/biz/ - Business & Finance

[Anonymous No.9923077]

Sit down anon, we really need to talk....

Listen, I heard on the news that your internet money isn't doing too well anymore. I remember, I promised you I would love you forever and held you so tight that day you told me you bought a "dank amount of BTC" when it was cheap, but something has changed and the feeling just isn't there anymore... I still love you but I'm just not IN love with you anymore okay?! I just don't understand you these days, you talk about a LINK or a FUN coin, what the fuck is a FUN COIN? It sounds so childish and stupid...

I think I'll be okay though, I heard Chad invested in NVIDIA, a real company that produces real things and has real cash flow. Listen now and don't freak out, I think I'm going to stay at his house for a few days and work through my emotions, I just need some time, I'm not ready for a relationship right now, I'm still emotionally sore.

Bye anon...

[Anonymous No.9923089]

How many gallons per hour anon?

[Anonymous No.9923090]

>>9923077
Good. I was looking to break up with you for this girl anyways

[Anonymous No.9923115]

I can't relate to this breakup story because I've never had a girlfriend in the first place, its emotional potential for harm is lost on me.

[Anonymous No.9923158]

>>9923077
Deuces Stacy, enjoy your privilege life, don't come back because i only have time for FUN now. LINK will make my stink'n (not like your farts) rich

[Anonymous No.9923262]

>>9923115
>can‘t get attached to the bags I buy
>can‘t get attached to any woman

[Anonymous No.9923312]

>>9923077
Chad is the greater fool than us.

Wait till Nvidia's earnings report during a bear market. Their profit is heavily affected by the profitability of crypto mining. Less profit, less graphic card sales. Stay poor. DYOR

[Anonymous No.9923321]

>>9923077
It's okay Stacy.
I tried a pool cleaner vacuum while underwater, especially with a heated pool, it gave me the best orgasm of my entire life. the fans rapidly but gently smack the head of your dick while giving really strong suction. obviously stick your fingers in first to make sure it's safe, not every pool vacuum is the same. I've had blowjobs from 3 different women and 4 different men, I've used vacuums, cock-pumps, fleshlights, vibrators... and NOTHING compares to the pool cleaner. I'm not even fucking kidding right now, if you get the chance, try it. the only thing that is even remotely close to how good that pool vacuum felt was straight up vaginal sex with this fat chick who had a really warm snatch, it was like sticking my dick into a wet loaf of banana bread straight out of the oven, and yes this fucking pool cleaner vacuum was better than that. I don't own a pool or else I'd be doing it every day. unfortunately the owner of the pool caught me doing it so I'm not allowed to be within 1000 feet of his house anymore but it was so fucking worth it, I'm telling you that fucking pool vacuum is like heaven. honestly the only reason I even want to make it with LINK is so I can afford my own house with a heated pool and of course a pool vacuum. I can't wait to buy a dozen different brands and styles of pool cleaners and fuck them all. I live for that day to come.

[Anonymous No.9923564]

>>9923262

This desu, dead inside and it's incredibly liberating.

[Anonymous No.9923581]

>>9923077
>I still love you but I'm just not IN love with you anymore
> I think I'm going to stay at his house for a few days and work through my emotion
>I'm still emotionally sore.

This anon knows the talk

[Anonymous No.9923625]

Damn, just had the talk yesterday. My gf of 3 years broke up with me and Im kind of lost. Where do I start over bros?

[Anonymous No.9923659]

>>9923077
Why the fuck do you faggots always larp about being left by gf ? You are fucking worse than cucks. Do you have a being dumped fetish or something ?

[Anonymous No.9923673]

>>9923077
IDC STUPID WHORE

[Anonymous No.9923689]

No!!!!
STACEY!!! Please don't leave me alone...I can change, I can get rich, I just gotta wait it out, please stop packing, Stacey, don't go!

[Anonymous No.9923696]

>>9923659
Don't you have flens anon? We make fun of our frens irl that get cucked by chicks. I also have some pastas I made (not any of the popular ones tho) that are like this one. They are all based on reality and events from real life where people I know acts like retards and get cucked by their gfs.

I have personally heard flens hope that their gf is gonna work through her emotions...at her exes place ;))

[Anonymous No.9923700]

>>9923077
No stacy i swear my stinkies will be worth billions!!

[Anonymous No.9923703]

>>9923625
Harsh, now who will force you to go to bed bath and beyond or take up your weekend doing trivial expensive shit because she wants to 'spend some time together'.
Just wait for robots

[Anonymous No.9923738]

>>9923696
Thats because you and your friends are pathetic
>>9923659
Its how the fat NEETs view relationships despite having never been in any

[Anonymous No.9923745]

>>9923077
the fuck would you buy fun when P3D literally made a meme game economy of its own that actually launched.

[Anonymous No.9923778]

>>9923077
Tfw no girl will ever love me (pic related)
>>9923321
Haha it's been a while this pasta has been posted

[Anonymous No.9923782]

>>9923077
lol 3D
Just Monika.

[Anonymous No.9923795]

>>9923738
Nah. My flens are pathetic. I have 2girlfriends, exclusive relationship with both ;)

[Anonymous No.9923806]

>>9923077
nice badonkadonks

[Anonymous No.9923820]

>>9923795
What a waste of time and effort

[Anonymous No.9923821]

>>9923795
can you just go back to /b/? there's no bull run until 2020

[Anonymous No.9923825]

I've known women like this before. The ones who actually manage to snag nouveaue riche young guys are much better at hiding their intentions behind pretext. Gold diggers this transparent either end up being pumped and dumped because their sucker gets wise to their game, or they end up with an old dude.

