/ck/ - Food & Cooking

that sucks

>>12619763
This is what happens when you let people buy straws without first getting a loicense, baka

>>12619777
trips of truth

>>12619777
trips confirm

Not the first time. They had a model whore get one driven upwards while she was snorting cocaine when her bodyguard attacked someone who was getting too close to her.

>>12619777
trips of death

>>12619763
Bongistan Nights.

so if plastic straws are now banned and metal straws fucking kill people, what's the alternative
>inb4 paper
that shit gets soggy and ineffective real quick

>>12620017
Just drink out of the cup you fucking sissy.

>>12619763
>World News
>Metal Straw Death
No one in Asia is retarded enough to die on a chopstick, how is this news?

>>12620017
Glass straws made out of the same glass car windshields are made from

>>12619777
ahaha bloody 'ell now this is comedy

>>12619763
I thought it said she fell into the straw for a solid minute and now I feel bad for laughing.

>>12619763
Imagine not being able to drink out of a straw lmao

>>12620250
>he doesn't use industrial size metal straws

>>12619763
I imagine she was sipping a drink while walking and just faceplanted, damn thing probably rippen right through the canvas

>>12620286
quite frankly I'm probably going to lift this gag

>>12620020
Fucking this. Why were straws invented in the first place?

>>12619763
If anyone needed proof that the Brits cannot be trusted with anything.

look it up
(((she))) was a lesbian and from the pics very likely a tranny
nigga look like roy batty
OH NO NO NO

>>12620303
straws were invented so women didn't get their lipstick on the rim of a glass

>>12620017
wooden/paper/bamboo straws

>>12620406
odd, that doesn't prevent them getting their lipstick on my dick

>>12620017
Paper is already being villified for using too much water to produce

>>12620017
Silicone straws?

>>12620017
The alternative is stop drinking soda and kill all soda companies.

Imagine drinking through a small tube

>>12619768
What you did there, I see it

>>12619785
That was a Steven Segal movie>>12620051
>Glass straws made out of the same glass car windshields are made from

I have two issues with permanent straw alternatives.

One is cleanliness. I'm not scrubbing down a straw inside and out, with a special brush, a bleach dip, and putting it in the dishwasher for bleach or high steam disinfecting. I mostly use straws for a sippable iced coffee with cream all day. It's dairy.

You can't tell if a metal straw got clean. Metal has memory.
My main issue with a metal straw has to do with chipping one's teeth, especially for a drink you might consume while driving over that road hazard or quick braking. It does seem silly that oh, when would you ever miss your mouth, like who has horrible aim like that, but I bump a straw around all the time. It's a high probability. Talk to any dentist about people who have metal tongue piercings, and their teeth are damaged from them all the time. There can and will be times you aren't cognizant and in control to the level that your teeth are protected. It's your front teeth. Mine are natural and I'd like them to stay intact and perfect.

>>12620297
its all yours my friend :)

>>12619763
Don't be a clown. Pass that straw to the law.

>>12619763
Probably snorting coke with the straw and faceplanted onto the table.

>>12619763
for real though I'm surprised nobody has gotten deathly ill from improperly washing and then drinking out of their dirty metal straw yet.
It's gotta be a real pain in the ass to wash out that little tube, I bet all kinds of gross shit can grow in there.

>>12619763
Anybody who uses a straw should die, I mean if you are such a fucking slime that you need to suck your drink up through some fucking tube and cant just sip out of a cup like normal person, there is zero hope for you and you honestly shouldnt exist.

>>12619763
Reports are coming in she didn't have a license for that straw anyway. False alarm everyone.

>>12619763
lol this is some final destination shit wtf

>>12620017
Red vines, they taste just the same too!

>>12621469
Shut up you n-word red vines are delishy.

>>12620017
stop drinking out of straws, what are you a fag that needs something long in your mouth while you drink

Oh god I just ordered some metal straws off amazon too because I use a new plastic one everyday and it feels like a waste.
They’re scheduled to arrive this evening, should I just not answer the door you guys?

100 people are killed in the US each year by pen lids

>>12620431
What about people with allergies you fuck?

can’t we just grow clone sea turtles and go back to regular plastic straws?

My sister has one and it comes with a pipecleaner brush, like why the fuck would you even bother with extra clean up just to drink from a fancy straw? Fucking zoomer shit

>>12619763
>not inserting the straw into your ass after each use
it's like you want to commit suicide

>>12620406
it's better to drink coffee/soda through a straw

>>12620425
you shove a straw in your dick?

