/ck/ - Food & Cooking

>>6502166
>three starches
>no protein or veg

>>6502166
dear god the humanity!!

>>6502167
Thought that was some sort of larval sautee.
Somehow, tripling on carbs seems more disgusting.

>>6502166
>>6502166
These are supposed to be ironic right?

>slowpoke.jpg
>thejokegoingoveryourhead.jpg

Stupid dyke can't cook tre lolz.

>>6502167
>i don't understand protein

>>6502176
you can't post two pictures at the same time, fag

>>6502166
stop feeding him only carbs......hes already dead

my sides, literally

>>6502176
idk, is tumblr capable of irony?

>>6502190
>mashed potatoes and gravy
wheres the fucking meat? also that looks like chicken gravy or something. how can you have all those sides and no meat?

>>6502221
thats not fucking real, just
not

>>6502199
i think there's a piece of chicken to the left of the bread

>>6502261
oh god it looks like clay

>>6502166
That rice looks tasty but the rest is clearly lard

>>6502221
10/10 plating

>>6502221
Wtf

>>6502176
Poe's Law

>>6502221
would eat

>>6502221
>Bae must = behead after eating "@" bae.
what the fuck did i just read

I got a ton of girls like this on IG hahaha

(disclosure: the one that posted this I *would* fuck like there was no tomorrow)

>>6502166
>piece of toast
>microwave mashed potatoes
>microwave rice

Wifey material my ass.

>>6502353
the kraft dinner ruined it
would have been good with like roast potatoes ro something

I find this extremely depressing I am becoming sad looking at these Im out.

>>6502353
Compared to most I've seen, that's not terrible.

Also, semi-related, I hate that people don't buy fresh vegetables when they're in season/available. Frozen veggies should really only be used when they're out of season and can't be purchased fresh, yet people buy frozen out of habit and laziness. Cooked fresh broccoli is 10/10 but frozen is disgusting, weird texture, mostly stems.

>>6502478
>mfw cherries arent in season, and apparently neither braeburns.
muh pies.
and i agree, that dinner is the least shitty. though im pretty sure that chicken was frozen

>>6502478
there is nothing wrong with frozen vegetables

>>6502489

Sure there is. the process of freezing breaks the cell walls in the veggie. That results in a loss of juice and texture when they are thawed.

But that being said, I would rather have a veggie that was picked when it was ripe and then immediately frozen rather as opposed to "fresh" produce that was picked before it was ready and then sat around in a crate/truck/ship for who knows how long.

>>6502221
Is that noodles with cheddar cheese and cheetos?
Are the four baby carrots supposed to make this healthy?

I noticed in the dozens of these that I've seen, there's almost no meat (except that one with hot dogs and the fried chicken one).

Before anyone says this isn't wifey material, look at how dry and crusted that sauce has become. Look at how terribly that cheese is dispersed. Look at how there's way too much dried herb in the sauce. And finally, look at the wilted fucking basil. Just awful.

inb4 thai food

that basil is not sweet basil, and the flavor of fresh sweet basil does not stand up the prolonged cooking like thai basil does.

>>6502342
I think something is bleeding over from another dimension. That image and caption has made me question everything I thought I knew about reality.

>>6502500

Meat is expensive Anon

It reminds me of the pregnancy cravings / stealth stoner threads we had at 4am, only less interesting and smaller portions

>>6502500
lots of 'wifeys' are health conscious vegetarians

they skip that fattening meat and replace it with more kraft dinner

>>6502166
This woman is to carbs what Jamie Oliver is to olive oil

And then people look at me like I'm some sort of weirdo when I say I would dump a girl if she didn't know how to cook.

>>6502552
kek

>>6502190
At least he was the one who liked it and posted it. I hate the ones where the woman is bragging about the shitty food they just made.

>>6502600
You are a bit of a fool in my mind. But I recognize you can have a different sense of value.

>>6502630
Imagine coming home after a day at work (while your GF does nothing the whole day) and eating something like the pictures show in the thread.

But honestly I don't know who to blame for this. I just can't understand how someone can even dare to call "this" food.

>>6502166
a 5 year old could make that

>>6502630

>A fool

No he is right, cooking is a life skill it's like not knowing how to swim, ride a bike or read

And especially so if they're one of those faggots who proclaim they are proud to be a feminist who doesn't know how to cook

>>6502661

>GF staying at home

What economy are you living in?
Nobody has that luxury anymore everyone has to work

>>6502669
She was still in college. Luckily I had the luxury of having my own home.

>>6502534
Me too

>>6502669
Only reading is a necessary life skill. I learned to ride a bike, but I haven't ridden one in years. I know how to swim, but I sink in the water. Etc.

Knowing how to cook is important, and most people get the basic idea. As long as she isn't averse to learning how to do something and has a mind to be creative and care to make it work, I think it's fine enough. W

When people say "I''d dump a girl who didn't know how to cook." It conjures images of a woman coming home from her own job and spending an hour or two slaving in a kitchen while her husband sits on his ass and watches TV. It's pretty uncommon, when pushed for more, that people actually mean "I want her to know how to cook for herself, and therefore have associated personality traits the absence of being undesirable." Call me an arrogant asshole, but I'm not apt to give people that kind of credit by default.

