/cgl/ - Cosplay & EGL

Nearly drowned at con. That was new.

i dont know where to look for a girlfriend, and i have so much love to give it sucks

>>10333461
OKCupid

>>10333461
>>10333464
Tinder, perhaps?

>make new FWB over tinder
>me bond over going to cons and stuff, planning to go the local con in a few months
>realize she'd actually be perfect gf material but she's in an open relationship and it seems pretty serious (they're planning on moving in together etc, they actually invited me to a threesome lol)
>kind of sucks that I caught feelings but I don't actually have any other con-going friends so I'm sticking it out in hopes she has a cool friend who's 1:1 to her personality or something
It's an annoying feel, I wish I could just make friends who share my interest, but I feel like the people who are really into cons either don't use tinder or are already spoken for en masse.

>>10333464
i have thought online dating felt so impersonal but okcupid doesnt seem so cancer as tinder. i just want to connect with someone. has anyone had luck with okcupid?
>>10333465
absolutely not.

>>10333499
Are you a guy or a girl?

>>10333516
im a guy

>>10333457
Hopefully in pussy anon!

>>10333499
>online dating felt so impersonal
it is. I get plenty of matches, but it never goes anywhere because trying to talk to a random stranger on the internet is extremely hard. Its hard to care about wanting to meet up with some rando.
okcupid is the best dating site though. cross platform and has plenty of search filters.

>>10333248
Started my period at the con and damn near shit myself in the dealer room. Good thing everyone's BO covered the smell.

>>10333525
Sorry but if you're average or below, no dating apps are going to work for you

>>10333534
weirdly wholesome lol

>>10333569
im average so i guess its just over for me already.
>>10333540
ill give okcupid a shot. i dont have any issues speaking with people and i think if im just open and honest with who i am and what i seek i should eventually find someone like-minded.

>>10333569
>>10333525
You may honestly do better meeting people irl than on a dating app. Dating apps are all visual. Try joining a local meetup group for one of your hobbies.

>>10333593
Oops the second quote as meant for >>10333588

>>10333588
As other anon said, meeting people in person will be better if your personality is the attractive part about you... dating apps are about looks first, no matter which one it is

>>10333534
I am a straight grill but thanks.

>>10333491
a commitment-phobe who has likely had dozens of dicks in her is "perfect gf material"? i can't imagine how desperate you are

>>10333248
My mom just saw my loli collection. She freaked out and says she's going to put me on TLC. Wtf do I do??

>>10333610
An hero

>>10333610
>loli
It's called lolita, retrad.

>>10333610
Kys

>>10333651
You know damn well that’s not what they meant

>>10333610
>>10333651
>>10333653
Sorry, I did mean lolita. Google has told me now why I shouldn't call it loli.

My mom saw my dresses and is accusing me of being an adult baby.

>>10333461
Search hashtags on instagram for a local con and start talking to people making posts about it. Even if you don't find a gf on there you'll make new connections that could help you meet new people in the future.

>>10333606
>assuming that poster was male in the first place
crossboarder get out

>>10333662
kek. neway ignore her it's not weird enough for tlc.

>>10333610
Huff computer duster to be sure you're entertaining

>>10333554
UH OH
STINKY

>>10333671
u mad, desperate scrote

>>10333710
>what is reading comprehension?
um no?

>people sharing black cosplayers because of the month in their IG stories
>feels like half of them refuse to wear wigs and just use their completely nappy ass natural hair without even styling it
Why the FUCK is this so prevalent among those faggots?

>>10333604
Nice

>be really proud of costume I made over the course of 5 months
>actually pay for a "real" photoshoot for once
>pare down proofs to a few shots I really like, tell photographer I don't need them touched up too much since I like them pretty well as-is
>send selected proofs and a small tip to photographer along with additional thanks

It has now been 5 months since the con. The photographer has posted photoshoots with heavy editing for multiple female cosplayers both from the same con as well as cons that happened 1 or 2 months after the con I had my shoot at. I've politely asked if there's an ETA twice, months apart, and was basically told "you're in the queue."

I'm pretty fuckin' pissed off right now. I get that nobody on Facebook or Instagram gives a shit about male cosplayers or their photos, but I paid his ass just like everyone else.

If he ever gets around to sending them to me and asks to be credited when I post them on my IG, I'm going to be 100% sure to say "photos taken and sat on for half a year after payment by @chucklefuck"

Honey cake is so damn overrated, its not even cute.

>>10333856
Agreed

>>10333759
Drop name pls.

My diet isnt going as great as it should and Ive got less than 2 weeks left.

Normally I can toughen up and get through this, but I'll be visiting a dear friend abroad for the con and touring her country which means I wont be able to eat as miniscule as I should.

feels bad.

>>10333856
I think it's cute but god damn am I already sick of seeing every ita and their mom wear it in totally uninspired ways thanks to that rerelease. It's turning into the new Holy Lantern.

>>10333869
It’s okay to take a break from or goneasy on your diet for special events, just be sure get back to it once you’re back.

>>10333662
>"My mom just saw my loli collection"
>mom believes coordinated fashion is for baby children

I see the autism runs very strong in the family.

>be me
>want cute short hair
>if I want long hair it’ll be easy to put in a wig!
>long wigs tangle easily :(
> want pretty long hair
>if I want short hair I can wear a wig!
>long hair is a bitch to wear under a short wig :(
Can I get an F in the chat

>>10333895
Use mane n tail on wig, they won't tangle.

>>10333897
True. I use horse shampoo on my pubes so they don't show in a leotard.

>Surprise $500 medical fees
Thankfully I have a decent job so I’m not in an actual bad situation, but there goes $500 I could have bought a new dress or two with.

It wasn’t even important. Just dumb labs this doctor made me do without checking to see if my insurance would cover it. Lesson learned. Make sure everything is covered beforehand and get a new doctor.

>Not sure if I want to blow money on animal crossing or going to AX

>>10334029
i picked animal crossing. easy choice

>>10334029
ax is temporary animal crossing is forever

>Young newbie lolita in comm
>Has reasonable troubles to afford new stuff
>Nonetheless treasures what she has
>Especially her favourite piece of jewelry
>Her endearment for the piece is widely known
>See the same piece in a different colour on LM
>Want to buy it for her so badly
>But what if I seem creepy?
>Off handedly asked about her birthday last meet
>It's soon
>But isn't that even more creepy?

Help, I want to support this legal child and would love to see her grow in the fashion, but how much is too much? 10-20$ is nothing to me, but quite the bit for her...

>>10334048
do it for under 20. Thats what I would spend on a normal birthday gift or a casual friend

>>10334063
Thanks Anon, when you put it like that it does seem reasonable.

>>10334048
Get her it and a card, and just tell her since her birthday was coming up, you wanted to get her a little something so she feels welcome in the comm. I think it's really sweet of you to do.

>>10334048
This is so sweet. I don't think you're being creepy just really nice. Nothing wrong or creepy about being thoughtful and kind anon. I'm sure she will appreciate the gesture.

>>10334048
Not creepy at all, really sweet actually. You could ask others in the comm if they'd like to join in by giving you a dollar for the jewelry, or signing a birthday card, so that the gift looks like its coming from more than just you if you're worried?

>>10333927
I use horse shampoo everywhere lol.

>>10333461
>male sexuality on /cgl/
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

>>10334046
Until your switch breaks and you lose your island because FUCK cloud saves

>>10334029
Animal crossing all the way.

>>10334198
>basedjak
murder the absolute living shit out of yourself

>>10334198
Wojack posters should be gassed

>>10333856
100% agree

>>10333878
i think overwhelmingly popular prints just get to a certain point where there is no new, inspiring way to coord them. holy lantern and sugary carnival for example.

>>10333975
Double check and make sure they’re not covered by your insurance before paying. I fought my insurance and doctor over a $300 bill for a year because the doc said it would be covered but my insurance used the wrong code. I won in the end and paid nothing.

>>10334229
why tf did it take that long?

>>10334269
Dealing with companies is a hassle. They need approval and processing time.

>Comm mom lets the Toga cosplayer conduct period inspection day
>Says she likes the blood but my period farts are putrid like burnt popcorn
>Why of all times did I have to be gassy?

I know you really don't want the male riffraff here, but I could think of no better place.
How can I have normal conversation with female humans at cons?
It seems like any time I try to talk with a girl I get no engagement, they probably think I am trying to flirt badly is my guess.
I'm not even doing this in a romantic context, I honestly have no idea how men end up in these horrible one sided friendships with women considering how difficult it is to be tolerated if you aren't desired.
How can I express that I am not trying to pick up chicks?

>>10334284
wear a fake wedding ring

>>10334289
this shit doesn't help. i know from experience some sleezy guys don't even care if you have a real fiance and meet them and stuff.

>>10334269
Doctor's office, insurance, and lab all were missing one another's messages. I basically had to wrangle a single person from the insurance company and go "I'm not paying for this shit, I made the doctor's office resubmit with a different code like it should've been in the first place, get it together," then stay on their asses daily for two weeks before they got it cleared, at which point I made them send me a copy of my account balance to show it was zeroed out for sure.

I switched insurances shortly after because the post-Obamacare "minimum viable product" companies blow and aren't worth the hassle for what little money you save. They know most people don't have the time or the will to take them to the mat like I did and will just pay what they shouldn't owe instead to make the bills stop.

>>10334289
I don't want to lie or anything. I want to make actual friends. I can talk to men just fine, (rather, I can talk to people just fine, but only men will try to carry a conversation) but women aren't having any of that.
I have never had a female friend in my life.
I figured that cons would be a great place to make friends considering it is relevant to my interests and seem like my type of people.

>>10333710
You were talking to a girl.

>>10334284
You want the truth? The thought process behind why you just referred to them as 'female humans' is exactly the same reason you can't seem to find any girls who want to hang out with them. It's not that you seem like you're trying to flirt badly, it's that you're unintentionally treating them in an alienated fashion.

I really wish I could explain better, but it's entirely the way you're coming off in conversation & body language which stems from how you classify women in your mind. Regardless, it starts with identifying why you just used the term 'female human', and changing that.

I'm not calling you a scrote, virgin, or anything like that. I'm just being dead honest, my friend.

>>10334305
want to hang out with you*

A lot of people with issues talking to women don't realize how every other thing they say sounds wildly bizarre & strange to other people. It shows the mindset that you think of them as lesser. Often times, people who use the word 'female' end up talking 'dumb' to women. That is, the way they speak to men and women is wildly different. Some women may seem dumb with bubbly voices and sometime vapid looks, but 'dumbing' down conversation will either insult them or make them think you're retarded. Another mistake many make is being overly cordial. You don't need to speak to women like you're their chauffeur. You likely don't even realize you're doing it.

>>10334305
I did mean that as a joke, as I had to brace for a potential "scrote" and all. I don't take it too seriously, just a little banter I suppose?
I actually typed that out before I went on to read the last part of your post in which you actually said it.

