/ck/ - Food & Cooking

>>12188027
based

>>12188052
I can't tell if that's toothpaste or melted candy cane, I really hope it's candy cane

>>12188052
kek

bumping your thread.

>>12188103
You're really not smart huh

>>12188471
classic

>>12188467
>obvious plant

>>12188505
Huh?

>>12188467
ok now THAT's really funny :^)

>you know waiting is a job not a career?
Waiting can be a career, but again, you're only thinking of chain restaurants and cheap grub shacks. There's plenty of restaurants in the world where servers make a great annual income with benefits, and I work somewhere like that. We sell bottles of wine from the 90s and early 00s that cost more than a server at Longhorn Steakhouse can make in sales over a few days. I'm not just a server who brings food and says "hun" and walks away never to be seen, but an agent of hospitality. I get to make people's evenings special, I get to go above and beyond to get them whatever they need to have a great night they'll not forget. My primary job is just to hang out with people who are eating and make their evenings great. My secondary job is to harbor an immense knowledge of fine wine and cuisine so I can explain and recommend food and drink for a guest's particular palate.
Making several grand a month to basically host dinner party guests and drink a lot of wine is a pretty great career to me. Stay salty.

>>12188557
Waiters are so insecure lmao

*queue pizza time*

>>12188557

waiter on a gay cruise line serving gallons of semen to faggots like yourself more like it

>>12188572
youre up late abo

>>12188209
Anon this is supposed to be a humor thread, not a delusional vegan butthurt thread.

>>12188559
That's an independent woman right there!

>>12188613
100% guaranteed she has an eating disorder lol

>>12188724
as long as she isn't fat, who cares?

>>12188740
me, she's too skinny

>>12188458
thanks fren

>>12189139
Hes working fast today

>>12188029
This was composed in an ironic fashion, right?

>>12188052
classic

>>12188608
thats some pretty hair

>>12188559
i lost so harde @ this imag

>>12188740
I really don't like you empathy free people.
>who cares about someone's life as long as they make my dick hard
I know the example posted is just from a show, but you have a horroble mindset.

>>12189332
Not the same anon, but really if someone else is busily ruining their lives it's not my job to save their ass unless they ask me to.

>>12188559
Goddamn everything about that women pisses me off.

>>12189385
I dont get it am i brainleter

>>12189467
no ones asking you to save them, but what does it cost you to have some empathy?

it really is a sad thing to see someone fucking up their lives. Some people live pretty tragic and hopeless lives, and for me at least, the fact that you can't do jack shit to help them is the saddest part.

real Gordon Ramsay-style scrambled eggs

>>12189484
2 x 1/4 cup
vs
2 1/4 cup

>>12189385
Let this be a warning to all degenerates who use units of volume for baking. Weight is the only sensible metric for flour.

>>12189488
Back
to
reddit

>>12189488
What if theyre Jews though?

>>12188029
>white people

>>12189385
>9gag
>twitter emoji bullshit

Fucking kill yourself

>>12189298
>>12189299
>>12189319
>>12189322
>>12189348
go to hell jevin you fucking idiot

>>12189593

>>12188505
>>12188509
It's a dude who photoshops a bunch of crap like this and then leaves it in stores after taking a picture. Or supposedly he does.

I imagine he's banned from a few places.

>>12188565

>>12188559
I don’t know who to kill first, the woman or the chef who made that.

>>12189298
>>12189299
>>12189319
these are funny jevin :) cutie

>>12189733
youre not fooling anyone jevin you cocksucker

>>12188027
roofles /fit/ btfo

>>12189499
So which is it? Is it 1/2 cup or 2 and 1/4 cups?

>>12189507
Imperial system is obviously better for baking than metric.

>>12188557
Hey, could you bring me some ketchup?

>>12189488
based kind anon

>>12188592
Nothing delusional about being at optimal health

>>12189734
Please have some understanding, I haven't spoken to a real person in days. I miss my girl so much why did she have to leave me.

>>12189488
Because making myself feel like shit over another persons' misfortune I have no control over is a waste of time and effort. If there was something to be done, I'd be more concerned. There isn't, so I'm not.
Pic unrelated, just trying to get back into the humor thread mindset.

>>12189856
why do you post here like its your blog
nobody cares

>>12188557
That was a good thread

>>12189871
>based /ck/ poster
i wonder what happened to him, he left for his sunday brunch shift and never posted again in that thread.

>>12189852
now thats a great amount of cabbage for a sal.
>t. taternig

>>12189852
Is that oil, or just wet? Learn to make some lemon garlic tahini dressing. No need for worthless oil. Tahini is already way too runny on its own.

>>12189765
Demonstrably false. If baking requires the precision all you guys claim, you want the unit that breaks down to the smallest increments.

