/ck/ - Food & Cooking

>>12934523
Make her some carbonara. It's easy as fuck to make and bitches think it's fancy. You can't possibly fuck carbonara up.

>>12934577
Carbonara is actually my favourite pasta dish and I've helped my mum make it when I was a kid so that's a good shout. Only thing is I wasn't sure if I should try make it look fancy like some master chef shit just to get her extra wet

>>12934523
something simple with fish and mushrooms and a bit of carb like a little rice. pan-fried halibut or salmon. simple, lightweight, classy, picturesque if you present it with a little effort (bitches generally love that.) doesn't give you or her an overfull stomach if you plan on giving her the chad bangarang. image from Google search

Salmon. You can't fuck up salmon.

Asparagus and potatoes. One pan.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UyfDDglOjVI

>>12934523
Looks like you like yellow women.

Tuna or beef tataki is ez pz. Also a great way to get her ready for own raw meat.

>>12934589
I'd do this but use the grill.

>>12934588
>>12934589
These look easy and straight forward enough to pull off. I'll ask her if she like salmon then give it a practice shot tomorrow, thanks

>>12934621
Good luck.

>>12934590
I do like yellow women but this one is Scottish like me. That meal sounds good so even if I don't make it for her i'm going to try it myself. Thanks for the idea

>>12934523
god I wish this girl would go out to a nice meal with me and smile at me and laugh at my jokes and then hold my hand while we walk under the stars then we would kiss

>>12934523
Cook something before you go so we can help you through all the fuck-ups you’re gonna make. Then just take it all to hers in containers and spin her some story about how you’re a boss of cooking and just wanted to have more time to spend with her. With any luck, you’ll know how to operate a microwave at her place to heat it up.

>>12934628
;_; so ronery

>>12934523
why is she eating a vagina

>>12934584
Ah but that's the trick, isn't it, anon? Carbonara is best when it's as simple as possible. The other suggestions in this thread are excellent as well

>>12934584
You shouldn't try to get her aroused when you're alone together. That's stupid. You might both end up giving in to temptation. Have a bit of self control.

Shrimp Pasta. Easy, quick, girls love seafood. Black ink pasta with pink shrimp, red tomatoes and something green looks exceptionally nice. Just pick quality ingredients and test recipe once to get timing and plating right.

>>12934659
also good idea

>>12934663

>>12934577
If my grandmother had wheels she would have been a bike.

>>12934659
>Cook something before you go so we can help you through all the fuck-ups you’re gonna make.
this. OP, you gotta give us the blow-by-blow.

>>12934659
>>12934762
>>12935062
Okay, should I make a thread in the next few days then? Also will the meals you's have suggested be okay to do that with?

>>12935118
do what you want retard

>>12935127
just wondering if people actually make threads for that is all

>>12934523
Don’t try too hard. Women can’t cook anymore and the fact that you’re cooking at all will be impressive.

>>12935118
I wouldn't suggest doing this. She'll think you're just feeding her leftovers. If you're going to cook, make something on the simpler side so she's not just sitting around watching you fumble around the kitchen for an hour.

>>12934668
its shopped theres normal bulogi on the plate

>>12935145
they do yes, they also make threads with an image of a tomato and say "tomato"

>>12935147
I was thinking if it ends up being less on the simple side then i could practice it myself but then let her help me on the day. She was originally going to make our food anyway but then I lied about being a good cook.