>>10334307
>Another mistake many make is being overly cordial. You don't need to speak to women like you're their chauffeur. You likely don't even realize you're doing it.
this seems more like it might be a legitimate problem for me. I suppose I do tend to talk to new people, especially women in an overly polite way. I definitely want to avoid anything that might be interpreted as flirtatious, but I don't really know how to act instead.

>>10334314
Nayrt, but just talk to them in a friendly, slightly distant manner, then pick up on how they talk to you and try to mirror that. If she's polite, you can be polite. Just let her make the first step and set the tone.
Also, as an aside, don't ask girls to do anything with you solo, always make it a "me and a few friends are doing this thing" until you two are good friends and have agreed that you're not into each other.

>>10334322
>then pick up on how they talk to you and try to mirror that
the problem is that they always move to disengage. They will respond politely if I ask questions, but never volunteer anything that can extend the conversation. I can read the signs pretty clearly, and I hope the only reason they feel uncomfortable is that they think I am hitting on them.
it can't help that I look kind of intimidating, but I can't really get shorter.

>>10334329
>if I ask questions
The important thing is: what kind of questions are you asking? If you’re making a conversation sound like a marriage interview, then yes, they’ll disengage. Do you have issues when talking one on one with guys?

>>10334284
>>10334329

Cons aren't great places to make friends, especially guys trying to befriend girls.

(a) you meet strangers for 3 days at most, more likely see them for five seconds and then your paths never cross again, so it's not encouraging to memorize names and faces of someone you might never see longer than two seconds.

(b) All the girls are now aware of guys crying "she led me on!" "I got friendzoned" etc. It's a minority of dramahoes who like getting caught up in that stupid shit, so as an extra extra polite measure, most girls will now move to disengage, shut down and cut you off before you get the impression you're being "lead on".

You're better off focusing on your hobbies outside of conventions. Join a gamer group or anime fanclub, pick something where the female fanbase is pretty huge (for eg, moeblob animes always seem to attract the dudes, yaoi is a bad idea for dudes to get into, but for some reason final fantasy and kingdom hearts always seem to have a lot of fangirls). Better still, the focus on your hobby will help shift focus on the game/anime rather than focus on how you're talking to the girl, which will help your awkwardness.


If you're talking about getting laid then your best bet (like anywhere else) is to go the night activities/raves, read their body language there and play it from there.

>>10334332
oh, usually really basic stuff that I genuinely want an answer to, like directions or some help with coursework. This is when they seem the most responsive to me, because for something like that it would be kind of rude not to answer.
Other than that, when I bring up casual conversation topics it doesn't go far.
I admit I am not that good talking to other men if they are strangers, but it usually goes better than that...
With my friends, or even new friends of friends, I am great at talking, and people seem to love my humor.
But it never seems to have time to shine unless the person who I am talking to wants to like me.

>>10334339
You're asking literal strangers for help with homework and wondering why no one wants to keep talking to you?

>>10334336
>Cons aren't great places to make friends, especially guys trying to befriend girls.
huh, really? I had heard that it was one of the better places, at least one of the more appealing options to me. I didn't like the idea of going to bars or other party environments like that.
Right now, cons seem like the best alternative to these clubs you are talking about that... don't really seem to exist in any way that is relevant to me. Sure, in some high schools, but I am in college and they don't really have anything like that.
I am not really concerned with having sex as of now, I should really be able to have good platonic interactions with women first

>>10334342
I'm talking about in class, when everybody is supposed to talk with each other while the professor is doing something else. Other guys will ask me questions.
in this environment when there is a straightforward reason to be talking about something objective, I get the most friendly responses. I think people in general like to feel helpful, and that they like to be friendly. It is more of an outlier that specifically girls who would have reason to believe I am trying to date them aren't so friendly.
I don't think I am undateably ugly, but I am a bit awkward in a way that can't improve without practice.

>>10334345

lolbro. Having friends =/= getting laid. Figure out which one you want.


Getting laid: your best bet is to look where the girls are also looking to get laid. Therefore, nightclubs and raves where they're horny and already looking to hook up is your best way to find a horny girl and signal back you want to hook up.

Alternatively, tinder and don't be picky.

For conventions, they have their share of cosplay raves and after parties much like nightclubs, only weebier.


Making friends: this means someone who is invested and cares about you emotionally. So it's better if you can find a setting where your friends will meet up repeatedly and continue to hang out with each other, hence a group with shared interest so you always have a topic you get together to talk about.

However, sleeping around in groups like these tend to create drama, so people tend not to. Plus, even if it's one-on-one, if you approach someone saying you want to be their friend, then turn around halfway and try to make them service your dick, you've already lied to them, they won't take that favorably, let alone bother sleeping with a liar.

Friends don't need to near you, you can join facebook or a subreddit. It'll even help with talking to girls as you won't know if they're a girl or not up front. That's assuming you're trying to make FRIENDS and not get laid.

For conventions, to make friends, what you do is exchange social media info so that the two of you can chat after the convention, that's how you make friends. But if they're already not talking to you what're you gonna do with that?

>>10334284
>>10334314
>I want FEMALE/FEMOID/WOMYN ONLY FRIENDS HOW DO I DO THIS
>*sees female*
>F-FRIEND?!!? N-NOW??! M-LADY??

youre a fucking creep dude.

>>10334363
The guy lacks basic social skills. Nothing we say can help him. He needs to go see a therapist for help.

>>10334362
>Having friends =/= getting laid. Figure out which one you want.
I just said, I wanted to have at least platonic female friend.
I can handle not having sex, but I can't be expected to go my whole life never knowing a single woman personally, only having a vague concept of women from pop culture.

>>10334363
the "females" part really was a joke, guys.
I just don't think it is healthy to go through my entire life only meaningfully interacting with men.
>>10334365
do you really think a therapist could help me? I would be willing to go, but I am not sure if being poor with social skills due to lack of experience is a medically treatable condition.

Gulls, how long do you plan to wear lolita?
Recently I've been overcome with such sadness, it feels like more stores are closing, more people leaving the fashion, etc. Mana-sama is no longer the youngest, even Misako is close to 40 already, one day our idols will be dead and no brands will exist anymore. People will judge you even harder the older you get, will you still have blogs, an instagram and online lolita friends when you're a granny? Yesterday I checked out the yt channel of kawaii pateen and views have dropped from a million to only a 1000 per video, it seems like nobody's interested in cute/japanese fashion anymore (maybe also thanks to kpop).
In conclusion, everything points to lolita slowly dying and that is making me fucking scared...

>>10334375
I don't care what anyone else does, I have a wardrobe that's hefty enough I can wear lolita and other kawaii fashion all I want and I plan to wear it probably until I die. I've worn this shit for most of my life and I don't see that changing any time soon. Fuck age, fuck expectations, I'm going to enjoy what I wear. End of story.

>>10334377
Cringe.

>>10334367
>do you really think a therapist could help me?
Nayrt, but a psychologist helps the mind without medicament. I don't know how it works in your country, but seeking a specialist is always a good choice. If you don't like it, you can change professionals to one that's more aligned with what you need.

>>10334375
Didn’t views on Kawaii Pateen start to drop because of the whole Cathy Cat saga?

>>10334375

Way ahead of you. I hit 40 already and my main brand is still AP. Only real changes, I slowed down my purchase since I already own a lot of stuff, and switched over from ameblog to twitter.

To be honest I always thought I'd sell everything and "graduate" lolita like everyone else did 5 years ago, but here I am still. Was never into youtube watching, GLB dying was a much blacker day for me but here we are, still.

My take, don't worry too much about it dying. It'll live as long as girls still love dressing up in it.

>>10334390
Did you ever swap out more childish cutesy prints for more mature ones? I'm worried about what I'll do with my toy prints when I'm older and if they'll look weird.

>>10334392

Hard to answer this, as toy prints were something I never really went in for, and anyway I think it's a mistake to focus too much on the print's theme.

Instead, I do still own a lot of pastel pony prints, the simple cuts are fairly easy to, how to say, de-pastel-ise? make less sugary? by adding Innocent World to the coord, either in darker tones or brown, and then changing up the styling: I use a simple updo rather than the head-eating bow they originally released with, and lean towards smaller handbags rather than themed ones, metal jewellery rather than AP's plastic. Swap the legwear out for lace tights, and I actually no longer own any tea party shoes. I think before you sell the dresses off, it's worth it to make a few collages and see if you can style it to suit yourself, don't just blindly assume it looks juvenile because of the print.

Having said that though, there's some dresses that just can't be toned down, Daydream Carnival in pastel with the chest bow was one where you just rolled with looking like a candy princess no matter what.

I have sold dresses that don't look good on me, if I haven't been able to pull a good coord out of a dress for a while, then it just isn't working out, and should go to someone else. Again it's not an easy thing to generalise. I sold Shadow Dream Carnival in white because the colour somehow made me look really haggard (and old), but kept the pink because it made me look radiant. That didn't have anything to do with the print at all.

>>10334375
I never got this mentality, you getting older isn't a reason to stop a hobby, if anything it's important to keep doing the things you love.


One day you'll die, we all will, so why should I stop wearing the clothes I like just because I'm old? I'ma die at 80 years old in a Baby dress

>>10334388
Yes, that and their blackface drama.

>>10334304
The femcels are trigger-happy around here.

>>10334453
Oh shit, I love Galko.

>>10334277
i was asking as someone who's dealt with this on the insurance end.

>>10334298
what a hassle. usually all it takes is ringing the drs office to verify and then they change the code.

>>10334453
Cgl isn't the best place to talk about your sexual degeneracy desu.

>>10334041
>>10334046
>>10334216

It is decided.

>>10333671
This only applies to other threads. Everyone knows feels threads are containment threads swarming with desperate men

I've literally wanted to say something about this topic for months but
Idiots wearing ahego clothing to cons capture the true essence of cringey nostalgic weebs like back in the 2008-2015 and I think its hilarious that the people who shit on those kids were
A. Super into the ahego hype at first or
B. Same type of people that when they were kids had yaoi paddles, glomped people, did the whole free hugs thing or some other cringey socially awkward thing like wearing the virgin killer dress, kitty lingerie, boob window shirt, etc

Like sure ahego clothing is inappropriate outside of cons but the kids wearing it are just being what most of us were at that age,
Annoying, unaware of their surroundings, weebs and not really much else. I enjoy the nostalgia that comes from looking at someone be so fucking stupid with their "im going to rep something I love" and I enjoy telling my friends, all who think ahego is super bad, to fuck off because I know the shit they did a few years ago in public just as "bad"

>>10334375
KP's views dropped because they suck.

>>10334472
ahegao isn't looked down on because it's cringy, it's because it's fucking porn. those weeb clothes you mentioned didn't even exist at the same time as glomping and yaoi paddles. comparing underage high schoolers wearing shirt with porn caps on them to caramelldansen is embarrassing.

>>10334477
>triple dubs
these are the triple dubs of truth.