[Anonymous No.9923848]

I’m getting PTSD from that shit. Fuck that cunt for what she did

[Anonymous No.9923855]

By this logic is post malone beta? He says “you stuck in the friendzone” at the same time “she said can i have some to hold and i can never say no”

[Anonymous No.9923879]

>>9923855

He's admitting that he pays for it. Depends on if you subscribe to Lil Wayne's theorum of "It Ain't Trickin if You Got It", but personally I don't think that the numbers shake out.

[Anonymous No.9923882]

>>9923077
>Alex, I'll take "things a bitch would never say to me" for 10,000
>implying any woman has ever questioned my investment decisions
>implying even bitches I am not fucking don't ask me for financial advice
>implying my own father doesn't cross check with me on money matters
2/10 bait OP.

>>9923848
>>9923825
fake and gay. You're either terrible with money or virgins.

[Anonymous No.9923926]

>>9923882

It's not when she tracks the numbers on your investments. It's when you stop shelling out for expensive dinners that she can post photos of on instagram, when you stop taking her to events that she spends more time posting about on facebook than enjoying, and stop springing for surprise vacations and designer clothing.

See, this kind of girl doesn't understand business and finance. She doesn't have to. She understands a single query:

>Is he spending cash on me? [Y/N]

[Anonymous No.9923931]

>>9923882
>>implying my own father doesn't cross check with me on money matters
some day, you'll turn 14 and need to go out and get a job

[Anonymous No.9923949]

>>9923077
that’s ok stacy
i was just using you as a cum dumpster

[Anonymous No.9923960]

>>9923581
>I'm babysitting his dog while he's away

Another good one.

[Anonymous No.9923999]

>>9923926
>dating a golddigger in the first place
wew

>>9923931
Unlike you're cope ridden pathetic ass, my father actually did a good job of instilling judgment and self-reliance in me. Don't be so condescending just because someone's father respects their own son's opinion. Instead ask yourself - why haven't you earned yours?

[Anonymous No.9924016]

>>9923999
easy, orphanages don't come with parents
What do you want for your 14th birthday champ? I hope you've been practicing that "firm-handshake" I taught you!

[Anonymous No.9924038]

>>9923999

You date a gold digger the way that you date any woman. You >imply a level of commitment that you don't actually say that you are going to make so that you can play off hitting and quitting it as a misunderstanding when she throws a bitch fit about how you played her.

This is macking 101.

[Anonymous No.9924092]

>>9924016
Not an argument, even an orphan would respect that parental figures can grow admiration or respect for those they raised. Why don't you actually make a argument and challenge me? Try and prove me wrong. Show you knowledge and insight into the world! Please! Why are you so obsessed with this adolescent joke? it's cliched, come up with a more original insult, how about something actually based on the content of what I said? Are you capable of that?

>>9924038
But if you're truly macking she'll be spending money on YOU, right? Isn't that how it works?

[Anonymous No.9924107]

>>9924092

No. Macking is when you're just trying to nut. Pimping is when you're getting a dollar out of here. Every Pimp is a Mack, but most Macks are not Pimps.

[Anonymous No.9924120]

>>9924107
>Every Pimp is a Mack, but most Macks are not Pimps.
Righteous. I've misjudged you player.

[Anonymous No.9924133]

>>9924120

No worries.

[Anonymous No.9924454]

>>9923077
Stacy, I'm sorry I guess I should tell you now, I have HIV. I know we always were careful with using protection because you didn't want to get pregnant, but those couple of times we got really drunk...

Go get tested.
Remember when your sister and I dated for couple weeks back before I met you?
I've always known, I just thought you'd leave me if I told you.
I already let Chad know, he started crying over the phone. I need go refill my suppression drugs, don't want to get AIDS and all. Goodbye Stacy...
Jesus fuck Stacy it's just a stop freaking out.
Oh come on, HIV is barely fatal anymore in the developed world, youre overreacting.
She said it came from a scene she shot 3 years ago. You know she's always asking me if you'd be into a threeway so chill. It's not my fault your twin sister is a freak with AIDS. Any way I'll cya later, Kayla's been texting me all morning since you told her you were breaking up with me. I'm always here for you if you need to talk or have any questions. Also let us know if you change your mind about that three way, we could make a lot of BTC on the internet, the three of us. Cya.

[Anonymous No.9925278]

>>9924133
lol thanks for reminding me of that song its awesome

[Anonymous No.9925360]

>>9923581
I was thinkin the same, shit hit too close to home

[Anonymous No.9925466]

A guy told me one time, "Don't let yourself get attached to anything you are not willing to walk out on in 30 seconds flat if you feel the heat around the corner." Now, if you're on me and you gotta move when I move, how do you expect to keep a... a marriage?

[Anonymous No.9925505]

>>9923077
that's my sister

[Anonymous No.9926064]

>>9925466
>"Don't let yourself get attached to anything you are not willing to walk out on in 30 seconds flat if you feel the heat around the corner."

That's from the movie Heat, it's 3 hours long and it's just ok.