do this? He is very disappointed with me right ow.

>>9649146
I've drank on 150 mg of traz, then again I hate my life and dont care. I find drinking on naltrexone to be shit

What're your house rules for drinking, boys? I never drink before noon, no matter what. Lets me feel like I have some control.

>>9649312
Drink at least a little before sleep

>>9649312
No hard liquor.

>>9649146
trazodone is poison. Made me freak the fuck out. It's not a very good drug.

>>9649233
How about you from spend the day with your dad instead of watching niggers and commercials all day

>>9647588
>Your most recent happy memory edition
Last night was pretty nice when the bottle was almost empty and I knew I had some more beers to solidify the drunk until bedtime. Also, I got invited to do a speech and some workshops at a local university last week, which felt pretty good, if a bit stressful.

I drink a bottle of wine pretty much every night with a few strong beers either before or after. Not sure if I should start tapering off and be sober for a few weeks to "reset".

>>9649312
no drinking before midnight. the drink for 3-4 hours and go to bed.

I quit nicotine and I have no motivation to do anything

>>9648917
it’s what it does to my mood
I don’t have physical symptoms

>>9649312
I have none other than "don't get too hammered around family" (excluding my brother who used to be my roommate).
Vodka in the morning, vodka in the evening.
If I had a job I probably wouldn't drink heavily beforehand, alas I have enough money to get me by for a while. I haven't worked since I became al/ck/ three years ago.

>>9649432
I’ve been drinking more since I quit smoking

drinking piss warm beer all morning and not even drunk yet, fuck.

Honestly don’t feel like I drink more than most people because I’m sadder than most people but just because I enjoy being drunk more than most people honestly

>>9649384
Nah, he has other plans. And my dad is an aggressive man with a vicious temper and I think it would be wise to keep my distance until next weekend.

>>9649451
please send help. I just want to get drunk!

>>9649519
Drink as quickly as possible, forgive yourself in advance for the heartburn, and next time don’t buy a poof’s drink

I'm about halfway through my beers for the day and I don't really want to buy more. Will popping a few ativan help me keep feeling good for the rest of the day? I have a prescription but normally only take them when I am having anxiety attacks.

Have you ever been to a marriage, al/ck/ ? How did you survive it ?
>Be me, 23 yo
>Gave up on getting pussy, exercising, having friends and socializing in general
>Focuse only on studies and cutting my drinking until I get my shit together
>Parents still tolerates my presence more or less
>Be with them and, cousin and uncle at restaurant yesterday
>Quietly drinking my pint when successful 24 yo cousin says he as an annoucement to make
>He's getting married to his Arab gf next year
>Nearly choke on my beer
>Ask him if I'll be invited for the divorce too
>everybody laughing because they took it as a joke
>It wasn't
>nervouslaugh.gif
>Cousin tells me not to worry, there'll be alcohol
>The future bride's family will be there, half of them are jewish, half of them muslim
>Most of my humor revolves around /pol/ jokes when I'm drunk
>wellfugg dot jaypeg
What the fuck do I do, al/ck/ ? Should I invent an excuse not to go to his marriage and avoid a potential disaster, or should I go, get drunk quietly and shut the fuck up for the whole night to avoid being disowned by my whole family ?

>>9649571
Get drunk quietly and shut the fuck up for the whole night obvi

>>9649571
Keep quiet at the begininng, don't over do it (I know all much easier said than done), when people are drunk you might find people who enjoy your "edgy" humour, you might want to stay away from larger groups of people (you might blurp something out that triggers Oma Goldstein). Best thing to do is find someone sympathetic and hang out with them, while staying away from the larger groups.

>>9649571
Go, get drunk, and be a loud, obnoxious idiot. But, for the sake of all that's holy, record it for us!

>>9649557
yeah they're better than alcohol imo

>>9649557
ativan feels better than drinking imo.

>>9649618
ayyy

>>9649312
Never before 3PM, prefer to wait until 5PM to avoid hangover that comes from prolonged drinking. Try to be in bed by 10:30, 9 if it's a weeknight. If I'm having more than a bottle of wine, I better not have anything important to do tomorrow morning.

Beer only when in unfamiliar company, such as family of a friend or friends of friend. I've gotten too fucked up on gin in front of a friend's dad, and while we had a great time, my power level started showing towards the end of the conversation.