>>10333593
Or you could just give up meeting interesting single people who would be interested in you is pretty much impossible.

>>10334472
They're doing it because they think it's edgy and funny, they're not repping something they love. If they do love it, it's a bunch of stolen art from mostly non-con hentai doujins with underage looking characters so what does that say exactly?

>>10334480
porn in public IS cringy tho

>>10334472
They just think it's edgy because it's porn. Nothing deep about it.

>don't enjoy anime as much anymore
>don't enjoy videogames as much anymore
>don't enjoy going to cons as much anymore
>feel more alive when I'm at work, drinking with co-workers/friends, or working on a cosplay project
>Have sleepless nights occasionally about work because my job involves digital and social marketing
>Basically have dreams where I post something wrong so I wake up and have to check my company's accounts to make sure I didn't actually post something like "Fuck you" to a troll on twitter
>only reason I feel like I still do cosplays is because I like working with my hands and I know I'll get likes and attention for it
>still live with mom at 25 and even though I help out with bills and stuff I feel like I'm a failure for not having moved out yet
>accepted I'll probably die of a stress induced heart attack at an early age even though I eat well and exercise 5-6 times a week

At the risk of sounding like an attention whore I'm not looking for sympathy. I just needed to get this out somewhere and I didn't want to bother friends with this.

My therapist forgot about my appointment and so I have to wait another week now. I am so upset and hurt.

>>10334366
Nayrt, but jesus fucking christ dude

>>10334506
That is rather incompetent of your therapist. I hope you at least got an apology?

>>10334366
how have you not known women platonically? Do you have hobbies that involve other people? Do you have classes? do you go to club events?

I hate to break it to you, but college is the easiest place in the world to make friends. If you're socially stunted in college you're fucked when you get out. There are a million things to do to meet people on campus, break out of your shell and just fucking do them jesus

Can someone tell me how the Jojo fanbase got so fucking bad? Did it just suddenly get an influx of edgy teenagers and adult spergs?
Jojo cosplayers in person are usually chill from what I've experienced, but online jojo fans are so fucking batshit.

>>10334366
The thing is that you’re placing the condition ‘female’ at the top of your search. Which is the best way to get girls to avoid you because they don’t want to be treated like fucking zoo animals. Imagine if someone started to talk to you because you were a guy and not because of your own interests. Every time you try to have a discussion about your shared hobby of anime or whatever, they’re like “oh you like slice of life? That’s so cute anon, what other things do males like?”.

>>10334515
She did apologize and was genuine about it. She was on vacation the past three weeks and had forgotten to write down the appointment into her calendar. Her office is a separate building attached to her home so she saw me waiting to get into the office as she was heading out to meet a friend for lunch.

I am trying to not be hurt but I've been needing to work through things and being on hold an extra week is not good when I have had more suicidal thoughts lately..

>>10334504
Whenever I find myself enjoying stuff less like anime or videogames, I just take a break from them, don't pressure myself to participate in them, and then rejoin when something genuinely piques my interest. I've stopped caring about being able to recognize flavour of the month stuff, and if I miss out on a game during the hype and play it a year or two later, who cares. Just spend time doing what actually makes you happy, anon, and maybe you'll come back to those things at a later date when they do seem appealing.

>>10334515
Lol if I were to miss my appointment as a client I would owe them 200 dollars something tells me this doesn’t work the same way.

>>10334526
I'm going to a community college right now to save some money before I transfer to univeristy
I have been hoping that it would be better there, but so far going to cons or meetups hasn't been helpful for talking to women.
anyway, I don't think I am socially stunted from a general sense, it is just that all my friends have been male.
>>10334531
that sounds like it would be nice actually. At least preferable to no woman wanting to talk to me.
The point is that I already have male friends, they are nice and all but they tend to be like me- that is to say, that they are also incapable of talking to women. I want to grow as a person here, I feel like I am missing a major part of human society.

>>10334559
Just based on your replies, I can already tell you will never change. Rather than making the most of what you have at your disposal right now, you tell yourself that this isn’t the right environment and surely you’ll get your act together when you transfer to a real university. Spoiler: You won’t. You’re so socially stunted that you don’t even realize you’re socially stunted. You hang out with people as pathetic as yourself and that’s a nice comfort zone to be in I’m sure, but you will never leave it.

>>10334557
It doesn't, but she's paid the copay for me before when she has canceled so she might do the same again. She knows that I give up other things to afford therapy and is usually quite sympathetic and understanding.

>>10334559
>already have male friends, they are nice and all but they tend to be like me
meanwhile, women are an alien species? we are humans much like yourself. The way you think we're an enigma to be researched is offputting.

>>10333464
OKCupid went to shit almost immediately after Tinder became famous. It hasn't been the same since. They pretty much only pander to LGBTQ and "non-traditional" aka racemixing, poly, etc. now, which is fine if that's your thing but their site population and overall quality of people is also less than 10% of what it was back before swipe right culture took root.

>>10334564
>Rather than making the most of what you have at your disposal right now, you tell yourself that this isn’t the right environment and surely you’ll get your act together when you transfer to a real university.
I realized this as a problem, that has to count for something, right? That's why I went out of my comfort zone and started going to cons and meetups once I was able to navigate through the world without assistance.
but the thing is it just doesn't go well talking to women, and I wish that wasn't the case.
>>10334572
that's the thing, I honestly expected it wouldn't be any harder than being friends with men. what with those nice guy memes I was talking about, I thought it was easy for even a total loser to make platonic female friends.
I am just trying to grow as a person, surely you would at least feel a little bummed if you went an entire life without talking to a man as your friend?

>>10334574
>racemixing
Please go back to pol

>>10334528
It's because it's easy to meme. Especially with the anime. A lot of things in Jojo, in or out of context, are either weird or hilarious (pic related). Couple that with the reception and quality of the anime you're going to get a lot of teenage memers.

Seeing as we are bitching about that feel when no gf I’ll bitch too.

I mostly just don’t understand how the fuck they are suppose to work. I get out I go to shows I have hobbies but I never meet anyone interesting who is also interested or single or whatever. Even if they were I would know how to pursue anything. Like not being in a relationship isn’t the worst it just gets lonely and I worry I’m getting to old to have never been in one. I don’t know it’s weird to me.

>>10334581
>its weird to (you)
well there you have it.

>>10334575
How have you gone your whole life without knowing a girl? Childhood, middle school, high school, and now college? It clearly is something you've had an issue with forever, and the way you treat women as "other" is probably something you've always done, and women can see it coming from a mile away. You need to take a step back and work on how you view women.

>>10333869
SS + IF/OMAD
eat an hour before you lift and fast the rest of the day. Don't lift for longer than 45 minutes. Avoid splurging on carbs, eat 60% fats (animal/nut/dairy), 30% proton (animal/beans/nut/yogurt/dairy) and 10% carbs (vege's ONLY, no berries or fruits, they're pure sugar).
We're all gonna make it brah

>>10334617
>30% proton
how do you separate them from the electrons though

my sister's dad just died of a drug overdose and I feel weird because she kinda wrote him off because of his drug problem and now she has to take care of everything because he had no one in his life. I want to be there for her but I barely knew the guy and that seems sad to me, that the majority of people showing up at your funeral will probably be people who barely knew you who are only there to support the one thing in your life that ended up working out (his daughter)

>>10334574

as much as I love working artist alley, I'm dreading working with other artists again after getting somewhat backhanded compliments about how I'm 'so good at being two-faced', ie. friendly and bubbly with customers, and yet more subdued when I'm off duty.

I can largely ignore it and stick with just my AA/con friends, but it still grates a little.

>>10333534
unexpected wholesome

>>10333759
I can understand if you want to stay anonymous, but dropping a name so we could avoid that photographer would be cool.

>>10334674
Oh boo, fuck whoever said that. That's customer service 101. There are hundreds of memes about this. You get a lot of autism with artists, so that explains why they think it's appropriate to be their usually droll selves when dealing with customers and thinking what you're doing is two faced.

>>10334430
Whoa, what? Care to explain that?

>>10334724
One of the models did a “nicki Minaj” makeup tutorial and did blackface for it, darkening her skin a ton and making her features “like nickis”

>>10334726
Ooh yikes. Glad that I never watched their shit in the first place

>>10334724
are you seriously shocked that japanese people are racist
that's not something new

>>10334581
Why is it always comparing about tfw no gf? If there was even half as many lonely women this would disappear overnight.
I hate that literally every place there could be a woman looking for a relationship there are 2 men for every woman.
The radical feminists were right, we should use abortion to keep the male population below the female population.

>>10334575
Surely you've talked to girls online as a starting point?

>>10334336
I actually second this. I find myself avoiding a lot of friendships with guys now because of fear they'll feel led on. It happened with two friends in the past, and afterward I stopped being friends with dudes altogether outside a few who have girlfriends.

>>10334339
It sounds like you got anxiety, dude. Yeah, you'd need a therapist. I have medicine to take when my anxiety gets too bad otherwise I tend to avoid social interaction if I don't have my script filled.

Talking to women likely makes it that much worse, but you got problems speaking to men too. That's anxiety, dude.

>>10334362
Never listen to people like this because I promise copious amounts of either drugs or alcohol is this man's secret, and you don't want those... secrets.

>>10334581
99% of the time when a man complains about "never" meeting a girl who is interested, it's because he's going for girls out of his league. you most likely think you are too good for fat or ugly girls and go for pretty ones.

>>10334472
I thin ahego clothing on its own looks like shit, but any man or woman in head-to-toe ahego attire has my respect.

>>10334778
...the male population IS below the female population almost everywhere. barring china and india.

>>10334801
think*

>>10334575
>nice guy memes
Your brain is riddled with poison. No. You'll find masses of 'beta orbiters' only exist online & in diatribes involving women some man has known since childhood. A childhood friend who likely thought of the other as a brother. In real life, men don't do that shit, and you don't take that shit when offered unless you're giving something in return. If a man offers you dinner, drinks, a ride home, or whatever say you, one knows damn well they're expected to give something back. Most also know that not doing so will endanger one's safety. The ones who will take that shit do so to everyone regardless of social status or looks. To put it simply, they're wringing 'Chad' for their money just as much as some 'nice guy' often with nothing in return. Don't you know what 'entertaining a fuck boy like I care' means? This is the way the world actually works.

Act natural. By that, you might say, "Aye, but I feel how I act around men might put women off." So? Act natural. You'll fare a hell of a lot better acting like yourself then trying to stress over who you do and don't talk to. It might not help much, but at the very least you won't come off like a constipated white knight.

>>10334616
I really have tried. I don't know what could have cause it to start so early. I do have a sister who I get along well with, so I don't think I am incapable of interacting with women in a normal way, it is just the beginnings of conversation, and meeting new people.
Do you have any suggestions, something I can realistically do in the near future?
Do you think that going to cons and meetups to talk was a step in the right direction, or just making it worse?

