/ck/ - Food & Cooking

>>11775745
Requesting: Surly king of the eggfort.webm

>>11775746
Huh?

>>11775746
FUCKING BASED AND FUCKING REDPILLED

>>11775745
based and chinkpilled

>>11775745
>Inb4 eggfort cancer

yarr

>>11775761
i was hungry but after watching this shit not anymore
thanks senpai

>>11775746
filename is correct BTW.

>>11775779
WHY?!?

>>11775770
Christ

>>11775779
>Not naming it prolapse.webm

You had one job.

>>11775829
>can't use a knife for shit
>cuts off the root of the onion
>sliced mozzarella? Does that even exist?
>not using dry hand/wet hand method for breading

Is it a satire video?

>>11775770
Couldn't even apply two brain cells worth of creativity and called it pizza pie.
I hate that the retards making these videos probably make more money than I ever will.

>>11775770
Nuke this shithole called New York.

>>11776307
Tried this and it was way too fucking hot. Too much chilli powder. Also who puts sugar in curry

>>11775751
Imagine working as a pasta cutter. What a painful existence

>>11776490
thats so morbid
fuck asians man

>>11775790
How does he egg out?

>>11775745
I wish that was me

>>11776501
Yeah, why isn't that automated?

>>11776545
dey took er jobs

>>11776510
It's just reflexes, the head has been chopped of.

>>11776490
put it out of it's mysery already

>>11776510
I don't get what's wrong with this?

>>11776563
I'm aware the head is missing but it's so disgustingly barbaric

>>11776574
Well, you could clamp it down I guess. But it's literally dead, so nothing barbaric about it. It's probably just western pussyfication that this seems cruel to many people.

>complains about the same webms being posted in old threads
>webm threads aren't we interesting as they used to be
Jack webms can stay gone for all I care but c'mon, some of the webms like that old Japanese man grabbing a live fish and cooking it into a dish from a movie was one of my favorites. Now it's just the obligatory egg fort webm or some random bitch doing something retarded.

>>11776574
have you ever seen a poultry farm anon?

go visit one and then tell me that THIS is barbaric

>>11776501
I was once a pancake packer.
Just for two days though. Pay was pretty decent but goddamn. My back and brain couldn't handle that kind of work.

>>11775761

>>11775770

>posting the obvious PR food shit

Y'know those places don't even do it? They legit do it for likes on social media.

>>11776786
I haven't. At this rate I'm pretty sure I'll become a vegeterian soon

>>11776780
Your pissing in the wind anon. These threads are exactly the same every single time. Maybe 1 or 2 new videos get posted a month. If you don't want to circlejerk jerk about the egg faggot and ja/ck/ then get out there and make some new webms.

>>11776304
>sliced mozzarella? Does that even exist?
Yes, it's very common. Where the fuck do you live?

>>11776853
Denmark.
I only ever see the shitty shredded stuff the put on pizzas and ballshaped mozz in brine.
But I don't exactly go looking for it in dry slices.

>>11776490
This is fucking horrible. Fucking Asians I swear to god. Vegans give me shit for hunting but I shoot to kill and always make sure I kill them with one bullet to the brain. I don't fucking skin them and cook them alive. I get a clean shot and harvest all of their meat and sell what I don't use to people I know who use bones, intestines, etc. for food or medicine. While most fish can't feel pain, eels can. And that is so fucking hard to watch.

>>11777033
>and always make sure I kill them with one bullet to the brain
skeptical.jpg

this suggests your post is full of shit. Most hunters don't aim for the brain because it is a very small target. The heart/lung area is much larger and thus is the preferred target. You might want to keep that in mind for your future LARPing.

>>11776564
There's no head.

>>11777033
The eel is dead, also hunters don't generally aim for the head, as there's a high chance of missing the brain and accidentally blasting an animal's lower jaw off and leaving it to starve to death.

>>11775790
How does he get out without breaking the eggs?

>>11777033
I have a hard time believing you hunt if you shoot for the brain. Ever hunter worth a shit knows that you shoot for the heart.

