LEARN TO CODE

[Anonymous No.52495379]

>NOOOOOO!!! NOOOOOO!!! NOOOOOO!!!
>THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE!!!
>COMPUTER SCIENCE WILL CONTINUE TO DEFY WAGE TRENDS THAT ARE APPLICABLE TO LITERALLY EVERY OTHER TECHNICAL AND NON-TECHNICAL CAREER THAT HAS EVER EXISTED!!!!!!!!!
>WHAT DO YOU MEAN BEING OVEREMPLOYED IN 5 DIFFERENT BIG TECH COMPANIES GETTING A TC OF 500K FROM EACH ONE TOTALLING IN 2.5M A YEAR WHILE ""WORKING"" A GRAND TOTAL OF 2 HOURS FROM HOME A WEEK MEANS I *MIGHT* BE IN A BUBBLE?!?!?!?!?!
>DUDE JUST STUDY COMPUTER SCIENCE AND LEARN ALL KNOWN ALGORITHMS IN EXISTENCE AND ALL DATA STRUCTURES REGARDLESS OF HOW OBSCURE THEY ARE JUST LEARN CALCULUS I II III IIII AND LINEAR ALGEBRA I II III AND ALL OF STATISTICS AND TOPOLOGY AND ABSTRACT ALGEBRA AND NUMBER THEORY AND CRYPTOGRAPHY AND DYNAMIC SYSTEMS AND ALL OPTIMIZATION TECHNIQUES AND THEN ALL PROGRAMMING PARADIGMS ALL AT THE SAME TIME BRO IT'S EASY THEN LEARN CONCURRENT PROGRAMMING DISTRIBUTED COMPUTING THEORY OF COMPUTATION COMPILERS OPERATING SYSTEMS THEN GRAPHS GRAPHICS AND GRAPHIXXX BRO JUST LEARN A BIT OF ARTIFICIAL INTELLIGENCE AND SIMULATIONS HAHA. WHAT, ACTUAL TOOLS FOR A JOB? YOU CAN LEARN THAT ON THE SIDE BRO JSUT LEARN .NET CORE POSTGRES SQLSERVER MYSQL SQLTHIS SQLTHAT MONGODB NOSQL(HAHA) SPRING BOOT ANGULAR REACT VUE ASTRO SOLID QWIK SVELTE NEST.JS EXPRESS.JS KOA.JS NODE.JS NIGGERS.JS JSP JAVASCRIPT ES5 ES6 ES7 C C++ C# F# D HASKELL SCALA ADA ELIXIR RUBY AND RUBY ON RAILS CLOJURE JAVA 7 JAVA 8 JAVA 11 JAVA 18 JAVA 19 (IM LOOOOOMING) GO RUST BASH PYTHON DOCKER KUBERNETES AWS OCI GCP AZURE I MEAN JUST MIX IT ALL UP AND MAKE YOUR PRETTY PORTIFOLIO WITH YOUR MACHINE LEARNING PET PROJECTS JUST INTERN AT FAGMAN BRO IT'S EASY HAHA JUST DO ALL THAT WHILE WORKING TWO SHIFTS AT MCDONALDS BEUCASE YOUR PARENTS KICKED YOU OTU OF HTE HOUSE AT 18 YO I MEAN BRO IT'S ALRIGHT AFTER THAT YOU CAN JUST WAGESLAVE FOR 55 YEARS IN THE CODE MINES DEALING WITH OFFICE POLITICS AND BEING FED PROGRESSIVE PROPAGANDA AND THEN YOU CAN INVEST ALL THE AFTER AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

[Anonymous No.52495399]

>>52495379
They laid off marketing departments and HR roasties. Cope harder.

[Anonymous No.52495402]

none of the programmers lost their jobs, it was stacy in marketing and her 3 project managers

[Anonymous No.52495409]

>>52495379
if you are a software engineer and you got laid off from a faang company, you are probably going to not have a hard time getting a good job at some middle market company

[Anonymous No.52495429]

>>52495379
>SO WHAT IF I'M LAID OFF!!!!!
>I GET 53468 EMAILS A DAY FROM RECRUITERS OFFERING TO BLOW MY COCK FOR $1.67 TRILLION TC MINIMUM!!!!!!
>I'LL JUST QUIT AND GET 90 OF THESE JOBS AND WORK THEM ALL SIMULTANEOUSLY UNTIL I EARN MORE THAN THE AGGREGATE GDP OF THE ENTIRE WORLD!!!!!!!!!!!!
>LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN THE UNIVERSE IS SOFTWARE!!!!!!!!!!!!
>I AM SMARTER AND HIGHER IQ AND MORE HANDSOME AND MORE VALUABLE THAN LITERALLY ALL OTHER PROFESSIONS COMBINED!!!!!!!
>THERE WILL NEVER BE A SHORTAGE OF SOFTWARE WORK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Anonymous No.52495444]