>>10334798

I know that now. So much regret typing up large paragraphs. Now I know why the rest of 4chan just calls them scrotes and tells them to go away.

>>10334472

>Annoying, unaware of their surroundings, weebs
> someone be so fucking stupid
>enjoy telling my friends... to fuck off

I can't even tell if this is bait... you're describing exactly why ahegao wearers would be looked down on. Who wants to hang around a bunch of dumbfuck teens being annoying and unaware?

Besides, it's 2020 and we already acknowledge yaoi paddles are evil. If the same people didn't grow out of their behaviour then who wants to hang around literal retarded humans?

This post is so cringe I'd rather believe it's a troll post written to get people responses.

>>10334377
Ily anon. I hope I feel the same way when I'm older but I've already moved from sweet to classic.

>>10334504
Get laid

>>10334647
That's not even a /pol/ post. That dude is 100% right. I was on OKC for over a decade and the moment Tinder hit, it went downhill.

Politics aside, it suddenly shifted focus away from things like fun quizzes and well-developed, wordy profiles and pushed users to basically hammer out 20-30 matchmaker questions that are often very politically-charged, which is great for people who have no personality other than what DNC/GOP leadership assigns them, but for anyone trying to feel out a potential partner's personality it does shit fuck all. Most people barely even bother filling out profiles anymore, and QuickMatch became a shittier version of Tinder. The mobile app likewise because a slightly-more-feature-rich Tinder, rather than being a mobile version of the site.

I'm not going to pretend it's not still useful - I've been dating a girl for 8 months or so that I met there - but OKC has absolutely transformed from an excellent, feature-rich free dating site that encouraged people to write about themselves and gave users things to talk about (i.e. the quizzes) into Tinder minus users.

I got super lucky; my current girlfriend was ready to dump the site after a week of barely using it because it just sucks ass now.

>>10334891
edit: I missed the "racemixing" part; that's very much stupid /pol/ shit, but the general thrust of "OKC sucks shit now" is still on point

>>10334800
can you post an image of the type of girl an average looking socially awkward man should go for?

>>10334785
I have. It was nice actually, although that sort of thing is kind of difficult in a one-on-one setting as opposed to an open discussion like this. I felt a little empathetic to some problems she was facing, and I offered some support. I am not quite sure why she accepted an offer from an anonymous man, but talked to each other for a while. These opportunities are few and far between, but I think it was good for me.

>>10334797
really? I feel like everything would have been fine had they wanted to talk just like I did.
I really do feel much better talking to people in environments like that.
>>10334809
I have been learned not to believe memes on the internet. I suppose I am glad that the claims of women leading men on are exaggerated, but disappointed that it is somewhat difficult to befriend women in light of these realities.

I think I was acting natural at the absolute least, it's just difficult to show off my best side to people who are apprehensive to further the conversation.

>>10334836
>sister
Ask her for help. She knows you, she’s probably observed you in situations where you’ve tried to talk to women - if not, go do some activity together so she can. She’ll be able to tell you what you’re doing wrong, and the fact that she’s there and already hanging out with you lowers your “potential creep” score.

>>10334896
NAYRT but google what average british women look like. Bottom left is too pretty for you unless you improve your social skills, the rest should be attainable

>>10334908
she has helped me more than anyone, telling me not to wear denim shorts in middle school, not that it has amounted to much.
she seemed apprehensive at first when I came to her for advice on how to "avoid being the least desirable type of man to interact with", and she just sort of give me "just be yourself" tier advice. I tried to press for more help by asking about the men who have tried to talk to her who she just did not want to engage with. I wanted to avoid being like them. I could tell she felt bad for me, that I would be lumped into this group despite her knowing I wasn't like that.
The best advice she was able to give was to shave, as having a full beard wasn't helping the very basic goal of seeming like I wasn't a threat.
other than that, she told me to try online dating- that didn't go very well, mostly because I was disheartened by how shallow and overly sexual it is.
She lives kind of far from me now, and she has her own life, I don't think I would have the opportunity for her to go somewhere for that with me.

>>10334938
3 of them, including the one you mentioned seem middle age. I'm a college student

>>10334942
wow, that's a real wall of text, didn't mean for that.
I suppose I am just not used to people really engaging my problems like this, so I thank you.

>>10334938
Bottom two are fine top two aren’t my type. I’m bi I should just switch to men lol but I don’t really trust men much. I’ll prob have some surgery done at some point to hopefully look less like ass.

>>10334896
an ugly or fat girl. an average girl can do better than you.

>>10334900
That's a good starting point. If she was your friend then you could have asked her for some more advice too.

>>10335158
In other words give up.

>>10334730
I do know that, doesn’t make it okay though. I’m not fucking stupid.

>old dress looks faded in photos
>buy anyway because cheap and want
>arrives
>it was just the flash that made it look faded and its actually as vibrant and colorful as the day it released

>>10335158
what do you think a man who can date an average girl is like?

>separated from fiancée recently
>had to move out, having trouble finding a new job
>cosplay isn’t as interesting to me anymore despite being one of my main hobbies for 4 years
>all my hobbies just feel dull and repetitive, desu
>pushing away all friends because i feel anxious and uncomfortable
>have lots of con plans in the future, but desu all i want to do is get hammered and do stupid shit because of how bad i feel

this is my first time on /cgl/ and i think this is the right place to post smth like this. what do y’all say?

>never sewn a full from scratch item before
>pick up my sewing machine for the first time in a year
>haggle with it for hours, finally get it to work
>shit out a messy vest mockup out of muslin
>not clean at all
>mfw still ecstatic at the fact i created something

I'm using old clothes as a base, so I'm not using actual patterns. Is there any way I can get everything looking relatively even and nice?

>>10335270
take the clothes apart and then draft a pattern by tracing, then use that pattern to draft something that's more uniform. you'll want to measure and the graph pattern paper!

>>10335272
Part of me is worried if I try taking the clothes apart I won't be able to put them back together or know where everything goes. I'm kinda stupid and theres a lot of different seams on the shirt...

I started poking around some random commenters' profiles on COF and dear god you guys weren't kidding about the group being full of sissies and autogynephiles.

>>10335290
>autogynephiles
I don’t trust the judgement of someone who uses this term lol

>>10335290
Honestly fuck sissies, but only figuratively

>>10335299
People like you is why sissies are finding acceptance in the lolita movement. fuck you handmaiden.

>>10335238
You seem depressed. I don't think it's depression the actual condition, but it's like a temporary debuff if that makes sense. I went through something like this when one of my best friends passed away. Take your time and be sad the way you want to- don't bottle yourself up or force yourself to cheer up (unless that's what works for you). One day, you will wake up and realize it is what it is and that's okay and you'll be okay, and you'll be happy again.

I mean, I’m clinically depressed. It’s just been exasterbated by everything thats happened. I’ve never had an episode this long (4 months now) and it’s... lowkey worrying to me. But thank you for the advice <3

>>10335316
To reply to a post click the post number.

>>10335237
a man who is above average in facial features. it's well known that women date up, even if it's just a little.

>>10335238
serious question, why does anyone move in together BEFORE getting married? that just seems like a really dumb idea

also yeah you sound very depressed, see a doctor

>>10335237
Nothing to do with looks. All to do with social skills and fashion sense.

>>10335333
long distance relationship, we wanted to live together for a bit before tying the knot finally. I guess it just wasn’t meant to be, I don’t want to go into it. Guess it’s best that we didn’t get married before living together because we ended up ultimately splitting :c

And I wish it were that easy. No psychiatrist accepts my health insurance where I live. Thank you for the advice

>>10335336
look up NAMI and see if they offer free services in your area

>>10335334
is the lie that incels tell themselves. nope, women care a lot about looks too. sorry.

>>10335329
why is this? won't this lead to many women who cannot find dates? why does it seem that so many men are the ones who cannot date then.

>>10335309
Idk I find that anyone who uses the term is a weird all men are evil rad fem or some pol weirdo.

I don’t like weirdo pervy creeps I just don’t use weird sudoscience to describe them.

>>10335343
They do actually, and they have a building too!! Thank you so much. I contacted my health insurance and had been calling so many independent practices but it felt like it led nowhere. Even this small development made me feel a bit better, and I’m def gonna contact them in the morning. thank you :’c

Do you have any more advice?

>>10335349
women date up in either looks OR money. a lot of men are average/ugly AND poor, so that's why you see it.

>>10335333
What? It's the complete opposite. You want to make sure you are compatible in a small space before you agree to doing it for the rest of your life.

>>10335352
I don't really have any wealth of my own, but thanks to my family I will never worry about money. Is this actually going to be significant to a woman who is living off of loans?
who is an average looking guy, as a college student, going to get a an average looking girlfriend?
keep in mind average here is a pretty big range, it captures a significant portion of the college population.

>>10335364
because then if you break up, it's a huge ass hassle to move and decide who gets what etc. whereas divorce is a much more serious and lengthy process than a simple break up, so people are more likely to work hard on any problems rather than just leave. idk, i'd never risk that messiness

>>10335365
you won't. sorry. again, if you're REALLY just wanting any female companionship, then settle for the ugly or fat girls. or stay alone and don't complain anymore. that's how the world works

Meta's Basics line is so gorgeous, and I can technically afford it just fine, but I'm too responsible. No $300 dress for me, just another $50 skirt from WW and I'll shut up and like it. Maybe one day I'll have enough fuck-you money to shop this line.

>>10335367
>huge ass hassle to move and decide who gets what
You think divorce isn’t like this too?? If anything, it’s more stressful when lawyers are involved.

>>10335376
of course it is, but my point is most people don't decide to get divorced at the drop of a hat like they do with breakups. they are more willing to stick it out and work through problems because of how heavy and complicated divorce is vs a breakup

>>10335372

Oh why, that's nice

>>10335349
Women just don't bitch about in men-dominated spaces when they're too fat/ugly/creepy to get a date

>>10335372
Link? Never heard of this before

>>10335367
>>10335378
Moving out is less of a hassle than learning you hate living with someone and wishing you'd never married them.

>>10335329
>>10335349
I’m dating an ugly man who makes about a fourth of what I do because he’s kind and hard working. THAT’s the thing that’s hard to find, true kindness and patience. You incels have no idea what you’re talking about. If you think people aren’t dating you because you don’t have money or good looks, you couldn’t be more wrong. They’re not dating you because you’re bitter, entitled, think poorly of women, and you see them as something you deserve, instead of seeing a relationship and love as blessing that anyone would be fortunate to have and needs to earn by being the best versions of themselves they can be (I mean your character and inner worth, not externals). Most women I know date “down” as you would call it, because we judge worth based on the things that matter and that has nothing to do with what you look like or how much money you make.
> t. a hot fucking catch of woman who waited around for her diamond in the rough

>>10335350
Hi I'm the original anon. I'm not radfem, I don't hate men. I quite like a lot of men. I don't think all trans people are creeps. Autogynophilia is just a convenient descriptive term. What term would you use for "guy who gets turned on by imagining himself as a woman"? It's a pretty common fetish, so it's useful to have a short name for it.