>>12188530
fucking kek

>>12189762
half cup

>>12188608
you think just because you took off your glasses we can't tell thats you Michael?

>>12188586
imagine not having gamer thumbs

>>12190090
anon thats the thumb of a mental defective who chews his nails down to nubs

>>12188029
My mom once bought unfrosted strawberry poptarts because she thought they were healthier. Turns out they have more calories than frosted.

>>12189507
Flour has varying moisture content, so scales aren't much better than cups.

>>12189488
Because if I took the time and energy to feel bad about every shitty thing in the world I would never get anything done or be able to live my own life.

>>12190017
Finna go add a pinch of basil and a splash of vinegar to this dish brb

>>12189348
FUCK I remember this shit. Anyone else get the "Hillary Clinton reveals her shocking final form" one?

>>12189762
Guy used a 1/4 cup of flower twice, he needed 21/4 cups of fleur instead

>>12188027
Accurate.
Search dad bods and face being the most important thing in attraction for men.

>>12189488
Based and empathy pilled

>>12188043
What a QT I would bail him out

>>12191536
https://imgur.com/a/RuZG0
Sleepy Pie

>>12190452

>>12190082
and what was he doing?

>>12188816
But the Lord said: "No, lol."

>>12188586
Can you put that thumb on a picture of my cat?

>>12192838
sure pm me

>>12192846
Here you go.

>>12192889
take this, friend.

>>12192942
WTF is that face

>>12192965
what face?

>>12189139

>dat 3rd second

secret ingredient

>>12188586
BASED

>>12189139
>emanelif
nona ,boj doog

>>12189588
It's a joke you mong, the guy asked for a simple tasteful cap so filled it with retarded shit

>>12189488
based

>>12193728
I get the joke now. My apologies.

>>12188559
context?

>>12194213
yeah once there was a dumb bitch who posed with her food to get likes on the 'gram but spilled it all over the place

>>12191765
yeah meth scars mmm so dreamy!

>>12189856
Because you are an utter faggot, now stop namefagging

>>12190003
>No need for worthless oil.
>Tahini
Nigga tahini is like 60% oil by itself, you even have to stir that shit back into the creamy dank stuff before you can use it, what the hell did you think that liquid was? Sesame seed liquid?

>>12189564
I love reddit

>>12194478
It's oil that was already in the seed, not added. I know, because I've ground my own. Same with peanut butter. It becomes pourable on its own when the particles are small enough.

>>12194506
It's still oil, that's exactly how you get peanut oil, the only one that is not really all that good for you is corn oil and that's because it's more an industrial byproduct than an actual food item

>>12194095

>>12194519
That's not the only weird one. Grapeseed oil is extracted with hexane, and so is most canola unless specified otherwise. All of them have negative value nutritionally.

>>12188557
How does one get started to end up in your position?

>>12188103
>>12188444
Is it summer already

>>12189139
The king of /ck/

>>12194642
not him but work at more casual places then slightly more upscale, then go for it. It helps to have knowledge of wine

>>12190192
True but at least you can make adjustments the first few times and then mostly keep it consistent after that.

>>12188209
This isn't a cringe thread

>>12189499
As an americookn't, why wouldn't they just put "1/2 cup"? Is it at all standard to say multiples of 1/4? If so, they should've at least written "2x 1/4 cup", because "2 1/4 cup" means 2.25 cups

>>12190466
Shit, you're right

>>12194765
The recipe says two and a half cups, that poster read is as two quarter cups.

no one laughed at the OP

>>12188209
This is a humor thread, not a rectally ravaged vegan thread.

>>12192914
i love this one

>>12194095

>>12188027
I know a great joke
Vegans

>>12194312
Pahahaha

>>12188471
It's genuinely difficult to tell if this is trolling or not. One one hand, a bored anon may have done this for a laugh. On another hand, some midwester fatass trailer dweller might actually eat this slop.

>>12192965
what face

>>12189856
Because you're a worthless faggot who cries about his relationships on a /ck/ humor thread.

>>12194570
Interesting. What oils are best to buy?

>>12196811
yeah jevin is bad and dumb and gay

I hate this thread

>>12194095
>sea bass not well done
faggotry

>>12188559

She would not deserve a bowl of eggs.

>>12197169
I get how it's practical for office events, but do people do this for personal bagels?

>>12194465

whats the story behind the satanic bakery ? sounds interesting.

>>12197169
why do we even have bagels that large if you can just buy a loaf of bread.

>>12197177
had green curry before, its not for me but I would say that no one will miss it.

>>12197290
Personally, egg bagels (my favorite) have a unique taste and texture that is incredible and addicting that loaves of bread can't replicate. I grew up eating them in the tri-state area, but I'm not sure if the supposedly unique water is a meme especially since I've had them very rarely as an adult living elsewhere. I don't want them sliced in the St. Louis fashion, though. I want, at minimum, the bagel sliced in halves then quarters, not in tiny slices.