>>12620705
If you are worried about cleaning straws you are using them way to often. But keep thinking sucking on plastic is any better with your frequency

>>12621686
other way around :^)

>>12620431
I use those! Mine are super thicc, they look like boba straws. They make me laugh cause they look like that one sonichu panel.

>>12621586
Just cancel the order and get silicone.

>>12620017
Coca Cola got popular in a period when paper was the only option. Coca Cola remains the most popular soda to this day. Even then they knew how to make paper water resistant. It only takes a little wax. Plastic didn't become the norm because it was better for the consumer. It became the norm because the conglomerate corporations were cucking the world to improve their bottom line. You just sound like an idiot who has never even used a paper straw. So fuck you and I hope you die before the year is over, shithead.

OI M8 U GOT A LOICENSE FO' THAT STROOOW?

>>12620025
I bet like a dozen people die from chopsticks per year, but Asian countries don't have the sort of retarded journalists the West has, and every Asian journalist upon hearing of a chopsticks death shrugs "How is this news?" as they should.

Western journalists would consider chopstick deaths newsworthy but they won't report them because it might be considered culturally insensitive.

>>12620017
Thick platic straws

>>12620406
Some handicapped and seniors require straws

>>12621437
Might as well kill yourself before you become elderly and too weak to lift a cup

>>12620017
>what's the alternative

>>12621659
>fancy
The point is to have one straw and reuse it for life rather than throwing dozens of plastic straws in the ocean every week.

But of course, no one tells you the actual bulk of microplastics pollution in the ocean is from putting polyester clothes in the wash.

>>12621586
You might wanna shoot the dilivery man on sight. You really dont want those staws anywhere near your house.

>>12622268
can paper straws bend and have that little extendable section at the top? if not, they're shit tier and deserved to be replaced by plastic

>a falling
Do bongs really talk like this?

>>12620406
If they would let me feed them like a mother bird they wouldn't need straws.

>Not biting the ends off licorice and using it as a straw

>>12619763
Why do healthy people use straws in the first place? They're sippy cups for adults.

>>12622943
So you can use shitty plastic/paper cups and still drive. Also you can blow in them to mix up the booze.

>>12620286
Do Americans really?

if a straw comes near me I will fucking kill myself

>>12622943
>>12620303
This >>12623033
So you can still walk/drive/etc while drinking. The same reason why squeezes are a thing.

There are LITERALLY biodegradable/compostable plastic straws:
https://www.amazon.com/Biodegradable-Compostable-Plant-Based-Eco-Friendly-Individually/dp/B078J4N5XF

They're slightly more than regular plastic straws or paper, but are more eco-friendly.

This was NEVER about being green.
this was a scam where they wanted to charge $0.05 for special straws like they do now with plastic bags.

>>12619763
This is on the same level of bullshit death as Steve Erwins

>>12620290
It was put through a hole in a metal lid. Some medical commentator on the case mentioned that if it hadn't been braced by the lid it would probably have just moved out of the way when she fell.

>>12619777
Simple as

>>12620705
>Metal has memory.

>>12621915
Damn bro, your dick fit inside a straw?

>>12619763
BAN ASSAULT STRAWS.
GUNS DON'T KILL PEOPLE, METAL STRAWS DO.

Question: why THE FUCK would you ever need a straw anyway?

>>12623545
Don't tell me you're out there gulping milkshakes and iced drinks like an animal

>>12623545
I honestly could not tell you the last time I used a straw.
It must be years at the very least.

>>12620017
reed

>>12619763
I thought it said falling into a metal straw

>>12623545
So you can drink and drive without getting your drinking vessel in front of your vision

>>12621682
just brush your teeth lmao

>>12619777
We are both part of the suicidal neoliberal imperialist agenda anon

>>12620705
I have piercings around my mouth and can confirm

>>12622261
Hott

>>12619763
Why the hell do you need a metal straw

>>12622603
you ever been kicked in the stomach so hard you throw up??

>>12625778
Are you challenging me brudda

>>12623545
Slurpees.

>>12619763
Hah, she was probably so fat that she punctured her artery after she fell

>>12626577
Imagine being the guy that has to push out the tube of meat encased in the straw

>>12620286
His mouth isn't so big and he isn't a vacuum unlike you, fat cunt

>>12619763
Cant we just make like, semi-flexible but firm aluminum ones? That way if someone falls on it, itll just crush flat.

>>12621607
They are such a small portion of the population it doesn’t really matter.

>>12626643
You know what other material would be good for a soft-but-rigid straw?
Plastic.

