/ck/ - Food & Cooking

>>12494267
Gross. That has mold on it you disgusting Eurofag.

The only cheeses I can't abide are the ones that smell like toejam, and the ones that are half-eaten by maggots.
And anything American.

>>12494267
>Cheese is a kind of meat.
That's not what both the Torah and our sages say!

>>12494283
yeah but you suck the blood from baby boy's mutilated penises

>>12494267
obligatory tête de moine posting

>>12494287
Not true. Provide sources from either the written or oral Torah that instruct us to do so! You're spreading lies, and creating hate for a particular type of cuisine.

There's hair on it, ew

>>12494267
how about a nipple cake sandwich?

>>12494267
A tasty yellow beef

I just did some cheese shopping yesterday. I was out of cheese, and I kinda went nuts at the cheese shop.
>Stilton
>parm reg
>mature cheddar
>1000 day gouda
>truffled ricotta
>D'Affinois
>Comte
The truffled ricotta was an impulse buy, but it tasted really good.

>>12494374
>Mature cheddar
>Not vintage cheddar
You done fucked up anon.

>>12494408
my man
vintage somerset cheddar is the GOAT cheese
this is objective fact.

>>12494408
>>12494456
Depends on what you're eating it with or using it for. Different cheeses for different applications, anons.

>>12494510
No.

>>12494529
based

In my fridge right now:
>Manchego
>Parmesan Reggiano
>Asiago
>Feta
>Dubliner cheddar

>>12494299
Baby Penises?

>>12494740
again where are the proofs versus minhagim?

Imagine only having half a penis. LMAO

>>12494267
T-there's a hair on your cheese

>>12494722
V E R S A T I L E

>>12494850
holy fuck aaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhh

>>12495096
Forgot to add the goat cheese. I like cheese.

My personal GOAT. It tastes like vomit and unwashed hair, but in the best possible way.

>>12494850
It's been over a decade on this site, and I never fail to be impressed by the keen eyes of some anons. How the fuck did you notice that? Did you open the full image and zoom in on the cheese?

>>12494850
Impressive

>>12494850
Keen eye

>>12494267
>Cheese is a kind of meat.
>Let's milk it from our teat.
I get this reference

>>12494722
In mine:
>Manchego
>Parmesean Reggiano
>Kerrygold Dubliner
>Hickory Smoked Cheddar

>>12495433
It's real fukken obvious senpai

>>12494850
VERY VERY BASED.

Eating some homemade cashew nut cheese.

How come brie cheese smells like cum

>>12495750
get out

>>12495771
clean the cum out of your nose, and your ass

cheddar or gtfo

>>12494267
based haircheese poster

>>12494267
Did you also know that piss is filtered blood? Eurofags are drinking unfiltered piss.

>>12494529
Yes, faggot.

>>12494267
chad and cheesepilled

Wisconsin makes the best cheese in the World.
Our sharp white cheddar is unsurpassed. Cope.

>>12496915
Lol.....LOL.....LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL....
HAHAHAHAHAHA........AAAAAHHHHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.........LOLLOLOL.....giggles giggles....

>>12496953
>t. brie snorting eurofag

>>12496915
Amerilards actually believe this. Your country makes the worst "cheese" in the entire world.

>>12497142
>>12496953
neither of you have ever had wisconsin cheese. You're just buying into a meme because hate for america is all you have to cling on to in your pathetic existence.

>>12497185
Lol, even Americans know Wisconsin doesn't make the best cheese, you cheddar-headed faggot.

>>12497209
>non-american trying to tell me americans believe

yeah OK nigger

>>12497215
Sorry to burst your fragile beliefs, dipshit, but I'm more American than you.

>>12497415
t. yuropoor

>>12497443
>this much denial
Can't handle the truth, huh?

>>12494267
Woah!
The Cheese People know I browse 4chan and now are assaulting me with more Cheese!

I'll be honest, I'm sitting on the fence ready to dive into cheese making, I just don't want to mess up badly like I did with Rock Hounding.

I'll let /ck/ decide.

Would you try a 30 year old amateur artisan cheese?

I have ideas for Mozzarella, Dairy, Chedder and Gouda.

The Dairy+Mozzarella is especially genius...
You see, for Basic Dairy Cheese, you use
Diary Fresh (or Whole non UHT Store) Milk+Vinegar+Salt. This creates a very basic cheese that can be pressed and served for a snack.

However, in the creation of this cheese, you have Cheese Whey that can be used as a Rennet substitute.