>>12197276
Honesty props to whoever put that together

>>12196843
None. You don't need them. Eat whole nuts and seeds. They have nutrients you do need.

>>12194095
>truffle miso
what kind of shit place is this

>>12197491
Ah yes a regular normal Wisconsin #1 cheese. None of that pretentious libtard cheese that smells weird and has mold and stuff (OMG YUCKEEEEEEEEE!)

>>12197276
clever

>>12197534
What horrid chemicals would you even use to make a cookie that's gluten free?

>>12197555
Gluten, apparently.

>>12197555
>What horrid chemicals would you even use to make a cookie that's gluten free?
probably rice/almond/coconut flour held together with fats and xanthan gum

>>12197491
What does American flavor taste like?

>>12197555
THEY TRIED ALRIGHT, ALRIGHT, STOP BOTHERING AND HARASSING MY CHILDRENS ARTWORK

>>12197555
Sorghum flour
Tapioca flour
Soy lecithin
Psyllium
Pea protein
t. Gluten free baker

>>12188557
Please do not hang out with the diners

>>12189488
What's so sad about not beeing fat? And by the way, I didn't eat for 4 days and I'm feeling great. As long as I'm not a fucking fatass

>>12197693
Appropriation and fear.

>>12188029
Pretty reddit.

>>12188467
>jokes begin in the first line
>capslock
>switches to first person
Bad premise, and even bad at being the premise. Made me less happy as a result of having seen it.

>>12189852
Shit, i thought that was a bowl of candy.

>>12188052
very nice

>>12197555
I've baked almond flour cookies and coconut flour cookies. They come out just fine with no chemicals/additives.

>>12188209
based

>>12197169
Do Americans just eat pieces of bread with nothing on it? Is it dry or is American bread different?

Genuinely curious.

>>12194248
Still more attractive than you, fatass

>>12199365
Are you kidding? You got your stereotypes backwards, friend. We load the bagel/bread up with inordinate amounts of cheese, spreads, dips, etc. There was probably a tray just outside the camera frame in that pic with a plethora of spreads and toppings.

>>12197693
freedom

>>12199365
do you not know what a bagel is

heh

>>12188103
your optimism is not well-placed

>>12200345
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h7VlU60JJII

>>12200368
>Ben Garrison
Every fucking time!

>>12188027
I really don't understand /fit/...they are so against using any seasoning or even a tablespoon of butter or cream

>>12188027
>that fat person cope

>>12200608
>cope
Is this the new cuck?
Are retards like you going to demean the phrase by spamming it so much it’s the same as calling someone gay?

>>12188209
Lol imagine being a vegan, the dude who made that comic is definitely 120lbs soaking wet and has a feminine penis.

>>12194095
I fucking hate old people

>>12200616
its the new "seething" which is just the new "incel rage" which is just the new "u mad"

>>12200616
I'm gay btw if that matters

>>12200515
Hee hee fuck roasties!

>>12200810
That's what I'm trying to do

>>12197700
You mean your wife's children?

>>12189769
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N7e01zEcxMU

>>12189139
EXIT?

>>12188027

>>12200368
Arrow pointed right at the black kid

BEEEEEEEEEN

>>12202175
It's shopped

>>12192889
The fuck is this?
>bred to taste
>krummies
Buschs beans only thing there that lets me know you are human

>>12202767
>orange fool

>>12202799
Rent free

>>12200307
Incels vs roasties.jpg

>>12200301
>We see the lasagna wings. There's more Italy than necessary

>>12189348
I miss f list ads

>>12201575
Tuxedo beefed?

>>12204130
think you mean j list

>>12204130
>f list
based furfag

>>12189852
This nigga eating leaves lmao

>>12194095
Can you imagine the amount of shit the rest of the table gave the guy who got his medium well?

>>12189348
https://imgur.com/a/65BPX#tFHhYr5
my waifu actually

>>12200301
>we see the unlimited stick. It is infinite. It is all.
im fucking dying

>>12189488
Based, thank you for existing. We need more empathy and love.

>>12204364

>>12200301
I know these 1000 hour bot posts are total BS but i love them.

>>12197184
I dont see how its the least bit practical for office events

>>12198193
second person

>>12197229
Boomer pr*testants.

>>12191536
Is this a more classy version of lean?

>>12201575
Classic

>>12200369
Any backstory on why Ruse is involved with something like this?

>>12199365
Americans think that butter is fattening so they typically coat bread/bagels with some HFCS-laden peanut butter, jam, nutella, fruit flavored cream cheese, etc

>>12198640

>>12194095
>ordering kobe and wagyu well done

HAAARRRRRRRGHHHHHH

>>12200301
>friend 4 smiles wide, her mouth is full of secret soup

>>12200608
>that fat person cope

That's the correct way to use that template, it's "Ironic". lurk more.

