/ck/ - Food & Cooking

>>11128238
I ate food from outside my own ethnic group (wh*toid).
Forgive me, father.

>>11128238
i make $200k+/year and buy bologna for sandwiches because it's cheaper than turkey or ham, which is prefer

>>11128257
i thought we had rights to everything. you did nothing wrong.

>>11128238
i use MSG in most of my recipies and people always wonder why the food tastes so good

>>11128263
No brother, for it is written:

>Oh ye who partake from plate of far-sea-soil
>Shall forever be cast OUT as blasphemer among the oppressed
>Appropriation of one spoonful shalt be repay'd in kind with one lash of the knot to the back
>Expression of delight at ye perversion of masterrace foreign foods shalt be met with 10 lashes of the knot
>All ye who try to recreate this most Holy of minority culture foods shalt be executed on't spot by means of Ja/ck/ force feeding the offender undercooked chicken.
>As it was written in my mom's recipe book.
>Shitlord

I made a sandwich with these using wheat bread and sweet pickles.

I fucking love tacos made with ground beef and those cheapo seasoning packets.

>>11128289
i'm sorry you are in a cult. white people own everything and kick the christ out of any that dispute it.

>>11128238
I eat and like instant ramen

>>11128238
I sometimes forget to taste test my food before serving it to chef.
Also forget and use the same test spoon twice every now and then, and serve it anyway.

everytime i'm alone in my house and don't have any leftovers i just eat frozen pizzas

>>11128266
same.

>>11128238
I never write down my recipes or take notes, even though I bought a journal to do just that.

Not culinary but when I started my lube tech job a year ago in the third week there I started someone's car after draining all the oil out if it because I thought I had put my oil in it already. Was only for a few seconds until I realized but fuck I probably shaved like 40k miles off the life of that engine. It was a brand new grand Cherokee.

>>11128446
most likely did not harm it at all.

>>11128291
I thought those were the mouths of lampreys at first.

>>11128238
I put peanuts in my coke and eat the creamline in milk bottles.

I like instant mashed potatoes more than anyone's homemade from scratch mersh'd 'derders.

>>11128446
Fucking lube techs are why I do my own work. You have to have a system that is repeatable for every car. That way if you deviate you know something is off. I always placed the cap on a bright red shop rag so I know I hadn't put oil in.

I eat Worcestershire sauce straight out of the bottle

I confessed it to my friends while I was rolling

>>11128238
I ate an entire bag of jalapeno popper cheese curls, all dipped in ranch in one sitting.

>>11128238
>decide to make a pack of instant ramen
>i'm completely fucking wasted
>fell asleep while it was boiling away
>fire alarm goes off and mine for some reason is absurdly loud
>bolt upright looking like someone shot 4k volts through an anemic fucking Dracula after a thousand year sleep
>kitchen full of smoke
>in a confused daze waft it out the window
>realised my pan was forever destroyed
>landlord turns up even though it's like fucking 1am
>other residents in my flat thought the building was on fire and phoned them
>the whole flat stank of intense burning for the next 3/4 days
>the knob thing on the cooker for that particular ring melted or something and wont go back on after it fell off
>6 months later do the exact same thing (though luckily not as badly)
>be writing this right now
>working way through two bottles of wine and a beer
>about to do cleaning
>plan to drunk cook a homemade pizza afterwards
Wish me luck anons.

I top my steaks with baked apples and cinnamon.

>>11128658
why are you like this

>>11128238
I confessed in another thread but will confess here as well. I like to make ranch dressing from the packet ( with mayo and milk) really thin and drink like 1/2 cup at a time as a meal. No, I'm not obese just 30 pounds overweight/ fat. I hate myself for it but idk what it is. I just want to drink it. It's disgusting but yet delicious. I don't do it a lot but when it's around it's really bad.

>>11128605
Do you also "eat" water?

>>11128956
>1/2 cup at a time as a meal.
Thats not a "meal" though.

>>11128962
It is when you consider calories. It's mayo and milk. I love the stuff real thin. I don't buy the packet a lot because I will go through 2 cups of ranch in 2 days max. It's disgusting actually but Jesus it's so damn good!! Fuck!

