/ck/ - Food & Cooking

>>14954562
Lol covfefe

>>14954562
Grande mocha frappaccino por favor

>>14954562
Small caramel mocha please

>>14954562
What do i have to say for an unprotected quickie with the most beat-up barista in the store?

>>14954578
that would be with Chet. He served time in prison. Just say hi to him and wink, and have fun.

>>14954562
>Starbucks
>sells more sugar than coffee
>primary product: pumpkin-spice milkshakes for after Karen's morning yoga session
>no Italian barista would be caught dead here
>yet expects to you order using its meme fake-Italian marketing lingo

Shiggy diggy.

>>14954562

I'm rather glad that these coronavirus lockdowns and restrictions is fucking up the finances and employment of these worthless wagie losers and their pretentious establishments.

>>14954562
Obviously a fraud because she didn't start off with "add a shot of black".

>>14954597
I'll never understand the starbuck haters. you can get a quality cup of Jo there.. the water is SUPERIOR and the bean is good if not great, I only get dark.

I order simple things like black coffee or espresso. When I get a sweet drink, I don't add anything fancy. It's easy to order from Starbucks for me.

>>14954611
Dang.. now THAT is interesting!

>>14954608

/diy pls go

When I was a kid, and Starbucks was first expanding on the East coast in cities & towns where the only previous options for coffee were McDonald's, 7-Eleven, and Dunkin' Donuts, it actually seemed pretty hip, and we straight-edge teens felt like total badasses ordering the "red eye", i.e. drip coffee with shots of espresso.

>>14954624
Coffee stunts a child's growth. Post height.

>>14954629

Coffee was the least of our problems. The parents might have forced one square meal per day into us, but otherwise it was junk food. It's amazing the garbage that the human body can survive on, let alone grow on. As for coffee, the real question is why high-school classes started at 7:00am (or maybe earlier) when biology apparently says that growing teens naturally sleep later.

>>14954597
Shut the fuck up faggot I’ll slit you’re throat neck

>>14954629
>Coffee stunts a child's growth.
Source?

>>14954597
Idk what the deal is with American Starbucks. In Canada, we tend to just get normal coffee like any other place at Starbucks. I like a black pike place.

Only teenage girls tend to get the weird drinks.

>>14954681
My grandma.

>>14954629
>There is no evidence that coffee stunts a child's growth.[58]

>>14954609
you can buy their beans at the supermarket

>>14954609
>dark roast starbucks drinker
Your opinion is already invalid.

>>14954562
>spending money on coffee from a shitty chain
Who here /coffeeathome/?

>>14954562
I stopped going to Starbucks when they took away the self-serve milk and sugar station due to SARS2. Just get my cuppa joe at QuikTrip now.

>>14954732
>>14954712
well, i spend 3 hours there on a given day. laptop worker here.

>>14954562
One Big Oh-Pee Faggochino with to portions of cum

>>14954777
that's disgusting. you know there's a pandemic going on, right? you can make your own coffee right at home too

A few shots of espresso with a very small amount of steamed cream is very good. Avoid the espresso can pana there. It is just espresso and whipped cream

For those who frequent the NJ Turkpike service areas, there's something satisfying about defiantly marching past Starbucks down the stairs to Sunoco for a styrofoam pint of hour-old mudwater. It may be sloppa shit, but at least it's honest sloppa shit.

>>14954794
>you know there's a pandemic going on, right?
It only kills the obese and elderly.

>>14954808
you’re retarded if you genuinely believe that

>>14954816
You've never looked at any data if you don't

>>14954562
I wouldnt know because my local Starbucks closed down 12 years ago. The only Starbucks thats left in Australia are those near Asian tourist and foreign student hotspots. The average Australian buys coffee from independent cafes.

>>14954822
show me the data then

yeah give me a large coffee

I'm a pro

>>14954829
https://lmgtfy.app/?q=covid+comorbidity+data

>>14954826
There's a Starbucks in Mount Druitt.

>>14954806

By the way, once time I saw Jordan Schlansky in the Sunoco shop at the Thomas Edison service area. I told him how cool it was to meet him in person, but I didn't want to be a douche and bother him and ask him for photos or anything. He said, "Oh, like you're doing now?" I was taken aback, and all I could say was "Huh?" but he kept cutting me off and going "huh? huh? huh?" and closing his hand shut in front of my face. I walked away and continued with my shopping, and I heard him chuckle as I walked off. When I came to pay for my stuff up front I saw him trying to walk out the door with like fifteen S'mores Pop Tart packets in his hands without paying.