Good scotch is only for sharing or celebrating personal career success.

>>9649571
I've been to three weddings and they usually have open bars. I offer to drive, and let my old lady get hammered ("hey, babe we're about to be leaving but there's an open bar, so go bananas).
She makes a fool of herself, I look responsible, and I get to get drunk as fuck in a hotel room alone after she passes out.
If you don't have a significant other, just fuckin' have a teeny weeny bit of self control.
I know, I'm lucky.

>>9649618
>>9649622
How do I get pls (don't just answer "find a shady psychologist").

>>9649623
I went full /pol/ at my grandma's birthday party. There was a mixed race family there. They weren't too happy with me. I drank a lot, chain smoked and ranted about politics. I don't get invited to these things anymore.

>>9649634
find a shady psychologist
or buy them online
or buy some clonazolam which is legal and cheaper

>>9649628
>>9649571
This is pretty interesting to me, too. As a single, 26-year-old man, I'm not entirely sure how the hell to navigate weddings. I typically end up getting drunk early and excusing myself as soon as the major reception events are done. When the DJ actually starts playing dance/party music, I'm out of there ASAP.

There's usually close family there, but they all have significant others. I have no idea who to talk to other than immediately family/friends, and usually they know a hell of a lot more people than me and want to do the socializing rounds.

Maybe I should start finding excuses not to attend weddings. Feels like an obligation, rather than a privilege.

>>9649639
I would say that this is a good solution, but I even got completely plastered on red wine and vomited all over the place at a cousin's wedding, and I still get invited to every event, usually with a chiding "Careful of the open bar, Anon!"

>>9649643
1. Oh haha
2. Nah I'm good
3. Are you a burger? I am.

>>9649634
I got mine from my family doctor, but I have been seeing this guy for my entire life and he knows I have legitimate anxiety issues, I have been prescribed ativan for 3 years and this is the first time I am considering using them recreationally. Pharmacists are dicks about dispensing it, covering their own asses I guess, but they will look for any reason to not fill your prescription. My family doctor actually reprimanded my pharmacist for this.

>>9649611
Seems like a good advice. Also, I don't try to be edgy, I can't take /pol/ seriously, I just like to laugh at stuff I shouldn't.
>>9649614
Will do if shit really goes south.
>>9649628
Don't have a SO, left my previous girlfriend of two years a year ago because I figured she'd be happier without an alcoholic wreck like me.

>>9647588
I sat alone against the wall smoking and drinking cheap alcohol 9 hours straight.

>>9649685
You're a smart man. I know that it's cliché, but you have to love yourself before you can love anyone else. Otherwise your self loathing just manifests itself in the most ugly of possible ways.

>>9649685
/pol/ has it's moments. I genuinely believe that unchecked Muslim immigration is a threat to our way of life. Even some liberals like Bill Maher acknowledge this, but the general trend among left-wing types is to ignore the toxicity of Islamic culture.

>>9649672
Yep I'm in the US

>>9647832
Drink sissy stuff like mixed drinks with only one shot of spirits. Steadily move up until you need an entire 750mL to feel normal.

>>9649751
>Me
>Smart
Smart is a huge stretch, at most I'm not too stupid to function more or less socially when I have to. Also, that's not stupid. In fact that's pretty true. But sometimes loving yourself is denial of reality.
>>9649762
I'm thinking the same but, but I suggest we keep /pol/ in /pol/ since we're here to talk about alcoholism.

Need to go to doctor but for whatever reason afraid.

almost 26 and im sure my blood pressure is shit, not sure how my liver is, or cholesterol.

probs gonna go next month

>>9649895
>I suggest we keep /pol/ in /pol/

Fair enough.

pouring some svedka
it would be noon if it weren't for DST so it's not too early

>>9649926
I'm 30 and a chronic alcoholic. My physical health is top-notch, but I eat healthy and work out. Still, I think you are too young to be "afraid," just start taking better care of yourself in other ways if you are not ready or willing to give up the bottle.

>>9649666
If you don't want to go to that sort of event, say you can't cause you're buried under work and pulling extra hours. Don't have job ? Say that you're searching for one. That way you'll also seem like a productive guy while avoiding bullshit events like this.

