Mental and identity crisis in lolita/jfashion

[Anonymous No.10705393]

How do you cope with a identity crisis while being in a Japanese fashion? What are some way to help fix my mental being in a fashion that has standards?

[Anonymous No.10705395]

Go to therapy

[Anonymous No.10705400]

>>10705393
Find a therapist.

But legit, this post is so vague I’m pretty sure you’re baiting. What does fashion have to do with your identity crisis? Do you only have identity crises when you’re clothed?

[Anonymous No.10705401]

>>10705393
Seek therapy

[Anonymous No.10705404]

Cringe b8 gtfo

[Anonymous No.10705433]

how do some of you still believe that therapy works?

[Anonymous No.10705435]

>>10705433
It helps a little bit and it’s better than buying japanese clothes and thinking it will help a tranny mental state

[Anonymous No.10705436]

>>10705433
it doesn’t if you’re expecting the therapist to do all the work for you and you stalwartly decide that you cannot change and cannot be helped. being mentally well takes effort for people who aren’t well naturally. have you tried trying?

[Anonymous No.10705459]

>>10705433
t. person that has never had an insightful thought or ever contemplated anything that was said to them in therapy for more than a millisecond

[Anonymous No.10705461]

is this the ita that defended bondage girl on cof and takes upskirts consistently

[Anonymous No.10705463]

I'm pretty sure this thread was made just to stir shit about girl in OP pic, seeing as it was a recent insta post of hers.

[Anonymous No.10705504]

>>10705393
Unironically get off CoF and IG and any other lolita social medias (incl here). I havent posted a coord anywhere in like, 6months or more and I feel better about my coords and stopped caring so much. It feels better. Being constantly hit with the dopamine of social media constantly fries your brain and warps your perception of what a lolita should be. Its just someone who wears clothes not some model with picture-perfect sets and shit.
Also get away from the rampant consoomerism in the community. Stop checking sale sites daily. Don’t buy the cheap junky clolita fast fashion shit. Handmake or thrift jewelry of accessories to actually feel a real connection to what you own. Don’t buy shit you may not wear and just curate a grail wardrobe.
TLDR: stop looking for the dopamine fix from the internet and just accept you’re just wearing clothes for you. This is just my thoughts as I felt super shit about lolita for a long time until I stopped caring idk its your life

[Anonymous No.10705506]

>>10705504
this. i don't post on the internet at all and i'm really happy about it.

[Anonymous No.10705528]

>>10705506
>proceeds to post on 4chan

[Anonymous No.10705530]

>>10705504
>Handmake or thrift jewelry of accessories to actually feel a real connection to what you own
Legit this. When I started out, I spent $200 on accessories just for holy grail lolita coords. I regret it so much because my friends used to gift me jewelry and friendship bracelets that I basically threw aside for a bunch of generic strawberry cake bows whatever because "it doesn't fit my coord" "isn't lolita enough".

[Anonymous No.10705531]

>>10705528
4chan isn't social media in the same way IG and CoF are retard

[Anonymous No.10705551]

>>10705528
i mean like pictures...

[Anonymous No.10705717]

>>10705461
Who?

>>10705504
This is a helpful option anon

[Anonymous No.10705741]

>>10705393
I turned off Instagram notifications and generally don't bother following many people except those I really get inspiration from. They're usually so far out of my follower count league that I don't compare myself. It's nice to feel like I have something to work toward

[Anonymous No.10705784]

i'm soon to be 26 and age is starting to show. i'm not as skinny as i once was (BMI 22 when i used to be BMI 18) and looking at my past idols such as kotakoti yukapon,which, was a terrible choice of an idol to have as a teen i know, make me realize i'll never be like that or like them ever. i'm too old now, i'm too big and too grown to ever reach that peak of cuteness ever.
considering offing myself before i reach 30, i don't want to get old and no amount of skin care and sunscreen will change the unavoidable

[Anonymous No.10705786]

>>10705784
bro how bad is your skin that at only 26 u look like ur aging

[Anonymous No.10705805]

>>10705433
therapy is a tool, you have to actually use it (read: fucking try) if you want to get better

>>10705504
this honestly. I don't have a shopping addiction and I do adhere to a budget, but when I was buying stuff frequently I still felt really unsatisfied with my wardrobe, like I didn't have enough things to do this or that properly and kept wanting to buy more. I stopped buying things cold turkey, even if it meant passing up nice releases, and six months down the line I actually feel more satisfied than I did shopping regularly. Now I focus on handmaking stuff and thrifting/antiquing and it's been much great, much better than wasting a couple hours a week poring over autions and LM. gets me out of the house too.

[Anonymous No.10706045]

>>10705393
Ok didn’t know this was a whole white women cat fishing on thread picture. Google image was something

Social media is fake and not real. A lot of the things put onto it is a photoshop false reality of things. To better help improve your mental always take a look off social media.

