Bear Market Parables

[Anonymous No.49896645]

Then the FED seized Bicoin and led him away, bringing him into the WEF’s house, and /biz/ was following at a distance. 55 And when they had started a thread in the middle of the forum and sat down together, /biz/ sat down among them. 56 Then an eThot, seeing him as he sat in the light and looking closely at him, said, “This man also was a crypto baggie.” 57 But he denied it, saying, “roastie, I do not know it.”

And then Bitcoin turned and looked at /biz/. And /biz/ remembered the saying of Bitcoin, how he had said to him, “Before the rooster crows today, you will deny your investments in me.” 62 And he went out and wept bitterly.

[Anonymous No.49897127]

>>49896645
33 “Hear another parable: There was a certain bagholder who purchased a Bitcoin and set a hedge around it, dug an investment in it and built a portfolio. And he leased it to retail investors and went into a far country. 34 Now when tax-time drew near, he sent his servants to the retail investors, that they might receive its yield. 35 And the retail investors took his servants, beat one, killed one, and stoned another. 36 Again he sent other servants, more than the first, and they did likewise to them. 37 Then last of all he sent his portfolio manager to them, saying, ‘They will respect my portfolio manager.’ 38 But when the retail investors saw the portfolio manager, they said among themselves, ‘This is the heir. Come, let us kill him and seize his gains.’ 39 So they took him and cast him out of the market and killed him.

40 “Therefore, when the owner of the Bitcoin comes, what will he do to those retail investors?”

41 They said to Him, “He will destroy those wicked men miserably, and lease his crypto to other investors who will render to him the yields in their seasons.”

Anon said to them, “Have you never read in the blockchain:

‘The coin which the builders rejected
Has become the chief stablecoin.
This was the Market’s doing,
And it is marvelous in our eyes’?
43 “Therefore I say to you, the means of exchange will be taken from you and given to a hedge fund bearing the yields of it. 44 And whoever falls on this coin will be broken; but on whomever it falls, it will grind him to poverty.”

45 Now when the wagies and gold shills heard His parables, they perceived that He was speaking of them.

[Anonymous No.49897384]

>>49896645
The Parable of the Wise and Foolish Virgins

25 “Then the market of heaven shall be likened to ten virgins who took their crypto and went out to cash the profits. 2 Now five of them were wise, and five were foolish. 3 Those who were foolish took their crypto and took no bond investments with them, 4 but the wise took bond investments in their portfolios with their crypto. 5 But while the profits were delayed, they all slumbered and slept.

6 “And at midnight a cry was heard: ‘Behold, the bear market is coming; go out to meet him!’ 7 Then all those virgins arose and checked their portfolios. 8 And the foolish said to the wise, ‘Give us some of your fiat, for our cryptos are going out.’ 9 But the wise answered, saying, ‘No, lest there should not be enough for us and you; but go rather to those who sell, and buy for yourselves.’ 10 And while they went to buy, the profits came, and those who were ready went in with Bobo to the trade; and the market was closed.

11 “Afterward the other virgins came also, saying, ‘Bobo, Bobo, open to us!’ 12 But he answered and said, ‘Assuredly, I say to you, I do not know you.’

13 “Watch therefore, for you know neither the day nor the hour in which the market of bear is coming.

[Anonymous No.49899703]

>>49896645
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