>>52495399
>>52495402
prove it

[Anonymous No.52495452]

[Anonymous No.52495469]

dont care still coding

[Anonymous No.52495471]

>>52495444

[Anonymous No.52495477]

>>52495402
>>52495399
They only fire technical staff. The middle management and HR toasties are the ones who do the firing. They are never fired.
Useless trash is never fired

[Anonymous No.52495483]

public void AddItem(ItemObject _item, int _amount)
{
for (int i = 0; i < Container.Count; i++)
{
if (Container[i].item == _item)
{
Container[i].AddAmount(_amount);
return;
}
}
Container.Add(new InventorySlot(database.GetId[_item], _item, _amount));
}

[Anonymous No.52495484]

>>52495402
source faggot :)

[Anonymous No.52495485]

>>52495429
anon are you ok?

[Anonymous No.52495490]

>>52495429
>SOFTWARE SALARY CUTS??? ARE YOU TRIPPING MY GUY??????
>WE ARE IN THE MIDST OF A CATASTROPHIC SOFTWARE SHORTAGE!!!!!! PEOPLE ARE DYING FOR SOFTWARE!!!!!!!!!
>WE'RE UNDERPAID IF ANYTHING
>PAID AS MUCH AS A DOCTOR FOR 2 HOURS WFH WHERE I CHANGE A BUTTON'S COLOR FROM BLUE TO RED? SO? WHAT'S YOUR POINT?!?!
>VALUE. VALUE. VALUE. IT'S ALL ABOUT PROVIDING VALUE!
>AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH

[Anonymous No.52495503]

>>52495477
>>52495477

[Anonymous No.52495504]

>>52495379
Elons pumping more charts i see

[Anonymous No.52495522]

>>52495490
Based Keep posting

[Anonymous No.52495540]

>>52495444
>>52495477
Cry moar. When Elon fired half of twitter it was useless retards that curate trending topics or trust and safety fag managers.
>>52495471
Wife material

[Anonymous No.52495542]

>>52495504

[Anonymous No.52495546]

working in product is pretty kino, since you basically never get fired unless something really bad happens

[Anonymous No.52495639]

>>52495490
>SOFTWARE DEVELOPERS ARE MORE VALUABLE THAN ANY OTHER PROFESSION ON EARTH WHICH IS WHY I'M PAID $375K A YEAR TO MAINTAIN A DATING APP FOR HIV+ CHILDREN
>OUR SKILLS ARE SO RARE, AND IN SO HIGH DEMAND, THAT WE WILL NEVER FACE A SHORTAGE OF WORK
>THE PRICE OF TECH STOCKS IS IRRELEVANT
>THE AVAILABILITY OF VENTURE CAPITAL IS IRRELEVANT
>THE COST OF CAPITAL IS IRRELEVANT
>OUR SALARIES EXIST AS SEPARATE CONCERNS, OUTSIDE OF THE BOUNDS OF THE BROADER ECONOMY
>REGARDLESS OF ANY HYPOTHETICAL ECONOMIC SLOWDOWN, RECESSION, OR DEPRESSION, WE HAVE ALWAYS AND WILL ALWAYS DRAW 95TH PERCENTILE SALARIES BECAUSE OUR WORK IS ___INTRINSICALLY__ VALUABLE AND REWARDED AS SUCH

[Anonymous No.52495713]

>>52495503
I hate HR so much it's unreal bros
literal leaches

[Anonymous No.52495722]

>>52495471
>>52495540
this isnt proof though

[Anonymous No.52495760]

>>52495639
>NOT REAL ENGINEERS?? WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAT!!!!!!!!!!?????????
>I MADE A TURING MACHINE IN POWERPOINT WHEN I WAS 12! TURING MACHINE! POWERPOINT! 12! DO YOU EVEN KNOW WHAT THAT IS!!!
>OF COURSE THERE ARE NO FORMAL INDUSTRY STANDARDS FOR SOFTWARE QUALITY! SOFTWARE IS TOO DYNAMIC! TOO PROGRESSIVE! TOO COMPLEX TO BE BOGGED DOWN BY SUCH PESKY REGULATION AND BUREAUCRACY!!!
>+1 USER? TRY +1,000,000!!! THAT'S WHAT SOFTWARE MEANS, DIMWIT! THROUGH A COMPLEX SCALABLE SELF-CONTROLLING AUTO-HORIZONTALLY EXPANDING ORCHESTRATION INFRASTRUCTURE COMPRISED OF HIGHLY MODULAR CONTAINERS OF HIGHLY MODULAR MICROSERVICES WE CAN SCALE TO INFINITY AND BEYOND!!! WE CAN MAKE USE OF MORE ENERGY THAN THERE IS IN THE UNIVERSE!!!!!!!!!!! WHAT DO YOU MEAN ANOTHER E-COMMERCE WEBSITE WON'T HAVE THAT MANY USERS???? THAT'S NOT THE FUCKING POINT!!!!!!!!!
>THIS WORLD NEEDS SOFTWARE LIKE IT NEEDS FOOD!!!! DON'T NEED FOOD OR SOFTWARE!!? FINE!!! GO BACK TO AFRICA YOU FUCKING NIGGER!!!!!!!