>>6502696
If only one person in the relationship can cook, and you live together, then it'll be the same person cooking every night, despite both of them having to work. Thus, someone who knows how to cook would want that same quality in long term partner, would they not?

>>6502221
For some reason I don't quite understand what I'm seeing.

Also, why was an escape character used? "^", it clearly isn't a face and doesn't seem to mean anything, so it must be an escape character that got escaped itself? Is there more that I'm logically incapable of reading?

Too many questions.

>>6502712
Why respond if you're just going to reiterate what I said?

>>6502181
What the fuck are you even attempting to say?

Kill yourself faggot.

>>6502696

Fine you can have bikes, I'll even give you swimming

Cooking IS a life skill, not up for debate you eat everyday

>When people say "I''d dump a girl who didn't know how to cook." It conjures images of a woman coming home from her own job and spending an hour or two slaving in a kitchen while her husband sits on his ass and watches TV

I thought I clicked /ck/ not tumblr, why are you trying to use emotions and feelings to win?
That has nothing to do with whether cooking is a life skill or not

>>6502500
Because the average #wifeymaterial girl can make Kraft macaroni or mashed potatoes, but doesn't know what brining a chicken means, or how to cook a steak properly.

>>6502744
If you can't manage basic reading comprehension, we might as well just stop. Nothing worth the time will come from this.

>Cooking IS a life skill, not up for debate you eat everyday
Depends on what you consider COOKING as a SKILL to MEAN. See, I can EMPHASIZE too.

Like I said, as long as someone is capable of preparing food, this is where I set the bar. If someone has the will, awareness, and capacity to use prior experiences and creativity to prepare food for themselves or others, that's what I consider knowing how to cook.

>I thought I clicked /ck/ not tumblr, why are you trying to use emotions and feelings to win?
Whine all you want bud, it happens. And it's a decently common expectation, or at least a fantasy.

>That has nothing to do with whether cooking is a life skill or not
When you parse a post, you mustn't break it up into to discrete pieces and expect them to be standalone. You have to weigh it all together to derive its greater meaning and maintain a sense of context.

Please put in effort. I'm cooking as we speak, I'll be back a bit later.

>>6502552
Yeah right. Most are white trash and not vegetarian. Cooking meat requires a bit more skill than boiling and reheating stuff. Nevermind the fact that cooking meat is often icky. That's why steaks feature often in these threads. Just throw them on and brown both sides.

>>6502478

lol work got crazy and i didn't post some of the better ones that popped up in my feed. Here's one of em.

>>6502696
>When people say "I''d dump a girl who didn't know how to cook." It conjures images of a woman coming home from her own job and spending an hour or two slaving in a kitchen
Not at all. She should be able to cook as often and as much as I do. And you only need to "slave" for half an hour unless it's a special meal. I do everyday. With two people you'd only need to every other day.

>>6502874
I'm the kind of person who cooks meals from scratch in ~20 minutes maximum, and most of that isn't even spent around the stove. It's waiting for liquids to boil off or things to cook trough.

Chances are it wouldn't work very well with anyone who put a lot of value in moods, food, or the act of eating in general. But that's just me, point remains I've seen situations like what I mentioned. I'm not all "SJW" about things, but that kind of expectation and gender roles does irritate me to watch. If you're so hungry, quit bitching and go cook something yourself.

>>6502950
value in foods*

Quite literally everything I've posted today has been packed full of typos. I don't know what makes this happen, but I do wish it would stop. On an unrelated note, captcha asked me to select cupcakes. I selected all booze instead. Worked fine.

>>6502696
I see where you're getting at and I understand that, but we are on a cooking board and what I said by dumping a girl who doesn't know how to cook meant that I wouldn't tolerate #wifeymaterial mentioned in this thread. Usually I do the cooking and honestly I don't like people to get into my kitchen but that is another story. I expect from my GF to know how to make something a bit more complex than just mac & cheese. I'm not ungrateful and that entitled to think that I have the right to demand a high quality meal every day from someone. If you're living with your gf/bf you have to share duties, and cooking is one of them.

tl;dr; what you said :
>I want her to know how to cook for herself, and therefore have associated personality traits the absence of being undesirable

>>6503078
yeah my brother has/had a roommate
nigga hardly ever cooked and was barely adept at handling the stove. if he was any worse their apartment would be awash in fast food bags and wrappers. it already was but it would be even worse.
nigga knocked up his girlfriend of 4 months and bailed on the apartment we were going to get. he just turned 21 4 months ago lel

>>6502166
If someone served me this I would break up with them on the spot.

>>6502525
that poor basil

shit could start a forest fire god damn

the only time ive ever served two starches at once is when ive been too poor for meat and veggies, near the end of the month, and figured two smaller portions of different starches was better than a heaping portion of one starch

any time it happens im disappointed in myself

>>6502342
>>6502715
They were tagging someone but the person removed the identity of the person tagged.

>>6502342
it's bix nood, don't try to get it, they don't get it themselves.

>>6503946
I honestly don't know a single thing that's on that plate.

It looks like...a block of potatoe? Toast? Dry bread? Crouton? And then, like...deep fried mini corn? And the thing on the bottom looks like raw chicken, I don't even know.

Also, is that butter in hot water? Are the America memes true?