[Anonymous No.10706047]

>>10705433
Some people find it easier to forget rather than talking about it. It depends on how bad and the severity of the persons mental health is.

[Anonymous No.10706342]

>>10706045
She looks white in the picture, I don't get how anyone would confuse her for anything else. Her chin, her eyes, her nose. Do people really think hime cut = asian?

[Anonymous No.10706347]

>>10706342
yes, they do. And apparently non-asian people aren't allowed to do asian inspired makeup either,

[Anonymous No.10706438]

>>10706342
>>10706347
Looks like two completely different people

[Anonymous No.10706442]

>>10706347
not to racebait but most non-asian people look completely shit with asian inspired makeup anyway, so the wokies are doing you a favor. doing makeup that suits your own face is way better.

[Anonymous No.10706452]

>>10706442
no, people look like shit when they don't know how to do makeup to suit their faces. most people don't even know their face shape. you can't just copy makeup, you need to suit it to your own features. i'm mixed tho so what do i know.

[Anonymous No.10706474]

>>10706452
True, Different face features =different makeup techniques to suit. If this girl is trying to mimic a Asian using heavy meitu filters and photoshop, then, I can’t imagine how they look without those filters on top of their Asian inspired makeup. There’s no way that >>10706045 matches besides having possibly deep eye sets? Might have to review her photos to actually get a clear reference.

[Anonymous No.10706476]

>>10706474
Her attempts could be trying to look wasian at least.

[Anonymous No.10706477]

>>10706474
>>10706476
even if she is, does it really matter? it's annoying but mostly because of the other cringy behavior attached. it's not a problem until she starts claiming that she's part asian. if she wants people to assume that it's up to her, but it's just weird until she begins lying.

[Anonymous No.10706491]

>>10706477
This is retarded thinking
Obviously weebs are going to pull this bullshit of suddenly being Japanese.

[Anonymous No.10706522]

>>10705393
an Identity Crisis can come from many places, but in your question you've already hit on an important point; your interest in Jfashion should not be connected to your identity crisis, but if it is than that's immedietely a sign that you've become too obbessed with it and should back the heck off until you've spent a considerable amount of time in professional treatment.

Any hobby, whatever it is, should never be so ingrained into you that it can be tied into or assoicated with having a part to play in an Identity Crisis. If it is, then you need to stop and shelve that interest to spend sometime learning who you are without it. A healthy sense of self should be definable to yourself and easy to describe to others without naming hobbies. Hobbies are things that stack ON TOP of who you are, they should never be part of what makes you at your core.

[Anonymous No.10706546]

>>10706522
Cringe response

[Anonymous No.10711185]

your identity crisis stems from the fact that you worship a country that probably hates you and try to look like the ugliest hipsters it has to offer
read up on nihonjinron and go to therapy

[Anonymous No.10711265]

>>10706045
In the lower left photo she’s wearing heavy makeup with a cut crease that exaggerates the size of her eyelids, of course she’s going to look even whiter in that photo compared to the top photo, which is taken from a slightly higher angle where you can’t see her eyelids as well. Having black hair ≠ “Asian fishing”. She still looks white in all of these photos.

I feel like all the woke “fishing” accusations stem from a deranged, narrow-minded train of thought that all people from X race share X features and no one else can possess those features.

[Anonymous No.10711271]

>>10711265
>I feel like all the woke “fishing” accusations stem from a deranged, narrow-minded train of thought that all people from X race share X features and no one else can possess those features.

Agree. It's heavily narrow minded, considering most caucasians in America are heavily mixed. Americans have American features, because we're a melting pot. Features don't even belong to a "race." It's ethnicity based.. Such a weird place for people to get on a high horse about features attached to ethnicity, when no one is one ethnicity unless recently immigrated.

[Anonymous No.10711279]

What’s wrong with being white? If Jessica nigiri pulls it why even fake it? What’s with the sudden people wanting to change their race in the west?

[Anonymous No.10711280]

>>10706045
Why does this reminds me of this shit

[Anonymous No.10711339]

>>10711279
Because zoomers are always dying to get oppression points by pretending their race or gender ID is not cis and white. Just going bi doesn't cut it anymore because no one cares as much about sexuality as they did in the late 2000s/early 2010s.

[Anonymous No.10711376]

>>10705433
Normies and self deluding

[Anonymous No.10711377]

>>10705528
It's still on the internet

[Anonymous No.10711379]

>>10706347
People will always bitch about something. Just stop caring and continue to do your thing

[Anonymous No.10711382]

>>10711339
>Just going bi doesn't cut it anymore because no one cares as much about sexuality as they did in the late 2000s/early 2010s.

That's because a white man in this day and age can't get a job anymore in America (even qualified). Ironically, I know too much from working in corporate America.

