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2023-11: Warosu is now out of extended maintenance.

/cgl/ - Cosplay & EGL

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7439434 No.7439434[DELETED]  [Reply] [Original]

Confession thread? Confession thread.
Contributing!
I am a tomboy,a big one. You'll never see me wear a single skirt or something too feminine and let alone a dress. I hate my boyish chunky body and my boyish face (unflattering in feminine attire) despite faking a lot of confidence. But I drool over lolita and similar cute crap all the damn time....Feeling so depressed since weeks bc of this shit but don't feel like giving up muh boy side (insecure as fuck without it) I really do wish I had the balls to build a small secret closet full of cute feminine stuff. Plus there is no cute styles to wear when you're a boy (no pastel colours for me meh). Maybe one day? (Also got an unhealthy obsession to look like a BJD I'm so ashamed pof myself jfc)

>> No.7439440

I used to be like you anon, but I was 14.
Let go of your tomboy side and frill up, you don't need to act like a delicate flirty flower or anything just because you look feminine. That's nonsense. The way you look has nothing to do with what kind of a person you are, nor does it make you more shallow/vain than a man.

Wear whatever you want, just don't act like a braindead retard "to get boiz :3" and you'll be fine.

>> No.7439451

>>7439440
Yeah thanks anon. I should listen to you. But I just feel so damn insecure without my boi side.

>> No.7440517
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7440517

>that feel when you will never see OP try on lolita/girly clothing for the first time and see her blush and shit when you say she looks cute

>> No.7440524

>>7440517
This is fucking cute and tsundere

>> No.7440546
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7440546

I'm super envious of all of my friends who aren't in school right now, work one or two jobs, and are buying all the lolita they want.

Meanwhile I'm stuck in grad, in a shit program at that. I'm studying stuff that I'm completely uninspired about, am bored, stressed, and severely depressed.
And I might be able to forgive ALL of that, if it wasn't putting me in veritable debt and preventing me from doing things that I sincerely enjoy (I had no debt as an undergrad and I remember being so much happier). Beyond lolita, I wish I had it in me to read for pleasure and to buy books; can't do either because reading is now a fucking chore and I can't afford new books for myself either. I haven't written a poem in months even though that's another thing I loved.

>inb4 incoming advice
Don't bother, I have no spine to stand up for what I want. I'll never face my family and tell them I want to drop out, how I don't want to go to law school either, and that it's time for me to fully focus on making myself happy and not what they want for me.

My family are cunts and I'm stuck leading a life I don't want to live.

>> No.7440555

>>7440546
Are you me? I'm stuck trying to get this stupid chemical engineering degree right now and pretty much want to drop out. I'm not doing terrible, but I hate math and science. q_q

>> No.7440566
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7440566

>>7440546
Sounds like you need a beer

>>7440524
No, you are

>> No.7440568
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7440568

>>7440555
>I'm not doing terrible, but I hate math and science. q_q
Same. Last semester I got all As, but there's mounting pressure to start my dissertation work (which I am beyond words behind in doing). Lots of people already look down on me because it's an English program (yeah, I know), but I'm reading two 300 page novels a week plus the follow-up work, and I'm supposed to be doing all this fucking research. I just...no.
>mfw parents still talk about me going to law school after this like it's a foolproof way for me to get employed
I hate them so much.

>> No.7440629

I have another tall, skinny female friend that cosplays, and I get stupidly angry when she does the same characters as me. It's really dumb, and I obviously never say anything to her face (because why invite drama) but whenever she says she's working on something I'm working on, I get a little mad. She considers me her cosplay senior, so it really bugs me when she asks me for advice on how to make the same outfits. I know it's irrational, but I feel kind of possessive of the characters I choose...

>> No.7440637

I secretly want to be an e-famous lolita which I have the brand/money to help me along but I worry about my face and my weight and my personality. My mother keeps pressuring me to go to school for something but I just can't commit all that money and energy to something I don't love and I hate the idea of being stuck in a boring job all my life. What I really want to do is move to San Francisco and get a job at the AP shop there and whip the business into shape. I've been in various stages of customer oriented positions since I got my first job and I really think my professionalism could help them build a better reputation but its hard to even wrap my head around moving all the way across country for a job I may not get.

>> No.7440639

>>7440637
If you have the money, then take a trip to SF. Ask to talk to the owner and present/sell your ideas? Don't give too much away, obviously. Have everything documented when you're there.

>> No.7440641

>>7440566
N-No i'm not you b-baka anon!!

>> No.7440644

I had several dreams where I stole the closet of some lolitas or e-famous people like pastelbat and got away with it...aah if only...

>> No.7440647

I wish I could still be friends with R but since she's blocked me from her life and probably still hates me for stupid decisions I made a couple of years back, I don't think it will ever happen. I've grown up as a person since and I'm also a lot happier with myself. Either way, here's hoping you're doing alright.

>> No.7440651
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7440651

I'm studying to be a translator, I already got my license.
I never thought I'd be making lots of dosh but I thought I'd at least get a comfortable salary. But recently, I overheard a future colleague complain about the profession being shit because you get mistreated, ignored, forgotten and all for shit pay.
Now I'm second guessing my choice, and I wanted to do it ever since I was a little girl.

>> No.7440656
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7440656

>>7440641
m-muh heart

>> No.7440659

>>7440651
Get a second opinion, or do your own research. Maybe said person is just having a bad time right now or they're burned out, have a bad boss/company, etc. If you're American look up the Department of Labor's occupation handbook, it has average salaries/some facts about many professions.

>> No.7440660

I want to have korean tier surgery to refine my face and body, but im not unattractive. I just really dont like my body type (large ribcage, hourglass figure, muscular thighs, decent boobs) i wish i had a smaller body. Id really like to be the teensy cutie pie girl but i physically cant. Luckily though, my boyfriend has said he loves my body and all that sappy stuff, so i dont get too down about it. I still kinda envy those girl though

>> No.7440665
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7440665

>>7440659
I'm not American, Northern European (un)fortunately.
I've heard it's okay but only if you work for a company and not a publishing house, or even better if you own a company. But I know fuck all about business and spill the spaghetti whenever I interact with people too often.
I know I shouldn't care because "it's more important to do what you love" blah blah but I don't love being poor an not having money for kids or a house.

