/ck/ - Food & Cooking

Anyone else ever been figged before?

I recommend it at least once. ^_^

>Figging is the practice of inserting a piece of ginger root into the anus, vagina, or male urethra. Originally applied to horses in a practice known as gingering, it now most-commonly refers to a practice in BDSM

ugh

>"itadakimasu!"

>>4254920
>>4254928

Faggots are a cancer

>>4254935
I can't tell if that lady is a old woman or a young adult.

>"AAAAAH! HOT! HOT! HOT ! HOT! Anon, warn me if you're going to put black pepper in the food!"

>"Anon, these steaks are still pink the middle!!!"

>>4254947
>black pepper
>black girl
Please, no racism in /ck/.

>"Anon, we're at a restaurant! Don't eat ribs with your hands!"

>>4254961
racist racist racist racist racist racist

>>4254935

>get home from school
>parents have ordered loads of Chinese food
>they brought in a low table from the garage and cleaned it so they can eat on it
>family gathered around low end table with shoes off eating Chinese take out
>they're sitting on pillows with legs crossed all Japanese like
>they're all crossing their chopsticks when eating
>my family is white

>>4254947

>black pepper
>too hot

I refuse to believe tastbud-stunted subhumans like that can exist.

>ginger
>fridge
The fuck?

>>4254982
sounds fun though

>white rice
>soy sauce
>"I'm so Asian XD"

>eating at Japanese Sushi Bar
>family orders specialty sushi
>soon as it arrives they start mixing soy sauce, wasabi, and lemon juice (from the lemon that comes with water)
>start dipping their already sauce drenched sushi in soysauce and wasabi mixture

>>4254920

soo.... does it feel good?

>>4255009
It tingles and sort of heats up. It's best to tie the person up first so they can struggle all they like ^_^

>that friend who hates bacon

>that friend who likes breadsticks, but doesn't like pizza crusts

>invite friends over
>they bring some fastfood
>when they leave they still have tons of untouched fries left and half eaten sandwiches
>they throw it in the trash and mix it with napkins and remaining soft drinks
>no one can eat out of the trash now

>>4254984
They do, my cousin is like that.

>>friend stays for dinner
>>makes own plate
>>eats half
>>throws rest in trash

Needless to say, I haven't invited them for dinner since.

If it was her food that she paid for, fine but I was the one who paid for that.

>ordering pizza with friends
>hour long discussion to make sure everyone has a fair amount of pizza of their liking while maintaining a budget + tip
>having to deal with a vegetarian, picky eaters, and those with food allergies

>>4255088
Fucking egoistic pric. Do it just for the sake of cooking.

>2 topping medium pizzas for 5.99 each
>you have 5 friends over
>3 don't have money
>2 are willing to pay for some of the bill and tip (4 dollars each for pizza, 2 dollars each for tip)
>1 friend is a vegetarian
>1 friend will not eat vegetables
>1 friend will only eat pizza with pineapple
>1 friend won't eat beef
>1 friend is allergic to mushrooms and chicken
>delivery fee is $2.00
>You have 20.00 dollars want to tip 20%
>everyone is a fat ass who can eat 6-7slices in one sitting (that's around 3/4th of a medium pizza) before feeling satisfied

>>4255003
>went to Hibachi Grill
>the guy started cooking the rice
>every grain of rice is absolutely coated in soy sauce
>friends are eating that shit up
>I eat a little bit of it
>spend a lot of time on the toilet that night

>>4255106
>3 don't have money
>everyone eats 3/4th's a pizza

There's yo problem

>>4255106
>allergic to mushrooms and chicken

I'm calling bullshit on that one. While those allergies do exist, they're in the 1% range. Your friend is just an asshole who's using a debilitating disease as a front for being picky and fat.

You need new friends, dude.

>>4255110
hibachi sucks because all the flavor is literally in the sauce. once that shit runs off the meat after like 2 minutes it's tasteless.

>>4254961
nigger

>that friend who always makes your belongings feel sticky or oily

>>4255097
>mfw egoistic is not the same as egotistical

>cook perfectly medium and medium rare steaks for family dinner
>mom cuts into it after it's been rested
>ANON, WHY IS THERE BLOOD? WHY IS IT STILL PINK IN THE MIDDLE?
>mfw she collects all the steaks and nukes them in the microwave

>"OH GOD THE FOOD IS TAKING SO LONG! I'm so hungry I can eat a table"

So is this a "shit white people say" thread or a picky eater thread?

