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/biz/ - Business & Finance

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21847868 No.21847868 [Reply] [Original]

When did you realize you grew up in an abusive environment?

>Be me
>Dad yelling all the time during childhood
>Can never talk or have a decent convo with it ending in a lecture or him raising his voice

Didn’t know how bad this affected me till I started actually working. I stutter and spasm like a faggot while talking to adults. Shaky voice and all. I fucking hate it.

How much xrp to escape this piece of shit life.

>> No.21847952

You need to confront you dad. Don't bring up what he did when you were young, that won't help. But the next time he gets loud and angry, you speak slowly and clearly. You don't change your opinion or action because he is angry, you double down. You have to remain clam and logical. If you so this a few times it will fix your problems.

Trust me OP I was in the same exact situation as you before.

>> No.21847967

>>21847868
Comfortably? About 20-25k XRP

>> No.21847995

>how much xrp
0, xrp is trash

>> No.21848016

>>21847868
>When did you realize you grew up in an abusive environment?

probably that time my dad pushed me down a flight of stairs and said he wanted me to leave the family. I was 12. that said, I would never own XRP aka the cripple coin.

>> No.21848049

>I’m slightly uncomfortable

Oh no I was abused and now I’m a puss!

>> No.21848056

>>21847868
sir, this is a bank

>> No.21848066

Literally in the same position with my mother who was a widowed wage slave right to her death and somehow I ended up following the same fate instead of buying chainlink in 2017

>> No.21848090

>>21847952
I've tried that and he just starts screaming louder and being more insulting.

>> No.21848135

>>21847868
My dad used whips, hand restraints, fists and psychology on me until I was 11 and taken into care, sexually abused in there by 2 different people. Found my mother at 14 to get away from care. She was much, much worse. Ended up homeless at 15. I get a full house on ACE test and will die young most likely. Childhood trauma really fucks you up.
Still don't hold XRP though.

>> No.21848162

>>21848090
That's his problem. He only wins if you start getting emotional too.

>> No.21848181

>>21847868
I too had this problem until I beat the shit out of him.

>> No.21848210

>>21847868
>MY DAD YELLING AT ME IS THE REASON I'M A FUCKING FAILURE
LMAOOOO JUST KYS

>> No.21848419

>>21847868

Some people never learn how to be a man. Unfortunately, this lesson is often taught by fathers.

>> No.21848551

>>21847868
About 3 months ago. I'm 32. I think I might actually be retarded without knowing it

>> No.21848586

>>21848551
I'm 43 and only realised a few months ago after a month on the psyche ward.

>> No.21848599

>>21847868
When my Dad woke me up by screaming at full volume 5 feet from 10 year old me because I used the shower floor towel to dry myself because we had no clean towels. My advice is to cut him out.

>> No.21848614

Make fun of his temper tantrums to let him see for himself how stupid his behavior looks

>> No.21848632

>>21848586
I probably should have been there, luckily I don't live in a crowded area so I could get some space

>> No.21848679

If you have issues lads try reading Peter A Levine, Healing Trauma. He's a world leader.

>> No.21848722

>>21847868
>How much xrp to escape this piece of shit life.
you need some VRA anon

>> No.21848753

>>21847868
My old man is like that too. My folks keep yapping away on why cryptocurrencies are scams and I should invest into a 401k instead.

>> No.21848883

>>21847868
>my dad yelled at me, I was abused!
What an absolute faggot. You are too weak to make it, you will always be an impovershed beta male.

>> No.21848948

It takes awhile dude. But you have to fix it or you’ll do it to your kids. My 9 yo is the coolest and best little dude and I catch myself criticizing him all the time. Try meditation, wim hoff (just the free stuff), and guided self hypnosis (Michael sealey on YouTube). I literally have lost jobs because I wasn’t able to respond when someone was criticizing me, even when I was right. Seriously, a job at a white shoe nyc law firm. You will get better, but it sucks.

>> No.21848987

>>21848948
The headspace app is good for meditation.

>> No.21849060

>>21847868
Next time he raises his voice and starts chimping out, coldly lock eyes with him. Don't blink. Okay, fine: blink *once* deliberately while holding your gaze on him. Remain silent. Say nothing until he pauses or prompts you to respond. Then just tell him that he's acting like a fag.

"You're a faggot."