[Anonymous No.52495767]

>>52495471
To be fair it seems like this one actually does spend most of her day working unlike all of the other whores ITT who just play foosball, do useless meeting and eat tapas at gay restaurants.

[Anonymous No.52495768]

I got 4 words into this deranged diatribe and ignored the rest, still employed, still winning, still coding, you’re still coping

[Anonymous No.52495839]

>>52495760
>YOU IGNORANT FOOL.
>YOU STUPID COW.
>YOU MORONIC PIG.
>DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND?
>YOU DON'T! YOU SIMPLY DON'T UNDERSTAND!
>SOFTWARE CAN SCALE INFINITELY.
>*CLICK CLICK CLACK CLICK CLACK*
>THERE, I JUST WROTE A PIECE OF SOFTWARE.
>A PIECE OF SOFTWARE THAT CAN BE SCALED A TRILLION TIMES!
>THAT'S WHY MY SALARY HAS NO UPPER BOUND.
>BECAUSE MY WORK CAN BE SCALED WITH NO COSTS.
>IT DOESN'T MAT--
>_____IT DOESN'T MATTER_____ THAT I'M AN EMPLOYEE.
>IT'S A NATURAL LAW THAT BECAUSE MY WORK CAN BE SCALED INFINITELY, THAT MY COMPENSATION ALSO SCALES INFINITELY.
>LABOR SUPPLY AND MARKET SATURATION ARE IRRELEVANT CONCEPTS.
>SOFTWARE CAN NEVER BE SATURATED.
>WELL, THAT'S ONLY APPLICABLE AT THE ENTRY LEVEL.
>OKAY, AND MAYBE THE LOWER MID LEVEL.
>BUT IT'S DEFINITELY NOT TRUE AT ALL LEVELS.

[Anonymous No.52495895]

>>52495768
>I WILL NEVER BE FIRED!! NEVER!!!!!
>I AM LITERALLY THE ONLY PERSON IN THE WORLD WHO IS CAPABLE OF DOING MY JOB!!!!!
>EVEN IF I DO DECIDE TO BE LAID OFF, SO WHAT?!?!!? I'LL JUST ANSWER ONE OF THE BILLION MESSAGES I GET FROM RECRUITERS DAILY AND GET HIRED ON THE SPOT WITH NO INTERVIEW FOR A 70% RAISE!!! JOB HOPPING!!! HEARD OF THAT?!?!? PROLLY NOT NON-CODER PISSANT!!!!
>AGEISM??? WHAT IN THE *FUCK* ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?!!!!
>I'LL KEEP MAKING JS WEB APPS EVEN WHEN I'M 80!!!!!!
>EVEN IF I DECIDE TO GET RETIRED AT 40... SO... SO WHAT?!?!!! I'LL HAVE MILLIONS, NO, BILLIONS SAVED UP BY THEN!!!!!
>EVERY LINE OF CODE I WRITE IS LIKE WHAT SPACEX WAS TO THE ROCKET INDUSTRY!!! WHY CAN YOU NOT UNDERSTAND HOW FUCKING VALUABLE I AM?!???!!! CAN YOU REVERSE A LINKED LIST?!!!! CAN YOU REVERSE A BINARY TREE??!?!?! THOUGHT NOT!!!!!!!!!!!

[Anonymous No.52495901]

>>52495713
They are some of the first to go when A company flops though

[Anonymous No.52495941]

do software devs actually say this?

[Anonymous No.52495968]

>>52495639
>>52495490
>>52495429
>>52495379
this is all written by software developers

[Anonymous No.52496010]

Tech bros. We are recession-proof.

[Anonymous No.52496034]

>>52495379
The eternal cope and seethe over IT jobs will never ever get old.
Learn to code.

[Anonymous No.52496051]

>>52495895
Kek this one is actually good

[Anonymous No.52496053]

>>52496034
Code this dick.