>>4255097

Its not an ego thing. She took more food then she was going to be able to finish and threw the rest away.

My parents quite literally beat it into me that you never ever waste food. Take sensible portions, if you finish that, you can always get another helping. If you can't finish your food, pack it up and put it away to eat later but never, ever throw it away unless its obviously gone bad.

>"Hey, anon. Since you're Asian you probably eat a lot of fish, right? I never had fish before. What is fish like? What do you even eat it with?"

>"I hate white rice"

>>4255122
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUGH

>"lets try that new vietnamese place that just opened up!"
>but anon, I don't like chinese food

>>4255165
Well, it’s not like Vietnamese food is that much different from southern Chinese.

>tfw never experience thai medium/hot in America because chefs will always give you a milder version that isn't even remotely spicy due to you being white or young looking

>>4254985
I'm not storing it in the soil you dumb fuck, it lasts a month in the fridge, THAT'S LONG ENOUGH FOR MY PURPOSES

>>4255131
This has happened to me. During the microwaving I left the house, went and had dinner at Red Robin alone.
College was nice, I moved out and don't have to see them except on the holidays I choose to visit.

>putting your soy sauce in the fridge

>>4255174
You don’t need to store ginger in the fridge

>>4255172
>Go to Thai restuarant
>They have a spiciness rating system on their food
>Order a 4 star spicy food
>Literally very good but very hot
>Waiter is pretty busy so I don't have a lot of water
>But can't stop eating because it's so good
>My mouth is burning to death but if this is how I die, then so be it, I must feed this all consuming urge for this delicious food
>Finally waitress comes over and offers me water
>Can tell I'm burning up
>I say "yeah it's really spicy but it's super good as well"
>She offers "oh you can order it less spicy next tim"
>Looks visibly concerned
>Say "Oh but it's so good"
>Keeps pressing the issue that I can order it less spicy
>Feel really awkward
I... I don't know why. It was good, I wasn't saying it was bad, I could handle it I just need more water next time

>>4255194
It’s not good for business if your clientele because of spice overdose.

>>4255201
Can that happen? Dying of spice overdose I assume is what you meant? I don't think I would have died ...it was good

>>4255205
Uh, whoops. Yes, I meant to put in “dies” there.

>that friend who has orgasms whenever she eats

>>4254984
My dad is that way. I don't understand it.

>>4255122
I think my controller just got dirty by me opening that thumbnail.

>>4255106
>remaining friends with someone who eats pineapple pizza
shiggity diggity doopity bop

>>4255045
>^_^
>>>/a/
don't let the door hit you. we don't want weeaboo prints on our door.

>be roommates with gamer gurl
>go in kitchen to see her perched up in her chair like an owl
>she's eating a sandwich with 2 hands
>eating with mouth open
>making nomnomnom sounds

>Sunday.
>Dad starts making lunch around 8:00 AM.
>Big chunky pot roast with shitty cuts of meat he doesn't even attempt to clean.
>Giant pot of Chicken Soup, but theres not enough met, veg, or noodles and it's basically chicken water.
>An entire roast chicken with Mashed Potatoes.
>Tell them they're wasting money by making too much fucking food.
>"We wanna have enough for leftovers."
>Taking soup to work every fucking day.
>Still reheating that shitty pot roast 4 days later.
>Parents complain me and my brother don't eat enough.
>They're making enough to feed the National Guard EVERY. FUCKING. WEEKEND.

Reason #27 why I need to move out. Motherfucking portion control.

>>4255355
hhhehehe

>>4255358

I sort of know that feel.

Every Thanksgiving, my parents make enough food to feed 12 people for days even though we're a small family of 4 and hardly invite anyone. I had to eat Thanksgiving leftovers for almost 2 weeks while being scolded for not eating enough leftovers.