He'll fly off the handle, proving your statement, because such unreasonable emotional harrangues like his are the kind of dumb shit you can expect from women & faggots, but *not* from real *men* like you and the rest of us here on /biz/ are.

If he physically assaults you, kill him in self defense or file a police report on him.

TL;DR: your dad's a fag, and your mom's a cheating whore.

>> No.21849134

>>21847868
Your dad is an asshole, but he sees himself as an alpha and you as a disappointing beta. Unfortunately people like that only respond to one thing and letting him get away with degrading you isn't it.
The only way you're going to get respect from him is to beat the fuck out of him. Until you can do that shit will carry on, time to put up or shut up as they say.
Good luck anon

>> No.21849290

>>21847952
good advice. I grew up the same way. Didn't realize this until a few years ago only in my mid 20's. I decided to just never talk to my family again. It hurts me but I know they don't care.

>> No.21849349

>>21847868
I realized I was growing up in a shit environment when my friends and I were wrestling at my house and I had pinned a friend and my father asked "so you're a tough guy" or something like that. I thought we were having fun and said stupid like "toughest guy here" and he said "lets see". In front of my friends he told me to stand in front of him, he took off his belt and started hitting me with the belt. I'd taken belt beatings before but this time he was extra mean. My friends were in shock and every time I moved he repositioned himself and hit harder. After that he moved to Florida and an hero'd. I think because a friend's parent called the cops. He was psycho and after reading his "journals" I think skitzo. I always knew my childhood was bad and honestly I know a lot of kids had/have it much worse. Adults who hurt children should be punished.

>> No.21849697

>>21848056
lel op btfo'd

>> No.21849725

>>21848135
god damn sum people really are fucked up aren't they?

>> No.21849747

>>21847868
imagine complaining about your dad, half our generation didnt even have one and grew up a in a dogshit section 8 apartment in a nigger ghetto with a single mother

fucking ingrate fags

>> No.21849946

>>21847868
about 17, I normalized it up until then

>> No.21850017

>>21848883
This. Dad yelling is nothing. The real tragedy is divorced couples where the mother becomes the one in charge of male children. It happened to me and once I realized that my “abusive” father (granted he’s a jackass and will throw a small slap here and there which isn’t entirely healthy on its own) was “in the right” from the beginning, I started viewing life differently. Abide by the male principles and your mental illness will disappear. My mom is a fucking controlling, manipulative cunt.

>> No.21850080

>>21847868
Bro, ignore these retards.
You need beta blockers. You can get prescribed them real easily. You'll be able to function like a real human.

>> No.21850084

>>21850017
Giving women the power in courts was responsible for the absoilute state of the world right now.

>> No.21850127

>>21848090
Take out your gun (literal gun) and ask him to suck the barrel. He will feel like a pussy and have to calm down. After that you can never speak with him again but you will be better off.

>> No.21850142

dirty dumb /r9k/ scum

>> No.21850340

>>21850017
bruhhh are you me? like I guess my Mum wasn't that bad before dad left she just cant handle any power or authority so she went berserk on me and my siblings when I was younger. Now I'm older and hold the cards in the family shes nice again. But always scheming. Like jew tier scheming and potting 24/7.

>> No.21850515
File: 290 KB, 1200x600, maui-itinerary.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
21850515

Cut them out, burn bridges, go full on scorched Earth. They will at some point move to financially using/ruining you when they cant emotional abuse you for kicks anymore. Been there and experienced it to the extremes.

Its tough, no contact. Sometimes you might feel ways. Not having a parents for mother's/father's day or for the holidays....but it's the path to true independence. Make your own family, choose your own "family". You owe them nothing.

>> No.21850669

>>21847868
Stop blaming your flaws on your family. Your shit personality is ingrained in your being because that is who you are. It would not matter how you were raised, you would still have turned out like the fuck up you currently are. Another person with your upbringing would have turned out entirely different and it is likely you would still have turned out the same if you were raised by loving and supportive parents. It's just who you are.
You could work on it though, practice talking to people, go to shops and make small talk with the cashiers/waitresses. They will usually go along with it because they are paid for customer service and need to look polite/friendly. You will probably choose not to do this though because it would make you uncomfortable and be 'hard' to do.

>Why do you think some girls from good homes do porn/become prostitutes?
>Why do some men from the slums go on to be hard working adults?

>> No.21850746

>>21850669
stop telling people to stop
you moron

>> No.21850781

>>21850746
You stop telling people to stop telling people to stop.