>> No.7440681

>>7440665
Well, it's around €2500, just looked up, which is... Sad, for our standards. My boyfriend makes that much as a night security guard with little experience.
Well... fuck me.

>> No.7440685

>>7440681
To think you need so much training and education to get that measly salary.

>> No.7440782

>>7440629
I'm sure she's not doing it to spite you, anon. I'm in a bit of a similar situation, except I'm the one who wants to cosplay one of the characters my friends does-- except she's the prettier, taller, more popular one. I was told by someone else that me doing that same cosplay would probably lower her self-esteem (even though she's done some of the same characters as me in the past, and vice-versa), so I backed off even though it was a character I really wanted to cosplay for myself, not to be competition for her. It's been a year and she still hasn't cosplayed said character, and I still really want to. It kind of irks me because I would have cosplayed that character a year ago and I still really want to, and she's not even actually doing it. I wouldn't have minded so much if it was going to be a huge cosplay for her, or the one character from that series she has picked to cosplay, but that wasn't the case, and she's done/planned other cosplays from the same series. Including one I specifically chose (not only because I loved the character but) because at the time they weren't on the list of characters she wanted to be from that series.
I wish there could be no drama when it came to cosplays like this, and everyone could just be whatever they want. But no matter what, in everyone's minds, it really is a competition in one way or another. I really don't think any cosplayer can deny they want to be the best.

>> No.7440797

>>7440782
Yeah, I know she's not doing it on purpose, but it still sucks. We do some group cosplay stuff, too, so when we do stuff together, there's never any conflict. It's always the others. And while I know my work is as good or better than hers, I still feel sorta possessive of characters that I've chosen. Sigh.

>> No.7440803

>>7440797
I feel you. It really does suck. Once you identify with a character, it's hard to go back.
She's not doing the character at the same time as you or anything, is she?

>> No.7440813

>>7440803
No, she's doing it for a different con, which is good. It's just super weird to have her asking advice (since mine is half finished already) on the same project.

>> No.7440815

>/cgl/ related:
I'll always be too fat for lolita because I'm a man. Even if I lost another 30 or 40 pounds my chest would still be too large to ever fit in the cutest brand pieces....

>unrelated:
I've convinced myself that I'm ugly. I can't get any boys to hit on me ever, except for the ugliest of uggos. And the worst part is the guys that I do like are all straight so what's even the point.

>> No.7440820

>>7440813
Oh, okay. I guess that's not so bad. But yeah I would, too, I think. Does that mean she'll get this character done before you? It's weird she's asking your advice when you haven't finished, I dunno. I feel like it'd be a lot less weird if you had already finished and been the character.

>> No.7440823

>>7440820
Yeah, and it wouldn't bother me as much if that was the case! Like, if someone asks me about my signature costume, I'm flattered rather than annoyed. But when you're both making it at the same time, it's just weird.

>> No.7440825

>too ugly to do anything
Ugly bros WW@
>>7440815
You can try crossdressing.

>> No.7440848

>>7440823
That's totally understandable, anon. If it keeps up, (ie, the next cosplay you work on, oh look who else wants to do the exact same thing! And wants you help!) maybe talk to her (or one of your mutual friends?) about it? I dunno. I wouldn't want it to turn into a drama shitfest, either, but it is a little sketchy if it happens more than once.
For now, I hope this is a one-time thing you have to deal with.

>> No.7441231

>>7440660
I know this feel, and sometimes lament growing up in the Western world. I feel like I'd be smaller if I grew up in Asia instead.

>> No.7441241

>>7439434
Is that you Aoi ?

>> No.7441242

I have a really bad addiction of buying cute stationary and masking tape from Japan. I have 30 rolls at least and while theyre under 3 dollars each and at least 20 letter sets, i dont send enough letters for it to be worth it.

>> No.7441287
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7441287

I haven't liked my face my whole life. Only disliked my body since about last year when I came to cgl and found all the flaws with it through the criticizing of other girls. And now that the relationship with my boyfriend since highschool has faded out over a year I dislike my boobs. They were the only thing I had no problem with but now I pay attention to them more since he's gone. The areolas are like 3 inches across and luckily I'm white as a ghost so they're pink and not brown...but that also means the veins are very visible. I hate them now. Never thought I would.
It's a whole other problem knowing I'm searching for a new guy but it'll take months for me to get anywhere, And I'll be self conscious about them if I do land a guy. My old bf liked them but we were also both virgins and he is beta as hell. Someone who's seen more than one pair of tits might not be the same.

I've become so critical of my looks. This board doesn't help me but I can't stay away. Now there's literally nothing I like about myself.

>tumblrwhine.mp3

>> No.7441288
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7441288

>>7441287

>> No.7441329
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7441329

>>7439440
This, I went from dumpy to put together. I was really similar to you nix the "boy side". I was really insecure so I hid myself in baggy tomboy clothes. It didn't help that I had an ogre moon face when I was chubby.

There's nothing wrong with wanting to look cute, and looking cute doesn't mean you're a delicate fragile flower.

It took me till fairly recently(about a year) to get confidence, what helped me was realizing that I should (mostly) dress for myself and (mostly) not care so much about what I think others will think.
I say mostly because you should still adapt given the situation. ex: not wearing a miniskirt to work and such.
>>7441287
I would try working on your confidence before getting into a new relationship. It's different for everyone but^ was the start for me.

Also your boobs sound really, really normal, and pink is pretty ideal colour wise. I've personally never disliked being as pasty as I am, you can always try tan/self tanner.
I can promise you that no guy will have any issue with your boobs unless they are literal pancake tits.
>>7440660
I sort of do too. I don't think I'm 'ugly' anymore but my eyes are factually really small compared to my big round face, and my nose is short and wide but I probably won't because my family and boyfriend wouldn't be very happy, and it's a rather vain thing. The recovery and chance of it turning out horribly/me dying on the table due to complications also outweighs any lasting insecurities I have about my face.

Your body sounds quite sexy anon, even if you aren't petite all the way around you can definitely still dress in a lot of cute styles.


My confession:
Ever since I got a job I've been pretty much blowing all of my cash on clothing and food I don't need. I've also just started getting into Lolita and I've been finding it difficult to say no, so I have to leave the tab open for a day or two before I close it without buying.
I'm usually really thrifty and save my money religiously outside of food

>> No.7441338

>>7441287
if a guy doesnt like you based on your breasts, there's something wrong with them. breasts arent whats actually important in a human being.

