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/biz/ - Business & Finance

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21830986 No.21830986[DELETED]  [Reply] [Original]

i accidentally showed this woman i work with my penis in the break room and now i think im going to get fired

wat do i do?

im also holding 10MM RSR so i think i'll be okay financially if i do lose my job.

>> No.21831013

>>21830986
kek, "accidentally" Enjoy the ride, smooth brain.

>> No.21831022

how the fuck do you accidently show your dick

>> No.21831032

>>21830986
Sent a dig pic to her and share with us her reply

>> No.21831036

>accidentally
let me guess, you played it up like you have a huge cock, and she said she wanted to see it; so you showed her your tiny pecker and she laughed you out of the room
don't worry anon, you won't get fired, you'll just get ridiculed until you snap and shoot up your office

>> No.21831045

>>21831022
i need to know

>> No.21831049

>>21830986
Why the fuck did you have your cock out in the break room you retard

>> No.21831076

>>21831032
*DICK mofo

>> No.21831087

>>21831036
this is basically what happened and i have an avg dick but she was really shocked when i pulled it out. i think she was just joking with me but she basically ran out of the room. it happened about 2hrs ago and i think im going to have to talk to the boss before today is over im not sure. still waiting

>> No.21831088

ive accidentally shown my dick a few times. dont worry anon, unless youre black, then youre probably facing 2-5 years for sexual assault

>> No.21831089

>>21830986
Troll,
Even dumb asses are smarter then this

>> No.21831103

>>21831036
Why can cringelords never help their wild fantasies

>> No.21831127

How do you accidentally your dick

>> No.21831321

>>21831036
>>21831087
Holy fuck, my sides

>> No.21831391

>>21830986
Tell your female colleague that you're sorry, and that you have autism and only thinks literally about things.

>> No.21831417

Well if you tuck your dick inbetween your legs and when the time rolls around you can claim that you dont even have a benis and show tour boss by pulling down your pants.

>> No.21831452

>>21831087
never self-incriminate

>> No.21831497
File: 1.99 MB, 448x252, 1597949665527.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
21831497

>>21831087
I refuse to believe anyone is this autistic

>> No.21831573

>>21831452
so what this would be like indecent exposure or something like that? so its a misdemeanor right? i could just get probation right?

>> No.21831588
File: 27 KB, 343x375, 13F057A8-518F-40B4-82DD-C4891A7A9D07.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
21831588

>>21831087
Top fucking kek this board really is full of the biggest spergs

>> No.21831615

>>21830986
>10MM RSR
Damn bruh, why even wageslave?
Take a loan, you're already guaranteed to make it.

>> No.21831707

>>21831573
have you thought about just quitting?

>> No.21831806
File: 1.75 MB, 306x205, 1597772329897.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
21831806

>>21830986
>>21831087
>>21831573
This is the kind of specimen who holds RSR

>> No.21831868

>>21831707
that would save me the whole getting fired thing on my employment record.
thats a smart move. thanks anon i'll write up my resignation right now

>> No.21831908

>>21831573
firstly was she hot or did you just lose your senses? what’s the backstory?

>> No.21831967
File: 56 KB, 800x804, 1572708206492.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
21831967

>>21831087

>> No.21832114

don't worry OP what you did was completely justified and normal, social behavior. You won't face any consequences for this, it's expected Heck, I showed 3 co-workers my dick and balls this morning.
You're fine.

>> No.21832125

>>21831087
Dude, you're making us other autists look bad. We need more temple grandins instead of this shit

>> No.21832129

>>21831868
If I were you, I would try and have a 1 on 1 with the girl first... and tell her your concerns, say you didn't realize that she was joking and you have remorse for your actions. If you really want to resign, it might be best to give her notice that you know you have potentially created a "hostile work environment" (the verbiage of sexual harassment training seminars) for her, and you think it's best if you quit. All this raises the chance that she doesn't go to HR, and you can maybe walk away from this without some stain on your record. But none of us know this girl, so we can't say what she'll do. Penises don't belong out at work. What you did is definitely sexual harassment. Hopefully you can resolve the situation. Good luck bro.