The girl at the counter was very nice about it and professional, and was like "Sir, you need to pay for those first." At first he kept speaking Italian and pretending not to understand English, but eventually turned back around and brought them to the counter.

When she took one of the Pop Tart packets and started scanning it multiple times, he stopped her and told her to scan them each individually "to prevent any electrical infetterence," and then turned around and winked at me. I don't even think that's a word. After she scanned each bar and put them in a bag and started to say the price, he kept interrupting her by yawning really loudly.

(Naturally, he didn't buy coffee from Starbucks either. As I was driving out, I saw him in the parking lot tending to an espresso machine strapped to the back of his Vespa.)

when I'm feeling a tad fartsy, I order my drink upside-down.

>>14954609
They burn the coffee beans. This is well known.

>>14954860

My coffee-connoisseur coworker used to call them "Charbucks".

>>14954629
I’m 6 3, nerd

europoors would never be able to finish this. used to work at starbucks and we called these "suicides"

>>14954888
L O N D O N
O
N
D
O
N

>>14954893
a girl named "Ashley" would be a sugar slut

>>14954829
>>14954833
43% of covid deaths in India are between 30 to 59 years old. Any one who unironically belives that these who are not obese and old doesn't die from covid is a fucking retarded cunt.

https://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/india/43-of-covid-19-deaths-in-india-in-30-59-yrs-age-band/articleshow/76882684.cms

>>14954913
*those

>>14954562
The pro move is to turn 360° and walk away

>>14954913
They're all real unhealthy there. Obesity isn't the only way to have frail health.

>>14954609
For simple drip coffee it's comically expensive, and outside of North America and a select few bits of Asia there isn't even a bean variety to justify the purchase.

>>14954893
How moon-faced is this bitch?

>>14954562
I never go there but when I do I always get the green tea latte. It's pretty good.

>>14954826
based, as always

I've always ordered my Starbucks™ coffee Tall® and Black®. So far, I don't think anyone has noticed that I'm not a pro consumer. I try to act like I'm in a hurry so they don't catch on. Very helpful article.

>>14955189
IIRC the order was just to see if starbucks would actually do it, since mobile orders aren't constrained by things like "can it actually be done" or "should it actually be done".

>>14954562
>Walk up to counter
>"I want that coffee"
>pay
>recieve coffee
Am I ordering like a shitter?

>>14954624
>the only previous options for coffee were McDonald's, 7-Eleven, and Dunkin' Donuts
didn't know things were this bad in the US

>>14954562
just a "large" coffee, please

>>14954893
damn, you got me. i guess ameripoors are superior after all

>>14954913
>India

>>14954913
Vegetarians and streetshitters, the pinnacle of health and hygiene

>>14954913
>india
yawn. take a civilized country (Denmark): 2.7% of deaths are <60 years old (19 cases), 0.01% are <50 years old (1 case).

>>14955506
The US is a shithole. It used to be nice, with great expanses of natural beauty and cities, but not anymore. Now it's sprawling metropolis/soulless suburban areas, razed earth monocrops dotted with strip malls and fast food, and some big patches of desert with military bases. Very sterile and ugly compared to 100 years ago. Not many coffee shop or restaurant choices in most of it. Too many, too expensive in the huge cities.

>>14955104
in what way were you hoping to achieve there?

>>14954629
I drank coffee since I was 10 and smoked since 12
I'm 6 foot, which is on the tall side in my country.

I have small pp tho

>>14955588
how small is your pp?

>>14955591
Around 5.6" bone pressed, 5.5/5.4 normal erection likewise.
Circumference is shitty. 4.4" if I understood how to use american units

>>14954562
I ask for a medium coffee and if they give me shit I mutter you're a nigger under my breath and still pay for it knowing they had to make out the ger at least.

>>14954562
I only drink black coffee, and only when I make it myself. But on the rare occasion I end up at a Starbucks because someone drags me there I always order a large black coffee. The cashier inevitably tries to clarify with their bullshit pasta names they use for everything, 'Did you mean a Verdi medium roast?' So I always have to correct them again, 'No, just a large black coffee.'

>>14954893
>5 splenda
>10 sugar
For what purpose?

>>14954893
This has to be ironic

grande white chocolate mocha frappachino pls

>>14954893
i dont want to finish that

>>14954826
flat white no sugar, yeah nah the small one thanks.