>inb4tumblr

>> No.7441353

>>7440665
It totally depends on what you translate. I an Finnish and specialize in EU translation and let me tell you, I rake in cash like crazy. I got head hunted for a German company and I now live in Köln.

However. I did a Master's in political law with a focus on economics.

Another person who studied with me and never graduated works nowadays with Google.

>> No.7441398

>>7441353
Ah, well I'm mastering in translation studies. There's the trouble.
I'll never be a legal or medical translator, just one of those sad peons that get paid peanuts :(

>> No.7441463
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7441463

Crazy shit happened at work today.
We've been understaffed for quite some time but we still manage to get everything done, only because we work like niggers. Since this piece of shit company got gg'd financially it was bought off by Tesco but its still doing pretty shit so hiring another employee didn't seem likely. So today we had our daily group huddle and some guy was introduced and we all welcomed him. I later saw him come out of the womens changing room, he dressed like a guy and talked/acted like one. Me and my coworkers were surprised.

Looks like OP got a job at Fresh and Easy

>> No.7441478

>>7441463
Maybe he is trans or genderfluid or a boi or whatever?
Or just did not find the right changing room?

>> No.7441502
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7441502

Convention photography is the reason I'm starting to get very bitter towards my friends.

I'm not a photographer (I just have a fancy camera that I tote around while in cosplay/lolita). Even though I'm not a professional, I make sure my photos are nice. When I take photos of people I always take them at a higher angle looking down (NEVER down looking up!). This is proven to make people look slimmer.
I make sure they're under flattering light.
If their poses are a bit derpy I give them direction. If in the first shot they had a weird jawline or other derpy flaws I take another.
When I get home I edit them. I liquify fat rolls on people, remove zits, and fix costume flaws. I use filters if they're particularly flat.
And if I can't fix them I don't post them publicly at all unless the person specifically asks for them.

And yes, I do this entire process for what usually amounts to over 100+ pictures.
When I post my convention hall pictures, they get multiple likes (these are just amateur hallway photos mind) and the people in them are very happy. I care about making people feel and look good.

That said: I wish people had more consideration when taking convention pictures of me.
Almost every single one that I was tagged in this year was unattractive and unflattering as fuck. Nobody likes these pictures because they're me looking my absolute ugliest, they look like a different person they're so bad.

What's worse is that the friend usually adds a caption like "Anon is so beautiful<3" Sure, my double chin, uneven composition, and bad facial posture underneath lighting that gives me facial shadows like a spook just accentuates my ~beauty~, ASSHOLES--but no, this is the thing: I can't tell if they're actually trying to slight me or if they just have shit aesthetic taste. I try not to take it personally since all of their photos tend to be shit too, but it gets my goat.

>> No.7441524

>>7441502
>I always take them at a higher angle looking down (NEVER down looking up!). This is proven to make people look slimmer.

Are you crazy? The reverse is true. Lower angle shots make your legs look longer/etc. Surely you've seen how most pro photogs will crouch down or kneel when shooting free-hand.

>> No.7441525

>>7441502
You're not alone anon.
I don't really take cosplay pics of my friends but when I do I take a ton of pictures, give them some direction, ask them to do different stuff that I think might look flattering.
They just snap a few and move on.
To me it's an experience thing, I've realized looking good is as much up to the photographer as it is the subject. I don't think everyone realizes it. I didn't realize it until a few years in. So I wouldn't be too bitter about it. Hopefully, they'll realize your photos are better, and put 2+2 together.
We are also our own worst critics. So maybe you do look pretty good, but you KNOW it's not your most flattering pose but your friends don't.
Remember, they see you in full 3D HD from all angles all the time. Looking into a mirror isn't really the same effect. They are used to your weird angles and random derp faces.

>> No.7441529

>>7441398
I wish you a lot of luck and hope you'll get a nice job nonetheless, we translators need to stick together. If I've learned anything, is that hard work trumps even the baddest of lucks.

>> No.7441532
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7441532

>>7441524
>Lower angle shots make your legs look longer/etc
But it does nothing for people with pudgy upper bodies and round/fat faces unless you're giving them oodles of upper body direction (which to be blunt hardly nobody at conventions do).
Not everyone can be treated the same with angles.

>> No.7441537

>>7441532
Oh and to me it's easier to elongate legs and a person's overall body with an editing program than it is to remove a double chin and liquify upper body bulkiness. But that is just me.

>> No.7441543
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7441543

>>7441524
Diff anon but low angles tend to look like ass.
Professionals are doing it because they know what to do to make them look flattering. The average con goer doesn't.

>> No.7442002

I struggle with an untreated mental illness (can't get help) and I have hit a trough in my cycle. I'm tired of always being like this, and I've seriously considered suicide. My mother has a lot of medication that was prescribed to her so she can recover from her chemotherapy. I might end up taking that, along with her prescription painkillers, maybe slice up my wrists as deep as I can go to try and leave quicker

I've thought about hanging myself, but I don't want my parents to find me in the house like that. I can't get a gun, but even if I wanted to, (... which honestly, I'd rather do that) I don't want them to clean up my mess. Going by pills is apparently really painful, but I don't believe the mess to clean up afterwards is as bad. My brain won't be splattered somewhere on the carpet. We have a train, but that conductor might feel bad for hitting me. I want to die and not affect people as much as possible

I've considered killing myself in the woods behind our house. That changes things. I could get a gun, call the police and tell them where I am and what I'm doing, and then shoot myself. That way, yeah the police or whomever would have to clean up my mess, but at least there's a chance my parents won't have to see much of it.

Personally, I believe my parents and everyone would get over my death quickly, but I think there's trauma induced no matter what if you see a dead body that has had a bullet go through its head. Maybe I'm wrong.

There's also a bridge near where I live. I could tie something heavy to my feet and jump off, but then I have to drown and drowning sounds awful. If I took a few big breaths while under water, maybe I'd lose conscious soon? Don't know.

I live near a major city that has skyscrapers, so jumping is a possibility. There's also a bridge you have to cross to get into the city, and I think if I just jumped from that, I'd drown without any weights. I also have an access to syringes.

