/ck/ - Food & Cooking

>>14134730
Looks kinda uninspired, but I'd try the face invader and see what their fire flower is like.

3 orders of angry birds pls.

>>14134730
Hit me with an Angry Birds and a Teemon Special. Mountain Dew for the drink, obviously.

Honestly that menu could be way fucking worse, seems like decent flyover fare and if the prices correspond to dollars that's damn affordable

>waiter makes you watch an unskippable cut scene before you get your food.
>waiter interupts your meal with more unskippable cutscenes
>Waiter pushes you to buy the desert DLC.
>waiter gets butthurt when you don’t make micro transactions on their behalf

Had these guys at a smash tournament in florida.

>>14134770
I'm sorry we don't have any Mountain Dew. Can I interest you in a cocktail?

>>14134784
>you aren't allowed to enter the restaurant until you watch half a dozen videos of logos for the builder, electrician, the local government, the owner of the building and the manager in charge.

>>14134730
Seems like normal-ass bar food, probably tastes like normal-ass bar food, so it's probably ok. The original menu items like the pepperoni burger and the sushi fries sound like shit though.

>>14134829
I'll take a Friday thanks.

that's blatant copyright infringement for commercial purposes and I'll be alerting Nintendo to send them a cease and desist

fact: any business that gives their items retarded names is crippling itself as a large portion of the population who would eat there refuse to take part in the silliness

the worst offenders? when they are giving non-"signature" items the same treatment

The Funky Bunk "grilled steak, peppers, and onions covered in our special cheesy bunk sauce served on a hero roll"
oh so a cheese steak, got it, can I have a cheese steak then

sorry we don't have that, we have a FUNKY BUUUNK though!!

fuck off, I wont have anything then

>>14134899
that's like this burger place next to me that calls fries with bacon and blue cheese "stinky pig style". I have to say it out loud in public. please make mine stinky pig style

>>14134784
Except it's nintendo so almost none of that happened sony pony.

>>14134914
I have a place with an item called blue balls, and it's actually really good. Its little fried chicken nuggets full of ham and cheese and it comes with gravy and cranberry sauce to dip in

but they are called blue balls so nobody wants to order them. It's always a discussion about who's going to be the fool that asks the waitress for blue balls. And no matter how straight you play it they will always smirk at you when you say it
fuck them

>>14134751

>>14134795
Was the food good?

>>14134730
The RIP unironically sounds good

haha lol

>>14134914
I wonder if cold stone still has dumb names for the sizes of their ice cream. I haven't been there in long goddamn time, not since they stopped serving coconut ice cream. But I'm sure it's come and gone many times since then.

>>14134829
These seem like fair prices. I'll take an inception

>>14135002
we had a cold stone open up and everyone was pretty hype about it, I saw the sizes on the board and immediately turned 540 degrees and walked out
despite being popular right at the beginning they were closed by the end of the summer, and I have to believe the sizes were the reason since they were in a prime locations right next to the most popular pizzeria in town

>>14134899
this, it feels patronizing and dumb

>>14134918
>read dead
>nintendo
Everything but, friend

>>14134730
For me it's the Red Dead, always loved cowboy-style burgers.

>>14134730
>sit down
>waiter comes over and plops this on your gfs head
>"the fuck do yall want?"

>>14134730
> America
> Every day
> With or without Covid 19

>>14134784
>finishing your meal and then wrong warping through the bathroom door to get outside the restaurant without paying

Rest in Pepperonis and Sushi Fries, please.

>>14134899
It just depends on the name or theme they use. Look at McDonald's, they have names like Big Mac and Quarter Pounder but they're not so retarded that you can't tell off the bat what kind of burger it's supposed to be. Those work fine and nobody thinks it's retarded to say the names, meanwhile you go order that Gaymer Grub in the OP and you'd feel embarrassed even mouthing the words silently.

>>14134730
The red dead sounds like a good path to constipation and bowel adhesions.
>One please.