[Anonymous No.52496068]

>>52495399
this

[Anonymous No.52496117]

>>52495483
java is fucking disgusting and you should feel bad

[Anonymous No.52496128]

>>52495839
>W-Where have all the recruiters that I ghosted on Linkedin gone...?
>This can't be... There is a WORLDWIDE shortage of CAPABLE software engineers...
>*click click click*
>And... there we are. #OpenToWork. Let the waves flood in, hehe...
>Hmmm... Oh, right, it's lunch time. Oops. Man I miss that Google dinner. Ah well, I suppose the food in Apple can't be that bad, heh? Good one me.
>...
>...
>I-Is it bugged?
>Must be some kind of national recruiter holiday, I-I suppose...
>...
>H-Hey man. How's it going? So, you know, I decided I've maximized my potential at-- I mean yeah I was there for only 4 months but- b-but you know it was a stifling work environment, my boss was pretty toxic... yeah... yeah... so, anyway, I was wondering, do you have any interesting and challenging projects for me at Meta? Man, Zuck sure mucked that one up, I think I can-- Oh. O-Oh. No, all good. No, yeah, no, yeah yeah. Totally. Well, alright then. Let me know if anything opens up. Thanks. Great man. Bye.
>...
>Look, this is exactly the type of thing I have experience in! I'm the guy you want. W-Wait, what? But on the job posting it says... My salary expectations? I don't think it's supposed to-- hello? Hello?!
>...
>...yes. Yes. Fine. I'll do whatever. 60 to 70k.
>...55k?
>nnngggghhAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!
>O-Oops sorry accidentally went on mute there. Yes that sounds terrific! No remote? Terrific! I just love the hustle and bustle of an open space office! I will see you Monday!

[Anonymous No.52496198]

>>52496117
That's C# in Unity flavor

[Anonymous No.52496208]

>>52496198
>winblows
get the fuck off my board
we are foss fanatics here

[Anonymous No.52496212]

>>52495379
Great copy pasta. It’s still funny. Not entirely accurate but funny.

[Anonymous No.52496236]

>>52495713
The HR fags at my job STILL wear masks all day. It’s all so tiresome.

[Anonymous No.52496238]

>>52496208
I use free unity and free blender and free inkscape and free gimp and free vlc and gofuckyourself

[Anonymous No.52496242]

>>52495471
>1:07
>you are just like AH
...yeah, he also had slow and fast weeks.

[Anonymous No.52496260]

>>52495379
Holy fucking gem, if you attached a feral ‘jak to this post it would’ve been the greatest of the month so far

[Anonymous No.52496266]

>>52496238
.. and you make worthless escapism
go fuck yourself, hp lovecrafts kitty

[Anonymous No.52496278]

>>52496266
What other kind of escapism is there
You probably code for an employer lmao

[Anonymous No.52496287]

>>52495895
GEM

[Anonymous No.52496322]

>>52496278
kek never
I have been writing code since 2001 and every line is foss

[Anonymous No.52496339]

>>52496128
fucking kek

[Anonymous No.52496353]

I think most software jobs should be considered a form of pollution, all they do is litter the internet with their garbage.

[Anonymous No.52496359]

>>52496322
Sir this is a business board

[Anonymous No.52496526]

>>52495471
I'm working with a nigress and thought for sure she'd be a complete diversity hire and completely hopeless but she's actually been really good to work with.
She's friendly, timely and competent. You /biz/raelis lied to me.

[Anonymous No.52496531]

>>52496359
>open source isn't a business
what are donations friggot

[Anonymous No.52496542]

>>52496526
Wow, wait a minute...so black people are actually....le based???

[Anonymous No.52496543]

>>52496531
Not worth it

.

[Anonymous No.52496557]

>>52496353
that's great anon but I don't think anyone asked

[Anonymous No.52496580]

>>52496531
You're looking for the /cha/rity board

[Anonymous No.52496599]

>>52495379
>Thinking coding is all about careers

Luxury NEET programmer here. I don't need to make money anymore, but coding allows me to exercise power over the world. The world runs on code, everyone spends all their time plugged into a computing device now, and being able to manipulate it is raw power.

Once you make it, what will you do? Cars, watches, Tinder bitches? Why are you still here, just to consoom?

Coding is how you can make things happen without relying on other people to do everything for you. The old guard needs us, will offer tons of cash, but the secret is we don't need them, and once we have a little, don't need more cash either. We can turn down the cash and build our own shit instead.

[Anonymous No.52496885]

>>52496599
You forgot the >meme arows and the basedjak

[Anonymous No.52497032]

>>52495379
It’s not going to be any better being in a trade or construction with the impeding housing collapse.
This is what happens in recessions. The only safe jobs is unironically the essential worker meme - healthcare, government departments, meteorologists, geologists, ferry captains, street cleaners etc. jobs that actually matter.

[Anonymous No.52497294]

>>52495379
It is overwhelmingly HR and ESG tards tho

[Anonymous No.52497350]

>>52495379
Based.

[Anonymous No.52497731]

>>52496885
Entirely unneeded, learn to code or live your life in impotence.

[Anonymous No.52498639]

>>52495399
Mix. coders can keep coping but there are useless commits.

Top 10x coders just getting lazy means a whole new 3-5 positions. Moment the 10x guys decide to get back to work, shit's re-solved.