>>9649971
I do have a comfy tech job, and the problem is that I travel often and my family and friends know I can take off of work whenever I want. I'd have to have already actually scheduled something upon getting the invitation to really pull it off, I would think.

>>9649312
No drinking before 8:00 PM.
Measure your drinks/shots, don't freepour.
No meals while drinking heavily, only "finger food".

>>9650138
lmao fuckin pussy

>>9650013
>comfy IT job
Congrats anon. Gonna graduate next year, I hope I'll land one too. Why is it so impossible to tell your family and friends your boss needs you on some uber-important project and unfortunately you can't go ? Are they spying on your work schedule or what ?

>>9650191
It wouldn't be impossible, but I've got a pretty hard rule about not straight up lying to anyone. I'd rather tell someone that I really just don't want to attend than completely lie. Even still, I suppose part of me knows I should go, at least for appearances. I think the real goal is figuring out how to make the experience tolerable, rather than avoiding being there altogether.

>>9650214
I'm skipping my cousin's engagement party right now as I type this. I didn't go into details, I just said I had another commitment. What I did not say was that this commitment happened to be getting drunk and watching the Broncos game, but I wasn't totally dishonest. Apparently they are having an open bar, so I might have made a mistake.

>>9647588
A friend gave me a jar of orange creamsicle moonshine. I drank it all. I feel nothing inside.

>>9650321
I live next door to the Broncos stadium. Please don't tell me it's a home game

>>9650328
Nah man, they are playing in Philly

>>9650327
you're gonna be feeling it tomorrow morning, that shit gives awful hangovers

>>9650340
Hope you're an Eagles fan. If not, maybe you can still make the party.

>>9647832
I recommend jumping straight into vodka/other unsugared spirits, you could cut out 90% of the excessive fat gain I've had by doing so. It's also slightly more cost effective.

>>9650394
Yeah, it's not looking good for Denver. Still, I don't really want to spend the afternoon with my extended family, even with free booze.

>>9649312
I actually have set rules I've thought about.

1) Vodka only, it's arguably the cleanest alcohol, I water it down.
2) If I have some important work thing, no drinking the day before.
3) Drink 2 pints of water before bed.
4) No junk food, just clean paleo eating. Normally if I'm drinking all Sunday like today, I will make an extra meal in the morning so I can warm it up while drinking. Actually paleo has helped me cut back on drinking a lot.

>>9649312
I don't drink past midnight.
I don't drink hard liquor everyday unless its a special occasion.
I only have up to 4 beers during a weeknight.

I am so fucking bored now

>>9649961
how much do you drink

Just blew my nose and after taking the tissue away had yellow-tinted WATER running out of my nose for about 3 seconds on to the floor. Not mucus, actual fucking WATER like someone just turned a fucking tap on. What the FUCK. That's never happened before in my life. Am I going to die?

>>9650457
paleo is another word for "eating whatever you want" lol

it's literally a diet of meat.

>>9650803
>it's literally a diet of meat.
No it isn't, fucking retard.

>>9650488
i'd rather have no beers than 4, too much of a tease

I'm the guy who was here earlier posting about using my ativan recreationally, I took a few of them and I don't like this. I feel confused and disorientated, but I still have beer to drink and I need to make dinner. I will not be doing this again.

>>9650877
each tot heir own i guess.

>>9650755
Sounds spooky.

>>9650457
Alcohol isn’t paleo though. Switch to proper nomadic drugs like weed and shrooms.

>>9650914
Alcohol forms naturally in the form of mead, it's how we found it in the first place. We've been consuming it for over 10,000 years.
It's very paleo.

>>9650925
alcohol is super agricultural. It's the reason we switched from hunting and gathering to farming. People needed to drink and they couldn't get enough without basing their whole civilization on it.

>>9650925
The oldest evidence of alcohol is about 7000 years old, well into the neolithic. We have probably had some by fermenting honeywater with wild yeast as you said in the paleolithic era, but non-sedentary hunter-gatherers gathering enough wild honey to get the tribe drunk on a regular basis is unrealistic.

Regular boozing become possible only with agriculture. It came along with the loss in nutrition, shitty diet, bad health, warfare, hierarchy, work, specialisation, epidemics et cetera that came along with that invention.

As a staple drug it's one very much linked to civilisation.

>>9650877
pussy

>>9650953
>on a regular basis
I never said that, I just said that alcohol can be found naturally.