>>12934523
since you've already admitted to being functionally retarded in a kitchen, do you at least own a chef's knife? if so, i'd recommend practicing on slicing cloves of garlic as thinly as possible and trying out this method of making pasta. otherwise, i guess pick up some preminced normie shit from a jar. i cannot imagine anyway you could fuck this up other than serving the pasta undercooked (ALWAYS test the pasta before taking it out of the pot. if it's crunchy, keep boiling that shit). another benefit to this is that it will make her place smell like absolute garlic heaven for the next hour or so: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-sCT8VE1ybo

>>12934981
Underrated post

>>12934981
I chuckled

>>12934523
>to impress a girl
impressions lead to accountability

>>12935215
if the lie spins out of control what's the worst that can happen? Maybe I'll be forced to actually get good at cooking, which I never would have cared for before. Can't be too bad, also I think I'll enjoy it

>>12935170
Yeah I have a few. I'm 20 I live with my parents still and they have tons of cooking stuff. I don't know if she has one but I don't want to turn up to her place with one it might seem weird

>>12935233
you can't see the forest because you're focused on the trees

>>12935118
Yeah, make an OC thread. If you preface it with you're planning on making it for some wench it will undoubtedly get massive you's. For some reason the mere sniff of a female being involved triggers /ck/.

>>12934523
Lemon garlic pasta. Simple, and you can add chicken/shrimp if she likes meat. I recommend searing thighs.

Cook the garlic cloves in olive oil. Add lemon juice and some pasta water, optionally some white wine which you can serve with the pasta. Reduce until it thickens a bit, and add a thick pad of butter. Add the pasta, chili flakes, lemon zest, some garlic powder, and a bunch of parsley to finish it off. I also like to add a little oyster sauce for color and flavor depth. Top off with parmesan when done.

It's very cheap to make and easy enough to practice a few times. Just monitor the salt levels. You probably won't need to season depending on what you decide to add. You can also melt some parmesan into crisps and serve in the pasta. Look at pro pasta to see how to plate it.

>>12935118
Yeah, go ahead and make another thread and just call it your “newb practicing” thread or whatever. We’ll know who you are. I also disagree with the faggot who said it’ll be like you giving her leftovers - it’ll be PATENTLY obvious it’s a prepared meal. But I also like the idea of her helping you; that sounds good and manly. You just need to be sure you’re that good at something that you can helpfully ‘guide’ her on in your Boss of the Kitchen role.

Go through some of the recipe ideas here (they’re all great) and then pick some to practice. None seem especially expensive to me so it won’t burn your budget.

One thing I will say though is don’t forget your sides. You want to have some nice things on the side like salads or breads or whatever. Also wine (which will depend on what you cook), shit like candles (you MUST take these - the whole thing is like you setting up a table for her so all this detail matters), and then obviously a dessert (you can always just buy this - like cute little pastries or whatever). So yeah, don’t forget all this. You can always practice your dish then take all the ingredients measured out and ready to go for when you get there. Make sure she has all the cooking equipment you’ll need to or you’ll have to take this as well.

Make some pizza, if you have a week+ you can get your starter ready, dough fermented and pizza oven set up for the big day!

>>12934523
You could just ask her what she likes and stop the stupid pretense, then cook or order that. As long as she's not some vegan cunt with an agenda then you have her bagged, enjoy.

>>12935170
i meant for practicing at home. probably a good idea to find out if she has one though.

>>12935331
Thanks man this is helpful, i didn't even think of candles but I'll definitely be doing that now. I'm going to practice pretty much everything in the thread and just have it as my meals until I go there

>>12935489
Well do flowers for the table, too, then. Ask your mum for a table cloth as well. Just do it all like in the movies, kid. Women love all that shit. Don’t forget the sides.

>>12935506
Okay sounds good. I won't forget sides, would bruschetta work? Or should it be simpler. I love brushcetta in restaraunts

>>12935551
Up to you, bud. When you do your thread just ask for ideas depending on the dish. Ignore idiots who say you’re being a fat ass. What matters with all this is the impression you give - so you must come across as manly, confident, generous and thoughtful. So no just plonking a plate of food down in front of her. It must be a whole experience for her from start to finish. You two cooking together, you making something simple but delicious, the right sides, cutlery, candles, desserts, everything.

This is not just cooking - this is you being a total package man.