[Anonymous No.52498692]

Programmers are about to get Mechanical Engineer’d unfortunately, there’s so many people entering the field

[Anonymous No.52498713]

What's with all these basedjak caps lock posts. This can't be a real person.

[Anonymous No.52498715]

>>52495452
>>52495471
>>52495503
These were the people who were fired. Not competent software engineers. OP can you PLEASE stop sperging out? This is getting out of hand

[Anonymous No.52498838]

>>52495379
Pic related probably similar to IT, just too many non-coding middle managers. Programmers are rare by default, even a pajeet code monkey is 1 in a 1000 in India and they're pushing it very hard over there.

[Anonymous No.52498861]

>>52495379
kek you are seething so hard, how do I know you work minimum wage and have been seething at us code chads working from home for two years straight

[Anonymous No.52498865]

>>52495379
B00kmarked

[Anonymous No.52498958]

If Twitter survives tech workers are so fucked.
Every company will make them work in an office a full 40 hours or fire them

[Anonymous No.52499543]

>>52496212
have a look at these pajeets seething over twitter layoffs on hackernews. the copypasta is more accurate than you think
https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=33647882

[Anonymous No.52499867]

>>52496557
This sounded way funnier in your head (the first time you saw it written by someone else)

[Anonymous No.52499978]

>>52495379
>>52495429
>>52495490
>>52495639
>>52495760
>>52495839
>>52495895
>>52496128
These are really impressive op. Are you typing these up as you go, or did you pre-write them in notepad and just copy and paste whenever your 4chan post countdown gets back to 0? Ps I can't respond too fast because I have to wait for the countdown between posts so please be patient haha

[Anonymous No.52500148]

>>52495379
We get it, you can't code

[Anonymous No.52500490]

>>52495379
Kek, love this pasta because as you read it it becomes more and more obvious it was written by a real CS grad.

[Anonymous No.52500563]

>Learn to co-

[Anonymous No.52500567]

>>52495379
Normies can't understand the thrill of pinning the weasel. Night spent chasing an over amphetamined Caroline around the bean bag forts. Her squealing and gibbering, pouring sweat and on the verge of seizing. Your friends build up an intoxicating, delerious state with Talmudic chantings at the sidelines, hitting the Caroline-toy with brooms if she tries to escape. Sam would be giggling and laughing as the waves of methamphetamine pleasure seem to harmonize with the droning herbrew verses. He runs through the bean bag maze fat and portly, with his viagra powered penis a divining rod for the weasel. Sweat gushing down his face around his unfocused eyes he laughs and chortles until he gasps "Found you!". The Mathsweasel screeches defensively but Wankman Bankman is upon her in seconds. His penis thrusting blindly into her flank, leg, stomach and ribs unconcerned about anything but the motion. Eventually serendepity finds her mouth and the Cocktube Rodent is placated, suckling contently on Bankman's dehydrated dick.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=1vAqaUwLg7g

[Anonymous No.52500570]

>>52500563
if you've ever used these you'd know they don't just make programs for you.

[Anonymous No.52500590]

>>52496599
This. I just studied CS because it's cool as shit, and really is the closest thing we've ever come to inventing magic. Most CS people are fucking insufferable imbeciles looking to write some faggy app or work at a FAGMAN company. The trick is getting a CS degree, then just leveraging it at a normal office job. The ability to automate simple tasks basically puts you at God-tier efficency in most offices.

[Anonymous No.52501422]

>>52495399
This. I work for a growth tech company, as a developer, that has increased from 600 employees to over 900 since I got hired, two years ago. A few weeks ago, they laid off 15% of the workforce. It was almost entirely managerial, HR, and support. Only two developers, new hires on the mobile team, were fired, in the whole company, meaning, of about 135 people fired, only 1.5% of developers were impacted.

Also, everyone fired was given a rather nice severance. With my skills, I'm super high demand. If I got "laid off," I'd just take the severance, then get on unemployment, and enjoy the time off, while looking for new work. Oh, and did I mention two years in the industry, and current pay + benefit matching already at $123k a year? Cope harder, boat misser.

[Anonymous No.52501483]

>>52497032
Yup, I took the govpill three years ago and never looked back.

[Anonymous No.52501509]

codechuds sisters...

[Anonymous No.52502648]

>>52495379
>>52496542

He didnt say that but therea always a few blacks that buck the trend and make ot out of the trap, they are all secretly embarrassed by their brothas and sistas that make life hell in da hood.

[Anonymous No.52502747]

>>52495379
••-•|••-|-•-•|-•- ---|••-•|••-• --|•-|-|•.

[Anonymous No.52502754]

People will have to work a real job eventually. This was never going to last.

[Anonymous No.52502776]

lol you can really see the seething jealousy of the low iq neetoid who couldn’t learn to code itt

[Anonymous No.52502821]

I thought I would enjoy the tech field, couldn't be more wrong. I just think about growing potatoes now, maybe it's not so bad. Potatoes don't make passive-aggressive enails and open tickets.