>>14134784
>Eating the meal consists of a series of quick time events
>You can't eat the meal unless your phone has the restaurant's app open
>When they update so much as a letter of their menu, you lose all your memories of ever having eaten at that restaurant
>The restaurant hires a group of 13 year old children who gather around your table as you eat and hurl insults about your mother

>>14135219
Ah yes, the Big Mac. the McFlurry. The Shamrock Shake. the McWrap.

I know what this is because it doesn't sound retarded and is descriptive, not because i've had it drilled into me by years of advertising.

>>14135247
a McGriddle?

Ah yes, that instantly explains to me how this is a pancake breakfast sandwich with syrup flavored buns.

>>14135271
I believe is pronounced McGriddles®

>>14134784
The waiter microtransaction is already a reality, Anon.

>>14135107
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YXZzf_-clt8

>>14134730
Frankly, I was actually kind of hoping this stupid gimmick themed restaurants would be among the casualties.

I wonder if Anime Pizza is still in business.
There was something kind of adorable about how inept but sincere they where.

>Simple like the mind of a teemo player
Heh

>>14135271
Is "griddle cakes" a regional term or something?
>>14135293
The ® is silent.

>>14134730
why would you recommend from the menu that your customers order the burger with bacon and not just include it on the burger by default? extras are fine, but this makes it seem like they're intentionally making a shittier burger so they don't have to put the cost of bacon on the burger price.

>>14135379
>vidya themed restaurant
>takes out a recommended part of the meal and sells it separately

it's part of the experience

>>14134888
My uncle works at Nintendo and he says they're cool with it.

>>14135379
I miss how when you bought a meal you got the whole thing. Ever since eating went mainstream, meal developers started selling unfinished products because they know people will still pay for them.

>>14134899
I ate a place with retarded menu names in Malta once. The rabbit stew, which I believe was named Roger Rabbit, was really good, but I felt very out of place there as the only non-hipster.

>>14134829
I'd unironically drink the pedobear

>>14134730
4x Spicys memes please.

>>14134829
my fucking god kazoo kid is a drink

>>14134730
Is this really what all restaurants are like now that lockdown has ended?

>>14135475
Everyone was trapped inside with only videogames. It's the only world we know now.

>>14135493
God damn it.

The spicy meme with senpai fries sounds really good

That menu is stupid just like any that uses dumb names that don't relate to the food, but being able to get two sliders instead of one large burger is a good and just idea.
Sliders are wonderful.

>Teemo Special
>simple, like the mind of a Teemo player
I chortled

>>14134730
The Face Invader with senpai fries sounds good

>>14134730
I miss quarantine already

>>14134730
>Rip in Pepperonis
HE SAID THE THING

>>14135408
kek

>>14134730
>a burger is considered an entrée
>a burger is considered the dish before the main course
do americans really?

>>14136803
For whatever reason, we use the word entree to refer to the main course.

>>14134730
The Rip sounds nice, meaty and different. My little sister is unironically a teemo main but she eats like a horse so two teemo specials I guess.

>>14134829
Start from the bottom and let me work my way up. Here's $250, don't let my cup get empty.

>the virgin console menu
>the chad PC Gaming Egg Sandwich

>>14137133
Yes, the reason is that americans are retarded.

>>14134730
>furikake
>not bukkake
Pass

>>14137133
>Despite the entrée being cut from menus (along with many other courses cut), the term “entrée” remained on American menus. Why did the French term survive? “Restaurants’ desire to remain associated with French cuisine,” said Kaufman. “The term elevates the quality of the restaurant in the eyes of the client.”

So yeah the reason is that americans are retarded.

>>14134829
>may or may not be served with loli

so there is a chance to have one with the drink

>>14135379
>>14135408
Probably a lot of jews or muslims in the area. This is why you rarely see jews eating in pizzerias

>>14139482
what the fuck are you talking about jews love pizza

>>14139536
Pepperonni is a pork product.

I had an idea for a deli that named sandwiches after basic D&D classes.

Some examples:
The Fighter
Choose meat, choose cheese, choose sauce. Infinite versatility.