>be roommates with a fatty
>trying to sleep upstairs
>hear some noises in downstairs kitchen
>I'm a paranoid person so I go to downstairs kitchen
>living room and kitchen lights are off
>turn on kitchen lights
>fat roommate is drinking pancake batter out of a mug

>>4255194
>yfw

>>4255373
this would be literally my exact reaction to that

>roommates that complain about dirty dishes when they don't even wash their own dishes for days

>>4255373
i threw up a little

>>4255146

I'm going to guess pet peeves or food rage stories

>>4255373

oh god why

>roommate just stops washing dishes
>continues to eat on dirty plates
>fried eggs every day for a couple weeks caked with dried pasta sauce and whatever else he ate
>other roommates complain about having to look at them
>stores them in the cupboard dirty and takes them out to use

>>4255373
Jesus, if I were in that situation I'd rather walk in on a burglar.

>>4255408

Is he dead?

>>4254984

had a dish sent back because

>"they didn't like the seasoning"
...I didn't put any on...
>they put about a tablespoon of pepper on it

>mfw

>that friend that hoarded a bunch of Fiery Habanero Doritos when it was selling again and still has a bag even though it got discontinued years ago
>he says no one is allowed to eat it

>>4255408

are people really that lazy to take 15 minutes out of their day to wash a couple of dishes?

washing dishes benefits everyone

>>4255414
Haven't heard from him in years - could be. It went on for a couple months, then he started washing them intermittently.

He also had bronchitis and would spit gobs of mucous in an old salsa jar. He used the same jar and emptied it when it got to the brim.

My gf came over and we made dinner and when we went to the table it was like Jurassic Park - our steps were making the mucous jar shake. She basically wouldn't come over after that.

Ever time I tell someone that story I actually gag a little.

>>4255418

*are people really that lazy that they can't take 15 minutes out of their day to wash a couple of dishes?

I understand being tired from work, but when you have dishes unwashed for days it

>>4255424

Absolutely Disgusting

>>4255424
this is why I don't have room mates.

>families that hoard all the crab legs in a buffet and end up not eating them all

>>4255427
He would also sit around wearing only a housecoat and unknowingly (I hope) do the Basic Instinct move constantly.

Thankfully I can't remember most of that year anymore.

>>4255424
Calling him an animal would be an insult to animals. That nasty fucker is in a class of his own.

>"HEY, ANON! I'm trying to learn how to be a good cook like you. This is my first time making tacos. Try them! Don't be afraid to be honest with me." ;)

>>4255448
did you eat them and then throw up on the plate?

>"YO ANON! Let's get some friends together and cook something epic like those guys on EPIC MEAL TIME!"

>>4255455
I would eat that without the bagel bites or pizza rolls since they will fall off anyway.

>Did you enjoy your sandwich, Anon?
>Good, because I spat in it while you weren't looking.

>>4255448

not overreacting at all...I had a little bit of vomit come up

>>4255448

>tfw you took that picture years ago because it was your first time making tacos and you wanted feedback from /ck/ and people still make fun of you for making those tacos

>/ck/ meet up
>milk steak and jellybeans everywhere
>trusting food from a complete stranger that was willing to have complete strangers in his home

>>4255487
Poor baby, I'm so sorry. :( I'm sure your tacos are delicious now though!

>>4255373
>be at friends' place drinking
>one of them disappears near the end of the night
>I get up to head home
>have to walk through kitchen to get out
>all the lights are out
>except the fridge light
>friend who disappeared is sitting cross-legged on the floor in front of it
>his fingers are jammed deep in a jar of Cheez Whiz
>there's Cheez Whiz running down his shirt
>Cheez Whiz all over his fucking face
>he sees me and panics
>throws it back in the fridge
>I fall to my knees in horror
>everyone comes running up

They were too late. No one will know what I saw that day

>>4255330
should you really let yourself be trolled by such a weak effort?

>>4255448
>>4255487

B-but...the carrots. And the juice...WHY?

>>4255536

Seemed like a good idea at the time. At that time I didn't live in an area where tacos are popular. No taco trucks/no taco bell.

>>4255534

oh god. At least have crackers if you're going to do that.

>>4254920
I've made the mistake of scratching my lads following the handling of superhot chillies. After the godawful agony subsides the sensation is a pleasant warmth. I guess I'd call it an artificial arousal of sorts. Totally not worth the initial pain but I'd consider trying it again with a milder variety.

>>4255009
Haven't tried but >>4255045 explains it well enough. For males the sensation makes it difficult to clench the muscles back there, which is typically necessary for the male orgasm. So it works for orgasm-denial play as well.

>>4255106
>3 don't have money
3 must not be very hungry then... or will be very hungry shortly.

