/ck/ - Food & Cooking

>>18387415
qrd?

>go to a restaurant
>ask for something thats not on the menu
who does this?

>>18387420
No I'm good thanks, e-celebs don't interest me and neither does the Marco poster.

>>18387420
Why do zoomies not read the thread

>>18387422
I do it all the time, good way to impress a date
>I'll have calamari
>We don't serve that, sorry
>Don't you have any squid at all?
Instant panty dropper, they fear my power

>>18387422
There are a few types:

>crusty old white guys who don't understand why you don't offer a baked potato
>black people who then also ask for to-go silverware to eat their food
>dumb fuck shark-tank-types who think the world is at their beck and call, you just gotta DEMAND IT
>moms who let their shitty ass kids dictate the entire meal. "don't you just have like, spaghetti and butter?"

>>18387436
>black people who then also ask for to-go silverware to eat their food

>>18387436
>moms who let their shitty ass kids dictate the entire meal. "don't you just have like, spaghetti and butter?"
I hate this one, bitch cheap for a babysitter so she drag her kids who she raised like shit along. And on that note I don't get what parents' problem with feeding their kids actual dishes instead of weird "picky child food" is.
t. Ate ketchup sandwiches and spaghetti with butter as a kid

>>18387420
It's pretty simple really
>Customer asks for chips
>Hand-cuts and personally cooks the chips
>Charges the customer £25 for his time
In the end, he did nothing wrong.

>>18387422
happens all the time, the restaurants I've worked at always had old fucks and bogans insisting we serve them fish and chips, chicken parma or a burger

>>18387436
Everywhere has a spaghetti and cream sauce of some sort. Guess what that is? Spaghetti and butter. Just hold the scoop of bullshit that you mixed nine hours ago that you were gonna sprinkle about the plate.

Most restaurants are open to the idea to make you a custom meal if they have the ingredients. Its service, not an industrial kitchen or street food. I have my own recipe at one, they put it on the menu after a couple months because the chef liked it.

>>18387415
I'd pay the 25 if it was good. Nowhere can cook chips anymore they're always undercooked or soggy. Everyone is just dumb now.

>>18387415
Whenever Marco Pierre White comes on the telly my mum gushes about how sexy she thinks he is.

>>18389689
If MPW cooked me fries, especially depending on when in his career, I would hope it would be some of the best fries ever, and I would be excited for the opportunity.

Most people have had fries from a fairly large amount of restaurants, so you would have a good reference to base his cooking off of.

>Hand-cuts and personally cooks the chips

so he didn't even pop em in the freezer for a few hours after the first fry? those must've been some limp, soggy-ass pathetic excuses for french fries. poor customer got shafted, i wouldn't have paid

>>18389721
Yeah but how does he use knorr stock to season it?

>>18389764
The only chance to have ever asked him for fries was before knorr, marcolet.

Marco was in Banff, Canda at the time. He called my chopping skills sub-par. I made sure there was no salted butter and virgin olive olive oil the whole night, Fuck you Marco. Your son is a discrace.

>>18389787

What do you expect when his dad is clearly mentally ill and cared far more about impressing a tire company to relieve the unprocessed pain of losing his mother than he ever did about the kids he never wanted in the first place?

>>18389779
I wouldnt ask him anything,he would tell anyway

>>18389803
At that point it was really your choice.

>>18387420
He means fries but he's British so they were cursed to used weird mixed up language where fries are chips, chips are crisps, cookies are biscuits, and biscuits are scones.

>>18389845
Look it's simple alright, fries are chips, crisps are chips, cookies are a subset of biscuits and scones are scones

>>18389845
>It's another ESL amerigolem can't understand English episode

>>18389704
If she sucks his knob it's her choice, there's no real recipe

>>18389745
Wait what

>>18389898
Where does the 'f' sound come from in Lieutenant? I'm genuinely curious to learn how inbred English people justify their arbitrary bullshit lol

>>18391304
The leftenant was the only thing left after action

>>18387415
It was entirely your choice to order them.

>>18391304
it comes from from french military ranks. lieu-tenant roughly means area-holding. as in the lieutenant is standing in for some superior in a command. basically it came into english pronounciation as LEF-tenant, and then gets further simplified down to loo-tenant. google french pronunciation it'll make a bit more sense

>>18391304
English people pronouncing bouillabaisse confuses me more. “Booya-base”?

>>18389787
which restraint was this?

>>18389721
why would you hope its best fries ever? its basic bitch food theres nothing intricate or technical about it.

it's like expecting a boiled egg to be better than yours because some chef made it.

dumb

>>18387415
stock pot

>>18392361
>Like a boiled egg

You called it. You are dumb.

I think the most egregious thing i did was charge a woman with celiac disease $50 to scrub down my line to prevent any gluten contamination mid service holding back diners chits 10 minutes.

>>18387422
>>18387436
Why would you go to a restaurant to order food with 2 ingredients? If you're going to eat out you'd want something you can't just whip up t home, right?

