/biz/ - Business & Finance

>>20915731
Rope

>>20915731
u r gay

>>20915731
Jump in a river.

Stop eating.

>>20915806
What if OP can swim? I say jump from a tall building. All you have to do is take the elevator

>>20915731
LMAO you get liq'd buddy?

>>20915731
Your portfolio will go up 50x when you’re dead because you’ll finally fucking hold for once.

>>20915819
Ironically that would likely save him and most of /biz/

>>20915806
This and take a deep breath, it wont be fun and you will have to struggle against the natural reaction to live but its free

Holocaust victims said masturbation machines are a thing. Try that out

buying a brick of heroin with no tolerance is probably the least painful way....what im conidering doing if link tumbles i just cant win in life no matter what i do this is my last ditch effort idc anymore. started life as a solid christian and only ever got shit on for it turned to a sociopathic lifestyle now here i am equally fucked there is no earthly karma in existance which contradicts the bible idk what to believe if i dont come up soon i give up fuck it no orgasm or momentary pleasure is enough for me anymore and any chance at anything deeper or fullfilling is soley dependent on my financial situation which appears bleek atm. godspeed anons wish me the best.

>>20915898
Thanks dude. Made my day

>>20916030
Fuck that. If you want to die be a man and feel all the pain that comes with it. Go monk style and burn yourself without flinching

>>20916030
>any chance at anything deeper or fullfilling is soley dependent on my financial situation
anon

>>20916030
try meditating retard

>>20915731
life

>>20916030
just do heroin without overdosing yourself. you'll be content

>>20915731
starvation

>>20916030
Anon, even if you make it, if you are miserable before you are rich you’ll unironically be more miserable after as weird as that sounds.

If you are going to kill yourself you might as well learn what the Bible says you have to do to live forever. Here is some dude explaining it on youtube:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qDI-VMydFlM

>>20916030
if you ultimately end up with nothing except $500 in monopoly crypto money then you can probably get a pretty sweet deal on the darknet. you’d be supporting small business too. gl finding “black tar” wherever the hell you live without getting robbed or beaten

just walk into the woods and hope a bear gets you cause a bear just got you lol

>>20915731
I know this is bait but since my father committed suicide I have to say this. Don't commit suicide. The moment your despair gets to the point you think suicide is your only option and you choose not to KYS your timeline changes. Life paths are real but so is freewill and freewill over powers life paths. If you don't kys your OG life path changes and your free will decides your future from this point on. So take this opportunity to make life different but to make it different you have to do different.

inhale a glass of water

>>20916797
Damn wish I didnt want to kill myself this timeline fucking sucks lol

What's less painful drowning or suffocation?

>>20915852
Everybody drowns when they stay in the river anon. Some rivers will drag you under.

>>20915731
naruto run into area 51
>instantly die as a bullet showers the ground in your blood like a water balloon bursting
>...
>a blinding light
>you try to cover your eyes with hands that feel like they were restrained by a heavy jacket
>all at once you feel a myriad of sensations that overwhelm your mind
>heart racing
>a strong smell of sulfur
>a burning heat emanating from inside you similar to the sensation of eating something spicy
>hot and cold your body begins sweating and shivering in confusion
>then nothing
>it was but an instant and the memory of that pain disappears like a dream
>something begins to materialize in front of you
>a blue flannel shirt
>a well-groomed beard
>your hear a somber voice
>"my child"
>"why did you not believe in me" he asks
>tears stream down your face as you realize you didn't have a suicide stack