>>14955638
Why do you make up bullshit on the internet? I get a coffee from Starbucks every other day, just black, and they never bat an eye because most people just order normal coffee here kek. Unless your entire city is made up of teenage girls.

rate, hate, evaluate

Option A
>black coffee, I'll ask if they have a small pack of honey to mix in
Option B
>hot chocolate, if they ask if I want whip, I must say yes, if they don't, I take it as it comes
Option C
>Mint tea, leave the bag in until I'm done

Hey what's up man can I get like a medium light roast. Medium is cool if you're out right now. And if it's summer and I'm in there I would get one of their cold brews cause they taste like dark chocolate. The kroger I used to go to had a Starbucks in there so if it was in the morning while running errands that would be the only time I go

>>14955506
>didn't know things were this bad in the US

To clarify: Big cities and some college towns did have "proper" cafes/coffeehouses before the explosion of Starbucks and their ilk. But there is a lot of America outside of that. And when mentioning those major chains, I was specifically thinking of take-away coffee--which, I presume, accounts for the vast majority of Starbucks's business (despite the cafe seating for those few who want to sit around for five hours pretending to write a screenplay). This is an aspect of American coffee that Euros may not understand--the prevalence of coffee "to go".

But if you were willing to sit down and drink your coffee, then there always were plenty of options in America--especially diners, which were (and are, where they remain) maximum /comfy/. In fact, I should argue that the American diner is just as iconic in the coffee world as the European cafe. Whether you were sitting alone at the counter, or in a booth with a group of friends, it is perfectly acceptable to order coffee alone (which the waitress would periodically top up). Although... as long as you're there, why not enjoy a slice of cherry pie?

>>14954562
I'm glad that Starbucks went broke and gave up in my country.
Don't need that yank hipster shit here.

>>14954681
Not him but it's widely known.

>>14954651
no i'll slit YOUR throat neck

>>14954562
>Ill have a small coffee
>regular

>>14956224
>Although... as long as you're there, why not enjoy a slice of cherry pie?
I'd rather not, thank you

>>14954609
their water is from the local municipality, it's nothing special.

>>14956308
>le wrong decade
the pen would have rolled off the table and landed tip down, destroying the nib

>>14954578
Let me get that Brenda special with extra cottage cheese
>that'll be $19.50 plus tip

>>14956332
Stroke on, senile poster

>>14954816
It’s been rebunked, sorry the other anon is right

>>14956224
>>14956308
American diner coffee has never been good and never will.
>muh context
>muh social setting
You look like a sperg and your shit's all fucked up. It's watery shit.

>>14956311
its triple filtered, their water is fantastic for that reason alone. i have a big berkey in my house and i double filter my water.

>>14954867
Dangerously based

>how do you like your coffee
>sweet and ascwhite as possible
>what's your name sir
>Adolf
>ihr Kaffee is gratis mein Führer

>>14954562
>ordering coffee at starbucks

>>14955742
Australians have no culture other than the didgeridoodoo but they suddenly become pretentious faggits when it comes to coffee. Theyre the biggest espresso fags, its like no other type of coffee exists for them. I just want my cafeine hit from proud American drip coffee maker thank you. I worked in melbourne for a few months at an insurance agency and I felt like I was looked down by my whole office when brought in my Starbucks frappachino every morning. I even heard the arrogant smirks . I have to line up in the only Starbucks in that area of the city thats always filled with loud Asian tourists. I feel like the only white guy there. Fuck Melbourne

>>14955742
Australians have no culture other than the didgeridoodoo but they suddenly become pretentious faggits when it comes to coffee. Theyre the biggest espresso fags, its like no other type of coffee exists for them. I just want my cafeine hit from proud American drip coffee maker thank you. I worked in melbourne for a few months at an insurance agency and I felt like I was looked down by my whole office when brought in my Starbucks frappachino every morning. I even heard the arrogant smirks . I have to line up in the only Starbucks in that area of the city thats always filled with loud Asian tourists. Fuck Melbourne

>>14954754
I rarely if ever get coffee when I'm out but if I'm already spending 2-3 dollars on a 5 cent cup of coffee it might as well double as a dessert or something sweet. The same niggas complaining about starbucks are the type that will spend 4 dollars on a black coffee and a donut like that's any better and have no problem with coffee flavored candy or ice cream.

>>14955506
>"when I was a kid"

He just doesn't remember the coffee shops because he was just a kid. When I was 7 I didn't know what the fuck half of the places we went by were but there were plenty of coffee shops. This retard probably passed 5 of them to visit starbucks.

