/biz/ - Business & Finance

>>3596678
Escalator Step Stools, they'll make me the first billionaire.

>>3596698
explain. what are they? how would you make them?

>>3596678
I have an idea for a niche porn site. I do have experience programming and operating websites so I have the skillset to get it going, I'm just unsure if theres a demand.

My idea was a site where straight guys are tricked into sticking sharpies and spoons up their ass. Itd be like people would offer them something like money in exchange for them doing it with a timestamp and theyd do it but get nothing in return.

I dont anticipate any real costs involved I just dont know how big the demand is for something like this.

smart dog bowl
alerts the app on your phone when its empty

>>3596716
They are like escalators, but in the size of a step stool. I will recycle used escalators from shopping centers going out of business because of Amazon, by cutting them up into smaller escalators roughly the size of step stools. This way, I am both a green company for government kick backs and piggy back on the bestest company in the world known as Amazon who can provide the supply and then distribute my product.

>>3596742
So they are the size of step stools and work like escalators?

>>3596773
Exactly! Think, Esca-stools or Stoolalators...

>>3596785
For them to work like that they would be quite bulky. Imagine a middle aged woman trying to get something off the top of her shelf and her stool just pushes her off the top. It will be a good addition to all those live leak videos of Chinese escalators eating people.

>>3596678
I've always wanted to start a gym but to get it all set up it would cost over $100k easy.

>>3596793
Hm, they would be quite big and heavy, we can put them on wheel to make them mobile. You can get on a Stoolalator and go vrooming around, truly a luxury of our time, now with integrated cloud technology.

>>3596678
>tell me all your ideas so i can steal them goy

>>3596678
chipotle, except for crepes

fast causal crepe place

>>3596734
there is something like this already where you can get random people to do weird things on webcams, and people pay like $4 to see someone stick a needle through their nipple on cam, as well as normal sexual private webcamming. Also sharpies and spoons are hardly porn, there is no market. and for that reason im out.

>>3596738
how much would you sell it for? what do YOU think you can make something like that for?

>>3596849
how much would you expect the adverage customer to spend while stopping in for crapes? they are cheap ass balls to make and people know that. How many employees would it take to run this store? Im out.

>>3596678
Exercise bikes that power small computers that mine crypto.

>>3596678
Ovens fueled by jews that power small computers that mine crypto.

>>3596931
this is actually a great idea

>>3596931
>>3596990
exercise bikes don't generate enough electricity to be worth the cost of materials

other forms of kinetic energy collection might work though

>>3597022
yeah youre right its a shit idea nvm

Mop suit. Its a full body suit that is made entirely from mop. You just put it on have a shower and slide around on the floor on your belly ir your back to clean, simply have shower again. This product is fun for whole family and will cut mop time in have if not quater.

>>3597157

Couldn't you just do the same thing wearing a shaggy dog costume?

>>3597157
I will give you 100 DGB for 80% ownership in your company.

>>3597157
kek

>>3596826
Is a gym really that profitable?

>>3596678

Shillcoin (SHIL) An altcoin that works exactly like most other altcoins but you use it exclusively to pay shills who pimp or FUB whatever other coins you want on /biz.

A YouTube channel that I post timelapses of me buying food/cooking it and eating takeaway and driving cars so I can list these activities that you would do everyday normally as business expenses, thus allowing to minimize tax. Also, a few dollars from ad revenue.

kneepad coin

it's an erc20 token that is the only form of payment we will accept on our website, which will only sell kneepads

>>3596678

I would share my ideas, but i'm afraid they will be stolen.

I'll share this though, I invented the mechanics of pokemon go, and even started a company trying to do GPS based collection game.


Another Idea of mine is self cooling beverage can.

Another is a story that you read toward an app while it responds to those words being read, showing a story.

I have many more but they are still being worked. on.

I don't like to brag, but I'm kind of an idea guy, the tricky part is doing.

>>3597934
Join the Stoolalator team, you're going places kid! We need an engineer to design a safety spike strip so that people are aware when they get too close to the edge of the Stoolalator and don't fall from it.

>>3596678
Genetically modified chickens, they will be 2 meters tall

>>3596678
wojack coin.

Hello Sharks,
My name is anon and my business will solve the problem of rising sea levels due to climate change.

What if there was a way to melt the ice caps and still have normal, regular old sea levels? Well, now there is!

Introducing the Sea Leveler! Now, we can suspend excess sea water above the ocean and enjoy pristine views of sea life as it swims into these transparent world savers! Simply anchor the patented Sea Leveler to the ocean floor. Next, make sure the Sea Leveler openings are below the surface of the ocean. Final step, just pump your excess sea water into the Sea Leveler and you're done! It's that easy!

So Sharks, who wants to get on pump it up with me, and together we can Level Up the Sea!

>>3598017
>yes

Ive always thought of this small food stall specializing in flavored chicken skin. Always loved those double fried korean chicken and wondered if anyone sells the same style of cooking but only on the skin.

>>3598019
>Tfw no offers

>>3598856
I'll give you 5 RDD for 95% ownership plus 50% royalty on each sale you make.

>>3598019
I'll give you 5 chicken tendies for 88% ownership and 67% of all Southeast Asia royalties final offer

>>3597442
~30 bucks a month per person and you only have to pay for water, electricity, rent, and wages.

>>3598983
Deal

>>3599043
You seriously took the chicken tendies over RDD?

1 RDD will be equivalent to 50 chicken tendies in mid 2018.

Helwo sharks my name is Apu Apustaja nd my idea is snocone

>>3599143
How did you get past our racial screening test?

>>3599076
I want my tendies now

Mass scale Hydroponic urban farm. For a mid size city. Supplying various restaurants, markets, schools, etc.