The Druid
Avocado and sprouts with vegan chipotle mayo. 100% animal free for the nature lover.

The Cleric
Chicken, provolone, and bacon with alfredo sauce. A truly heavenly bite.

The Rogue
Ham, swiss, and a honey habanero sauce. Nobody sees the heat coming.

The Barbarian (food challenge)
Garlic-roasted bone-in chicken and a slice of every kind of cheese we have sitting on a loaf of french bread. Finish it and win a T-shirt.

>>14134830
>and remember
>we are all in this together

>>14135002
They do. I've always said small, medium, or large and it's never been an issue.

>>14139580
That Druid needs something more. Maybe grilled portabello.

>longer respawn times
Does this mean it takes a while to shit out?

>all the shit that's "recommended with bacon" but doesn't come with bacon and bacon is an extra buck
FUCKING KIKES AAAAAAA

>>14135357
I look at this sign and I already know what the neighborhood is like and that the owner of Anime Pizza made a huge mistake.

>>14134730
>thought this was a joke
>google "senpai fries"
>joshtick food truck
>it's real
>still in business
You win. Either this is the most brilliant troll I've seen lately or I've never been so disgusted with a menu in my entire life. Like, the owner could be this big-ass mofo, and I'd still fucking try to fight him.

What'll it be?

>>14134730
>>14134829

>>14139580
Rogues are more versatile than fighters, though of course bards are the definitive jacks of all trades. Regardless, I'd call choose you own toppings multi-classing.

>>14134730
I bet this places charges admission for unlimited video games, with cheap food and beer... Some barcades attract some really talented kitchen staff, but I don't think this is one of them.

>>14139901
Get me the Goldberger and add bacon, I wanna work my heart into a shoot.

>>14134829
>/ck/ handshake: malort with a can of malort

>>14135357
They bought the farm a while ago

>>14135357
Probably not, their last inspection was in 2015.
>>14139677
It's was in San Antonio.

>>14139901

>>14140152
Jesus that's gross

>>14139901
One sweltering hot summer of 1992, please

>>14139624
I'm trying to keep it a relatively traditional deli, grilled portabello wouldn't really be an option. But that's not a bad idea, maybe I could think of some other way of doing it, like smoking.

>>14139958
It's arguable, but I wanted to kind of sell the idea of "pick your weapon" as the fighter. Multie-classing would probably be even more confusing. I don't think people think of rogues and bards as the versatile classes, even though they really are.

Here's a few more:

The Bard
Turkey, pepperjack cheese, pesto, and a layer of crunchy kettle chips. A sandwich worth singing about.

The Ranger
Prosciutto, manchego, and fig preserves. A hearty sandwich for a trek through the woods.

To be honest, I'm a little lost on Paladin (since there's so many similarities to the cleric), and differentiating between wizard and sorcerer are going to be really difficult as sandwiches.

>>14139580
I'd burn your gay restaurant to the ground

>>14140152
>a slice of ass with a cumshot in the crack and a side of corn please

>>14140250
I think it's really cool that you're trying to express D&D classes as food. Ignore the other guy, if he tries to burn down your restaurant, I'll help you out out the fire.

Maybe make the Paladin more "beefy" since it's a tank class?

Sorcerer's seem like a specialized class, while wizards are more flexible. Do with it what you will . Good luck

>>14134730
Why do "restaurants" do shit like this? This one is cringy, but it's not any worse than the millions of places with shit like "Superman burger" on their menu.

>>14140250
Paladin should lay on hams.

>>14140493
>Sorcerer's seem like a specialized class, while wizards are more flexible
Going on this theme: Sorcerer's are all about raw volume of spells cast, but have a small selection; Wizard's can learn (almost) every spell that exists, but can't cast as many per day. So maybe make the Sorcerer's sandwich have a large amount of a few small ingredients, while the wizards should be a "everything but the kitchen sink" kinda sandwich.

>>14140839
kek

>>14134730
Why does every ingredient on that top burger look an inch thick

>>14139536
>>14139551
There's a Kosher pizza place near me. Unironically great. Not as good as the one run by an Italian but better than all the ones run by Greeks

>>14134730
What a shitty concept.