>>4255319
Shiggy diggy shut it! Hawaiian style is awesome.

>>4255330
Consider for a moment the website you are frequenting. Take all the time you need. After it clicks you can help me pick out a bento box. It can't be pinku (that's japanese for pink)...

>>4255373
My buddy walked in on his former landwhale of a house-mate eating butter out of the tub with a spoon. On the bright side the guy 180'd a short while back, got on an Herbalife kick and has dropped a massive amount of weight. He's still a very sheep-like churchgoer though which is probably why it worked for him (in addition to replacing meals with shakes or however it works he also buys all their other crap like soap, lotions or whatever) but I'm happy for'em regardless.

>>4255408
I'll never get this. I can't not wash a dish after I've used it.

>>4255566
Autism Guy?

>female housemates cook for themselves for once, do it as a team, cook the most simplest shit ever
>"OHHHHH GODDDDDDD THIS IS SO GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOODDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD WE SHOULD BE CHEFS WE ARE MASTERCHEFS BABY LOL SOOOOOOO GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOODDDDDDDDDDDDDD FOOOOD ORGASMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM"

>>4255571
Ugh, I have a friend who does that. He burns all his food and moans as he eats it, shit is disturbing to watch.

>>4255571
Ugggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

>>4255571

>that friend who actually ejaculates when he eats something delicious and you can actually see his semen bursting out of his shorts

>"HEY ANON! I bet you can't tell if I'm eating a large cherry or a small apple!"

>>4255571
>pt 2
>i cook for myself
>sometimes spend several hours preparing something if my uni workload allows it
>they turn their nose up at absolutely anything and everything
>make something fairly common like beef stroganoff
>"EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW WAHTS THATTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT"
>its called beef stroganoff, it is probably one of the simplest and most delicious beef dishes you can make
>"OK"
>"EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW"
>would you like to try some?
>"EWWWWWWWWWWW NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO"
>mfw i hear them talking about getting married some day

>prepare food for people
>before they even take a bit they drench in condiments

>>4255455
>fractal pizza
mai sides

>>4255628
Just to let you know, that isn't technically a fractal.

>>4255568
Nope. smib when I do namefag, usually in /vp/'s WFG but I've been too busy for any kind of gaming lately so I've been neglecting that board. Just haven't had any sleep and must unfortunately remain a while for a while longer. Replying to whatever just gives me something to occupy my mind so I don't zonk out.

>association yourFT
Dunno what yourFT is but here's the association:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sYJhhKSXOBo

>>4255631
ain't nobody going to say "cantor set pizza", that's ridiculous

fractal will have to do

>>4255642
>remain awake* for a while longer
It's not looking good.

>>4255106

>>4255628
>>4255631
>>4255649

I like you folk.

>"Why are you eating chicken adobo and rice with your hand?"

>>4255782
>"Why are you eating steak with your hands?"

Not that I'd actually do it in public.

>>4255787

I'd understand eating steak with hands if it's already been cut up. If not you'd be a knife and fork.

I do eat steak with hands sometimes when I'm feeling lazy, no one is around, and I don't want to wash more dishes.

>>4255330
>/a/
We don't want emoticon using scum either

>>4255358
SUNDAY

SUNDAY

SUNDAY

>>4255626
THIS

>Not using your hands for pizza

>>4255590
That doesn't even make sense. Why would somebody ejaculate from eating?

>>4255358
Oh god my parents always do this kinda shit. I just try and quickly eat as much of it as possible in as little time as possible. Once it hits that 7 day old period no matter how hard you try you won't be able to stomach it.

My parents made enough food for the family this new year. We ate it for 2 weeks

>>4255373
i literally laughed out loud reading this.

loud

my mom every time she eats

>takes a bite
>"MMMMMF"
>"HNNGH"
>"OH MY GOD MMM"

fucking creams herself every time she eats, even if it's just a mcd's grilled chicken sandwich

and then she won't eat all day and it'll be like 4 in the afternoon and she'll be like i'm so starving i'm so starving i'm so starving and she'll wolf something down and ten minutes later she'll be moaning in agony from stuffing her face

>>4254982
I just got a case of jelly

>>4255878
I literally didn't even the simplest physical reaction towards it.

Quiet.

>>4255487
Your tacos transcend time

Am I the only one that finds it weird when someone eats a sandwich with knife and fork?