>>6503974
Could be tea with Splenda sweetener. Roommate uses it heavily and I absolutely hate the shit when I tried it. It foams up pretty much like that, has a horrible chemical taste. As for the food, looks like cornbread (long square thing), johnny cakes (which is just cornbread batter, leftovers from making the loaf I suppose, fried in a skillet with oil) and fried tofu or some shit? Don't ask me what the peanut butter poo thing is though, looks too smooth to be hummus. Maybe some sort of nasty carrot puree? It does say its "vegetarian"

I honestly hope this was a joke

>>6504001
lol. LOL. I haven't the slightest why, but this strikes me as hilarious beyond compare. Looking at it, these tiny little bits arranged on a massive plate. Just lol.

There are better ways to run a calorie deficit though.

>>6504001
Is that a paper plate?

>>6502353
she done good enuff

>>6502478
They're so much easier and you literally can't get more fresh unless you grow it yourself. They do taste different, but I don't think it's a bad different.

>mostly stems
Somebody doesn't shop at costco.

>>6502715
"^" is what's left of an "A" after the image was edited to remove the identity.

>>6504062
FUCK BROCCOLI!

>>6504110
FUCK YOU!

>>6504131
Fuck everything.

>>6504133
Fuck everybody! Fuck is the word!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Id4fq_IQSAY

>>6504133
me agree

>>6504062
my time is worth a lot to me. the loss in time from preparing the fresh ones more than makes up the difference in opportunity cost

>>6504153
Well, you can always eat them raw

>>6504153
>loss in time from preparing the fresh ones
Wut

Are you one of those fags that have too hardcore javascript sessions to prepare food?

>>6504159
I'm not them, but I get more intense. I go 3+ days without food in one contiguous hardcore batch scripting session. No sleep. No food. Only water if I have it next to me. Stimulants if next to me as well, and if necessary.

Screw any of that ease and efficiency of OOP, or any of that low level control of C. When I need something done, I get it done, and I get it done in batch.

>>6504153
If your time is worth a lot to you, why are you wasting it preparing fresh vegetables?

>>6504062
Wait. That thing on the right really exists?

>>6504169
It takes me more time to steam or cook frozen vegetables because they need to defrost first.

>>6504175
you're not supposed to defrost them first, that makes them shitty.

>>6504177
I meant, frozen broccoli just takes longer to steam than fresh one. And you have to wait until the water boils anyway, that's enough time to wash and chop it.

>>6503974
It's a block of tofu, cubes of smaller tofu, fried something, with some kind of sauce.

>>6503993
Do these people say #gfmaterial and wifeymaterial because they're not gfs or wives?
What is this, some sort of advertising?

>>6502734
he's saying rice is protein, though he should know you meant meat if he wasnt autistic

>>6503974
Looks like fried tofu, bread and sauce. Looks like thousand island.

>>6504183
Barely, it's blanched and more or less ready to eat once it's defrosted. Unless you're one of those weirdos who likes mushy soft broccoli.

You could be doing the rest of your meal while the water boils. I don't think you have a handle on this time management thing.

>>6504199
You frankly don't even have to chop broccoli, just break pieces off. It takes like 5 seconds.

>>6504189
some of them are gfs looking to be upgraded, some of them are single/single moms looking for a hubby. some of them are wives bragging about how good wives they are.

all of them are ratchet

>>6504200
Okay.

>>6502478
>>6504062
Broccoli stems are much better than florets; florets always have a mealy texture no matter how they're cooked.

Balanced meal?
Rosemary chicken & Mushroom Fettuccine with Spinach Salad

Island Pork Tenderloin Salad

She's lucky she married me

>>6504191
7g/100g.

Hardly any. And thats for almost 400 calories.

>>6504233

I had red onion in my salad yesterday. Also anchovy, chickpea, hardboiled egg, tomato, two kinds of lettuce, and feta. And a wheat wrap with an entire can of tuna. Gains salad and sandwich combo.

>eating pasta

Otherwise nice meal. Rip up dem herbs and spread it evenly brah.

>>6504236
>>6504233
What the hell is shit shit?

>>6504506

>>6502166
>that preheated looking shit that I refuse to call "Spanish rice"
>Carbs, carbs, and carbs
>Gonzalez

This plate is a disgrace to every hispanic wifey in the world.

>>6504506
10/10
Nice 1 m8

>>6504233
>>6504236
where'd you get those plates?

>>6502450
I would kill myself if I married a woman who fed me this

>>6502839
>>6502839
>>6502839

YOU ARE A FAGGOT STOP POSTING HERE

>>6502498
>"fresh" produce that was picked before it was ready and then sat around in a crate/truck/ship for who knows how long.
this
the supermarkets near here are never trully fresh, it disappoints me so much
especially broccoli
so sometimes frozen ends up being the solution

>>6502748
You cook a steak properly by getting a GOOD cut of meat, waving it briefly in the direction of a fire, and then slapping it, still mooing and bleeding down on a plate. Optionally garnish with a tiny bit of salt and pepper. how is that hard?

>>6504575
With all due respect m'kind sir, you forgot to capitalize Properly. I give you a 2 tips out of 10, it's the most tips I can give.

>>6503974
ALLOW ME TO SETTLE THIS:

That is walmart brand iced tea served only partially chilled, (the foam on the top happens every time) cornbread, no-name brand tater tots, walmart apple sauce, and fried tofu.

I wonder sometimes if this girl is even trying. Like at least most of the things posted here seem like they want to try.... but this chick.... holy shit.

