/ck/ - Food & Cooking

it's 100% an excuse for enabling alcoholism

It's what it is, being a dork about beer is alright as long as you're not a prick about it.

>>14088036
Making beer tasting like fruits and not beer is just retarded.

>>14088036
Why do all of the others make sense but not beer?
Your assertion makes no sense.

>>14088048
Generally I agree, but actually Kriek is fucking based and not to be confused with hipster trash.

>>14088048
hops are fruits so beer is very much fruit flavored

>>14088073
Imo there's a difference between traditional style beers like the belgian fruit lambics and try hard fruity ipas.
>>14088077
Classic pilseners don't have fruit flavours at all.

>>14088036
Being a wine fag takes a lot of money, and coffee just isn't varied enough to be interesting - even though many people are very particular and drink it every day. Beer and whiskey are both accessible and have a tone of different styles, so there's always something new to try and talk about. I understand not getting beer though, assuming you're not American; it doesn't really travel and very few places have a real beer scene.

>>14088077
wow it's really this kind of pedantic horseshit that really wins people over. good work pointing this out

>>14088088
I think what >>14088077 means is that hops are technically the fruit of the hops plant, so any flavour they impart would be a fruit flavour.

>>14088036
Snobs are annoying in general. I drink beer, I drink any beer if it's good, but why would I disgrace somebody for drinking a beer I don't like? I don't care, I'm not going to drink it.

>>14088091
i got my (You)s that's all that matters

>>14088093
This. Also, hops plants are capable of producing several aroma and flavour compounds that are normally associated with other fruits, such as citrus, peach, melon, pineapple etc etc
So beer is absolutely a fruit-flavored beverage, and that's before you even start involving modern meme beers.

I cringe thinking back on how much money I spent over the years on pretentious craft beers that weren’t even good. I turned 21 right when craft beer was blowing up so I got sucked into it for a few years.

I now understand you literally can’t beat the experience of a couple cheap, ice cold, mass produced domestic brews. No matter how much money you spend or how long you wait in line for it, the dude getting his beer from a gas station is enjoying his more than you.

Whiskey snobs are just as bad. Whiskey and beer both taste like shit. Although, at least whiskey doesn't make you shart yourself and smell like sour piss like beer does.

>>14088119
This is such bullshit.

>>14088119
This is just the same as being a beer snob, just on the other end. Craft beer is good, cheap lager is good. Beer is good. Just don't be an ass about beer and you're good.

>>14088119
>weren't even good
No, anon, buying Goose Island and Brewdog doesn't make you an expert on craft beer. I have NEVER seen anyone willingly turn back to mass produced beer after they've tasted their first good Belgian, imperial stout or IPA.

>>14088124
Good for you. Have another vodka Cosmo.

I make beer and grow facial hair as a substitute for a personality. How may I interject myself today?

>>14088036
Why not beer, especially if whisk(e)y and wine pass the test? You can tell about as much about the water of a Pilsner as you can the soil of a grape or the oak of a whiskey barrel. Some beer is large-scale cheap trash (which, even as far as coffee, whisky, and wine are concerned, has its own charms and uses), but some is very tenderly cared for.

>>14088048
Some fruit beer is quite refreshing, and the things that can be done with some of the newer strains of hops and yeast is at least interesting, if not actually good.

>>14088104
... If I'd have read this two weeks ago, I might have tried to hug you through the screen. My stepdad called up while I was making beer... trying to explain to him that there's lots of beer he doesn't like, and that's ok, and that I was making a beer I don't really like... "Why would you waste your time on that?" Because one of my friends is having a rough go right now, and I'd like to give him about 8 gallons of this tropical NEIPA abortion that he loves so he can at least be drunk while he's depressed.

>>14088115
Capable of, yes, but you don't find too many late hop additions in classic styles. You can get a hint of citrus and stone fruit in some paler ales, and obviously banana and citrus from the things mutant Belgian yeast does to wheat, but it's nowhere near as fruit forward as newer/new world pale ales can be with their newfangled (old news) Galaxies and Mosaics... go figure, a lot of the chemicals that let hops do what they do are the same chemicals that let weed do what it does, and they get brought forward or pushed back through the same methods... besides, hops are flowers.

