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2023-11: Warosu is now out of extended maintenance.

/biz/ - Business & Finance

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23918953 No.23918953 [Reply] [Original]

What is the best way to motivate employees who are "working" from home but not getting anything done?

>> No.23918983

Cancel their contract

>> No.23918991

imagine this absolute brapper gracing you with her presence a la emission for your nasal pleasure

>> No.23918998

>>23918991
No u

>> No.23919007

>>23918953
Have you considered bad/good wagie points

>> No.23919024

>>23919007
You mean like the star stickers they give you in 3rd grade?

>> No.23919025

>>23918953
my girlfriend gets the cats to do what she wants by squirting them with watersprayers. Try the equivalent of that but you know socially acceptable

>> No.23919071

Make them fill out timesheets.
Usually means I need to find 2-3 10 minute tasks to pretend took 3 hours and pad out my day of doing nothing.
Without them I'd probably do less.

>> No.23919092

>>23918953
Fire one of them to set an example

>> No.23919105

Have a team 'stomp stomp' dance via Zoom to start the day with you as the cheerleader. Guaranteed to increase motivation

>> No.23919139

>Make them come into the office once a month for team bonding.
>Lots of zoom meetings!
>Remind them how crucial this time is for the business
>Make them recap their work log in front of the rest of the team
>Build a toxic culture of snitching on slackers

Seriously OP, did you even try?

>> No.23919317

fire/threaten them, never forget everyone is replaceable

>> No.23919328
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23919328

>>23918953

>> No.23920067

>tfw no thicc latina gf farting on my face
it hurts

>> No.23920142

>>23918953
By realizing they were never working at the office, either. No one in those drone jobs does more than 2 hours of work per day.

>> No.23920157

>>23918953
Now this is a prank I can get behind

>> No.23920808
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23920808

>>23918991
my little sister used to fart in my face when we were kids and had to share a bed. We literally spent all night farting in each others faces and smelling it once.

>> No.23920838

>>23919105
kek

>> No.23920865

>>23918953
God i wish that was me

>> No.23920869

That's disgusting. Id dump her right on the spot.
>inb4 low t

>> No.23920874
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23920874

I don't really get it, though. "Prank" implies some of sort of trick. A bait and switch.
This is literally just farting in someone's face. This is what constitutes a prank, now?

>> No.23920899

>>23920869
I would marry her on the spot

>> No.23920907

god fuckin dammit I need a girlfriend again. fuck COVID. worst time to be single

>> No.23920935

>>23920899
I cant say what i would do to her on the spot on this hindu mudpiling forum

>> No.23922060

>>23918953
how much Fuse does this gross man hodl?

>> No.23922100

>>23920874
The prank is the link eye that comes later