>>11776821
I don't know how to make webms, bro

>>11775770
Chicago style pizza is gross

>>11775745
>ASIAN CUISINE

>>11775779
>pinksock.webm

>>11775751
surely a machine on a time could do this

>>11776299
>not naming it prolapsed Angus

get on my level

>>11778091
looks like a meal for an ironic hipster with sleeve tats on his cheat day

>>11775770
Who woulda thought that GTA would predict the pizza cake

>>11776497
>Also who puts sugar in curry

People who don't like their shit making people wince in pain

>>11778091
git gud scrub

>>11776526
>>11777218
Beneath him, there's a platform that lowers and raises at certain times of the day

The King never leaves

why do you think he's so surly?

>>11778360
>Deep fried egg whites

That's like deep frying butter

>>11778363
>That's like deep frying butter
Do you have a problem with that?

>>11778350

>>11778096
This way you can slap "hand made" on the package and charge twice as much.

>>11778369
i like my eggs like i like my women dry and lifeless

>>11778369
why even add a sliver of spinach.the entire roll doesn't even have a full servings worth

>>11776497
Probably kashmiri chili which is not hot

>>11778423
Green is important, it makes food look healthy

>>11775837

>>11775770

Mama Mia

>>11775745
When I see the live octopuses eating videos I just want to run into the scene and scoop them up in a fish bowl and let them free!

>>11776501
That won't be the only thing that person does all day. People doing repetitive tasks like this usually rotate roles with people doing other repetitive tasks to prevent strain.

>>11778464
the plural of octopus is octopi

>>11778492
>octopussi

>>11778492
This is fake news

>>11778492
Nope. There's Octopuses, Octopi, and Octopods, all are acceptable. But all have different meaning believe it or not. Just fish, and fishes.

>>11778522
yep. you're an idiot.

>>11775790

>>11778539
go be braindead somewhere else please

>>11778560
no. u.

>>11778121
Fried chicken gets them every time

>>11778557
how does he get out without breaking the nanners?

>>11778557
How does he get out without slipping on all the peels?

>>11778057
Is this how pierce brosnan bond burgered his wife?

>>11776869
Don't worry, Hagen. I've never seen or heard of sliced Mozzarella as well. This surely does only exist in countries whose food culture consists of mere abominations – USA and the Common Wealth. Mozzarella has to look like pic rel, otherwise you can smear your ass with it and, by the honor of your ancestors, don't call it Mozzarella.

>>11778096
They just removed the pasta cutting machina so the guy could illustrate the process better having his head next to the spruiter while not being in danger of dying.

>>11778360
what does TBSP stand for? turbo super pounds?

>>11778655
tablespoon

>>11778576
>>11778599
He takes a banana and splits

>>11778658

>>11778664
nerd

>>11778057
Jesus

>>11775770
>dude pizza lmao

>>11778497

dont know if want...

>>11776526
>implying he ever leaves his throne

>>11775761
I would go there, but only if the place was right next to me.

Doesn't seem special enough to be worth a drive.

>>11776545
why needlessly complicate the machinery when you can just ship the thing with a 2 dollar scraping tool?

>>11775761
Its like a worse calzone.

>>11778340
Cute, like a better ziti pie or Manicotti remix

>>11775790
>filename
fuck off bitch ass anon of the webm thread

>>11778443
Aren't the herbs going to burn before the steak sears?

>>11776490
>Japanese were actually more brutal than the Nazis in WW2 that a German Ambassador with a swastika armband felt sorry for the Chinese being massacred and intervened Schindler-style
>The Chinese built him a statue to honor him
Asians are pretty fucking weird desu

>>11775779
Angus prolapse

>>11776490
Btw it's already dead, well has this funky thing where if you take off it's head it sorta does the "headless chicken" trip

>>11776490
Fucking hell... chinamin are seriously fucked in the head. Barbaric.

>>11778883
Everything I have known is a LIE

>>11778927

>>11775745
What's stopping her from actually picking it up? Is it an electric octopus?

>>11778399
how much would it cost to purchase guacamole made in this fashion? asking for a friend

>>11778121
I'm not usually one for fried chicken jokes but thanks for the laff

>>11778350
Mac and cheese on a burger is actually pretty good.

>>11777033
this guy doesn't hunt

>>11778973
From what is this? Requesting sauce

>>11778606
i hope your comment recieves the appreciation it deserves

>>11775745
Like all you have to do to make this scenario easy is to fucking kill the thing first.
How hard is this for asians?