>>4255893

depends on the sandwich

>>4255881

>>takes a bite
>>"MMMMMF"
>>"HNNGH"
>>"OH MY GOD MMM"

My dad does the same, he'll even do the *GASP* OHHH'' thing after drinking

>>4255477
i have no problem with that. as long as it fucking tastes good.

>>4255440
Sounds like he was doing that on purpose to make you leave.

>>4255893
If the sandwich is bigger than that someone's mouth, it's actually acceptable

>>4255410

Despite being sealed in packets, doritos won't last forever, make sure you laugh at him when he finally opens one and they are all soft and bad-tasting.

>>4255893
sandwiches that have been prepared like a monte cristo are also acceptable to be fork'n'knifed

>>4255626
>that feel
My best friend/roommate drenches everything in yellow mustard before he takes a bite.
I die a little inside every time he does it.

>4255358
Are you me?

>>4256242
lrn2quote

>>4254920
Shoving vegetables up ur pooper is not good for long-term development of societies.
The antique Greek way to deal with people not paying denbs was to insert a huge turnip into their arseholes - in public. Long long ago it was considered extremely shameful in Grease to have a huge, thick, juicey hot Turnip shoved up your poopie. I guess there were a lot of people with denbs so they finally got used to the denbs and arsefucking at the same time. Now they not afraid of anything and will bring the Euro down.

What happened to this thread? What happened to those posts?

>>4255394
>had a roommate
>he didn't do shit
>I decided to clean up after myself only and let him see what he doesn't do
>I'm working full time and going to school and he's just going to school
>plays LoL all day
>hardly leaves his computer
>never cleans anything
>house looks like shit in a week
>"durrr let's clean!"
>he cleans the area around his computer and sits back down to play LoL
>bitches that the whole house is still a mess
>start saving my money so my girlfriend and I could move in with another couple
>tell his fatass I can't contribute $200 a week to the food budget anymore
>get home from work and see a letter saying I have 24 hours to get my shit out (it was a house owned by his dad so HE didn't pay shit for rent and got $50 a week to survive off of but he spent it on stupid shit)
>durr it's because I don't like your girlfriend (she didn't even live there)

>>4255003
there's a sushi bar in LA that will actually kick you out if you try to eat certain things with soy sauce. its fucking great

>>4256631
They sound pretentious as fuck. I wouldn't eat there.

>>4256631
No, it's a marketing strategy to appeal to a certain group of pretentious hipsters and weeaboos.

>friend is over at my house
>he cooked something and said I was out of pepper
>tell him where I keep my spices
>in that same cupboard I keep all of my spices
>have a sandwich bag full of Oregano up there
>few days later friend calls me and tells that the weed he found in my cupboard was bad
>wut
>check my cupboard
>oregano is gone
>mfw

>>4256678
what
friend?
what
I'm assuming you just made this up, that's the sort of thing you get stabbed for

>>4256683

I don't mind if people cook in my house as long as they clean up after themselves, which they all do. This guy just went full retard and tried to smoke oregano.

>>4256678
i loled

>>4256691
No I'm talking about stealing a whole bag of your friends weed

>>4256678
Is your friend 12?

>>4256678

The hell kind of idiot can't tell oregano from weed?

I mean, as soon as he opened the bag, he should have realized that it smells nothing like weed.

>>4256698
seriously, this is either made up or your friend is 10/a mongoloid

>>4256702
we all know his friend was white, there is no need to be upset

>>4254982
I know I'm 17 hours late, but I just want to tell you that I feel sorry for you anon.

>>4255865

because the food is so good it's orgasmic. All them moans.

>YOU EXPECT ME TO EAT THAT!!!!!!!!!!


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gGNs1VXeFJA

>>4254984
have you never been to the midwest?

>>4256148
My boyfriend covers everything in cheese and sour cream.
>thisiswhyyourefat

>>4256286
Quotes were making posts disappear yesterday.

>>4258146

that explains everything

>>4258062

I'm not American. I thought England was most famous for having bland food.

>>4258226
Murkan here

Never been to England, but I'd put even odds on Midwest vs. England

>>4258228
England has some pretty good heavy, hearty dishes.

Midwest has.... scrapple?

