/cgl/ - Cosplay & EGL

>Lack of money due to no one in the area hiring
>Friend really wants me to go to con
>Says she'll let me stay in hotel room for free so it's less money to save
>Mom'll give me the money to go since that's like 100$ less bucks since no hotel room
>Buying ticket and whatnot
>Message friend saying that I can definitely go and what not
>Friend doesn't remember ever offering to let me stay in their room and I can't just ask to stay because muh pride and general dislike of asking people for things
I give up on trying to go to cons until I have my own car and job.

I have a weird as fuck social phobia. Like, I can go out, but I always get tired really quickly and only sometimes do I worry about whether or not people are talking about me/staring.
I also tend to not talk to friends at all. Like, I consider them my good friends, but I don't txt them or pm them or anything unless they start the conversation. And I feel really lonely too. I wish I could talk with them 24/7 and visit them (my only good friends live 2 hours or more away) but I always feel like I'm annoying them or I run out of things to talk about and don't reply back.

Another thing is that there's this semi-annoying girl that lives right down the street from me, and I can call her a friend, but she's not really a friend to me. I lie to her all the time about being busy and pretend that my phone isn't working when she calls. I mean, she's nice, and pretty much the only person near me with similar interests, but she's a pathological liar, requires a LOT of energy to be around, obvious weeb "i dun give a fuck about what the normies think!!1" attitude, and dumped her nice boyfriend (who paid to come to the states to see her like twice and was always really nice to her) for some other dude whom she had been fawning over for months.
I just want to be able to have friends with similar interests and be able to hold daily conversations with them like a normal human being.