>>11128957
Lol. No I just sip that throughout the day to cleanse my palette

>>11128266
Does it make a significant difference in taste or flavor ? Srs question.

i always mix generic brand bran flakes into my sugary cereal so I don't die from malnutrition and have regular poops

>>11129650
desu that's a decent idea. Does it affect the flavor much?

>>11128658
Get your act together and stop drinking. Also, people should never cook or do anything that can have important consequences while intoxicated; it can always wait.

>>11128538
These are century eggs. Smells like sulfur and death but the taste is good for me, especially with pickled stuff.

>>11128238
I microwave things to cook them most of the time

>>11128658
I've done this with frozen hash browns.

Twice.

The oil scraped clean off the pan with much effort though.

I used a piece of bread for a hotdog bun because I forgot I had hotdog buns

I put the screw in the Tuna

I eat that fake seafood crab almost every other week. It's so good.

>>11128329
This isn't too bad. If you were making "real tacos" you'd basically be making a good version of whats in those seasoning packets with more real ingredients and nutrients, but its not like it's not tacos.

I needs it.

I hate the taste of beer
I have to put a timer on or else I'll forget about the thing I'm making
I use one of those tassimo machines to make coffee
I don't grind my own pepper
very occasionally I will dip chocolate cookies in salted butter

I've bought the Taco Bell branded shells, meat seasoning, and hot sauces to make a nice dinner at home for me and the wife. We couldn't think of a suitable side dish, so I revved up the mini deep fryer and made bloomin onions for the two of us.

>>11128658
Get an electric kettle you reckless piece of shit. You won't be drinking wine in jail after you kill a bunch of sleeping children.
>>11129996
The sin is not doing it yourself with quality ingredients.
>>11130037
You're a lost cause.

>>11129979
Gotta watch that show again...

>>11129118
it does. its kinda like adding salt but the taste (usually meat) is more complere and has an extra kick to it
order it online and experiment. a little goes a long way with MSG

I made pasta with fish and put cheese on top

>>11128266
How do you go about using it, like when and how do you apply it? Is it like salt in the sense that you just sprinkle a little bit in the food or what?

I crush my instant noodles

I buy cheddarwurst. Such a convenient snack that takes 20 seconds to make.

>>11128238

Meat and veggies are cut on the same fucking cutting board and the same knife

....fuck you you fucking immune-systemlets who constantly bitch about how you need two seperate cutting boards and knifes if using meat

Did tyrone rape you in the fucking ass you liberal cuck nigger lover and give you AIDS, is that why your immune system is so low? Fuck all of you soyboycucks

>>11128238
I eat ramen dry, and sprinkle the spice mix, and sometimes the oil over it for flavor, I do this more often than I actually cook them.

I like cold tomato beans

I like to watch cooking shows, read /ck/ and such, but I mostly eat microwave crap and frozen pizzas, the only thing I really make is spaghetti bolognese, steak (with oven fried frozen chips, and prefabricated Bearnaise sauce), pancakes, and burgers.

If it's in the middle of the night and I have nothing else, I'll make cook some spaghetti and eat it with loads of butter, chili flakes and garlic powder.

Forgive me padre.

>>11131421
Also, when I make pancakes, I just buy a dry mix that you add water to, because I'm a piece of shit.

>>11128238
I will occasionally put a block of cheese on a slice of bread and microwave it for the laziest "grilled cheese" ever.

>>11128238
I worked at a local Restaurant for a week and I put the fries in a Pan

I wanted pasta really bad, but didn't have tomato sauce, so I chopped some garlic and used ketchup instead. Never again.

>>11131407
There's nothing wrong with this at home, it's an industry standard that some people get persnickety about when applied outside of a professional kitchen.

No need for rude language, friend

I leave my dirty pots and pans in the sink because my roomates OCD forbids him to just leave it there and his meek personality prevents him from confronting me about it.

>>11131528
I'm glad I live alone, passive aggressive shit like this drives up the fucking wall.