So many options, I don't know what to do.

>> No.7442013
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7442013

>>7442002
>I've thought about hanging myself, but I don't want my parents to find me in the house like that
So don't do it in the house and do it someplace where someone else will find you.
Suspension hanging (cutting off the arteries in your neck instead of traditional hanging) is very easy to accomplish.
Mick Jagger's girlfriend did this recently with a scarf. She strangled herself with the scarf with a doorknob (and this woman was 6'3).
Hang yourself in the woods.

If you need out, then that's probably the best way to do it. Godspeed, anon.
>inb4 butthurt because I'm helping someone

>> No.7442020

>>7442013
why didn't I think of this. Thank you anon.

>> No.7442029

>>7442020
You're most welcome. It's quite painless compared to almost all other methods besides legal euthanasia.

Last week I slipped into a major suicidal slump and tried to hang myself in my closet with my camera strap. Made myself pretty purple, but I backed out. I'm personally not satisfied yet for non-existence, plus I'm very unprepared to leave right now (college debt that would likely get sloshed onto my parents; no items organized to give away; a beautiful farewell letter not prepared).

The problem with suicide attempts is that they can often be too spur-of-the-moment.

>> No.7442033

>>7442002
Anon, the suicide of a loved person always leaves an impact. No matter if you leave behind a mess to clean or make your body disappear, the people around you will be sad. And every time they remember you they'll think why didn't they notice something was wrong or all the things they could have done to make you feel better. Suicide doesn't destroy just one life, and I've never met a parent who has been able to recover from the death of a daughter or a son.

I've wanted to die before. My best friend also considered suicide for the best part of her teenage years. And even though our lives are shit right now there is nothing we want more than to keep on living. I know it's easy to say it's better to live and really hard to actually keep doing it, but it is worth it. You'll miss so many good things and people in your life if you end it now. I know it sounds trite but it's the only thing I can say. Please Anon, reconsider it. It's not worth it.

>> No.7442039

>>7442002
Why can't you get help? What is your mental illness?
If you jump off a bridge, you will probably die from impact on the water's surface. Also consider that most jumpers regret it halfway down. Plus, there will potentially be media, your parents will have to deal with that.
The idea of telling police what you are doing, or maybe leaving a note or something and going to a remote location is a good idea. Maybe even give GPS coordinates so no random person will find you.
I'm sorry you have come to this. I hope whatever happens, it is peaceful.

>> No.7442061

>>7442020
Please don't, unless you have no debts or dependents. You're better off as merc on a suicide run. Try signing up, they give you all the drugs and training needed to perform.

>> No.7442168

>>7442039
I'd rather not say, I used to go to therapy, and I have been diagnosed by a psychiatrist, but my parents are very against it now. I am at at the age (over 18, but not by much) where I can't go out and get professional help without their consent.

>>7442061
I have no debt or dependents, except for my cat? Maybe? And maybe. That's not a bad idea. But I'd rather do something quickly, if you know what I mean.

>> No.7442184

I have a thirst for power that I can't really satiate and never have been able to. I want to control people so badly. I've wished every year to have telepathy so I could more easily do it. Being born royalty would have been nice too. Unfortunately I find it very hard to make or keep friends because of this attitude. I try to repress it enough but my entitled attitude always surfaces and they get tired of me. It's always been a part of me so I have so idea how therapy would go. It's not like I want to hurt or abuse people either. I would be happy with absolute control over one person. Luckily I found a girl who seems open to the idea. She's really cute, submissive, and talented, so my hopes are high!

>> No.7442189

>>7442168
Wow, fuck your parents. That's fucking horrible.
I don't supposed it's possible, to wait a year or two and go get help on your own? It's not too unfeasible, it's what happened to me. I paid for my own therapy sessions because my shitbag parents only want to believe in Dr. Phil.
You could also try a "cry for help" stunt that would force them to institutionalize you, then maybe you would get the help you need and deserve.
I'm so sorry you have to go through this, anon.

>> No.7442240

>>7441329
Are 3 inch areolas normal? I told a friend one time and she was like wtf. I never see them posted around the internet and described as pretty. I know it won't matter to a guy if he really loves me but I still wish they were smaller and my ideal of perfect so I could have something I'm really happy with.

>> No.7442255

>>7442240
Mine are that big too anon, I feel you. I also figured that there aren't that many really weird looking dicks around the internet being praised, but pull down a guy's underwear and any odd breed of trouser snake can jump out. So there's no reason why it isn't completely normal to have weird proportions when you only get a standardised image of sexy bits.

>> No.7442261

>>7442240
Not a dude, bisexual girl, but I think big areolas are really sexy, so I'm sure plenty of guys like them, too. The internet is a terrible place to compare your body to; try not to think about what you see praised online as an actual ideal for many dudes. And, if all else, cosmetic surgery might be able to help you. I know I used to hate my breasts and had to work to like them; I hope you can find a way to feel more positive about your body and your looks.

>> No.7442279

I love lolita, but I'm extremely terrified of asian people. Wearing J fashion in front of asians makes me really uncomfortable. My school has a lot of asian kids in it, despite there not being many asian in the area (it's strange, I don't know where they come from.) I wish we could purge my land of yellow people so I can go to school in my kawaii shit without feeling uncomfortable.

>> No.7442304

>>7441287
I feel the same way. I'm insanely insecure about my looks, even though people are always telling me I'm pretty. I know I could be way worse, but I'm just never happy with anything I have.

>> No.7442317

>>7442279

Don't worry - you'll get made fun of by white people and asians alike!

Only niggers will like your pedophile clothing.

>> No.7442319

>>7442168
Why can't you say?

>> No.7442329

>>7442279
where do you live?

>> No.7442335

>>7442279
Me too, anon. I feel like they're going to think I'm trying to be Asian or something.

>> No.7442339

>>7442240
According to the mighty Wikipedia, 1.5 inches is average but up to 4 inches is normal. So your nipples are safely within the normal range but twice the size of the average. Another site made me laugh because it said that if you are naked enough to see nipples, men are usually too happy about that to care about or notice their size.

>> No.7442350

>>7442240
I really don't think anyone would ever prefer large areolas over smaller ones but does it really matter? I highly doubt anyone you're going to have sex with would walk out in disgust if they suddenly see your nipples are larger than normal. Everyone has parts of their body that are weird and they're insecure about. Either save up for surgery if it bothers you that much or live with it.