>>9650957
Technically, sure, but so can grains and sugars.That doesn't mean eating white bread and drinking soda are part of a paleo diet any more than your refined industrial alcohol is though.

Just because it can be found naturally doesn't mean it was part of the evolutionary diet of homo sapiens, which is what the whole paleo diet meme seeks to emulate.

my mom told me "dry out" a nd that i can't drink here anymore

fuck

I didn't even do anything weird while drunk.

>>9650998
Al/ck breathe?

I need advice:

I might drink 500ml+ of bourbon in 2hours. But I don't feel drunk enough, and want to be more 'drunk'. BUT i get nauseas and dizzy at this level.

How can I make the drunk feeling more intense, if I simple drink more I just puke or the room spins.

>>9651011
why does it matter if I drink if I don't do anything dumb? I just want to be left alone to my vices.

>>9651068
mix pills with booze obviously

>>9651089
>I just want to be left alone to my vices.
Holy fuck I just had a deja vu
I swear I typed that same sentence six months ago somewhere

>>9651068
Eat a bunch of sugar

floating on benzos and brandy and can't get off this song
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LxZDxF0MyV0

>>9651068
Drinking alcohol hot seems to increase its effectiveness. Speed-balling 500ml with an energy drink will send you to new levels of existence, or cause a seizure.

>>9651093
which pills specifically?

>>9651114
interesting, how does that work?

>>9651127
I've experimented a little with drinking faster, as in 10 shots in 20 minutes to make a kind of rush thing happen, it kinda works. But why hot?

>>9650956
Suck my dick, bitch.

>>9650877
k-pins are way better than ativan imo

>>9647646
Oh yeah another good drunk story

>With the guys from this story
>Cruising around fucking with homeless people
>Guy in the back seat is making mixed drinks (whiskey and coke I think)
>Pull up to the front of the left turn lane at a major intersection
>Doing shit to piss the guy off next to us
>Revving engine, making gay faces at him, goading him into racing us
>He's 200_percent_mad_.jpg
>Advance green goes
>We turn left and he floors it straight ahead
>Guy in opposite left turn lane also goes at the same time
>The guy we pissed off crashes into the guy turning left
>Actually see it happen in the side view mirror
>lmao all the way to a strip mall in the ghetto part of town
>Last place in town that rents movies and video games, but people still go there because they give out free popcorn
>Grab a few bags and go down this one street that's full of welfare cases
>Sneak up on some thot whose head is glued to her phone
>Open the shotgun door and tap her on the ass with it
>She drops her phone and the light dies (screen probably broken)

>>9651147
that's the ativan talking you wouldn't do shit irl pussy

Showered for the first time in a month, I feel amazing.

>>9651136
>which pills specifically
benzos, if you can't get them then antihistamines

>>9651167
both if possible, benzos and hydroxyzine are a great combo

>>9651167
>>9651173
what's the best feeling klonopin dose with alc?

>>9651157
jesus, you sound like an asshole

>>9651189
I sually do 1-2mg, any more than that makes me black out

>>9651157
kill yourself faggot

>>9651089
Try not drinking in other people's residences.

>>9651163
hope you went with the full clean clothes experience

>>9651157
>another good drunk story
No, that was a story of children being pieces of shit

>>9651250
Yeah, it's my fault that some middle-aged man feels he needs to prove himself or that there's so many degenerates breathing the same air as me.

>>9651205
done and done

>>9651259
Enjoy the calm, try not to overdo it because it takes about 40 mins for the klonopin to hit

>>9651163
Personally a big trick that made my alcoholism really comfy. was 1) a clean as fuck house. 2) always nice clean clothes 3) normie food ready

This way you wake up clean, in a nice place where keys and wallets are not lost, and not have to kick over bottles, and you had food to give a bit of energy. Do it!

>>9651266
mm. I have 2mg of klonopin in me now. and 500ml of whisky,

>>9651258
You are literally retarded

>>9651282
Um try again sweetie :)

I'm just a legit high functioning sociopath

>>9651293
are you a boy or girl? I live in toronto

>>9651293
You're a legit manchild

>down a bottle of tekila
>still fine, a little bit dizzy
>go out and have some shots at a bar
>friends can confirm that I was only a little bit dizzy
>feel just fine myself

>drink 5 bottles of beer
>shitfaced and ready to die
How does that even work?