>> No.21832189

>>21832114
kek

>> No.21832234

>>21832129
this is the real answer OP

>> No.21832255

damn dude i hope you dont get labled as a sex offender. im pretty sure if you go to jail theyre gonna try to kill you

>> No.21832258

>>21830986
So how did you end up with your penis out in the break room?

>> No.21832291

>>21831088
lmao I went to high school with a black guy who got suspended for whipping his dick out. that man now plays for the NFL.

>> No.21832378
File: 86 KB, 455x675, A8B31CCC-6C43-4384-90FB-715F47A0677C.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
21832378

>>21830986
Lol this is the best thread I’ve seen on 4chan in quite a while

>> No.21832395

Just deny it dumbass

>> No.21832474
File: 250 KB, 736x960, 1595903287594.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
21832474

>>21831573
Did anyone else see? Are there cameras? You may be able to lie your way out of it. Just tell them you pulled a prank where you stuck your thumb through the zipper of your pants. It was just a joke, and it wasn't really your dick. If she was really freaked out and immediately ran away, she might not have gotten a good look, and even if she did, you just have to convince everyone else you pranked her. Might be a long shot, but I don't see any other option, other than just flat denial.

>> No.21832483
File: 55 KB, 640x330, didnthappen.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
21832483

>>21830986

>> No.21832587

>>21831087
dude what lmao

>> No.21832729

>>21832129
No no no

There is only one way.

Deny everything. Act weird. Tell HR she asked you out and you declined (since you don't believe in dating in the workplace) and she made a big fuzz about it and talked about getting revenge.

>> No.21832959

>>21832729
yeah if you're a psychopath who can lie like that go for it
most people can't pull that shit off

>> No.21833073

>>21832959
yeah autists are not really good a lying
and OP clearly is one

>> No.21833272

>>21832729
It all depends how risk averse, and ethical OP is. If OP is not risk averse, then just leaving things as they are is good. In that case if she complains, if OP is not ethical, he can do what you say and lie/deny or flip the story. If OP is risk averse, he'd at the bare minimum discuss the topic with her and express remorse, at the maximum quit after expressing remorse. I think at least having a 1 on 1 with her is the most ethical thing to do as well, because women are not like men. If some decent looking girl pops her tits out at work we'd be super excited. It's different for men whipping their dicks out at work in front of a woman.

>> No.21833404

>>21832959
If she asks for showing you your cock you shouldn't get fired about it. Yes your lying but it's because a situation she created and she is the one who wants to fuck you over

>>21833272
Don't talk about it, what if she is recording the session? Then your definitely fucked . Don't mention it ever again. If your lucky she will just think she asked for it her self and stops talking with you about it. It will be awkward af for the next view years.

>> No.21834046

You have to seduce her. I know it's a long shot for an autist like you, but this is your only way out. You need to double-down and follow through. Once you're up in her guts, she'll forget all about it. Hell, it might even turn her on thinking about what an alpha you were (in her mind) to show her your cock.

>> No.21834165

>>21832291
Give us a name

>> No.21834228

>>21832291
i knew a black guy who smacked a girls ass in panama city beach FL. she was at a club at 1am. she ended up was there illegally @ 17 years old. her dad was prosecutor of florida. he went to prison for 18 months. never came back to college from spring break

>> No.21834286

>>21834046
this may be your only chance OP

>> No.21834448

>>21832129
Vroooooo don’t do this what the fuck just forget it happened and act normally

>> No.21834499

>>21830986

put severance check all into STA

>> No.21834547

>>21834046
This op. Your only chance is to not be a Sperg for once and seduce her practice in front of the mirror at work where she can see you. She will think it's cute that you are trying so hard to date her. Put on your best clothes and come up to her preferably while she's on lunch break talking to her friends. She'll think it's ballsy of you to ask her out in front of her social group. Maybe say something like "Come with me to the bowling alley after work, and you may get a closer look of what I showed you in the lounge." This creates an inside joke between the two of you, forming a sense of familiarity between you. Good luck OP this is your only chance.