>>11776304
What the fuck do you do with the root of the onion? Its easier to just throw it out.

>>11775761
>Make a perfectly fine pizza that can hold its own as a pizza
>roll it up and destroy the purpose of making a pizza
Why?
Just make a calzone or something fuck

>>11779853
You can plant it and get a new onion in a month.

>>11779865
That's if you even have a lawn, proper conditions to grow an onion, ability and willingness to bother with gardening them when you can just buy them at the store for cents, so on. Not to mention,you could probably already have some growing already.

>>11775779
I am very curious what they did with this.

>>11778859
The flavors will burn into the steak.

>>11776490
If >>11778923 is true, its not brutal. I can see that being the case.
I'm really getting sick of people jumping to conclusions. Ducks and swans deliberately go to the farmer to be "forcefed" for foi gras

>>11779897
Or maybe you should learn to have empathy.

>>11779899
>empathy
What the fuck are you on about?
Its dead. Its just remnant electricity running through the body. This is not an uncommon thing when slaughtering some animals.
Or are you a vegan/vegetarian type?
Because you're putting me on a pretty high bar for comparison.
You can feel empathy for and acknowledge the death of a non-human animal at the same time. Least, I can. But more than that, lets be clear about my priorities:
My children>My family > My friends >my community >my city > region/state > nation > humanity as a whole > myself

And then below all that, non-human animals are only incidentally relevant for the sake of protecting the balance of nature and for the occasion of making myself feel better to help them (which is related to that balance) when I don't feel like eating or experimenting on them.
They do not fall inside my realm of default morality.

>>11779931
Actually 'myself' exists both at the beginning and end of my priorities depending.

>>11777033
even if that were somehow true, you are a crybaby homo. the only animals ive shot in the head were close up, otherwise that would be retarded.

>>11778871
>he was a nazi with a swastika armband!
>the imperial army was SOMEHOW even more brutal than nahzees! how could that be possible? wow!
its almost like literally anyone in the war would much rather be captured by Germans than the Japanese hmmm really makes you think.

>>11776490
What animal is this? Some sort of eel?

>>11775770
>two words

>>11778057
A lot of the time with these threads I see some gross food bullshit and think "I'd probably still try it." Like that italian sandwich with like 8 different meats and a bunch of mashed up french fries and cheese.

This, though, is a bridge even I wouldn't cross.

>>11778350
This would be good if they didnt put so much damn mac and cheese on it.

>>11778369
gross

>>11778436
fuck this

>>11778497
This looks pretty good

>>11778746
Is that shit?

>>11779899
fuck off

>>11775779
the worst type of beef curtains

>>11775779
It's like that episode of CatDog when they turn inside out.

>>11775745

>>11780189
Isn't this illegal?

>>11775745
octipi are extremely intelligent, its cruel to eat them. I'd rather eat dog than octopus

>>11780199
you're right, those "people" would never stray from the rule of law

>>11780212
Coons really are a savage race

>>11776853

Normal people don't call that dry abomination Mozzarella.
If it isn't a "fresh", moist white cheese it isn't Mozzarella.

>>11778522
Wrong. Octopuses is most correct. Octopodes is technically not incorrect but it's antiquated. "Octopi" is absolutely wrong.

>>11778497
This is literally the worst food webm I have seen in my time browsin /ck/ worse than any Jack webm. Fucking disgusting and putrid. What a waste of good kimchi, eugh the flavors would clash so much

>>11777211
>>11777045
>>11777242
>>11779670
not that fag, but if you're hunting mammals sure heart and lung whatever, but most waterfowl and brush bird nerds try to get pellets into the head either to kill or at the very least stun in the case of sea ducks(skulls are neigh impenetrable)

>>11779865
How're you going to plant it without cutting it off, numbnuts?

>>11780352
this is true for turkeys as well, but you don't use bullets for birds really just shot pellet

>>11776497
Sugar in cooking is a common ingredient.
Many many southern western and northern indian curry recipes call for a bit of sugar. It's commonplace.

>>11776804
>vegetarian
So you will still let baby cows get beat up at birth to get milk and allow chickens to live in cages?