>>14088039
It's not binge drinking it's sessioning
>>14088069
Most "snobs" aren't really snobs by any reasonable definition, they're just people with basic standards which trigger the shit out of the kind of dirtbags who will put literally anything in their mouth as long as they saw a Super Bow ad for it

>>14088196
hops and cannabis are very closely related

>>14088265
so are humans and apes

>>14088286
not him, but you can graft hops and cannabis.

>>14088286
humans ARE apes
what's your point anyway?

>>14088292
now that I think about it, I have a relative with a pork graft. she is taking immunosuppressants, thought.

>>14088036
I love that apparently people still associate craft beer with hipsters despite craft beer now being almost exclusively popular with suburban dads.

>>14088286
Yeah, and that's why apes are the last step in pharma testing before we test on humans. It's close enough when it comes to biochemistry. If you're going to argue that an animal needs to score the same on the SAT as another animal before they can be considered to work by roughly the same chemical principles, asians would not be able to use aspirin manufactured by wh*teoids

>>14088301
Do you think that apes smell similar to human, as hops do to cannabis?

Yes.
>t. A professional brewer

>>14088036
>Whisky, wine, coffee all make sense
no they don't.
>>14088088
>there's a difference between traditional style beers like the belgian fruit lambics and try hard fruity ipas.
and what exactly is that difference?
hundreds of years of tradition doesn't make it any less shitty.

>>14088308
I don’t have a lot of experience sniffing monkeys

I’ve smelled skunky beer that smelled like skunky weed though

>>14088401
funny way of admitting you've never tried a belgian kriek

>>14088300
...who are former hipsters.

>>14088176
I take it neat, kid.

>>14088404
isohumulones/alpha acids break down under UV, resulting in MBT (3-methyl-2-butene-1-thiol if memory serves). Both plants containe different (and some of the same) terpenes, terpenoids, and thiols/mercaptans... palmate leaves... use and abuse of the flowers.

They might have a common ancestor, but they might not. Lots of plants contain terpenes and thiols.

>>14088036
get the fuck back joggers your summer beverage has just arrived.
can anything be more fucking based than this shit right here?

>>14088463
>They might have a common ancestor, but they might not.
they're literally in the same family, they are like cousins

>>14088036
I used to work at a brew store. The only people who were belligerent about beer were either fat low income white people who would trap me and complain to me about beer not being specifically german lager or Budweiser. No one is really that snobby any more so it's just the people who drink bud bitching about something that hasnt been a problem for years. Wine people can still be really snobby though.
>>14088173
I've seen it with IPA's some people really hate that pine resin flavor in most of the popular ones.
>>14088048
Except Belgian sour beers are fantastic. And there are some great german beers that are served with fruit syrup. Stop pretending you can only make beet one way or in one rigid system. The Reinheitsgebot is meme garbage in the modern era so loosen the fuck up nerd.
>>14088308
I've smelled some really grungy public housing hovels that smelled like chimpanzee so I guess.

>>14088477
Sometimes "cousins" wind up being adopted into plant families - like the ones brought in and kicked out of the Apiaceae and Brassicaceae. They're similar enough, and old enough that even if the similarities arose independently it wouldn't really matter... I'm going to keep tending to my Japanese maple bonsais and pissing off the neighbours.

>>14088426
why would i try something from a dead nation?
;)

>>14088558
You know it's all based on genetics now and not just shared characteristics?

>>14088205
You know you can drink a beer, even two, without getting drunk right?
It’s all about pacing. You’re either underage, Mormon, or Muslim, not sure which. Or maybe Native American, in which case a single beer would actually have you stumbling blackout drunk.

>>14088505
>fat low income white people who would trap me and complain to me about beer not being specifically german lager or Budweiser.

Aw man I really miss being at a brewery and overhearing a trashy boomer shouting "I JUST WANT A NORMAL BEER THAT TASTES LIKE BEER, NONE OF THIS SOUR OR HOP BEER. JUST GIMME A REGULAR BEER"

>>14088036
Are you trying to say that there is no quality or taste difference between beers?