>> No.21850811

>>21848210
Fucking kek

>> No.21850885

>>21847868
Couple months ago, strange thing is I don't even feel bothered by the fact my mom loved fondling my balls up until I was around 12.
I think I would've wounded up like this regardless of childhood. Some people like me are born to be stepping stones

>> No.21851012

>>21847868
>>21848066
>>21848135
>>21848586
Definition of NPC's. Neither the protagonist or antagonist in their own lives.
>All my problems are caused by others
>Woe is me
>I could have turned out different if other people had acted differently

>> No.21851034

>>21851012
>Neither the protagonist
The protagonist in stories always has to deal with problems outside of their control. You sound like an idiot.

>> No.21851052

>>21847868
Become smarter stronger and financially well off. Should be easy considering how much of a loser the guy is. Cut the guy out of your life and grow up. I think back and found that it took me a bit longer than others to outgrow my autism

>> No.21851111

>>21850017
Pretty much any female figure in my life I was supposed to trust was either manipulative, abusive, or hated me (as I later learned, seems to just be a feature of having autism, all women hating you for *reasons*) and let me know it, so I have no ability to deal with women except in the most professional of capacities.

>> No.21851167

>>21850127
This is the best advice in the thread

>> No.21851305

>>21850669
>>Why do you think some girls from good homes do porn/become prostitutes?
>>Why do some men from the slums go on to be hard working adults?


Because finances aren't what make an emotionally good home. The rich = good meme doesn't actually apply here.

>> No.21851327

>>21851305
That said, it is possible to recover.

I just "woke up" in my mid twenties to have a narcissist mother and enabler father.

>> No.21851346

>>21850127
this

>> No.21851471

>>21849747
I'd almost say a bad dad is worse than none at all.

>> No.21851522

>>21848090
Remove him from your life then. There's no reason to put up with that behavior.
>hurr durr blood is thicker than water, it's your family
no.

>> No.21851534

>>21847868
>When did you realize you grew up in an abusive environment?
When I noticed how I was the only one who instinctively flinched any time an unexpected movement caught my attention.

>> No.21851626

>>21848948

All of our parents were cucked indentured slaves and not masters of their own lives.
This leads to anger and insecurity on a deep level.
They can't help take it out on their kids, because they are weak.

Not entirely their fault, modern society is designed to enslave people.

At least we have the internet and can get access to answers about life. What did our parents have? Their local neighbourhood?

>> No.21852145
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21852145

>>21847868
That's fucked.

>> No.21852157

Cry about it lol

>> No.21852185

>>21847868
>XRP
lmao never gonna make it

>> No.21852255

>>21848599
My dad did the same this after I used his card to buy in app purchases. I would be annoyed as well but ffs I was 12.

>> No.21852265

When I got old enough to hit back...

...but the abuse carried over to all my schools from both students and teachers, so I'm permanently broken.

>> No.21852282

>>21852255
Mum is also an alchoholic.

>> No.21852304

>>21852282
Fuck I also haven't done my work for uni and am having suicidal thoughts. Want to drop out, at least for a little bit.

>> No.21852310

I'll remember to not yell at my kids.

>> No.21852316
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21852316

>>21847868
Grew up the same way, I'll obviously live to my full potential because of it, but I was still a CEO of a company for 3 years before deciding it's not worth the energy.
I have a family and kids now, and I bought 55k LINK during ICO, holding 25M RSR at the moment.
Good on you for having self awareness, but you should put an end to your victim mentality as early as possible. I wasted almost a decade suffering because of the past, and it's just that - time wasted. Try your best to move on, OP.

>> No.21852324

>>21852304
Jesus Christ I'm a weak faggot.

>> No.21852351

>>21851012
>>21850669
Low IQ people with no concept of cause and effect.
Upbringing and environment have a huge effect on personality which is why the kids or intelligent and wealthy people usually turn out well. Those people don't abuse their kids and know how to raise them.

>> No.21852361

>>21847868
beat up your dad

>> No.21852371

>>21851012
yeah just walk in a give the manager a strong handshake
ok boomer

>> No.21852377

>>21852316
>I'll obviously NEVER live to my full potential because of it
*

>> No.21852394

It's been 20 years since it all stopped, but I still wake up with the nightmares.

