200+ applications, no responses.. how the FUCK do people get jobs?

[Anonymous No.11934562]

I have to get a job until crypto recovers to pay rent and I've been applying for the past 3 weeks.

Literally zero bites so far, not even a phone call. What the FUCK? How do people do this? Resume attached, should I just start making shit up?

[Anonymous No.11934584]

>>11934562
>Interests: Anime

[Anonymous No.11934594]

>>11934562
Why did you include the ticker symbols for the companies you worked for? Lol

[Anonymous No.11934597]

>>11934562
1. Half your additional info is cringe, change that.
2. I only see work experience, you need make some space for activities you do, maybe a competition you joined, ect
3. Add some color to this

[Anonymous No.11934598]

you get a job by having connections, ask your friends, family and go to a recruitment agency

[Anonymous No.11934599]

>>11934562
Putting [company name confidental] makes you look like a creep.

“Cash management specialist” is a retarded autist way of saying lazy cashier.

Be honest and blow up your resume in other ways.

I read of the [company name confidential] just put volunteer work or put up a freelancing website so they don’t ask too many questions.

>Japanese
>Anime
>Video Games
Lmfao

Just realized this was bait.

7/10 for getting me to respond seriously.

[Anonymous No.11934609]

Your resume is garbage why the fuck do you have so much filler spaces between each field.

Also who the fuck puts their high school on their resume if they have a college degree.

Clearly you didn’t go to Yale you fucking larper

[Anonymous No.11934611]

lmfao this, what the fuck OP?

[Anonymous No.11934618]

>>11934611
meant to quote >>11934594

[Anonymous No.11934622]

nice repost
roll bread

[Anonymous No.11934636]

>>11934562
>Anime, Manga, ESports, Twitch...
Oh Anon, are you even trying?

[Anonymous No.11934647]

>>11934562
put the name of the company you redacted, makes you look like you were fired so hard you dont want anyone to know how it happened remove NYSE tickers, DELETE anime, manga, skipping rope crap
use a template that has bright colours, learn to write interesting 2 paragraph cover letter to add to the application

god speed, anon

[Anonymous No.11934654]

>those interests
REEEEEKS of autism

[Anonymous No.11934660]

>>11934562
Obviously this is a troll, but don't include your interests especially if they are that shameful. Don't put ticker symbols or made up job titles/exagerated descriptions. Definitely don't list a job and tell them you only worked there for 1 month or they will (rightfully) assume you're terrible.

[Anonymous No.11934681]

>>11934597
1&2 are good advice, but don't add color that's childish. There are other ways to make a resume stand out, like good typography or interesting design.

t. Graphic designer

[Anonymous No.11934690]

>>11934562
>company name confidential
I love reading bullshit when I'm looking to fill a position.

[Anonymous No.11934714]

>>11934597
>1. Half your additional info is cringe, change that.
>3. Add some color to this

>>11934647
>use a template that has bright colours, learn to write interesting 2 paragraph cover letter to add to the application


What do you mean by this? I'm not very creative with colors or design. What templates do you recommend?

[Anonymous No.11934726]

>>11934681
Maybe, I've found adding a little bit of color helps. Could also be that I was entry level, so much more applicants for each role, colors help in that case I'd think. Prob right about more serious roles

[Anonymous No.11934755]

>>11934562
>those interests
No, please God tell me this isn't real.

[Anonymous No.11934828]

>>11934714
Something as simple as this:

https://templates.office.com/en-us/Simple-resume-TM00002110

All I ever did was change the headers like that to get a little attention. Don't go too hard on the looks, keep it simple. I made that mistake once, and lost my interview with Tesla as a result (got it, then lost it, not gonna bother and explain).

[Anonymous No.11934834]

>>11934584
>>11934599
>>11934636
>>11934654
>>11934755
What the hell are you supposed to put for interests? Don't companies want to see what you do outside of work so you stand out as an interesting person?

What, am I supposed to put fake shit like traveling, cooking, photography, woodworking?

[Anonymous No.11934858]

This is bait

[Anonymous No.11934880]

>>11934562
I wouldn't hire you to mop my shit.

[Anonymous No.11934895]

>>11934834
>having an ‘Interests’ section on your resume

Obvious bait but I’ll bite

Absolute topkekkery. No employee cares about your interests. Try the Indeed Template. It’s gotten me several jobs over the last few years.

[Anonymous No.11934899]

LOL @ all the newfags replying to this sincerely

[Anonymous No.11934911]

>>11934895
Employer*

[Anonymous No.11934922]

>>11934899
I think most of the anons here know it’s obvious bait, but there are unironically people on here that believe a resume is supposed to look like this.

