/ck/ - Food & Cooking

in b4 pictures of either blue rare or well done steak, depending on which troll

sure why not

A classic!

http://www.thesneeze.com/steve-dont-eat-it/

>>3823098
there are very few things in this world I dont think I could eat and that is one of them, I need to know more about it like what that liquid is and if those critters are cooked

>3823110 I uploaded that classic C-Town trollrage myself. Well played. /b/ro

>>3823088
that's a penis

>>3823171
WFT?! Going to google that for sure.

you give me gore.....i'll give you a massacre

>>3823130

Just silkworm pupae.

I actually kind of enjoy them because they're byproducts of the silk industry, and well, that's efficiency at its finest.

They don't really taste like anything.

>>3823130

facepalm.jpg

If it's in a can, it is necessarily cooked. All food in metal cans is cooked in a steam autoclave right after the cans are filled. The food is cooked (sterilized) inside the can. That's why canned food doesn't go bad even though it isn't refrigerated--it's cooked sterile inside the can. All canned food is cooked.

>>3823110
That looks delicious, what's wrong with it?

>>3823267
I dont know about that, I have seen people open brains in milk gravy and those look pretty raw

>>3823284
i think lasagna is supposed to have cheese as a top later. somebody got lazy and forgot the cheese.

>>3823227
...the hell IS that?

>>3823284

>>3823301

She's Korean and it's obviously a dog's head.

>>3823306
we just called them mushrooms in the US

>>3823301
Matsutake mushroom.

>>3823306

>mfw britlanders call mushrooms "dog's heads"

>>3823298

[^_^]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=upxw2eiPQwU

>>3823594
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u4zw99VsoMA

>>3823176

Ha, I remember that video.

"SO GOOD."

>>3823654
>mfw imagining the high-pitched squeal of the cutlery scraping against each other

>>3823672

lol I heard it too

>>3823654
you're not a good person

>>3823638

Classic. Makes me proud to be amerifat.

>>3823988

>>3823988
These 50's/60's gelatin recipes are too much for me. I've seen tons of them posted here and I'm always horrified.

I don't understand what's so gross about chicken from a can.

Can someone enlighten me?

>>3823197

It's a shoop. Look at the edges.

>>3824120

I think the worst two things about it are the fact that it's a whole chicken and the gelatinous sauce/gravy that it's enveloped by. If it was dry, it would probably be a lot more appealing.

>>3824157
>imagining the sound as it slowly slides out of the can

>>3824159
>small drippy splats
>gloooooooop
>SPLAT

>>3824204

>>3824204
>>3824208

>>3823368
Grocery store I used to work in had pork brains and we used it as a hazing. Every stocker who worked there had to down a can raw. No one held it down but it was simply a matter of doing what you were fucking told. Didn't do it, you got crappy or no hours.

>>3824211
Gross.

>>3824209
>>3824208
>>3824204
What an I looking at here?

>>3824211

Bullllllllshit. No one thinks you're cool.

>>3824211
>hazing
>at a job

Are you fucking 16yo? Shit like that at a real job gets you fired. Grow up.

>>3824215
Milk steak, boiled over hard, with raw jellybeans.

>>3824215
Jelly Bellys with various cooked meat and milk.

>>3824229
>>3824229
>>3824229
>>3824229
>>3824229
>>3824229

>>3824211
canned pork brains are cooked, not raw.

>>3824211

>>3824211
>>3824211
Because your minimum wage job is oh so important...

>>3824282

He didn't mention if it was the canned variety.

>>3824291
Typical McDonald's sandwich right here.

Please. No more food gore. /ck/ is bad enough with people claiming to be "professional chefs" for the last 20 years, now food gore? Please no.

>>3824541
>Every stocker who worked there had to down a can raw.

>>3824211
I'll stock your ass with my foot.

Do you like my tongue?

>>3826199
oh dear god the misfortune of a person who had to eat that

>>3826204
They used gelatin in everything back then.

It was the asbestos of the food industry.

>>3826204
These were truly horrific times.

>>3826203

what the fuck is up with all these weird gelatin recipes?
people actually thought these were a good idea? and made them??

>>3826218
There is nothing wrong with this. Usually eaten either as slices on bread or by itself around here. It's savory, store brands are usually downright salty, and meaty.

>>3826240
You see, back in the '50s it was legal to lie to the consumer.