>>14088608
I have never experienced this... I've been asked "Do you have any... beer flavoured beers?", and I'd chuckle, and bring them back down to the first tap. Maybe the gold and wood threw them off, but "_'s Lager" was branded into the handle. It's closer to a Marzen than a Budweiser, but most people who asked me that question enjoyed the beer. If they didn't like that, I'd go two taps down to the Cream Ale (white plastic tap... colour coordination, why doesn't it work?). 4 flagships, 6 regular beers, and 2 circulating testers might be a bit much, but we were doing fine right up to the world ending.

Beerfags are all fat.

>>14088600
>REEEEE MUSLIMS ARE MAKING ME SHARIA LAW
Get a grip cleetus

>>14088608
That's a hipster thing though. My boomer dad basically won't drink anything that isn't DIPA or imperial stout because his taste buds are shot from old age. Younger folks are sick and tired of novelty beers and just want something that doesn't try to act like the class clown with chili peppers and donut toppings and ridiculous exotic wood chips added

>beer has so much more variety at an affordable price range
>most expensive bottles hit like 100 bucks

>whiskey snobs think only 100+ dollar bottles are good
>100+ dollar bottles are just scams, and most of the best stuff are from craft distilleries and not in the autistic state kentucky, or the inbred UK.

Dont even get me started on wine

Old money beerfag here. At this point the only styles of beer worth consuming are Barleywine's and Pilsners. The hazy ipa and smoothie crowd don't actually like or enjoy beer, they like sugar.

>>14088608
I love this because beer for literally thousands of years was all sour

>>14088680
>That's a hipster thing though. My boomer dad basically won't drink anything that isn't DIPA or imperial stout because his taste buds are shot from old age. Younger folks are sick and tired of novelty beers and just want something that doesn't try to act like the class clown with chili peppers and donut toppings and ridiculous exotic wood chips added
In Germany it's totally different. Younger folks drink pilseners. Even the cheap and bitter ones, while the older buy more mild pilseners or weissbier. Or they also experiment with dark or red beers.

Avoiding cheap domestics and getting a decent craft beer, like Upland, Goose Island, Sierra Nevada, or even Sam Adams, makes sense. Exclusively drinking microbrews purchased exclusively from local breweries and obscure beers only distinguished from others by inflated price is really gay.

>>14088680
>singling out a sub-point of his argument as though it composes the entirety of it
>projecting nonsense on said micropoint

>>14089068
not sure what any of this has to do with anal sex but ok junior

>>14088036
ok boomer.

>>14088036
all snobs suck beer whiskey wine or coffee

>>14089125
you sound like a snob

The only beer snobs that are really terrible people are the ones that drink IPAs exclusively.

No one is further up their own ass than IPAfags.

>>14088036
Nah coffee and meat smokers are the worst groups

>>14089192
Idk the stout fuckers are pretty obnoxious

>>14089192
>>14089255
My personal experience is that IPA guys are real high on their own farts and love telling people how good IPAs are and how shit other beers are. Stout men are usually more reserved, maybe as arrogant, but not as agressively so.

>>14088166
This.

>>14088196
>brewing a buddy 8 gallons of his favorite beer
You're a good friend.

>>14089279
Not on this board. Ipa fans are whatever when people shit on the style, the stout and especially Trappist crowd can't fathom you not caring for what they like

>>14088036
I met more cringey coffee fags than beer fags. Look at Black Rifle Cofee company. One big cesspool of cringe

>>14088750
One of my friends when studying abroad loved having germans try IPAs and look at the faces they make

>>14089381
Yeah, it will never become popular here. I only have one friend, who likes IPAs. Once i and some friends tested one beer of every popular type (around 30 beers or so) and boy, you should have seen our faces when the belgian beers were on turn. Even worse than our faces after the IPA.

>>14089564
I always found that odd since you guys like hoppy lagers so much. I think a regular pale ale would be more your style that an IPA. Although my German beer loving grandma really enjoyed two hearted when she tried it

>>14089619
It's not the bitterness of IPAs that we don't like, it's the strange flavours many IPAs have. Although the really bitter pilseners are only common in northern Germany.