>>11131498
It's a stupid rule in a professional kitchen as well

>oh no, can't get chicken juice on a vegetable that's going to be brought to 200+ degrees

fucking cooklets

>>11128238
I put chorizo in paella and no one can convince me to do otherwise.

>>11131673
How about if I'm from the health inspector and I'm going to close your place down when I find that the vegetarian food is cross contaminated with meat products?

Ketchup on eggs

>>11128238
i fucking love those prepackaged club sandwiches they sell at the store. literally can't get enough of them if they weren't so expensive for what they are, i'd be eating them non stop

>>11128658
one night i was out of money and snacks, but still had booze and i wanted to make more snacks to pair with my alcohol. but i did have some flour and seasonings at home. of all the things i could have done, i decided making fucking taralli which require you to make dough, roll out a couple of dozen pieces, form them into rings, boil them, lay them on a cloth, wait for them to dry and then bake them in the oven until crispy

i still can't believe how i managed to do that whole thing as wasted as i was. since then i only cook stuff in the skillet that requires me to be constantly watching over it, so there's no chance i forget about it or fall asleep

>>11131108
exactly like salt but in smaller quantities. if i make burger patties i'll just use a small pinch of MSG on a single patty before grilling. you can also use it with diary dressings or even in bechamel.

>>11128266
note that msg will make tasty food better, shitty food will remain shitty after adding msg

>>11131778
your sins are forgiven

>>11131928
Untrue, that stuff can make mud taste amazing.

>>11128956
>No, I'm not obese just 30 pounds overweight/ fat.

>>11131944

good luck

I put applesauce on my rice.
Whenever I use it I take one scoop for my plate and eat 3 more cause I love that shit so much.

>>11129683
>never cook while drunk
lmao how tf u suppose to eat, nigga?

>>11131977
Nice dubs.
Come back when you can actually speak English you ignorant coon.

>>11131425
use milk instead of water and you're fine

>>11131984
It really just baffles me how you don't cook while drinking. I regularly down half a bottle of vodka and make dinner. I'm just not retarded

>>11128728
Why steak and not pork?

>>11131421
>I eat mostly microwave crap and frozen foods
Do you at least fix them with other spices and stuff? Adding real cheese, garlic/onion powder, and some dill to bagel bites makes em pretty tasty.

>>11128266
this is not a sin. The stimga against MSG is wholly on the basis of racism due to influx of Chinese immigrants and subsequent restaurants.

>>11132004
>it really just baffles me that your liver isn't fucked to high heaven and you won't die a painful, expensive, miserable death from cirrhosis/cancer shitting in a pan and being a drain on society
this is why al/ck/ should be banned

>>11132086
>drink once a month
>UR GONNA DIE ALCKIE STOP POSTING NEVER POST HERE AGAIN
please stop embarrassing yourself

>>11132100
>I make dinner once a month and that's what I call regular
so you're a liar as well as a drunk degenerate. typical al/ck/ constantly backpedaling/scrambling to justify bad habits due to your grey matter decay.

>>11132102
I eat out maybe once a month. Stop with your incessant tirade against alcohol you DARE fuck. Drink some more kool-aid but make sure it's non-alcoholic you might wither away and die after a single drop.

>>11132102
also
>hurr binge drinking is better than drinking every day even though it means my liver can't acclimatize to the alcohol barrage and I suffer even more in the long run!!

>>11132113
>I can't even keep my own story straight due to the grey matter decay
absolute kek
enjoy your painful, early, miserable death being a parasite in a hospice having a nurse collect your shit pans leech

>>11132123
Can you show me on the doll where the alcohol touched you?

>>11132024
I add pic related and garlic powder to just about everything I eat.
I'll add some cheese and stuff as well to things if I have it.
My problem is that I move around a lot for work, I work rotation, and live in a camper when I have work weeks (I know), and in my own apartment when I got time off, so most of my perishable stuff goes out on date all the time.

>>11132129
>Can you show me on the doll where the alcohol touched you?

>>11132141
xD

I like to freeze chain store pizza in plastic sandwich bags, then eat them frozen or microwaved in the bag. God, forgive me.

