/ck/ - Food & Cooking

muh dick

>>13753196
I kept it relatively simple. Sausage and eggs, sliced up orange, biscuits, lattes. (or just coffee if you don't do espresso)
You don't want to go all out making it into a big weird thing, just take it easy, make a homey feel.

>>13753196
OP can't inb4

muh dick

>>13753206
muh dick

Make them a normal fucking breakfast you maniac.
Just normal eggs, cooked however you do best, toast from fresh bread, a little fruit, some bacon.
You're gonna freak her out if you rush her with crepes Suzette with sparklers on them and "thanks for the sex" written on them with chocolate syrup.

coomstick seems to be popular if she actually likes you

How about you ask him/her what they like? Is that so hard, you fucking sperg?

>>13753196
For me it's the Mcdonalds flame broiled McChicken Sandwich.

>>13753222
her(him), actually

>>13753196
This was painful to read, also
A denver omelet with pancakes and orange juice.
Flashy presentations are for dinner and hors d'oeuvres.

>>13753220
> no effort at all
Enjoy your unanswered calls.

Eggs

>>13753222
Seriously, why would you ask them? Do you have no idea at all how to impress someone without having to ask for their fucking input first? Cuck.

>>13753242
cringe, have sex

>You like scrambled eggs?
>How firm?

And then I take like fifteen minutes to get those curds just right.

Granola bar and a slap on the ass as they walk out the door

>>13753235
Frying up a decent egg, grinding a little coffee, and slicing a grapefruit in half is a simple gesture but it should be all you need.
I mean she already fucked you once, you're basically over the hump and can start coasting.

What do you do if you intermittent fast?

>>13753263
Have some easy stuff she can just grab from the fridge or don't schedule a date you expect to end with sex and her staying over right before your fast.

>>13753230
Might be ‘painful’ to you, boss, but this is an impending certainty for me and I’d like assistance.

>>13753263
Presumably be a virgin.

>>13753196
I would ask them what their favourite breakfast was, and make sure I stocked up the day before with shit to make pancakes, fry-ups, whatever.

If they said “anything”, I would ask them to at least say their favourite style of eggs. Keep it light and make that with whatever appropriate sides. If they had no preference then scrambled eggs with cream, served with smoked salmon on toast. Want to keep it light so she’s ready for muh dick straight after.

Make her an Uber home

>>13753196
First day on /ck/ you faggot? This is one of the boards with the oldest posters around and you come here with a reddit post like that panicking like a teenager abloobloo will she like my breakfast. Anyway if you're too dumb to already know what she likes you can't go wrong with crèpes (prepare the batter the day before and keep it in the fridge) + freshly squeezed orange juice + earl gray tea. Prepare a fruit salad + some pastries such as croissants in case she's greedy and the crèpes aren't enough. Also muh dick.

>>13753196
Just make her drink a few mimosa and she will eat whatever you give her.

>>13753196
Make her eat ALL the eggs.

Also muh dick

>>13753196
Prolly just muh dick
OP can't inb4 you brand new faggot

>>13753196
I used to share a bacon and egg roll with hash Brown and sauteed mushrooms on the side, but recently we've moved on the mushroom burgers with pesto and parmesan.
I made sure to give her some good big dick regularly from the first day she wanted it. Women love good dick

OP here I'm gay btw.

>mushroom burgers with pesto and parmesan

>>13753393
>posts reddit
>quotes nobody

>>13753196
My fiancee has a sweet tooth, so I make her Alton Brown's French toast every so often. She likes it a lot, and it's not difficult at all.

Scrambled eggs and toast was good for some of my exes. I skipped the meat because most of them felt it was too heavy in the morning.

>>13753196
Omelets, for whatever reason, communicate attention to detail and devotion.

>>13753196
Homemade cinnamon rolls and french pressed gourmet coffee. Trust me, women like sweets and carbs after a resounding hosing. I suspect it's evolutionary, getting immediate energy sources to the budding fetus.

I'd prefer biscuits and gravy with eggs on the side, but that's not gonna fly with grils.

>>13753196
I made my now husband a massive fry-up, and he basically never left. Moved in a few weeks later.