>>10335408
nayrt but I just classify them as sissies, too. They're usually all getting off to vaguely the same idea, some of them are just more open about how they think it's shameful to be a woman.

I am a complete fucking mess right now. I have been busting my ass on this cosplay for the last 3+ months and I entered incorrectly somehow and apparently group signups are full and I guess I'm fucked now, even though I submitted the app 20 mins after signups opened.
I fucking hate myself. Work PTO for one of the group members is set at the beginning of the year and I have potentially ruined everything. Even the backup contest is full now so we're all just monsterfucked unless a group spot opens up.

I've never fucked myself so bad before. I'm glad my group members aren't assholes and we actually like each other or this would be a next level friend disaster. I dont even wanna keep working on the cosplay til I find out what's going on, its causing me so much distress.

>>10335423
I think sissies have more of a humiliation angle to the gratification rather than just misdirected heterosexuality. But this is getting OT.

>>10335408
>It's a pretty common fetish, so it's useful to have a short name for it.
You'd be amazed at how many people want to deny it exists and also want to erase it.

I used to only tell people who were really close to me and actively pried at wanting info on my sex life because I was/am so ashamed of having that fetish. Without fail they all either immediately wanted to convince me I was trans or acted like my existence as a non-trans AGP threatened the the validity of entire transgender movement. People react to hearing about it like you just told them you're a pedo. It's insane. I don't tell anyone about it anymore, not even my partners.

I'm not at all surprised the more shameless ones have infested lolita spaces. I doubt it's a case of "we didn't know this was creepy" and more that they don't care who winds up as collateral damage to their fetish fulfillment. Kinda think at least a few of the "drag queen story hour" activists are basically doing the same thing desu.

>>10334887
Oh so that's why I'm so stressed out, miserable, and constantly thinking about past sexual abuse. I'm just sexually frustrated.

>>10335368
Are you a girl or a male incel? Do you have some kind of agenda here?
obviously you know there are exceptions but why do you think it is generally the case that an average man can not date an average woman?
there are significantly more average looking early 20's men than there are ugly or fat early 20's women.
There are just so many average looking women in university.

I managed to gain some weight and reached my goal of 60kg so I guess i'm happy about that.
65 would be my ideal but eating on a fixed schedule is so exhausting for me.

>>10335406
>seeing a relationship and love as blessing that anyone would be fortunate to have and needs to earn by being the best versions of themselves they can be (I mean your character and inner worth, not externals).
That really sounds wonderful, and I hope I can experience it
I wish I could show my emotion and comfort to others more easily.
I think that when it could truly shine is after dating, which would be a bit too late. It would be nice if there was a form of pre-dating where I could actually get to know women without attaching it to the idea of a potential romantic relationship.

>>10335476
>It would be nice if there was a form of pre-dating where I could actually get to know women without attaching it to the idea of a potential romantic relationship.
So like... friendship?

>put in a big ($500+) order on WW a few days ago consisting mostly of items I'm not too keen on simply because I need more items in that color asap and they were the only items available in that color
>check WW for funsies today
>they added tons of items I actually like in that color
Kill me now

>>10335478
I guess that is the ideal, as I had been posting about in this thread.
Although I don't think it has to be a precursor to a relationship. I just want to be able to have some personal connection in my life.
I hope that having regular platonic relationships with women will help me show this part of myself, and develop as a person, so that I could eventually have a relationship, but that is optional.

>>10335489
I’ve read all your posts in this thread, and to me you just sound autistic. Maybe you could try a social coach or something

anyone else witnessed the bloodbath just now with dirt cheap AP bracelets and rings on LM flying by

legit in awe of the speed with which they popped up and got instant purchased, damn good feels for those buyers but also why the hell can't I be that lucky?!

In my wee days of just admiring lolita I talked about it a lot with a friend of my. That friend knew way more, owned a couple of dresses and encouraged me greatly. It was thanks to her that I got to try on a petticoat which made me set my heart on getting frills for myself.

Sadly, shortly after, that friend had a lot of issues and we drifted apart. She physically moved to another city and got busy with other things in life. Now, years later, we reunited at a convention and I finally got a chance to give her my lolita Instagram. I felt so proud to show someone I thought of as a mentor how far I had come on my own.

But now whenever she comments on my post I get a weird taste in my mouth. She doesn't wear lolita any more, and her comments come off... Odd? She doesn't seem half as knowledgeable now as she was back then. Technically I feel as I shouldn't complain as it's nice to get comments and interact with a friend but ... It's a feels thread, and I am feeling a complicated feel.

>>10335610
I feel bad for the seller, even if she listed at 3-4x the price they'd still sell fast

>>10335636
I only got a quick look at 2 of her listings and I think she's in need of quick cash or sth cause she states that she can't do holds or such at this moment. Sad feels for her indeed

I still wish I could have snagged something though, but even with constant refreshing I only managed to even click on/open 2 of the listings and they were bought before I could put through my bid. The rest all seemed to instantly go to sold! Curse my slow internet

I think I'm finally going to start wearing lolita. I hate the term "lolita at heart" but I think that's closest to what I am. I've been posting here for years and lurk auction sites to help anons in the dream dress thread but never bought myself anything because i don't think it would suit me, but fuck it. I love lolita and even if I look stupid in it at least I'll be able to wear frills around my house

Its not something you would expect from 4chan, so I always forget that /cgl/ is a majority female userbase.
I only come her occasionally to live vicariously through people that go to cons, since I never have.

>>10335706
Begone scrote

I've spent $1370 on shit today and it's not even 3 yet

>>10335668
You go anon!

>>10335527
Does this contradict with believing I have some inner worth that women would like if they got to know me?
I really don't think that I am thinking poorly of women, or seeing them as something I deserve.
I think I am socially well adjusted when talking to people I already know.
what makes you think I sound autistic? Do you think I can recover to have a good social life?

>>10335817
What you get bb? I haven't bought anything since the VM Harvest Gauze OP set in purple and ivory

I placed a custom order from a Taobao reseller shop back in November. It said approximately a month to sew and I chose quick 4 day shipping. I’ve been getting zero updates about my order for months now and have been back and forth emailing with the support. They said it will ship out in February and I’m already kind of annoyed and email them asking once again. They reply that everything is shut down because of the corona virus and apologizing. I instantly feel like a huge fucking asshole.

>>10335610
what were they? I missed it

>>10335406
this is a great incel fairytale. just be NICE, uggoes, and you'll totally get a hottie!

>>10335879
You really are an ignorant asshole. Were you living under a rock or what?

>>10335273
nayrt, but start with something simple without a whole lot of seams...like maybe a t-shirt? You'll get better with practice.

>>10335273
try this with a shirt you don't care about (so if it can't be put back together it's not much of a loss) or start with something even simpler, a curtain. They're just straight lines, pretty hard to fuck up.

>>10335372
>those pintucks
i'm in love

>>10335873
Diff anon here, but as a slightly autistic girl, the best way I can put it into words is how analytical and overly-explanatory all your posts are coming off as, and that gets very old to listen to in a social context. I am not meaning to be critical of you, but I get told the same. I also have a short tolerance of it in others.

Try not to think about all of this so much. Just go into all your interactions with passion about what you like (You're going to cons because of that, right?). If you end up clicking with someone then it ought to come naturally, but if you come off as just breaking down all the whys and hows of everything you talk about, it gets tiring.

I can't count how many people I avoid simply because the way they talk about shit is like... really boring. They're good people, I like them, but I get so bored sometimes. Maybe that's what's happening for you with girls.

>>10335329
women don't date up, you're just boring and ugly

>>10335896
nayrt but it was Shy Bear, Dream Ribbon, Dreamy Bunny, Decoration Pony and more! A whole range of bracelets, bangles and rings. Pretty much 2 search pages full of listings all completed in less than 5 seconds, it was intense!

I managed to get a Shy Bear bangle and bracelet myself

today I learnt how to pluck my eyebrows

>>10336000
Thank you for your input, I have been working on being more casual in conversations with new people and I think that would be a good place to start. I am sociable around my friend group and family, I am even well liked when I am able to show off my humor and kindness to others.
But it is particularly hard when I am starting a conversation, as the person I am talking to does not yet want to be in a conversation with me, if that makes sense?
obviously, this would be so much easier if I had some girl who came up to me and said "I want to be your friend. Impress me"
Based on the reactions I get, it feels like I am asking them for a favor just to spend time with me, all though I suppose this is due to (false) undertones that it is an attempt at getting a date.

>>10336089
>am asking them for a favor just to spend time with me
I mean, you are if there’s no joy in spending time with you. If it feels that way, then maybe you aren’t as compelling as you think. From your words so far, you sound pretty insufferable. Work on talking less and listening more, maybe.

Can we please stop centering this entire thread around giving some autistic misogynist waste of breath advice? It's not related to cgl at all. Plus he's probably jerking it to all that "femoid" attention.

>>10336092
>I mean, you are if there’s no joy in spending time with you.
I agree with that, but my goal I want to change this impression. Once I am already friends with somebody, they LIKE being with me. If only I could show that on first meeting someone.

>maybe you aren’t as compelling as you think.
I guess I want to believe that the only reason that they wouldn't want to have me as a new friend is because they don't want to encourage men to hit on them. Don't be so cruel, I do not try to sound insufferable, but with a lack of opportunity this sort of thing is hard to work on.

>Work on talking less and listening more, maybe.
I want to listen, I really, really do. To listen, I need the person I want to be friends with to open up to me in some way

>>10336113
you really think I am so low?
why do you think I am a misogynist when I want to have female friends?

>>10336092
the amount of salt in this post, trying to make someone else feel bad huh? your life must be very nice. Piece of shit, kys, make the world a better place.

>>10336154
There is nothing wrong with letting incels know their place.

>>10336155
your seething shows that you're fucked up in the head, needing to bring others down only shows that you're down yourself, you just wanna pull them down to your level

>>10336156
Begone, scrote.

>>10336116
>Don't be so cruel
That anon is the least cruel person in your life right now. They just told you what apparently no one else has ever bothered to say. If only you'd listen.

>>10335350
>pseudoscience
Trans medicine isn't exactly what I'd call accepted medical practice either anon. The whole field is throwing itself forward through sheer social force, rather than the result of medical research.

>>10336231
nuh uh, plus you know in your heart I'm right

>>10336124
Anon, you're the same anon who used the term 'human females', and misogyny is reflected again in your post, >>10336089, where you say it's easier if a girl said, "I want to be your friend. Impress me."
>I want to be your friend. Impress me.
If you don't realize how fucked that sounded, again, this is exactly your issue.

>>10336089
Also...
>As the person I am talking to does not yet want to be in a conversation with me.
You're trying to talk to people in awkward situations in which nothing warrants you talking to them, yeah.