>>11132146
soggy pizza = best pizza

>>11132123
I'm buying a bottle tonight just so you can get a little angrier

>>11132145
>>11132175
>I'm buying a bottle tonight just so you can get a little angrier

I bake everything in the oven instead of on a pan as a crutch because I was never taught to cook and I suck at identifying if meat is cooked and not raw

And baking takes the guesswork out for me, I remember I once cooked a boneless chicken leg for da gf and it was half medium half well done

Please forgive me for sins

(Any tips)

>>11132181

>>11132184
slice or poumd the meat into thinner pieces
don't overheat the pan
carefully slice open the thickest part of the meat in the pan to check if it's done
don't keep the meat on the pan for too long so it doesn't dry

cooking is about feel and taste, it's rare to have fixed standards like "cook X for Y amount of time"

When I brown meat/onions for a stew/gravy/sauce I usually use a non-stick pan or dont let the food sit still w hile it browns, I have the urge to move it around

>>11128238
I like pineapple with onion on my pizza.

>>11132184
>Any tips

Boneless meat is piss easy, my dude.

>steak
High heat, then turn down to med once a crust forms. Usually only takes a couple of minutes unless youre trying to pan fry a whole roast or something. Turn over, poke it with your finger; if it's springy, it's done. If it's hard, you went too far.

>burger
Med-high heat. Wait for the cooked color to creep halfway up the sides, then flip and give it a minute less than the first side.

>chicken
Buy a thermometer; cook until it's 160 F in the middle. That's 72 C for you Pooropeans. If you can manage that, you're fine, as long as the outside isn't scorched black.

>fish
Same as burger: med-high heat, cook on the skin until the color changes halfway up, turn over and finish for a bit less time.

And remember to let your shit sit for a minute or two before you cut it, or it'll dry out.

>>11131714
you just cut the veg first then the meat later, boom problem solved.
seriously all health inspectors do is check your temps and labels, also they check the dishwashers test strips and make sure your hand washing stations all have soap and hot water.
plus you dont just shut someone down without immediate VERY critical risk points, you just get cited and have to fix the problem by the followup inspection

>>11131964
I feel like this is in the ballpark of dipping latkes in apple sauce.
I can get behind this.

My palette almost only consists of fast food because my mother's cooking was so shit

>>11132432
Nice victim complex.
Don't blame your mother, blame yourself, have some self restraint.

>>11132447
I was never taught how to cook in an aspect
We didn't even have a fucking stove and still don't

>>11131443

pukinganimegirl.png

>>11129986
Yo I’ve been eating it a lot recently. It is really good.

>>11132457
The internet is full of free knowledge, there's nothing that's stopping you from teaching yourself how to cook.
But it's easier to blame others than to better yourself, I know.
I'm a lazy shit too, and not the greatest cook, but I at least don't blame anything other than my own laziness.

I've cooked a filet mignon well done just because I like well done meat.
I also made a teppan chef cook one that way and I could see the disgust in his eyes. He tried to butterfly it and realized that wasn't going to work so he diced it and cooked it that way.

I'm not just a bad person, I also make people ruin it too

>>11132555
Crimes against humanity to be honest.
Very cute webm though

>>11131528
As much as it annoys me, i can't blame you.
Meek people are very easy to exploit, whether or not you mean to.

>>11132555
dogs are retarded

>>11132581
Nobody is safe from me and my meat
>>11132766
All dogs are shit

I love baking but i dont have enough self-control to let anything delicious i make to last.
So to avoid consuming too much calories, i eat maybe 1/3rd of whatever i made and throw the rest in the trash and immediately take it out to avoid picking it up again.

>>11128553
>peanuts in my coke
...when I do that at work, it's generally followed by the comment, "Y'all ain't from aroun' here, are ya?"

>>11131686
recipe plox

>>11132766
It was just avoiding potential danger in an unfamiliar situation. That is the opposite of retarded, really. Stay mad at... ? Don't even know what you're mad about, lol, but stay mad kiddo.

>>11128238
I use a griddle.
I haven't seasoned my cast iron in almost a year.
I use cooking spray.
I don't own a knife sharpener.
I fell for the veggie/fruit smoothie meme.