>>6504575
>how is that hard?

From what I've seen here, very. The main issues are people being unable to recognize a good cut of meat, and fucking up the temperature while cooking. As for the meat--it's either too lean, the wrong cut, or it's not even a "steak" at all, but something like stew cubes or stir-fry meat. Seriously, I don't know how you can confuse "steak" with "thin sliced beef for stir fry" but it's happened here more than once. As for the temperature, it's either the pan is not hot enough and the sear is miserable, or the opposite and it's smoking and burnt.

>>6504561
#struggleplate
Fucking niggers man, nobody does comedy like them.

>>6502342
The ratchet realm of the internet

>>6502342
I think that's the syntax of a functional programming language, though i can't recall which one
go ask /g/

>>6502166
carb overoad

>>6504561
>struggleplate

So why was it ever a thing that woman were the ones who cook where it is shown that men are proven to be better cooks overall?

>>6505394

Because historically the men were working while the women stayed home and took care of the household. the fact that the man was better at it didn't matter because he had more important things to do.

>>6505394
Men are better cooks because they don't have kids running around under their feet all day. Women try to throw something together quickly because they don't have a lot of time to devote in the kitchen because they're doing laundry, feeding the kids, cleaning the kids, playing with the kids, cleaning the house, doing the dishes, etc. Get it? Men would be shit cooks too if that was their home life while Wifey works making all the money.

>>6505415
I highly doubt it you apologist.

>>6505422
Men couldn't maintain a household that is filled with babies and toddlers. It's been proven that they cannot multitask as well as women. Who usually ends up leaving babies in hot cars? Dads.

>>6505415
Found the sjw

>>6505429
>It's been proven that they cannot multitask as well as women.
and yet they are still shit at cooking

>>6505429
>source

>>6505415
I'd honestly argue that it's more of a cultural shift. Most men I've met that can't cook come from a traditional two parent household with a house wife.

Most women I've met who can't cook come from a household where they were told they could be anything. Most of the women who are good cooks tend to be ones who were taught life skills were important.

>tfw college age women get impressed by being able to boil water

I just do not understand where this is going.

>>6505443
http://www.biomedcentral.com/2050-7283/1/18
http://www.bbc.com/news/science-environment-24645100
http://www.livescience.com/40740-women-better-at-multitasking.html

>>6505429
BULLSHIT
BULLSHIT
i don't even give a fuck i'm using my trip for this one
the human mind can handle about seven things at once, plus or minus two. sex has nothing to do with it.

check
your
privilege
cunt

>>6505450
I impressed people with being able to put dried pasta in boiling water and warm up canned tomato sauce.

>>6505455
Actually, you can only give attention to one thing at a time. You can have other things on the "fringe" of your attention, but you can only completely focus on one thing at a time.

>>6505458
nope
wrong

and all of those studies do not count variance in TYPE of task.

>>6505462
Alright, source your claim that we can multi task on 7 things.

And if you ask me to source my claim, Ima have to stop you right there, because you made your argument first. Ill be waiting bruh, but something tells me you wont find any info, because that's bullshit.

>>6505466
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Magical_Number_Seven,_Plus_or_Minus_Two
yes, i'm sourcing cognitive psychology, deal with it. those other studies didn't have MRIs or PETs either so eat a big fat dick hombre

>>6505466
i highly recommend this book on memory

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Moonwalking_with_Einstein

for an intro to psychology
as you obviously need it

>>6505471
That says you can hold 7 objects in working memory, not that you can give all 7 absolute focus. What you're saying is that a human can solve 7, plus or minus 2, equations simultaneously. Cant happen amigo, you can only focus on one thing, but you might be ably to be dimly aware of the other 6 or so at the same time.

>>6502696
>When people say "I''d dump a girl who didn't know how to cook." It conjures images of a woman coming home from her own job and spending an hour or two slaving in a kitchen while her husband sits on his ass and watches TV.

lolwatwait... That's just in your head.

>>6505482
BULLSHIT
you can't even fucking cite what your theories are called
it's called central and peripheral working memory

and if you knew dick about cognitive psychology
you'd know that shit is OUTDATED AS FUCK

http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/24867488

you never cited your sources so i did it for you BITCH; and, while YOU may only be able to solve five equations at once, some people can do NINE, but as a general rule, it's seven, plus or minus two. if you're so narrow minded YOU can only focus on ONE thing at once and everything else is just peripheral, well, i feel sorry for you.

>>6505517
I'm a different poster.

Yeah, sorry anon, you didn't source much of anything. Cognitive psychology right now is a very conflicting and somewhat stagnant field at the moment, for a few reasons.

Personally, I couldn't do more than two or three "equations", whatever you mean by that word, in my head at once. And to do so would be require rapidly switching back and forth, potentially misloading specifics via of cognitive load, or just losing sight of the whole. I doubt you can do much different.

Also, I don't personally really agree with a division between peripheral and central working memory. The distinction is valid in some senses, but faulty in others. It needs to be refined if it to exist, because it certainly doesn't reflect properly for me.

Didn't read the rest of the conversation. Saw your post while scrolling and figured I'd say "what and why, anon."

>>6502166

>carbs, with sugar on top, with a side of carbs, and some extra other carbs
>the end

im on fucking test and trenbolone and that dish would still induce depression

>>6505597
Why are you on testosterone, and what's your age?