[Anonymous No.52502938]

Just fucking stop programming already. Sheesh! Nobody needs more buggy ass code.

[Anonymous No.52503240]

>>52502776
>he thinks coding is high IQ
ask me how i know you're a drooling nigger retard who barely passed discrete structures

[Anonymous No.52503281]

Are we witnessing the beginning of the next Zestimate Stacy meme? Are we about to go parabolic in seeing softwarecel posts?

[Anonymous No.52503284]

>>52500590
Yeah. Also I think people don't understand that learning to code filters people in a way that learning other skills doesn't. I have a PhD in molecular genetics and doing the bioinformatics scripting bullshit makes me want to shoot myself, and that's not even real programming. If you can make a computer do what you want without needing a graphical interface to hold your hand, you'll have a major advantage in the market over pea-brained visual learners like me.

[Anonymous No.52503596]

programming was never hard
most self studied field there is can never be "hard"

[Anonymous No.52503774]

>>52495895
fucking lmao these are awesome

[Anonymous No.52504026]

>>52495485
haha you can tell that you're a software engineer lol

[Anonymous No.52504154]

gem thread

[Anonymous No.52504224]

>>52495402
I'm at Meta and some really good engineers got laid off.

[Anonymous No.52504295]

>>52495379
become a cisconigger, then. Pay's still decent.

[Anonymous No.52504322]

>>52495503
This is her making her job seem more important than it is, and she's still useless.

[Anonymous No.52504333]

It's so fucking boring i wanted kill myself, for reall for the first time. Always had this vague dream of working in office and making good salary and i can't do shit it's just to hard, i'm too old, life's too hard. I need several kicks to the face.

[Anonymous No.52504368]

>>52504224
They must not be that great given the dumpsterfire that Meta has been before it was even a concept.

[Anonymous No.52504434]

>>52495379
The great thing about programming is that it filters brainlets. It would literally be impossible for you, and the majority of people you know to replace me :)

[Anonymous No.52504444]

>>52504368
>LITERALLY NO DEVELOPERS HAVE EVER BEEN LAID OFF.
>THE SUGGESTION ALONE IS UTTERLY LUDICROUS.
>WAIT, WHAT'S THAT?
>SOME WERE LAID OFF?
>I REFUSE TO BELIEVE IT.
>YOU HAVE PROOF?
>OH, I SEE.
>WELL, THEY WEREN'T GOOD DEVELOPERS.
>THEY WERE?
>OH, WELL, THAT'S PROBABLY BECAUSE THEY WEREN'T THAT GOOD.

[Anonymous No.52504450]

>>52495379
Kek, coders..

I love this threads

[Anonymous No.52504466]

>>52504434
>IT'S LITERALLY IMPOSSIBLE FOR ANYONE TO UNDERSTAND CONDITIONAL LOGIC AND LOOPS

[Anonymous No.52504487]

>>52495471
Its true. Currently working in Information Security and its the easiest job I have ever had.

Critical system reviews each quarter, a yearly entitlement review for them, saying yes/no to exception requests....its easy as fuck. Getting paid nearly $70k for it and its half remote half in office in a low cost of living area.

We hired a woman who is our Security Analyst who went to college for it. Shes an idiot who routinely displays her incompetence at our monthly meetings. Outright admitting she doesn't know what the metrics she checks mean, but here are the numbers. Its fucking insane, I don't get it, but whatever. My boss knows I coast. I think he coasts too. I guess we're all in on it.

[Anonymous No.52504559]

>>52495379
DOTCOM 2.0 BAYBEE

[Anonymous No.52504596]

>sirs you dont understand heres a chart of our microservices pay me more money

[Anonymous No.52504648]

>>52504434
for (let i = 0; i < 10; i++) {
console.log(i)
>}
>DO YOU KNOW WHAT THAT EVEN MEANS?
>PFFFFT.... I DIDN'T THINK SO, YOU IGNORANT NIGGER MONKEY RETARD!!!!
>THAT IS WHY I AM PAID $375K A YEAR
>BECAUSE THINGS LIKE THESE ARE UNDERSTOOD BY A SELECT FEW -- SOFTWARE ENGINEERS, THAT IS.
>SUPERIOR MINDS, 200 IQ MINIMUM.

[Anonymous No.52504675]

>>52504444
I’m not even a coder you spamming clown, I have no leg in that race. But Meta has been nothing but hot garbage since release and they’re burning billions a month trying and failing to change course. If fucking VRchat is lightyears ahead of Meta then those engineers just flat out suck. All of this is just the tech sector doing a much needed spring cleaning, because people are getting tired of investing in these meme startups that do fuckall but bankrupt within a few years staffed by morons getting 6 figs to do literally nothing.

[Anonymous No.52505763]

>>52495490
As a doctor i'm kekking hard.