[Anonymous No.10711411]

>>10705433
Therapy works if you do the work. Therapy isn't done to you, like many people believe. It's not just talking at someone and then your life is better. It's a lot of hard work, and your therapist is there to guide you and help you figure out the path to feeling better.

Most things done in therapy can be done on your own, but a lot of people lack the self-discipline to do so, which is where therapists come into play. But again, lots of people don't think therapy works because they never did any work during it.

If your therapist isn't ending the session with homework, a to-do list, or something to work on between then and the next session, find a new therapist who is actually interested in helping you, because there are lots of them who are shite.

[Anonymous No.10711480]

>>10711411
I would argue that therapy only works for stuff like personality disorders or trauma, and even then you have to put in the work to see results.

If you have schizophrenia or other disorders, don't even bother. Most therapists are so fucking shitty and CBT ain't gonna cut it.

[Anonymous No.10711482]

>>10711480
Schizophrenia needs medication mostly. But coming from someone dating a schizophrenic with potentially DID, he needs talk therapy because he doesn't process his problems correctly and is unable to internalize.

There's reasons for why a schizophrenic would need therapy, because people who are the type to take advantage of people cling onto them due to their very very naive ways unfortunately. It's a perpetual cycle of shit.

[Anonymous No.10711486]

>>10711482
>because people who are the type to take advantage of people cling onto them
Yeah, which is why I said most therapists are garbage. They will take your money and do nothing - and how is someone with schizophrenia supposed to differentiate that from a "good" therapist?

[Anonymous No.10711499]

>>10711486
No, but they NEED someone to help them internalize and sort their thoughts and feelings. Therapy is good for that. Just because it didn't help you, doesn't mean therapy doesn't help a lot of people.

[Anonymous No.10711507]

>>10711382
Oh shut up

[Anonymous No.10711510]

>>10711382
Kek yet still whites are the overwhelming presence in basically every corporate field. Have you considered that you suck and aren’t half as desirable as you think you are? I know white men do struggle with accepting that last bit.

[Anonymous No.10711532]

>>10711499
When did I ever say therapy didn't work for me? You're saying that schizophrenics get taken advantage, and they need therapy to internalize their thoughts. All I said was that *most* therapists are shit and cannot do this for schizophrenic people. They will gladly take advantage of someone for $150 a session.

[Anonymous No.10711658]

>>10711510
I'm not a man, I just am aware based on hiring ethics in actual large corporations. Sorry you work in a shit tier front end job, but in adult jobs it ain't what ya think.

[Anonymous No.10711659]

>>10711532
Bro, most people have insurance when they go to therapy. That's 10~20$ a session. It's really no skin off anyone's back to get help with internalizing problems.

[Anonymous No.10711703]

>>10711659
>Bro, most people have insurance when they go to therapy
Glad you're privileged enough to hold down a job with benefits to go to therapy for your seasonal depression.

[Anonymous No.10711713]

>>10711703
why are you arguing with someone who thinks people with psychological disabilities just needs therapy.

[Anonymous No.10711718]

>>10711480
Therapy works the least on personality disorders. It's a known fact that they are permanent

[Anonymous No.10711731]

>>10711718
Except for BPD, which literally has one of the highest recovery rates of any mental illness/personality disorder, and most people grow out of it by the time they're 30.

[Anonymous No.10711751]

>>10711731
https://psychnews.psychiatryonline.org/doi/full/10.1176/pn.47.9.psychnews_47_9_26-a

completely untrue but cute cope

[Anonymous No.10711762]

>>10711703
>you're privileged enough to hold down a job
You realize that it's not privilege to hold down a job, right? What are you, a teenager?

[Anonymous No.10711793]

>>10711751
I said "one of," and yes, some other Axis II disorders also have a high recovery rate.

Your own article states
>“Long-lasting remissions are very common in both groups, and recurrences of symptoms, though more common among BPD patients, are low in both groups. The longer patients in both groups are remitted the lower the chance of recurrence for both. So there is good news for BPD patients—while they are functioning more poorly than patients with other personality disorders, they are still functioning well in the symptomatic realm."

>https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/15615665/
>https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/21804844/
>https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/7755119/
After 2 years, the adolescents in these groups only had between 35-50% still meet a BPD diagnosis.

>https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/22737693/
After 16 years post-diagnosis, almost 80% of people with BPD in this study had at least 8 years of remission.

>https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/11704940/
After 27 years in this study, 92% of patients no longer met the requirements for BPD.

[Anonymous No.10711813]

>>10711718
No? Personality disorders aren't permanent. Keep telling yourself that, BPD whore.

[Anonymous No.10711815]

>>10711762
With benefits, you absolute mongoloid. You also ignored the fact that we were talking about actual clinical disorders like schizophrenia, and not the fact that you go to therapy because your dad didn't love you enough.

