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/biz/ - Business & Finance

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57795948 No.57795948 [Reply] [Original]

>normies get mad jealous when you tell them you have a 6 figure remote job

>> No.57796024
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57796024

>>57795948
im mad jealous too how can i do this

>> No.57796040

>>57796024
bump

>> No.57796058

Im waiting to hear back after my 2nd interview for a literal 6 figure remote job after being jobless for 5+ months, pray for me bizbros.

>> No.57796197

>>57795948
>png-transparent
>it's not transparent

>> No.57796319

>>57796024
>>57796040
This. Bump.

>> No.57796456

1. Get good. Learn the lingo. Learn the high level abstract aspects for whatever position you’re going into. Integrate this into a false history and when asked speak as if you’ve experienced it and how it went.
2. Dont act like you know everything. It’s even fine to act like you know little. If you can portray yourself as a kind, patient, organized, fast thinking and intelligent problem solver they will hire you with little technical skills.
3. Drink a 40 oz malt liquor bevvie right before you go into the interview. This will relax you
4. Put your phone on a volume level that is barely audible and have music of your choice playing on repeat from within your pocket. If anyone asks about it act like you don’t understand. Then tell them you don’t own a phone. Then if pressed get defensive and stand your ground - this is a shit test. If they can’t handle you at your worst they don’t deserve you at your best.
4. Tell them you’ll work for free. Experience is its own reward. As soon as you’re hired on find out what room you can sleep in and how to bypass the alarm systems so you can get to the restroom at night
6. Talk about your big brother fondly but only vaguely, if anyone asks for more information get worked up and tell them you aren’t ready to “go there” and if you can, make yourself cry. This shows emotional depth
7. Find out whoever is in front of you for promotions and play gay porn on their computer when they get up go somewhere. Once they’re fired you’re promoted. This works infinite times
6. After getting fired, or even having never been hired in the first place, give the next employer their info and tell them you worked for them for 8 years and are just looking for a better challenge. This is where you get your first job at Olive Garden.
7. Pay your way through school
8. Become manager at Olive Garden
9. Find peace and become content with your mediocre life. At least you get to flirt with young waitresses

>> No.57796488

>>57795948
>normies
You have to go back.

>> No.57796668
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57796668

>>57795948
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA fr
>NOOO YOU CAN'T EARN 4 TIMES MY SALARY, I WORK 3 JOBS 60 HOURS A WEEK
I do, fag.
I literally just invest. Be it stocks, bitcoin, shitcoins like bigmike or whatever
I am better off than you, Brandon, deal with it or fuck off

>> No.57796779

>>57796024
There's bitcoin, there's ethereum, memecoins, shitcoins... Just google it, anon

>> No.57796782

>>57796456
im not reading all that

>> No.57796789

>>57796782
No way the tiktok/yt short brainrot spread to fucking 4chan
This site has gone to shit, i'm leaving fags
I can't take it anymore

>> No.57796794

>>57796789
the fuck does any of that have to do with tiktok????

>> No.57796807

>>57796794
>low attention span
>ignoring and belittling helpful information
I DON'T KNOW, YOU TELL ME, ANON

>> No.57797226

>>57796488
Facts

>> No.57797245

>>57796668
>brandon
now you have tell us the fucking story fag
it's an unwritten rule cmon