>ex was my con and cosplay partner
>cosplay was my favorite hobby and now i can't seem to enjoy it without him
>can't find anything that makes me feel happy, even anime
>i still can't get over him half a year later

I want to die

>>10336333
it took me a decade to get over a really hurtful event, so just don't be me, do your best to love yourself and take care of yourself and know it does come with time. but don't drag it on either. there comes a point where you have to actively kick your own butt to do better. It's best if you do that asap. I know it's hard, but you can do it anon. please do better than I did. I regret the time I was stagnant and let myself ignore the things I should have done and it hurts way more than the loss of the person.

>>10336319
Obviously not or I wouldn't be happy to shut down incels constantly.

>>10336343
>implying you are ever happy
>implying your life isn't misserable
else u wouldn't be acting like this

>>10335628
What is she saying that comes off as someone lacking knowledge? Is she giving you bad crit?

>cat with long hair sits on my petticoat while I put on makeup
>shoo cat away
>sit to my friend at tea event
>friend starts to sneeze, gets hives
>decides to leave early without eating her cake
>eat her cake too
>come home, cat throws up on floor
>get text from friend, she’s allergic to long hair cats

I guess I can chalk up a bad day.

i though i was starting to recover from anorexia but i've been using 4chan a lot more lately and it's been really triggering lol
i especially love when girls that are very clearly underweight get called fat, it's the best meanspo. right now i'm at 500 cals a day and i'm trying to go from 108 lbs to 92 but i haven't told anyone and i'm not planning to this time

>>10336442
just realize that you're going to either A. put all the weight you lose back on or B. die

>>10336453
>B. die
That doesn't sound so bad.

>>10336442
Take it to MPA

>>10336442
that's a false dilemma lol, it's pretty easy to maintain a goal weight when it's not too extreme. i'm 5'4 so it's very achievable. i'm not planning on going any lower either.

>>10336458
>>10336453
tagged myself like a dumbass

>>10336458
>>10336459
do you really think you're going to be satisfied at your "goal weight" and stop? your brain is broken. go get help. eat a fucking vegetable and clear your brain fog , dumbass

>>10336335
Thanks anon. I feel so weak that I don't know if I'll ever have the strength to be better for myself.

>>10333593
This

People always opt out for dating apps now even though you’ll only find shallow relationships if you’re only meeting people to look for a relationship. Meeting people with the sole purpose of dating them never leads to love. Meeting people irl and making friends is the best thing you can do but everyone’s too much of a pussy to just do it or they sperg out and move to fast with people which scares people off.

>>10336458
hey anon, i was in a place like you and as >>10336453
said, you're gonna struggle with constant extreme hunger until you put the weight back on and secondly do you really want to spend your life counting calories and not being able to just live it? it's gonna break you eventually
you deserve a lot more than this <3 if you don't like yourself at your current weight you won't either when you lose more of it

>>10336458
92lbs at 5'4" is impossible to maintain without constantly starving your body. Please get some help.

>>10336324
>Anon, you're the same anon who used the term 'human females',
I said it was just a joke...
As if that was the language expected of me, since I was going to be treated as a bit regardless. But I have seen some actual useful advice here, so thanks for that.
>If you don't realize how fucked that sounded
Yes, I am perfectly aware that this sort of thing is never said in real life, and why. It is just an incredibly straightforward way to tell somebody you are interested, and the fact that nobody actually does this makes conversation a BIT more subtle.
>>10336236
she said she wanted me to "know my place".
I don't think this is very constructive criticism.

>>10336326
By going to social events like that I make it a lot less awkward. But I still need some way to avoid making it seem like I am just there to "pick up chicks" or something
besides, what I had meant by that is that somebody not in a conversation with me might enjoy it, but they are not yet thinking that they want to talk with me

Stop responding to it, gulls.

i made really good progress with my budget and saved a lot of money in the last year. but my goals are still so out of reach that sometimes i feel like i am not getting anywhere in life.

>>10334581
If you think being alone is bad, wait until you have another human being attached to you that you can't even escape from in your own home. Hell is other people

>>10336500
It's not the issue of the 'thing is never said in real life'. It's not an 'incredibly straightforward way to tell somebody you're interested, and the fact that nobody actually does this makes conversation a bit more subtle."

No, dude, no. Absolutely no one thinks that way. You sound like a cheesy rip-off of a Roosh guide to socializing at the club. "Come on, boy. Impress me. Show me what you got." The fuck, dude. You're completely disconnected from how people normally think. No one thinks like that. It's not an 'unspoken' thing. When I talk to my friends, it's not at all about them 'impressing me'.

Read about ego-death dude if you ain't gonna' see a therapist. I know that sounds strange, but ego-death is what you need. It's the only thing I can honestly think of that could sever the way you're interpreting people. /x/ can help you if they're feeling informative opposed to spewing succubus shit. Your mileage will vary.

>>10336586
>No, dude, no. Absolutely no one thinks that way.
I know that.
I specifically said it because it is the polar opposite of what I have experienced. Nobody does anything like that, I absolutely cannot expect somebody to come up to me and make it clear that they are interested in talking with me. The best I can do is hope they don't give me obvious signals that they aren't interested.
Basically I need to be better at determining when people are willing to talk, but girls seem to always give the impression that they are not wanting to talk, and I am under the impression it is because they think it is an attempt to flirt.
I am having a hard time starting conversations while not giving the impression I am not trying to get a date, and to talk long enough show off my inner worth. At least enough to make a friend.
I really want to avoid making people uncomfortable as I would hate to contribute to the problem of creeps that created this situation in the first place.

>>10336415
That sounds unfortunate, but I have to ask the important question. How scritchable is the kitty?

why am i so fucking fat. 5'3 and i'm like 130-135 lbs and i should really be 115. started dieting (replaced lunch with a salad every day) and hitting the gym (cardio plus weights) and if anything i look fatter than before.

should i just fucking fast 2 days a week or something? whenever i try fasting or seriously cutting i get really dizzy and sometimes grey out (get dizzy enough to half-faint, i plop to the floor and have to stay there a minute or two waiting for it to pass.) my bloodpressure is always borderline low and i'm freezing cold 24/7 even when everyone else is comfortable, i would unironically live in a tropical plant hot house if i could. i don't want to faint and fall down the fucking stairs but i dont' want to be fucking fat anymore i just want to be cute.

>>10336742
Spread the days out. Don’t fast two days in a row, instead fast Monday and then eat for two days and then fast Thursday. If you faint after only a day of not eating you have an underlying health problem.

>>10336746
>you have an underlying health problem
like? my constitution has always been sickly and frail.

>>10336749
Could be literally anything, are you stupid? People don’t normally pass out after a single day of not eating unless something is wrong. Doctors would not require you to fast for some procedures or blood draws if it was greatly detrimental to your health.

>>10336750
well that's great and all. so how do i lose weight like this without passing out? i can manage maintenance, but other than chipping out little 200 calorie a day chunks idk what to do.

>>10336752
If you’re too much of a little bitch to do what everyone else can manage to do you really can only do it slowly.

>>10336742
Honestly you are probably not fat but you have a mental issue making you think you are fatter than before. Get therapy.

>>10336742
I was 140 last year and i'm 110 now, 5'3. It was really easy to lose the weight by making small adjustments to my diet. Obvious things include not snacking, not eating before bed, and not eating too much sugar, but also eating protein bars and eating smaller portions helps a lot. replacing snacks with tea or vegetables like cucumber, celery, carrots is good too. Then going for walks everyday can help too., or biking. Don't go too hard on yourself immediately. You don't have to do some insane fad diet to lose weight. The main thing is just being patient and understanding how to lose weight without hurting yourself. be kind to yourself anon. Don't feel disgusting either. While you could afford to lose weight, you really aren't that fat. I doubt anyone looks at you and thinks of you as fat unless they dont see women's bodies very much. Don't think of yourself as disgusting.

>>10336742
Replacing lunch with a salad doesn't mean anything. What kind of salad? What kind of dressing? How big is the portion? What are you eating for the rest of the day? What's your gym routine? How often are you doing it? How long have you been making these changes? Have you actually been weighing and measuring yourself to see if any weight/size loss is happening?

Finally got a well paying job after being unemployed for a while after moving and it feels awesome to be able to spend without any guilt attached again

>>10336742
You're not fat. You just eat a little too much & likely are too sedentary. I use to be your weight 135 at 5'2". You're not really like... fat-fat, and that's why it's so hard for you to drop the pounds.

You're eating more then you think, and the gym won't help you lose weight. It'll tone you up, yes, but that's going to look 'fatter' to you because it's just going to make you look curvier since you're building muscle under fat. You need cardio that can't be done at the gym. Walking, running, hiking, jogging, and shit like that (on UNEVEN terrain, walking a track in a gym won't do shit) is how you gotta' lose that last bit.

The first time I lost that weight was unhealthy, constant fasting, but it still took months of me not eating just to get back to 115. Once I got better, 115. The second time I got up to 125, and, again, it was a lack of cardio paired with I was honestly eating too much when I was attending college. With an exercise routine, weekly cardio, and watching my diet opposed to starving, I'm down to 103, my weight before high school.

You get that little bit of belly and arm fat, don't you. That's why I hated it. You aren't fat though. Hell, to most, you're a perfect weight, but I understand.

>>10336768
seagull bro-science is fucking whack. nice blogpost.

Also, >>10336755 has a point albeit crudely worded. If you're passing out from a day of fasting, you might have hyperglycemia or be pre-diabetic or something which would also explain if you're gaining weight.

Uh, if you insist on fasting, maybe keep some pedialyte or honey around. The honey is important because if you can eat the honey, or fructose pills if you got those, and that alone suddenly makes you not feel like passing out... you've got some metabolic issues.

I mean, chipping out 200 calorie a day chunks is the right way to do it. You can fast, but if you're just eating normally on the other days, that's not really gonna' help you lose weight. In fact, you're body will eventually just account for it anyways.

What is a normal day's food schedule for you? Honestly, don't lie, what are you eating? I know one thing that kills me is occasional splurging. Like, eating a whole pizza on the weekend, or a bag of cereal a couple days later. Eating huge calorie amounts sporadically can cause more weight then you think.

It can take half a year or more to lose that kind of weight in a healthy manner.

>>10336769
Quality response, partner. Get them gains, boy. After all, if you don't lift, no pussy. GET 'ER DONE, MOTHERFUCKER!

>>10336773
right, because anon not taking into account that OP may have a different bodytype than her, then proceeding to blogpost and give OP asspats is super helpful!

>>10336769
Plus, men have different metabolisms then women, you know that, right? Our bodies hold on to fat because we have a layer you don't possess which allows us to have our periods. If women follow real bro-science, we end up with amenorrhea and shit. Your fitness science wasn't written for women's bodies, and that's a well known fact.

It's also true if she's passing out from fasting, that could really be a sign she's hyperglycemic. I know a few, and they can't even do an 8 hour shift without eating lest they risk fainting. That's why they always brought a chicken sandwich or fructose pills.

