/biz/ - Business & Finance

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Anonymous Wed Dec 7 20:25:55 2022 No.52775693 [Reply] [Original]

'Twas the night before Staking, when all throughout /biz/
Not a Linkie was selling a single a Link of his.
The staking pool was made ready on chain.link with care
In hopes that Sergey Nazarov soon would be there.

The marines were nestled all snug in their beds,
While visions of yacht parties danced in their heads.
And mommy with her milkers, and I in my cap,
this yacht party be bussin', and these tunes they do slap.

When out on the imageboard there arose such a clatter,
I sprang from the bed to see what was the matter.
Away to the computer I flew like a flash,
Clicked open 4chan, Business & Finance.

The green Wojaks on images of the newly made threads
Gave the lustre of money to my face as I read.
When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But a thread titled 'ANON, THE SINGULARITY IS HERE.'

With my hands all a quiver I gave it a click,
I thought for a moment it must be some devilish trick.
More loudly than trumpets the wailing it came,
My neighbours, they bellowed, and AAAAAAAA'd, and called out in shame!

"Now, Sergey! now, Ari! now, Assblaster and Schmidt!
I didn't buy Chainlink and the singularity I've missed!
To the top of the chart the line flew in a thrall!
Now I'm stuck as a wagie while Linkies make it, one and all!"

As designated streets that were, before the curry, clean,
When they meet with a Pajeet, mount high with poo.
So up to the Chart-top the candles they flew,
With the price surging in Sats, Vits, and fiat money too.

And then, in a twinkling, I heard up above for a while
The straining and creaking of each single roof tile.
As I drew in my head, and was turning around,
Through the ceiling Sergey Nazarov fell with a bound.

He was dressed all in plaid, from his neck to his waist,
And his expression was fitting of one man so based.
A bundle of Chainlink he had flung on his back,
And he looked like a peddler, just opening his pack.

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