>>11128238
I don't know how to cut things properly

I eat ketchup witch almost everything that isnt sweet

I mix a can of tuna with a can of corn, drained and call it tuna salad.

>>11132184
boneless chicken breast is all about feeling. it shouldn't be soft and squishy if you press down on it when its done
chicken thighs and legs? just cook the fuck out of them. they can take quite a lot of heat before they're inedible. in fact I like them better a bit overcooked desu

>>11133907
>falling for the cast iron meme in the first place
You're beyond salvation.

I let things sit in the fridge for way too long, and still eat them.

I eat peanut butter and mustard sandwiches regulary (once a week or more) and i dont give a fuck what people think about it

>>11129962
Thats what poor mexicans do anyway, not that bad

>>11134352
t. iron deficient anaemic loser who works for teflon

>>11132555
My wife is the same, used to bug the shit out of me, she almost left me cuz i got really pissed at her one time when she orders a steak we were to share well done
Now i dont give a fuck and we order seperate steaks

>>11128262
Can you give me money?

I threw away chocolate every time it got moisture in it when tempering.

I tried to deglaze my cast iron pan, it tasted so fucking bad and I soon realized my mistake

>>11132959
>toxofag

I eat too much, all the time, I always feel hungry

>>11128266
>food additive that makes food taste better makes my food taste better

Msg is great and don't let soccer moms tell you otherwise

I use non stick pans to cook everything
I also throw in a heaping amount of butter and oil into said non stick pans for extra "non-sticky-ness"
I use metal utensils the entire time

>never cut pizza, cake, or any dish evenly, always do it so its annoying as fuck (pic related as example)
>this drives everyone insane, including myself
>I do it because the joy of pissing people off is slightly better than my OCD telling me its wrong

>microwave raw chicken and eat it

>cant be bothered cleaning a bowl so just pour milk into the cereal box, eat as much as I can then just throw the rest out

>get like 30 mcdonalds burgers when im drunk
>eat half while im drunk
>wake up and eat the other half when they're stone cold

>>11128238

I put cornflakes and a whole bar of dark chocolate in a toasted panini with peanut butter and banana

>>11128238
I like eating SPAM.

>>11128658
Your drinking not only endangers your life (worthless), but also other people's, like your neighbors (probably worthless but who knows). If your ultimate goal was suicide you would have done it by now; I suspect the reason you're still alive is because you actually already knew that you're a danger to others: you just want as many people to suffer as you have before you die.

>>11135595
that sounds lovely desu

everything I try to cook tastes bland.
I only eat like the same 3 meals every day and never buy fast food.
I stopped buying oil for my pan and just eat burnt meat

90% of what I eat these days is buttered white bread with peanut butter with a cup of coffee.

>>11134085
Not a bad source of protein if you're in a hurry, or don't have anything else, but doesn't exactly sound delicious,

>>11135169
Same, my teflon levels must be trough the roof, can't be that bad for you can it?

>>11128238
These chemical salty fckers straight out of the box. Its a passion.

>>11136038
>käsezubereitung
>Cheese preparation
Is that german for fake cheese?

>>11136038
Yes, or at least it says, theres a cheeselike cream in it and maybe one of the ingredients is cheese at best...

Well, fck u. The Pizzathing and the Iron in Pan thing triggers me.
>>11135169
>I use non stick pans to cook everything
>I also throw in a heaping amount of butter and oil into said non stick pans for extra "non-sticky-ness"
>I use metal utensils the entire time


>>11135448
>>never cut pizza, cake, or any dish evenly, always do it so its annoying as fuck (pic related as example)
>>this drives everyone insane, including myself
>>I do it because the joy of pissing people off is slightly better than my OCD telling me its wrong
>
>>microwave raw chicken and eat it
>
>>cant be bothered cleaning a bowl so just pour milk into the cereal box, eat as much as I can then just throw the rest out
>
>>get like 30 mcdonalds burgers when im drunk
>>eat half while im drunk
>>wake up and eat the other half when they're stone cold

>>11128658
Based and redpilled.