By a similar method, you could take the same Milk+Salt, but add in the Whey and some Citric Acid for Mozzarella.

Chedder and Gouda need specific cultures and age, so not a good fast cheese, but if you want literally infinite Cheese works, make Basic+Mozzarella.

If you grow Tomatoes/Lemons/Limes/Grapes/Oranges, you have ez access to Citric Acid.

>>12497517
Just get a kit and try making farmhouse cheddar. You will see if it is for you.

>>12497531
But I don't want to buy a kit, I want to homebrew cheese.

>>12496915
Nope, just.....nope nope nope

>>12497533
>But I don't want to buy a kit, I want to homebrew cheese.
But the kits are for homebrew cheese?
The whey left over from citric acid cheese isn't really suitable for rennet. You want to use a culture-based enzyme for that.

>>12497555
No no, The Whey from Dairy Cheese (Milk+Vinegar+Salt) for Mozzarella (Milk+Whey+Citric+Salt)

I wouldn't use Mozza Whey as a Rennet for Cheddar/Gouda, that's just wasting time and taste.

As per cheese cultures and rennet goes, it's not that hard to make your own if you know how to make a Culture Mother, and you have plenty of Nettles in your general area.

The same could be said of Vinegar Mothers, they aren't that hard to create once you know how to make them.

Kits aren't bad, just expensive in the long run. [Especially cultures]

>>12494283
>our sages

I'm a Jew, and fuck right the fuck off. I'd prefer the red river of blood to flow over not being a great cook. Rabbis are fucking scam-artists and so are Christian priests.

>You're unholy no give me money to bless your food!

Fuck off.

>>12497584
SSS
Start Simple, Stupid

>>12494272
I'm more disturbed by the human hair on it.

>>12496850
>The truth is, even animals don't like him
That is savage.

>>12497622
but what I've stated is simple, I don't feel like paying money to follow someone elses directions and then say "Oh, this is mine" when I've created none of the ingrediants.

Think of it like Sodastream vs Homemade Soda.
Why would I want to pay 60 dollars for a machine that uses 20$ carbonators, and demands a 6 dollars syrup bottle, when I can make my own jug of Syrup for less than 5 dollars, and purchase a bottle of 2L Unflavored Selzter for 99 cents, (59 cents on sale day)?

I mean yeah sure, it's helpful if you want something that is already "confirmed to work" but I don't think I could ever consider myself satisified unless I made it from scratch, rather than putting the assembly pieces together.

In a weird sense, just because you put together a table via instructions and parts, doesn't mean you made it. The ownership and likewise joy comes from doing it from scratch.

What I've thought about is the simplest way to enter semi blind, semi knowledgable, and still feel proud of myself, even if the first few batches taste like feet and poop.

>>12497679
Pre assembled kits/packages simply lack soul, others are content with "Work makes Soul" but I am not. Perhaps this is why I failed at Rock Hounding, because I simply did not want to conform to an artisan craft that demands conformity to succeed in.

It's sad really, I have about 25 pounds of polished gemstones that are lovingly crafted, polished and shined, however a single one is nowhere near as beautiful or valuable as a single piece of Pre conformed set of gemstones.

Get this, I have a palm sized banded Amythest merged with a Rose Quartz. It's quite the beauty. However, because it is not cut to standard, and due to the "amatuer status" of the find, cut, and polish [aka not a member of a dick jerking circle of liscensed jewlers] the most I can sell it for is about 5~10 dollars, unset. If I decide to grind it down, or find a bezel to set it into, I can sell it for 15~20$.

Meanwhile I have a Pre-worked 2500 carat piece of Labrodite with perfect sheen and yellow+purple+red irridescence that was chemically veneered that can easily be sold for 400~1200$ depending on the buyer.

This is what defeated me and made me realize that Rock Hounding is a world of recipie and formula that MUST be adhered to.

(Seriously though, the Labradrite is a beaut and weighs 6 bloody pounds. The vendor was selling it for 40 bucks. He really didn't understand the value of it. Imagine selling a gold bar for -2000% of its market value)

>>12497679
You going to jack off the bull to inseminate the mother of the cow you'll milk for your cheese? Please, dude. You are severly overcomplicating things. Start simple. See if you are even capable of following the simple rules with simple ingredients, and get an acceptible product, before you start spazzing out over inventing a recipe woth home-grown ingredients. Very different cheeses are produced by the smallest differences. 3 degrees of temperature for 15 minutes makes a different product. Don't be afraid to work with available knowledge to start.
Or just go jacking off bulls.