>> No.7442387

>>7442350
>I really don't think anyone would ever prefer large areolas over smaller ones but does it really matter?
We live in a world with deviantART, I think the possibility of someone liking big areolae over small is pretty reasonable

>> No.7442409

So, I'm pretty sure my long-term, live-in boyfriend is gay.
I've known he was sexually attracted to men for a while, but I figured he was just bisexual.
We haven't had sex in a while (probably close to 7 months) and I feel incredibly lonely.
I want to break up with him and get my own place but I'm kind of dependent on him financially and mental health issues prevent me from getting a full-time job.

>> No.7442413
File: 98 KB, 500x375, 2383294.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7442413

>>7442409
I'm not trying to insult your intelligence anon, but have you actually said "Hey bf, we haven't had intimacy in a long time and I feel like you're not attracted to me anymore. Is that true? Because if it's not then why aren't we in bed having hot, nasty sex right now?"

Shit, if I knew I was going to break up with him anyway I'd be blunt like that.

>> No.7442415

>>7442409
Well, have you talked to him about the lack of sexual relations?

>> No.7442423

I'm so fucking NEET and I have no idea how to get a damn job. Every place I go to is all, "Nope, you're going to school in August so you won't be here long enough." which is reasonable for them but fucking crap for me.

I also can't stop spending money. I just made a Taobao order that's going to cost upwards of $400 and I'm going to a midnight movie of Captain America with $25 tickets- I just can't stop.

Please send help.

>> No.7442426

>>7442387
Yes there are fetishes for everything, but it's a very niche market. I think the majority of people are always going to prefer smaller nipples.

>> No.7442428

>>7442423
>which is reasonable for them but fucking crap for me
Actually that sounds really fucking unreasonable of them. Are you applying as full or part time?
Most places will be happy to work with schedule flexibilities like that. Mind, you probably won't get a lot of shifts, but it's something.
Yeesh.
Do you mind namedropping these places?

>> No.7442434

>>7442426
>Yes there are fetishes for everything
Big areolas aren't fetishes.
>http://www.007b.com/nipple_gallery.php
Guys are going to just deal with the fact that tits don't all look like what they see in porn.
Same thing with women who think that all men are circumcised and have pretty looking dicks, because they certainly don't.

>> No.7442436

>>7442428
Hell, I'm applying full time, part time, and temporary.

Toys R Us, Panera, McDonalds, Maurices (a clothing store at the mall)- just basic starter places. I'm, like, cursed for jobs, I think.

>> No.7442441

>>7442436
Oh Maurices. Don't worry about that, the local Maurices rejected me a couple years ago too. Basically if you don't look fashionable enough to the managers (aka someone they can socialize with) they won't hire.

McDonalds though? They're full of shit. I'm not sure about Toys R Us or Panera but you should have been able to get McDonalds. I would keep applying there, keep calling.

Do you live in an area where job competition is tough?

>> No.7442443

>>7442413
>>7442415
Of course I've talked to him about it, but he always denies anything is wrong or changes the subject. I'm just kind of at a loss for what to do right now. It's not like I haven't tried initiating sex either, I'll literally try to give him a blow job or get naked on top of him and he'll push me away and say he's tired, it's so frustrating.

>> No.7442446

>>7442423
Are you a girl? Consider camming or getting a sugar daddy if you're that desperate for cash.

>> No.7442449

>>7442443
End the relationship.
You've reasonably voiced your concerns and he hasn't felt the need to listen and act upon them.
You deserve someone who will give you the attention anon....and a nasty sex limp.

>> No.7442450

>>7442446
Okay. Thanks for the advice.

>> No.7442453

I don't want to chime in and say that all your problems are first world as fuck but...some of you really need a more positive outlook on life.

I was given stabilization pills for my cancer relapse today, after starting chemo last June. I have been dealing with this illness for over 2 years now and it has impacted every single area of my life.

I have lost parts of my body, all of my hair, the athletic physique I had with spinning went away and was replaced by a skeleton looking me.

It is hard trying to follow any kind of style when you clearly look so out of the norm.

>> No.7442455

>>7442449
Seconding this. Or at least start saving up if youre financially dependent on him.

>> No.7442459

>>7442446
how the fuck do you find a sugar daddy? i tried seeking arrangement but it seems like everyone on there is looking for an escort or a girlfriend. i just want someone to give me money for burando. pls

>> No.7442464

>>7442459
>escort
Shit, I would've taken it.

>> No.7442476

>>7442459

I don't know about other girls, but my sugar daddy was an overweight beta virgin Mexican I originally met on Gaia. Almost all of my burando is thanks to him so from personal experience I'd say find the biggest loser with money and suck up to him.

>> No.7442478

>>7442464
yes, but i am a tiny girl and i'm paranoid about meeting someone solely for sex

>> No.7442484

>>7442436
I dunno about where you live, but I worked at a children's clothing store a year ago and they always hire tons of college kids for the summer only because that's their biggest shopping season. Try one of those. (If it matters I worked at The Children's Place.)

>> No.7442498

>>7442449
>>7442455
Thank you, that's what I'm probably going to end up doing.
I don't want to sound like a weirdo but I really needed the advice and I don't really have any female friends to talk to about this kind of stuff so your replies mean a lot.

>> No.7442504

>>7441502
I know the feel anon. It's the photographer's curse, always great photos of everybody you know, but shitty photos of yourself. I honestly wish I had a clone so I could just take my own photos of myself

>> No.7442513

>>7442478
If you're worried about abuse/being taken advantage of I would avoid all relationships based on money. They can sour quickly, and men who pay for things after awhile start to feel entitled to what you give them.
Go with anon's suggestion for being a camgirl, that way you have a reasonable barrier between you and your clients.
>>7442498
No problem anon, you deserve it. I hope you find the right guy.
>>7442504
>I honestly wish I had a clone so I could just take my own photos of myself
Yes, this.

>> No.7442518

>>7442434
Original anon here, mine look almost exactly like the first column, 5th from bottom. Big and transparent skin, veins showing. Definitely not what is considered pretty, but...the anons here are right, it won't matter to the guy. I just wish it didn't matter to me so much. I'll just have to learn to live with it.