>>12935263
>implying you don’t hate women

>>12935575
Thanks, I'll plan it out properly so it all works out. I've met her a few times recently and always acted the way you've said, so it should go well. I'll leave the sides to decide on when i actually make the thread for the main then. Thanks again

>>12935742
Ok, good stuff. I’ll keep an eye out.

>>12934523
dude just take her to olive garden. i hear these people like "italian" food.
>>12934577
they have carbonara at olive garden

>>12935909
We don't get that in Scotland

>>12935925
make her some haggis then

>>12934523
Cock meat and roast beef sandwich with extra mayo sauce ;)

>>12936012
not the season, it's kind of just a holiday/tourist food

>>12934523
is she literally eating a roastie vagina?

Bump for this polite OP.

>>12936475
Looks like it, probably shopped

Made my first attempt at salmon. Pretty easy to make and tasted good. The rice was really boring not sure how to improve on that

>>12939114
Cook your rice with broth instead of plain water.
Vegetable broth are amazing for rice accompanying fish.

>>12939206
Okay thanks I'll make sure to do that next time. I knew something was missing

>>12939221
Even better, sautee rinsed rice in oil, onions, and some garlic. Then cook as usual in stock seasoned with salt, pepper, and spices. If you can get it, bloom a little saffron in warm water and throw that in there, too.

>>12939250
>Even better, sautee rinsed rice in oil, onions, and some garlic. Then cook as usual in stock seasoned with salt, pepper, and spices. If you can get it, bloom a little saffron in warm water and throw that in there, too.

This, make something like a simple pilaf. The general recipe I use is Alton Browns rice pilaf. The thing with the wet rag is weird but it works, you have to trust.

>>12939250
>>12939271
Appreciate it. I'll look up that recipe. Also I think my parents have some saffron

>>12934523
Learn to make a pan sauce, one glazed vegetable dish, and one carby side dish. Make your life easy and just stick your girls favorite protein in the oven on low with lots of butter and a couple herbs and spices that she doesn't find gross.

>>12939114
Rice is stupid easy to improve, you could make risotto, rice and beans, or just season it with various flavors to complement your protein. Lime rice for mexican, coconut rice for thai, saffron rice for arab, curried rice for indian, fried rice for "chinese"

>>12939310
This sounds good even just for practice, cheers

>>12939310
Yeah I've never been happy with my spanish/mexican rice cooked traditionally so I'm going to try a risotto using the same flavors. Rice is absolutely the most flexible carb.

>>12939114
That's way too much rice mate; less rice, more broccoli. Make some dill sour cream for the salmon and layer it like rice, salmon, sour cream. broccoli on the side.

>>12934628
God that sounds good

>>12939114
>yes, I'll have the broccollini

>>12939114
main problems
>>12939868 too much rice for the plate
>>12939310 >>12939868 nothing on the salmon nothing under it. the layering idea is decent but just so long as you do *something* it'll be better. you don't need to use sour cream you could go with pan sauce (or both) and maybe garnish with a little parsley or something.


note that these criticisms really only apply because you're specifically trying to impress someone. cooking for myself, I'd be psyched to make something with too much rice and lazy presentation. but people (most people) are 50% visual when judging a dish

>>12939206
OP, just to assist here on the rice recommendations and as I’m also U.K. based so I know what you have access to: you can use the Knorr stock pots for this. The little jelly ones. Get veggie or chicken flavour, pop that in hot water to melt then use that as the base. It’s a cheat but it’ll save you having to make a broth from scratch if you’d rather focus on other things.

The salmon looks great, by the way. You could also make a lemon butter sauce for it that would go really well with the rice. Agree with all the other posts following on otherwise.

>>12940612
Never heard of Knorr I'll look for it in Tesco next time I go. Thank you, I think I'll make this my new hobby. I'll see how the next week goes anyway

>>12940728
These things. They’ll definitely have them in tescos. I find them really handy as they melt in hot water very easily (not like the old crumbly stock cubes). You can get different flavours like beef, rich beef (which I use a lot for things like stews or casseroles), chicken and veggie. They’re pretty intense too so one is definitely enough for a big pot of rice.

