/ck/ - Food & Cooking

>loid have moicy

Since when does Eggs Florentine have tomatoes?

>>4170291
Since fuck you.

>>4170271
The potatoes look good. I'm not into hollandaise, though.

I can appreciate that, nice op

>>4170307
>hollandaise

i see hollandaise and i think thurston howell iii


fucking gilligan

>potatoes chopped with a cheese grater
>your drunk feta go home
>flame thrower on the muffins
>not enough "florentine"
>who plated that Michael J. Fox?

>>4170344
who really gives a shit what they cut the potatoes with

what's wrong with feta?

the muffins are kinda burned I'll give you that

not enough spinach? looks like a fuckton of it to me

sloppily served, I'll give you that one too

>>4170350

>who really gives a shit what they cut the potatoes with

Obviously me, and the issue is that they are all different shapes hence they would never cook evenly.

>what's wrong with feta?

It's blasphemous

>the muffins are kinda burned I'll give you that

damn right...now start over.

>not enough spinach? looks like a fuckton of it to me

That's just because it's RAW...if it were properly blanched it would only take up 1/10 of it's current volume.

>sloppily served, I'll give you that one too

srs'ly were you taking it from behind when you were putting the food on the plate?

>>4170344
Your turn to post yours!

Can't wait to flame it to shit.

Go on then, post it.

>>4170368
Fuck off, Little Gaylord Fauntleroy. He'll eat his breakfast the way he likes it. Go back to your palace of perfection and shut the fuck up.

never even heard of eggs florentine but that looks goddam delicious, well done

>>4170271
Taters look tasty. Uneven cooking is ok for taters like this. You get soft, you get crispy.
Hollandaise looks nice.
Where's the bacon?

7.5/10. Would nom.

>>4170368
>autism

I love a good hollandaise but it always seems like overkill on eggs benedict to me. It's already a sauce of egg yolk and butter, and you're going to, what, pour it over still more egg yolk? Yeesh.

Looks awesome OP! Those potatoes look solid too.

>I mean what are you a fucking 2 year fucking fag who never cooked in his life nice store bought mealy tomatoes I bet you used a mix from the store for that Hollandaise sauce and I bet frozen spinach too lol did you feed your shit potatoes to a dog and let it puke them up on your plate after an hour of digestion??? Nice burnt presumably store-bought English muffins I like your plating to do you just sprinkle burnt pieces of muffin and chunks of spinach around like the plate was dropped on the table from 4 feet?? And you set your table like a fucking diner and feel the need to have TWO count 'em TWO knifes in your picture although I can't blame you because you'd need diamond encrusted titanium serrations on that knife to slowly grind your way through the hardened carbon exoskeleton encasing those terribly dry and desiccated English muffins that you dropped into a volcano and fished out for this meal. You make me sick you fucking try-hard faggot I could make better in my sleep fuck face.

>>4170344
>who plated that, Michael J Fox?

I lol'd

>>4170571
I love eggs Benedict, but I can see how people who may not be huge egg fans wouldn't like hollandaise on top of eggs. Personally, I love it, but I also love Hollandaise sauce in general, or even better, Bearnaise. Particularly over asparagus or artichokes, or any green, tangy vegetable.

As a Culinary school faggot who has to deal with this shit

>Hack-job of a cut on potatoes
>Why does your Hollandaise look like diner gravy?
>Burnt edges on the god forsaken English muffin
>Taking picture of a dirty fucking plate
>Serving tomatoes out of season

>>4170571

If you're a fan of Hollandaise, why do you not recognize the consistency is completely fucked.

>>4170605
>trying to sound important because you're throwing all your money and future income away on culinary school.

Have fun with that, junior.

>>4170625

>2nd largest employer in my country next to goverment
>Only one here not working at a diner for the rest of eternity because i actually know what a Julienne's dimension is

>>4170633

Yeah don't listen to them bro, I went to culinary school too and now I'm the head chef at Applebee's.

>>4170643

Your community college doesn't count. Considering my school was acceptable enough for Bocuse to send his son here, im pleased.

>>4170633
>implying you need culinary school to learn those things.

Whatever helps you sleep at night.

>>4170651

Njoi ur'e 0 Michilin stars fagt.

>>4170649


haha, the CIA suck you really need to step up JWU level.

>>4170654
This is fun. Watching you squirm as you justify your overly self-important stance. Keep going, it's hilarious.

>>4170655

>JW
>Hasn't even had Bocuse or Thomas Keller visit them

>>4170659

>imply their even half as great as Emeril


BAM BITCHES

>>4170663

But in all seriousness I have a friend that goes to J&W and hes borderline retarded, its a joke compared to the CIA.

>>4170605
>>4170633

What these people (>>4170651
>>4170643
>>4170625
>>4170660)
are trying to get across to you, you fucking faggot, in our distinctive /ck/ way, is that the real chefs on here come to give advice and be helpful and rarely if never talk about themselves. You came to insult other people's food and make yourself look important. Which will be an automatic take down. Your best bet is to leave now and come back when you've learned some humility, you useless hack. Culinary school, indeed.