>>13753456
>load him down with so much food that he gets sleepy and doesn't have the energy to leave
Clever girl. Or girl(male), whatever

>>13753196
Keep some pantry staples, eggs, milk, and bread on hand. If you have cheese, vegetables, fruit, and meats that's also good. Then you can offer them French toast, pancakes, any type of eggs, or an omelet without it feeling too much like you planned. These are all foods a functional adult has most of the time anyways. The fruit is best with French toast or pancakes, but serve it on the side of a savory dish, too.
If you want, you can also do potatoes. I like this recipe, but I use butter. https://minimalistbaker.com/best-ever-vegan-breakfast-potatoes/
Have coffee and tea to offer, too.

I didn’t even realize this was a thing. You’re supposed to make them breakfast after???!!

>>13753404
> skipped the meat because most of them felt it was too heavy in the morning
This. Don’t make it too heavy. Light and romantic.

>>13753196
I let my now husband do it up the bun first date. He is the professional cook, so he would come cook me all sorts of things to win me over (he didn’t need to because his weiner is amazing).

>>13753196
Homemade crêpes obviously

A green smoothie and eggs on toast - however they like them. I can do a fancy french omelette too, if you want baby.

>>13753625
OP didn’t ask for input from faggots.

>>13753196
Cheese blintzes and diced fruit.
Chorizo egg and cheese burrito if she has a penis.

>>13753332
>crepes AND pastries
Jesus is he fucking an elephant?
Actually OP, make a fuck ton of food and if she eats over 300 calories never speak to her again.

>>13753704
No penis, no tits: Cheese blintzes and diced fruit.
No penis, tits: Avocado toast on wheat, bacon, eggs.
Penis, no tits: Chorizo egg and cheese burrito.
Penis, tits: Denver omelette, sliced orange.

>>13753695
But OP is a faggot.

American pancakes
black coffee ( can be cappucino )
Some baked buns with a variety of toppings
perhaps some fruit.

>>13753196
Pancakes, bacon, and coffee worked for awhile but now I'm back to jerking off and posting on 4chins so idfk

>>13753196
1. is it a dude
2. are you a dude

no troll, my advice 100% depends on your answer

>>13753196
Croissant and espresso. Big greasy breakfasts are revolting

>>13753580
Most humans like to consume calories daily.

>>13753759
What if it's a furry?

>>13753874
Yes.
No.

>>13754021
"No (yes)" or actually "No"?

>>13753877
>croissants aren't greasy
....

>>13754084
Quality ones aren't greasy when they're fresh (and I mean made like half an hour ago fresh). Buttery as all shit, but not greasy.

>>13753736
As I wrote, if she's greedy. You just leave the croissants in a basket. She shouldn't touch them but they are here in case she actually wants to. It's about giving the option and not being a cheapskate anon. Also crèpes aren't pancakes they're pretty thin and she can decide to only have one.

>>13753580
What the fuck did you expect, anon?

Unless you're going to forego breakfast as well, you've got to make something for your waifu to eat. It's extremely rude to eat when you have a guest over without offering them something.

>>13753625
Lmao what

We're going out for brunch, duh

>>13753196
crepes

>>13753196
I'd keep it somewhat quick and simple. Don't want to creep him out, spend too much time in the kitchen or make huge mess.
Something like perfectly fried eggs, toast fruit coffeee/tea and something sweet at the end like a [nice] store-bought pastry.
Not that I will ever get the chance to treat someone I am interested in to a nice brekfast lmao.

>>13753332
>First day on /ck/ you faggot? This is one of the boards with the oldest posters around and you come here with a reddit post like that panicking like a teenager abloobloo will she like my breakfast.
How can somebody type this out and not realize how cringe it is before posting.

>>13753196
this is one of the most cringe posts i've ever read. if you just want some advice on how to cook shit to impress people than writing it in some epic sarcastic teenager tone. i don't think it really matters what you cook them since your personally makes you sound like such a faggot he will probably fuck you in the ass for free if he's into that stuff.

>>13753242
there's actually nothing more pathetic than trying to impress someone as it is, so if you're going to try as hard as you can to impress someone rather than laying yourself bare and being yourself, you know, like an honest person would do, you might as well just ask them what they like so you shallow one dimensional personality can be shored up as much as possible by your also shallow cooking and at the very least they can give you credit for making them something they said they had liked.

