/ck/ - Food & Cooking

if a restaurant has more than 5 or more options they're just a sodexo reseller

>>17912134
Imagine needing menus. I get the same thing from the same restaurant everytime

>>17912134
>burgers and sandwiches don’t automatically come with fries or house made potato chips
Is there a more blatant cash grab on any menu?

>slay queen

>>17912134
No alcohol

>any item or meal described using the word "crave", especially made up crap like "craveable" or "craveworthy"
>same with anything with -tastic or -licious added to the name
>anything that tries to puff up basic foods and procedures with pretentious garbage like calling the meat station at a shitty buffet "The Carvery" or calling it "creamery butter" as if it might be confused with butter from a machine shop or tailor.
>any place with the tag line ": A Place For ___________" as in The Cakery: A Place For Cakes.

>italian restaurant, go inside
>"wdym kebab meat goes on the pizza?"

>prices in the format "6.5"
>dish descriptions in the format "Pork chop: local greens, mashed St. Rutheford potato, Snake sauce

>waitress winces when I tell her she's pretty
Immediately leave. If she can't pretend to be charmed by me there's no point being there.

>>17912134
>catering to 0.1% of people that become an hero 47% of the time

>>17912139
This is such a based comment.
You get it.


Fuck all chinese restaurants that just reheat sysco foods too

>>17912240
Ah yes, the "pretend fine dining" restaurant

>>17912134
>menu refers to sandwiches as "sammies"

>>17912134

>>17912134
>small children allowed inside

>>17912134
>restaurant advertises authentic ethnic cuisine
>most of the patrons are white
That's a no from me. Seth thinks so too (webm related)

>>17912134
>side-baes

>>17912134
>Non-Judgmental Lentil
>Slay queen.
>Vegan (yes, really!)
I cannot wrap my head around virtue-signaling npc behavior. When I was young, this sort of shit made people want to shun your for being an attention whore.

>>17912134
>in-house bbq sauce
>our famous fries
>from the garden
>fish of the day
>artisan bread
>manager's special

>>17912134
Hi anons. How about a green flag for positivity?

>when the waitress asks if everything is OK, but then realizes I'm just struggling to be out in public. She then tells me to take my time and that everything is gonna be OK. She sits next to me and shows me a couple of menu items she thinks I'll like, which I pick. She giggles as I clap my hands to celebrate making my order. At the end of the meal, she smiles at me and I clap my hands again. My counsellor pays the bill and I make one last eye contact with her as he leads me out of the restaurant

>>17912669
>t. downie

>>17912134
>getting upset at how appetizers are labeled to the point of deciding the restaurant is bad
It must be terrible living with autism.

>>17912232
>implying those pizza/pasta/sandwich joints run by habib’s don’t make a fucking awesome kebab pizza

>>17912139
>have various ingredients
>can’t make more than 5 things with them
The fucking Sodexo/Sysco meme is getting out of hand with you retards.

>>17912134
I won't eat anywhere that describes dishes as 'dirty', like dirty fries and dirty burgers.

If the foods have gay names like "Sailor Joes Badass Bowl-O-Awesome" then I'm not going there, simple as.

>>17913594
So you have issue with “General Tso’s chicken”?

>The restaurant has cringe nicknames for all their shit
>waiter forces you to say the cringe name otherwise he won't accept your order

>>17913604
I would have an issue with General Tsos Badass Bowl-O-Awesome, yes.

>>17913622
>waiter forces you to say the cringe name otherwise he won't accept your order
This literally doesn’t happen.

>>17913590
no bojangles dirty rice?

>>17912241
you are ugly and you know it

>>17912669
anon how old are you?

>>17912160
Equal Opportunity (for jews)

>>17912134
>Has any Michelin Star
>”Celebrity chef” owned like by Gordon Ramsey, Alain Ducasse, Jiro Ono, etc

>>17913732
0/10

>>17912140
>Dude I have so much fun trying out new cuisines
Do americans really eat the same shit over and over again like brainwashed monkeys?

>>17913567
How many restaurants are going full Cheesecake Factory and making 1000 variations of the same ingredients to hit that number. And how many are buying whatever premade kit meals distributors are selling to hit those numbers?