You probably don't care to get into it, but I am to be wary of doctor's and their competence in general. I hope you looked into all hormonal angles that could drive down testosterone.

>>6505566
Face it. He blew you the fuck out.

>>6505003
"must ="
prolog?

I guess 'behead' and 'eating' are keywords, and bae is a variable

>>6502166
the person in OP better be a marathon runner or pro cyclist to be eating nothing but starches like that

>>6504189
Its peacocking. Most of the things a woman does is peacocking.

>>6502221
-0/10

>>6504233
not bad, pasta is pleb tier food though

>>6505636
Like I said, I'm a different poster. I've wanted to talk cognitive psychology on /ck/ for quite a while and half brought it up a few times, sometimes food and cooking related, sometimes not. While this guy seems to have the will to endeavor into the topic, he's getting way too hostile and self assured when what he's saying isn't really logical or even all that backed by anything.

The last time I cared to talk about topics like this, it was with the visual system and how it processes with a reliance on tracing edges of broad macro shapes and adding tone and gradient information. This conversation roughly starts here:
>>6498715

I was a lot more open minded at the time and fairly high on cocoa bean. I'm trashed at best presently, but you'll notice a parallel between the other poster and the guy you're defending. I'd like to feel like he just has a different take on things than me, but it just seems like his mindset is in the same vein just with a bit more depth behind it. People are real boring when it comes to this topic, and I'm real jaded as a result. I've been studying this shit since I was 12 or so, and while I realize this isn't quite the place, it'd be nice if pulling it to the surface from existing topics yielded worthwhile results for once.

>>6504506
reminds me of this pic

>>6505676
i hate you

>>6505676
Lol. It does. Uncanny similarity.

>>6505676
god damn it had been like 5 years and i had almost wiped that imageset from my memory... fuck you

>>6505701
What is it? Some kind of cake?

>>6505708
you could say that....

>>6505680
>>6505689
>>6505701
What did I miss?

>>6505727
At this point, at least as far as consistency.

>>6504110
Average Finnish household?

>>6504236
>drizzle dots his own plate

Whats the point?

>>6505422
>>6505430
>>6505437

WOMEN ARE INFERIOR!!! ONLY MEN CAN COOK! SPREAD THE WORD!!! LETS GET TOGETHER AND MAKE SOME BACON MONSTROSITIES, SHALL WE NOT, FINE GENTLEMEN? *tip*

>>6505671

you're a cool guy, guy

>>6504506
oh sweet fuck

>>6504561
What is the orange thing?

>>6505836
Lobster tail.

>>6505838
...no. What is it really?

>>6505857
Lobster tail

>>6505857
Lobster tail.

>>6505566
sorry anon :/

>>6505671
srsly read that book i recomended, moonwalking with einstein. while it isn't a complete comprehensive psychology course, it'll help get you started. and it'll teach you method of loci, which i use to study (it's a method of memorization where you put stuff in your long-term memory instantly. it's a way of coding information and placing it spatially so that it stays there. i would love to talk about it if you want to learn, as ANY PERSON CAN DO IT. not just geniuses are memory champs, they just use loci), and that's a definite plus.

i also recommend an entry-level psychology course. you can go to the sticky on /sci/ and prolly get a few text book pdfs and lesson plans. you have to learn a shitload of disorders and whatnot to really get a hang of it. but then you have to dabble into chemistry to REALLY understand it, neurochemistry specifically. and that's why i'm a chem/medical major lol

(sorry to be so hostile man i'm just that way, if you've ever seen me post on different boards)

>>6502238
its all fake dude

>>6503993
>calling that a hoagie

god fucking dammit i'm mad

>>6504110
FUCK BROCCOREE

>>6502166
oh god three carbs

in the thumbnail i thought the toast was a giant tendie.

>>6502950
Expecting someone to know how to cook when you also know how to cook is not a gender role. It's the opposite of a gender role.

>tfw wifey is even worse than these bitches with their horrible dinners and doesn't make anything at all. Hell something horrible is better than no dinner at all.

>>6506480
>muh carb on carbs

That dish probably has a better nutrient balance than steak and veg.

>>6504584
I thought they were tater tots too but I think they're tofu cubes. Same as the tofu slab.

>walmart apple sauce
Yeah that seems likely. That pink-orange color. It's not orange enough to be thousand island.

>>6504589
>Seriously, I don't know how you can confuse "steak" with "thin sliced beef for stir fry"
Steak-umms probably confuse people.

>>6502166

>>6503946

>vegetarian
>load the plate with starch

I'm getting really tired of these people.

>>6503993

That's closer to a dagwood than a hoagie.

>>6505857

It's a lobster tail dammit.

The point being that she took a great thing like that and drowned it in a pile of shit.

>>6506905
the 4/10 stuff is perhaps even sadder than the -0/10

>>6504506

>>6506905
That one's alright. Nothing I'd post on the Internet, but if I were tired and lazy and just wanted some of everything I'd make something like this.

Fuck that melted American though. Why is there always fucking melted American.

>>6505807
Spotted the butthurt femshit.

White trash women are inferior, hence the laughter and disgust ITT.

>>6506961
It's a lot less expensive than real cheese. I can get ten slices of real stuff for about $2.30 or a block of forty slices of American for less than that.