>>9651293
You're a legit cuckboi, how about I fuck your mouth?

>>9651323
It doesn't

>>9651293
>implying you still can't be retarded with a glorified high school diploma

>>9651352
>A top 10 university globally is a glorified highschool diploma
oh sweetie no...

>>9651360
bachelor of science is useless though. You gotta go for MA or PHD if you want a job that isn't starbucks.

The last time that I saw an ex friend.

>>9651293
>I'm just a legit high functioning sociopath

best in program in 4th year around tenured multiple book published profs, with a Cornell prof. Say fuck it all and start drinking. Well that ship has sailed now.

>>9651388
the thing that feels better than a paper on latour or gramsci is a pint of whisky and a fucking hamburger

>>9651378
Uhhh, not really no.

My first job out of school was $57k and in 2 years I moved up to $73k. Now 5 years out I'm up to $89k

>>9651397
normies can fuck right off forever.

>>9651282
>>9651352
>>9651378
>>9651385
Guys please stop responding to the bait

>>9650925
Alcohol is no more paleo than bread, dingus.

>>9651162
I'm 6'2 and built. I could be Chad if I so decided. Don't fuck with me you pathetic neckbeard.

>>9650998
>>9651089
Do you live with your parents?

>>9651360
>thinking where your fucking undergrad comes from matters in the least

>>9651417
>Thinking it doesn't

>>9651397
>My first job out of school was $57k and in 2 years I moved up to $73k. Now 5 years out I'm up to $89k
That's pretty cute, considering you're so damn proud of where you graduated. I'm making $108k less than 3 years out of school, and I don't even live in a massive urban liberal shithole metropolis. Cost of living is low here, and I have more money than I know what to do with, so I've started investing it.

Day of the rake is coming, leaf.

welp niggers, I'm drunk again, drove out of county to beat the alcohol on sunday restriction... fuckingggggggg

Who /teetotal/ here?

>>9651431
Hey, look guys! The flyover thinks his opinion matters!

no matter how much I drink, I don't get headaches or nausea in the morning, but I do become apathetic and anxious however.

Does anyone else have this sort of hangover?

>>9651444
>a canadian calling someone else a flyover

Yo, I can't fucking sleep because I keep thinking of alcohol. Should I drink some shots? Or is that a bad idea? It's 1:30 AM, I have university tomorrow and I really can't afford to stay awake for much longer

>about to run to the store to buy my usual 1.75l
>need food
What would al/ck/ get to fodder the booze?

>>9651498
Drink now and drink fast, it's the only way.

>>9651502
Eat toilet paper

>>9651502
Steak and broccoli.

And bread.

>>9651498
Bad idea, it'll ruin sleep quality and al/ck/s tend to go 'wew real living engaged' after a drink or two and things might escalate.

you'll be beter at uni sober with a decent nap than with booze in you

>>9651412
Yeah. I have schizophrenia and can't afford to live on my own on disability. So I pay my mom 500 dollars a month to let me live here. I tried a group home for the mentally ill and it was shit. No internet, no drinking, no TV before 4 PM and having to go to group therapy for 8 hours a day. And the pajeet living with me didn't know how to use a western toilet and got shit all over the walls and light switch.

>>9651512
I had steak and broccoli earlier, funny enough. I'm thinking Taco Bell because I'm a huge piece of garbage.
>>9651510
Okay thanks

>>9651502

>>9651520
>the pajeet living with me didn't know how to use a western toilet and got shit all over the walls and light switch.
you can't be serious

>>9651520
If I was your parents, I would have removed you from my household as soon as you were 18 if you had no potential for being anything other than a massive financial and emotional drain on the family. Them keeping you at home like a pet isn't helping anyone.

>>9651523
>I'm thinking Taco Bell because I'm a huge piece of garbage.
Well, at the very least, you're self-aware. Consider Whataburger or whatever your decent regional chain is instead.

>>9651533
I'm actually too far south for whataburger, holy shit I miss it... Thanks anyways, homie.

>>9651555
>too far south for whataburger
>has taco bell available

Where the hell are you? The Florida keys?