>>14134730
>order food
>while it's being made, backwards longjump against the counter to build up speed
>get given food
>turn the camera 180 degrees and clip out of the store to avoid paying

>>14134730
Spicy meme with bacon please

>>14135357
>serivce
How is it even possible to write a typo ?!

>>14134730
>>coronavirus ends
When do you guys think it’s gonna end ?

>>14141705
It won't.
We are in the middle of something called a paradigm shift. All the weird new shit you're seeing is becoming the new normal.
I don't like it, but that's how it is.

>>14134899
>going to a restaurant and refusing to order anything because you don't like the names

autism

>>14134730
So the menu is themed after the restaurants overall theme? that's quite clever

>>14134784
>desert DLC
Fuck you, I like Egypt levels

>>14140250
>I'm trying to keep it a relatively traditional deli, grilled portabello wouldn't really be an option.
Just sell stuffed mushrooms as a side.

>>14134730
>less than 10 sammies
>2 of them have mozzarella sticks (ran out of memes?)
>almost half recommend bacon but none come with it
No.

>>14134914
You got cucked to death by the Chad chef like a good little piggie.

>>14134730
Lemme get a Mario an a side a fries! C'mon now!

>>14139580
Not to be harsh but your targeted audience is very small, youd go under in a week unless your sandwiches are REALLY good.

>>14134899
This is true. Some years ago, one of the sandwich chains (Quiznos, I think) had a promotion for sandwiches that were called "Sammie's" and I think each flavor even had a cute little name. At one point, I was asking my dad to stop there and order some, and he refused because he didn't want to ask for a Sammy wammy lmao
Believe me, non-soyed normies have a much lower bar than even the ridiculous OP image

>>14140213
KWAB

>>14134730
Uh yeah I'll have a red dead burger with bacon and fries
>>14134829
and a uh facepalm sounds good
>>14139901
and pretzel pile driver to start

>>14134829
please tell me this was real at some point

>>14140162
It's from a Japanese steakhouse for wrestletards.

>>14134829
>151

>>14134730
Do these gimmick places ever stay open for longer than a few months?

>>14144410
They could if they were in a college town, especially a college filled with gullible nerds.

>>14134829
This seems innocent desu. Most normies wouldn't be familiar with most of these memes because they're over 6 years old and they never made it outside of 9gag

>>14134899
I wish I could just order hash browns with tomatoes and mushrooms and onions instead of chopped capped and smothered

>>14136803
what do the french call the main course?

>>14139580
I've never heard of a deli that requires a customer hygiene policy

>>14142642
I live in a fairly small city and there's a store dedicated to nothing but warhammer. who knows. there's a board game shop with a little restaurant in it too, their menu might have cheesy names

>>14139834
There's tons of themed restaurants out there.

>>14144354
>here's your disgusting fucked up steak with 2 mouthfuls of corn
it seems like some weird shit an old dude living on his own would make

>>14134730
Where the burn it down for insurance money meal?

>>14146589
plat principal/plat de résistance

>>14134730
>Menu design is themed after Donkey Kong
>not a single Donkey Kong item on the menu
4/10, would try the spicy meme tho

>>14142740
holy shit dude i got these all the time too and my dad would purposefully call them "sams". i don't remember the sammy wammy but if he ordered it, he wouldve said "one sam wam please."

>coronavirus ends
Oh, Anon.

>>14134829
Where is the rawberry for powerthirst?

>>14146984
>Order the gun variation of Power Thirst
>"Sorry sir, there's only one flavor, our owner is just autistic and insisted we needed more memes."

>>14135247
>Big Mac
McDonalds is best known for burgers, so "Mac" probably means a burger. It's a large burger.
>McFlurry
Bad name. Could be anything.
>Shamrock Shake
It's a shake, but the flavor is a mystery.
>McWrap
It's obviously going to be lean chicken and salad in a flour tortilla. Nobody orders a "wrap" at a burger place unless they're scared of fat.