I could buy a block of real cheese, of course, but then I'd need to invest in a cheese slicer. There's also the possibility that one of my roommates might tear blocks of it off with his bear hands since he's the sort of guy to drink right from the water jug.

>>6502525
There are a lot of technical errors here, yes, but why are you so upset?

>>6504001
what even is this shit
is that a tiny fucking piece of tomato

>>6506905
nothing in that picture even requires boiled water....

I'm 32, so I kind of missed the "taking photos of food" phase when I was starting out.

I'll be honest with y'all, I was pretty terrible when I started out. I mean, I burned spaghetti and rice several times. That bad.

What I'm saying is, I would never hate on anyone for trying. It's just sad to see they are so delusional.

At least I knew my cooking sucked.

>>6507171
get out of here don't apologize for these monstrous kraft dinners, i mean shit aren't we all still learning? (but these pics are stuff i cooked when i was like 11 and didn't know the microwave wasn't a valid heat source)

>>6504561
>all purchased with EBT

>>6505429
>Who usually ends up leaving babies in hot cars? Dads.

Yeah, no. Its women who do that, and they do it more with dogs, too. Even female cops.

>>6505429
and yet the name of the professional cooking game is multitasking
I wonder how that works

>>6505429
When I was 4 my mother told me she was going grocery shopping and left me waiting in the car for 3+ hours. She was visiting what would become her boyfriend later on. She left me hanging or waiting at all ages from that point on, and to this day (in my twenties), if I get myself involved in her shit, this remains.

My father never bullshitted around. There are certainly some braindead dads out there, but women are much more apt to be mentally absent or selfish. They're very good at justification.

Freud was right in an inverse sense though. Much of what I avoid in potential partners directly stems from experiences with my parents. I'm fairly drawn to people who are capable of a strong sense of shame and self disgust, but in a sense where they actually learned from it. Only they have a sense of awareness about the world and themselves.

>>6507397
She purposely left you behind because you were burdening her personal life.

Dads that leave kids in hot cars on accident usually happen because of a change in schedule. Mom is sick or called into work on her day off and asks dad to drop child off at daycare before he goes to work. Since this isn't his usual routine, he straps kid in, starts driving, forgets about the child sleeping in his backseat and heads to work. It isn't until much later when mom calls asking if he can pick the kid up as well and he's like OH FUCK.

>>6504206
And the pics are invariably shit. Knowing how to use a microwave doesn't make you a great cook.

>>6502866
>leftover Chinese takeout
>#wifeymaterial

Yeah, no.

>>6504561
Looks like somebody already ate it.

>>6407397
>my mother did this so all women must!
>freud
No and no.

>>6507413
I read that story on nosleep, too, friend.

>>6505394
Pic related

>>6504561
>waterxlemons
Read that wrong at first and now I feel like a racist bastard.

Also #struggleplate

>>6507447
I never said all women did anything.
I bet you're the kind of person who'd say "Freudian psychology has been thoroughly debunked."

Why do people have to be like this. Is it really so hard to not confuse your own assumptions with something someone actually said? I realized awful things were to come the moment we first played telephone.

>>6505415
>because they're doing laundry, feeding the kids, cleaning the kids, playing with the kids, cleaning the house, doing the dishes, etc. Get it?
My mom is a good cook though

>>6504561

That actually looks really fucking good.

>>6507455
Why is it every time I see "bae" I want to punch a wall?

Wtf is a bae? the cool word for babe or what?

>>6507470
Your box gotta be trash
>Your box
>box
lol

>>6507466
Bae = "before anyone else". Your bf/gf, best friend, etc.

It's SUPPOSED to be cool, but it's really just lame as shit.

>>6507470
>sarah_improved
Yeah, that's just an opinion.

WTF is that shit, anyway? It's unidentifiable.

>>6507482
Nothing says "I love you" like one bite of scrambled eggs and meat burnt beyond the point of comprehension.

>>6507495
That's not steak. It may have been at one point, but not any more.

>>6507495
oh sweet fuck that steak.

its too late.

>>6505394
Men: concentrate on the food and the food alone

Women: concentrate on 10 things at once

>>6502525

I can imagine the slaphappy guy from South Park saying all of this before slapping his sorry wife.

>>6506972
>but then I'd need to invest in a cheese slicer.
Or a knife. The slices don't need to be perfect.

>>6507465
>I was with it once but then they changed what 'it' was

>>6507476
it doesn't really mean that, it's a just lazy ghetto slur

>>6507495
im fina Bash?

>>6507495

> and I'm single

Gee whiz

I wonder what could be the reason

>>6507598
I think it's ghetto speak for "going to smash" as in eat it all.

>>6507533
>>6507543
>>6507495
Many people like their steak well done and it's not that hard to burn your steak if you're not a good cook. But how the hell do you end up with black fucking string beans that look boiled.

The worst examples of food are always takes on meat, starch, veg. They look almost completely devoid of flavour.

>>6507604
fucking random capitalization

>>6507605
Nobody is offended by the unmelted kraft single over the baked potato with bacon bits sprinkled over it?

>>6504155
Unexpected Xboct

>>6507017
...the bacon does

>>6507614
It's arguably the most edible thing on that plate.

>>6507658
you're telling me you boil bacon anon?

>>6507495
What
>>6507482
the fuck
>>6507470
is with
>>6507455
the melted
>>6506905
american
>>6502221
cheese?