>>12940762
thanks mate, definitely recognise that logo from the shops. I'll test the chicken and veggie one out and see what works better with the salmon dish. Then maybe try some of the more complicated suggestions after

>>12940786
Ok, bud. Also, I liked this suggestion: >>12939250. It reminds me a little of the Middle Eastern pine nut rice you can do that goes great with chicken. Not sure if anyone gave you chicken recommendations and I wouldn’t do this with fish, but if you do have a chicken one and looking for a side then it’s excellent.

So, same story. Cook your rice in a broth (or stock pot). Chicken or veggie flavour. Drain, rinse off. In a pan add oil, heat up at medium to high heat, add finely minced garlic and finely chopped onion, and a generous amount of pine nuts. Fry the pine nuts until they’re toasted, lower the heat, add a couple of table spoons of butter, then add your cooked rice and stir until the rice has warmed up and absorbed all the butter. You should aim for equal distribution of the butter and pine nuts but it should not be greasy. Saffron is a good addition to this for flavour and colour too. Plate immediately.

So, that’s one suggestion on rice if you want to do a chicken dish as it goes perfectly with it, along with a nice white wine reduction chicken gravy.

>>12940844
That sounds amazing my mouth is watering haha. Shame it's 2am

>>12940903
Well, I look forward to seeing more. You’re doing great so far. All of /ck/ is gonna be on tenterhooks when date night comes, believe me.

>>12934523
you're not going to learn to cook well enough to fool her in a week, you fucking liar.

>>12940924
Thanks me too, pretty comfy board

>>12940927
You must go back.

>>12940937
to where, reality? doesn't matter, he's going to strike out with her anyways.

>>12940927
I don't usually lie, it was just in the moment and I know I fucked up but I never would have gotten into cooking if it wasn't for that, and I'm enjoying it now so I don't really care. She's the type of girl who would be happy even if it wasn't that great, but if I tried my hardest.

>>12940951
Strike out? What do you mean by that? She's letting me stay at her place and she shows that she's into me and likes me. It's pretty likely she will end up being my gf either way. I just want to impress her and make her something nice and everyone else in the thread has been helpful

>>12940973
Just ignore the jealous arsehole.

>>12940612
>>12940728
>>12940762
https://youtu.be/blrNxVyNgPs

>>12934523
hahahaha that girl looks like she is biting into a vagina
hahahaha
that reminds me of the video where the dog ate the dudes crotch

>>12941497
Link to video?

>>12941500
sorry man but this is 4channel
no gore here ;)

>>12934523
yum, fried pig pussy

>>12941497
Never seen that, that's fucking gross

Any updates, OP?

>>12945148
Been busy today but going to try one of the rice ideas tomorrow, not sure I'll make it a salmon dish since I just had that but it's more just so I can work on my rice game. I think I've mostly got the salmon part down

>>12945592
Ok, cool. And yeah, if you’re good with one, no need to keep repeating it. We can do a final test run just before.

>>12945592
Is that you? You're fairly passable aside from the hands.

>>12934577
>>can't fuck Carbonara up

???

>>12934523
F R E N C H
O N I O N
S O U P

>>12946379
yeah you can fuck the eggs into an omelette if you're not careful

>>12945939
That and the man shoulders you mean

Good shrimp scampi is very impressive, easy to cook, relatively cheap, and doesn't rely on her kitchen having any special tools or good pans.

Pepper flake, pasta, lemon, butter, parsley, salt, shrimp, white wine (you drink the rest) that's it.

It looks incredible and tastes great and is baby easy

>>12948475
> deep fried shrimp

Not a good idea to impress for a date cooking night

Up you go, little thread...

>>12934981
Gino at his finest

>>12945939
no, it's a blasian

>>12948475
I'm allergic to shrimp sadly, I actually love the taste