>>11778765
Kevin Malone at the end lmao

>>11778883
That was cool

>>11780144
no, that's a person of color

>>11776490
Better get all those endorphines running so it tastes like shit. Bet my neck-shot venison tastes better than any shit-tier meats these gooks can make

>>11778436
Hello, schlomo

>>11775779
when she says she's ready to settle down

>>11776497
>Tried this and it was way too fucking hot
That is entirely on you, you stupid fuck.
Are you so lousy at cooking that you can't look at a recipe and think "That's too much chili for me, so I'll use less"?

>>11776490
Looks like the remains of an eel exhibiting residual muscle spams, kind of like an amputated tentacle at a sushi joint that reacts to spicy sauce.

>>11780189
Around blacks dont relax

>>11778899
bluepilled, but checked.

>>11780189
I'm curious what giant turtle tastes like. Apparently it's so delicious it took decades to even get a live specimen back to England because the sailors couldn't resist eating them.

>>11778899
>mixes the contents of his spice rack with whatever he pulled off the shelf
>500 dorrar gaijin, you pay!

>>11778883
What kind of garbage beer was that

>>11779977
do you think that the japs were on imperial side anon? oh boy.

>>11779938
as long you dont actively try to make other people miserable thats pretty based to me.

>>11779781
its the borat guy, look him up. he makes awesome sketches, he basically makes high production-value """pranks"""

>>11776821
thats why i only go to every 5th webm thread or so. I wont miss anything, if something interesting gets posted it just becomes a part of the rotation

>>11779609
i can make some for you anon for free :3

>>11778399
I would rather starve then eat this fucking bullshit.

>>11775751
"Hand made" noodles

>>11780189
Looks good.

>>11778606
i dont understand

>>11779781
China. Beyond fucked shit like this happens there daily.

>>11780199
>>11780212
>>11780221
i don't know where this takes place but in some countries and places there are certain laws where there is an exception for some tribes, villages or whatever to hunt them. it's part of their culture or yadda yadda.

>>11775745
What disturbs me about this is that she finds it yucky/scary and yet her natural instinct is to see it as food.

>>11778057
A little butter on the bun before toasting it sounds lovely.
But that's not what I'm seeing here.

>>11779897
>getting sick of people accusing Chinamen of having cruel and barbaric food practices

>>11777218
He doesn' t.

He' s only allowed to go outside once all eggs have been sold/used.

>>11780208
If they ever rise up and try to take out humans it'll be the Asians first.

>>11778369
>breakfast roll
>one roll has 3000 calories

why?

>>11778883
I would love to see more of these.

>>11779781
Sacha Baron Cohen's new show, "Who Is America". Low-brow but really funny, mostly political satire where he tries to get "serious" people to play along with elaborate guises.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CDULmIOqwA8
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mK2DGkyhY2A

>>11778746
No paneer, doesn't cool the sammy. What a disgrace you would think a white person made this, nope just a motherless pajeet

>>11778606

The oldest of oldfags, everyone

>>11778973
Who is America?

>>11776473
Tom Hanks, how low have you sunk...

>>11778340
bleh

>>11775790
you have to cook all the eggs

>>11778576
nanners don't break that easily.

>>11775790

>>11778436
daily reminder

>>11780629
You're thinking of giant tortoises. Turtles are supposed to be pretty good as well though.

>>11777033
Either your hunting skills and knowledge are absolute crap or you are just a lying faggot.

>>11778883
That beer was flat as fuck. Did they open it a week before pouring?

>>11775745
I bet she swallows

>>11782002
Why the fuck would you dry them off before adding the cinnamon? It just makes it harder for the cinnamon to stick.

>>11778340
>fatwomanmakescheese+morecheese.jpg

>>11778057
I can see a little bit of butter, i've had that before and it's pretty good. But this is like 50 times more butter than that what the fuck

>>11780611
you must go outside a lot

>>11780189
:(

>>11776307
imagon the poo

>>11780798
You know that video is just a skit, right? Fucking idiot.

>>11778973
sacha baron cohen actually had gordon ramsay make the food

>>11775770
>make a pie
>call it pizza

>>11782489
>hot indian heroine spics
????

salt bae suicided by jumping off building
https://i.4cdn.org/gif/1547943116292.webm
probably nsfw

goodnight salt prince

F

>>11778436
Hes got the black neighborhood "this house has been flipped" tile backsplash

>>11783468
for the record

>>11778661
Knock it off,Carlos.

>>11782085
What is she making? Is it just mud or is it something?