>>17912134
Fusion Food, Novelty foods
Sriracha, hot sauce, ranch etc
All you can eat buffets
Redneck crap like blooming onion
Supersized stuff
Themed dish names

>>17913753
Not bait

>>17912134
yeah lemme get the piss

>>17912134
>Chicken dish named "What the cluck" or any other cluck pun.
>Vladimir poutine
>Crispy coating for chicken is something like corn flakes

>>17912210
>anything that tries to puff up basic foods and procedures with pretentious garbage like calling the meat station at a shitty buffet "The Carvery" or calling it "creamery butter" as if it might be confused with butter from a machine shop or tailor.

i hate this fucking shit, or saying fresh
>our burger is made with fresh beef, fresh lettuce, fresh tomato...
im paying 15+ bucks for this shit, it better be fresh

When their website isn’t protected and has ads. I went to the site of a mom and pop place before it closed and the sidebar ads were straight up porn lol

>>17912455
>fish of the day
reminds me when i worked at a sports bar we had a soup du jour that was always the same, i think the owner thought soup du jour was another name for french onion

>>17914028
>When their website isn’t protected and has ads. I went to the site of a mom and pop place before it closed and the sidebar ads were straight up porn lol

its called soul, anon.

>>17914021
“Carvery” is literally the term for it if someone is actually there slicing the meat for you.

>>17914028
Thats soulful.

>>17912240
>>dish descriptions in the format "Pork chop: local greens, mashed St. Rutheford potato, Snake sauce
this is mile better that
>owner grandma's signature extra moist extra tangy key lime pie with farmer Mark's limes and house-made muscovado crumble-angel sponge cake base
I remembber the moment when menues were twee pop level of food blog cute life stories about garlic bread bring the memories of yadda-yadda

>>17912433
>wearing hats inside
>wearing hats at table

>>17913994
But anon bloomin onions are good and they are an Outback original.

>Surly staff
>dirty floors
>dirty restrooms
>Stupid names for dishes
I haven’t been to a fast casual restaurant in a long time—Chili’s, Max and Ermas, Friday’s, Ruby Tuesday’s, Apple Bees, etc. but I can remember a time in the 90s when they all had stupid names for pretty uninteresting food…e.g. tingly wingy pizza poppers, poppin pizzadillas, sum yung dum fuk, the list goes on

>>17913758
>americans
...who said anything about americans? you're weird and obsessed

>>17913758
yes they rlly do
>>17914427
because it's always ameritards with their awful takes on food lol

>>17912134
there's absolutely no fucking way this is real and wasn't made by some baitor

>thai restaurant
>only thai food is curry and pad Thai
I'm done with thai restaurants they are so americanized to shit it's a goddamn crime

>>17916289
Then move somewhere with a local Thai population.
Restaurants are going to sell what people buy. I can get fried pork intestines at a local Thai place. But that’s because it here are enough actual Thai here to offer it.

>>17912257
Rent free

>>17912134
How about if homeless people, stray animals and local children keep disappearing near the restaurant and they never seem to get meat deliveries? That'd be a definite probably not for me.

>>17916030
Probably, but I could easily see this being a real place in Chicago or Baltimore suburbs

>>17916481
I was going to say Seattle or somewhere in the NW

>>17912433
honestly I've been to some pretty fucking garbage chinese places frequented by actual chinese people, a lot of them go there for the "community" and tradition.

>>17916489
Seattle restaurants are required by law to have at least one teriyaki item

>>17912134
A restaurant in the mall near me has a menu that is like, 8 double sided pages. Despite this all of the food is really good. I think I found an anomaly.

>>17916354
Dilating make you that cranky?

>>17912134
if the restaurant is anything but mediterranean

>>17916328
I live in a big city I thought there would be decent thai food by default. I haven't tried everywhere I guess I will keep looking

>>17914160
Goyblabber

>>17916627
If your city has a decent number of Asian immigrants, then you should be able to find some good stuff.
Just look in “lower rent” areas, and “neighboring country” restaurants should be fine because overlap. My favorite “Thai” restaurant where I currently live is actually a Lao place.

>>17913758
Cope

>>17916513
what are some authentic med restaurants out there? never been to one

>>17912134
>"Tapas"
>"Mains"
>Can only access menu through a (((qr))) code
Any one of those will make me get up and go to another restaurant