>>12619777
Blessed trips

>>12619777
oi e’s roight

>>12626651
This isn't the place to bring up transgenders, anon

>>12626805
They wanna ban em though for micro plastics being poison to ppl. Or something gay. We're looking for plastic alternatives, anon.

>>12619768
good one

Reminds me of that grandma that tripped and fell onto a knitting needle when she was walking up the steps to her knitting circle meeting. The needle went into her heart but she survived, and the doctors found and treated breast cancer she didn't know she had.

>>12620975
What are pipe brushes?

>>12627034
That’s cool.
Every cloud I guess.

>>12619763
Clearly she was murdered by her lesbian partner.

OBEY THE LAW, BIN THAT STRAW

>>12620017
Not being a moron and being careful when using a metal straw

>>12620017
sip cup

>>12621833
>bartenders don't exist

>>12619777
Okay, not this is epic.

>>12620017
Licorice!

>>12619763
So you want to ban scissors because morons run with them points facing up, fall and stab themselves?

>>12620303
For people who can't drink out of cups for medical reasons.

>Get stabbed with straw
>Star is a perfect blood funnel
>Bleed out even faster than with a knife

>>12625649
Degenerate.

>>12619763
If you’re enough of an idiot you can kill yourself with anything.

I like my metal straws. They’re gold and I feel like god damn royalty whenever I go out for coffee.

>>12628060
Looks more like straw tempered steel m8, you sure that's gold?

>>12628376
I know they’re not actually made of gold asshole, gold is also a color. I am fairly certain they’re stainless steel.

Unfortunately the gold has kinda dulled out since people in this house keep putting them in the dishwasher. Always hand wash.

>>12628376
>>12628563
They are steel. You can order them from China for like 30 cents each.

>>12620017
bamboo?

>>12628573
Where do you get them that cheap outside of bulk retailers? I got a pack of 8 on Amazon for $10, oops.

>>12625876
How do you wear this in Africa and not die of heat stroke?

>>12628563
>hand is white
I'm genuinely surprised.

>>12628594
You need to buy them from something like Aliexpress and buy about 10 of them. Shipping should be free though.

>>12628563
>puts his brass straws on the counter after a messy smoothie and gets mad when his mommy doesn't delicately polish away the chocolate residue with a pipe cleaner
Fucking rinse them yourself, then.

>>12628563
>gold is also a color
yeh but that's straw color m8.

>>12628601
I'm more surprised that hand is thin and patio is nice.

>>12626892
There’s far more transgenders than people with real silicone allergies.

>>12619777
heh.

>>12628601
>thinking anyone other than wh*toids would give a shit about bpas or fucking straws ruining the environment

>>12628595
Areas of Africa are incredibly pleasant. South Africa along the coast is between 50-80F (10-27C) year round.

>>12621586
Imagine being such a fruit that you carry a straw around with you
>b-but muh environment!
Every time I come across a plastic straw dispenser I grab a fistful and throw them in the nearest storm drain

>>12622927
Sure they can. You can fold paper into a scrunched up accordion shape just as well as plastic. Might not survive as many bendings as plastic, but then again, I have never managed to make a plastic straw break apart without intentionally going for it.

>>12628714
but the picture makes it look like he's in sunny scrubland.

>>12628700
I’m that anon and the reason why I got them is because I hate using paper straws. They outlawed plastic straws here and most places aren’t willing to pay for bamboo ones.

Sure the eco-friendly part of it is nice but if I called myself an environmentalist I’d be lying.

>>12628878
>They outlawed plastic straws here
fucking what

>>12628827
>Every time I come across a plastic straw dispenser I grab a fistful and throw them in the nearest storm drain
Fucking based.

>>12629357
Washington DC

>>12628827
What, you didn't grab a nearby sea turtle or dolphin and cram those straws right down their throats? You a hippy?

>>12619763
Thanks for naming my band.

>>12619763
Just drink from the cup strawfags

>>12622259
chris, for fucks sake

Misread as "Death Metal Straw"

>>12622282
I think it's more deadly to use fork than chopstick...

>>12622599
Jokes on you I already plan on killing myself if I ever get so old that I need assistance for everything

>>12630193
>bothering to touch the animals
Real men just shoot them.

Did anyone have stab himself with a fork?

You think there was a narrow cylinder of flesh in the straw after she fell on it?

>>12623541

>>12628060
Seems like there's a lot more plastic in the cup and lid... and packaging, and petroleum from shipping ...