>> No.7442520

>>7442339
How do you even measure it properly? When mine are soft they're really gross looking and a little over 1.5, but when they're hard I think they look nice and they're a bit under 1.5. My nipples change drastically when soft/hard and I wish they always looked the way they do when they're hard as they make my boobs look a lot nicer.

>> No.7442524

>>7442387
Girl who likes girls here, I really like larger ones but they have to be the right type. I think they look really good when the girl has larger boobs and her skin is pale and her areolas are pink and the difference in color between her skin and her aereola is slight. And when the color is slightly translucent/speckled in a way? I would post a pic but this is a blue board.

>> No.7442525

>>7442518
Oh anon, you have cute nipples and guys will like them.
Even if they didn't they can fuck right off.

>> No.7442531

>>7442168
But your cat will miss you. :(

>> No.7442606

>>7441353
>political and Econ. Law
University of Helsinki international master's? Nice!
Too bad they only take in law students :(

>> No.7442651

I don't have any close friends who share my weeby interests anymore and it makes me sad. I only occasionally watch anime and whatnot, but the closest I have is my boyfriend who likes JPop and will also listen to Malice Mizer in the car with me.

>> No.7442657

I bought an item from a big online store and when I washed it, it shrunk to a child's size. I told the company that it never arrived and they refunded me... I feel really bad as I've never done anything like this before. This company can afford it as they are very successful and I've spent thousands of dollars with them over the years, but they were so nice about it that I feel so angry at myself now. I didn't even think that they'd do it.

>> No.7442664

I wish I could talk to my boyfriend about lolita. That is, I wish he would remember what it is even called. When I wear it he says it looks like schoolgirl's outfit or like a maid, and he gets all "why are you even wearing that? you look so beautiful already now you look silly blah blah blah". He doesn't stop me from trying to wear it, but he just doesn't get it and is so oblivious. I can't believe he can't even remember what it's called. My ex used to even remember the names of prints I really wanted.

>> No.7442667

>>7442657
I wouldn't feel too bad about that, Anon. They would have probably done the same thing if you has told them how it shrunk when washed. Especially since you are a regular good customer.

>> No.7442668

>>7442657
That's really not that bad, anon. Considering you're clearly a loyal customer. If you don't mind me asking, what store is this?

>> No.7442670

>>7442667
>>7442668
I suppose it's not as bad considering that I've spent so much with them and this was about $20, but it's still really dishonest... It was with ASOS.

>> No.7442682

>>7442667
>They would have probably done the same thing if you has told them how it shrunk when washed.

I doubt that if the tag gave instructions on how to care for the piece.

>> No.7443055

>>7440637

Well there's an attention whore/unicorn who moved from Chicago to SF and "worked" at the SF AP store, supposedly by selling herself out and she wasn't even an official employee.

>> No.7443094

im kinda like this too, wouldn't be caught dead in a skirt unless its lolita, i see it as having a chance to embrace your feminine side so even if you want to keep the two seperate i say go for it, its fun and you get to discover a whole different side of yourself

>> No.7443151
File: 63 KB, 166x408, 1392312000133.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7443151

Same, OP. I always get told that if I wore more feminine clothes I would look better, but I feel that feminine clothes show too much skin or something, it's just embarrassing. I absolutely love lolita, cute skirts, dresses, etc. but I don't think I could ever wear that kind of stuff. I would like to change, but I wonder if beginning to wear cute stuff at my age (19) would be a waste of time.

>> No.7443156

>>7443151
>lolita
>showing to much skin

Orthodox/old school lolita make you show your face and fingertips only...

If you are worried about showing to much skin, invest in a bunch of socks and thights. You are not bound to show any skin at all.

>> No.7443182

I've decided to start losing weight. I'm going slow as hell about it taking baby steps, but I figure I'll get there eventually with enough self-discipline. So in the mean time I'll just sit and fantasize about owning a tiny wardrobe of lolita/mori. I'm just worried I'll end up being a case of "10/10 body, 1/10 face" since I born with a lot of moles and I'm so adverse to makeup (even hypoallergenic stuff) I can't figure out how to cover them up.

>> No.7443295

>customer said I looked 14
>relished it

>> No.7443301

>>7440815
It sucks being gay because your chances of finding ANY gay like yourself in the population of your gender narrows down to 10%, and then you gotta pick out a person you're actually attracted to emotionally AND physically out of that 10%. And even then that may not work out so much you. can go find someone else as easy. Its a lonely and hard life being gay.

I hope it works out for you anon. I know you're not as ugly as you think you are and I doubt you're ugly at all, your options are just limited. (And so are the unkempt guys)

>> No.7443304

>>7441287
I have areolas like that, plus flat nipples, plus sag, plus they're only B/C cups

>MFW not even Sad frogs face is as sad as mine

>> No.7443308

I was like OP and no one ever looked at me, people pointed and laughed etc
Then I started dressing girlier (but modest), and now it seems that if I don't dress like a tupence skank no one even pays attention to what I say. I don't want to be fawned over, I just don't want people to ignore my existence and pander to the girl with a big cleavage next to me instead.
I dress in classic Audrey Hepburn-style clothes and so many times it happened that the bus is full and out of the lot of people waiting, the blonde in tight yoga pants gets let into the driver's compartment out of "generosity" while old grannies and I soak in the rain.
It might be that I just live in a shitty country, but I went to a job interview and of course the pretty girl in a low cut Juicy tshirt got hired, all I was told was that I'm "overqualified" even though I had no experience.

>> No.7443334

>>7442423
It could be worse but it's relative.
Be glad you have taobao and movie theater tastes instead of wanting to buy new JetJ every few weeks and fly here and there for the weekend, lol.
I don't open the bills right away, but I do pay them off every month or 2, thankfully.

I think if you don't get too far in debt it should be ok once you finally do find a job. But it can get away from you quickly no matter your budget so be careful.

>> No.7443350

>>7442657
What were the washing instructions? Did you follow them?

>> No.7443394

GOD

FUCKING

DAMN

IT!

I am so sick and tired of a very good friend of mine. She's unhappy in her current relationship and hints at wanting to start one with me.

We've been friends for over a decade, she knows me like no one else and has helped me through some serious rough spots and I love her a lot, but I never, ever want to start anything romantic with her.