If your dish needs soft cheese on top of it that much, (which only soup and tacos do, with anything else you'd cook the cheese in,) buy a block and fucking grate it yourself instead of putting one sad waxy precliced square on top. It takes 40 seconds.

>>6507376
exactly

fat ebt nigs love lobster so much they would have spurred the lobby market in 2007 runescape

>>6507856
It also dirties your cheese grater, or as mitch hedberg calls them, sponge ruiners. That 40 seconds of getting it out, opening it, grating it, closing the cheese, putting it back and shit then later having to wash ANOTHER utensil?
I'd rather just go without cheese, I hate the taste of Americna.

>>6505429
My Mom would leave me in the car with our dog for up to an hour on hot days, and this was before cell phones, so I can no way of getting into contact with her as the inside of the car became a slow cooker while I slowly began to lose my mind due to the extreme heat.

She also can't cook.

>>6507495
Just think of all the starving people in the world who go without food as our local retards turn their precious foodstuffs into hockey pucks and lawn ornaments.

>>6506607
>bigbait.gif

>>6507888

Christ bro, how lazy are you?

As for the grater, just toss it in the dishwasher. Why anyone would use a sponge on one is beyond comprehension.

>>6507923
>Everyone owns a dishwasher

Fuck you, cunt.

>>6507948
Jesus christ, who the fuck eats 7 hot dogs for dinner?

>>6507954

yeah

you need at least the whole 12 pack to fill yourself

>>6507923

>toss it in the dishwasher

I'd have to spend like $2000/month for a 1br with a dishwasher, not even exaggerating.

>>6505737

>>6507948
>ketchup on waffles

sick dinner indeed

>>6507948
god bless man

>>6507943
>>6507966
I don't have a dishwasher either, but it's not hard to clean dairy off things. Use the sponge in one direction.

>>6508029

>>6507966

What's stopping you from installing your own dishwasher? They're not very expensive.

>>6507993
They're potato waffles. Basically fries but in that shape.

>>6508050

Space? Transience? Lease obligation? Building code?

You can do whatever you want out in Bumbledick, IN, but in a major city, a dishwasher is not a given. I live in a Jersey City apartment, in an old brownstone. The kitchen is small enough as it is, but if I took out the trash compactor that the place came with and installed one of those ~$400 slim-line 18" dishwashers (not enough space for a normal one), I'd have to restore the original trash compactor when I move out. Where would I store that shit in the meantime? Not to mention to the hot water line to the sink is a welded joint, so I would TECHNICALLY need a building department permit to renovate. All that's contingent upon my landlord approving it to begin with.

It's just not feasible for some situations

>>6508075
>Space? Transience? Lease obligation? Building code?

All of those seem easily surmountable, but speculating doesn't really help. If the previous poster can explain why he doesn't have a dishwasher then we we can help fix it.

To use your example:
>>I'd have to restore the original trash compactor when I move out.
What's the problem with that? Surely a trash dishwasher is more useful than the compactor, so it seems like a logical change to make.

>>welded joint
I think you mean soldered.

>>technically need a building permit
And you shouldn't jaywalk or drink underage either. Are you really serious about the theoretical need for a permit stopping you?

>>landlord approving it
Why would you even ask your landlord in the first place? It's easier to ask forgiveness than permission. Take out the compactor, put it in the corner of a closet. Install dishwasher. When you move out, reverse the process and sell the dishwasher. That is if the landlord even notices.

>>6508075
A friend of mine bought his mother a mini countertop dishwasher. She loves it. It does take up a bit of counter space but she's happy with it either way. The cancer has taken a lot of her energy and strength to stand over a sink and wash dishes by hand.

>>6508104
>Surely a trash dishwasher is more useful than the compactor
Absolutely, but I'd still have to replace it when I move out, so I'd have to keep the trash compactor around in my tiny apartment. There's seriously not place for it.

>I think you mean soldered.
I do

>Are you really serious about the theoretical need for a permit stopping you?
The lack of one will stop any reputable contractor, and I'm not fucking with a soldered joint with no valve under the sink. If something goes wrong, I'd have to call the super to shut off the main that feeds my apartment. No idea where it is, but I imagine it's behind one of the thousand locked doors.

>It's easier to ask forgiveness than permission
Unless they'd rather evict me and get someone in who won't fuck with their shit and make lease-breaching alterations.

>Take out the compactor, put it in the corner of a closet
That's cute. You're seriously overestimating my living space.


What is it you want me to admit here? That it's theoretically possible for me to get a dishwasher? It is, but it's more effort than just washing my dishes by hand. It's really not a big deal if you can see your teevee from your kitchen.


>>6508139
I've thought about that, but I would still have to put a t-joint in the hot water supply. I doubt I'll ever hate doing dishes enough to get one, though.

>>6504233
pasta needs some sauce, other than that looks fuggin gud

>>6508166
Is that a geisha or a mime?

>>6507880
>tfw fished lobbies all day erryday on RS in 07

Good times.

>>6508181
mime can't talk, dummy

>>6508374
You have to squint to tell the muffin apart from the steak.

>>6508513
Maybe the steak was charred rare... with a plasma torch.

>>6508374
From the thumbnail I thought this was black cuckold porn. But no, it's just two women that think burning = cooking.