>1am, wake for no reason, spend next hour rolling from left to right moaning with pain so bad I can barely breathe
Starting to think this lifestyle is bad for me

>>9651533
Dumb breeders should've thought about that before creating schizos

Who wants to come and be my nurse? Free booze and bit of floor to live on in exchange for emptying my assorted chalices of mucus and effluvia, forcing me to eat occasionally and making some/any effort to assist me in my continued but diminishing efforts to not be dead. Apply with contact details and brief description of tits.

fuck I haven't been out of bed all day because I quit smoking
can't even stand up without feeling like shit

I'll take a shot for every post in this thread. I'm not even afraid.

>>9651694
>fuck I haven't been out of bed all day because I quit smoking
Have a cigar instead. It'll make you feel like you've quit smoking.

where did everyone go

so i've been sober 3 days now after about a 2 month streak of drinking. today i started feeling drunk without drinking alcohol. im drinking water and eating well. so what gives? why am I feeling this way? I can't find anything about it on google except for some rare condition which i seriously doubt I have.

>>9651907
Your blood pressure is probably just out of whack from your system adjusting to no booze. It'll wear off in a little while.

>Take depakote
>Side effect can be liver damage
>Get my blood drawn
>They find high enzyme levels
>Want to run another panel
>Have no way of telling whether its from booze or the medication without me going sober for three months, minimum
I don't think I'm gunna make it lads

>>9651907
it'll take at least a week before you feel normal

>>9651907
You're around the climax of withdrawals. You're not having the typical physical ones, but some weird psychological ones.
Count one week to reach some kind of normality, you'll still have PAWS for some time after that before actual normality.

>>9651157
the saddest part about this is people in this thread think any of this actually happened

>>9649146
Lol my doctor prescribed me this shit for the same reason..I was told to not drink while taking ...I literally dumped mine in the garbage, I'd rather have alcohol then some bullshit antidepressant suger pill

>>9651397
mmmk sweetie

>>9651926
Three months sober sounds like a great experiment.

>>9652294
Three months sober sounds like pure hell

>>9652294
sounds long

>>9652378
my record since being drinking age (13 years ago) is one month while in treatment, aside from that it's two weeks once or twice after some real real fucked up stuff happened

I've had a flu for almost two months that only seems to go away when I'm drunk. I'm starting to get worried about this being some weird medical condition where I've fucked up my liver or something.

Also I'm really close to buying a case of beer the moment the shops open because fuck this shit.

>>9652485
>I've had a flu for almost two months that only seems to go away when I'm drunk.

I doubt it goes away when you're drunk, you're just too drunk to focus on it. Though it is strange your body has recuperated in two months. Maybe your immune system has copped a battering.

>>9651533
You really hurt me. I hope you fucking know that. I didn't choose to be like this.

>>9652578
Being honest dude, if you have schizophrenia 4chan is not the place for you to be. I suggest you leave. People here will never stop trying to hurt you for no reason

Either that, or don't blog about your life, stick to board topics.

>>9652602
I've been here since before I got it. I have no other social outlet. 2006.

>>9652614
That doesn't mean anything whatsoever. Life changes its challenges change and you have to change too. Find a video game community or something. MMOs probably good for that

This probably isn't the right place for you anymore. Schizophrenics are deeply affected by needless negativity. I'm not schizo and I'm increasingly leaving this site behind because of the absolutely ceaseless negativity and polcancer. Was here 2006 also.

>>9647588

>>9652630
>I'm increasingly leaving this site behind because of the absolutely ceaseless negativity and polcancer
It has quite literally ruined this website. I don’t give a fuck about their views but you can’t enter a thread about alcoholism, cooking, movies, music, video games or fucking anything without it devolving into racebaiting bs. The only other imageboard site I’ve found that I like is too slow to have any meaningful conversation unfortunately.
I’d link it but it’s meant to be ‘female only’ and I know poltards and MRAs will jump on it.

I don’t give a fuck about my liver but I’ll quit drinking if it means I never again have to do a nasty ass slimy 2kg shit like I just did

>>9652690
>I’d link it but it’s meant to be ‘female only’ and I know poltards and MRAs will jump on it.

r9k regularly used to troll the fuck out of it.

>>9652677
>gotta catch em all

Comfy here,cups of tea lying in bed shit posting and playing mobile game.
Successfully drank less so no visible hangover and I have work tomorrow.

>>9652720
I remember. They weren’t actually good at trolling, they just posted obvious bait and got banned pretty much instantly, but I’m not looking to instigate that again.