>>11136088
What did he mean by this?

>>11134596
I leave things sit on the stove for way too long and still eat them. (2 day old dried up chicken legs for lunch today)

>>11136053
No they wouldn't be allow to use the word Käse at all then. It's probably some kind of processed cheese sauce.

>>11128262
Why do so many /ck/ fags brag about their supposed six figure job. Dude no one cares you simp and 90% of the original food submitted is trailer park tier anyways

>>11131459
chirst dont you have tomatoes at least? that sounds really gross.

I use hot sauce on almost everything I eat, and always orders the spicy option of any food.

>>11136209
>always orders the spicy option of any food
Nothing wrong with this, if you're accustomed to it, the spice won't overpower the taste.
>I use hot sauce on almost everything
That better not be vinegar, I mean Tabasco

>>11129986
>>11132482
My brothers. That immitation crab is like sex. Fucking addicting. A Metro by me makes an immitation crab salad that would put you on your ass.

>>11136229
Do you like it better than real crab?
Crab is probably some of the best seafood in my opinion.

>>11132074
I thought it was because it's a neurotoxin.

>>11136301
Who wants to live forever anyways?
Drinking too much water will kill you as well.

>>11132344
Jew detected

>>11128238
The only pasta I eat comes from a box and the only sauce I use comes from a jar and costs less than $2.
I buy the "meat flavored" sauce and still cook beef to use with it just because I like the taste.
I cook the beef with olive oil, Worstershire Sauce, and an egg that I mix into it while cooking.
I cook the pasta until it's slightly softer than a piece of wonder bread.
After I assemble all the unholy ingredients I put a shitload of pre-grated bagged mozzarella and microwave it for 6 minutes so the cheese(?) is molten lava, then I stir it all together to make an amorphous blob of pasta, beef, cheese(?), and sauce.
I then eat the blob with a spoon as if it were peanut butter like the animal I am.
I do this almost every day.

>>11128575
I thought I put oil in it for some reason and started the car up for a few seconds so I could check the dip stick. I'm just glad no one else saw me.

>>11136407
Glassed pasta sauce is pretty alright I think, dolmio has some ok ones, nothing to write home about, but works well for an easy mid week meal.
Dried pasta is ok too, who has a pasta maker laying around?
The rest though sounds pretty horrible, overcooked pasta is gross.

>>11136301
>>11136318
it isn't a neurotoxin
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/28943112

that is just something huxters tell retards to get them to buy snake oil instead of regular food

>>11136407
wait, so how much does this shit cost and how long does it last you?
>sauce
>beef
>worcestersauce
>mozzarella

and all this is without counting the non perishables like
>olive oil
>eggs
>pasta

>>11136407
>Worstershire

>>11136479
misspelled but accurate

>>11136407
Was fine until the "I eat this almost every day" part

>>11136478
>wait, so how much does this shit cost
Pasta: about 60 cents on sale
Sauce: already said
Beef: around 6-10 dollars per package depending on the size, usually use half per meal
Worchester sauce/eggs/oil: honestly can't remember
Mozzarella: 2.50 per 2lb bag

Lasts about a day or 2 since I eat the leftovers throughout the day, tastes better cold sometimes, sometimes it tastes better slightly microwaved.

>>11136201
I do this too except most of the time I just use Franks Red Hot sauce. The times when I am not feeling lazy or feel that buffalo wing sauce is a poor addition to some ethnic food I will switch it up with a hot sauce I think it appropriate or I just break out a jar of chilis preserved in oil or vinegar.

>>11136209
I do this too except most of the time I just use Franks Red Hot sauce. The times when I am not feeling lazy or feel that buffalo wing sauce is a poor addition to some ethnic food I will switch it up with a hot sauce I think it appropriate or I just break out a jar of chilis preserved in oil or vinegar.

>>11136927
>jar of chilis preserved in oil
My man, do you fuck with the ones stuffed with feta cheese? They're like crack, even better right out of the oil still dripping, I can only get them in small plastic containers where I live, wish I could by them by the jar.

>>11128291
Pee eggs?