>>4170675

The fact fellow chefs get trolled so easily almost sickens me.

>People wanting compliments on bagged Hollandaise

I have no sympathy for these people.

>>4170675

I thought he was just venting and not in a personal way, but leave it to "food industry veterans" to get anal pained about the slightest perceived act of one-upmanship. I guess this kind of emotional frailty and constant need for validation must be why my cousin broke up with her chef boyfriend and married a banker. And all this time I assumed it was about financial stability.

>>4170667

lol, anyone can get into the CIA it's like a revolving door of druggies and faggots that took home ec. in high school. J-dub is a professional school with real industry professional instructors not some washed up eurotrash that can't hack it in a real kitchen the CIA employs.

>>4170690

I guess that's why the centuries best chef sent his son here instead of there then, huh?

I've had the personal honor of studying under Bobby Flay in New York for roughly 1yr. OP, I have to say that eggs Florentine looks average at best. You did not blanch your spinach and the hollendaise looks like a gravy from KFC.

Those potatos look as if you contemplated mash. Become a tripfag. No anon on here can cook (besides /ck/ who doesn't post here anymore) and the trips are far and few between.

Shit tier:
Progun
Scaek

bland tier:
HeartsonFire
Classic

good tier:
100Bowls

This board sucks to know end. I wish the real chefs would stand up and deliver.

that looks fucking tasty. I would also deliberately over-toast the english muffin like you did, these niggers are being pedantic. A crunch-factor on an otherwise soft and gooey item would complete it.

>>4170700

No it's because they gave him some meaningless bullshit award "greatest chef of the who gives a fuck" award and he got guilt-ed into sending his no talent, brain dead son there.

>>4170702

Most of the anons here cannot cook let alone be an *artiste* in the kitchen. I've always wanted to study under Pepin but Flay showed many wonders under his tutelage. I've met and cooked with many renowned chefs:

G. Garvin
Peter Kelly
Mario Batali


>>4170706
go back across the border you wetback greasy haired lawnmower pusher

>>4170700

that's the second time you brought up this faggot, what is he slippin you the D in between class?

>>4170702
I'd say average is pretty good for his first fucking try. And how is 100bowl good-tier? He posts restaurant food.

>>4170715

I'm pretty sure France gave him the award, and considering we don't even have a campus in France...

Looks pretty good to me.

10/10 would eat

>>4170716

Relentlessly masturbating upon yourself in front of an online audience who is completely in awe at your grandeur, clapping and shouting your demonstrable title: 'artiste! you are an artiste!
It must be amazing to be you anon, the culinary artiste!
My next beschamel sauce shall be the exact flavour and consistency of your holy semen.

>>4170730

You are so fucking stupid, no wonder you go to the CIA....

http://www.cianewswire.com/2011/04/paulbocuse.html

>>4170742
That gif made me fucking lose it.

/thread is shit.

tl:dr
>anon posts pic of hard work
>people rape him
>turns into massive bitch fit

>>4170688
Did the point of that reply just float completely over your useless little head? Brainless twat.

I'll let you in on a little secret. You are all simple-minded swine.

>>4170702
How fucking DARE you suggest that anyone should become a tripfag. You are a cunt of the highest order. Go beg for recognition and validity somewhere else.

>>4170734
don't feed the artistic troll. If he was really great that he think he is I don't think he would be on 4chan. It would be some hi brow culinary forum.

>>4170716
>Batali

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Oh god, that's the most I've laughed all day. Faggot.

Also OP that plate looks delicious. Would nom the hell out of it.

>>4170773
Seriously. Do some people forget what website they are posting on?

>>4170768

genius is often mistaken for insanity

>>4170730
speaking of swine though, I'd bend her over and make her squeal like a pig.

>>4170770

And who have you cooked with that is *world renowned*. Your mum? Grammy?

>>4170773

I will post where ever I feel like it? I have watch some of your posting over a couple of years and you have the experience of a short order cook in some restaurant. I presume Applebees? Up your cooking skills and venture away from cooking *pleb* dishes.

You all are a bunch of ramen, In & Out, PB&J chefs. Deal with it.

>>4170773
>culinary forum.
Does that even exist

I really need someone else other than 4chan to talk about food.

>>4170271
Looks nice OP, I'd eat and enjoy.

>>4170812
>continuously calling himself and anon "chefs"

>>4170812

Get a load of this guy...he wore culinary crocs for one service and washed dishes at one of Fays restaurants that he never even goes to...now he thinks he's gods gift the the culinary world.

>>4170812
And you're a fat dick sucking faggot who doesn't know shit about cooking. Obviously. Deal with it. No one is going to take you seriously, because you post about food and television chefs with all the alacrity, subtlety, and candor of a fat, raging, rhinoceros.