[Anonymous No.52506010]

>>52495379
Meanwhile I received a 30% raise which I didn’t even ask for.
T. Literally software engineer.

[Anonymous No.52506041]

>>52504487
Kek. I suggest you all try to keep your jobs because the job market is competitive as fuck right now.

[Anonymous No.52506169]

>>52495452
>10:20 to 4:45
>'work session'

Kek this has to be parody right?

[Anonymous No.52506221]

>>52495379
Lol just learn c and how to use a volt meter and make 80k ez in building automation.

[Anonymous No.52506257]

>>52498838
That... actually makes a lot of sense and it makes your post the biggest anti-fud I've seen around coding

[Anonymous No.52506276]

>>52495452
Damn I wish I was a 7/10 femoid, life in ez mode

[Anonymous No.52506307]

>>52495471
Not a genius but works hard and is trainable. I would keep this employee.

[Anonymous No.52506396]

>>52504487
Same we have 3 women on our team, one white girl is actually pretty smart and good at what she does but the other two are borderline useless/must be diversity hires. I told one of them that sql will probably benefit her in the position and after watching a two hour video she told me she understands sql now and can use it efficiently…… I don’t get anons reeeing about tech layoffs sounds like jealous cope. My company is doing fine and I’m in the same boat as you some weeks are kind of busy but it’s hybrid and typically pretty chill. Our company had record profits this year lol.

[Anonymous No.52507941]

>>52504466
>>IT'S LITERALLY IMPOSSIBLE FOR ANYONE TO UNDERSTAND CONDITIONAL LOGIC AND LOOPS
lol keep coping
You post your quote like it isn't reality, but look around at how most people are essentially genuine retards. They don't even want to read board game manuals.

They don't even know how to speak/think logically in a human language. You think they are about to apply strict logic in a formal language on a daily basis?

Let's also note the fact that most people don't even want to consider any career that involves having to focus for a period of say...2-3 hours in a row. Imagine a normie going through the debugging process.

There's a reason software eng is extremely low nepotism (outside of the non-eng "leadership" shit) with a load of chinks/indians on h1b, despite being highly paid: BASICALLY NOBODY wants to do it and unlike finance which can mostly be bullshitted...you can't just give your cousin a staff engineer role and expect anything to get done.

Also combine all the negatives I mentioned with some of the most continuous ongoing learning + worst interview processes + basically no women (and the women that are there are mostly taking advantage of muh diversity) + there's really no part time; you're on the project or you aren't in almost every case. It's not dentistry where you just take less clients + very likely on-call + having to keep "the system" as a mental model in your head continuously (it's not a discrete event like a car repair) + you don't even get a cool social story at the end of the day because the work is mostly too abstract/boring to discuss briefly + no social

I will say that industry morale and coasting is high, but mostly because everyone in it is sort of burnt out on how shit it is.

t.250k/year southeast asia engineer

[Anonymous No.52508805]

>>52507941
>They don't even know how to speak/think logically in a human language. You think they are about to apply strict logic in a formal language on a daily basis?
this is such a great point that most /biz/raelis don't seem to realize
and keep in mind that the average IQ has been tumbling down since the 1970s

your average zoomie is nearly incapable of manipulating technology in any way that is not immediately obvious, despite spending so much time consuming said technology
the interfaces have all been dumbed down to the lowest common denominator in order to make the highest profit
as a side-effect, zoomies spend 90% of their day engaging in activities that don't require any thinking

[Anonymous No.52508942]

>>52495760
>>NOT REAL ENGINEERS?? WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAT!!!!!!!!!!?????????
I mean, sure because real engineers have gay tests they have to do to get certified. That's fucking stupid. At the same time, you can't tell me a civil engineer is smarter than a "software engineer". Civil are some of the dumbest people ever. Mechnical are dumb too. Electrical are chads though
>>52495490
We do have a shortage, even worse if you fire pajeets
>>52495429
I do get emails from recruiters lmao. Not even applying yet, just letting recruiters slide into my DMs. Over 15 different ones just this week. To be fair, half are contract hourly ones. They are remote and making about $80/hr but still not what I wanna do.
>>52501422
>>52495399
I wish this was the case at my company. They fired alot of dead ends, but some devs like me too. It's stupid because our team was trying to fill a lead, then lost a senior and now lost me, leaving literally only 4 devs, 1 manager, 1 product lead and 1 qa and I was the one who was the expert on our platform that we need to unify out systems and be able to reduce tech debt and dev overhead overally by probably atleast 50-75%
>>52496128
Haha, this is so much coping. Every recruiter that sends me a message is remote and thats all I will ever day. Fuck onsite, waste of my time commuting and I don't care to meet people. Maybe I should, could pay to meet high end connections. Certainly would've saved me from being laid off, because I have a very easy going personality. While I am a good dev, I am a better people person and can cozy up with bosses or coworkers just by being myself, which would've saved my job because they would've loved me too much and at the end of the day, people are all emotional, not logical.