>>6506905
Not gonna lie; if I was a kid (or at least ate like one) I'd be all over that shit.

Whatcha think, /ck/?

>>6507449

Hah, we need ads like this again.

>>6508776

It doesn't look that bad, but I imagine it would be bland.

>>6508776
Have you ever seen the other shit in this thread? This isn't even close to as bad as them.

>>6504155
Is that...xboct?
>tfw dota nostalgia

>>6506905
Is that a fucking microwave pancake? I hate those things.

>>6508869
I'm pretty sure that's microwave everything.

>>6507447
>writing out the post number

>>6507555

>>6507455
What the fuck is with the #struggleshit? I'm not even certain why but it really pisses me off.

>>6507958
kill*

>>6508970
#thestuggle

>>6508776
I didn't know it was possible to make steak hot pink, but otherwise it looks okay. Just bland. Let's just be thankful she didn't melt a square of American on something.

Here's a /ck/ original

>>6506071
Short-Term Memory ≠ Multi-tasking you retard. Any kid who took a highscool psych class could tell you that miller's law has nothing to do with a human's ability to process two different tasks simultaneously. Encoding a string of seven numbers to your short term isn't considered multitasking becuase each number isn't a seperate "task". Encoding two strings of numbers simultaneously is multitasking.

>>6507482
that's not even real kraft slices, that's like some low fat version shit.

>>6507397
> I'm fairly drawn to people who are capable of a strong sense of shame and self disgust, but in a sense where they actually learned from it.
I love this.

>stay at gf's
>wake up and cook us shakashuka
>she says she'll cook dinner and start now
>pulls chuck of silverside out of the freezer
>leaves it on bench to defrost for the next 6 hours
>rapid boils it for two
>she serves it in fist sized chunks
>with packet mix instant mashed potato
>figure I can deal with it, free food and all
>ask where the mustard is or if she made a white sauce
>"White sauce is for lasagne and mustard is gross Anon. Silverside doesn't need sauce anyway. There's salt and pepper if you want."
>leave
>turn off phone for three days
>eat scotch instead

I should have got a photo, you guys would have loved it.

>>6508991
do you have the web'm?

>>6505429
My mother smoked pot while she rocked my crib as an infant, it was the 'safest' drug she could do around me.
The best meal she could make was anything deep fried. She slept 19 hours on average a day.
My father was the head chef for three different places at once. I'd know Dad was home because the house would be clean.

Women are trash and multitasking is a myth. Switching back and forth between multiple tasks is not multitasking. It's a sign of ADHD.

>>6509018
There's a web'umm? What the fuck am I doing with this cheap imitation?

>>6508301
women can't talk either

I've been intermittenly posting a lot of the pics here... please support me.

bestofwifeymaterial.tumblr.com

>>6508527
that muffin was also baked with that torch too, huh?

>>6502622
He better fucking like it and post it or he's gonna get his ass kicked.

>>6509264
Three microwaves and fruit from a bag.

>>6509310
Are you sure those grapes came from a bag and not a giant nose?

>>6509313
Well, judging from the mucous, it very well could be...

>Wife: Hubby, what kind of meal do you want?

>Him: Just carb my shit up.

Are all of them real american ?

I mean like REAL MURRican

Even the worst wifey shit always looks like what would set me right if I was shithoused. Wifies are just doing their best to supply their men with drunk food and we make fun of them on an Indonesian cooking website.

I have never felt such sympathy for strangers on the internet.

>>6509264
Good shit, anon.

>pasta 2 ways
>clean eating

>kraft
>non GMO

>>6509370
>macaroni and cheese made of 80% industrial chemicals
>paleo

>>6507479
those are nachos, dummy.
>tortilla chips
>refried beans
>cheddar cheese/nacho sauce

>>6502366
>kraft dinner

Canadian spotted.

>>6509370
>paleo

>>6509370
>>6509473
I also see #vegan
Forgive my autism, she's obviously joking with the hashtags.

>>6505415
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FmWp-rI6vSw

>>6509398
Why is it all on a bed of grits?

>>6509264
>Dog food
>Moldy fruit
>Canned corn
>??? & Cheese

My greatest fear is going over to one of my married friends' house and being served something like this. I don't think I could ever fully hide my disgust.

What does "ratchet" mean in this context?

>>6509552
Ghetto.

The thing is, everyone makes meals this bad or worse every day. This #wifeymaterial stuff is what creates these threads.

How dare these bitches think they can outdo even a simple line cook.

Hell, as a French guy that learned how too cook from his mother? Step the fuck back, I've got this.

>>6509520
the bed of grits you're talking about is actually a bed of white corn tortilla chips

>>6509651
Oh fuck, he's right.

I think I found the saddest #wifeymaterial poster.

She's looking for her tall prince charming and is perpetually single.

>>6509689
That looks like a scaled up version of a lunchables pizza.

>>6504191
1 cup of rice is like 4 grams protein. that's fucking retarded

>>6509689
you'd think after a while she'd get better

>>6509370
That's obviously a joke, come on.

>>6509824
>Rachael Ray

Not that I think of Rachael Ray as any sort of super cook or anything, but baby, get over yourself. She could do 50 times better than this with both her hands tied behind her back.

>>6503946
i kind of wish people who ate like this would just die of nutritional deficiency already

vintage wifey material

thank god they included the recipe for this