>>14089697
Strange flavors from the specific hops? The only ones that sell me on new ipas are el Dorado and mosaic. Galaxy ain't bad and centennial are classic.

>>14089729
I don't know if the strange flavours come from the hops alone or also the yeasts. But every IPA i tried had some strange fruity flavours. But some hipster pilseners also tasted like mango and shit like that. There's also no need in general for extreme bitter beers with no other interesting taste i would say.
Also everything that doesn' come in crates isn't really attractive for Germans at all in a long term.

>>14089814
Yeah that's the hops. As for the bitterness, that's why I'd suggest a regular pale ale. The malty backbone to them brings the bitterness way down. Obviously some aren't that way, but the majority of Midwest pale ales are really well balanced

Let people drink whatever the fuck they want however the fuck they want.
If you disagree with that you're a snobby fag

>>14089089
This is why y'all are cowards. You want to say some ignorant racist ass shit and as soon as somebody clap back on you, NOW you wanna try to sound sophisticated and shit. Get the fuck up outta here.

I'm a legit alcoholic, and I've tried probably over 100 beers. at the end of the day they all taste kind of bad. just grain rot water made bitter as a preservant basically.

1. ethanol is dusgusting (it's literally a toxic solvent and tastes that way)
2. hops are like pine resin
3. nobody likes eating mouldy bread, so why is beer any different

long story short, I am 99% sure everyone is just pretending (perhaps unconsciously) to actually enjoy the taste of beer. the worst is people who ""enjoy"" beer for how """"""refreshing""""" it is. uhhhh, do they not realize beer degydrates you and makes you piss 20 times off a single sip?

case in point, if beer tastes so good, then why is non-alcoholic beer barely brought? why don't fast food restaurants serve it along with theur meals?

it's because it tastes bad and people only drink it for the alcohol

>>14090274
How do I retweet this? :^)

im going on a date today

>>14090280
>the worst is people who ""enjoy"" beer for how """"""refreshing""""" it is.
I don't agree with your verdict on the taste of beer, but I agree with this. If I'm thirsty and I'm about to have a beer, I always have some water first. Beer just makes me dry.

>>14089564
>you should have seen our faces when the belgian beers were on turn. Even worse than our faces after the IPA.
Which ones did you try? I really can't imagine someone disliking something like Chimay or Rochefort.

>>14090280
what a boring post

>>14090274
Huh?

>>14090274
go away nigger

I wish I liked drinking weird craft recipe beers. The people into them are part of a secret society where if you learn enough about beer and the landscape of flavor profiles and can talk about it you are now in that secret society. It's fun to be a part of a group, and if you're an alcohol that's a pretty cool group to be a part of. Any time I get drunk by craft beer I feel HORRIBLE the next day. If I drink vodka I can drink as much as I want and feel completely fine the next day. So for me I'm not a part of that club unfortunately.

>>14090840
dang anon where do you live? maybe visit a brewery in the middle of the day when it's not as busy and order a flight to experiment.

>>14090840
The only people who think beer guys are cool and not big annoying faggots are other beer guys. You should consider yourself lucky

>>14088036
my order from worst to least worse
>Wine
You cant tell the difference between cheap and expensive wine t.wineexporterIRL

>coffee
I live in Melbourne, everyone here thinks their a coffee snob, some of my friends are. I told them i got a coffee from south america, its super expensive. They came over and tried it and loved it. I used nescafe blend 43....

>Beer
You can distinguish flavours but some of them take it too far and get overly critical.

>Whisky
The most reasonable of all. Good whisky is worth the money and the snobbery comes because people say "Johnnie Walker Black Label is amazing with coke"

>>14088600
>Native American
Oi haole! I'm on my second.

>>14090396
>If thirsty, water then beer
Yes. One thousand times yes. I've murdered 24s trying to quench my thirst, but it's a Tantalusian task. I'll stay dry until I try to murder two gallons of water before bed, then I'm just up all night peeing, and still wake up with a dry mouth.