>go out to diner with friend
>order burgers
>he gets one with two patties, fried egg, and a side of onion rings
>opens burger
>puts onion ring on top
>unscrews salt shaker top
>pours a quarter of the container onto the burger
>"Man, I don't know why you don't ask them to take the ketchup off your burger. I find it tastes so disgusting."

This guy...

>have three bottles in cupboard at my old apt
>friends come over
yo bro could I get a drink?
sure guy, but all I got is that sake shit so and so bought me
>bottle is covered in chink symbols
>bottle of mushroom soy is covered in chink symbols

mfw my friend has a glass full of dark liquid and seems to be getting a buzz off it

>>4255003
Working as a Walter at a sushi restaurant and this always rustle my jimmies

>>4255355
i dont wanna
i dont wanna
i dont wanna

>>4255079
>not telling your friends to put their leftovers in the bowl to feed your dog
>not having a feast after they leave
>not giving your dog a fry or 2
dumb asshole

>>4255131
this pisses me off so much to the point i'll just have a bowl of cereal for dinner, slaving over the grill for 30 minutes + making side dishes and having it nuked afterwards

>>4258226
I've been pretty much everywhere. All inall, I found Singapore had the blandest food.

>MMMM mmm MMMM mmmm MM mm MMMMMM!

>>4256678
That reminds me:

>13 years old
>My mom used to make small piroques for my lunchbag
>One day I didnt eat it and left it in my bag, just to forget all about it
>A couple months later Im called to the kitchen where she is standing, furious
>She is holding up the bag of rotting piroque that has been grinded and pounded by books for months
>Screaming at the top of her lungs"WHAT IS THIS? WHAT IS THIS?"
>Try to explain her its just an old lunch but she'll have none of it
>She ends up threatening me to admit its weed or she will have it send to the police to confirm it
>I tell her to just do it
>She then opened the bag and, to my horror and amusement, took a deep breath, probably trying to confirm it's weed
>That fucking look on her face

I never heard for it again, but damn it will be fun to bring up to a family reunion

>"I don't know how to cook. Only thing I can do is make sandwiches"

>orders food at restaurant
>when food arrives picks out almost half of the ingredients off dish
>not just ordering food without all those things you don't like

>>4255194
Water doesn't help spiciness, asshole. You drink milk or eat some type of bread to cool the spiciness. In fact, it'd be better to not drink anything if you're only choice was water.

>>4255448
oh sweet merciful god, what the fuck is that?
also
>"hey anon, i got some expresso beans, want an americano"

"Why are you not peeling those potatoes anon!"

The only one I can think of off the top of my head..

>Cook simple meal for myself and friend
>They only have a few bites
>"Everything okay? You hardly touched your food.."
>"It's not a big deal.. it's just that the noodles aren't fully cooked.."
>Just apologize because I don't feel like trying to explain 'Al Dente'

>>4255448
Lol did somebody eat this crap? I want to see pics.

>>4260592
This. That's why naan bread exists.

>melting some butter in the microwave
>must've put it on 2:00 instead of :20
>don't realize until the timer goes off
>nothing in the dish or on the microwave
>the butter is literally GONE
still don't understand it to this day

>>4255626
I'll admit to being one of those people, though I do have ....suddenly I'm having a brainfart and can't think of the word I want... ANYWAY I don't do it automatically, unless it's a dish I've had a ton of times before prepared in a way I'm familiar with so I know what it tastes like before I add anything.

Examples would be pretty much anything my mom makes because she always caters to my dad's blandness: Tuna salad is just tuna and mayo, I add ground habanero and capers; meat is always roasted (so basically pot roast or roast chicken); fish is almost always salmon, and pan-seared, I've requested we do a tartare or ceviche sometime, but I have no skill in cooking so I don't want to do it without her helping me along lest I burn the house down.

Don't get me wrong. I love my mom, and my mom actually is a good cook, I just wish she'd work on expanding my dad's palate (pallete? however it's spelled, it's 3am and I'm too tired to bother checking) so he'll learn to like more than three things.

>Dad makes one of the most basic dishes ever for dinner
>MMM THIS IS REAL GOOD, ISNT IT?
>MMMMMMMMMMMMM SO GOOD MMMMM MM MMMMM
>Dad takes drink of whatever he's drinking
>GULP GULP AAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH
>Everything he eats makes insanely loud crunching noises for some reason

I'm so glad I moved out 2 years ago. I also have my girlfriend conditioned to not make any slurping noises when she eats, or to make the AAAHHHH sound after drinking. Which took a while because she used to live with a bunch of Asians when she was in college and apparently it's "respectful to the chef" if you slurp the fuck out of your food.