[Anonymous No.10711820]

>>10711815
Anon, my boyfriend is the schizophrenic / DID. Yes talk therapy helps people, but he needs drugs more than anything. Also you're completely misguided because you should be seeing specialized therapists to your condition. DID literally has a whole "merging" of personalities thing within their therapy, or did you just skim the surface of all therapy and group it in with each other?

[Anonymous No.10711822]

>>10711820
Why are you lumping in DID with schizophrenia?

[Anonymous No.10711824]

Half you retards have zero reading comprehension

[Anonymous No.10711825]

>>10711815
Also, get a job, seriously. I think this whole 'woe is me, no money, therapy doesn't help' is such a victim mindset shit complex. There are jobs all over the place with benefits, that are even fucking remote. I think your problem is just stupidity.

[Anonymous No.10711826]

>>10711822
It's a co-morbid. Why can't you read?

[Anonymous No.10711827]

>>10711825
When did I say I didn't have a job? I was just pointing out you are speaking from a life of luxury, and that you have zero consideration for people that live different lives, or live in other countries.

[Anonymous No.10711828]

>>10711826
DID is a fake illness for larping teens. Tell your boyfriend to grow up.

[Anonymous No.10711845]

>>10711828
>Therapy doesn't work
>Jobs with benefits are impossible
>References teenagers obsession with DID in reference
Anon, I can tell you're the jobless teenager posting on here by this post. Realistically, I'm not sure why any of this matters to you unless you're schizophrenic and you think you're above therapy. And if so, well, either get it or end up in a psych ward, or jail for the rest of your life. I've learned enough about how fast the incline goes into a downhill rollercoaster, so enjoy. Eventually, if you don't go the route of therapy then you'll end up in either jail or a psych ward. Enjoy.

[Anonymous No.10711847]

>>10711828
>In my 30s
I'm sure that's a cure. Get idea. I'm sure he won't cut himself up or others anymore with that method. Smart.

[Anonymous No.10711864]

>>10711847
Why are you even with him? Couldn't find a mentally stable partner? What's wrong with you?

[Anonymous No.10711896]

>>10711864
NTA but why are you so miffed about someone being mentally ill?
A large percentage of this generation and the younger ones have some kind of mental illness because we live in an endless hellscape. Grow up.

[Anonymous No.10711915]

>>10711896
>A large percentage of this generation and the younger ones have some kind of mental illness because we live in an endless hellscape. Grow up
That's not how schizophrenia works. I'm just curious why nonnie is with someone so fucked up? I seem to have struck a nerve with you. Maybe grow up and learn not to take words on the internet so seriously

[Anonymous No.10714571]

>>10705393
Elaborate upon the nature of your condition.
What sort of identity crisis are you experiencing?
Go into detail

[Anonymous No.10714576]

Speaking of changing races and excessive photoshop, this chic needs help too. She shoops the shit out of herself

[Anonymous No.10714578]

>>10714576

[Anonymous No.10714586]

>>10714578
why make your eyes so wide. just looks weird

[Anonymous No.10714620]

>>10714576
>>10714578
God, I had to block her because she kept being recommended to me. It's so disturbing to me how someone can completely warp themselves

[Anonymous No.10714664]

>>10714586
Wide in one photo, semi-normal in the other. She isn’t even consistent in her editing.

[Anonymous No.10714781]

>>10711731
>most people grow out of it by the time they're 30
Some people do, some people just escalate. Nightmare to be around.

[Anonymous No.10714965]

this thread is making me nauseous

[Anonymous No.10714968]

>>10714578
you can see where her natural lip line is lol, imagine what it looks like irl yikes

[Anonymous No.10714969]

>>10714968
Overdrawn lips always look awful IRL.

[Anonymous No.10714974]

>>10714968
Fat bitches love to make their other features bigger so it distracts you from how disgusting they are.

[Anonymous No.10716361]

>>10714969
What about losing a fight with a marker?

Gen z coming in here looking like clowns.
>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6Wl9P3bwgX0

[Anonymous No.10716392]

>>10716361
How is it any different than man's makeup?
Not a defense. Genuine question

[Anonymous No.10716396]

>>10716392
You seriously can't tell the difference? The girl is using the Michelle Phan sailor moon anime eye technique. Full white on bottom under her eye, marker eyeliner. It's ita as shit.

Mana's makeup is nothing like that garbage. There's more technique in what he has on his face than drawing eyeliner the size of your eyelids and then half way down your face. It's not even on level with gyaru makeup. It's bad tiktok gen z makeup.

[Anonymous No.10716416]

>>10705393
Stop basing your personality on a fashion trend. Go to therapy and take personal responsibility for your life instead of finding reasons to dislike and villify people in every community you encounter, cluster b-chan.

[Anonymous No.10719471]

>it’s another yasmine attention whore thread
heh….