>>12632033
See >>12628878

>>12632064
The fuck? Why did they outlaw plastic straws?
>inb4 see >>12630163
That's not an answer

>>12632070
A lot of cities (and places around the world in general) are taking baby steps to better the environment. It’s not the first silly law like that that’s been passed, by a long shot.

>>12619763
She was a fat bull dyke so fuck her. If you're so fucking retarded you can't drink from a straw without dying you're literally just a fucking retard.

>>12632206
>to better the environment
probably more like 'to improve PR image'
>>12622918
>the actual bulk of microplastics pollution in the ocean is from putting polyester clothes in the wash.

If they really wanted to promote change, they'd levy a hefty tax on single-use plastics. I'd vote for it, especially if they provided a tax benefit for purchasing things like reusable shopping bags. The fact of the matter is, people will say they care, but they'll vote with their wallets. I doubt anything could be done about clothing until alternatives are available, but there's literally no reason to use plastic cups except that they're cheaper.

imagine being such a fag you feel like straws are a necessity. unless you're a paraplegic just drink out of the cup like an adult.
also if you manage to accidentally kill yourself with a straw you didn't deserve to live to begin with.

>>12632261
quadriplegic*

>>12619777
Straw license when?

>>12619763
are br*tish people retarded?
>go to hotel
>jump off balcony and die
>go to pub
>get pissed, collapse in street, get hit by bus
>go to restaurant
>trip over your own cankles
>fall onto metal straw
>die
is this the power of inbred island genetics?
>>12620017
DRINK LIKE A NORMAL HUMAN BEING WITHOUT PUTTING A FAGGY COCK REPLACEMENT IN YOUR MOUTH TO SUCK ON
100 YEARS AGO STRAWS DIDN'T EVEN EXIST
what the fuck

>>12620705
>Metal has memory.
Is that why surgeons use it, then, genius?

>>12620017
I'm trying to understand the whole straw thing. Why are they banned? are straws really a pollution competitor to mexico and china dumping manufacturing process water and shit in the oceans/rivers?

I've not felt the need to use a straw since i was a 5 year old boy at a birthday party, do a lot of people really use straws daily?
Is this some kind of fucking meme? I see 30ish year old women going on about it on fakebook, is it mostly women who use straws to quench their thirst of "sucking" when no dick is available?
The whole thing is fucking bizarre to me.

>>12633244
It's a PR stunt. The US government does this shit all the time because they think we're too stupid to notice.
>"We're destroying the planet and people seem to dislike that"
>"Can we get people to stop using straws?"
>"Probably, but wh...."
>"Blame the straws!"

Beautiful day for a green tea sipped from a golden straw, eh lads?

>>12620020
>>12620303
I'm not drinking my fucking margarita without a straw fuck sakes

>>12622603
Twizzlers

>>12633529
Applebees beat you to it

>>12620705
>for a drink you might consume while driving over that road hazard or quick braking.
I'm pretty sure metal straws are meant for drinks like B-52, not as a drop-in replacement for plastic draws.

That was just the universe getting revenge for the turtles.

>>12619763
fuig

>>12619763
It would be almost impossible to replicate this absurd freak accident. The woman in question had fixed the straight metal straw (rather than one of the more conventional bent ones) into the metal lid on a mason jar, and then collapsed directly on top of it because of an old spinal injury.

If she happened to have been holding a kitchen knife point-up, it would have killed her too.

>>12634148
first some hippie shoves a straw up a turtles nose to ruin plastic straws and now metal straws will get banned because some idiot tripped

>>12635660
>first some hippie shoves a straw up a turtles nose
No one would do that. Fuck off.

>>12633428
If you drink it with a straw you won't get the taste of the salt on the rim. Without the salty and the sweet and the sour it isn't a margarita, it is just an alcoholic slurpee.

>>12635807
a person with good intentions can justify a lie just as easy as a person with bad intentions.

How does a bit of floating plastic in the ocean get jammed deep up a nose? What would propel it up there?

>>12619777
kek

>>12619763
Do bongs really?

>>12619768
here's your (YOU)

>>12619763
Just don't use straws in general, you're not a fucking 5 year old.

>>12619763
wtf is wrong with the british

Murrica. Idiocracy.

>>12619763
>using a straw
sucks to be you

>>12637596
>if this was
Nice Canadian grammar

>>12637596
technically they are still giving you that warning, they are just being cheeky on how they tell you.

stupid canada.

>>12637596
Canadians have almost as diabolical a sense of humor as bongs.

>>12637596
rent free