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2023-11: Warosu is now out of extended maintenance.

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23158197 No.23158197 [Reply] [Original]

>be anon, at work
>need to take a shit
>cool the bathroom is empty, hit up end stall
>it's coming out slow, need to eat more fiber
>playing shitty F2P games on your phone
>feet enter the stall next door
>it's a pair of sandals
>dark brown skin
>you try to hurry up and finish before he gets started, but it's too late

>OHH
>I'M GONNA
>OOOOOOHHHH
>I'M GONNA
>PPFFFFBBBBBBBBBBBBBBT
>SPLATTER
>smell of spicy curry shit fills the bathroom
>POOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOFFFFFFFFTTT
>it sounds like a torrent of liquid shit is shooting out of your neighbor's ass
>you try not to breathe through your nose
>breathe through your mouth instead
>bad choice
>you can almost taste it

>you finally finish up and escape the bathroom
>your eyes are watering
>you check your watch, 9:30 AM
>definitely gonna have to shit again before the end of the day
>steady stream of Pajeets entering the stalls ensures the stink cloud will reach steady state and be waiting for you all day

>> No.23158246

>shitting at 9:30 am
>having to shit again before 5 pm

Eat better

>> No.23158285

>>23158246
more like eat less

>> No.23158340

>>23158197
kekekkekekekekek hahahahahahah anon here's a pro tip take magnesium before bed and then wake up 30 minutes earlier and have a cup of coffee you will instantly empty your bowels there wont be anything left inside you but bones and organs

>> No.23158382

>>23158197
>tfw security guard
>get paid to watch movies, track my stocks/crypto, work on my personal projects, shitpost here, learn to code etc.
>Can be on the toilet for hours at a time if I wanted to
>All I have to do is say "Clear" on a walkie talkie once every 2 hours

>> No.23158453

>>23158382
Use Russian accent like in MGS2.

>> No.23158472
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23158472

>>23158197
Please keep working, we need good workers.

>> No.23158514
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23158514

You can solve this by changing your sleep schedule to get up 1-2 hours earlier. Eat a big breakfast with coffee, maybe some exercise, and your poop schedule will adjust to once a day in the morning.

>> No.23158539

>>23158514
and forgot to mention you can go at home before ever getting to the office