I never would have thought the worst thread on /ck/ would be a bunch of frustrated restaurant employees behaving like children

My abilities are always progressing even by reading this forum, the things I should not do in cooking. Every thread is in regards to :

>I left my parents flat and have to cook for myself!?
>How to make ramen better/recipes (?)
>Chipotle (no chef goes to a fast food chain, ever
>carb laden meal, no proportions, no presentation (ala 4mouseguy), and cheaply made.

And yes I have worked in every area of the kitchen. Search sous chef on youtube and I am in one of the first 3 vids (non speaking part).

>>4170838

I use the term humorously for mostly everyone here. /ck/ when she posted here was a chef. Also there was one rich-anon who had exquisite tastes in his food.

>>4170870
>Search sous chef on youtube and I am in one of the first 3 vids (non speaking part)

And another attention whore joins the fray.

But, you are right about this.
>abilities are always progressing even by reading this forum,
People should never discount or close their minds to learning new things from new sources.

>>4170897
his counters!!! and he always made awesome food.

>>4170855
That image.

You just know that cute little thing is taking him for everything she can get, he's probably never getting laid, and it's both hilarious and sad.

this thread is so bad, it broke all of 4chan

>>4170907
>>4170855
Not glamor shooped. Still want?

>>4170935
Asexual indeed. I've known fat hairy men who looked more like women than that thing.

My apologies, I was being prejudiced.

>>4170716
Flay sucks shit. Did he teach you how to make that queer orange sauce he puts on everything? Or did you just gag on his cock the whole time you were there?

>>4170902
I didn't start making 3 star cuisines anon. I learned, read, and was tutored in this fine art.

Stop watching food network and go out and cook! HeartsonFire made an excellent contribution when she posted the book dump.

>>4170974
At least his shit is a delicasy compared to the pig slop you microwave. I bet you own a microwave don't you, depressing.

Fart Rocket

>>4170993
??? you said the "one rich-anon who had exquisite taste.." i was commenting that i believe that this was the same dude with his entire counter top was a cutting board and they looked pristine.

i don't come here to learn how to cook, i come here to share my experiences..it's all good.

>>>>4171008

I'm so sorry for that. My apologies. His counters were gorgeous!

>>4171003
I do because I'm poor and work at red lobster. I only microwave my popcorn. Also what makes you so great? Please enlighten me sensei.

Red Lobster is the bigges pile of dog shit restaurant.... Fuck that place. Red Slopster. Your job sucks, dude.

>>4171037
>>4171037 wow way to go. Told me something iwas already awareof. Sorry junior can't be picky about jobsin this economy. wherfe do you work?

>>4171027
I've worked at RL for 5 years and 3 of those years as an expo. I own a microwave and I don't give a shit what some so-called *chef* thinks.

If that guy is a chef I am sure he is disliked by his co-workers if he has that attitude at work.

I'm done with this thread. That guy, unfortunately, has rustled my jimmies which is very hard to do.

Rustled your "jimmies'? Jesus Fuck no wonder why you work at Red Lobster.

>>4171003
At least I can spell "delicacy", you fucking twatfaced moron.

>>4171061
>posting on 4chan
>complaining about 4chan slang

>>4171077
You can also spell "microwave" too, you fucken slob

god. talk about a soul-sucking thread...

why don't you faggots knock it off.

>>4171083
>fucken

Stay in school, kid.

>>4171088
you guys are giving in. just ignore it and they cant do anything

I plan to post a thread about real *cooking* in the next day or so. It will be something basic like a duck cassoulet or maybe a beef tournedos in mushroom, mustard, and red wine sauce.

It will be exciting. It will also be step by step for everyone to follow.

Benedict > Florentine

In my humble opinion

has one thread ever contained so many faggots with a misplaced sense of grandeur and unverifiable lies about the people and places they have experienced?

>>4171144
No one likes tripfucks. You'd be better off posting anonymously. I always post anonymously, but if I'm going to do something big, like a recipe thread, I always use the same image in my OP. That's about as familiar as I would ever get around here. There's a reason why tripfags garner so much hatred. No one like an attention whore.

>4171210

There are a few on here that are not bad ( and even helpful sometimes) on this board. Excluding Scaek, Progun and Scythe there are a few that actually contribute anon.

But they are all tripfags so whatevs.

>>4171210

Actually this is true there is a direct correlation between triping and shitpoasting....all tripfags; gooby pls.

>>4171234
that picture is horrible.

>>4171210
>>4171234
>>4171238

i hate trips too, for the most part. but i understand that i'm a bit small minded, and when i use the linked CSS to hide their trips, it no longer has any effect on me. sceak can talk about fudge and guys riding him all he wants, and i never realize it's him and his need to advertise personal details unrelated to this board.

http://pastebin.com/6AenPt3T

go to the lower section of that link, and copy the code, and put it in custom CSS in the inline extension, and it's like having orkin come over and kill all the nasty cockroaches. the posts will still be there, but since i can't see the ego ridden names, my herpes does not flare up.

>>4171299

why should we have to do all this nonsense to filter out tripfags...this is an ANONYMOUS posting board Moot should just disable all their tips and be done with it.