>>14090840
What craft beers are you drinking, and teach me your ways of quaffing vodka. I'm good for a handful of drinks, but if I overdo it, I'll wind up actually hungover, not just tired and dry.

>>14090973
Just because you're the last one.
>Wine
I can generally tell if a wine's been aged for longer than 3 years, but yeah, that's about it. Syrah/Shiraz with game meat, Chianti with anything else, maybe Chardonnay or Gewurtztraminer with delicate fish, and maybe Moscato/Muscat if I'm feeling frisky.

>Coffee
Coffee is good. I like coffee. Not huge on most lighter roasts.

>Beer
Yes, you are absolutely right, and I'm pretty sure I never need to taste Cascade again in my life, unless it's properly balanced.

>Whiskey
There's definitely some veblen happening, but, yeah, older whiskey is usually better, and it costs more... that said, once you're above 18y, it's going to be good. The type of cask wood, or single-origin peat might add some interesting notes to it, but once it's old enough to kill, it's old enough to be killer.

>>14088600
>Or maybe Native American, in which case a single beer would actually have you stumbling blackout drunk.
This stereotype is rooted in unscrupulous traders giving injuns a shitload of whisky so they could collect easy signatures for predatory and exploitative trade negotiations

>>14090280
If you were really an alcoholic you'd understand no one really thinks it's "good" people's bodies just like the taste of feeling good. It's just pick your poison.

>>14090280
>. nobody likes eating mouldy bread
Bread literally cannot exist without fermentation.
Yeast is mold.

>>14091887
Yeast is yeast. They're a species of fungus.

>>14090280
... I was trying to avoid it, but why not?
I used to be able to taste this off, banana ish taste in my dad's Molson's (I can still taste it when I try to drink it quickly while it's warm). It turned me off beer until I was 14, when I tried a Guinness. I will drink a single beer in an evening, or a handful of near-beers if I have to drive or do anything involving sobriety. A handful of non alcoholic beers are quite good, but there's something off with the body of them, they feel thin. Some smaller chains (usually with liquor licences) sell non alcoholic beer as well... but maybe you're right and I'm the exception that proves the rule.

>>14088091
>winning people over
you're trying too hard

>>14089375
>trappist
The Best beer with the worst fan base

>>14088119
>I don't like thing
>therefore everyone who likes thing i don't like is a sucker
I'll just keep enjoying my sours and stouts thanks.

>>14088705
>most of the best stuff are from craft distilleries
Said no serious whiskey collector ever.
Seriously America is fucking trash when it comes to smaller whiskey makers. The vast majority of them source entirely from MGP/Seagram's in Indiana and the ones that don't do the small barrel meme while having absolute garbage tier spirit that takes like rotting vegetation.
The only exceptions are New Riff and Westland who are actually making mostly enjoyable shit although the latter is stupid overpriced. Even then most newer small operations in Europe/UK (Bimber, Daftmill, Zuidam, Kilchoman) are leagues above American small scale distillers and have way more quality controls generally. America needs to fix its fucktarded liquor laws (especially on bottle volume size) and not allow people to use sourced spirit and claim its made elsewhere.

>>14090280
>I've tried probably over 100 beers
That's small fish numbers. Also unless you've tried a wide variety (not just shit you can find at a grocery store from Coors Banquet to Lagunitas) you're opinion is full of shit. Some people drink for the inebriation while some drink for the flavor. Sometimes its for both. Just because you don't like the taste of beer doesn't mean everyone else doesn't. If it tasted like complete shit beer wouldn't be popular in the first place past the cheap shit.

>>14092912
I have never understood the hype. They're good beers whatever, but I'll by karmeliet, kwak, Chimay, or anything from unibroue before I grabbed a trappist

>>14088680
>SHARIA
Never said that. I’m saying that roach teens always gripe on the internet about alcohol existing.

>>14091729
It’s also rooted in threat biology. They never developed brewing, and so they never developed a genetic tolerance.

>>14094041
Not only is Chimay trappist, it's probably the most well known example you absolute retard.

>>14094099
Oh no way. Never really looked desu just bought it because it's so popular. That's the only one I'll get behind. The rest can suck it. Orval and all that shit