>>18389689
>>18389704
>>18389721
He would use a Knorr® seasoning paste to make it taste better.

>>18387415
Of course he did nothing wrong. It was the customers choice

>>18392715
I dont think he was working in restaurants when he got his deal with knorr. Maybe at the yew tree inn...

https://youtu.be/_2kIO80tAfU

>>18392741
>seasoning chicken with chicken
why did he do it?

>>18392760
Two reasons:

1. It was his choice
2. He was paid to do it.

>>18387415
Absolute legend t 15 years of chefdom

>>18389926
kek

>>18387420
>Customer asks for chips
>Hand-cuts and personally cooks the chips
>Charges the customer £25 for his time
Implied by OP Marco did nothing wrong.

>>18391858
>basically it came into english pronounciation as LEF-tenant
Yeah, but why? Frenchfags don't pronounce it with an 'f'.

>>18394549
according to wikipedia it's disputed but there might have been old frenchfags who pronounced it lieuvvv or lieufff

>>18387415
>“So this man asked to see me and said, ‘I always choose my own cheese.’

>“I said to him, ‘We don’t do it like that in Harvey’s, we do a plate of cheeses’.

>“He said, ‘Well I don’t like three of them’. “So I turned around and said ‘Four of them should be a sufficient portion sir’. “He said it again, ‘Well I always choose my own cheese’. I said, ‘I’m sorry we don’t do that here.’

>“He said it a third time and I said, ‘Sir why don’t you just f**k off and take your friends with you, goodnight sir, bye, bye.’

>“Then I left. The reality is they spoiled their own evening.

>>18394549
They all talk as if their mouths are filled with mashed potatoes, hearing an F lisped in there was understandable.

>>18391215
Good fries are double fried with a cooking off period in between. Often they're completely frozen.
Gives you a more tender inside while also a crispier outside.
Trying to fry them from raw like that doesn't work out too well at getting a non-greasy and crispy fry.

>>18395418
no need to freeze them. you put those cunts in water after the initial fry and put them in the fridge. then you deep fry em out of the bucket simple as

>>18387415
This guy sells pots. He doesn't cook anything.

>>18387422
I do, but I tip if I do(I don't usually tip, americans you can stop clapping now)

>>18387422
https://cleanplatter.wordpress.com/2011/09/18/the-taste-of-disillusionment/

> But Alton went on to tell a story about how he and his wife were in North Carolina, and they were at a seaside restaurant that had recently revamped its menu such that it no longer included hush puppies. “And my baby wanted hush puppies,” Alton said. So he ordered some.
> “I’m sorry, sir; those aren’t on the menu,” said the server.
> ”They are so on the menu,” Alton (said that he) said. “Your catfish, here, is rolled in cornmeal. Your fried chicken is soaked in buttermilk. Your french fries are made in a deep-fat fryer. Combine the cornmeal and the buttermilk, make them in to balls, fry them, and serve them to my wife.”

Could he be any more based?

>>18396535
I would possibly kick someone out for doing that if we were super busy. If it was a slow day I'd probably do it, but over charge wildly like marco did.

>>18396535
>dude take some of your buttermilk marinade that's contaminated with raw chicken and put it into the breading for the catfish
>muh wife
retard

>>18389594
>I have my own recipe at one, they put it on the menu after a couple months because the chef liked it.
"Oh God that retard who always asks for substitutions is back. Quick, give him the fake menu so he doesn't whine."

>>18396535
Lmao yeah Alton Brown does absolutely seem like the sort of guy to do that. Still a dick move though, especially if they're busy.

>>18396535
here in australia, any waiter would just say "sorry sir, if its not on the menu, you cant order it" and ask him to select something on the menu. if he said "ill speak to the manager" or "ill speak to the chef" or some shit like that he would just be told the same thing: pick something on the menu or leave.

>>18396535
In a more civilized society they'd have the right to kill Alton for this.

>>18397176
>adding 3 slices of ham and a little green onion to the filled breasts demands a fake menu
You know nothing

>>18396535

>my baby

Note how the goblin inserted herself into his pandemic videos when he didn't have a production team to tell her to fuck off?

>>18397299
They might have the right to try.

>>18387415
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FGBaZjlhHzA

ITT: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6wtfNE4z6a8

>>18389594
Don't most restaurants do most of the cooking before opening?

>*gentle sigh* “Now. As my dear old mother used to say, ‘if you don’t hand cut your chips, how can you expect perfection.’ In the pan goes some oleevoil. Nice little glug. Next get your potatoes. If you don’t want the effort, just get a takeaway yeah? It’s quite simple really, just let the knife, slice into the potato’s flesh, and silence any resistance with a firm palm. Next add your water. What I like to do is crumble a little of this knorr stock cube. It really packs the chips full of flavour, and remember this is much faster than boiling your own stock.”

>>18398306
Depends on the dish.
Stews and slow roasts can be done ahead of time and reheated pretty well of course. And many vegetables can be at least par cooked. But most else needs to be done to order.