IT REALLY TASTES GREAT.

http://denbrunamaten.se/

Recipes from the 70's. It's all in Swedish, but they cook everything and show step-by-step pictures of the process and scans of the recipe cards, so I think the pictures speak for themselves.

And this is the last one.

>>3826244
MIX (if you can get ingredients canned then it's better)
>fruity gelatin
>bacon
>frankfurters
>spam
>cream
>pineapple
>cheese
>peas
>oranges

put it on some bread crust and add a little whipped cream to make it look "nice"

and you got yourself disgusting ol' murrrikan feast

man i'm glad i wasn't alive in the '50s. my parents would've made me eat potato salad suspended in jello for sure.

On the one hand I hate how wasteful modern food habits tend to be, yet on the other holy shit some of this food from even just as recent as the 50's looks disgusting.

>>3826207
at least asbestos had the decency to kill you after exposure

>>3826289
Well some of these of probably caused death by people vomiting out their guts.

>>3826296
i question their ability to successfully vomit something of this consistency. would you chew it on the way back up?

>>3826298
True. It probably just sits there, a big gelatinous cube settling in your belly to gradually dissolve over the next few months.

50's pls go

Holy fuck. Too early in the morning for me to feel this nauseated.

>>3826234
this is the only one I'm not grossed out by, evaporated milk is a great additive to hamburgers and meatloaves.

Where's the blog of the girl who tried cooking all these aspic monstrosities?

Has anyone ever had one of these? I don't know where this is local to (I assume the south) but I do know it was a big staple for the US military (most branches) when my dad was in the navy. He loved that shit and I couldn't figure why.

Im trying to eat oatmeal while browsing this thread. I want to hurl right now.

I was getting pretty good at doing the gummi bear recipe from the simple cooking channel on youtube, but now I cant even look at Jello without imaging various meats and cheeses trapped inside of it like an ancient amber preserved mosquito, jiggling its metronome against the harmony of nature.

This is the kind of shit you dedicate to Nurgle.

>>3826508
Eh, shit on a shingle is just a poor man's biscuit and gravy (which is poor man's food to begin with). It's ugly, but it tastes good as long as you don't fuck up the gravy.

>>3826508
My mom made that once in a while, it was okay, but I haven't had it in decades.

Thankyou to whoever was posting all of those pictures from the 50's!

What was up with the obsession of serving everything over a bed of lettuce? Anybody know?

>>3826508
chipped beef, and its actually pretty good on toast. It sure as hell gives you enough energy to wake up and shoot things.

>>3826561

I'd guess the allure was how "space-age" it seems. Why have a traditional meal when you can have a conversation piece? Some of them sound so wretched that I'm tempted to make them and serve them to my family with a straight face.

Gotta love the old-school Patriarchy in some of them too. "John's got a war job - John JUNIOR needs to grow straight and sturdy - and this woman's job is keeping her family healthy!"

Goddamn straight. Get back in the kitchen and crank out more of your disgusting Gelatins, wife.

The lettuce thing? I dunno. It's green and that used to mean it was healthy.

>>3826561
It's no different than the hacks today using sauce smears and ridiculous dishes to present.
Fads come and go.

>>3826590

> sauce smears

Seriously, that and "foams" just need to go away.

>>3823071
why isnt this posted yet

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gP74xUyYaoo

>>3826568
THIS

Chipped Beef is Gourmand-Tier
Eat it 8 to 9 times a year if not more.
Don't know why more people don't eat it, when they eat sausage gravy, it's the same concept, cooked meat in a bechamel sauce.

How has this channel not yet been posted?
https://www.youtube.com/user/HowToBasic

>>3826249

>tuna and cottage cheese

Yummy

>IN LIME JELLY
How did anybody even survive to breed?

"Deep Fried Tootsie Roll On A Stick"

This entire thread, I was just about to make lunch when curiosity got the best of me and I opened this thread.

Doritos Consomme

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cppOojKBNko

Lime Gelatin

>>3826650
That shit's good

>>3823197
>>3823171

Googled "Blue Waffles".....huh, it's not exactly what I was looking for......

>>3826614
A "gourmand" is a glutton. You're thinking of "gourmet".

Eating lard with a spoon is "Gourmand-Tier".

>>3826561
It's just a garnish. They use it for the photo op, but I doubt housewives serve dinner on a bed of lettuce.

see the difference in presentation between the magazine and real life in >>3826215

>>3826715
> Eating lard with a spoon is "Gourmand-Tier".
Now you're stretching the definition, a gourmand is still a gourmet.