>>12497760
No no, you took it the wrong way.

I simply feel like doing it Non-kit, vs actual kit, but going in with knowledge in doing so, and learn/improvise as I go along.

>>12497739
You should try selling them on Etsy, you could probably get more than you think for them.

>>12497807
That'd be nice, never really ventured into Etsy mostly because I'm scared that I'm a "Super amateur".

I have a semi translucent Amazonite that is cut to look like a little car. I also have a Red Jasper Heart, and a polished Obsidian dagger head. Heck, those aren't even my favorite, my favorite one is a ruby lady bug, with topaz spots!

>>12497775
You are setting yourself up to fail, just like you did with rockhounding. You are imagining that you will have professional results with amateur experience and knowledge. You will be frustrated with your results, and since you started with a dozen possible points of failure, instead of two, solving the problems won't be fun; it will be aggravating. Was it the rennet? The heat? The milk? The acid? The culture? Will you blame failures on some on some invisible cheese mafia instead of accepting you didn't have the wisdom to work with existing, available knowledge? Because it "lacks soul"? Making good cheese is difficult without you making it more difficult for yourself.

>>12497828
So I should buy a kit instead rather than try?

>>12494456
Is somerset cheese exported from the isles?

>>12497834
Yeah.

>>12497832
It has less to do with the kit than with the attitude. If you do not get a kit, at least follow an existing recipe to the letter. Limit your possibilities for failure. Make one batch of tasty cheese before you make a batch with "soul"
At least you can then fall back on your [limited] success.

>>12497840
That was the plan as per "Going forward with some knowledge"

Is it possible for you to mail your cynicism? It would be a good substitute for Citric Acid.

>>12497598
This is why moshiach is not here. Make teshuva. I am wishing you the best; may you get back on the correct derech!

>>12497859
You asked for advice, I gave it. You pine over the fact that you get amateur results from your amateur mistakes and instead of learning or growing from them, you give up -- and then explain how you plan on making every amateur mistake you can. Treating my forewarnings as cynicism isn't a good sign. Either start accepting advice or show more fortitude in your interests.

>>12496915
this. Eurofags can only cope.>>12496953
>>12497142
>>12497209
>>12497415

t. Europoors that live in a dilapidated stone kuk shed.

>stinks up your whole fridge

>>12497679
man, i wish i had even one friend that made as much clear logical sense as you
based marieposter

best cheese coming through

>>12500033
That is bread, retard

>>12500039
it's smoked cheese you pleb

>>12494267
Y da wypipo love cheese ayo

>>12500056
why are you envious of the white man's extensive list of technological and cultural accomplishments?

>>12500061
You mean that he stole from indigenous PoC?

>>12500061
Shieeeet dis mayne usin bigol ejukationedable wordz ayo y u b talkin cray cray?

>>12500061
Lol, white people didn't invent cheese.

>>12500122
nobody wants to eat your fermented yak cheese you stunted steppenigger

Anyone /calvados/ here
Nothing's better than drinking a great glass of wine and eating a cracker with this shit on it.
While some say it tastes vile, I'll have you know I entirely agree, but it's the kind of vile that's really tasty.

>>12500122
They perfected it

Bros I got some edam cheese and it tastes very bitter. I don't know if this is normal as I don't know much about cheese

>>12496915
your cheese isn't even made from milk. even if it were, those transgendered cows give shit milk.

>>12500349
Guess how I know you've never had Wisconsin cheddar
>b-b-but kraft singles!!!
Those are more pasta than cheese.

>>12500365
nice try WCIDF

>>12496801
All piss is filtered via the kidneys

I get like 30% of my daily calories from cheese. Will cheese be my death?

Does anyone else eat ricotta out of the container?

Vegan nut cheese is based and superior. Get fucked pus eaters.

>>12500142
bruh

>>12500320
edam should not be bitter

What is it with women and hating Bloo Cheese? Anyone else notice this shit?

>>12500527
I got some nut cheese for your gf to snack on

>>12501099
This. They swallow cum all the damn time but when I eat some blue cheese my gf starts to gag.

>>12501099
I've met a few women who don't like it, but all the women in my family, and my gf likes it, so yeah, not ALL women hate it. I also know a lot of guys who hate it. My best friend from high school would literally freak out and go sit across the room when we'd eat blue cheese. So it's not just a female thing.