>>14134795
>>14134995
Me too bud. One of the worse food trucks in the area. Wouldn't buy from them again. Not worth the money

>>14135408
lel

>>14134899
based

>>14134730
>Open a restaurant with a video game theme
>Menu makes you look like an 80 year old man who barely knows what a video game is

>>14134784
>enter restaurant
>restrooms doesn't unlock unless you purchase a meal

>>14135339
>I don't even it?
>I think he thinks you're Italian
>I am. . .
Cuppa da balls

>>14134730
For me it's Senpai Fries

>>14139580
>the Barbarian
I genuinely want to attempt that, but I'd have to fast for three fucking days afterwards.

>>14134730
man the first con i attend after corona-chan is going to be insane

>>14140839
based

>>14137133
The reason is that is the original meaning, referring to the course that made the grandest entrance. As the number of courses cut down over time the meaning changed in the old world, but the slowness of communication stifled America from following suit.

>>14146598
>LGS with little restaurant
The one in my city is the only place in the area that'll make a Coney Dog. Pretty sure that single handedly keeps them afloat. Also they do baked goods in house that are real good.

>>14148369
I just found their menu

https://huntsville.grubsouth.com/r/1746/restaurants/delivery/Sandwiches-Deli/Lucky-Dice-Cafe-huntsville

Kinda neat they added board games to the delivery menu.

>I am Groot (Classic Chicken Salad)
>Captain HAMerica (Ham and Swiss)

>>14134784
>waiters forces you to succeed QTE to eat your food

>>14134730
Too bad the liberals are already planning for a “second wave” of corona just in time for elections.

>"Burger with 'Murican cheese"
Please come to our shitty Reddit restaurant we're relevant I promise

>>14134784
>you have to edit your wallet's autobios to clear memory for payment
>the waitress tweets at unadjustable full volume after finally loading, waking up the entire restaurant
>the entire meal crashes while you're rewinding the next course's tape

>>14135294
You are not a smart man

>>14134829
>it's a trap
>the waitress doesn't take out her meaty 9" girlcock and unload a fat load in your glass
That's some fucking gay shit

>>14148531

just from reading this i can tell youre fat and never get pussy

>>14149399
more pussy than you fag

>>14149397
its the cheapest thing on the menu, at $2, I can't help but wonder if its just an empty class

>>14139580
I'll choke the life from your pathetic 16" pencil neck

>>14141705
When your private property is completely worthless

>>14149404

did i strike a nerve bro?

>>14148531
You're saying that as if zion don isn't foaming at the mouth for another round of BRRRRRRRR. Do you think republicans are conservative ? America has blue socialists with niggers and gay, or red socialists with Jews

>>14134730
>not listing apps as MULTIPLAYER

>>14149462
>muh joos
Stop false flagging. If anything, Trump controls the Jews.

>>14149472
Trump is a cryptosocialist Keynesian boomer. Just keep on PROOOOOOONTTTIIIINNNG AHHHHH LINE GOOOOOO UUUUUPPP I'M GONNA FUCKING PROOOOONT

>>14139901
>crushrooms
>the body builder
>big boy brownie

>>14148433
>Reuben al Ghul
>Anakin Rye-walker

>>14146735
Fucking gajin that beef has been folded a thousand times

>>14134730
Senpai fries are probably great, but I’d toss them in a little sesame oil

>>14149451
No but your mom did Haha

>>14149556
>Spider-Ham
>Boars Head choice cherrywood smoked ham and spider with cheddar cheese on fresh-baked sourdough bread

BING BING WAHOO
MAWIO!!!!

>>14134730
>coronavirus ends

in what timeline?

Also, that restaurant wont last longer.

https://sweetoburrito.com/menu/

I'm not going to screencap it for you.

RIP downtown location. I miss being pissed drunk in there before 3am.

>>14139580
Bone in chicken on french bread.
So if you survive the chicken bone fragments what do you get?

>>14151568
A t-shirt. Didn't you read his post?