>>12200664
It was pretty obvious.

>>12194095
Now that's properly cooked beef. Based

>>12200345
milf

>>12189488
I think people ruining their lives is hot.

>>12200235
I FUCKING HATE PEOPLE WHO DO THIS

>>12201605
>Wendys CEO

>>12188027
/ck/ gets mad and calls you a fatass if you drink a coke though

>>12197296
Where the fuck do you even find egg bagels any more?

>>12189139
>filename
Cringe job, anon

>>12197497
>Ah yes a regular normal Wisconsin #1 cheese. None of that pretentious libtard cheese that smells weird and has mold and stuff (OMG YUCKEEEEEEEEE!)

>>12197710
bro i need more recipes, how do i make the most inexpensive gluten free bread, what are the cheapest gluten free pastries you make ?

>>12200301

>>12200307
This is good fun.

>>12204130
lifelike texture ;_;

>>12194312

>>12204364
whoever decided to not put a full size photo of her unshooped feet in the cap was a huge asshole

>>12189716
that didn't age well

>>12208321

wow drawing feet is really hard

>>12194095

>>12189332
shut up faggot, shes a qt 3.14

>>12189573

>>12189139
Near Pajeet puts away like 5 of those little custards in the time it takes to cook that

>>12189852
>no skin on cucumbers
#BASED

>>12200301
>Olive Garden. When you're here, you're here.

Sounds about right.

>>12194213
She's spilling it all over the table you blind summerfag

>>12192942
Why?

>>12189871
got an archive link?

>>12200301
>pasta nachos
Isn't that just macaroni?

>>12194095
100% chance this is some mid-western shithole jap place that just calls their shit "kobe/wagyu" but it's not really. Every Japanese place in the mid-west is named Kobe, so they can get around the rules and call it a "Kobe Steak" because it's the namesake of their restaurant. Also the owners are Chinese and the chefs are Mexican. Not a single Jap working there.

>>12209474
>archive this shit
those were the days my friend

>>12205295
Hey you where in that thread too?

>>12208323
i wonder what $65,000 of pizza and hot dogs looks like

>>12200307
that's kinda hot

>>12209916
Don't know what thread you're referring to, so no.

>>12189488
You can be kind without being needlessly occupied with the way other people choose to live their lives. Two things can be true at the same time, but the fact you have this type of binary mindset where you assume everything automatically deserves empathy for you to be a caring individual, is a big red flag about you as a person.

>>12200491
Food is supposed to be your fuel, not a source of pleasure.

>>12194097
Where's the rest of the dick? WHERE'S THE DICK!

>>12210270
You are incorrect

>>12210467
Why is that anon incorrect?

>>12200301
I haven't laughed this hard in a long time, thanks anon.

>>12189299

>>12194095
I always order my steak rare, but well-done kobe-style beef still tastes kinda good actually.
a normal well-done steak is tough and dry to the point of being almost inedible, but beef with a lot of intramuscular fat, like kobe, still retains most of its juiciness.
it's still dumb to eat high quality beef like that, but at least they are not ruining it completely.

>>12191536
What is it with this board and NyQuil

>>12200345
do americans really do this?

>>12200307
why didn't he get a drink?

>>12211162
Having a drink with your meal is super feminine. Before or after. Not during.

>>12206559
the summerfags came early i see

>>12189494
do eurocucks really?

>>12194095
I ordered this

>>12194095
Where's the chili?

>>12200301
>Secret Soup
jesus christ

>>12188467
>reddit

>>12211162
roofies

>>12200368
Kek

>>12188530
Anyone have the follow up thread where that dude's roommate found /ck/

>>12209385
there are no "rules" in the US on who can call their beef Kobe. some shithole near my old apartment claims to have kobe beef steaks, but in truth there are only 9 restaurants in the US that are allowed to serve true kobe beef

>>12209349
what is he doing?

>>12211683
It's a new Fortnite dance

>>12211691
is that fortnitedance?
i dont hang around young folks
thansk for tellin me

>>12200301
this made me laugh so much my cat is now worried

>>12211702
Kid in the webm was probably buying tide pods. Good thing he couldn't figure out the scanning machine

>>12211678
I think it's the same situation with wagyu. The real wagyu isn't something that you can easily export since not only is it expensive, the cow is rather limited in supply too, and yet somehow just about any seemingly higher end restaurant manage to stock wagyu.

>>12189139
>black bars
you're a disgrace to the webm community.

>>12197296
you knos you can just use egg bagel dough to make a loaf of bread

This thread. That’s it, that’s the joke.