When we were teenagers, we'd imagine a life together that would be super awesome, we'd live together and have lots of adventures. These were fantasies of course and at one time we did almost moved in together as friends.

It often feels like she treats my sexuality as a sort of emotional cop out, like being a lesbian somehow doesn't qualify as a relationship the same way heteros do. Throughout the years, she has known many of my girlfriends and if I was in the middle of a fight with someone I was with at the time, she'd listen to me vent and offer advice. She assumes that somehow a relationship is easier with another woman. It isn't. It's a relationship and needs constant work to sail smoothly.

It's so frustrating and I've told her many times in various ways that it will not happen, but she acts as if it was still an eventuality.

>> No.7443401

>>7443394
She's seeing it as an eventuality?
Maybe she's in love with you.

>> No.7443409

As a guy I actually really like the idea of wearing girl's clothing, specifically stockings and skirts. I just think they're really cute and I wish that I could be a trap for a convention or something. But I know literally no one who is or had been a trap before so I don't really have a network of people to guide me through the process.

>> No.7443432

>>7441287
>tfw when puffy nipples and pale veiny skin
I can't stand it

>> No.7443489

>>7443409
Don't feel down anon! I started crossplaying on my own with only myself and the internet and I did alright. There's a learning curve of course, but we all gotta start somewhere. If you crossplay at a convention you're bound to find like minded people to make friends with and help you out. It's a lot of fun and as long as you research correctly and practice I know you can succeed.

>> No.7443516

>>7442168
Anon, denying you the medical or psychological care you need is abuse. If you're going to do something to get the police involved, call a child protection agency. Look up a kids' help phone or something similar in your area and explain your situation. They might be able to put you in touch with someone who can either help you without involving your parents or get you out of the house altogether. I'm not saying it would be easy, but it would be better in the long run.

If you end it now, you'll never get the chance for your life to improve. If you keep living, you can still make it better.

>> No.7443525

>>7440660
this is exactly me. so voluptuous white girl.

>> No.7443552

>>7442002
http://lostallhope.com/suicide-methods/statistics-most-lethal-methods

I would suggest shotgun to head in the woods, theres the least chance of surviving and being a cripple in the hospital and its the most pain-free. Maybe take a bus somewhere and then do it so your parents wont see you until they bring your body back. Perhaps megabus if you're east coast, tickets are like $2 way in advance.

>> No.7443647

>>7443409
It shouldn't be too hard anon. You can always order women's clothing online but check that the store has a returns policy.
There are companies that make stockings for plus sized women, which you might find fit better.

>> No.7443652

>>7442002
Just go to a low-traffic location, call the police directly before you do it (like, less than a minute, ideally, so they find you and clean you up but can't stop you.)
And just be completely sure. Suicide is a viable option if the pain of living outweighs the benefits, but something like 97% of the people who survive jumping off the Golden Gate bridge have said the regretted it on the way down, which is scary shit.

>> No.7443668

>>7443647
I'm 6ft and barely above average weight and these fit nicely. M/L of course
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B008VWS402/ref=ox_sc_act_title_3?ie=UTF8&psc=1&smid=A3HNBMKU5LEH7V

>> No.7443688

>inb4 youre a bad friend for thinking this

So I have this friend that I feel like she fakes her naivety. She makes a lot of sexual references, some of us will laugh and shell just go " what- what? Im so confuuuused" but then shed turn around and make a comment about sucking dicks. I dont get why she does it.
Shell undress in front of single guys (like bare titties/almost naked in panties), and go "they're just boobs! I dont get iiiit" But she wont do it infront of guys who have gf's. I think she knows what shes doing, and pretends she doesnt understand.
she says " I dont get it, confuuused, what-what? WHAT?" so god damn much I literally get a head ache.
I don't understand why she does these things. I'm not about to "use ma pychology powurz to diagnus u " or shit like that, I really wish she would just tell me why she does that shit.
My other friends get so fed up with her most times, as do I. I love her, I'd throw bones for her, I'd bail her out of jail, I do most anything for her, etc. But I wish I knew why she acts naive on purpose...she doesnt just do it around guys, shell do it around people who are in relationships too (to keep up appearances?)
I'm assuming it some personal issues (that I will not discuss) that made her do these things but at the same time...getting naked infront of a guy in our hotel room? thats a bit much.
Anyone got a friend like this?

>> No.7443745

>>7443688
I used to be best friends with someone who did pretty much those exact things. She was actually one of the most clever people/best at reading others that I ever knew. She was also Asian, and played up the stereotype of the innocently-sexual azn girl if she thought someone would buy it. It was basically an easy way of appearing nonthreatening to people, especially guys, and getting a one-up on them in this way (it was more comfortable for her to be thought of as nonthreatening and a sex-kitten type than viewed with suspicion for being too cold or acting better than people), but it frustrated all of her friends because we knew she was just playing the fool and liked her actual intelligent self better.

>> No.7443939

I shoplifted several times.
From AP and Baby included

>> No.7443944

>>7443939
I only ever stole lolita things.
I even stole things from girls I didn't like in my old comm. I got a full outfit this way. And so many accessories.

>> No.7443948

>>7443944
(by full outfit,I mean,some meetings were at their houses and I managed to take a OP or a skirt or a blouse or a JSK from their closet by absenting myself to the toilet or something and I am so small and innocent looking that no one ever suspected me. I wear it better than them anyway)

>> No.7443954

>>7443948
(And I would stuff it in my bag the better I could or hide it under my petticoat) I would feel this fear of being caught but when I would come home with this trophy I would be so happy. And keep it to myself. Sometimes I even stole things I didn't liked in the end and sold them

>> No.7443966

>>7443939
>>7443944
>>7443948
>>7443954
you bitches have problems.

>> No.7443969
File: 782 KB, 848x477, 1389239923656.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7443969

>>7443939
>>7443944
>>7443948
>>7443954

>> No.7443977

>>7443954
>>7443948
>>7443939
>>7443745
Seems like lies in attempt to be edgy desu

>> No.7443987

>>7443954
Charlotte Charms is that you?

>> No.7443994
File: 2.99 MB, 355x201, 1394259278657.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7443994

>>7443987

>> No.7443993

>>7443939
yeah no you already tried this last time and no one believed you. Go away.