I've been seeing both a therapist and a psychologist for over 15 years, and still I can't get better.
I even had electroshock therapy.

People can really permanently break you...

>> No.21852494

>blaming others for your problems
>constant victim
>going to ((therapy))
>larping you beat up your Dad
all of you are summerfag redditors kys

>> No.21852542

>>21851012
>>21850669
>t. People that grew up in high middle class suburban neighborhoods with their worst childhood memory being having to go to sleep withojt being able to play on the n64 for their daily 30minutes of playtime

>> No.21852555

>>21852494
>>21850669

libertarians are so cringe it's unreal

>> No.21852571

>>21852494
Making fun of other peoples pain is going to get you shot some day.
You know nothing about other peoples situations.
I know for a fact that if you said that to my face I would snap and shoot you.
Never going to be a victim again.

>> No.21852627

>>21852255
Nah I had an abusive dad, but I wouldn't dare to do that at that age. My gf with a really close supportive family ran up a phone bill at that age and got shouted at a lot, you deserved that one.

>> No.21852659

>>21852351
They still abuse them. Sometimes worse, shit like forcing them to choose a career as a doctor etc.

>> No.21852680

>>21847868
I was 6 years old and i broke the hanf of my sisters abusive bf that was like 25 yo by slamming the door. He tried to kill me for a few days throwing bricks through the window.

I only found out recently that apparently i have complex PTSD and forgot LARGE chunks of my childhood. I found this out because i was talking to my psychiatrist and mentioned the early childhood ptsd and he looked at my medical history and started reading for like 20 minutes. And then did an obvious lie of " o it doesnt really say here why you got ptsd" just to not retrigger memories.i am beyond fucked anon

>> No.21852728

>>21852659
Statistically they are way less likely to abuse them in a way that turns them into deadbeats.
Most know how important it is to instill confidence and wouldn't just randomly best them or shout in a fit of drunken rage.

>> No.21852757

>>21847868
Forgive your parents, you know how you do things you dont want to do and then again anyway. Go and forgive then come back and make money. Because what they did to you was wrong, but it is more wrong for you to resent them (because that actually affects you)

>> No.21852763

>>21847868
I was locked in a car for 3 hours once age about 10 and developed claustrophobia as a result. Struggle with public transport or anything where I have to relinquish control of my movements.

>> No.21852766

>>21848090
Tell him to stop getting all emotional like a woman. If he still doesn't stop then, bust him in his fucking mouth. If he's bigger or stronger than you, pick up a 2x4 or something and level the playing field.

>> No.21852779

>>21852757
If you go and forgive it will be the last time you >>21847868 ever shake in your boots

>> No.21852802

Probably recently sometime this year since I've had about a dozen dreams about my dad trying to kill me lol

I bet he wonders why I don't call him, fuck you dad you yelled at all the time for no reason and beat me with a cane until I was 17.

>> No.21852805

>>21848090
The best answer is to literally fight your dad. Punch him. After the fight he will like you more. Don’t listen to these pussies that say you should cut him off entirely. You and your dad are in a cosmic struggle as he ages and weakens you can abuse him to the same extent he abused you. Good parenting is about recognizing the duality of the parent child relationship. American boomers in particular are abusive because they do not believe they will rely on their children for eldercare(they will)

>> No.21852836

>>21848614
This also works too but be prepared to have a small physical altercation if you go this route

>> No.21852873

>>21852555
Libertarians are the worst. Childish morons

>> No.21853030

>>21850017
I know this feel

>> No.21853069

>>21848090
You don't owe him anything

Check out Stefan molyneux

Freedomain.com

>> No.21853095

>>21847952
I did this but then he saw what i was trying to do, smiled and then whacked me on the head, bent me over and fucked me.

>> No.21853113

>>21853069
Stefan is a scam artist and cult leader. DEFOO is manipulative and toxic. Literally just fight your dad like humans have done for 1000 years then you will be a man

>> No.21853132

>xrp
guess op will eternally wage cuck

>> No.21853172
File: 168 KB, 1500x821, based_advisor.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
21853172

>>21852805


Become abusive because your parents were abusive.

>Yeah that tactic never fails

>> No.21853229

>>21853172
OP has anxiety and nervousness due to an abusive dominance relationship with his dad. Pussies will tell him to medicate therapy blah blah but his monkey brain just wants him to fight his monkey dad and then they can love each other again. If he truly transcended then yeah it’s better not to fight but at the end of the day his dad caused this, fighting him is a morally acceptable and pragmatic choice.