>>4261025
>but I have no skill in cooking so I don't want to do it without her helping me along lest I burn the house down

Are you a 8 year old girl? You are joking about the "burn the house down" part right? I'll assume so.
Just try and make the dishes you want to make, if they come out like crap it just adds to the experience. Also, dishes like ceviche and tartare are incredibly simple to make.

>>4255003
Meh, depends how good the sushi bar is. At the local one I get lunch at sometime I dunk everything and mix my soy and wasabi. At the one I go to for real good eats I do the dip and flip, keep everything separate, etc.

>>4255795
What? How is a knife and a fork dishes?

>>4261020

And today we learned about evaporation

>>4261096
Really? Are you that fucking retarded?

I don't like the taste of ginger.

>>4261020
>>4261096
>>4261104

Butter does have water in it, so evaporate does happen, but the actual lipid (fat) doesn't evaporate as easily. What happened was most likely decomposition (due to high heat)

>>4261058
>You are joking about the "burn the house down" part right?

Of COURSE I am. Doesn't mean I wouldn't prefer to have someone who knows what they're talking about to monitor my progress. But your point is taken.

>>4261058
I'm not sure suggesting raw meat or acidulation cooking dishes for novice cooks is a good idea.

>>4256695
THIS
Who the fuck does that?

>>4255896
Sogwich?

>>4254984
my dad even finds Sweet Chili Sauce too hot...

>buy some spicy cheetos
>dad is coming over for dinner
>make some medium-rare steak, mashed potatoes and rice
>notices my spicy cheetoes, takes the spicy cheetos and puts it on a bowl of rice
>he's eating spicy cheeto rice
>mfw

I honestly don't know how I should feel about this. I wouldn't call it disgusting or anything, but he has some weird tastes.

>>4264591
>spicy cheeto rice
That sounds far more appealing than it has any right to.

>>4255876
>>4255367
>>4255358
>complaining about too much food

>>4255626
I have a friend who will add salt, pepper, or hot sauce (sometimes all three) to food before even tasting it.

>>4264591
my grandma used to make me that when i was little because we were poor. it's actually good

>>4264591
My dad would always eat tuna fish (or chicken) salad (which means mayo+fish or chicken) on white bread with grape jelly. Shit is vile.

>>4260840
that picture is horrifying, the longer i stare at it the more distressed and disturbed i become

>>4255194
>how do i into greentext story

>>4266192
No. You don't have a friend like that.

>>4264591

Hot Cheetoes are good with something starchy like white bread or rice.

>>4258235
Midwest: corn dogs, gyros, horse shoes, italian beef, chicago pizza... it's not that bad. Just all killer fat

>>4255515
what exactly does milksteak taste like? Is it at all edible? Or just a waste of good meat

>>4258334
srs? Singapore has a wide variety and rich history of delicious food. I lived there for a year and almost never had a bad meal. Where the fuck were you eating?

>>4261000
I thought it was because they had no cutlery

>>4261085
so you don't wash your cutlery?

>>4266792

Taste exactly how it sounds. Creamy meat. An almost gravy.

>live in midwest
>any time i go out to eat at a restaurant i make a scene because i literally baptize my food in black pepper

shit be bland yo

>>4258334
You're eating the wrong shit man. What did you have there?

>>4254913

lol.

I got exactly this from my housemate and his sister when they were looking through the back of our fridge.

Ginger is such a fucking pain in the arse to cook with.

The margins between not being able to taste it and it overpowering everything in your sauce are insanely tight.

>>4254942
Old woman, look at her hands

>sister has chinese boyfriend over for Thanksgiving
>we take out the cranberry sauce to eat
>chinese boyfriend asks in excitement
>"Oh, is that pig's blood?"
>we all look at him like he's chinese

>>4268260

I'm guessing you're using ginger of various different ages. The problem is not an imaginary fine line between too little and too much; the problem is that some days you have strong ginger and other days you have weak ginger. Taste some before you cook with it. That way you'll know how strong that particular piece is and can adjust the recipe accordingly.