>>10336777
i'm a woman you idiot. sorry the term broscience triggered you. but what anon was saying was literally her version of it.

>>10336776
You're just throwing a fit that someone questioned your gain superiority.
>BUT! BUT! HER BODY MAY BE DIFFERENT!
Oh, piss somewhere else. Doesn't your dick need some fresh air or something?

>>10336779
I highly doubt it, but even if you are a women, go air out your pussy somewhere. Smells rank, dude. I can throw fits like you too, you like that? Does it make you wet? Does it get every crevice moist?

>>10336780
i. am. a woman. i was trying to say that what anon was saying is her own equivalent to when fitfags come over here and shill broscience.
>you're not fat, anon, you just need to do exactly what i did!

>>10336781
sorry you got called out for your crazy bs.

>>10336464
I have a friend of mine in a very similar scenario, but she doesn't even want to hang out or do anything with anyone anymore.
Do you think there's anything a person can do to try and help?

>>10336783
Oh, I see, you're upset people are trying to encourage her to lose weight. Look, if she feels 135 is fat, and feels she'd be happier at a lower weight, she should do it. It shouldn't make you uncomfortable that she wants to lose weight regardless of what her 'body type' might be. Going from 135 to 115 is perfectly reasonable at 5'3". Sure, if she was like 5'8" or something I'd be like, "Hold on there, bad idea."

Wanting to be 115 at 5'3" isn't unhealthy. You added: "You're not fat, anon, just do what I did." What? Lose weight? If encouraging her to go after her dream of losing weight makes you uncomfortable... that's just as unhealthy as anorexia. This is the problem with being body positive. You just down people for wanting to be skinnier for personal preference based on what you think is normal.

>>10336781
>>10336780
>>10336777
>>10336773
Uh, are you really defending >>10336768? This condescending autism?
>You get that little bit of belly and arm fat, don't you.

I'd say you're her, but maybe you just used her ~super secret magic~ cardio routine! Imagine thinking that gym cardio is somehow different and less effective than running on the sidewalk.

>>10336788
are you fucking confused? i'm not >>10336768 i was calling them out.

>>10336785
No, you just get highly uncomfortable that someone 5'3" wants to go from 135 to 115 & that people are encouraging her. Why? I don't know. I imagine because it makes you think about your own weight & you can't have that.

If you're happy at a higher weight, I got no issue with that, and would never tell you otherwise. Equally, I expect you not to have an issue with people if they do want to lose a little weight. What she's trying to lose isn't unhealthy.

>>10336788
...Do you know what greentext means?

>>10336789
I'm not talking about the sidewalk. But, if you live in a hilly region then, yes, a sidewalk is much better then the gym. Uneven terrain.

>>10336791
>>10336788
>>10336781
>>10336777
>>10336773
>>10336768
Please kys out of the thread and stop defending yourself.

>>10336792
Do you know what 'reaching' means? Now you're just upset and feeding what's became a troll at your own expense.

>>10336795
ESL anons get me every time.

>>10336794
I'm just saying the content of a thread shouldn't cause question your vision of self-esteem. The issue here is really that you're upset people are telling someone it's okay to go from 135 to 115.

>>10336796
But on a real note, if it's bothering you this much that you'd call people 'ESL' unwarranted... you don't need to be reading any of this, dude. Like, I don't want someone who use to struggle with anorexia or self-esteem issues getting uncomfortable or feeling bad over a /cgl/ thread. If... reading this shit hurts, you need to close the browser dude for your own sake.

You know, if what you're reading is a real trigger, (I ain't talking about all these stupid internet triggers.), but an actual trigger... you need to stop reading & go do something else because it isn't worth risking health arguing on /cgl/ threads.

>>10336772
It's likely hypoglycemia if she feels like she's passing out though. I have hypoglycemia and my metabolism slowed down so even though I gain a little weight now I still eat a fuckton and don't gain nearly as much as I should.

>>10336742
Fasting isn't for everyone, and there are many kinds of fasts to suit your lifestyle and body's needs. If you want to try to fast, you should try different kinds of fasting. You also need to make sure your calorie intake isn't rising from working out because that's always possible since your muscles need more to repair.

>>10336768
As others have said, this isn't really advice and anon seems like she has no idea what she's talking about (especially given that she seems to have no clue that cardio machines in the gym have resistance settings to emulate walking up a hill).

>>10336801
Yeah, but how long is she staying on the machine? I'd be bored as hell, personally. If you have the option to go out walking, it's a lot better. Most do more outside then they could on a machine because who the hell wants to walk in place two hours on a machine?

She either has to cut more calories, which very well may be unhealthy, or add more exercise in. So, anything that helps make that easier is fair game.

>>10336762
>>10336768
thanks to both of you, that's encouraging. so it is a matter of small adjustments. and yes, it's that little bit of pudge on my belly that drives me insane.
>>10336772
my diet is very inconsistent but overall reasonably healthy. homecooked, balanced meals. maybe my portion sizes are just slightly too big, paired with being largely sedentary. i also like milktea too much truth be told.
>>10336777
i don't think i'm hyperglycemic or anything. i'm always cold and lethargic, and my blood pressure is borderline low. probably just shitty circulation and generally weak+frail. it's always been this way.

Getting around by bike is a fun, easy way to increase your base activity level and get some cardio in every day

>>10336805
That's what we call a preference. I personally would rather just use my building's gym. For that matrer, if anon has issues with fainting, she's much better off in a gym anyway. Point is that there is no difference in the quality of exercise you get, and asserting that there is is stupid, especially if it's just because your own preference. Giving anon misinformation on purpose because you have a preference is kind of insane.

>>10336806
Take >>10336768 with a grain of salt and do your own research.

>>10334778
more women are going to college than men now and they are career focused
they dont have time for relationships, just a monthly tinder cock. if they do get lonely, most dont want to date a man with lower socio-economic status than herself, which many men are now.

>>10336815
>most dont want to date a man with lower socio-economic status than herself, which many men are now.
speak for yourself! i will turn that bitch into a house husband who relies on me financially!

>>10336821
Same desu, house husbands are cute

>>10336815
more women go to college than men but they mostly major in humanities things and end up with mediocre jobs. there isn't suddenly a huge amount of women in stem and upper level business right now, it's still very male dominated

>>10336831
Women are a majority even in non-humanities programs too though. It’s just that most they don’t get too far in that career since they’ll disappear a few years after school to start a family. When they come back, if they do, they have a harder time reintegrating.

>>10336837
i have a very hard time believing tech and engineering classes are filled with women, unless some kind of huge change has happened over the last couple years that i missed

>>10336853
It might be. Feminists are trying to infiltrate the industry, and have the means to do so as the ruling class. Also who knows if this includes transwomen.

>>10336855
>transwomen.
>transwomen
surgery can't change chromosomes.

How did this thread get so trash, so fast?

It's kind of petty of me but I hate having to wait for my nail artist as they are running into my appointment time. I make a 2 hour appointment a few days in advance and get there on time only to have to wait 30 minutes every single time. It's always some girl who walked in in between appointments getting boring ass nails too.

>>10336865
Every single time weight is brought up, the bait must taste like ambrosia for it to work every time.

>>10336855
>Feminists
>ruling class

Lmao, begone scrote.

>>10336855
>>10336853
>>10336837
>>10336831
>>10336815
This doesn't answer the question of why there are a lower number of women than men wanting to find a find a date in any given situation. Whether it be at University, cons, or online dating, there are multiple men competing for every woman.

>>10336870
learn to do your own. gitgud. but seriously it's not the stylist's fault, your salon is probably just actually a bad workplace. bad nail salon managers will cram as many people into a day that can fit.

>>10336922
because that's how most men behave
they are perusing multiple girls at any given time
that's what they need to do if they want to have a chance because women are so picky. women are so picky because they have lots of guys chasing them
it's a nasty feedback loop

>>10336925
*pursuing
but i guess that word works too

I'm an autist with no friends. Should I go to a con? I feel like if i went i would just check a few things out, awkwardly stand around with nobody talking to me then leave after about an hour.

>>10336925
This is horrible, how do we stop it?
>>10336950
Just talk to other men, you will be fine.

>>10336960
genetically engineered cat girls with balanced sex drives to replace humanity. some catgirls will have dicks

>>10336950
>>10336961
This is why they don't want men here...
Besides, it's not just about sex drive, it's not like you can easily get girls if you say you are willing to commit.

i have no friends, am no contact with my family, have no online presence, and don't go out anywhere except work, the gym, and the grocery store. how do i explain this to potential boyfriends?

>>10336873
Who makes up most of the work force?
Who owns most of the stock market?
Who is most of the marketing geared towards?
Who runs the military industrial complex?
Who got the most presidential contributions last election?
Who makes up most of the leadership of both parties?
Who organized a cattle drive to uphold their place as the ruling class?
I can go on, but if you think the answer to any of these questions is men then congrats on not being educated.

>>10336976
what

>>10336960
>>10336965
Why did you both automatically assume the anon you replied to is male

>>10336966
I understand, I can be your boyfriend!
In all seriousness, most heavily socialized men won't really like that sort of thing. You should be able to find a decently attractive man, just not a confident flirtatious type.

>>10337038
because women always have friends, and if they don't, it is as easy as making eye contact with a man.

>>10334526
>college is the easiest place in the world to make friends. If you're socially stunted in college you're fucked when you get out. There are a million things to do to meet people on campus, break out of your shell and just fucking do them jesus
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
TWO YEARS AND I STILL HAVENT TALKED TO ANYONE IN COLLEGE. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER A SINGLE NAME, NOT ONE. I HAVENT GOT CREDITS FOR 4 MONTHS

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAASSSSAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

>>10334616
>How have you gone your whole life without knowing a girl?
I'll vent. You get bullied or nobody likes you. If you dont have any friends then you wont meet any girls either.

I dont even post here, I'll fuck off.

>>10337047
>confusing friendship and some scrote just being thirsty
you really are that stupid

>>10337049
>I HAVENT GOT CREDITS FOR 4 MONTHS
So you just don’t go to class?

>>10337059
you can easily get friendship from the loneliness of men. It's harder for men to do, since they can be seen as competition or threatening to the other man.

>>10337063
Not for a while yeah. I used to read materials home but I havent had the energy to do that either.

Life sucks

>>10336966
"I'm boring. You can do better than me."

>>10336922
Well, being in a relationship benefits men more than women. Women don’t get a social boost or whatever from being in a relationship. Plus, they have to put in more emotional fuel than men because men were never taught social skills apparently. If most relationships weren’t so tedious, then you would see less voluntary celibates. Doesn’t help that men are fed the idea that having a gf will fix all the problems in their life. Imagine hooking up with someone and having to act as their therapist and Mom #2. No thanks, I’ll stick to my cats and my frilly dresses.

>>10336966
as long as you look decent, men aren't going to care. i'm a total hermit and guys are still all over me.