>> No.21853297

Parents used to be really abusive, was always the quiet child getting shit on by the entire family. Family gets into financial problems and I end up being one of the only people in the family with a proper job.

Because my clout got bigger and they are now dependant on me for small handouts ever so often.

I psychologically torture them and set them up against each other all the time now.

Who else here became a villain?

>> No.21853373

>>21847868
My dad was the same but I learned to eat the instability and made friends in highschool because I'm not a whiny fag. Reconcile with your pops and make something of yourself you little bitch

>> No.21853377

>>21852571
You are such a faggot, you wouldn't even be able to mutter a word to my face. I would bitch slap you then do a 360 and walk away.

>> No.21853403

>>21847868
White people are such trash

>> No.21853537

>>21847868
Not abusive, just extremely dysfunctional.
>Going to pick up Dad from the airport
>Haven't seen him in over six months
>Kind of excited
>He ignores me and my sisters as usual
>Sister loses it in car on the way home
>Repeats over and over the same demand to visit a family friend
>Mum starts crying, pulls car over, and runs down the street
>Everyone else sits there in the car like nothing happened
>Realise nobody is going to do anything
>Run down the street after her and walk her back to the car
I was probably ten or eleven. Don't remember it at all. But it is never one thing. It is repetition, and single events become irrelevant.
Sisters became suicidal as they got older. And now I post on 4chan. But it isn't the dysfunction that counts. It's the decisions you make going forwards.

>> No.21853549

>/biz/ - Business & Finance

>> No.21853660

>>21847868
A few books that might help:
The Courage to Be Disliked
The Body Keeps the Score
The /biz/ Guide to Trading LINK

>> No.21853983

>>21850017
Both of your parents are shitty.

>> No.21854317

>>21851111
anon idk if your gonna read this but this is good advice. I have a light aspergers. I look and act normal I just say something every now and then that takes people off guard and I spend the new few weeks thinking "should not have said that should not have said that". I'm doing well-ish in life and fairly normal looking - gym and all.
But femoids could pick it in me a mile away, I don't know how. For so many damn years of my life they were like homing missiles. No matter how hard I worked out or how good I looked, no matter where I went, how nice or rude I was. Talking lots or not at all. They could never voice it, just "reasons" or something similar.
They would go out of their way to physically attack me I'm not fucking kidding, to frame me, set me up, lie about me. From school to uni to job they were relentless. There was a woman at my cashier job in uni who I never really talked to, one day she just walks up to me and squirts dishwashing liquid in my fucking eyes. I had to go to the hospital, a week later another female there came up behind me with a knife to my throat. This type of stuff was quite common.
I fucked a few of the girls at work and in uni, but even as I was fucking them I knew they hated me. They just liked my body.

The autism has a threshold or level cap however once you surpass it the hate goes away. I know what its like when they can see it in you. How they act, how guys lesser than you are loving life living the dream while they are attacking you never giving peace. Everything you do is offensive.
Don't quit fellow autistic anon. Work out, eat well, get educated and build your life.
Women work on a threshold thing with men, they hate them when they are under a certain level.
For you and me that level is just higher than other men. Once you cross that line its like it never existed and they are good to you, treat you like any other guy doing well in life.
Admittedly you will be quite the sadistic bastard by then. Just push through.

>> No.21854351

>>21850669
>education doesnt matter
at this point don't even waste time to proper educate your son, it will turn out like he is, right? hope you are trolling or something

>> No.21854574

>>21847868
leave

>> No.21854608

>>21851111
>so I have no ability to deal with women except in the most professional of capacities.
Checked and. I am the opposite i can literally only flirt with women all the time never anything serious. Has gotten me into a lot of trouble

>> No.21854792

>>21852805
This, don't beat him to a pulp though, a threat of violence worked for me.
Now every time he starts getting angry whilst doing anything I just give him the stinkeye and he calms down

>> No.21854861

>>21852728
you have no idea what you're talking about, and should probably stop posting about it.

>> No.21854906

>>21854792
Give him another chance once he no longer acts like a little faggot.
Billy Burr has a good story about this shit, I recommend you check it out,
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S8Ho1WWDECM

>> No.21854952

>>21847868
What is that stupid face the slut wojacks make anyways?