/ck/ - Food & Cooking

>>10923402
nah. If my crap looked like that I'd go to the hospital.

>>10923402
Yeah actually, I've been very drunk on it.

>>10923402
Real moonshine is

>>10923411
So it's not really moonshine?

>>10923414
I mean it is but it's highly regulated. And depending on your state really depends on the alcohol content. Moonshine is essentially home made high proof grain alcohol

>>10923402
Tastes like gasoline smells

>>10923436
Florida it's 70 proof

>>10923402

i live pretty close to where this shit is made. the salted caramel is the best flavor and fuck yes this shit is good nigger

>>10923402
That particular brand is not. It doesn’t taste great and it’s only 100 proof. The actual shit isn’t bad if you get it from someone who knows what they are doing. Blackberry or peach in the summer can’t be beat. Plus that shit is way overpriced, I can trade weed or game from hunting trips for the real stuff but even if I had to buy in the store I’d rather just get a drinkable bourbon, same price. If you get your hands on some actual white lightning be cautious, it will fucking destroy you if you aren’t careful (or a legit alcoholic).

t. East Tennessean

>>10923414
If it wasn't made in some hillbilly's tub, then it ain't real moonshine.

>>10923659
I'm in the panhandle I think it's 80 proof. I got friends out in bama who make shine, pretty good stuff. I usually get a jar for special occasions

>>10923680
in college in southern VA my buddy's dad used to be a shiner, every time he went home he'd bring back a couple jars

>tfw set up camp on your front porch at 10am and crack open a jar of apple pie to sip on all day while chain smoking bogies, shootin the shit and hittin the gravity bong

simpler times my man

>>10923402
I'm from Miami, but fled during the hurricane, and had to keep traveling north because there were next to no lodgings in Georgia or the Carolinas, so I ended up in Knoxville, TN.

Was my first time in flyover country. There is nothing to do in that area, food isn't very good, so I asked people for recommendations. They all told me to go to Gatlinburg, said it was a wonderful place, great food, activities etc.

It was the most bizarre place on earth. There is an entire theme park devoted to Dolly Parton, with people who worship her, it's very cult like. I saw one women crying at a Dolly Parton trailer recreation. People were buying Dolly merchandise, and Dolly music was playing constantly. Everyone was morbidly obese, eating non-stop fried foods, like deep fried candy bars. After wasting my time there I went to Bud's Gun Shop which was the highlight of my trip and I got to shoot some machine guns with some hillbillies.

The final part of my trip was a visit the Gatlinburg "strip" which was more deep fried food and of course Ole Smokey Moonshine Brewery. They had like 30 flavors of moonshine all equally revolting, The girl who served the drinks was cute in an inbred kind of way but she had a small deformed hand like the guy from Scary Movie. After taking the 'moonshine tour' I was pretty blasted, went to a bar, drank more and met this real fobby chinese girl with a fish face and fucked her brains out, but couldn't cum. So I went to sleep with aching blue balls, woke up drank more Ole Smoky moonshine and masturbated again until I went to sleep. Then I drove back to Miami.

peach didnt turn out bad. High proof but smooth.

>>10923855
oh shit i been to dolly world too went when i was like 10 or 11 i remember having fun there but i'm pretty sure if i went now it would probably suck a bit me,my brother and my mom got to participate in some double dare thing they were having when they did some promotion with Nickelodeon

>>10923855

t. spic who has never been outside of kendall

>>10923923
t. spic from westchester buddy, get it right.

>>10923855
As someone who lives near Knoxville and goes to Gatlinburg fairly often, this is pretty accurate. The food tastes good if you can stand the grease.

>>10923855

>goes to a place with beautiful rivers, scenic hikes and history
DUUUUUDE DEYS NOTHING TO DO

>goes to the biggest tourist trap he can find
WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS CORNY SHIT I BE TOO SOPHISTICATED FO THIS

stay dumb, stay miami

>>10923855
Knoxville has enough to do if you like the outdoors or drinking. Sure it’s no Miami. We can’t all be from cities populated by failed New Yorkers, inbred South American plutocrats, and every sewer rat that’s managed to crawl out of the Caribbean, but we make do.

Going to Gatlinburg was pretty much the worst place you could have gone since you didn’t seem to be able to have a sense of humor about it. It’s like sending a first time visitor to Miami to that run down Jai Alai place in Hialeah.

Stay in South Florida. Hopefully your descendants won’t move here when your entire state is underwater in a couple centuries.

>>10923763
Good memories. One day those days might return. Not anytime soon.

>>10923402
Yeah, that apple pie in op’s pick is pretty good in some hot apple cider. Really cozy way to get fucked.

>>10923402
Get some friends from the countryside if you want decent moonshine. Get some old Slavs living in solitude of eastern Poland, and you get godlike moonshine. You may not survive, but it's worth it. They can make it above 90%, but it feels like it's below 20%, so you can drink it like water. If you have the guts, ask someone of spirit of the forest.

>>10923402
I think it's stupid to call that moonshine, since it's produced legally and taxed by the TTB.
Do real moonshiners try to get creative and add variety to their mashes, or do they mostly stick to just corn? I imagine cost factors into their choice of grain, but corn seems like it'd get boring.

>>10924048
They use whatever's at hand, but "authentic" moonshine is usually a mix of corn, barley and rye.

>>10923870
How do you incorporate flavors without cutting the proof too much?

>>10924143
Infuse with froot

friend of mine made moonshine out some of their wedding cake. it smells like pain but is otherwise pretty gud

Any yall ever had honey brandy moonshine?
I was out in virginia and knew this guy whose buddy made shine. Gave me a jar of this honey apricot stuff that was amazing.

It legit pisses me off I can't legally make it for myself.

>>10923855
On behalf of everyone north of Okeechobee, get fucked.

>>10924048
from what I understand, it's basically whatever produce or grain you can get for cheap, so it's highly regional.

In some areas, apples are plentiful, so you'll see apple pie moonshine. Other places grow lots of peaches or apricots, and the farmers will sell the leftovers for cheap to shiners, and they'll mix it with a rye shine.

So, yeah, they experiment.

>>10924155
Ive tried that with blackberries but it still doesn't taste right.

The whole idea of "moonshine" is "illegal shit you get from some hick because it's not legal", historically whiskey that's clear because it's not aged. Some corporate bottle of focus-grouped ethanol isn't moonshine, that's kinda the exact opposite of the term.

Soon introducing: Bath Tub Crank™, amphetamines with a home grown flavor!

That said, as far as kitschy bottles of ethanol goes, Ole Smoky tasted alright when I bought it from the shopette once.

>>10924224
Interesting

>>10924224
I've asked cops tons of times in multiple states and they all said it's legal. It's just illegal to sale

>>10923855
Based post.

I was given a jar of Midnight Moon apple pie moonshine as a Christmas gift and it’s just whisky with a bit of apple flavor, whereas real home made apple pie moonshine tasted just like apple pie.

>>10923402
no, it tastes like rotting corn mash with a bunch of strong off flavours

>>10923414
Yeah ok

>>10925426
Huh?

>buying branded moonshine
This is the most yuppie bullshit, I swear to God.