/ck/ - Food & Cooking

I hate how people pretend that nutella is healthy spread and an alternative to peanut butter. nigger it's literally ferrero rocher filling. you're spreading candy on bread.

>>14977937
I'm going to go with pizza fans that refer to it as 'za or a pie.

The best food fans are burger fans that will only eat at a burger joint that sells beer.

>>14977937
bang seems pretty cancery but I feel like that towards anything mainstream....am I a hipster?

>>14977947
It's low GI though.

>>14977967
What's wrong with bang's?

>>14977978
based
>>14977973
t. Hamplanet

>>14977937

>>14977995
I only weigh 87kg though.

smoothies

>>14977937
bacon and sriracha have them beaten in spades.

>>14977937
starbucks drinkers are cancer I've had a few people tell me it's a fuckin status symbol (women) because I said it's overpriced.

>>14977937
/sip/ faggots can go to hell

>>14978031
It's not as overpriced as it was, seeing as how a big mac meal is nearly 10 dollars now. Only a retarded femoid would think a cuppa is a status symbol or care about status.

Hot sauce or bacon

>>1497793
>most obnoxious fanboys
>not pic related

>>14978073
Faygo only has a couple festivals for mouthbreathers every year. Nutella has its own full time faggy restaurant in new york city. https://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=nutella+

>>14978085
wrong link
https://youtu.be/kuzzzL_98H4

>>14977937
beyond meat

>>14978073
hey bro you dissing the family?

>>14977937
Wrong, the correct answer is "bread".

>>14977937
Why do you care what other people think? Why does their behaviour cause such seethage? Let them pump gallons of the stuff up their asses if they like. Has nothing to do with you.

that weeb tea with the marbles in it

>>14978213
Bread, cigars, whiskey, rolex watches, craft beers, veganism, keto dieting, "milk" made from alternatives like soy and almonds, "Gluten Free"... All of these things are fads pushed by business interests which then get taken over by hipsters and others who are then financially exploited.

A good cigar is a nice thing, but put that cigar in a wooden box made from blemish free teak and cedar woods, give the stogie a fancy paper and gold foil band and voila... You get to charge 20 times what it's actually worth. With bread, you do everything with as much difficulty as possible. You import wheat grinding stones from Nepal. You power them using either a state of the art windmill or perhaps a solar electric setup. If you situate the bakery or "exclusive milling operation" near a stream, well then you may it water powered. Using a pelton wheel and a 300 foot drop. Then you restrict yourself to one kind of each variety of grain you want to use in your bread. It has to be either absolutely local, meaning that it's been grown on the rooftop of the bakery, or come from the other side of the world, preferably hand tended by Crimean Yak farmers in their spare time. You get water from the melting glaciers. You use salt from Tibet. You do natural fermentation only. No commercial yeast allowed. You use wicker bannetons from Vietnam lined with muslin or flaxen cloth hand woven in France. A wood fired oven is an absolute must. And finally, you produce at a deficit. By this I mean, that if you think you could sell 100 loaves of bread in a day, you make only 95. This creates artificial scarcity.

In this manner, you can charge 15 dollars for a loaf of mediocre wheat bread and have the suckers who buy walk away whistling happily.

>>14977967
>I’m contrarian
Yeah, that’s 4chan dude

>>14978361
Shut the fuck up.

>>14978361

are you a baker anon? sounds like a good business model.

there's a local sourdough company near me that uses a "special" crystal. Water used for dough is passed over this crystal during breadmaking. This is important because the crystals "frequency" imbues the water with some kind of "magic". This spell then increases the price of the finished product by at least 20%.

>>14978448
Fuck me. i forgot the "crystal". What if I pass the water through a ceramic filter, which vibrates in sync with the heartbeat pregnant head baker's unborn child? 30%?

>>14978430
>Angery hipster baker detected.

Go drown in a vat of tapioca starch, you bearded cull.

>>14978048
LO-CARB MONSTER ENERGY ASSAULT ULTRA BLACK ZERO ULTRA REHAB ICED TEA JUICE MAXX MULE KHAOS PUNCH DRAGON

>>14977937
gadgetfags who cant shut up about thier sous vide or dehydrator setups

>>14978361

I'd buy it

Cumbucha

>>14978420
But I'm not contrarian.

>>14977937
Bacon, weirdly enough. I like bacon, it's a normal food, but there's just a certain type of fag who perpetually treats it like some hot new food trend that just got discovered and can't shut the fuck up about it

pb>nutella

>>14978006
As 110 cm

>>14977937
Steak 100%

Bacon
Wagyu beef
Lotus Biscoff
Craft beer

>>14977937
>orldayutella
WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS SUPPOSED TO MEAN?! IT DOESN'T SPELL ANYTHING

>>14979069
It's actually orlday, pig latin for dirl, which means a thrilling vibration. Notice the n in Nutella is black, contrary to the logo design that is being referenced in the other two words. This can be taken to be an emphasis of the color. So they want you to be filled with vibrations by blacks. It's everywhere.

>>14977937
Reminder to not buy Nutella, it uses palm oil which is responsible for the deforestation of the orangutan habitat.

>>14978564
That's an excellent technique. You just have to make sure that the head baker urinates in the same wheat field that is used to produce the flour each time a crescent moon occurs during the pregnancy. If that's the case I wouldn't see why you couldn't even add 35%

Louts flavored peanut butter

>>14977937
Communion wafers and easy cheese.

>>14978006
post body

>>14979274
Now for the tip

>>14977973
It most certainly is not

>>14978089
how do they make those fat chicks look skinny?

>>14978213
what is poolish and what difference does it make? Net search did not help at all.

>>14977947
who said it was healthy?

>>14977973
Jesus, as opposed to what, PURE SUGAR ?!

>>14977947
nobody said that racist fatty. eat less and exercise ffs

EZ

>>14977937
>food
>nutella
Pick one.

>200 calories for two measly tablespoons
Christ. Also:
>Palm oil outta the ass

>>14981961
Live a little.

>>14977947
>alternative
No, you have it with peanut butter
nice on pancakes too

>>14981971
You're not living a little by ingesting this oversweetend aroma based puree. Indulgence have higher standards.

>>14977937
>What food has the most obnoxious fanboys
For me it's the mcchicken