>>7443944
>>7443948
>>7443954
charlotte charms is that you?

>> No.7444003

>>7443977
Not that anon, but stealing isn't that uncommon, and if you have the courage to I don't see why they wouldn't steal lolita rather than candy from a store for example. Not to say that it certainly isn't a lie, but I really wouldn't be surprised if they are telling the truth.

>> No.7444002

>>7443987
>>7443993
Charlotte stole lolita stuff and stole from other lolitas?!
tell me more about it i want to know everything

>> No.7444012

>>7443993
>>7443987
charmsmind lol

>>7444002
Yes, she stole a moitie choker from a "friend", lied about getting it at a convention and was called out on it
she sold it and the person who bought it gave it back to the person charms stole from

>> No.7444022

>>7444002
Pretty much what this anon said (>>7444012)

I tried to look up the getoffegl post about it for you but it looks like it's been deleted.

>> No.7444028

>>7444012
Wow that was really sweet from the person who bought it. Thanks anons. I never really heard about her,is there any more funny drama since I'm bored to death today?

>> No.7444042

>>7444022
Really? Deleting things on getoffegl gets you a permaban. It was adamine who posted it I think.

I'm surprised that there are so many people who didn't know about this stuff though.

>> No.7444113

>>7441543
lol at the thickness of low angle.. o how i know thee

>> No.7444128

>>7444003
That's really shitty logic
A lot of shoplifters and even professional shoplifters won't steal from mom n pop store, let alone from friends. The idea is along the lines of sticking it to corporate/big stores have loss built into their margins anyway.
So yeah, stealing candy from wal mart =/= stealing stuff from your friend.
I find it kind of hard to believe no one would notice and corroborate these stories if it's true though.. no one noticed a whole dress missing? ooookay...

>> No.7444132

>>7444128
I agree. The AP and Baby USA stores have like no stock and all of it's documented. They'd definitely notice.

>> No.7444138

>>7444132
Notice but what are they going to do about it?
And I meant more along the lines of friends chatting and realized they're all missing something for no reason. But then again, lolis pretty much invite scammers to rip them off en masse (oh, you promise you shipped it out? well, it's weird that it's taking six months to get from Florida to New York, but I believe you!), so they probably wouldn't do anything even if they did realize something was up

>> No.7444171

>>7442002
>>7442168

hey sad anon, if you are still here, are you a girl or boy and do you live in the US? there are a lot more resources for abused women but there's still some for men you could find, especially with help.

not only that but obamacare covers mental health services, and if you have no income they aren't going to charge you a bunch of money. If you need to move you but you can't deal with working you can get on disability which probably gives you some kind of health care too. you can also get SNAP (food stamps) which will pay for groceries as long as it's not premade food but it will probably be around 200$ a month which is enough to feed yourself, also if you are worried about your cat there are pet food stamps you can apply for.

I'm sorry you are in so much pain, I'm assuming that you have already tried to talk to your parents that you need help and they ignored it? If you haven't made it really clear you need this because you can't deal with your mental illness right now you might want to try, but it sounds like your parents have decided not to take care of you and so you are going to have to take some steps to take care of yourself, but there are resources to help you, and I would say you aren't powerless to help yourself right now.

It sucks, but some people come from abusive homes, whether sexually, physically or emotionally, and sometimes the only ways to make it stop are moving out - even if the kids are minors, or dying. There are social workers and other organizations that understand this and I urge you to look into these places so you can have a life and not be so unhappy and not feel like the only way to stop everything bad that you feel is suicide. You might feel like you are being a burden on the 'system' but in reality this is exactly what the system was set up for.

>> No.7444192

>>7442409
he probably is bisexual and just isnt attracted to you anymore. Just talk to him.
why dont people just fucking talk anymore? jfc

>> No.7444210

>>7443688
>>7443745
> mfw I am that friend

Sometimes it's just easier to feign ignorance and appear as non-threatening as possible. Play dumb in other words. I think 'fake it until you make it' applies, especially when with the 'I'm confuuuuused' (as in she wants to know WHY you are laughing, to better orient her jokes for next time).

As for the undressing part, it could be because she doesn't care about guys seeing her tits. It's 'just boobs' to her. The reason she hesitates to do it in front of guys with gf is less because of the guys and more because of their gf (as in what will the gf thinks- remember, gotta be non-threatening).

Of course, I'm not your friend so I can't say anything for certain.

>> No.7444246

I have a physical disability that fucks with my self-confidence big time. I don't seem to be able to approach girls I like because I feel adequate. I am fairly successful in my studies, to sports 3-5 times a week, but it all doesn't matter. I have a tight net of friends (mostly male), I am able to socialize and be invited to parties, but I haven't been able to throw a party in forever. I have no idea how to approach dating or anything of the sort. I sort of keep myself busy by educating myself, reading, engaging in political activities at my University, delving into music... but I would really like to progress from this, get a solid stable girlfriend that I can plan my life with. I just wanna be happy honestly.

>> No.7444263

>>7440629

How about you inform her in time about what cosplays you plan on making, so you guys might choose different ones? Come on, be courageous and tell her how you feel, if she feels that you're her senior I doubt that she'd want bad blood between you two.

>> No.7444514

I will never find a qt3.14 gf even if I look good because I'm always at home masterbating and watching anime. True story

>> No.7444549

>>7444246
What's your disability if you don't mind?

>> No.7444866

>>7442453
I'm sorry that happened to you. I'm sure you'll be fine soon.

>> No.7444874

>>7443308
where do you live?

>why is that girl still wearing juicy

>> No.7445076

>>7444549

Shortened neck as well as a heightened shoulder. I look like a physically fit version of Quasimodo. (Well, not quite that bad, but it still majorly fucks with me.)

>> No.7445372

>>7442002
I'm so, so sorry you're in so much pain. Do you have anyone you can talk to about things? I know it doesn't seem like it right now, but there is always hope. I read this earlier, it seems pretty relevant:

http://mattfraction.com/post/63999786236/sorry-to-put-this-on-you-but-i-have-an-honest-question

Nobody deserves to feel the way you do, but you won't feel this way forever. I really hope you get the help you need and deserve.

>> No.7445390

>>7444874
Eastern Europe.
Fashion here arrives at least two years late.