>>3599076
Nice try, Mr wonderful

>>3599167
our snocone is good a..and we get our snow free
we make enough snocone to help people

Index fund-like crypto platform but you invest in actual users who do their research and update the current holding % for each coin, and then the system buys/sells for all subscribers accordingly. A small fee goes to this user.

This would make crypto twitter faggots actually useful since you could just trust them and let them move your shit, and they would be inclined to make it work since they would gain from it.

Example: I log into the site, browse portfolios, see what my friends are riding, read about a guy that always goes into the right coins at the right time, subscribe to him.
Now my portfolio follows his to the %, he gains a little bit and I don't have to care about working for my money.

I started working on this but it's not like it's easy or I have the resources to pull it off soon.

>>3597781
i feel like this is legal, but i really wouldnt want to defend myself in court

>1. Fashion Branding Consultancy
I basically want to meet qt fashion designers and models, I have a few friends in this field so I understand it bretty gud. So already this is a bad idea... but...

I basically leverage my lib arts skills into creating content marketing for naive fashion designers, straight out of design school working on their first capsule collections. Mainly creating photography and videos and "PR pieces" that they can distribute online. Maybe I could form "strategic partnerships' with a roster of bloggers and instagrammers, but I want to focus more on the actual content side, not the PR side.

>2. Snarky Self-Help E-Books
Basically stuff with provocative titles 'How to suck slightly less' or 'Stop being a creep for 5 minutes and get laid'. I'm a very VERY fast writer and am a post-grad so I can at the very least fake some authoritative language. I figure this is low overhead since I reckon in one week I could easily smash out 10,000 words of content.

Not sure who my customer would be or my positioning.

>3. Family History Videos
My Uncle said to me there's a lot of bread to be made in getting Jewish people to pay you to research their family tree and produce a little film/documentary about their family history.

>fill a chest with a few thousand dollars worth in treasure and hide it somewhere near a populous city, in a park probably (but not buried)
>advertise around the city with flyers or even a billboard about the treasure with a website to go to
>have people pay me $9.99 on the site in order to get access to the clues
>have the option of more clues for another $9.99
>option to buy a map of the general area it's located in for $49.99
>hopefully get 2000+ people to do it and make $20,000-$40,000 per treasure hunt
>repeat in a different location after the first treasure is found

>>3599263
>Not sure who my customer would be or my positioning.
normies. youre targeting normies. the types who buy such books as "the man code" or "how to influence people" or "class, not swag" etc...

>>3599263
You sound like a huge faggot. I'm glad I can tell you're the type of person to stay poor.

>>3599267
this is actually pretty great, you could mask it off as a "pokemon go" like treasure hunt in real life making people move around, but in reality it would be like a ponzi raffle.

I think anything "prize related" where you charge for participation is a great way to make money.

>>3599294
True. gotta do some SEO research see what kind of funnel those normies go through to reach that kind of airy-fairy shit

>>3599295
Why do you think so? What would make money then?

>>3596678
Okay, I can't make an app so any dev. who somehow has good connections here's a shot in the dark.

>App for making appointments with anything.
>Primiarly aimed at healthcare, but can be used for anything, ex: Accounting office, Law firms, ect
>You get a code from your doctors office, of can their code
>You then can create appts. with said office through the app
>No phone call, no receptionist, payments handled by the app
>Cuts out the need for 3 people at the desk, now you just need one
>App would sned reminders for you for your appt.
>Ideally aimed for healthcare, but obv law firms, ect can use it to make appts with potental cleints

>>3599302
>>3599267
you do realize the plan falls apart the moment someone screenshots your "hints" and posts it online, just for the lulz. ive definitely spent $20 on the spot just for a giggle on this website

>>3599302
yeah have it like amazing race style around town with buy ins like daily fantasy and take a cut off the top
throw in some historical spots around town and make the normies jump up and down like they did something

>>3599326
I would get around this by having a countdown to the release of the clues. >>3599333
>make the normies jump up and down like they did something

Fuck, making money off of people is so fucking depressing and grimey

>>3599326
also, not saying this to kill the idea. i think it's a very novel approach towards geocaches, but there will be logistical problems from the start

>>3599342
>Fuck, making money off of people is so fucking depressing and grimey

reminder normies don't even care about being scammed if they're having fun, feel like they contributed to something or are under peer pressure.

they really are like sheep

>>3599342
It doesn't even need to be a competition, you can sell an adventure tour with qr codes at certain locations that give the next clue, or like pokemon go have gps location unlock the next clue.
design it around some story, or even create a platform where people can submit a story and you can pay them commission off people who purchase it

>>3599355
I don't want to scam anyone though

I wouldn't care if it made me a billionaire, I couldn't live with knowing I duped people for my own profit. Which is the name of the game in business I suppose.

I want to give them a genuinely good experience at least.

>>3599385
it's good to see people who think like you anon, even if what I said is true, this is always the legit way to do this.

>>3599267
To save yourself from people screenshooting it, have people collectively donate to it. Have it so if you raise 5k, you release a clue to the public.

>>3596678
TOILET WAVE SIMULATOR
>Avoid splash dump that your butthole might catch.
It will save all tissues that gone to waste to avoid dump splash, its ECO Friendly
Generates power with a mini turbine when your toilet tanks refills

5 BTC for development and patent, 20 BTC for manufacturing
This will be a million BTC industry
of course we're willing to be partners, 50%-50% shares

>>3597781
DSP? Is that you?

>>3599747
No, my child.

>>3599754
Shit, why is my ID different?
>>3599747 and >>3597781 are same anon

>>3599761
FUCK not >>3599747 I meant >>3599754