>>13753196
jesus christ who is going to read that essay?
"what breakfast to cook for gf?"
there you go retard, and the answer is: breakfast
>muh dick

>>13754974
So epically triggered.

>>13753196
Banana pancakes, peanut butter caramel, raspberry whipped cream served with a diced medley of fruits

>>13753196
Full Scottish lad

>>13753196
>What would you make them for breakfast the next day
An uber booking

>>13753196
something with eggs, bread, meat and some veggies/fruit
anything more would seem like a stretch unless you're both very quirky
less is fine, nothing wrong with coffee and a bagel or something simple

>>13753196
Eggs however. Toast, maybe bacon or sausage. Milk OJ or coffee. Muh dick.

crepe suzettes, homemade sausage, homemade bread, scrambled eggs, roasted cherry tomato

>>13755303
Because not everyone is cooking breakfast for a prospective girlfriend, idiot.

>>13754974
You can want to impress someone and still ‘be yourself’, you melt. Wanting to make a good impression can be part of a person’s personality.

>>13753238
came here to post this

>>13753196
listen to experience and feed her a dozen hard boiled eggs, it's for the best

>>13753196
tamago kake gohan, i like to add kimchi and bacon to mine, maybe fry off some garlic and ginger in with the bacon pieces. Seal the deal with sliced scallions on top

>>13755859
Oh, almost forgot natto too that goes great in there too

>>13755859
She better be a weeaboo too or you’re gonna have problems. Not everyone is gonna want a raw egg for breakfast. Looks tasty otherwise.

>>13753238
>tfw tried eggs and it didn't work
feelsbadman.png

>>13753198
this

I jack Ramsey's scrambled eggs, but use regular mild cheddar and a bit of cream cheese instead of goat cheese. Served with or on thick toast.

That or I make huevos rancheros on a tostada with a mozza crisp on the bottom.

is she paying for the ingredients? I'm not sharing food i've both cooked and paid for

>>13753224
>mcchicken sandwich
>mcfish.jpg
>photo of a big mac

>>13756724
Ramsay’s recipe uses craime fraiche. Not goat cheese.

This thread is comedy gold.

>>13753196
Raisin bran in water
It lets her know I'm a bad boy who doesn't play by society's rules, but also that I'm concerned about her digestive health

>>13753196

>>13756889
Based

>>13753580
Yes, obvious virgin.

So many what guys would do itt.

What would the men like the women to make them for breakfast?

>>13757522
Bowl of eggs.

>>13753238
Can't believe we got so far into the thread before someone posted this.

>>13753456
a way to a mans heart is to his stomach... it really is.

A poached egg on a buttered slice of toast.

Simple, inoffensive, light but enough sustenance to satisfy morning hunger without making them feel overfed.

i have sat here for like ten minutes trying to formulate an answer for this and i can honestly say it depends on their appetite. my current SO some kind of steak and eggs scenario. but in general it would definitely be some kind of fry up with aloo paratha

in general you cant really go wrong with avo toast either. shakshuka is always a winner

>>13757604
So do the range of appetites then. How do you know what their appetite is anyway, if you’ve only just met them?

>>13755848
Remember she has to eat ALL the eggs.

>>13753196
I've always found success with "throw every breakfast item in a pan and then put it in a wrap"

You do, of course, add stuff to the pan at different times (you fry the potatoes and meat before you add your eggs), but it turns out bitches ain't picky if they hungry.

>>13757522
Bacon and ham quiche
Salmon Benedict
Pancakes
Sausage links diced up in hash with gravy
Coffee and oj.

>>13753196

don't look desperate, just show them who you are. personally I didn't cook for my SO until we moved in together.

>>13753235

life is made of small gestures. if you need to fellate someone just for them to consider a relationship, they aren't that into you. if someone wants to date you, they'll say yes over a shitty dunkin donuts coffee accompanied by conversation and a smile.

>>13758684
There’s literally nothing wrong with trying to make a good impression.

>>13758656
All at once?

>>13753196
Probably the worst and most cringe post on the board a the moment, go back, you faggot.

>>13760774
And yet you bumped it, stupid newb. Lrn 2sageh.