>>12497739
>Imagine selling a gold bar for -2000% of its market value
>-2000%

>>12494267
>go into the woods
>find a fallen tree with mouldy bark
>take my beacon blue out of backpack
>display on said tree
>take photograph and post on mongolian goat-herding forum /chee/ general thread
I'm just curious as to why someone choose that location for their cheese photoshoot

>>12494267
Post your cheese nationality tier-list. Here's mine:
>S-tier: Polish, Italian
>A-tier: German, Dutch
>B-tier: British, Spanish, Danish etc.
>C-tier: American, Irish
>Absolutely Haram-tier: French
Fight me, eurofags

>>12501600
Because of this post I realized there's a little hair on it. Ew. Wtf.

>>12501624

Fucking fag.

I would literally massacre an entire village if it meant I had an unlimited lifetime supply of Saint-Félicien cheese. The first time I tried it, it tasted like old spoiled milk dug out of the garbage, but I ate it to be polite. The next day, being very confused in a foreign country where I barely spoke the language, I accidentally reached for it again thinking it was a different cheese. I tried not to show my embarrassment and ate it with the best face I could manage. Somehow, it became my all time favorite cheese I've ever had over the course of the next several months. Sometimes I can find ones that remind me of it at Whole Foods. I want it so fucking bad I might have to drive to Whole Foods tomorrow for the next best thing.

>>12498390
Denial ain't a river in Egypt, cowfucker.

>>12497142
American here from New England, people usually cream themselves over French cheeses, goat cheese, and international cheese in general. But my extended family who were formerly farmers and not highly educated/exposed to foreign stuff always serve cubed cheddar, flavorless government-style swiss cubes, and other American cheeses along with kielbasa, Ritz crackers, and Bud heavy. I probably have a soft spot for those things having grown up with them at family gatherings, but the only time I buy American cheese is deli American cheese slices for burgers. I love and defend my country on many things, but our cheese does not compare to other countries.

Ate a small block of this recently. Extremely strong taste. I would not recommend except as a personal challenge.

>>12494283
Cheese is rotted milk

>>12501099
What country are you from? I find that a lot of Americans cannot stand blue cheese and have never noticed a gender difference related to it. But perhaps the sharp taste of it is less palatable to women?

>>12501624
>poland S tier
apart from their outstanding smoked cheeses, poland produces mostly poor imitations of other nation's cheeses. you are a mong.

>>12503416
not all blue cheeses are sharp. some are quite mild as far as the cheese goes, but just with the slight mold flavours.
cambozola for example is a very mild cheese.
in fact, it was cambozola that i first used to change my wife's mind about blue cheese.

Crossboarder here, can I ask for some recommendations ? I'm starting to have enough money to hit the marketplace for cheese occasionally, but I'm always confused what to buy and end up settling on what I know, like
>St. Félicien
>St. Marcelin
>Chaource
>various goat's cheese (rocamadour, chabitou, chèvre)
>Mont D'Or
>Brie
>Comté
>Brillat-Savarin
So typically "crustless" cheese, I guess? And I'm wondering how I'm missing out. I have no idea what any of these are in English though and google isn't helping, sorry.

>>12503321
St. Félicien is fucking great. Have you tried St. Marcellin? It's less flavoursome, kinda softer. Smaller, but also pretty good. Brillat-Savarin is also very light, pretty much breakfast material.

>>12494267
I scan some cheese to share wih people on another board from time to time

>>12494288
>not chausse aux moines

pleb status: filtered

>>12496850
Vegetarians can use rennet?

>tfw always loved cheese
>first I got constipated from eating cheese a couple of years ago
>now I straight out bleed from my ass after having myself a nice camambert

not like this

>>12494722
>Feta
>Epoisses
>Blue Wensleydale
>Mature chedz
>Gouda

Feta and chedz feature in day to day meals, Gouda is mainly for blending with chedz for toasties, and the blue and epoisses are just good eating with some crusty loaf for low-effort lunches.

I'm currently on the lookout for a good local source of coulommiers but my local cheese retailer rarely has it in.

>>12500527
What are you doing here?

>>12501624
Frenchies know cheese, you foot. And putting German, Dutch and Polish cheese above British betrays your utter lack of taste. Just stop.

I had a gorgonzola recently that was unlike any I have tested before. It was extremely strong, overwhelmingly so, and had an acrid taste almost like burnt plastic. Is there something up with it, or is this just some super gorg that is on another level from what I've tried in the past?

>>12506139
yeah, fuck it

>>12494267