>>3826738
>Cold, unmelted butter on bread

>>3826744
>implying that pic didn't give you a boner in your mouth

>>3826744
>preferring melted butter

wat

>>3826744
thats sort of the idea there ... why would you put warm, melted butter on untoasted bread??

>>3826749
Well, I guess my tongue did harden a bit when the rigor mortis set in.

>>3826744
I like scraping bread sticks across cold butter, myself. Probably due to childhood food crimes.

Jesus - we need a mixed drink recipe thread after scrolling through this nightmare.

>>3826561
You're welcome. It sure is nice coming back to see all this nausea.
Here's one I forgot.

>>3826871
sounds pretty good aside from it being topped with bacon.
spinach peas and corn.

>Flying Jacob (Swedish: Flygande Jacob) is a Swedish casserole based on chicken with bananas, peanuts and bacon and cooked in the oven.

>>3826897
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OvW2xeSn4As

Relevant.

I love how people always respond so poorly to the Jell-O recipes posted in these threads. Granted, some of them are pretty much terrible ideas, but aspics are considered a totally normal, and often gourmet, food world wide.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Aspic

>>3827129
Because it looks absolutely horrendous. It could taste fantastic but if it looks like shit people won't want to eat it.

>>3826185
I just fucking love to carve little flowers into my vegetables on my really busy days.

>>3827139
Well yeah, shit like that looks terrible. But shit like this looks totally edible and even delicious.

>>3827147
I dunno man. Just thinking about aspic makes me think of cold boiled eggs. A chilled, meaty slime. Not something you can comfortably chew, yet not something you swallow whole either.
Just makes unpleasant thoughts. Not something I'd associated with quality.

>>3823171
That photoshop is terrible, you missed the edges

>>3826219
Delicious pea soup.

>>3827211
>1 and 1/2 hours in the kitchen
>chicken is barely cooked

The fuck was he doing the entire time?

>>3826233
Not going to lie, I would eat this. Beans and eggs!

>>3827129
No. No one likes that shit.

Cool troll wiki though, dumbfuck.

>>3826918
would fuck him. god. so hard. my boner. fucking. christ he's so hot. ass babies.

>>3826918
my god.
he's actually the hottest guy I've ever seen.
ever.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ymkgY4b8-n8&list=UUfLGZs8bSDbkNJjCRIE7NSg&index=2&feature
=plcp

>>3827339
Never in my fucking life have I heard someone say "I love aspic(s)" let alone "I like aspic(s)".

Some of the stuff in here looks pretty good if I'm feeling in a daring, gorge on anything mood but all the 50s gelatin shit is totally unappealing. Why did people think fruit goes on every dish? Some fruits are better than others when mixed with meats like pineapples but if you put GRAPES in any non-desert dish you're a fucking asshole.

>>3827129
>>3827147

that looks terrible. also i've never, EVER seen aspic in real life. i thought it was dismissed as an old-timey quirk. not sure where you're finding michelin restaurants serving aspic.

>>3826508
My grandma always made SOS for me. I fucking loved it.

>>3827147
That looks disgusting.

>>3828519
>>3829238
Pathetic faggots.

>>3827211
>eww tomato

What is wrong with tomate you fucking cunts?

It's good to prevent prostate cancer, meaning the doctor wont stick his finger up my ass.

>>3827471
I have. Only Andrew Zimmern though. And I agree, sometimes at least. For some odd exotic shit like Gefilte fish and (being a PA boy) cold pickled pig trotters, the aspic that naturally forms around the food is considered an essential part of the dish itself. Maybe it's the good ol' Amish food heritage of the area I grew up in, but reproducing that slick, gelatinous texture in a way that showcases the flavors of a classic dish sounds like a grand idea to me. Most of the Jell-O brand food gore recipes look disgusting because they're just "throw shit in unflavored gelatin", but if someone were to (and this is total top-of-my-head bullshit), make a mild nori flavored aspic, suspend fish roe within it, and serve it in slices over sushi rice, I personally think it would be a better way to not overpower the flavor of my favorite sushi protein while enhancing the texture (the fresh, firm graininess of the roe against the creamy rice and slick, gooey aspic)


In fact, this food gore thread, I believe, just gave me an excellent idea... inspiration comes from the weirdest places

>>3829782
Headcheese sounds nice but anything else..nah brah.
Meat should be served warm unless it's a fucking sandwich.