>>9652690
ugh i need to find this so i can leave the chan behind forever

>started drinking at 10am
>took multiple day naps while gf caught up on Justified
>it is now 2:00 am and I don't know what the fuck to do/watch
Obviously drinking my vodka, but please help with suggestions, al/ck/.

>>9647646
Not sure why Smirnoff, a British vodka is so popular, I have had better but also much worse.
I buy the cheapest vodka which is palatable.

>>9652758
Nathan For You is one of the funniest shows on television in my opinion, 4th season is airing now

>>9652757
Chuck us a temporary email address and I’ll send it to you. I know it’s silly but this place is cancer and I’m not going to spread it

>>9652758
Watching Shameless. Pretty good show for people who are used to making bad choices.

>>9652766
>>9652773
Watched and watched. N4U is gold, all the way through and shameless is good the first time you watch it but gets ridiculously infuriating the second time you re-watch an episode. I empathize with lip, but Fiona is a huge cunt and as soon as Carl stopped being hard as fuck the show took a turn for the worst.

What is the most efficient way to drink in Canada? Getting paid this week but I want to keep money
Toronto here, get me out
>[spoiler] tags are not supported on /ck/.

>>9652758
watch Off The Air.

>>9652786
Not on Netflix you dingus

>>9652786
https://youtu.be/HaUz3Pzaffk

>>9652786
I apologize. I never said it had to be on Netflix, that's on me. Sorry.

>>9652786
Whats even the point if you're not on acid?

>>9652786
Yeah, nah.

>>9652784
It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia?

>>9652773
Shameless always feels like a show for normies who want to be "bad". I guiltily indulge in in every once in a while but I fucking hate anyone that actually gossips about the show.

>>9652814
Thanks.

>>9652809
Ty, gonna give it a try. I've already seen all of it, but it's almost 3am and I can't be choosy.

>>9652821
You're welcome.

>>9652828
Trailer Park Boys is a good series

>>9652841
Trailer Park Boys always feels like a show for normies who want to be "bad". I guiltily indulge in in every once in a while but I fucking hate anyone that actually gossips about the show.

>>9652841
>>9652843
TPB is alright but they’ve been doing the same formula for like 12 seasons now, got old pretty quick. Also with Lahey gone I have no interest in getting up to date on it

>>9652843
>show for normies who want to be "bad"
>gossips about trailerpark boys
lol wtf?

you sound like the fucking normie here

>>9652841
I religiously rewatch that show (seasons 1-8) every year. I'm actually in the middle of it right now but took a break. >>9652843
This guy is some fucking fag that tried to make my post into a copypasta, please ignore him just like his dad did.

>>9652847
There was another formulaic show about "country boys" who were really very intelligent and defeated all the smart assed city boys who tried to fuck with them. I know this is not a request board, but does that ring a bell with anyone?

>>9652855
>just like his dad did
Holy fuck boys

>>9652860
No, he's right. My Dad did ignore me. He was a reporter for a medium sized city newspaper and he always ran off in the middle of birthdays, holidays, anything, to take pictures of auto accidents and fires and shit like that. I'm sure the damage from that still shows and is part of why I drink.

>>9652856
I saw a scene from that posted on this site, and it ‘read’ like the writers were getting the characters to say the witty comebacks that they thought of hours after an argument that they wished they could have said in the moment.

>>9652875
That's the one. All the shit you think of later. What do they call it? The wit of the staircase. L'esprit de l'escalier. Of course the French have a name for it.

>>9652869
If this is actually the copypasta dude you just made that roast sad as fuck. I actually got out of bed and took a shot for you.
Feign an accident on your birthday and maybe it'll all work out, b0ss.

>>9652889
I'm not a depresso and I don't mind being roasted. When you're right, you're right. That's why I said thanks. Enjoy it.

>>9652887
Mmm, it wasn’t a badly written show, but the idea of it just being some vicarious self serving zinger fest for the writers left a bad taste in my mouth

>>9652894
Understood. I got that same feeling, although I enjoyed the big hulks actually saying it while they chugged beers and made side comments about hockey and laughed at the city folk. Do you remember the name of the damned thing? I want to watch Youtube clips.

>>9652773
pretty gay desu

>>9648073
drink rolling rock just like avgn

>>9652908
true. lots of gay stuff.