[Anonymous No.52508992]

>>52495379
people that are too lazy to learn to code really are pathetic, stop crying on online forums and get to work

[Anonymous No.52509042]

>>52507941
>continuous ongoing learning + worst interview processes + basically no women
There was a study about burnout in the industry and this is a big part of it. Its not where you learn new skills and can stop after awhile, you always gotta keep learning and keeping up and that actually burns out the quickest learners the most, which worries me since I am one.
>really no part time;
You can reduce your hours worked so you kinda can.
>having to keep "the system" as a mental model in your head continuously
I kinda like this. My old job I got laid off recently, I learned the system and just knew it. I was at my coasting stage. I could do issues super fast and knew the system easily based off work and not studying or stupid bullshit. And I think cars are similar, different models will have different tweaks or shit you gotta remember to be a good mechanic but I get your point about systems can be very different.
>2-3 hours in a row
I personally find this easy, because I only do that and then I'm done for the day. My 2-3hrs is everyone else's 8-10hrs. I say roughly, I estimate out 10 points in a week so about 20hrs a week are spent coding, maybe less actually. Maybe that's just me, but if I"m in the zone, I'm going super fast and get stuff done very easily.

[Anonymous No.52509224]

>>52495379
why are you seething so much? just learn to code

[Anonymous No.52509294]

>>52498838
I'm dubious of that graph. I pay out of pocket for medical stuff in the US and the prices seem really fair if you break it down. $150 for 30 minutes, I see a doctor, that doctor has 2 people working at a desk in the office who need to be paid, and he also needs to be paid. If the doctor is paid 8x the people at the desk:

That's $300 per hour, each desk girl gets $30, doctor gets 250 per hour. Desk people make like 60k a year, doctor makes about half a million, which isn't abnormal if you own your own practice.

[Anonymous No.52509472]

>>52495477
this

expect the most despiseable people to be the ones you meet going in and out of a job

[Anonymous No.52509494]

>>52495452
i mean she worked a decent 5-6 hours there. nothing outrageous

[Anonymous No.52510012]

This is a fucking phenomenal thread.
Please post more like this in the future OP

[Anonymous No.52510055]

>>52495471
She cute

[Anonymous No.52510087]

>>52495379
You do NOT want to code. You want to be the guy supervising a hall dozen coders. Get a BSCS.

[Anonymous No.52510445]

>>52510087
>dozen coders
with the new trends, you'll be lucky if there are more than two coders in the same company, including you

[Anonymous No.52511002]

>>52496359
yes and u are a wagie. get rich or something

[Anonymous No.52511086]

>>52495767
lol i was thinking the same. The beginning seemes to be the usual "working" video but the nubian thot shows something work-related

[Anonymous No.52511135]

>>52496526
>My anecdote disproves statistical trend
Back to l eddit with you, moron

[Anonymous No.52511233]

>work at tech company
>company recently announces cuts
>manager is going to be discussing those layoffs Monday
>been underperforming the last few months
welp, it was nice knowing you fellas. Time to spruce up my resume.

[Anonymous No.52511285]

>>52496526
I’m working with a negress and she seems somewhat slow/clueless and unorganized, even though she has a roman numeral IV after her title (logistics engineer). I really don’t want to think she’s a diversity hire. But the fact that it’s even a question is a tragedy. I would think virtually 100% of black people with any kind of lofty position have had people question whether they got their job through affirmative action.

[Anonymous No.52511698]

>>52507941
Some good points regarding the negatives. I suspect there are more than a few talented people with the potential to be capable programmers who decided they wanted to be Jordan Belfort, not Mark Zuckerberg.

[Anonymous No.52511758]

>>52496010
I don't know what all the fuss is about. I am a senior dev in AdTech. I got my yearly raise, have more interesting and fun work to do and I just turned down a management position because I like being an engineer.

[Anonymous No.52511793]

>>52495471
Banging body. Phew.

[Anonymous No.52511815]

the best part of this thread is that there are actual SWEs posting about how their job is literally impossible

[Anonymous No.52511874]

>>52495471
wtf is wrong with those lips?
Looks like a fkn burn victim

[Anonymous No.52512049]

>>52495379

good engineers have no trouble finding a new job. but being an engineer doesn't make your company immune to sucking.

[Anonymous No.52513804]

Bump?

[Anonymous No.52513865]

>>52495379
can we stop having this faggot thread every day? Im sick of seeing le coding spergout spammed daily by some small pp low IQ retard that cant code. clean it up and permaban the OP spammer

[Anonymous No.52513884]

>>52495444
>>52495484
>>52495722

You prove it niggers. The OP image shows "tech layoffs" but it's not all programmers who work at tech companies you know.