>> No.21834558

>>21832729
I say go to HR first and accuse her of sexual harassment for asking to see ur dick / talking about ur dick etc.

If possible to deny pulling it out (ie she is sole witness / no cameras) then do so. Otherwise, tell them she's lying and she was the one who initiated the harassment

>> No.21834717

>>21831087
maybe you can convince hr you're a retard and theyll go easy on you

>> No.21834753

tell the boss she was inappropriately advancing on you and you rebuffed her. say she was trying to grab your dick and unbutton your pants and you were scared and confused and pushed here away

its time to out SJW the SJWs. you need to cry rape OP

>> No.21834757

>>21832729
this, you career is already over, might as well give it a go.

>> No.21834848

Give me your rsr so they don't take it when she sues you

>> No.21835205

I just finalized my resignation letter and gave it to my boss.
My official 2 weeks notice is in.
But I stipulated that due to concerns over COVID19 that I won't be coming into the office tomorrow and cannot fulfill the full 2 weeks.

Thanks anons for helping me dodge this bullet.
And i'll just deny it like a few of you suggested.

>> No.21835280
File: 275 KB, 957x931, 1569696233365.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
21835280

>>21831087

>> No.21835387

>>21831087
If your boss mentions it just show him your dick too.
Then do a 360 and moonwalk out preferably with a raging erection.

>> No.21835411

>>21835205
retard

>> No.21835410

>>21834046
This

Don’t go to your boss and don’t mention or speak about this to the girl she might be recording you.

Act alpha as fuck and try hooking up with her but never mention it again

>> No.21835486

>>21835205
Why the hell did you quit? For all you know, she might have not said anything

>> No.21835520

What if she actually liked you and you quit for no reason?
You could keep your job and have a cutie. Plus the girl will think you are an autistic for quitting randomly.
Why didn't you just talk to her and work things out, seduce her or be her friend?

>> No.21835531

>>21831087
and then the penis clapped

>> No.21835575

>>21832129
super gay. don't dig yourself in further
>>21834448
only reasonable way forward

>> No.21835587

>>21831022
this. until this is answered there is no going forward

>> No.21835725
File: 269 KB, 646x595, pepe_sweating2.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
21835725

>>21835205
>WHAT? she said i showd my dick to her in the bathroom?? i can assure you i did nothing like that officers!
>w-why i quit that afternoon and never went back to the office again? iiiii-it is completely unrealted to the accustation! i-i ASSURE you!

>> No.21835806

>>21835520
based on op's comments and behavior, it's quiet possibly for the better she leaves and never goes back. if that woman said nothing, she probably would if op tried what you suggest. it would only work for men with chad personalities.

>> No.21835817

>>21831087
That is the opposite of accidentally. If you don't know basic word definitions, perhaps you are underqualified for whatever your job is anyway.

>> No.21835951

>>21832729
This could work if there aren't cameras. But OP may be too dumb to pull it off.

>> No.21835957
File: 490 KB, 722x496, 1597778851910.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
21835957

>>21832378
>Lol this is the best thread I’ve seen on 4chan in quite a while

This larp is magnifique.
RSR. We have the best hodlers, don't we folks?
RSR

>> No.21836052

>>21831573
If you're white then you're finished.

>> No.21836053

>>21830986
I have accidentally a few times myself.
I find it best to just move to a new job. They going to fire you anyway, but at new job is new girls to accidentally.

>> No.21836254

>>21831087
kek
well she was asking for it I guess.

>> No.21836524

>>21830986
At least change the fucking stoey next time shilligan. This stupid fucking thread was up a month or so ago exact same story shilling your stupid fucking coin, still made me laugh tho.

>tl;dr dont buy RSR. Trade for $ERD

>> No.21836561

He meant “accidentally” like a catholic priest

>> No.21836591

>>21836053
This post is a work of art. thank you anon