Sometimes you gotta have fun with the bait. It could help autists.

[Anonymous No.11934930]

>>11934834
I wouldn't fake shit, I'd just put less. Like, instead of skipping rope I'd put 'fitness', and I would totally take out Twitch, Youtube, Netflix and imageboards -
Twitch, Youtube, Netflix and 4chan, as much as I love using them, they're wastes of time. They're things we do to make the day pass. You wouldn't put "Watching TV" as an interest. It's like putting "breathing" as an interest. There is literally nothing of substance there.
Anime and Manga is also difficult - anime is a whole genre with its own respectability and all that, but it's also a genre where you can literally, literally binge watch seven hundred episodes of a show and get nothing of substance. So I'd take that out,
Instead of Manga I'd put 'Reading', just sounds better, makes it seem like you read more outside of like Bleach and Death Note.
Leaving in Video Games is okay, I think,
And cryptocurrencies is okay, yeah.

"Conventions" is a bit shit too.

So I'd leave it at Fitness, Reading, Video Games, Cryptocurrencies. You really don't need anything else, and as it currently is you're advertising yourself as someone who wastes a LOT of time.

[Anonymous No.11934995]

>>11934930
Thanks, yeah it does make sense trimming it down a bit. Appreciate the constructive criticism anon

[Anonymous No.11935081]

>>11934995
No worries man. Someone suggested the indeed resume, that’s probably a great shout, I’m using the Novoresume template right now which has more colour and looks really snappy like you put lots of effort into it when really you’ve done fuck all. It does require your photo though, maybe that’s just a European thing.

[Anonymous No.11935255]

>>11934995
Take interests out all together. No employer cares or gives a shit.

This isn't a game anymore, this is real life. Start acting professional.

I'd also completely remove gamestop and that property management job. It's a huge red flag you're working 3 jobs concurrently.

[Anonymous No.11935280]

>falling for this

[Anonymous No.11935282]

>>11935255
>I'd also completely remove gamestop and that property management job. It's a huge red flag you're working 3 jobs concurrently.

That's my experience. What else am I supposed to put there?

[Anonymous No.11935319]

>>11934562
LOloLOloLolO
>Interests: anime, manga, video game, esports, imageboards
so... there you have it, that's why no one's hiring you

[Anonymous No.11935323]

>>11934562
>Fund manager
aka your shitcoins
>property manager
aka you're renting out part of a house
>interests
lel

top keks aside you need to try to meet these people in person and speak with them directly prior to an interview about how you saw the job and wanted to stop in to greet them. Other than that, exhaust your connections to find a job for you.

[Anonymous No.11935366]

>>11934562
I would never hire an anime faggot.

[Anonymous No.11935403]

>>11934562
>Assisted clients in making informed decisions
Trash. The reason why you got no responses is because it's too generic: try to tell a story of success and how you did great things in your previous positions.

No one gives a shit about that, what you should say instead is how your work made tons of shekels to the company.

> Met and complied with legal regulations
This is so fucking vague... what regulations?

Remember to give some numbers and remove the shitty "Interests" section.

[Anonymous No.11936572]

>>11934562
People want to see you can get a job and KEEP IT. I’d value a janitor more that showed up everyday on time with 10+ years than a Yale graduate who works at GameStop for 1 month then quits and tries Walmart.

You need to start personally talking to the owner of the business. Having a lot of jobs looks worse than having one job and sticking to it.

Find a job but then start your own business. Also hope you bought link.

[Anonymous No.11936581]

Just don't be fat and ugly

[Anonymous No.11936618]

>Interests: Anime, Manga

This has to be a joke right?

[Anonymous No.11936639]

>>11934562
>Lie.s about being a fund manager and a property manager.
>Worked as a cashier at Wal-Mart and Gamestop.
>Went to Yale so probably has rich parents .
Did I miss anything?

[Anonymous No.11936674]

>>11934834
Well, maybe it wasn't a joke and maybe you truly are THIS autistic. Nobody wants anime sperglords who don't understand other humans working for them. You literally just told them you're a gigafaggot hentai jerking, e-celeb fawning fucking cancerous retard. You shouldn't even have a job. I hope someone who's less of a disgusting loser gets whatever jobs you try to apply for.

[Anonymous No.11936777]

>everyone falling for the obvious bait

[Anonymous No.11936837]

>>11934562
My main office is over in Vancouver WA. Heh, small world. I know that area well.