>>14955555
Right there used to not be deserts

>the only people who think the virus is fake, is some delusional far right idiots

Why? Whats the reason for faking the virus? Isn't the deep state ultra powerful? Why would they need to fake a virus to control us?

>>14954629
I'm 6'9"

I've been drinking coffee since i was 13. Have you tried not being a retarded manlet?

>>14955582
Yes.

last thing i ordered at a starbucks was some kind of iced coffee with tons of sugar. it was disgustingly sweet.

Ventile triple vanilla latte pls

>>14954893
>MOBILE<

I doubt it.

>>14956447
Some diner coffee is good. Most of the small coffee shops I've been to have been good. It's just that starbucks puts them all out of business because they can afford the prime locations.

>>14956447
I've had fantastic diner coffee. You're gonna act like you can make a definitive statement on an entire category of restaurant?

>>14957823
This. If you go to starbucks, you get a fllavored espresso drink with cream. Otherwise, there's no fucking point because you can brew the same shitty drip they serve at home.

>>14957815
I'm pretty sure Starbucks in Australia has no drip coffee.

>>14955555
checked and geriatricpilled

Give me a red eye.

Reminder that the majority of people who are at Starbucks just get normal coffee/espresso

>>14958174
IT WAS ME, BARRY
I SHIT YOUR PANTS

>>14954572
i feel like covfefe was a precursor to covid-19, was he trying to tell us something

>>14954686
Because american coffee drinkers make their coffee properly at home instead of buying it at shitbucks, unlike you

>>14958901
Actually I tend to make myself a pot in the morning, then go to my campus Starbucks and yet another to study with, since I don't have a travel mug on-hand all the time. You know, seeing as cafes exist for convenience?

>>14954562
Black coffee, no milk no sugar

>>14959128
Your coffee must be pretty shit if you can stand drinking starbucks right after it

>>14959156
Nah, I am just not very picky, and Starbucks us right beside my building. I've been told I make good coffee.

>>14959162
Apparently not

>>14959163
I don't understand what you find so offensive about other people enjoying things. Go outside, get some fresh air.

>>14959165
How much are you getting paid to make these posts?

>>14954893
What the heck is that, that's not a coffee that's a hot soft drink is there anything but sugar in that O.o

Why have sugar and Stevia in it, does it have Aspartam as well?

>14 common Starbucks terms that'll help you order like a pro

>>14959170
Nice deflection. It's not like I exclusively go to Starbucks. There's a Tim Hortons and a second cup nearby too.

>>14959179
Not a deflection. My point is that my drip machine with folgers makes the same quality coffee that you get at starbucks, except I don't pay $2 a cup for it. Because of that, I genuinely do not understand why anyone would buy anything other than their sugary and espresso drinks

>>14954893
>Stevia Monk Fart
kek

>>14954629
6'1 and I have been drinking coffee since 13.

>>14955623
You're average.

>be me
>go to Starbucks like 3 times a year when on business trips
>"what would you like hon"
>"Large regular coffee"
>immediately walk away to waiting area and ignore the barista's questions and wait for my large regular coffee
I refuse to use their gay ass lingo

>>14954597
Just order coffee and you'll get coffee, retard. Nobody is forcing you to get the mocca caramel latte supreme whatever the fuck.

>>14956246
So are most urban legends.

>>14959171
Not hot, cold brew over ice.

>>14954562
I used to work there... as far as I know, they still can't agree on the nomenclature of ice water. Luckily, most of the people I worked with weren't total robots, and could figure out that "Big fuckoff thing of water, with a bit of ice in it" was an iced venti light-ice water.

For me, it's a triple grande latte, or a grande dark roast, but only when being dragged to Starbucks, or knowing that I'll get the drink for free. Just about every actual cafe around here has better coffee and better service.

>>14960830
U didn't pay sir

I'm an adult & I like coffee so I make it at home. There is always coffee in the house so there is no need for me to get it anywhere else besides a local roaster & then I usually get something there. I still wonder who the hell thinks starbucks is expensive, I hear that shit & it makes no sense to me because whenever I used to go there I could literally pay for my coffee in change, unless you're getting some shit that is all flavoring & sugar it shouldn't be more than a dollar or two and if you can't afford that it doesn't mean starbucks is expensive, it means you are poor.

>>14954893
no doubt there's some self-important subculture of urbanites that spend their time trying to order the absolute worst drinks at starbucks money can buy.