>>3829315
I hate girls who hate tomatoes.

That is all.

Jesus christ these vintage recipes

it's like they hate food

>>3829260
No one likes that shit but you, dickface.

>>3824229

>at a real job

Dude, he worked at a grocery store, he probably was 16.

>>3823638
>>3823638
>>3823638

Dear fucking christ. Why? Who makes pasta salad with condensed milk and mayo? Fuck.

My god, I should take pictures and post the shit my roommate makes in these threads.

Scrambled eggs and peanut butter topped with pepperjack on a tortilla...

Sometimes he uses Nutella though.

>>3830263
A really fat ameritard.

>>3830134
I hate the texture not the taste
>>3829315
You still get fingers in your ass to check your prostate you fool.

Home made pizza

>>3830338
Damn that looks so good

p-please. No more.

>>3826744

Implying the fact that it's margarine isn't more nauseating.

>>3832159

Are you me circa 4am yesterday morning?

Don't call OR text her.

>>3832131
>dat jew hair
>dat jew nose
>dat jew complexion

Eurofag here.

Tacos aren't very popular here. Decided to try and make some to see why Americans like them so much. How did I do ?

First time making tacos.

I am a girl btw ;)

>>3832240
Definitely belongs in this thread.

>>3832240
8/10.

>>3832240
ALL MY WHY

This belongs in that food gore thread. You did terrible. You should feel bad.

>>3826187
>>3826199
Fucking gross

>>3826508
SOS is god tier, I don't know what's in that gravy, but if it's ham, that would be great. Sausage gravy is all I ever had.

>>3826650
Holy fuck, I want it.

>>3826738
Looks good. would eat.

>>3832253
I'm going to puke.

>>3832265
For some reason this made me laugh.
>average meal for old people

>>3832292

Green ham (?) looks nasty, but I'd eat those eggs.

>>3826218
>>3826218
>>3826218


great god I am laughing so hard at that

I'm drinking and this thread is helping me define how much of an iron stomach i have. Especially considering i'm drinking white rum mixed with walmart brand margarita mix. The most disgusting thing is the breathing pattern of the morbidly obese people in the videos

>>3826221
That reminds me of the Black Books episode where they end up opening a restaurant in the store and Bernard demands Manny makes soup in a tower.

those old recipe aren't as bad as your trying to force it. It's mostyl bad photos with saturation fuck up.
in before baseless kid excuse like

>b.b.but jelly is ugly it's bad!
>b.b.but processed food is bad!
>b.b.but you aren't allowed to cook those ingredients together!

and other shit like that.

>>3832265
>the average meal of someone who just had their wisdom teeth pulled out

>>3832265
dat lemon

>>3824289
oh fucking hell lol

>>3832348
Overly processed food is bad. Why not eat whole foods - they taste better, are typically more nutritious, and have millions of years of co-evolution to back them up.

Oh yeah, the recent history of fatty eating is more credible.

>>3826243
Your culture is disgusting. Fuck you.

>>3832906
are you supposed to be using the internet without your mom's supervision? Maybe you should go outside and play with your friends.

>>3832159
But that's delicious. The fuck are you doing.

>>3832314
You must have had the shittiest childhood.

>>3832928
Nice assumption there asswipe.

>>3826183
i don't see what's wrong with it..

>>3823284
You mean aside from it tasting like sauce and cheese on a block of chalk?

Nothing. Nothing is wrong at all.

>>3826205
I think that ad meant "Meatloaf looks like it's been 'cum on' when you add Miracle Whip!"

>>3826221
>Goatse: The Dinner

>>3826508
Shit on a shingle is fucking delicious.

I will never understand why /ck/ is so fucking pretentious all the time. (not you)

It doesn't matter if something tastes good, /ck/ will shit all over it if it's easy to make or doesn't have a foreign sounding name.

>frites.. not fries. you fucking pled.
Typical /ck/

>>3832291
Proper Shit on a Shingle is Creamed Chipped Beef

>>3833212
pleb too. fucking too tired for this shit. i'm out.

>>3823071
Here is your chicken in action:


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gP74xUyYaoo#t=48s

>>3826871
Oh god, my grandmother makes EXACTLY that.
Bacon and everything.