>>11778360
The only way you could get me to eat boiled egg whites honestly. Call me childish but their taste and texture are still disgusting to me.

>>11783969
You are childish.

>>11783954
Yes,it's mud.
They are desperate in Haiti.

>>11775745

>>11775779
>not naming it makeshift fleshlight

>>11783954
Literally mud and sugar.

>>11778902
I came from seven hours in the future to tell you that that was fucking funny.

Dunno why but on the new webm I made it keeps saying I have an embedded file.

>>11778606
This comment wins over 9000 internets.

>>11784894
Why tho

>>11778436
I just watched the video and it's much worse with sound
>unironically says "wa-la" multiple times
>the name he picked for himself is "awkward puppets"
>Using his normal speaking voice with barely even a change in the cadence of his voice
White American self loathing is truly pathetic.

>nobody has posted Ja/ck/ yet
Come the fuck on, guys

>>11783995
>smoke for a bout

>>11782044
What is this from?

>>11785255
ur mom lol

>>11785252
This is peak something but I'm not exactly sure what something

>>11785258
o :( I thought she didnt like anime

>>11785255
I found it for you.
Turns out one of the girls is a boy.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sXxXRvcrYN0

>>11785252
>>11785259
It's peak fucking disgusting vomit material.

>>11775770
>9 inches tall
>the same height as like 4 fingers
huh, guess my dick is 8 inches now

>>11785279
>one of the girls
Wait, you didn't seriously think the ginger was a girl, did you?

>>11780601
Best reply so far kek

so tasty is paid for by the diary industry right?

>>11779865
My garden soil has been contaminated with arsenic.
I've been told by the relevant authorities not to grow food in my garden. I'll be dead before the soil rejuvenates.

>>11778091
I swear these videos must be some sort of CIA psy op

>>11778899
probably pretty tasty, but i wouldnt pay much more than a couple buck for that

>>11780572
>got'em

>>11779000
>electripuss
New Pokémon idea

>>11783954
Literally it’s mud cookies. People eat that stuff

>>11785253
This is Jack isn’t it? Jesus Christ

>>11778436
>anglo (((people))) food

>>11775745

>>11785963
The exact same shit sauce sqirted on all the meat really triggers me

>>11778436
As if niggers arent eating pb and is on government bread and spending ebt on frozen pizza?

(EBT auto corrected to debt. Kek)

>>11778436
Based and wh*tepilled

>>11778606
he is a very lucky man to have such a high level fetish. Every wife is doomed to be fat so he is guaranteed to have happy sex for the rest of his life.

>>11785855
Don't be poor.

>>11778399
What the fuck is this shit? I thought nothing would top the butter burger in pure disgustingness.

>>11778091

>>11776853
Italy. Not even kidding.

>>11784894
Who the fuck doesn't have a fucking oven or a stovetop to cook salmon, steak, or cookies?

>>11776307
They're all interns who will settle for just a shitty-a-job as you. Cheer up, anon

>>11778497
We need to deal with Americans. What an absolute disgrace. Hearing any proposals.

>>11778057
At least she's using real butter and not that margarine crap. The worst part about this is probably the bun.

And also the fact that those people don't need the calories.

>>11786579
This anon is passionate about cheese.

>>11777033
It's dead you soft little bitch

>>11780136
>>11782085
>>11786095
Whites are so sensitive.

>>11778436

That's a good one. Check out my "black people food" webm.

>pic related

>>11780778
>noodles

>>11778497
>kimchi
>see the bowl of cheese

>>11778497
>putting the cheese in the pot
>on the burner
>by itself

>>11785963
blew my load at 0:26

>>11778606
The memories

>>11778557
banana commanda

>>11778091
"No!"

>>11778899
What a pretentious cunt

>>11783995
Why not just buy ground pork?

>>11776473
No Whopper has ever looked that good.

>>11778557
How does he get out without breaking all the bananas?

>>11786620
niggas in hotels

>>11776473
He'd need to do 10,000 carts these days to afford airport food

>>11778899
>>11780660
>>11785855
>>11788049
I've been, it was $8

>>11781871
It's from a movie called terminal. It's pretty okay.

>>11776473
>put money down
>immediately given burger no questions asked
thanks burger king

>>11775761
The way that stupid twat shakes her head at the beginning makes me want to punch her and I don't know why.