>>9652841
Bubbles was the best character

>>9652901
Letterkenny?

>>9652917
No bubbles is a mong who is funny, that letter his parents left him was funny as fook.
Julienne, J-Rock and Layhey are best characters.

>>9652924
Thanks.

>>9652927
Lahey is al/ck/'s spirit aminal

>>9652924
Thanks, you owe me a Coke.

I think Letterkenney is funny for drunks.

>>9652936
>haha look he's drinking alcohol like me
>the mans drunk haha just like me im drunk also haha
dumb as fuck

>>9652986
Wrong thread, friendo.

Only 71 posters. We usually top 100. All other board posters please sod off before this becomes just another shitstorm of babbies screaming at eachother, just another part of 4chins.

>>9652995
exactly the right thread actually

>>9653061
Yep, you're right. It was 100% wrong of me to argue with you, you were correct.

>>9653061
Oh my god, you're so right.

Christmas episode with Lahey's background story.
Oh Doge

>getting fat
>knee's fucked
>hair is thinning
How do I stop this other than /r/stopdrinking

>>9653090
r/stopcaring

Also eat vegetables and lose weight, calcium supplements and pray you don't have arthritis.

>>9653094
Even though the first half of that was sarcastic, thanks homie,

>Recurring dream where I'm weeping and begging my family for help happened again

>>9653115
>It wasn't a dream

>>9647918
weed for me is almost all the positive aspects of alcohol with almost none of the drawbacks, i wish it was way more available

>when you buy two different beer brands so that the cashier chick thinks you have company and doesn't give you the judgmental look

>>9653178
>when you think that works

Wish I had what it takes to just end my life right now

But here I am again, downing alcohol to hurt myself

>>9653178
>Not buying whatever the fuck you want from 7 different stores a week so you can pretend you don't do it every day

>>9653369
>not bottles of hard spirits everyday or every other day at the same place
idgaf they can judge me all they want it's my life

Is nationality of posters in these threads mostly USA? seems like it is

>>9653554
yropoor here

My roommate’s friend recently started working at the liquor store I frequent, when I went in the other day he mentioned that the other staff said I’m in there all the time. Wouldn’t mind too much ordinarily but I hate my roommate, don’t like him having ammo on me.

>>9653554
I’m Australian

>>9653554
UK here

>>9652602
fuck off dude, speak for yourself. There's a time and a place for everything, you don't need to attack someone for having problems beyond their control when this thread is full of assholes with problems all of their own making.

>>9652875
I think you're thinking of Letterkenny

>>9653554
what are you basing that assumption off of? the fact that we're all typing in english?

Canadian here

>>9652578
you're not defined by a mental illness

he hurt you because it's true

>>9653604
the fact that these threads are always busy during peak US times and dead otherwise

and 90% of terminology in posts is american

the "well known" posters or whatever you would call it ITT are americans

>>9653610
I dunno it seems like a pretty good mix to me. Smirnoff-bro is (or was) British, lots of people from continental europe, plenty of Canadians and Strayans, there was a dude from Ethiopia in the last thread. I mean I feel like there's a good chunk of posters from the states but probably not the majority

how is alcoholism real like nigga just put down the bottle, just close the liqour cabinet

LMAO!

>>9653642
exquisite meemeeing

Any of you guys ever get heart issues
I normally have 3 beers a day but had a six-pack on Saturday and Sunday, Sunday night I woke up and hr was about 105. No clue why.

Was sinus rythem though, so not an arrhthmia (checked with EKG)

>>9652856
The Dukes of Hazzard

>>9653800
Since going through withdrawals a few times I can’t even enjoy coffee anymore.

test

>>9653554
Laule, non. I'm a baguette.

>>9653800
>105
that's not to bad for hr

I'm on the end of a 7 day bender. Haven't drank today, don't think I could even get it down. My problem is SLUDGE coming out of my ass. That reeks of sugar/alcohol. It won't stop. I'm going to the bathroom every 10 minutes. Is there anything I can do?

I usually only binge for 3 days and the symptoms are way more manageable. I get black out drunk on an empty stomach all day. Maybe if I ate more this wouldn't happen?

>>9654533
Immodium

NEW:

>>9654971
>>9654971
>>9654971
>>9654971
>>9654971