/ck/ - Food & Cooking

imitation crab and laxatives

definitely not fucking ritz crackers. gotta have nuts though homie.

>>16275435
Ham(s), salami, assorted cooked wurst, cherry tomatoes, grapes, raspberries if fresh and firm, tapenades, sweet whipped cream.

>>16275435
Norwegian crispbread. Tyrol speck. Prosciutto. Colby jack. Gruyere. Kielbasa sausage.

>>16275482
>sweet whipped cream.
Why.....
Nationality?

cherry tomatoes are a must in any charcuterie board for me
if i have a blue cheese, i almays have some jam or fruit preserve
i'm not a fan of fresh or dried fruits, but dried mango strips are good vessels for spreading cheese on, if you have a brie or camembert or some spreadable cheese
nuts don't really do it for me, haven't found a pairing i like.
as for meat, i some salami and a dried meat are good on any charcuterie board i think. i don't like prosciutto myself, any prosciutto i've tried has a very raw edge to it, just reminds me of raw pork. any type of dry cured pork shoulder like coppa doesn't seem to have that problem for me, so i go with that.
i like the idea of using olives but it never works out well to my taste, olives are salty so they're not a good pairing for cheeses in my opinion. i guess it'd be fine for mozzarella maybe?
crackers are good as long as they're not too salty and not too thick. i prefer bread but unfortunately it makes you too full in my opinion.

a bunch of random snacks doesn't become a dinner just because you put it on a piece of wood

>>16275633
Charcuterie was never meant to be a dinner tard

I personally like nice soft crackers and a sweet jam or compote of some sort, some sort of aged salty ham, and chicken or pork liver mousse/pate.

Also cornichons for crunch.

>>16275621
You sound like a working class chump. I bet you thought it would be a great "investment", how you would wake up to a warm, healthy breakfast to start off your long day. Maybe, you even had a couple thoughts about all the other nifty little uses you could find for the thing, how it would help you cook healthier meals in general, shed a couple pounds off the old gut, boost your confidence around work and with the ladies. Yeah, maybe that slow cooker would start your life cooking again, wouldn't it? I can see your strained hands holding the box and reading through it carefully at the store. A little bit pricey, but you're the type of guy who thinks everything is more than you can spend, aren't you. And look what happened to you. Look what the slow cooker did to you. Fucked you over, and made you clean it like a useless bitch. You don't even fucking like oatmeal. Piece of shit, you've been repeating those three words your whole life, haven't you. Yeah, how was work after that piece of shit fucked you over? I bet it was on your mind the whole day, you probably didn't say shit to nobody. Can't be telling people about your mistakes. How your little fix yourself plan, failed you. Don't want people to start thinking you're the failure. You're the piece of shit, all along. You don't want that do you? You don't want to be the piece of shit everybody secretly whispers about, do you? Was your father a piece of shit like you? I bet he never had a slow cooker. He had a woman, a house, a damn good job. I bet it's slow cooking you the fuck alive, isn't it. Comparing yourself to him. How one day when all the steam runs our of your life, you'll discover how you're nothing more than burnt shit to be scrapped off and thrown in the trash.

>>16275435
what's everything on that tray?

>>16275682
What's wrong anon?