>>10337076
Seems about right. Neither me or my friends could expect much emotional support from each other even though we have known for 15 years. There really isn't any emotional support for men so everything gets offloaded to you.

When my dog dies the only person I can really cry with is my mother and when she dies there really isn't a shoulder left.

>>10337068
Willingly getting close to incels who will inevitably feel led on and feel entitled to some kind of compensation?
I'll pass, thanks. That's basically setting yourself up to be raped or murdered.

>>10337084
you should consider talking to a therapist.
like, now. why wait until your mom dies?

>>10337076
Is there anything I can be for a woman so that she wouldn't mind giving me emotional support? I've heard it's one of the better aspects of having a girlfriend...
I wouldn't enjoy the relationship if I knew I was imposing on her for my sake.

>>10336950
Probably not if you have that attitude about it.

>>10337102
Not all men are like that by default
And being devoid of women's attention certainly isn't going to change you to care less for them when they would finally give you attention.

>>10337122
No. Women don't need emotional support from men because female friendships aren't devoid of feelings and deep bonds. All men who don't have emotional support already from their friends who date women end up treating them like therapists.

>>10337076
>Plus, they have to put in more emotional fuel than men
LOL. Men are are under constant pressure to interpret womens behavior to gauge interest and entertain you or your attention shifts to one of the other 20 guys trying to fuck you. Women literally have to do nothing in dating

>>10337153
Most are but it's womens fault
It's like if a woman shoots a man and tells him it's his fault for feeling pain, not that she shot him.

>>10337084
>>10337122
>expecting a woman to fix you
are you so beta that you can't fix yourself? seek fucking professional help, don't expect your girlfriend to be your therapist. That's shitty to her, and puts a lot of pressure on a normal person who isn't trained to help you like a therapist.
you deserve to be alone until you get your head straight or you'll make a shitty partner

>>10337168
A therapist doesn't really care about you, at least not in the sense that someone you are dating does so strongly. Is there really nothing I could provide, emotionally or materially, to get care like this from a girlfriend without it being a one sided relationship?
I don't want to be a burden on somebody I love, but this sort of thing feels like a human necessity.

>>10337195
>are you so beta that you can't fix yourself? seek fucking professional help, don't expect your girlfriend to be your therapist. That's shitty to her, and puts a lot of pressure on a normal person who isn't trained to help you like a therapist.
you deserve to be alone until you get your head straight or you'll make a shitty partner
Is this an bait because I really can't tell. Do you expect to simply sit in the sidelines when tragedy falls upon your SO? Do you really think that you shouldn't bother your SO if you ever get into a sudden tough spot? Maybe someone in your family gets ill etc etc.

It's quintessentially American that the only person you can seek help is your therapist whom you have to pay. If you can't expect or won't help the your dearest person then what do your relationships consist of? You go by your day with people whom you don't care about and call them friends and family?
>are you so beta that you can't fix yourself?
It must be an bait right? I'm responding to an bait since I wrote in a future tense and you go out of your way to shitpost

>>10337195
I am not broken, so I do not need anybody to fix me. I would not be going into the relationship with any problem, but what if I had something bad in my life happen, like a family member died? Even though I can recover on my own, it would be nice to have somebody close care for me.

>have prominent raised self harm scars on my thighs
>get dance tights thinking theyd hide them
>they come
>try them on
>still super visible as if i'm not even wearing tights

fuck me i guess

>>10337220
If it makes you feel better, I would feel sympathy if I saw them.

>>10337207
Well I am glad someone else agrees.
but I do generally think she was right that a man having a relationship with a woman is more beneficial to him than it is to her.
I wish this could change, maybe I wish I could offer more to women, but men not at all relying on women emotionally destroys the good in the relationship altogether.

>>10337220
i feel you anon, one of my arms and both shoulders are covered with them, which makes me more uncomfortable with my bare arms than i already was but it is what it is,it's you, just own it, dont overwork yourself trying to hide it, it's harder for other people to notice than it is for you

>>10337195
Mentally ill women are tolerated
Stop having double standards

>>10337196
No, there isn't. Stop treating potential girlfriends like the only emotional support you could have. Get friends who emotionally support you, who you can share your feelings and thoughts with, and who will provide genuine feedback and advice without mockery. Otherwise, you will be one of those men who treats their girlfriend like a therapist.

>>10337382
You shouldn't deal in absolutes sempai.

>>10337396
At no point have I dealt in absolutes. I'm saying what happens IF men don't have emotional support from elsewhere; they put it all on their partners. If they have it from other people, then they don't do that. Otherwise, once they have an outlet, it all spews out. Read the posts by that anon through this and tell me he wouldn't unload on the first girl to let him.

>>10337445
Some people have outlets and still won't unload. I'm not going to assume his or her personality traits.

>>10337474
>Some people have outlets and still won't unload.
That's literally what I'm saying? If men have someone else to talk with, they don't treat their girlfriend like a therapist. If they don't, and they see a girlfriend as their only way to get emotional support, they will.

>>10337382
How much emotion can I share with a girlfriend? It really seems like it would be one of the best parts of a relationship, otherwise I don't know what the point is?
What emotional reason then do women enter relationships for?

>>10337170
They aren’t expected to do anything to find dates (other than look good, I suppose), but are expected to do everything when dating.

>>10337715
says you
men have to appear to be constantly ambitious and improving or women will think they are lazy dead ends and monkey branch to a better guy
men are always playing whack-a-mole with every guy that talks to you
men are responsible for defending women and will be shamed to the point of suicide if he ever left his wife or girlfriend for dead to save himself
they do this think called providing and literally allowing you to eat and exist, but that's going out of fashion fast

>>10337704
>What emotional reason then do women enter relationships for?
Because the nice things in life are nice when shared with a partner. And anyway, there’s a difference between how you treat a lifelong companion and how you treat a therapist. Obviously your partner should stick with you if your parent just died and provide comfort. What they shouldn’t have to do is deal with you venting the childhood traumas that the death unlocked. If you have a shitty day at work, it’s fine to complain. If work is consistently being shitty and you’re always stressed, time to talk to a therapist and not just constantly have your partner as an emotional dumping hole. The key is to be considerate when you offload, but repressed men typically aren’t socially trained well enough to pick up on what’s inappropriate and end up burning out their partner.

>>10337722
Do you think these things only apply to men? There are men who will monkey branch to a better girl too, under the excuse that their wife let herself go or something. If a women doesn’t keep up appearances, they are considered lazy. Anyone can play whack-a-mole, and it’s typically the sign of an insecure relationship. If anything, women get accused of ‘leading men on’ while men don’t have that stigma. Finally, anyone would be shamed for abandoning their family, the fuck, are you condoning that shit? If you have the ability then you also have the responsibility.

> they do this think called providing and literally allowing you to eat and exist
You need to stop drinking the kool-aid, pal. In any case, men have the choice to not be burdened with all these responsibilities... by not entering a relationship... and yet most guys aren’t voluntarily single. Take that as you will.

>>10337704
Agreed with >>10337724, and along with that, she can't be your only source of strength or emotional support through hard times, either. If a tragic event happens, of course you can be sad, but she can't be your one pillar of support. You have to have family and friends who will listen to you and be there for you, too. Otherwise, we're back to therapist territory.

Women get into relationships to feel romantic love, enjoy sharing their life with a partner, and sex. The point of a relationship isn't to just have someone carry you emotionally through life. That's exhausting and shitty to deal with.

>>10337724
What if I want to be treated like this by my girlfriend? I wouldn't mind hearing more of what she has to say, getting to know her better.
Maybe I just feel this way because I have been lacking for it all my life.
So is it the case that women generally have already had enough people to rely on, and enough people relying on them?

>>10337724
>tfw there's absolutely no way I could be in a relationship without talking about my childhood traumas
Just fuck my shit up

>>10337733
what does this feeling of romantic love entail outside of emotional communication, then? I agree that men are generally in need of this emotional connection and because of this they are more desperate for a relationship, but what part of this can I actively do to make myself more desirable for this relationship?
I am willing to learn.

>>10337761
You realize that by asking me this you're doing the literal thing we're asking you not to, right? You're asking me to perform emotional labour to teach you how to be "desirable" when all that does is take up my time and energy and let you unload your problems onto a woman and hope she fixes them.

>>10337764
Pretty much. It’s like they don’t realize that saying ‘just tell me what to do, I’ll fix it!’ is a form of dependency where they’re relying on the woman to be the manager. Think of what to do yourselves. You can learn by observing the socially adjusted people around you. Look at the people in stable, happy relationships. What are they doing? Why does it work? If you want to be more skillful with emotional connections, you have to put in the work and not just wait around for someone to spoonfeed you.

>>10337764
well, I guess I can see it now...
This sort of environment basically exist for that, though.
I think that it would be better for both men and women, if more men got help like this. The men who, despite decent genetic appearance, seem to have no ability to start dating likely can't crawl out of the bucket of crabs.
I assume there are just as many women who currently want boyfriends as there are men who want girlfriends? It is just that men are more desperate for it.
But I hope this self perpetuating problem can be solved.

>>10336442
fake and gay

>>10337836
>This sort of environment basically exist for that, though.

No it doesn't. This board exists for lolita/j-fashion and cosplay and related shit, and this thread is meant for moaning about those things or at least by people who participate in those things. Don't just come here because it's the girl board and expect women to spoonfeed you ways to fix your problems.

>>10336442
Thanks for the second-hand embarrassment, I hope you gain.

>>10336442
Speaking of eating issues...
>Be 25 year old male
>Lonely with body image issues
>Lose weight trying to get back to high school size
>Reach 150 lbs
>Realize when I raise arms in air that my ribcage has grown since then and that I need to stop because skin is so tight that my ribs are painfully poking
>Sitting happy around 155
I did my best, but I can't comfortably be as skinny as I want to be. I'm 6'2" and little muscle so I guess I can concentrate on getting fit.

>>10337924
it says "feels thread - con funk edition"
I have feels that originated from a discussion about cons.
Isn't there somewhere dedicated to talking about these sorts of problems, even if needs friendly strangers to preform emotional labor for the good of the dating world?

>>10337935
>Isn't there somewhere dedicated to talking about these sorts of problems
Yes... in your therapy session...

>>10338053
That is a completely different dynamic. Even if the therapist is a woman, she will be significant older than me and live an entirely separate social world.
I need to be able to talk would this with a girl I could have hypothetically dated if I already had the help.

>>10338268
Have you even looked up therapists in your area? If you don’t see one that isn’t “significantly” older than you then you’re probably underaged.

>>10338373
I'm 21.
I guess there will be some that just graduated. Will it really be okay to request a young woman as a therapist, especially when I am focusing on my relationship with women?

As a girl, is it creepy to print off pictures of other lolitas and hang them on my wall? Cause one girl is the handsomest Ouji i'e ever seen and I want to look at her every day.

>>10338840
Just make sure no one else sees and you're fine, that logic works for lots of stuff actually