>>11778436

Wipipo and they *spins wheel* drinking water

>>11778057
I live 30 minutes from this place. I really want to go and order the most calorie dense item and experience the pinnacle of flyover cuisine.

>>11788706
No joke. I was a school chaperone for an out of country trip and when I was feeding the kids at a restaurant while we had a layover it was not cheap. The food was okay, but they were charging top restaurant prices. I didn't pay for it though at least I was given money.

>>11775761
Why do Americans do this?

>>11782077
excellent mash of memes, 8/10

>>11778606
>bond burgered
>not silently pounded

>>11779886
Fucked it

>>11778057
And they say Americans have no culture

>>11785243
Is it weird that this is the one Jack webm where I wouldn't mind eating the food?

>>11778746
thanks for reminding me of your doast is reddi

>>11786825
N

>>11786825
nigger

>>11777033
>most fish can't feel pain

>>11778340
>(((kosher salt)))

>>11778399
>white can't co-

>>11789763
youd like his hands all over your food, ew. standards that low m8..?

>>11775790
How surly are his eggs-its?

>>11785243
>>11785246
>>11785253
There's something that's been bothering me for a while now. Is Ja/ck satire? Like this isn't a real person making real instructional videos for real meals is it?

>>11785230
He's saying wa-la ironically, actually.

>>11779000
Octopi have these things called suckers

>>11790143
He fancies himself the everyman. His aim is to get away with being more likable than informative. Maybe people really do see him that way. I don't know. I just find him repugnant.

>>11778436

>>11778606
The code has finally been cracked.

>>11790185

>>11776490
Kinda looks like muscle spasm of already dead eel to me, though the way it's looking and moving is still really off-putting regardless.

>>11775790
I stop scrolling after i finish watching this as i realize nothing can compete with Egg King.

>>11780995
https://youtu.be/eemkTcS0zsM

>>11790055
It's more accurate to say they don't perceive and understand pain in the same way we do.

>>11790214
kek

>>11785963
>that'll be $148 + tip

>>11788780
that's not bad for 8 dollars imo
It can't be in tokyo can it?

>>11790882
I live in Tokyo but I've never been there. A quick search online says that a drink runs about 20-25 dollars there. I might go just to see how it is.

>>11780263
You're close.

If we were to employ the standard English pluralization onto the word octopus, then octopuses would be considered correct. So you're right there.

That being said octopus is a Greek loanword and the correct pluralization of it would be octopodes (pronounced ock-top-o-dees). It's not an antiquated pluralization by any means, just the pluralization if you consider the origin of the language we borrowed the name octopus from.

You are dead on that octopi is the most incorrect on a grammatical level but does that really matter? I forget the specifics (and don't feel like looking it up), but some Englishmen with a hard-on for the Latin language decided that the English language should use Latin pluralization for all of its words. And then ignoring the source language of the loanword, they tacked an "i" on the end and made the plural octopi, and it caught on big, to the point that it is taught like that in school.

So yeah octopi is the most wrong on a grammatical level, because we are using a Latin pluralization for a Greek word, but does that actually matter? Language is much more organic than that. As much as I love to be a pedant about things like this (and clearly I do), it's also important to note that the correct use of or pluralization of a word is the one that everyone uses, not the one that is the technically correct. That's why the OED added the figurative definition of the word "literally" to the dictionary. It is not our job to police and control how language works like those English dumbasses who made the pluralization octopi, but since it did catch on, we need to recognize that on a cultural level it has become the correct pluralization.

The correct pluralization is the one in which I say it, and everybody knows what I'm talking about. The one which conveys the information in the clearest way. And unfortunately for grammarians everywhere, that is octopi.

>yes I am aware that I am a gay autist.

>>11791098
>the correct thing is the popular thing, not the correct thing

>>11791247
That be how language do, anonskous.

>>11778436

>>11778746
indian sandwich.webm

>>11780189
poor fella

>>11789835
I

>>11785930
filename

>>11790467

>>11791247
Go read 1984 and discover that you are actually on big brothers side or something.

>>11790214
he's a big guy

>>11778871
i dont see how its hard to be more brutal that the side that were objectively good and didnt do anything bad

>>11784855
>sugar
hahahahahahaha
no